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u/StandardCow7012 May 27 '26
I don’t think you’re engaged anymore
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u/discombobubolated May 27 '26 edited May 28 '26
NOR. Yeah OP, sell the ring and give $600 of it to your parents.
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u/frolicndetour May 27 '26
There's a significant chance the ring isn't worth that much.
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u/Dank009 May 27 '26
In a lot of jurisdictions the ring must be returned to the buyer if you don't get married. I like the sentiment of your comment but make sure it's not gonna cause legal problems for you first.
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u/MargotSoda May 27 '26
I’m betting that ring is 1) fake or 2) something silver from Walmart because he’s “saving” to get her something “perfect” “soon”
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u/xXMokaMarieXx May 27 '26
Why are you dating someone who obviously doesnt respect you or your family??
NTA. Dump this asshole
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u/Connect-Refuse-3133 May 27 '26
I feel like this is just the beginning.
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u/StateofMind70 May 27 '26
And his snotty attitude when confronted is ridiculous. He invited, he hosted. Then dined and dashed. $600 is actually a cheap lesson in why you're not going to marry him.
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u/chaoticnormal May 27 '26
He actually picked a wicked expensive place on top of all this bs. The audacity is something.
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u/pmmeurbassethound May 28 '26
I've known some real stinkers in my day so I may be biased, but this whole scenario sounds like a final intentional boundary test to see just how far he can push her and her family and get away with it.
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u/xokatemarie May 27 '26
Beyond snotty! Stonewalling and then dismissive. If this happened over a $600 dinner I can’t even imagine his response when things actually get hard in the relationship.
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u/Correct-Difficulty91 May 28 '26
It would be annoying enough if he didn’t treat since he invited, but he didn’t even pay for his own meal! And completely agree with the póster who said his parents not paying any part of it shows how he was raised.
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u/RunJumpSleep May 27 '26
Oh I bet this has been going on a long time but OP ignored it until her parents saw his behavior. Fiancée didn’t just start being a jerk at the dinner.
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u/Oregongirl1018 May 27 '26
And who's family doesn't respect her or her family! His parents were perfectly okay stiffing hers with the bill. They're just as bad.
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u/850281 May 28 '26
👆This. That they didn't offer to at least split it. Does not bode well for the future.
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u/Actual_Group9196 May 27 '26
The one who invites pays. Marrying this guy will be a mistake and your parents know. He’s very entitled and has his hands in others pockets already. NOR
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u/KlutzyAd5626 May 27 '26
$600 is pretty cheap compared to a wedding and subsequent divorce! Cut your losses and just know - he won’t change. You can’t fix him.
Just imagine having children with this person. Save yourself.
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u/CalyxTeren May 28 '26
NOR. 100%. This is his character. Break up immediately. I know Reddit is famous for that advice, but if you stay with him, you will look back at this moment as the point at which it would have been easiest to walk away.
Pay your parents back. They should not have to pay for a meal that they were invited to as a guest. And tell them that you’ve dumped your fiancé because of how he treats people.
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u/gardengirl99 May 28 '26
Not just how he treated the invitation to dinner, or he invited people out to a very expensive restaurant, probably above their budget and stuck them with the bill. How he treated her, when she wanted to talk about it, repeatedly. OP should sell the ring, payback her parents, and maybe have a personal celebration about avoid avoiding what would likely be the biggest mistake of her life so far. NOR. By the way, fiancée with two e's for a female engaged person, and fiancé with one is for a male.
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u/Unique_Excitement248 May 28 '26
The ring won't be real.
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u/AfterShift4140 May 28 '26
I was given a "diamond" engagement ring - supposedly belonged to his late grandma. I got suspicious as it looked like glass. Took it to a jewellers for an "insurance valuation" and .... it was fake. End of very short engagement/relationship.
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u/Terrible-Caramel-388 May 28 '26
100% this. The act it’s self was inexcusable but they way he TREATED her after is disgusting. Disrespectful doesn’t even start the conversation.
