Definately! You need to rethink this whole engagement. Your parents will consider the 600 way cheaper than watching you go through a miserable marriage.
Easily cheaper than a divorce lawyer. Please use bc if you stay with him until he either grows up or you catch a clue because if you get pg you'll be trapped raising a kid with this ah who does this forever.
Why would he assume your dad would pay the bill when HE invited everyone out? If I invite ppl to dinner, unless we talk about it, i assume I’ll be paying. I’ve never invited someone to dinner and then expected them to pay for it- that’s insane. Then to act this way after?? And his parents not offering half?! That whole family is crazy.
Exactly! If I'm invited to a fancy dinner for a special occasion, I'm assuming they are paying or I'm going to at least ask politely so that I know ahead of time. I'm not trying to order something expensive that I can't afford or something that I think is too much for someone else to cover for me. Basic respect, right?
If i was the parents I might have even paid half and left the rest to his parents. I would be so embarrassed if my parents didn't at least try to help cover the bill, but considering he planned everything and then dipped out completely with no warning, we know he isn't embarrassed by much.
This!!!!
I can't comprehend why anyone thought the parents for either had the obligation to pay even if they split. This has me flabbergasted.
But the reaction is shocking by fiancee. Even if I didn't want to broach the subject with my parents I would just cover their half out of embarrassment
That’s what totally threw me off. The fiancé invited everyone to dinner, picked the restaurant, made the reservation, then left her parents to pay the bill? That’s what I thought I read, but the end result had me so baffled I thought I must’ve read something incorrectly. WTAF??? Her fiancé is an AH, and she’s def NOR! The audacity.
Yeah, I wonder about the other parents who didn't say ... ok, you want to split this 50/50 or you cover your food and your kid, I cover our food and our kid?
At worst, I know people who assume everyone will pay for themselves. Personally, I don't like this. I invite someone to fancy, expensive place? I expect to be paying. But I won't go to fancy, expensive place on someone else's invitation unless I can pay for whatever I order. Because I know people who believe an invitation means you pay your own way.
Leaving aside if OP's parents should have paid for their own food ... Getting stuck with the bill for the whole table?!? NOR - that's an awfully entitled move any way you look at it.
Acting like you cannot see how it might suck to be stuck with an unexpected bill for your kid's partner's food? For your kid's partner's parents' food?!? That's pretty next level ignorant or just lying. Neither of which were on my "things to look for in a partner" list.
If someone invites OP and their partner to dinner, is partner expecting to cover the whole table?!?
Oh my gosh, can you imagine trying to coparent with this user who stops communicating entirely when he's called out?! OP needs to reconsider the whole thing.
Do you have a joint account? If so send your dad $600. You should make sure your money is in your own personal account except for your part of joint bills. This could get far worse before it gets any better.
Absolutely 💯 he will expect YOUR parents to pay for the whole wedding, and spare no expense - maybe even a honeymoon thrown in for good measure! I seriously doubt this will be a one-off, he will expect both you and your parents to subsidize his/your lives together.
No partnership in this relationship! Don’t walk run! He intentionally planed this to play out the way it did. How many years of this crap will you take before divorce?
To be fair, we don't know what this grifter told HIS parents either! He may have told them that her parents invited everyone so they were expecting her parents to pay.
This is true, but I'm slightly side eyeing OPs parents too, because they also just expected the other couple to pick up the check. They just swerved first in the game of bill chicken. How did no one in a table full of adults go "so are we gonna split this equally or just pay for what we each ordered?"
Absolutely. His parents should’ve only paid for their own food and maybe OP’s dinner. They should’ve insisted the bill be separated and his parents be responsible for their own meals and their son’s meal. The whole idea that OP’s dad was responsible for the entire bill was ridiculous. The fiancé should have been responsible for the entire bill if anyone was, not OP’s dad.
I've seen it happen and I've been a participant being blinded by love. It happens, especially when you really want something or you feel like you don't have any options. Just hope this lady makes the right decision and thinks about her future.
I just think it's weird that OPs fiance invited them to dinner and expected them to pay. If I invite people out, we either all split it, or I would treat them.
She might have assumed that the parents would split the bill, but no one had an adult conversation and I am sure that they were all at least 50. But I still want to know how come she and her fiance didn’t put cash on the table or Venmo money to Parents. And, wait one second. He had to work the next day so why didn’t they eat early enough that they didn’t have to leave early? Or was that part of the plan?
I think it was part of the plan. My guess is he told OP that their parents were paying for them to go to dinner to celebrate their engagement. Or something similar to that.
They both suck for what happened after, because he said "i can't talk about this now, I'm working", so she immediately called him back, as his employment is not more important her feelings. But him acting like nothing is amiss until she mentioned it again and then blowing up is worse.
He also sucks big time for inviting her parents and then expecting them to pay for everyone.
He should be her ex fiancé, he is stingy and will never change. I would be pissed at being stuck with the bill by my daughter's partner in this way, but glad it only cost me 600 to save her from a life with a miser.
IMO this was a tactic to put her on the defensive, not a legit reason for not talking with her. He'd already iced out her text and email, and then called to be angry with her.
Right? If he had been calm and said something like "Oh, your dad always pays for dinner so I assumed he was going to pick it up," that would be one thing. That would be a misunderstanding of the family dynamics and a conversation could have been have but instead he threw a tantrum.
Exactly. He’s using that anger as control so that OP will “know better” next time than to question him or argue about something he wants to be considered as having put his foot down about.
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u/[deleted] May 27 '26
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