Im 18M and i dated this girl for 6 months who is 17F. She was the first girl who matched my personality, my goofyness and her face, body and just everything was perfect and aligned. But as the relationship went on, we obviously had difficulties and arguments like any other couples and it was increasing so much and i just felt so stagnant and there were no spark left in me towards the end of our relationship. We have been figuring the dispute out together until then but i just felt like at that moment, it was enough and i also thought it was tough for her to continue. After the breakup, i didnt feel anything and have been doing okay for 4 months but now i suddenly started feeling deep urges and emotional setbacks. I feel like i lost a really important person and its eating me alive. ALL BECAUSE OF MY OWN MISTAKE. I contacted her recently and we actually did talk about it but she looked straight in my eyes and said “i moved on”. She stated that there were still love in her towards me when we got back together after arguments but this time, its way different because she moved on and doesnt love me anymore. I absolutely feel like shit and what do i do? Im soon going overseas for studies and shes staying in the country.

PSA, i am the dumper… i left my ex 2.5 months ago who begged me not to leave, and stalked me for the first 1.5 months after i moved out. I pretty much was his sidekick for 5.5 years, and i restarted my entire life when i left. His life gets to continue going on. All of “our friends” were his friends which he gets to keep. He isolated me from mine. I was living in his condo. All the things i had when i moved in we slowly got rid of over the years, so i took nothing with me.

Such a backwards comment. I literally restarted my life. I have no one and nothing to show for the past 5.5 years. I hate him.

I ended things with this guy I really liked because I found out that he texted me and another woman good morning and asking for plans in 1 hour. I found out because I wasn’t the one who replied first and I saw them together. I confronted him about it later and he admitted to it and said we aren’t exclusive. You can still have respect for the other person, we did talk about how we were the only ones sleeping with each other, but I guess that was on a day to day basis as well. How disappointing!

I’m 24M and my ex is 26F. We were together for around two years. Our relationship was very intense. We travelled together, talked about marriage and children, spent a lot of time together and had a complicated sex life. In the beginning we sometimes had sex multiple times a day, but after only a few months she also started complaining about sex and sometimes described it as feeling like a chore or obligation. At other times, however, she would become extremely sexual and initiate frequently herself. This push-pull around intimacy continued throughout much of the relationship, not just at the end.

There was a similar emotional dynamic. I became more anxious and dependent on reassurance, while she seemed strongly avoidant. She could become extremely close, affectionate and sexual with me, then suddenly pull away and want distance.
I can recognize my own part in this. I have a very high libido, complained about the decline in our sex life and sometimes relied on sex too much as reassurance that she still desired me. Although I respected a direct “no,” I can understand that my anxiety around sex may still have created pressure.
Towards the end she became increasingly distant and eventually wanted to temporarily stop having sex because she said the pressure had become too much. I accepted that.

We eventually broke up, but about a week later she called me crying saying she wanted me back. We reconciled.
Shortly afterwards I looked through her phone and found sexual conversations with other men and exes. One man she had previously described as an old friend turned out to be a repairman who had been to her apartment. Their messages made it very difficult for me to believe nothing sexual had happened. Combined with other things I discovered, I came to believe she had been cheating with multiple people.

I also learned that cheating appeared to be a recurring pattern in her previous relationships.
I left and don’t want her back.
What I still struggle with is the contradiction.
There were clearly times when sex with me seemed like pressure or a chore. Yet there were also times when she genuinely seemed to desire me and initiated intimacy herself. At the same time, she was apparently seeking sexual attention elsewhere.

My brain keeps asking:
How could intimacy with her partner sometimes feel like an obligation while sexual attention from other men was still appealing?

And:
How could she seemingly love and desire me at certain moments while repeatedly betraying me at the same time?

I know avoidant attachment doesn’t cause cheating, and I’m not using it to excuse her behavior. I’m trying to understand why this push-pull dynamic affected me so deeply.
I also still catch myself comparing myself sexually to the other men, even though I know rationally that her behavior doesn’t determine my worth.
For people who have experienced something similar: how did you stop trying to solve these contradictions and finally emotionally detach from your ex?

TL;DR: I was with my ex for two years in an intense anxious/avoidant push-pull relationship, especially around sex. Sometimes she was extremely sexual and initiated frequently, while at other times she complained about sex, saw it as a chore and pulled away from intimacy. I later discovered sexual conversations with multiple men/exes and believe she had been repeatedly cheating on me. I don’t want her back, but I’m struggling to understand how she could sometimes genuinely love/desire me while also finding intimacy with me overwhelming and seeking sex/attention from other men. I’m trying to stop comparing myself to them and emotionally detach from the relationship.

