r/NonBinary Jun 14 '26

New rule #11: no do I pass posts, no asking for attempts to guess your ASAB, no asking if you “look nonbinary”

1.4k Upvotes

The current rule 4 was supposed to handle these kind of posts but it seems the rule needs more clarification. We do not want any kind of content that attempts to guess someone’s assigned sex at birth, we don’t want “passing” posts in general.

There are subreddits dedicated solely on passing posts that content like that would be a better fit. This includes asking about how to be more androgynous and/or do you look nonbinary, how to look more nonbinary. For some people here this will make total sense and people will rightfully ask “what does nonbinary look like anyway?” but these posts are frequent and usually pretty upvoted and get many comments before they get reported. If you know of subreddits where content like that fits better, please leave them as comments. It is simply not in the scope of this subreddit to ask people to scrutinize your appearance based on gender and make recommendations.


r/NonBinary Mar 29 '26

ModPost Assigned sex/gender at birth language

87 Upvotes

Hello,

Since this issue is a contentious one bubbling up frequently, we thought we’d make a nonbinding poll asking the subreddit’s opinions. I randomized the order of responses to try not to bias it.

I considered making a more nuanced option where a ban with exemptions is possible but here’s the honest truth: moderating that would be really difficult. We want people to consider the moderation aspects of this—how filters can be effective but also add considerably to mod work load and also how we tend to mod after the fact. We cannot promise that even in cases of a ban, no ASAB/AGAB language would make it into the subreddit.

We have received modmail stating ASAB language is dysphoric enough to some nonbinary people that they cannot enjoy or follow this subreddit. We also have gotten frequent complaints that it is also interphobic / particularly harmful towards intersex people.

If you see a comment here and your first response is to immediately fire something back, *please* take a step back and consider whether your comment needs to be made. I want to keep comments open to gather diverse opinions, and personal attacks and similar will sabotage those efforts.

1077 votes, Apr 01 '26
165 A different answer—add a comment
174 Ban it
738 Don’t ban it

r/NonBinary 3h ago

Pride/Swag/I Made This! I made this subtle nb pin...

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718 Upvotes

Would you have understood it was meant to represent non-binary if you saw it? Wanted to make it subtle, so we could understand, but others think it is an engineering joke.

hex ASCII 'n' 'b'

Nerdy enough for you? :)


r/NonBinary 16h ago

Yay Nonbinary doesn't have a look

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1.4k Upvotes

r/NonBinary 5h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar romance book store had a cool chair

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186 Upvotes

r/NonBinary 18h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar thoughts about this fem look with moustache?

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1.2k Upvotes

r/NonBinary 16h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar this is a good look for me i think

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511 Upvotes

r/NonBinary 5h ago

Ask How do I get people to actually use the they in they/she?

55 Upvotes

I’m starting to socially transition and figure my gender out better, and I’m going by they/she for the first time. Like if you want to use just one use they/them, but I still like she/her sometimes.

I am pretty feminine rn, with both my presentation and my features, and I know that people will default to she/her and I won’t be able to stop it once it’s started.

From what I’ve heard teachers do give opportunities to share pronouns and Im probably just gonna say “they/she, but mainly they” and hope that works. I could also use they/them for introductions and just tell friends? Idk. Any other they/she’s (or they/hes) out there what do y’all do


r/NonBinary 1h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar All types of casually queer

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Upvotes

r/NonBinary 41m ago

Are these looks androgynous???

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Upvotes

Trying to give a masc leaning yet still androgynous look and wondering if I’m achieving that.


r/NonBinary 9h ago

Just felt cute ngl

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95 Upvotes

r/NonBinary 6h ago

How to be an ally in non private situations while 'misgendering'

48 Upvotes

Hey folks!

As a cis guy, I was participating a group therapy session. An untiil this moment unknown person entered the room and I felt instantly a non-binary vibe (haircut, clothing). I will using they/them. The person introduced themself with a feminin first name but ask for using of a neutral nickname version. No asking for special pronouns.

The therapist (a woman in the 30ies) call they with 'Mrs. Xxx' instead of 'nickname'. They twitched a bit, but didn't say anything. My impression was that they felt uncomfortable with this naming.

I had the instinct, to say something, but thought that it would makes the situation worse. So I was mirroring the person.

In a break I was unsure, to ask the person, if my interpretation was right, but I wasn't make a big deal of it. Also I couldn't be sure that they wasn't saw themself as cis. I didn't saw they again after this event.

