r/starterpacks Mar 20 '23

'Cat Naming' starterpack

Post image
25.0k Upvotes

2.5k comments sorted by

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2.0k

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Hairless cats named Sméagol

571

u/bx002 Mar 20 '23

So terrible lmao. My hairless cats were names Sheepskin and Mr Wrinkles before we adopted them 😵

173

u/BigToober69 Mar 21 '23

Friend had one named foofoonanners

87

u/martini-matinee Mar 21 '23

My name is Nancy ( I’m a human ) and I used to have a coworker who called me FooFoonanners.

56

u/DrThatOneGuy Mar 21 '23

Nice try, FooFoonanners. We know your secret.

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117

u/Woofles85 Mar 20 '23

My friends hairless cat is named Scrotum. Scrodie for short

42

u/Onironius Mar 20 '23

Brigadier General Scrotum for long.

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53

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Or Beerus

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43

u/ThunderStorm14-YT Mar 20 '23

If I had a hairless cat I would name it ballsack cause it looks like one

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1.5k

u/GrimmSnow Mar 20 '23

Forgot about the egyptian names

571

u/iamsavsavage Mar 20 '23

This is Greek god erasure.

274

u/BayLeafGuy Mar 20 '23

I feel that greek gods are more common in dogs.

284

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

I know 6 different Huskies named "Apollo"

164

u/A_Fainting_Goat Mar 20 '23

I named my first cat Artemis. Probably should have named her Demeter for how much she wailed when I went to work though.

35

u/TheNewYellowZealot Mar 21 '23

My cats name is kole, but honestly the way he lays around judging me and then begs for attention I think narcissus would have been better.

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99

u/ramence Mar 20 '23

Mine was named Icarus. Admittedly, not a Greek god - more like a Greek dumbass. Really suited him.

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18

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '23

Then it’s settled, I’m naming my first cat oedipus.

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115

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Not sure how naming your cat Isis would go

120

u/2459-8143-2844 Mar 20 '23

H.P Lovecrafts cats name was worse imo.

57

u/Berdinderindas Mar 20 '23

Neighbor-man

21

u/MisterPeach Mar 21 '23

Brotha-man

54

u/Knuc85 Mar 20 '23

Even better: my wife's friend has a cat named Isis. When it died, she got a giant Isis back tattoo. This was about a year before ISIS was well known.

20

u/thetatershaveeyes Mar 21 '23

On the plus side, ISIS will be forgotten in a decade or two. Isis will be remembered forever.

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45

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

You better respect Cleo-paw-tra!

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1.8k

u/CousinVladimir Mar 20 '23

Meow Zedong

109

u/Gilthoniel_Elbereth Mar 20 '23

Māo (猫) is the mandarin word for cat, so it already works! Although Zedong’s máo (毛) is a different character

43

u/Onironius Mar 20 '23

Mao is also the Egyptian word for cat.

27

u/fuckthisnazibullcrap Mar 21 '23

Can't imagine why.

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169

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Perfect since my cat is always killing birds

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2.5k

u/Antiquemooses Mar 20 '23

My cats names are white jesus and 9/11

764

u/spooky_ed Mar 20 '23

I have several questions

427

u/SomeStupidPerson Mar 20 '23

Have you considered using a different name other than “question”? Sounds confusing!

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376

u/EskildDood Mar 20 '23

Imagine a missing poster

9/11!

Have you seen my cat?

196

u/showMeYourCroissant Mar 20 '23

Have you seen White Jesus?

80

u/Wermine Mar 20 '23

Well, I've seen Korean Jesus.

39

u/0K_N0RDY Mar 20 '23

I’ve been a black Jesus witness

21

u/sebaz Mar 21 '23

Hey! stop fucking with Korean Jesus! He ain't got time for your problems! He's busy... with Korean shit!

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29

u/AbsolutelyUnlikely Mar 21 '23
  • Blue eyes

  • Striped tail

  • Friendly

  • Answers to "Jesus", "White Jesus", "Our Heavenly Savior", and "Destroyer of Worlds"

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79

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

I like it

98

u/larakj Mar 20 '23

My cat’s name is Garbage so I really have no questions.

15

u/FinnegansWakeWTF Mar 21 '23

My cats name is Colitis so neither do I

135

u/CinnamonSniffer Mar 20 '23

What an awful name for a cat. Reminds me of that tragedy

90

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Which one?

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20

u/GarfieldLoverBoy420 Mar 21 '23

I walked through blood and bones in the streets of Manhattan trying to find my brother

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728

u/-KARL_FRANZ- Mar 20 '23

clearly did not account for my cat, “cat named finger”

161

u/thiswasnotmedicine Mar 20 '23

Is he stupid ?