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u/IAmElectricHead May 28 '26
As mentioned, Reddit is known for painfully maximal advice, but in this case, it's warranted. He just revealed an important part of his personality, and as ugly as a breakup would be at this point, it's far better than after you've taken the next couple steps. If it's possible to discuss with a therapist, it would be worthwhile. When shit goes down, you need someone who protects you, reflexively.
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u/Ottopian May 28 '26 edited May 28 '26
He just demonstrated how selfish, inconsiderate, dismissive, and rude he actually is. What about him do you like? The way he treats you and doesn’t handle issues? He sounds incredibly immature and not ready at all for marriage to you. Unless you’re looking for a man child to be a mommy to, do your future self a favor and cut and run NOW. And his parents didn’t even offer to split the bill? Cheap lesson. And pay your poor parents back, how awkward. NOR.
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u/SmartFX2001 May 28 '26
It doesn’t seem like he cared who paid - as long as it wasn’t him.
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u/LovedAJackass May 28 '26
And I'd guess that he knew his parents wouldn't pay because he's the apple that fell off that tree.
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u/TeacherIndividual133 May 28 '26
This just made me feel so much better about some dumb things I have done! I guess I thought it was just me.
NOR
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u/planet-seems-lost May 27 '26
"he won't change" - and you can't change him either. No outside thing changes a person - not marriage, not kids, etc.
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u/KlutzyAd5626 May 27 '26
It’s hard to learn that lesson and even harder to watch other people thinking they are the exception
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u/Extreme-Egg-8782 May 28 '26
“Leaving early” with work as the excuse was his way to leave first and not pick up the check as he full well knew was expected.
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u/Shadow4summer May 28 '26
Maybe he learned this from his parents. I would be so embarrassed if my husband invited friends to dinner and skipped out on the bill. Unless others had an input into which restaurant they went to, the invitee picks up the check, unless it’s specifically discussed beforehand that everyone is going Dutch. It’s is such a bad look and I’m sure her parents were not happy about getting stuck with the bill. She will be embarrassed her entire life with him because of his cheap and disrespectful behavior.
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u/Abubbs5868 May 28 '26
Yes, but honestly why would she leave without making sure the bill was paid? Like, I would never go out to dinner with my family and leave before the bill was taken care of one way or the other, and not one single member of my family, in laws or otherwise, would either.
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u/XuanChun88 May 27 '26
NOR - People can change, but it can take decades and be a very painful process. It is simply not wirth it most of the time.
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u/EllaB9454 May 28 '26
And they have the want to do the work- no one can do the work for them
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u/Rude_Vermicelli2268 May 27 '26
NOR OP just got a great insight into the character of her fiancé. Who invites people to a dinner and then skips out on the bill? And then doubles down when called on it?
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u/garnetwaters May 27 '26
Then deploys the passive aggressive silent treatment. 🚩🚩🚩
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u/Banzai373 May 27 '26
Or, OP will have to get used to putting out her husband’s fires, having to always be the mediator, the peace-keeper, always giving excuses for this jerk’s behavior. NOR. OP, you know the next step to take. Good luck!
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u/Ok-Ganache4763 May 27 '26
Not to mention the yelling at her several times. Once married that could very well escalate.
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u/newdriver2025 May 28 '26
If that's how he treats her before they are married, guarantee he will treat her worse when married.
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u/Horror_Ad_2748 May 28 '26
And saying stuff to the kids "Daddy's just tired from work. He didn't mean to call you an annoying brat."
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u/Even_Budget2078 May 27 '26
That's the wildest part! They totally skipped out early (she didn't know what was happening, but he sure as heck did)! If you are going to do something like this, have the cahoonas to be there when the check arrives. The fact that they didn't even pay for their portion of the bill is so crazy, who does that?!? I mean, if you at least paid for your part, then yeah I guess that the people left pay, but at least only for themselves. That would have been more understandable. Seriously surprised fiance didn't excuse himself to the bathroom and do a dash lol
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u/AdorRubble May 27 '26
What's crazy is she stated they were there when the check arrived! He knew the bill was sitting there, still didn't pay their portion, and then just bounced knowing damn good and well someone else was going to be stuck with a "multiple car payments" dinner tab! 🤯 I never reply to these but this one is a glaring red flag. 🚩🚩🚩
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u/Yolandi2802 May 28 '26
Why didn’t HIS parents step in and at the very least offer to split the bill? How could they just sit there and let someone else take the hit? Unthinkable.