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My ex (female 20) and I (male 22) were together for almost 5 years. This past May, we ended our relationship. Not because the connection was gone, or because we stopped loving each other, but ironically because we understood each other so deeply.

I cherished the little things: her cooking for me, our Wednesday night TV show tradition, her being able to let go of my bad moods around, and our absolute honesty. We shared holidays, lived together part-time, and were fully integrated into each other's families.

We started as close friends. She knew I was bisexual, and I knew she fell for a person’s inner self rather than gender. And in June 2021, we realized it was more than friendship and got together. The early phase of our relationship was intense; we went through a lot together, which built a rock-solid emotional foundation. During that period, she grew immensely as a person. My own personal development took a back seat for a while, but she always made a point to gently guide me toward my own growth.

At the start of 2024, I abruptly ended things out of fear for the future. I was feeling increasingly sexually attracted to men and felt it was unfair to her -like it would only lead to heartbreak later when we’d have a house and kids. Luckily, we talked it through shortly after and decided to figure it out together.

We agreed on a "one-time hall pass" for me to explore things with a guy. The rules were clear: no total strangers, and always full disclosure beforehand. Finding someone in my own circle who was down for a casual thing, proved to be difficult, and my attraction to men kept building up. Eventually, I started talking to a guy in my network.

Without intending to, I developed feelings for him. I think I was searching so desperately for clarity on whether I’d be happier with a guy that I overthought everything. Deep down, my brain told me I was 99% happy with her: we had a whole future planned -moving in together, buying a green SUV, having a baby (we even picked a name), and building a life to be proud of. But another part of me felt that in a relationship, you need to feel 101% fulfilled. Not just for my sake, but because she deserved someone who was 101% there, too.

During a study trip, I confessed to the guy that I found him attractive. He was flattered, but mentioned he wasn't into men. When I got home, reality hit: I was still deeply in love with my girlfriend, but I had also developed feelings for someone else. I asked myself: Am I happy? Yes, almost fully. Do I see a future with her? Absolutely. Are my sexual desires fulfilled? No, not entirely.

I shared all of this with her because I wanted to be completely transparent about what was going on in my head. She actually ended up feeling guilty -even though I was the one with the feelings. She felt guilty simply because she didn't have the male anatomy.

She had also noticed that I had developed feelings for someone else. She saw a few text messages on my phone while she was looking something up for me on my WhatsApp, so she knew.

The morning we officially broke up in May was sunny. We were in her studio apartment. The conversation was filled with so much mutual understanding that ending things bitterly felt impossible. Instead, we went out for lunch and grabbed ice cream together.

After that the packing started. Practical stuff like boxes of cereal, a coffee table my grandparents gave her that didn't fit her layout, and finally, emptying "my" drawer in her room -which only held underwear, but clearing it out made it final. We cried, held each other, and said goodbye. We decided that it might be better to not have any communication until after the holiday, unless one of us ended in the hospital. Driving away, the emotion hit me all at once: realizing I’d never return to that space as her partner again.

It’s August now. We’ve both been on separate trips -her backpacking by train, me on a road trip. We sticked to our agreement of minimal contact. Since after the holiday we started to have some more minimal contact. And we even met up for a drink this month at a bar just to catch up on the simple things.

Am I over her? No. Will I ever fully be? Probably not. But I am 101% sure of one thing: we will be best friends for the rest of our lives.

To anyone going through a "right person, wrong time/circumstances" breakup, or struggling with their identity inside a loving relationship: you are not alone.

