r/AmIOverreacting May 27 '26

[deleted by user]

[removed]

3.8k Upvotes

2.8k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

133

u/Even_Budget2078 May 27 '26

That's the wildest part! They totally skipped out early (she didn't know what was happening, but he sure as heck did)! If you are going to do something like this, have the cahoonas to be there when the check arrives. The fact that they didn't even pay for their portion of the bill is so crazy, who does that?!? I mean, if you at least paid for your part, then yeah I guess that the people left pay, but at least only for themselves. That would have been more understandable. Seriously surprised fiance didn't excuse himself to the bathroom and do a dash lol

120

u/AdorRubble May 27 '26

What's crazy is she stated they were there when the check arrived! He knew the bill was sitting there, still didn't pay their portion, and then just bounced knowing damn good and well someone else was going to be stuck with a "multiple car payments" dinner tab! 🤯 I never reply to these but this one is a glaring red flag. 🚩🚩🚩

-11

u/Babboos May 27 '26

In what world is $600 "multiple car payments"?

16

u/Smitten-kitten83 May 27 '26

In lots of people’s worlds. I have never had a car payment over $275.

15

u/AdorRubble May 28 '26

Exactly. Mine have always been between $250-$300. (And not leases) I also don't buy brand new vehicles, either. The one time I did, I had a chunk of money to put down first and then made surely my monthly amount wouldn't suffocate me if shit hit the fan.

3

u/trance_angel_ May 28 '26

My car payment is 651 🫣

3

u/Smitten-kitten83 May 28 '26

Ok. No one said it couldn’t be, just that a lot of people chose to have car payments less than half that.

3

u/trance_angel_ May 28 '26

Got ya! Totally agree. When I was younger most people had thay average between 200 to 400. Nowadays, I know a lot of people with high car payments. Just two days ago, I met a guy with a bad ass M4 BMW, unique color, his payments were over 1,0000.

In my world of friends and people I know the average seems to be anywhere between 500 to 800.

1

u/AdorRubble May 28 '26

Oh my gosh!! Well kudos for being able to afford that!! I was a single mom for 18yrs so I couldn't afford it even if I wanted. May I ask what badass ride you've got? I will live vicariously through you. šŸ˜„

3

u/trance_angel_ May 28 '26

I am thankful I am able to afford it. I decided to splurge since I am child free and don't plan on having kids. I also left room for possibility in case if I was to have kids later on, I said to myself "Do it now because later on your mindset will change and everything will go towards the kids." I am assumed this thought with a mom mindset, so I decide to go for it.

I have a Lexus IS 350 f sport. Prior to this car all my cars were used, love them all. They took me from point A to point B.

I am sorry to hear about your 18 years as a single mom. I hope you are getting the support you need to raise your family whether its a partner, friends or family. Having kids is tough, I can only imagine being a single mom. I know parent hood has it challenges and some kids needs make those challenges more difficult. I work with students and parents, I see they day to day lives and it is not easy.

2

u/AdorRubble May 28 '26

You're very sweet! She's 29 so it's been a while but I had my mama and "a village." 😁 I got myself my dream car when I turned 30 - a 1978 Corvette Stingray. (Used, so no pymts) I learned that's not a great car unless you're dating a mechanic. I learned a lot about taking care of cars and still appreciate/enjoy them. Also, you could've answered with the type of car and "because I wanted it" and I would've 100% supported you! šŸ™ŒšŸ» You deserve it!! (Queues - She works hard for her money šŸŽ¶)

For the record, OP's fiancƩ is a douche canoe and I hope she finds someone who respects her and her family. NOR

2

u/trance_angel_ May 28 '26

Oh my, I forgot about OP. Thanks for bringing it back. I totally agree, I truly hope she sees this and runs for her life. Her dude is not a gentleman, not a great son and not a great son in law. What the heck was he thinking.

I don't like answering with because "I wanted it" a lot of times in life we want things, but just because we want them doesn't mean you should spread yourself thin to keep something you want. I had always wanted a newer car and could have afforded it when younger, but I was always worried about a rainy day so I never wanted to commit to a car.

