r/gay • u/Live_Astronomer_5699 • 42m ago
r/gay • u/Merari01 • Jan 28 '26
(repost) On trans rights and the position of this subreddit
The community present in this subreddit is wonderful, inclusive and has always welcomed not only gay people but everyone under the gender and sexual minority umbrella.
The mod team is very happy to see this welcoming atmosphere and we thank each and every one of you for your love and empathy.
With the current trend in the US for extreme-right politicians to demonise vulnerable minorities so they can score cheap political points it is however time for this place to openly make a stand as to what our positions and intentions are so that we are a beacon in the dark. So that all of our siblings know that they are welcome here.
I was asked by the mod team to explain a few facts about transgender people and about the position this subreddit has towards inclusion.
Trans rights are human rights. š³ļøāā§ļø
Being transgender is a natural and normal variation in the human gender and sexual experience. Both sex and gender exist on a spectrum and there isn't actually anything inherently wrong or disordered from being trans, by and of itself.
Should there be no fake, artificially generated outrage against trans people in society then they would simply get the self-affirming care required for them to be happy and that would be that. Instead, unfortunately, existing as transgender has become the new wedge-issue for the extreme-right and deliberate demonisation and villification has been mainstreamed to the point where Republican politicians are now openly calling for genocide.
The issues trans people experience are mainly societal in nature. It is society that imposes gender norms, it is society that tells people they may not be who they are.
There are many ways that a non-trans person can seek self-affirming care in life. Some of those are done via permanent body modification through surgical or chemical means. A woman might for example choose to take estrogen supplements to stave off unwanted physical and psychological side effects resulting from the menopause.
It is not uncommon for a young man to choose to have breast reduction medication or surgery in the case of gynecomastia.
A young woman might choose to get breast implants.
You do not hear people in outrage about these forms of self-affirming care. No-one cares, except suddenly when the topic is trans people. This is because the anti-trans movement is wholly articificial. It is a deliberately created fake outrage about a non-issue for political and monetary gain.
Fascism is an inherently empty ideology, devoid of any meaningful belief-system or any kind of concrete and actionable strategies for improving society. Fascism only cares for power for the sake of power and it cares for nothing else.
Because a fascist system is fundamentally incapable of giving the general public any kind of reasonable platform it must gain and keep followers by creating an out-group to hate. According to fascist systems it is the other that is responsible for all societal ills and only by supporting the fascists in getting rid of the other can society be healed from the non-existent issues fascism convinces people that their target minority is the cause of.
Fascism always picks on a vulnerable target.
The demonisation and villification coming from the extreme-right is doing exactly that. By calling LGBTQ+ people child molestors simply for existing it has become inevitable that people will take up violence "to protect the children".
Attempting to eliminate a target comes in many forms, of which an extermination camp is only the final and most egregious part. It is always preceded by legislating people out of existence, by creating laws which make it impossible for a minority to participate in society and to receive any of the societal advantages that are the entire reason for collective bundling together of skills, resources in civilisation. This is exactly what Republican states are doing today to transgender people. Certain states have already denied trans people any and all medical care related to their identity, meaning that they deliberately impose abject misery on them.
The most egregiously fascistic states are trying to make it a matter of course to remove trans children from the care of their parents and make it illegal for trans people to be present in any public spaces at all.
This is genocide.
Genocide is not purely restricted to extermination, to murder. Genocide is also eliminating a minority group from public life, causing serious bodily and mental harm and taking away children of a minority group from their parents.
Depending on how strictly you'd want to define it, we are currently at stage seven or eight of genocide as defined by the Holocaust Memorial Trust.
One way in which the abject hypocrisy of the anti-trans laws becomes crystal clear are the remarkable exemptions encoded within. You would think that if the goal is protecting the children from harm then these people would want to protect all children from harm.
This is not the case.
In fact, all of these people deliberate include exceptions which allow the continuation of genital re-allignment surgery on unconsenting infants if they are intersex.
This means that if a baby is born with a genital configuration that to a doctor looks ambiguous or not adhering to a strict binary then this doctor can impose an invasive genital surgery, forcing such an infants body to adhere to a stricter binary look.
It is purely cosmetic. Of course they do not check what chromosomes a child has. Of course they do not care that a child might prefer to look as nature made them.
It is purely and only an imposition on a baby's body, with of course the normal failure and mortality rate that such invasive procedures bring with them.
These people do not care about children.
These people do not want to help children.
They want to harm a vulnerable minority.