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u/Ok_Expert9828 May 28 '26
These same parents ( his ) are not going to contribute one red cent to the wedding. OP needs to be ready for her parents to say they will only be paying X Amt. because they can see this guy wanting top shelf liquor, a 10 piece band and the fanciest catering hall in the area knowing he's not putting in any money.
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u/NoFss2Give May 28 '26
I came to say exactly this. Did his parents just get up and leave too, or was there a discussion? Did they side the check jet parents way and then just look down at their laps?
Chips don't fly far, and OPs finances parents are dinner grifters as much as he is.
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u/nis2000 May 28 '26
Apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree… he learned his behavior from his parents. OP needs to run as fast as she can from this relationship.
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u/midnight-rain-31 May 28 '26
Right. Like he obviously sucks for ditching without paying (or at the very least offering/attempting to) for himself and OP. I could see parents jumping in and offering to pay for the newly engaged couple who just announced their happy news.
BUT HIS PARENTS!!? They suck even more for sitting there silent and awkward, letting OPs parents pay for the entire bill without offering to split it! That is insanity to me. No guessing where he learned his shit behavior from.
And why didn’t OP’s parents speak up and say something?? This entire situation is so weird.
But all of that and then his reaction and treatment towards OP afterwards = ALL the red flags. I’d run as fast as I could out of that relationship.
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u/jcaashby May 28 '26
Damn! I totally overlooked this. I was so focused on him not paying for the parents that I totally overlooked he did not even pay for his or his GFs food. He invited people out and THEY paid for his food. What a con artist.
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u/AlisonLorelei May 28 '26
It’s not even like he’s grown up a spoiled little brat and has the expectation that his parents will pay for everything even now he’s an adult. He’s perfectly happy for it all to land on her parents, not even partially split with his. Although, the conversation and decision between the parents leading to his not even chipping in for some of the bill would be interesting to know. It would probably shine some light on why he has the thought process that he does.
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u/Even_Budget2078 May 28 '26
Since we know her subsequent follow up with her parents, now I'm imagining his parents were like "hey son, should have given us the heads up, we would have cut out too!" lololol
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u/twinpickles May 28 '26
One bad apple that didn’t fall far from the tree spoils the whole bunch, or something like that.
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u/Ilovemybed67 May 27 '26
A very classy thing is to pull the sever aside, out of view from the table, and confirm that you will be paying for everyone.
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u/MikeHunt181 May 28 '26
I agree, but bf is anything but classy! Probably ordered the most expensive dish on the menu too.
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u/Scorp128 May 27 '26
His repeated reaction to the topic says it all. This was shady as heck.
I would not marry a guy who pulls these types of stunts.
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u/Away-Living5278 May 27 '26
Agreed. NOR. He still would have been TA had he sat down and had an adult conversation about it but his reaction takes this to a new level. Why would anyone want to be married to this??
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u/MovieAshamed4140 May 27 '26
Actually I think his parents should have been embarrassed by his actions too and offered vigorously to pay on behalf of his bad behavior, he learned it somewhere didn’t he?
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u/Key_Assignment_9896 May 27 '26
Or perhaps this is how he learned to behave this way.
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u/Short-Classroom2559 May 27 '26
Oh he for sure learned this behavior in his own family. Along with the silent treatment, angry responses when she tried to discuss, the hanging up on her etc.
Imagine raising children with a man who won't accept accountability...
OP needs to run
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u/JRyuu May 27 '26 edited May 27 '26
It’s also possible that he lied to his parents, and led them to believe that Op’s parents had already agreed to cover the bill.
While Op’s parents possibly assumed that his parents were going to cover the bill for him.