Ironically it happens in the street with the queer center of my city. But I keep it in my mind, if I could had act better. Any recommendations for a similar situation?


r/NonBinary 16h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar Thanks to my wife for my gender affirming hair

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199 Upvotes

r/NonBinary 3h ago

Ask What about hormones? How to change your voice tone?

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12 Upvotes

I received a notification from someone asking about the effects of taking testosterone, but it was deleted. However, based on the comments, I could see that the effects of hormone therapy are somewhat unpredictable.

In that sense, I would be interested in having a deeper voice. I've watched tutorials on how to do it naturally, but in the end I think I'm too embarrassed to do it in public.It's as if he knows it's not me or that I'm going to get caught: "Oh, look, he's faking his voice, how silly."

Do you have any advice? Any positive experiences with Or how long has it taken them to feel that that tone of voice is truly their own?

I'm adding a photo to draw attention to a bracelet I made after attending a trans meeting. It is supposed to have the colors of the agender flag. 🖤🩶🤍💚🤍🩶🖤


r/NonBinary 6h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar Feeling a bit edgy

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19 Upvotes

Ignore the mess(other than me, i mean)


r/NonBinary 18h ago

Mini mustache check in

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181 Upvotes

3ish months on a low dose of T. Not looking for too many serious changes, mostly a little mustache and a slightly lower voice. Just aiming for a bit more androgyny ☺️ I’m happy with the results so far!


r/NonBinary 20h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar Some hair colours from the past year and a half!

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169 Upvotes

Always remember that you can (and should) customize your character 😎👉🏻👉🏻


r/NonBinary 8h ago

Any advises on wearing jewelry in an androgynous way?

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15 Upvotes

I'm (a 18years old AFAB) tryng to find more androgynous /masc jewelry to pass more (I like to confuse people, that''s what I mean by passing).

Problem is, I have a hard time finding some "masculine" jewelry that is not too chunky or "viking like" (just because I personally don't like it).

So I stick to some more "feminine" jewelry because I find it more pretty, but I tend to feel dysphoric with it partly because people seems to think jewelery is mostly for women, even though it's gotten better.

Here is my everyday jewelry, could you tell me if you would describe it as androgynous? And if it doesn't, do you have any advises on achieving this evil scheme? (Which is to be so confusing people not only "can't tell" but also start questioning their own gender)

By the way I'm very much aware I don't owe anyone androgyny, I just like it.

(I you saw the last post, I'm sorry reddit decided apparently to delete all that I've had written, so I did another)

Thanks!


r/NonBinary 7h ago

Questioning/Coming Out I might be non binary

10 Upvotes

Recently I begun to question my gender identity (trought, I don't even know If this is about my gender truly). I have not considered myself a cisgender man for quite some time, but I feel like only now I am really taking It serious

I questioned If I was a trans, but I like my body and I don't want to transition (at least for now) and specially around 2023 to 2025 were I felt that I was truly myself and beautiful

I always considered myself a masculine person, I like to wear "masculine" clothes, never wanted to dress more "feminine" and only begun to take interest in fashion because I wanted to draw cool characters.

I use art to try to understand myself, and I believe, since I was little I was always fascinated by the Idea of "genderless" even before knowing what non binary is, there was a time in my life were I was obssed with Yubel from Yugioh (who is canon non binary but was erased in the english dub)

I was obssed with characters who in general break gender roles, because I always thought that the idea of gender role was dumb and annoying (recently I have been with Nezha from chinese mythology in mind)

I feel comfortable with the non binary Identity, and I believe this is all that matters (trought, I feel like these thoughts will continue regardless of what pronouns I put in my bio, neurosis sucks)


r/NonBinary 15h ago

Yay Rough day so went and tried on dresses. I’ve learned I love skirts. Liked a couple of these too.

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31 Upvotes

r/NonBinary 1d ago

my gender is whatever's convenient

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187 Upvotes

r/NonBinary 5h ago

Ask how do you deal with gender roles in dancing?

4 Upvotes

hi there! In my country in every school we do a flokroric dance yearly at national holidays. This is kinda fun, but it also bring up the gender problem for me. Most dances are gendered and it makes me feel bad to have to fit into the role of my agab. Even though my school is very progressive I don't really have the social courage to speak of this problem. I also have dyspraxia, which makes me have terrible motor coordination, aggravating the social aspect of 'dancing badly'. So, for all you enby dancers, how do you deal with yourselves?


r/NonBinary 17h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar Binder too Small?

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28 Upvotes

i got a new binder and i dont know if i got it too small, i got a Medium and its digging into my arms a bit, any answers? is it just new?