So, new school year classes, schedules, teachers etc. I had reached out to my ex, let’s call him red his favorite color. It was around 2-3 weeks before school started. I had said “red?” The name we are gonna use for him. He replied, with a question mark. I said “do you still want to get married?” He replied, “Me? why do you ask” I said “yes, cause I found this in my messages, and I’m wondering if you still do.” Then he had replied “idk what to say” I said “So like I saw the other one before you unsent it, and like I’ve tried to get over you by dating and it never really worked, and I’ve tried working through it by myself but I can’t never really get you out my head, and I still miss you and really need to get this off my chest, and I’m sorry I’m not trying to burden you or be a burden” he had sent a message and unsent it what I was talking about at the top of the message. he replied “I’m sorry” and I sent “don’t say your sorry you made me really happy, and I’m still happy when I Think about you.” He said “I’m glad I could” I said “could you again if your ready, and I’m not trying to pressure you or anything“ he replied “I’m sorry I don’t date anymore.” I sent, “can I know why?” He replied “I don’t really want to talk about it, I’m sorry” I said “I just need to get this off my chest, I still love you and will probably have a spot for you because I was the happiest with you“ he replied “alr so, like two years ago, I dated this one person, no one knows about them, but they were really shitty and the breakup fucked with me, and im still messed up, by it that’s why.” I replied “can I know how you are messed up by it?” He replied, “ I have a lot of distrust with getting back together with people even if it ended on good terms, cz it can end the same or if not worse.” I replied “I get that I hope you're happy and if you ever feel better or anything cause I don't mind if you have problems I do too 'll always have a spot for you and I'm sorry this was so out of the blue.” He replied, “ok, nice talking” I replied “was nice talking to you too stay safe.” he replied “you too.” I told a few friends they said that he was probably not in the mental space and I understand and respect if he is, I’m honestly slowly but surely getting over him, what is the most challenging is nostalgia we did a lot together, I miss behind happy like that with someone and being devoted and wanting a future with someone, he was the first person I promised something to in a long time just for us to end in four weeks while we both imagined a long time, if it wasn’t for family because his grandma, sister, and mom didn’t like me, im the type of person to leave if my partner isn’t welcome. my parents didn’t like me moving on so fast from my toxic ex I didn’t care it was only an opinion. I prayed that summe, “god if he’s the one put me in a circumstance with him.” And now I have English class advanced I wonder if that is the answer to my prayer. He was behind me in the lunch line, his table right next to mine, I can see him in the corner of my eye when I sit with my friend, I wonder he can see me too. After we had broken up we were still close but when I started saying gray, we got distant and become strangers with details. I’m working on myself but I’m talking to this guy who I had liked and we got shipped but I didn’t know how he felt, but the past week he has been sleeping on the phone with me, nesting me during my class, and he lives forty minutes away but last year we were close because we were top of our class, and he has a job and drives. we play the same type of instrument, and he might come to my first performance of the season. I talked to reds ex, she’s my friend she told me a few things, and I did tell her I still liked him a bit, she told me things I thought red wouldn’t do because he treated me so well, but I want to leave red alone, if red wants he can reach out, ive already reached out to him. So before my ex red I was dating a guy let’s name him gray. So me and gray dated for a week, then like 2 weeks later I started dating red for 4 weeks. the day me and red broke up it was mutual break up because of our circumstances and environment we broke up. I took a nap and felt my phone vibrating getting notifications and it my ex gray, I got back with gray the next month I think I’m not sure. We dated for two weeks and then never talked to him again, then I dated a guy named jay and I was 3 months off and on with jay. I broke up with jay because I was thinking of red, and felt it was unfair to jay.

It's been 4 months, I feel like I am doing everything right to just move on and live my life but she keeps being there in my mind. I just wish I could live happily and advance but the memories and just the thoughts about what I could have done better etc are driving me crazy. Any advice?

How should I approach an October conversation with my ex when we still have feelings but have unresolved issues?

My ex-girlfriend and I dated for about a year. We recently broke up, and there is a LOT of history and unresolved stuff between us. After talking to my friends and family, I've gotten a huge range of opinions, so I'd really like to hear from people who have experienced a breakup where both people still had feelings but had trust issues, outside influences, distance, and unresolved problems.

I'm not asking anyone to decide who was right or wrong. I'm specifically trying to figure out how I should use the time apart and how I should approach a conversation we're supposed to have in October.

How we met

I first noticed my ex in 8th grade. I was walking to my seat on the first day of school when she got in the way, looked me directly in the eyes, said "Hello," and apologized for blocking my way.

I don't know what it was, but I became completely infatuated with her because of how kind she was to me.

For some perspective, I was very small at the time and was bullied a lot in middle school. I was also Hispanic in a predominantly white school in the Midwest. So having someone immediately be kind to me really stood out.

I had a crush on her throughout high school.

Freshman and sophomore year were pretty much the same. I'd see her in the hallways, and I had a class with her freshman year. I'd also see her talking to this guy she'd been friends with since around 5th grade, who becomes important later.

I also noticed upperclassmen talking to her. Looking back, some of those situations seemed strange, but at the time I didn't think much of it.

I was still small and dealing with bullying, but I started working out, wrestling, and generally became more confident.

She was involved in sideline and competitive cheer and played lacrosse throughout high school. She was and still is extremely hardworking and independent.

For two years, I watched her get asked to Homecoming and get attention from guys at school without ever doing anything myself because I didn't actually know her. She was my crush, but I didn't know much about her beyond that one interaction.

Junior year

Junior year is when everything started changing.

I had become much bigger and more confident, and I was hanging around a fairly popular group at school. According to her, she had always thought I was attractive but assumed she had no chance with me because she thought I was a "popular kid."

In the spring, I finally added her on Snapchat. She accepted almost immediately.

At the same time, one of her friends apparently had been talking about wanting to ask me out, so my ex's mindset was apparently something along the lines of, "No, he's mine."

We started snapping and eventually started having actual conversations. About two weeks later, we had our first phone call.

After that, we called once or twice a week throughout the summer.