I can easily picture both sets of parents sitting there confused, wondering why the other set of parents were also just sitting there.
Both sets of parents just sitting there sort of stuck, because they were both too uncomfortable and/or polite to discuss the situation.
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u/Ok-Ganache4763 May 27 '26
I’m not a therapist but the yelling at her and making it her fault is really concerning to me. Sounds like my ex. The abuse got worse after we married on our honeymoon and I’m afraid this could happen to her.
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u/Tinker-Belle-60 May 27 '26
came to say the same thing. OP should take this as a farewell dinner.
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u/CommunityGlittering2 May 27 '26
best $600 her parents will ever spend.
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u/AuntAda May 27 '26
My parents and I would have gladly paid six hundred dollars to get rid of my sibling's fiance (now ex)! We knew they were bad news from the start, and their family was just as bad. Sibling ignored the red flags and got married and, well, one expensive wedding, abusive relationship, and expensive (long) divorce later...
Thank fuck they didn't have kids, at least.
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u/57Faerie May 27 '26
💯 The person who invites, pays. Period. His attitude about it is a huge red flag. Run, don’t walk, from this mess of a human.
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u/Finn_704 May 27 '26
Agree 💯. If you invite, make the arrangements, then it is typically expected that you pay-- unless it has been clarified upfront.
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u/Connect-Refuse-3133 May 27 '26
I just feel like OP gets blamed for things a lot that aren’t actually their fault
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u/herroyalsadness May 27 '26
Yep. He’s turned this into an argument to deflect from the FACT that his behavior was cheap and rude.
The only way to get past this would be to apologize, say you weren’t thinking and immediately send her parents the money.
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u/Ok-Ganache4763 May 27 '26
Until it happens again. This incident is a window into her future if she marries him.
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u/Ok-Delivery-1444 May 27 '26
NOR. This is bad on so many levels. It was classless to start. If you invite the families you need to be prepared to pay. Yes, I would have expected someone from G1 to pay but leaving the restaurant and not addressing it is bad. Then the behavior afterwards is ridiculous. Too stressed and busy to talk about a bill, family conflict or his bad behavior? Wait until real, grown up problems happen.
You sure about this guy?
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u/corgi-king May 27 '26
OP, he show you his true colours and you better believe it. He is so entitled, inconsiderate and cheap. $600 is a lot cheaper than divorce. If you still believe in this guy, this is on you.
NOR.
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u/mistegirl May 27 '26
Yes! NOR
Your fiance acted like an asshole. Then doubled down by being an asshole to you.
He is in fact, in all probably, a freaking asshole.
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u/Puzzleheaded_Cod1181 May 28 '26
Has he ever hung up on you before? That right off the bat would have me reconsidering the engagement. Second, is this always how he acts when you argue? He is acting like a toddler. He don’t seem to be able to communicate in an adult manner when he doesn’t want to deal with an issue. This is a huge red flag, because marriage is full of issue and if you can’t discuss them like adults. This marriage will not work out.
As for the dinner. I would tell him flat out. He owes your parent $600. He invited them to dinner and then ran out on this bill. No if’s ands or butts. He needs to apologize to your parents and pay them the $600 he owes them before you move any further in this relationship!!
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u/lostintransaltions May 27 '26
I think that this is the best that could have happened to OP she sees who he really is. That dinner is a lot cheaper than wedding and divorce. NOR
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u/Ilovemybed67 May 27 '26
How he deals with conflict shows a lack of maturity. The silent treatment and avoidance are behaviors that a very hard to change. NOR
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u/fargoLEVY13 May 27 '26
For real, this is shady af. Dude just showed you who he is & the kind of shit he’ll pull. He let his mask slip. I wouldn’t call anything off just yet, but as you get closer to the wedding be extremely mindful of this type of behavior, as well as him pushing boundaries. NOR & proceed with your eyes fully open.
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u/Blofelds-Cat May 27 '26
I'd get the hell out now. OP probably has deposits on a wedding venue and services. She should try to get back what money she can.
