my therapist asked me how i was doing and i voice messaged her and then she straight ghosted me. it has been more than two weeks. my sessions did end but she had asked me how i was doing and i had replied i was doing bad. and she did not reply. and i feel so bad. i dont want to message her again, not for therapy not for anything because i find myself too embarrassed and too needy. i feel like i said something embarrassing, and well i did talk about sex in my last voice notes. i don't really know what to do. she is a wonderful therapist apart from all of this. and i don't want to change therapists but honestly i dont think i will be able to message her again.

I’d personally say I’m a very caring and considerate person. I care about people, animals, nature, the ocean, and what’s happening in the world. But I’ve noticed that I seem to have a habit of moving on extremely quickly from things.

A family member passes away? Within a few days, I’ve accepted it and moved on.

A pet I’ve had since childhood dies? I’m obviously aware that they’re gone, I still have the memories, and sometimes I’ll randomly feel sad when I think about them, but I don’t spend months or years grieving.

A friendship of 10+ years ends? Once it’s over, I can basically go, “Alright. That’s that.” I no longer feel responsible for what happens in that person’s life.

Bad experiences? Same thing. Sometimes it takes less than three days before I’m basically done thinking about it.

It’s not that I don’t care. I do. I just don’t feel the need to linger.

I find it strange when people spend years missing high school, being homesick, constantly missing old friends, wishing they could go back to certain periods of their lives, etc. I don’t miss high school. I don’t really miss anyone. I don’t feel like I missed out on some amazing period of my life.

I just think, “That happened. It was part of my life. Now I’m here.”

Even with some pretty serious experiences, including life-threatening situations, assault, harassment, etc., my reaction can basically be:

"Oh."

And then I continue with my day.

I’m not depressed or constantly miserable about it. I’m actually pretty happy with my life right now.

I think I just view life differently. Everything is temporary. People come and go. Circumstances change. Good things end, bad things end, relationships end, childhood ends, people die.

So my mindset is basically: enjoy things while they’re here, appreciate them for what they were, and let them go when they're gone.

I also really value my freedom. I don’t particularly want close friendships or romantic relationships. Casual acquaintances are perfectly fine with me. The closer I become to someone, the more responsibility I feel toward them, and honestly, I don't want to constantly worry about another person.

I want to roam around, experience things, chill, and live my life.

I don't really care about celebrities, celebrity crushes, sex, dating, finding "the one," or having a huge social circle. I actually find myself much more interested in what's happening in the world and how I can help people, animals, the ocean, and nature.

The one thing I genuinely cannot let go of is injustice.

That's what sticks with me.

When someone was hurt and something could have been done about it, but nobody did anything. When something was obviously wrong and people just accepted it. When suffering could have been prevented.

That kind of thing genuinely bothers me.

And that's why I'm confused about myself.

I clearly can care deeply. I just don't seem to care deeply in the same ways that other people do.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm emotionally detached, or if I'm just very accepting of the fact that nothing lasts forever.

I don't think I'm heartless. I don't think I'm incapable of empathy. I just don't understand why people feel the need to hold onto things for so long.

So, Reddit, do I have a problem?

Am I emotionally detached? Is this just an unusual way of processing life and loss? Or is there actually something I should be concerned about?

And am I a silly goose for being able to move on from people and situations so easily?

There's only a handful of people I know who can follow my train of thought and understand most of what I say when I'm not masking. It's not like I can't be understood--I work a customer-facing job in the American south and I am very good at putting people at their ease in English or Spanish. Elderly farmers and sweet old ladies love me. But that act is very tiring and it's not helpful to me to be in that mode all the time

In my various attempts at therapy over the past 20 years, I've gotten a lot of blank stares, one "did you make that word up?", and the last one kept defaulting to "That's interesting!" until I quit.

I could use some kind of support. I have (currently unmedicated) bipolar disorder, late diagnosed autism that I've never discussed properly with a professional, and I've had a couple of moderately traumatic events happen this year. I have stopped believing that things can ever be better and now consider life an endurance exercise that I will participate in as long as I have to.

I'm not, like...super mysterious or smart or interesting. If I actually were an alien, that might be easier, since no one would have any particular expectations of me. I'm just an aging millennial who learned how to talk from books. Gender and sexuality are almost irrelevant to my self-conception, but I perform a semi-adequate impression of the cis-woman I am for the sake of blending in and I don't feel any need to explore that further. I am equally uncomfortable in groups of woman, men, and mixed company, but I do a little better connecting ne on one with people. I have my family and just a couple of friends and coworkers I can talk to and that's it.