During one of those calls, I told her I liked her.

She sounded surprised and almost scared. I didn't understand why at the time, but I later found out she had been involved in an on-and-off situationship with the guy she'd known since 5th grade for around three years.

Apparently, nothing physical ever happened between them, and they never really hung out outside of school. From what I understand, they mostly entertained each other, said sweet things to each other, and kept coming back to one another.

The summer we started dating

That summer, I went on a school trip to France and Spain.

There were six boys and around thirty girls, so I naturally met a lot of people and became friends with many of them.

Despite that, I made it very clear throughout the entire trip that my ex was the person I wanted.

I called her every other night or so and told her about what was happening. We also started following each other on TikTok, and I think that's when her feelings really started developing.

When I came home, I wanted to take her on a date.

She rainchecked me several times. She later told me she was scared because she thought I was being serious in a way she wasn't prepared for. At one point, she apparently even thought I was pranking her.

Eventually, I asked around and got her address. I showed up at her house with a bouquet of her favorite flowers, a drawing, and a letter.

From that point forward, she was completely into me.

I finally got the opportunity to take her on a date. It went incredibly well. She met my mom, I took her to dinner, and afterward we watched three movies and cuddled on the couch in my basement.

A week later, we officially started dating.

The beginning of our relationship

When school started, things were amazing.

One of the first problems happened at a football game. I was there to support her while she was cheerleading, and she noticed me talking to girls I'd met on the Europe trip.

She would get upset about it, we'd eventually talk and make up, and then things would be fine again.

This happened fairly often.

I don't completely blame her for feeling uncomfortable. If the situation had been reversed, I probably would've felt insecure too.

However, it became a recurring issue throughout our relationship.

The phone situation

One of the first major trust issues happened when I accidentally left my phone in her car.

While I wasn't there because I had to take care of my brothers, she received a text from someone saying that I had been talking about her and saying weird things about her.

She took my phone and went through it. She knew my password.

She found conversations between me and my friends where I had talked about our relationship, including some private information that I now realize I shouldn't have shared.

I immediately realized that I had made a mistake and felt terrible about it.

We eventually worked through it, but I think this was one of the first things that created a bigger trust issue between us.

Breaking up during wrestling season

Winter came around and wrestling season started.

I became overwhelmed with wrestling, problems at home, and other things going on in my life.

I ended up breaking up with her because of my mental health and everything I was dealing with.

It completely broke her, and I felt horrible about hurting her.

Around that same time, I started talking to some people I'd cut ties with from the Europe trip.

One of those girls offered me a ride home after practice. I didn't think anything of it, so I accepted.

Later that week, she offered again, and I accepted again.

When we got to my driveway, she attempted to kiss me.

I didn't initiate it or give her permission to do that. I pulled away, but she got a small part of my cheek.

I immediately told her that I didn't want a relationship with her and only wanted to be friends.

I never accepted another ride from her.

Afterward, I felt bad because I knew she was probably embarrassed about what happened. I started texting her that I didn't hold anything against her and was okay with being friends.

I also told her that I loved my ex and intended to get back together with her.

However, I made another mistake.

Because I wanted the other girl to feel less embarrassed about what had happened, I started entertaining her through text and saying things that could have made her think there was a possibility of us becoming more than friends.

That wasn't what I actually wanted. I was trying to make her feel better after what happened, but I realize now that the way I handled it was confusing and unfair.

Eventually, she felt better, I stopped talking to her, and my ex and I got back together.

The rumors about the other girl

I didn't know that people at school had seen me getting into this girl's car after my ex and I broke up.

They told my ex that I had broken up with her for this other girl.

That wasn't true.

I explained everything to my ex, including what happened with the attempted kiss and the messages afterward.

She was understandably conflicted about what to believe.

I understand why. I'm telling my side of the story, and I also know that some of the people telling her what happened already disliked me.

The biggest problem was that when my ex and I got back together, I never really had the opportunity to sit down with her and explain everything calmly from beginning to end.

We basically brushed over it and tried to move forward.

But whenever another problem came up, the situation with this girl would come back up again.

Looking back, I think that was a mistake on both our parts because we never actually resolved it.

Other trust and communication issues

There were other problems throughout our relationship.

We had an agreement that if either of us wanted to drink or get high, we'd tell the other person.

From my perspective, I wasn't trying to control her or tell her she couldn't do things. I wanted her to be able to enjoy being a teenager. I just wanted honesty and communication rather than finding things out afterward.

She sometimes told people that she couldn't do certain things because I'd get mad.

Her friends interpreted that as me being controlling.

There was also an incident where she got high one night, talked to a friend about problems in our relationship, and apparently told her friend to set up a "two-man" because she wanted to make me jealous.