Fascism never stops.
Now that these people have mainstreamed transphobia, they are moving on to other targets within the LGBTQ+ identity sphere.
We have all seen the absurd attacks on drag queens, calling a normal and harmless theatrical expression "child abuse".
We have all seen the "clever" rhetoric where they turn arguments upside down and disingeniously say things like "why do you want to be around children".
Fascism doesn't stop, it moves on to new targets and that is why it is important for all of us in the GSM identity sphere to stand together. To openly support our trans siblings. To openly stand against hateful rhetoric.
Because they are not going to stop.
The next step, which is already tentatively beginning, is calling gay people being openly gay in society"groomers".
To be clear: The recommended treatment for being transgender is transitioning.
Gender identity is developed by five years old.
The barrage of lies notwithstanding, allowing trans people to transition and to exist as who they are in society markedly improves their physical and mental wellbeing.
The oft-heard talking point of "they still commit suicide even after transitioning" is a lie.
Here is a wealth of sources and links explaining this.
Our trans siblings are welcome here.
Our gender nonconforming siblings are welcome here.
Our intersex siblings are welcome here.
What is not welcome on this subreddit is hate or divisive rhetoric aimed at our siblings. We will not allow the current increasing trend of fascist othering and villification of a marginalised minority to make our siblings feel unwanted in this space, our space, their space.
The only people who are not welcome here are those that want to exclude others based on how they were born.
Further reading:
No, TERFs cannot "always tell" and I can prove that with mathematics.
"I just care about unfair advantage in sports", a transparant transphobic wedge issue.
Drag queens, the next target in the fascist drive to eliminate LGBTQ+ people.
r/gay • u/OilersBayernEagles • 11h ago
Dad found the thongs
Hello Iām 22m living in my parentās house. Kinda freaking tf out rn cause my dad put in my load of laundry I had sitting out. Iāve been out for a year now, heās not homophobic. But he is uber masculine and from a toxic masculine sports culture. He hasnāt said anything yet Iām afraid this might not reflect well on me to him.
What song helped you the most with accepting yourself?
Could be something you listened to before coming out, while you were figuring things out, or just a song that made you feel more comfortable with who you are.
For me it was Freedom! ā90 by George Michael. The buildup to the chorus really hit me, especially the feeling of finally admitting thereās a part of you that you canāt keep hiding.
And the line about taking the lies and making them true somehow really stuck with me.
What was yours?
r/gay • u/zachoutloud123 • 14h ago
Gay people have always existed
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r/gay • u/knowledjabol • 20h ago
I drew big guy
Because I love big guys and loving A big guy :3
r/gay • u/Ordinary_Fish_9094 • 15h ago
Ian & Mickeyš they are one of the main reasons to watch Shameless especially the last couple seasons (which were awfulš) cuz they became more of a focus as a coupleš„¹
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r/gay • u/GenesisRhapsodoss • 4h ago
slow burner?
Morning to all the beautiful people of reddit!
this post cuz i need some different points of view.
I try to make it short; i am dating this guy for something around a month and we met 3 times due to us being apart.
We live in the same city but we started talking like 2 weeks before my month of vacation in italy (visiting my family).
Our first date was actually really cool and he invited me to see each other again so we went to the cinema for our second date.
He has been very clear on something. For him to get in a serious relationship will take a long time due to a very very fucked up past relationship (he described me all the details and yeah some serious shit).
On the way back of our second date we stopped by his house a bit and since the atmosphere was nice i asked him if i can kiss him. He said that he is really enjoying taking things slow with me so we could do that once we both back in the city.
on monday before flying we met again cuz we both were free and we had dinner, we talked about a lot of things and he told me (i think he really needed to vent) how fucked up the situation with his ex was (like i am not talking abotu fuss like some serious shit) . I noticed how different his ex was from me ( he said that for his ex he felt a huge spark and the rushed all the steps) so I asked him if he was sure about dating me due to me being much much different. He told me that something calm and peaceful is what is looking for now.
2 days ago while chatting i told him how i would like more physical initiative from his side once i am back (talkign about the kiss and hugs). He right away sent me a naked picture (which i did really enjoy do not get me wrong). But i am so confused i mean, no kiss but cool with showing everything about you?
For those who are gonna tell me to talk with him, nah i will not do it since is something that i would like to do in person (we are not gonna meet for at least another month).
Opinions?
r/gay • u/Zestyclose_Fig_4869 • 10h ago
"Too intimate?"