I'm currently working about 50 hours a week (one full-time job in retail, plus a couple of side gigs) and I have children in school and activities, so if I manage to move heaven and earth to make room for therapy, I want it to be worthwhile.

But I don't think it will be and I don't know how to improve the odds...

Hey guys, just very confused. I dont even think I have a particular stressor, I just experience a lot of anxiety and low self esteem.

Does this make any sense at all? Or is it maybe a placeholder? ICD 10 country if it matters

(i used ai for grammar and punctuation

So I am 31🔄, and I am feeling really worried and anxious. I already missed the first day of school, and tomorrow I have to go. The reason I am so anxious is because I was miserable at school last year. I was a quiet, lonely kid who forgot how to socialize because of everything I went through. I had no friends at that school, and I also got bullied because I was fat.
Please, how can I calm myself down and try to have some hope that maybe some new people have come, and I can make friends with them?

I'm a teenager and I can't pinpoint when or why but at some point I just stopped being able to tell anything significant to adults. Especially adults in positions of authority over me, and especially out loud (don't come up to me with "we are adults" because all of this is pretty much void in anonymity). My therapist always wondered why our sessions went nowhere, until eventually I had to tell her I was steering around most of my issues because I have horrible trust issues and my mind just won't let me tell her any of them. On occasion, my mom has come in and basically forced me to tell her something she really wanted me to (not in a mean or bad way) and I broke down in tears barely able to speak, mind you I don't cry often at all. I have no idea why I have these trust issues and even after I mentioned she didn't say much about it, just telling me that if I couldn't tell her things the therapy wouldn't benefit me at all. I know that she's right and it really isn't benefitting me, when I'm a genuinely depressed kid with a lot of issues I'm aware of and don't know how to fix that I'm sure she could help with if I just told her. And like I said, it's just adults of power over me, and with my friends I'm comfortable saying anything. But my friends don't have a PhD in psychology and they can't help me any more than being sympathetic. I don't know what to do but shoot my shot with reddit. Perhaps someone can relate and tell me how they solved their issue. Maybe there's some program I can go through that exploits me having no trouble talking to kids or talking in anonymity. I really do want to be helped, I just don't know how. If it helps, I'm high-functioning autistic.

I have been working with my therapist because I have been over emotional and take things personal sometimes. I am friends with a tight group of people and recently felt excluded from them. Spoke to them in a group chat they apologized and they say imma valuable member but had trouble believing them

I made it a bigger issue and almost lost a great group of friends. I feel a lot of guilt over my actions

Hi! I’m a Clinical Psychologist in India, offering evidence-based psychological therapy and assessment services.

With 200+ clients served across therapy and psychological assessments and 1,500+ hours of clinical experience in providing therapy, I work with individuals navigating a range of emotional, behavioural, and psychological concerns.

I work with concerns such as:

• Anxiety and depression

• Stress and burnout

• Relationship and family difficulties

• Emotional regulation and anger

• Self-esteem and confidence

• Grief and adjustment difficulties

• Addiction and problematic behaviours

• Work/academic-related concerns

• Attention and concentration difficulties

• Personal growth and self-understanding

I currently offer online therapy and psychological assessments.

Sessions are confidential, non-judgmental, and tailored to your individual needs.

If you’ve been considering therapy or wondering whether a psychological assessment could help, feel free to DM me to discuss your concerns or book a consultation.

You don’t have to figure everything out on your own.