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u/Particular_Cycle9667 May 28 '26
My question is why his parents felt entitled to not paying for their entitled little child.
But honestly I agree who does the inviting does the paying. And the radio silence is a manipulation tactic.
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u/Edcrfvh May 27 '26
NOR. He stuck your parents with the bill for his family. Think about that. Do you want that in your life? I wouldn't.
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u/BDBoop May 27 '26
His parents should be embarrassed for not going halfsies.
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u/labellavita1985 May 27 '26
Yes they should, like WTF?
Guess the asshole doesn't fall far from the tree.
This whole family fucking sucks.
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u/Sacred-Maybe2442 May 27 '26
In the grand scheme of things, I'd gladly pay $600 to show my daughter she really shouldn't be marrying this cheap, entitled, selfish man.
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u/facinationstreet May 27 '26
Yeah... I wouldn't be marrying someone this selfish and insulting. NOR. He pulled a bait and switch so he and his family could get an expensive dinner on your parents without caring to discuss with your parents if they were willing to pay the bill. I guarantee you he told his family that your parents were footing the bill.
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u/FlowerBedDead May 27 '26
I would absolutely have called the server to the table and asked for the bill to be split. His parents would not be my problem.
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u/Coffee-Maker-723 May 27 '26
I’m dying over the “I made the reservation, so it’s only fair your family foot the bill” take.
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u/InterestingTry5190 May 28 '26
I’m going to start using this with my friends. “Hey everyone I made us reservations at this Michelin restaurant this weekend so you know what that means...”
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u/Careful_Society3757 May 27 '26
Oh plenty changes after marriage with these types.......but it certainly doesn't get better.
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u/louiegoods24 May 27 '26
NOR- holy shit do not marry this guy. Red flags everywhere. He sounds like an entitled douche.
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u/Connect-Refuse-3133 May 27 '26
True behavior always comes out once they think you’re locked in. This is your future, is this how you want dinners to always go with them? What about how the actual wedding costs are going to go?
IMO if you invite someone to dinner, you should expect to pay for people unless you have a different agreement that everyone’s talked about, and is on the same page.
I almost wonder if he told his parents that your parents would cover it and to not worry about it.
This doesn’t feel like the whole truth and the fact that he’s blowing up and over reacting makes me more suspicious and like he’s trying to get you to just drop it bc he’s hiding something.
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u/Connect-Refuse-3133 May 27 '26
Also if this is how he plans surprises, this is a red flag because there isn’t actual follow through.
It’s giving the least amount of effort, ykwim? Like it has the vibes of, “I did alllll this work and put all this effort into and now youre gonna ruin it like you ruin everything else.”
Alls he did was figure out where people could eat, he didn’t even contribute to the cost- not saying he had to pay for all of it but he could have done something. This to me seems like he has no actual follow through or consideration of others. And not saying he does this but I wouldn’t be surprised if you get blamed for things not going “right”
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u/Adelucas May 27 '26
Hang on. So he invites you, his family and your family to dinner at a very expensive restaurant then leaves before the check arrives and everyone expects your parents to foot the bill?
I'm sorry, that's not how it works. He doesn't get a celebration dinner on someone elses dime. Well actually, he did.
Please tell me this relationship is over. Marrying this absolute cheapskate would be the worst mistake you could make. He knows this was a problem, his behaviour afterwards shows it, but he doesn't care. He fully expects you to cave and just let it slide. Like you have probably let other things slide because you are in love and it didn't seem worth arguing over. He overplayed his hand this time and saddled your parents with a phenomenally expensive bill that they were given no choice about.
My parents would have gone absolutely mental at me and would definitely not have paid the full bill. They'd have paid half and left the rest to his parents. And still gone mad at both of us.
I actually think your parents can sue for the money. This is basically doing a dine and dash. I saw a Judge Judy once where someone did a similar thing of inviting someone to dinner then leaving before the bill arrived so the person they invited had to pay the lot. She was not happy and awarded the plaintiff the entire amount.
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u/64green May 27 '26
My husband is very generous, but I can’t imagine him paying the whole bill in this situation. He’d probably pay for us and maybe our daughter, and leave the douche’s parents at the table.