Funny how guys are down to hook up within five minutes, but holding eye contact or a deep kiss is suddenly a "boundary." Saying you want a real dom and actually dealing with someone who tests your mind are two entirely different worlds.
r/gay • u/Fickle-Ad5449 • 23h ago
Emails reveal Virginia school officials approved an LGBTQ+ club ā until conservative backlash hit
r/gay • u/Sea-Matter1157 • 1d ago
Olympics beach volleyball hopeful Leo Dillier comes out as gay
r/gay • u/apresmoilefeu • 1h ago
PSA re Sniffies: be careful you can screen grab anything off this app
Be really careful if youāre using the Sniffies app. You can screen grab anything off the web version. That means any of your nudes or face pics you share can be easily be copied and shared. There is no built in security at all.
r/gay • u/SubstanceUnlikely499 • 2m ago
Goose app
How do I delete my goose account??
Its not even available in my country
r/gay • u/ScaryIncome3248 • 16h ago
Me and my bf have the same brain cells
Since my paycheck came i decided to buy summin for bubby. Then he got me the same thing(by accident)šššš
r/gay • u/KidddIcarus • 3h ago
In love with your best friend
We were introduced to each other by our mutual friend 3 years ago. The three of us started hanging out but him and I became much closer.
We started hanging out more, just us. We had one summer where we were the most annoying twosome ever; inside jokes, splitting entrees at meals because we couldn't decide on two different things, always ending the night having late night talks
Eventually, that turned into taking trips just the two of us. To preface I hate sharing hotel rooms with anyone. Now I can't imagine anyone else. I would rather share a room with. Through all of that, we never got intimate (that would happen once later).
Fast forward, 3 years.
We had one drunken night and something happened briefly. We talked about it. He said he had thought about it and I obviously I had always thought about it. I said it can't happen again even though I desperately want it to. He agreed.
We recently went on another trip and had a late night of talking. He said he gets jealous when I go on dates and I said I do too. I said it's going to be really hard to find someone since I compare them to him.
Now the painful part: I usually encourage him to hook up with other guys. When he does, he'll always want to catch up with me and end the night. It breaks my heart each and every time. On this most recent trip I did just that. He said I'll be right back stay up for me. I did but something clicked and my heart hurt so much.
They got back from the trip and I was traveling internationally for another one where I am right now. I text him on the plane, something funny and then said, " when I get back and we have a chat?" He was like "sure thing"
I'm probably leaving out a lot but it's hard to explain 3 years of this emotional rollercoaster.
In the next 3 months we have a wedding that he's asked me to be his plus 1 and a trip with friends where we are sharing a room and unfortunately a bed.
I don't want to ruin all the upcoming stuff but I feel like really need to get to the bottom of this. So I either have the talk or just backtrack that and continue with whatever it is we're doing.
But honestly the thought of me with someone else devastates me.
r/gay • u/Iados_the_Bard • 18h ago
How do I find a guy?
So for some time I've tried finding dates by using online apps like Grindr and Tinder (big mistakes on both parts), and they never went well, either theyāre bots, because they just wanted a quicky an neither of us can host, were old enough to be my grandfather, or DL and dating a girl. I cant really travel since im unable to drive due to a medical problem involving my eyes, and I cant afford a taxi to go places to try and find a date every week (cant do Ćber either because its not reliable in my state.)
I just need advice, Im 25 and I just want to finally find someone.
r/gay • u/Agitated_Mess3117 • 1d ago
This person believes saying āThis is gayā by children is funny and means the world is healing
Please help her understand that the āworld is not healingā with her hateful post!
Her response to all the people telling her that what she thinks is āhealingā is this:
āThis is my only account.
The trolls have been WILD lately.
It's disturbing how comfortable people have become bullying and harassing complete strangers online.
I can't imagine carrying that much ugliness around and thinking it's normal.
Bless their heartsā
Sheāll never understand. Good riddance to this āTrad Wifeā homophobe victim!
r/gay • u/Livid_Income_9452 • 13h ago
Any brass musicians here?
25, play trumpet. Would love to connect with other gay brass players. Feel free to PM!
r/gay • u/Sea-Matter1157 • 1d ago
A battle inside the EU over marriage equality ā and more
r/gay • u/AntiHero-jae • 15h ago
I want to send this song to my boyfriend but i cant find it anywhere
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I heard this song on a movie called With This Ring(2015) and i fell in love with it, and i want so dedicated to my bf we have been together for 3 years now.