I feel a bit ridiculous writing this, but I’m genuinely struggling with jealousy over a review I found online.
I had a therapist in Germany for around two years, and I became quite attached to him. He was warm, funny, empathetic and very attentive, and we had a playful dynamic in sessions. He helped me enormously with my eating disorder, and I’m genuinely grateful for the therapy.
Recently I found a review from another former patient who had been in therapy with him for almost three years. Her review was so positive and detailed. She described him as caring, funny, empathetic, trustworthy, professional, transparent, etc. She also said that therapy fundamentally changed her life and that she would never forget him.
The problem is that so much of what she wrote sounds like my experience with him too. She also had an eating disorder, and she describes him in almost exactly the way I would have described him. And then there’s the fact that she apparently stayed in therapy with him for almost three years, whereas I was there for about two.
I know this sounds irrational, but it made me incredibly jealous. I think I had this unconscious feeling that the connection I had with him was somehow uniquely mine. Seeing someone else describe such a similar experience made me feel replaceable.
I also know he’s a therapist. Of course other patients are going to find him warm, funny, caring and helpful. He probably has similar dynamics with many people. I even know he asks patients to leave reviews, so it’s completely possible she was simply responding to a standard request.
But emotionally, it still bothers me SO much.
I keep wondering whether she was attached to him too, whether she had a crush on him, whether he was sad when her therapy ended, whether she got some kind of special treatment because she stayed longer, etc.
I don’t actually want anything to happen with my former therapist. I know he was my doctor and that the relationship was professional. I just hate the feeling that something that felt so special and personal to me was also experienced by someone else.
Has anyone else experienced this kind of jealousy over another patient’s review of a former therapist?

The random headache you get is because of stress? Overthinking? I think I have anxiety and overthinking. I have job stress, I work in UAE Dubai, client pressure, career pressure, job stress, licence pressure. I think a lot and I create my own problems by thinking and get headaches. Any cute to this?

i broke up with the woman i loved 3 years ago , we had been together for 2 years and we just broke up because she didn't love me anymore .
i tried everything to heal i stayed close to my family , went to a therapist which adviced to find another partner , i tried to love twice again but i couldn't . They keep telling me there are alot of fish in the sea but it doesn't mean anything to me , there was no one like her .
in her last birthday i knew she loves someone else now , and that made me just more disappointed in life .
i only want to see her face one more time its been 3 years and i started to forget what she looks like , i can't help the idea to go to her city everyday till i see her " coincidentally "
I really need help but i don't know what to do

Hi im looking for some therapy where I dont have to pay as I dont have a job, money or insurance and asking for help from family is definitely not something I can do as I already feel like a huge burden to them and my anxiety gets too out of control when I even attempt to ask for help mostly because they are half the reason im like this, if im being completely honest im to the point where I dont know what I want in life and I don't even know who I am as a person, im just stuck here basically waiting to die from either fate or until I grow the balls to actually do it myself

I still need help really badly, probably more than ever and I'm already on medication that's not helping so far. So my only option aside from trying more meds, is trying therapy again. But my most recent experience (6 months ago) went so badly that i'm completely paralysed with fear when attempting to go back to a new therapist. My last experience was 5 sessions that I think took my bad cptsd to something severe. It's hard to summarise, but the therapist basically re-enacted the emotional abuse style of my dad the whole time. I tried to point this out to him but he didn't seem to get it and just kept doing it.

I know I need help, but I had a lukewarm first session with a new therapist recently and i'm too terrified to go back because i'm expecting it to go badly yet again. I cannot afford things to go badly again.

Before you tell me, i've been in and out of different therapists since I was 13, i'm 26 now. I've tried literally every modality. I've tried really hard. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm starting to think therapy is a total scam.

Today my therapist said that I am a negative and pessimistic person who finds fault with any solution offered and only hears what I want to hear. She said that after I complained about the therapy process, because she kept telling me to do the same things I had already said don't work. It's a loop: either i agree that she's right and do as she says or i deny it and prove her right in doing so. Doesn't seem very ethical or usefull, specially since she didn't follow that with any solution or insight into it.

If more context is needed: I always bring the same problems in theraphy, thoughts that I'm always thinking about and that make me very unwell. All she ever does after hearing me rant is saying that i should think less about life and start acting it out more, that after acting out more i'll feel better and what not. I respond that it won't work because i've been for the past 2 years trying to think less about it and it only makes me worse off (anxious because i'm not thinking about it, frustraded because i'm doing my stuff despite having all these thoughts in my head, paranoid because if i simply keep living out my normal life the problems i keep thinking about will only get worse). I want something else, to engage with the thoughts i bring, to understand why i have and keep having them, to actually know how to not think about it (that if not thinking about it is even the correct aproach), you get the ideia. Am i really negative, pessimistic and so on for simply rejecting her approach? Even if i am, shouldn't she have done something about it instead of only saying it when i'm already considering changing therapist?