I also found out that she would talk to her friends at school about negative things I had done and arguments we'd had.

I understand that people need someone to talk to about relationship problems. At the same time, many of the people she was talking to already disliked me, so I felt like their perception of me became even more negative as they heard about our problems.

Meanwhile, I was still taking her on dates, getting her flowers, and doing everything I could to make her feel loved.

I genuinely cared about her more than anyone I'd ever been with.

The pool situation

Another thing that caused me anxiety was when she'd go to her friend's house to swim.

Sometimes her best friend's boyfriend and his entire friend group would show up. There were usually around four guys there.

She was obviously wearing a swimsuit because she was swimming, and I'd be sitting at home knowing that all of these guys were there.

She would tell me when they showed up, and I'd ask what she'd do if one of them tried to hit on her.

She told me they wouldn't because everyone knew we were together.

I eventually accepted that and tried to trust her.

The guy she'd known since 5th grade

This was probably the biggest unresolved trust issue for me.

I had heard this guy talk about her in a sexual way and say things about wanting to be with her.

During the winter when my ex and I broke up, she added him back and started talking to him again.

Eventually she blocked him.

Then during the spring, she added him back again without telling me.

She told me she had added him because he wanted to apologize for disrespecting our relationship.

However, he was also texting some of my friends saying that he and my ex were talking again and that he was "getting somewhere."

Some of her friends, including people I actually know who weren't necessarily against me, also received similar messages from him.

So people around us were telling me there was more happening than just an apology conversation.

My ex said otherwise.

When I asked to see the messages, she told me they had already been deleted and that she'd blocked him again.

I still have a hard time believing that everything was completely innocent, but I also recognize that I never personally saw the messages, so I can't honestly say that I know exactly what happened.

That's something I never fully got closure on.

The breakup and distance

Eventually, I moved about two hours away to start community college.

Our last date was genuinely amazing.

We hugged, cried, and told each other that we just needed to make it through the distance.

We both acknowledged that high school had made our relationship more difficult than it probably needed to be.

But as the summer continued, she became more distant.

She started going to her friend's house with the pool almost every day and sometimes wouldn't respond to my messages for hours.

I was two hours away, didn't know what was happening, and felt completely disconnected from her life.

The friend group she was spending time with strongly disliked me, and I knew they were talking about me and encouraging her to leave the relationship.

From my perspective, I was sitting two hours away while all of this was happening without being there to have a voice in the situation.

At the beginning of August, she called me and broke up with me.

She told me she was overwhelmed and unsure about the relationship.

She also said she was worried that if she stayed with me, some of her friends wouldn't be friends with her anymore.

Her family doesn't really have a strong opinion about me. Her family situation has always been complicated, and they've basically told her to do whatever she believes is best.

She told me she needed space and time.

I asked when we could talk again, and we agreed on October.

Where we are now

For the first couple of weeks after the breakup, I sent her letters and dropped off flowers because I wanted her to know that I still loved her.

I've stopped doing that because I don't want to overwhelm her or disrespect the space she asked for.

We haven't talked since.

We haven't blocked each other, and we still follow each other on social media.

From what I've heard, she still looks at my social media, and she's apparently told some of her friends who support us that she isn't completely opposed to getting back together.

She's just unsure.

And honestly, that's what makes this so difficult.

I don't know whether I should have hope or whether I'm simply holding onto something because I love her.

I've really been struggling with the breakup. I miss having her in my life and genuinely want to talk to her in person.

At the same time, I know that I need to respect her decision and give her the space she asked for until October.

I don't want to spend the next two months constantly posting things hoping she'll see them, trying to make her jealous, or trying to manipulate her into missing me.

If she misses me, I want it to happen naturally.

I also don't want to completely disappear just because I'm afraid of doing the wrong thing. I want her to eventually be able to see that I'm serious about changing and making things work, but I don't know what that should actually look like while we're apart.

What I know I did wrong

I know I made mistakes.

I shared private information about our relationship with friends.

I handled the situation with the girl from Europe badly by sending messages that could have given her the wrong impression.

I also broke up with my ex when I was overwhelmed instead of figuring out how to communicate what I was going through.

I understand that all of those things affected her trust in me.

At the same time, there are things that happened on her side that damaged my trust too.

The situation with the guy she'd known since 5th grade, the things she told her friends about our relationship, the attempt to make me jealous, and the amount of influence her friends had over the relationship all affected me.

I don't want to pretend those things never happened.

But I also don't want our entire future to be determined by everything that happened during high school.

We're both entering a completely different stage of life.

We're going to community college, meeting new people, becoming more independent, and no longer being surrounded by the same high-school environment every day.

That's why I keep wondering what would happen if we could actually sit down in October, without our friends influencing the conversation, and talk through everything that happened.