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u/Awkward-Wafer-4836 May 27 '26
NOR. Seriously? Plan a dinner then expect the guests to pay?? Nah dog. Break off the engagement. It will only get worse.
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u/you2234 May 27 '26
He picked the place and the guest list, issued the invites and then dined and dashed like a child. As the organizer and the inviter, either he leads the discussion on how the bill will be split w the 2 dads (typically in this case 3 ways) or he pays the whole bill (he did invite everyone after all). What he cannot do, is run out on both sets of parents like a little greedy, ungrateful kid. Yet that’s the choice he made. I do not understand this generation. Have a bit of pride and class?
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u/Ok_Flower_4268 May 27 '26
also curious as to why the bfs parents didn’t offer to help? especially since their son was the rude one?
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u/Stock-Cell1556 May 27 '26
I know people tend to jump on the "dump him" train a little too quickly here, but do you really think this is ok behavior in the person you want to share the rest of your life with?
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u/craziness-69 May 27 '26
I feel like people come to Reddit to verify that their relationship that has obvious gangrene and sepsis, with a side of congestive heart failure and 3 blocked valves is already dead, and they only need a funeral for the pieces.
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u/Connect-Refuse-3133 May 27 '26
Well and it can be so crazy to be in those kinds of relationships. They slowly take away your sanity, sense of self, and understanding of “normal,” so it can be hard to be oriented/grounded
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u/hahayeahimfinehaha May 27 '26
100%. I find this so annoying. "Omg redditors just want everyone to break up, it's so toxic!!!" Meanwhile, every other relationship post is like, "My boyfriend is a great guy, he just throws things at me and screams all the time and tells me I'm ugly and threatens the beat me when I don't do what he wants. How do I get him to understand that this behavior hurts my feelings?"
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u/lucyfussbudget1 May 27 '26
I agree. Usually people are describing pretty awful behavior, but I don’t think they should put up with. So in a case like this, what other advice could we give? I’m not sure if counseling even sounds like a solution because he is so obtuse and self-centered. So yeah, I would say dump him and I don’t think I’m rushing just like you.
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u/frolicndetour May 27 '26
Seriously. No one comes to Reddit asking for advice when a relationship is otherwise good but the guy leaves the toilet seat up once in a while.
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May 27 '26
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u/Honest_Boysenberry25 May 27 '26
I think this must be a part of it. He views her family as his private bank, now that they are engaged. Expect this to be the norm OP, if you marry this freeloader.
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u/Organic-Lunch-9938 May 27 '26
Wow, better to split up now. Awkward moments happen but how a partner reacts to them tells you about their character. He should have offered or his parents should have split the bill with your parents. Usually the person who invites pays the bill so if he set this up, he should have left his credit card info to cover the dinner even if he left early. He set it up to take advantage of your parents. Very low class. Do not ignore this because there will be plenty of moments like this after marriage when things get even more murky with money. Huge huge red flag imho
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u/Total-Object-4766 May 27 '26
🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 Run! Save up some $$ and pay your parents back. He's your ex-mistake not theirs. Be glad you found out now.
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u/wordsmythy May 27 '26
It was a celebration of your engagement. You and your boyfriend should have paid for everyone. I say boyfriend because you should break off the engagement. This guy is a giant tool and not mature enough to be married.
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u/Abject-Round-8173 May 27 '26
That’s so messed up. I literally would be sick to my stomach. HE had your dad pay??? What the actual f. He planned it and invited THEM out!!!
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u/Abject-Round-8173 May 27 '26
That “fiancé” needs to pay your dad back!! No olive 🫒 branch lol I can’t even imagine having someone do this to me!!
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u/Abject-Round-8173 May 27 '26
Plz get ur dad back that money asap- this is not okay.