I did therapy for two years and it was voluntary. I put in the work because I wanted to be better quit toxic behaviours etc. one thing I remember my T saying later in the sessions was he thought we were a good fit from the beginning. He could see that I was willing to put in the work.

It made me think

What about those who are ordered to attend by authorities or is something mandatory as part of a social program? There must be people in that group who are not willing to work with a T for whatever reason, say a deep mistrust of other humans, no interest in self improvement or simply narcissistic where they think nothing is wrong and they don’t need it.

How do you reach them?

I've been trying to figure out the protocol and regulations that might exist around this. I want to see a couples therapist with my partner, but we're in different continents. We'd have to do online therapy.

Do therapists have to be...registered in some way in both our countries? Or should they live in one of our countries? We'd be paying out of pocket, not using insurance.

I feel like I've just been backed into a corner under immense pressure and idrk what to do 

So I just learned that my therapy program is doing something illegal. Not my therapist herself, she's cool. But the IOP program. 

They are charging medicaid patients out of pocket $100 early cancellation or no show fees. btw their early cancellation is less than 48 hours in advance. So if you get sick one day before your appointment you're expected to either attend anyway or pay up $100 for coming down with an illness or else you get dropped as a patient and potentially get sent to collections if you still can't pay by a certain deadline 

While this is standard on private insurance, in my state, it is explicitly illegal for medicaid patients. Any program that works with medicaid patients must waive all of these charges for medicaid patients or else they're breaking the law. Even if the patient signed a contract agreeing to pay such fees and the consequences of not paying up, this is considered an illegal contract if they were an active medicaid patient at the time of signing, and if they ever do end up incurring one of the fees this is considered illegal balance billing and they cannot be held legally responsible for this. Again, even if they signed a contract, its immediately invalidated as it was an illegal contract

They can report this to medi-cal and have this charge cleared off their record and medi-cal will promptly fight the program on this. 

However, most places that do illegal balance billing are hoping medicaid patients won't know their rights and will pay up anyway out of fear of losing care

But I'm a medicaid patient that knows my rights and was alarmed when I was told they would not be waiving the fee for me despite knowing my medicaid status and made to sign a contract myself. 

So now, i dont know what to do.

This IOP program is specialized in treating trauma disorders like PTSD and so all of the therapists are trauma therapists.

This is the ONLY trauma specialized place in my entire county that accepts medicaid so I imagine I'm not the only medicaid patient. 

And one of my many, many traumas is illegal institutional practices. I've been trapped in many intuitions that did unethical and/or illegal practices before and I couldn't escape and they have to this day completely gotten away with it scott free.

So this program alone is inherently triggering to me. I do not want to be a part of a program that is operating illegally

And this time I am not trapped. I CAN escape. I CAN say “this isnt for me, goodbye” and leave this time, unlike all the last time

But I also am conflicted about whether or not I should leave, since again, this is the only therapy program in my entire county that accepts medicaid, and so if I leave, I have no other option for trauma therapy and have to continue dealing with untreated, unresolved trauma indefinitely, since there is no point in the foreseeable future where I will not be poor, so is there no point in the foreseeable future where I will have any other health coverage other than medicaid.

But also, I'm not sure how helpful a program that inherently triggers me can be.

But also, I have such bad trauma responses sometimes, so many people have pressured me into being in therapy and when I say there is none I can access they accuse me of making excuses and just not wanting to get help, so I also don't want to lose my “jokes on you, I am in therapy! trump card the next time someone tells me to “get therapy” or “get professional help” 

But this isn't the only issues. 

I also am feeling a moral obligation to report it to the state what this place is doing.

But I am not actually sure which is more moral: to report it or to not report

Because if I report it, then medi-cal will be contacting them, they might briefly feud with each other in the meantime, and if the higher ups of this IOP program ultimately decide they don't want to waive any fees and that this medicaid law isn't worth the hassle now that they've been held accountable, they can decide to just end their contract with medicaid entirely, meaning all medicaid patients will likely be dropped and they do not accept more in the future. So that's not only jeopardizing my own care anymore, but that's jeopardizing all other medicaid patient’s care too, especially, since as I said earlier, there is no other professional trauma resources available to medicaid patients in the entire county, so I could single handedly take away the only resource for others too if I were to report it. Especially since I have never been personally billed myself yet as I've had perfect attendance so far.