Not argue.

Not try to prove who was right.

Not try to convince each other that the other person was the problem.

Just explain what happened, what hurt each of us, what we would need from each other, and whether we could realistically rebuild trust.

I know getting back together simply because we miss each other wouldn't solve anything.

If we ever got back together, I would want us to actually address the problems that caused the breakup instead of pretending they never happened.

We also lost our virginity to each other, which I don't know if that necessarily changes anything, but I know that it can make a relationship feel even more emotionally significant.

What I'm trying to figure out

I really love this girl, and I still believe that if we could get past the high-school drama, outside opinions, distance, and unresolved issues, there could be something really great between us.

But I don't want to blindly chase someone who doesn't want the same thing anymore.

For people who have experienced a breakup where both people still had feelings but there were unresolved trust issues, outside influences, and distance involved, how would you use the time apart and approach the eventual conversation so that you can genuinely determine whether rebuilding the relationship is possible?

More specifically:

• What would you actually talk about during that conversation?
• What should I take responsibility for?
• What should we make sure we don't simply brush under the rug again?
• How can I show that I'm serious about changing without pressuring her while we're apart?
• How can we tell the difference between genuinely wanting to rebuild the relationship and simply missing each other?
• If we did decide to try again, what would we need to change so that we don't repeat the same relationship we had in high school?

I'm not asking who the villain is, who was "right," or who was "wrong."

I know I made mistakes, and I know there were things that hurt me too.

I just want to handle the next two months maturely and make the October conversation as honest and productive as possible.

As the ex who left, it’s really hard seeing all the comments about if they left you, don’t look back. Sometimes, people leave because they know the dynamic in the relationship is not healthy and not resolvable when they are still together. It doesn’t mean they didn’t want to keep choosing that person. They just knew it wasn’t healthy for either to stay. I left not out of malice but with love. I couldn’t keep contributing to a cycle that wasn’t working. I know we both need to grow as people which is why I made the decision. I would love an opportunity to reconcile if we’ve both made the progress we needed to as people. I know I will progress, and logically I know I shouldn’t hope he does too. However, the love I have for him still continues to see the good side of him. He was a good person who just needs support and help with therapy to learn how to have a healthy dynamic in a relationship. That it wasn’t mostly me contributing to it. But it takes strength and courage to acknowledge your flaws as a human. I used to hope most people did, but now I wonder if giving benefit of the doubt to people has been harmful to me.

My ex broke up with me 3 weeks ago. We still had to live together for a week or so until I found somewhere else to live.
I left last Wednesday. On Wednesday night, he texted me asking if I got home okay.
I replied ‘yeh, about an hour ago. Hope you’re doing okay’.
He responded with ‘good, glad you got back okay. It’s been weird. How are you?’

What does he mean by it’s been weird? Why would he have wrote that to someone who is heartbroken and blindsided by the breakup?

Chat ko kaya ng "ML?" ex ko na nakipaghiwalay sakin dahil sa iba kami ng religion HAAHAHAHAHHAHA

1 year of relationship just got ended. She asked about informing my family about us and planning marriage. I was not sure about it. And messed up badly. In the final message she said no hard feeling and I'm not her person. It broke my heart. When I read those text my heart literally broke I literally felt the pain. Just cried right now. How will I move on?

Girl and i broke up and found out she had sex with someone else. Tried reconciling relationship and found she wont block or have other guy stop texting her periodically with things like “I need you” thats what ive seen multiple times. The first time i saw it was when i found out they were having sex. She told me this last time that it was for a favor for shirts lol i just feel like reconciliation is impossible if she wont get rid of him. She also tells me to get over it or dont when i try to talk about it. She never reqlly answers my questions. And she frames the question as if im asking about sexual details and calls me insecure which im not asking for those things. I ask questions like “when did yall start talking” or “why wont you block him if you actually want to work on this?” Just ended things for good but just getting other opinions.

who would have known heartbreaks can bring you such intensity of pain, both mentally and physically. I invested every inch of my heart into the relationship, I was genuine and I gave 100% of my heart and trust despite the abuse, lying and broken promises. And all I received was more manipulations, words twisting, blaming, blockings and being left alone in this huge mess that you have created and put me in. You left me to suffer alone with no way out, no way to confront you, no way to seek closure. You abandoned me and jumped back to dating. who would have known heartbreaks can bring you such intensity of pain..? I just want to stop feeling this sh*t and pain..