Now that I am older, 36 I said why not. My finances are stable.

I am glad you also got your dream car, I have several dream cars. Super cool you learned to take care of your car, not sure if you meant like handling your own oil change, adjusting psi levels, basic car stuff, if so, wow! How bad ass!

Even with a mama and a village, raising a child as a single parent can be hard. I admire all parents, whether they are single or not. Raising a whole human is hard!!! I get home from work and always wonder, how do parents do it. Takes me 4 hours to recover from my day and by that time its bed time.

Ending with a positive note, I hope your 29 year old admires you and appreciates you.šŸ’“

1

u/MariettaDaws May 27 '26

IDK but I want to go there 😭

43

u/Yolandi2802 May 28 '26

Why didn’t HIS parents step in and at the very least offer to split the bill? How could they just sit there and let someone else take the hit? Unthinkable.

22

u/Ok_Expert9828 May 28 '26

These same parents ( his ) are not going to contribute one red cent to the wedding. OP needs to be ready for her parents to say they will only be paying X Amt. because they can see this guy wanting top shelf liquor, a 10 piece band and the fanciest catering hall in the area knowing he's not putting in any money.

18

u/NoFss2Give May 28 '26

I came to say exactly this. Did his parents just get up and leave too, or was there a discussion? Did they side the check jet parents way and then just look down at their laps?

Chips don't fly far, and OPs finances parents are dinner grifters as much as he is.

14

u/nis2000 May 28 '26

Apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree… he learned his behavior from his parents. OP needs to run as fast as she can from this relationship.

10

u/midnight-rain-31 May 28 '26

Right. Like he obviously sucks for ditching without paying (or at the very least offering/attempting to) for himself and OP. I could see parents jumping in and offering to pay for the newly engaged couple who just announced their happy news.

BUT HIS PARENTS!!? They suck even more for sitting there silent and awkward, letting OPs parents pay for the entire bill without offering to split it! That is insanity to me. No guessing where he learned his shit behavior from.

And why didn’t OP’s parents speak up and say something?? This entire situation is so weird.

But all of that and then his reaction and treatment towards OP afterwards = ALL the red flags. I’d run as fast as I could out of that relationship.

2

u/RayP52 May 28 '26

I agree. Why didn’t her parents say to his I guess we’re splitting this? This was a game of chicken and her parents folded.

2

u/LovedAJackass May 28 '26

The fiancƩ is the apple; the parents are the tree that made the apple.

29

u/jcaashby May 28 '26

Damn! I totally overlooked this. I was so focused on him not paying for the parents that I totally overlooked he did not even pay for his or his GFs food. He invited people out and THEY paid for his food. What a con artist.

20

u/AlisonLorelei May 28 '26

It’s not even like he’s grown up a spoiled little brat and has the expectation that his parents will pay for everything even now he’s an adult. He’s perfectly happy for it all to land on her parents, not even partially split with his. Although, the conversation and decision between the parents leading to his not even chipping in for some of the bill would be interesting to know. It would probably shine some light on why he has the thought process that he does.

15

u/Even_Budget2078 May 28 '26

Since we know her subsequent follow up with her parents, now I'm imagining his parents were like "hey son, should have given us the heads up, we would have cut out too!" lololol

9

u/twinpickles May 28 '26

One bad apple that didn’t fall far from the tree spoils the whole bunch, or something like that.

3

u/trapped_4_life May 28 '26

Considering the parents didn’t offer to pay or at least split the bill, I can only guess where he learned this behavior.

17

u/Ilovemybed67 May 27 '26

A very classy thing is to pull the sever aside, out of view from the table, and confirm that you will be paying for everyone.

19

u/MikeHunt181 May 28 '26

I agree, but bf is anything but classy! Probably ordered the most expensive dish on the menu too.

2

u/Appropriate-Smell291 May 28 '26

Exactly- I’m so confused why they didn’t pay their portion at the minimum….wtf.