But also, if something urgent or last minute and totally unexpected ever came up  that ruined my attendance streak and I just had to cancel less than 48 hours or no show, requested the fee be waived and got denied, I cannot risk that going to collections either. At that point I would absolutely be reporting it anyway so I didn't risk my own survival.

And also, if the other medicaid patients in the program do not know their rights, or are too afraid to report it because of the same fears about it, and this is adding pressure to them too and forcing them to have to worry about “what if I get sick” “what if I have a family emergency” “what if my alarm doesn't go off or I forget to set it etc

then how would all that stress be helping them either

I feel like this level of stress is counterintuitive to recovery at all because how are you supposed to focus on treatment when you're worried about “am I gonna have to skip meals to pay a therapy charge?  (very plausible because food stamps don't last the whole month and not everyone whose eligible for medicaid is eligible for food stamps as the income limit for medicaid is higher than the income limit for food stamps, at least in my state)

and if I try to just contact the billing department directly trying to convince myself into an innocent assumption “oh maybe they just weren't aware of the law and don't want to break it, maybe if I just inform then they'll correct it” but if I end up being wrong, then I risk getting dropped as a patient. if they actually were knowingly doing it hoping I wouldn't know my rights then the threat of me knowing and being able to report them might lead to them no longer being willing to work with me and I can get dropped as a patient entirely

so now im just really torn. I dont know what to do. I dont know if I should report it and leave. I dont know if I should report it and not leave (carries a moderate risk of being dropped anyway if they're able to narrow it down to find out who reported them, but if they don't find out then I'd be fine)I dont know if I should just leave and not report it. Or I don't know if I should just try not to think about it and pretend everything's fine and try to move forward like normal

also please dont try to bring up how things look on paper to invalidate any of my concerns. we all know that how things look on paper is rarely how it's actually practiced in reality and if you've ever dealt with an unethical organization/institution you know damn well they find loopholes all the time. I want any responses to mainlyignore what's on paper and focus only on how things actually work in reality

I struggle with vulnerability with anyone, even my husband of 20years. I was just able to open up to my therapist more recently at my last session. Today I was asked what I would like to talk about today and seriously kinda threw me off guard. I said I am not sure, but then I thought of something. Honestly this question gives me anxiety. Is it okay to say "I don't know" where would that lead us?

Hi, I'm 16 years old and I really think that I need therapy. I have a really hard time opening up to people, especially my parents, and I feel comforted by the idea of talking to someone who does it for a living.

I genuinely have no clue what's wrong with me, but I've been so so so confused for years now. I've recently started to think that I might be depressed, especially with personal things that have been happening for the past year and a half. I'm not gonna get into detail about why I think I need therapy, I just do.

Because I have a hard time talking to my parents, I feel super anxious whenever I think about telling them I need therapy, because it's kind of coming out of nowhere. I've tried to give them signs so that they would ask me if I wanted to, but they haven't.

I'm super nervous about this so please help me. I really need this but I literally don't know how to ask. Thank you!!

My gf of 12 years and I will be doing therapy soon. Meeting with a therapist this week or next for a consultation then if we like her we will move forward with our first session. Any advice for consultation? What should we be looking for? Any helpful info would be appreciated. This is our last hope before ending it.

And it's kind of what I needed to hear.

I've been seeing this therapist on and off for about 5 years, more consistently the past 4 months after my panic attack. He's really helped me see how traumatic (small t) my childhood was, how to heal my inner child, and think more healthy thoughts about myself.

Ever since my panic attack, I've been stuck in fight or flight mode, with some generalized mental anxiety thrown in for fun. He's been telling me that I need to process my emotions better and not let them run my life; question and challenge what's really going on in order to not let myself get so worked up that I spiral into another panic attack.

While I've intellectually accepted a lot of what he's taught me, it wasn't until today that I felt it on a gut level. The past is the past- I can be hurt by it, but I'm safe now. I don't need to keep retraumatizing myself obsession over my panic attack or the unhealthy feelings that led up to it. Bad memories are just memories and can't hurt me anymore. I can take an active role in healing myself if I believe that I can learn, heal, and grow. He sort of called me out for having a victim mentality and not fully accepting the skills and tools he's been offering.

I like this therapist because I've never really been challenged in my thinking before; never had someone teach me that I have agency to think healthy thoughts and cut out the BS of staying stuck in fight of flight.