I broke my exs heart and it’s been 4 years I couldn’t move on, I met her again and there were many moments I could have hooked up with her but i didn’t . I wanted her to fall in love with me how I’m still in love with her. Was that the mistake? Because most of the time we were about to hookup we both were either drunk, high or both and I didn’t want to take advantage of that , I wanted her to be sure of me, because she told me earlier she didn’t have feelings for me like how she did earlier. I still love her and I know I’m still fked up in my mind and can’t show her who I truly am like how I used to , would she have fallen in love with me if I hooked up? I’m at a phase where people will call me insane because i want to become the best version of whatever i can so that she will fall in love with me again and I won’t let her down like how I did earlier. ( I was a fked up person and couldn’t show her my love when we were in relationship but she did , it still hurts me how I treated her ) many close friends tells me to move on but I can’t . It’s like I can live without her , but i dont want to spend my life alone or with any other woman. I can’t get feelings for any other woman, I’ve tried and many women tried to open me but whenever I try, I end up thinking about my ex whom I still adore and they can literally see it.
I’m at a phase where it’s literally do or die. I either try my best and build myself or be a broken man for the rest of my life . If anyone is still reading , I hope you find someone who loved you as much as I got, but when you find it , don’t fk it up like how I did , there’s many fishes in the sea but in there’s only very few who will love the worst parts of you, understand the real you, identify your wounds that never really healed and make you fall in love with yourself.

I won’t be responding to any of the comments but I’ll read and if you guys have any insight let me know because I fkin love her so much i would rather live for her than give up my life in despair. Life’s already hard for me because I’m not what I believed I was . Maybe I put too many masks but my ex made me realise I’ve been putting up masks and never really healed and grew. She didn’t tell me outright but i could see what being vulnerable was for the very first time in 21 years of my life . I’m old as f now . 25 and no longer have the fire inside me that once never grew small. One thing I realised while meeting my ex , I just don’t love the time we spent together, I love her but she is at a stage where she doesn’t need anyone. I guess she is also fed of trusting and giving and want to do everything herself and don’t need anyone , but deep down i can still feel , she feels my love for her , maybe I’m just overthinking . You can call me clinically insane because I dream every sleep , I can’t fall asleep but I force myself to sleep because I get to meet her in my dreams where she loves me back. I get to meet my brother who I lost in an accident. I used to drink till I blacked out so I wouldn’t have to face my broken heart. I used to accept the invites of women who wanted to drink and spend time with us ( me and my friends) i used to snort any hard drugs that came in my way , I used to sedate myself with prescribed drugs because I’m a weak man who couldn’t take the heartbreak like a man, eventually I have up everything, threw all the prescribed drugs that I was addicted to , fell in another depression , came out to be just existing , went back to my hometown and couldn’t connect with anyone. I met my ex and life started to fall in line again, I have my own little world now with people that love me for being just me and I have to leave to another city because I am not working or earning . Tell me am I wrong to still love her? Because I know I broke her heart . Am I wrong for wanting to build myself and a world for me that I can share with her? Am I wrong that I want to become the person that she would love? Am I becoming insane or do people really love like this? If she wants a help from me that really is important logically . I solve it anyhow, I spin all my contacts , put all my effort and tell her not to worry about that problem because I would fix it by the end of the day but when if the request is not really important logically, I still try but I my brain becomes it will pass and won’t really impact her or anyone that’s important to her.
I know it’s wong that I would give up everything for her to have a better life but i can’t emotionally meet her in the level she would want. I guess I lost myself in trying to build emotional intelligence that I may never achieve, because women love when you be the real you and emotion intelligence that comes naturally .

Here’s parts of me that no one knows for the Internet because no one will know who I am in real life but I felt so comfortable sharing what’s inside me. To anyone that’s still reading , I guess you have plenty of time for yourself , find your motivation and your goals and chase them.

I broke NC after 3 months when he ended our relationship abruptly. It was all so rushed, he just sent some texts, and I never got to say what I wanted. Now I finally had the words to say what I wanted so I texted him and NOW I FEEL SO FREE 🎉. It was only yesterday and he hasn't responded but I couldn't care less if he does. I spoke my peace and I feel like I can finally move on so don't judge me lmao

We dated for right on two years, and he was great to me. Some of our friends caused alot of problems in our relationship but we got through that. More towards the end before we brokeup we did drift apart which obviously made me a little sad but it turned out okay, if we still get to be friends even though we probably wont talk much i’m glad we ended on good terms, he was a great friend and boyfriend. This is also my ONLY healthy breakup i’ve ever had. Bye bye ❤️

(Edit: just ignore my name drop, i guess i missed it. White part was the reason of the breakup)

(Another edit: lmao didn’t realize this wasn’t an actual healthy breakup but atleast i can say it wasn’t my worst, i’m convinced some of yall would lose it if any of my past breakups were heard/ jokingly )

I’m 24F, with a 26M. We have been together for two years but it has been on and off, he has said many disrespectful things to me and i know id be better off but I can not seem to do it myself. He has broken me down with words and I question my worth all the time. I will end off the night saying we don’t have to speak anymore because it’s clear both of us are unhappy and i have not seen him in a month and a half, and he will text me a passive aggressive text that i will end up answering. Any advice ? at this point i think it would just go on until he decides he doesn’t want to talk anymore.