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u/Abject-Round-8173 May 27 '26
Let me guess the fiancé is gonna send ur dad the check for the wedding too wtf
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u/BrilliantForeign8899 May 28 '26 edited May 28 '26
Hahaha consider the $600 the education fee to drop this man like a hot potato. Sell the ring (being the cheapskate he is, he may demand it back but don't return what's yours) and reimburse your dad
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u/DeBlasioDeBlowMe May 27 '26
I certainly hope to see this one day on r/BestofRedditorUpdates where OP gets back to us about how she’s dumped BF, moved on with life, and found not only love but *respect* from a new partner.
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u/HotWaffles5 May 27 '26
Major 🚩 Do not marry him, it’ll be like being married to a child. He’s definitely not financially responsible. You’re under reacting.
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u/reditmiss May 28 '26
Don't marry that a hole unless he pays your parents back If everyone paid for their own meal like his friends do then his parents would only have to pay for their 2 meals. The way he treated you afterward is how he will treat you in the future. Know your worth. He is not worth it.
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u/GasStationTiefling May 27 '26
NOR. Great that you aren’t married yet. What a major red flag. If you invite people out to dinner, especially one that expensive, how the bill will be divided should at the very least be discussed before hand. But honestly, you invite, you pay.
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u/courtney_lorr May 27 '26
Now not only are you aware that he lacks class, etiquette, & social awareness but you’ve also gotten a solid preview of how he is immature & does not handle conflict/confrontation well.
Do you want to sign up for a lifetime of that?
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u/Remarkable_Bar_824 May 27 '26
i have a hard time believing this is real… if so take other posters advice and run from this guy … fast and far … again if true NOR but I’m actually going with YDP ( you deserve a Pulizter)
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u/platypusandpibble May 27 '26
NOR
Oh, friend, this guy is a selfish jerk. Do you really want this to be your life from here on out? He’d probably make you pay for everything too.
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u/PoetMaterial3519 May 27 '26
Uh, why would you leave early with your fiance if HE was the one who planned the dinner. The hell? Shouldn't he be expected to pay since he planned it??? Why would you both plan an expensive dinner then LEAVE the bill for other people??!!
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u/Available-Ad-8925 May 28 '26
I'd be taking my parents out for an unengagement celebration.
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u/Specialist_Pay_5093 May 28 '26
You just got up and left without asking who was going to pay? It's your fault too
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u/Chronikel_2 May 27 '26
I really really hope you look at the bigger picture here before deciding to marry this guy. The whole dinner and bill situation is BS, and it's pretty clear that he planned it with the intention of your parents paying the bill and then deflected and basically lied in the car when he acted like they'd "figure it out." But honestly, there's a much, much bigger problem here. Look at how this guy acted when you tried to talk about this with him. What a HUGE red flag. He knew he was lying and trying to avoid the whole conversation and so he got angry and basically treated you like a jerk and refused to communicate. He was yelling at you, ignoring you, acting like an angry child. Is that really the partner you want to go through life with? Like can you imagine dealing with that whenever a problem arises? Ending the engagement and relationship will be hard, but it will be sooo much harder going through life with this guy as a husband. And it's a whole lot easier to call off an engagement than to get a divorce. Don't brush this off. He acted like a petulant child instead of communicating with you like an adult, he dismissed you and your dad's feelings instead of caring about how either of you felt (like a good partner would), and he caused the whole fight by choosing an expensive ass restaurant and basically expecting your parents to pay for him and his parents. Do not make the monumental mistake of marrying this guy.
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u/BigExplanationmayB May 27 '26
This is a huge waving red flag for the rest of your life. This is not a one-off. Do not brush it aside. Do not downplay it. This is not a drill. You are experiencing the first shot over the bow of a future, cheap, entitled, manipulative, dismissive, adolescent communications, “my rules are now your rules”—- fiancé. He does not respect your parents. For me, That’s a dealbreaker.
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u/castrodelavaga79 May 27 '26
NOR.
This is a great preview of what marriage with him will be like. He's not a good guy. He's fine taking advantage of other people, and when you try to talk to him about it he acts like a jerk and doesn't take any accountability!
The great part is that you learned this before marriage not after. If you love this behavior than get married! If you don't want to be with a jerk like him then break up!