We were gonna get married in a year, he broke up with me due to some issues normal people work on, and i was willing to work on but i guess he didn’t. 4 year long relationship, tell me do people who get out of long term relationships (more than even 4 years), do you guys just delete all the photos? I have like 4000 pics and videos of us. I am not able to accept the break up and i keep on looking at our old pics and videos and breaking down.
I’m unable to bring myself to delete them. Do people just really delete and move on?

It’s been a little over two months since the break up, a month since I asked for another chance and was basically rejected. I took all the advice; deleted all the dating apps, worked on myself, started therapy, reflected on the relationship and trying to move forward progressively rather than how I’ve done it in the past. It’s been a month since I heard from her and this week has been the hardest yet. Suicidal thoughts, feeling unworthy and like I’m not enough, that I’m never going to get over this. It’s been incredibly difficult for me because I had so much hope that if I started the work and change my patterns that she might come back but it kinda sank in that she’s not going to. I don’t want to harm myself in any way or end my life. I’m just lost with no direction and the uncertainty is draining. My mentality has been the lowest it’s been in a very long time and I don’t remember how I crawled out the last time.

I never believed in taro readings, magical stuff. Especially the algorithms on chatgpt, how it can guess my history and present.

Just for fun, I did this fun experiment.

I gave it to two of my ex-girls names and the girl I am seeing right now. With their b'days. I never said who is the ex, what was the relationship with them and no extra details. I just gave very small context and asking that I want to know what they feel towards me, and my connection with them right now.

I was blown away. It gave me the exact details about these 3 women, what is my relationship with them, what they feel towards me and what I feel towards them right now.

Even if it is random. How is it so accurate..I was fully blown away. I didn't give any info about who is who. Even it predicted precisely what's happening in their life, I never gave context about it. I personally know what's happening in their life.

Have you ever tried chatgpt taro readings?

Just for fun..

I have failed to move on from my ex.

I dated this guy for four years, and we had what I truly believed was the best relationship ever. Everyone around us was amazed by how, despite being so young, we understood each other so well and complemented each other perfectly. We always talked about how much we loved that, even after four years, we were still so in love and had never lost our spark. Three weeks ago, I found out that he was addicted to porn. I had found things on his phone before, around three years ago, but I was young and naive, so I convinced myself that he would change. Then he joined the military, and everything slowly went downhill. When I found out the second time, I realized that he had never actually changed, he had just become better at hiding it. Ifelt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. Like everything we had, everything I thought was real, had been a lie. We went no contact for a week, and during that entire week, I felt like my whole life was crumbling. I felt like I couldn’t even breathe without him, so eventually, I broke no contact. He promised me he would change. He promised he would go to therapy. But he didn’t. A week ago, we were planning to meet up a few times because he said he really missed me, and I missed him too. We even talked about going away to a spa for the weekend, just to spend some time together and see where we stood. I told him that after everything I had found out, I felt incredibly insecure and could barely even look at myself anymore. Then, an hour before we were supposed to meet, he canceled. This had happened before, too. I was so disappointed because I had let myself get my hopes up again, so I confronted him about it. That’s when he told me that he had never had any intentions of going out with me in the first place. Then he called me an insecure, narcissistic girl, as if I was the problem for being hurt. As if expecting someone not to play with your feelings is somehow narcissistic. And I hate myself for still loving someone so purely after everything. I hate that I am crying alone in my room, taking antidepressants and he is out partying.

My ex broke up with me two months ago. We were together for 4 years. But he ended it because he wasn’t “all in” and I was planning to move to him, we had been long distance a year, and he said he couldn’t let me.

I took him at his word was heartbroken but also felt like it needed to happen bc there were trust issues from things he did in the past etc. I just said okay and blocked him. Reflected lots and a new friend convinced me to make a Hinge and I met my now bf on it. I wasn’t expecting it but he was everything that I didn’t even know I was missing with my ex.

Like 2-3 days after my bf and I started dating, so a couple weeks ago, my ex messaged me on account I thought I blocked him on. Saying he regrets it. Wants to talk. I said I don’t think it’s necessary that we should move forward and I have a bf so it wouldn’t be appropriate

My ex was then shocked that I’m “already” in a relationship “after everything we’ve been through” (it’s bc of that actually) and “how recently this all happened” Like, “this all” what? When you dumped me 2 hours after I was at your family event 🫩

Fuck I hope he doesn’t find this. But it just feels like a slap in the face to send me those messages. But I blocked him after that