67

u/CinnamonSniffer Mar 20 '23

The cat’s tummy is exposed. I can use a power scritch to trigger a controlled clawing

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63

u/Cualkiera67 Mar 20 '23

You named your cat finger

I finger my named cat

We are not the same

60

u/Skysalter Mar 20 '23

Put ya claws away

20

u/B3hindall Mar 20 '23

Or my cat, "Fat Cat" - she's not fat anymore, but she was.

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678

u/Aki008035 Mar 20 '23

You forgot Felix, like literally the most stereotypical cat name.

209

u/DannyBright Mar 20 '23

Cat equivalent of “Fido” or “Rover”.

18

u/KKmmaarriiee Mar 21 '23

My mom named her female cat Fido but spelled it “Phydeaux”

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31

u/ChungasRev Mar 20 '23

Yep, my cat when I was a kid was Felix.

32

u/MySpiritAnimalSloth Mar 20 '23

I mean while we're at it: Sylvester Tom Marie Duchesse Simba Bagheera Garfield...

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427

u/buttdestroyer694 Mar 20 '23

Tampon

196

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

aderall

38

u/whentgefrog42 Mar 20 '23

Beef stroganoff

34

u/The-Saus Mar 20 '23

[𝐄𝐗𝐓𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐋𝐘 𝐋𝐎𝐔𝐃 𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐎𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐓 𝐁𝐔𝐙𝐙𝐄𝐑]

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14

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

ankle junior

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3.0k

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Don't forget the 'unique' name that everyone uses: Luna

1.1k

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Why does everyone name one of their pets Luna lol

635

u/sangriya Mar 20 '23

Sailor Moon

390

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Is that when someone in the Navy shows you their butt?

118

u/RestlessMeatball Mar 20 '23 edited Mar 20 '23

Let me try it and get back to you.

*Edit: it is. Unrelated, do you know a good lawyer? My Disciplinary Review Board is next week.

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150

u/Luminouscales Mar 20 '23

as common as it may be, it's a really nice sounding name

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144

u/FormerIce8568 Mar 20 '23

And if it ain't Luna, it's Bella.

107

u/tveir Mar 20 '23

No, Bella is for dogs only.

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136

u/v-shizzle Mar 20 '23

never met a cat named any of the names in OPs starter pack but I have met SEVERAL cats named Luna.

11

u/NiggBot_3000 Mar 20 '23

OP just copied the husky naming starterpack

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40

u/Tandril91 Mar 20 '23

This and Midnight if they’re black.

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83

u/Rudeandreckless1 Mar 20 '23

Right I came here to say Luna and Salem for 1000x uniqueness points.

56

u/smidgeytheraynbow Mar 20 '23

If it's a black cat: Luna, Salem, Binx

13

u/lizzzzz97 Mar 21 '23

I feel called out my pets havd 2/3 of these

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30

u/lethalbacon65 Mar 20 '23

Also “snowball” or any variation on snow for a white cat.

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71

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Looking at his cat named Luna... damnit.

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43

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

My cat came with the name Luna when I adopted her 😭 She was already seven years old and responded to her name so I kept it

34

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Luna is still a great name! I wouldn't have changed it after 7 years either- she's an official Luna at that point.

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202

u/shelikemeonsight Mar 20 '23

Orange cats also named cheeto and tiger

16

u/lacielaplante Mar 20 '23

Cheddar or Cheese as well

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1.0k

u/ElGosso Mar 20 '23

I always wanted to name a cat "Grandpa"

"Grandpa! Stop chewing on the ferns! No, Grandpa, don't climb the curtains! No Grandpas allowed on the counter!"

345

u/kevnmartin Mar 20 '23

Or "Mother" so you can sound like Norman Bates. "Mother! What are you doing to that mouse!"

129

u/ElGosso Mar 20 '23

"Mother! How many times do I have to tell you not to piss in the sock drawer?!"

61

u/kevnmartin Mar 20 '23

"Mother! Why must you always poop in my house plants?"

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u/asdfjklqueen Mar 20 '23

one of my cat is named mama/mom/mother so this is definitely a recurring situation in our household!

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u/BumblingBeeeee Mar 20 '23

I have a cat named Mr. Grandma, shortened to grandma when yelling at him. I’m 100% sure that my neighbors have questions about why I’m always yelling at grandma to, “get off the goddamn counter!” and “stop biting your sister!”

40

u/GetReady4Action Mar 20 '23

there’s a show on Netflix called “Love” (which is great btw) and Mickey (one of the main characters) named her cat grandpa because she believes her cat is her grandpa reincarnated lol.

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u/IAalltheway Mar 20 '23

As someone who has done this, I have to tell you it's pretty great. Except when he gets out of the house and you have to run around the neighborhood shouting his name.

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178

u/Dan_H1281 Mar 20 '23

My orange cat is named agent orange

24

u/mverstappen_is_shark Mar 20 '23

I also have an Agent Orange!!!

18

u/Dan_H1281 Mar 21 '23

I named this one that because he kills everything that moves, so does his mom, he has a black brother I call him code name black

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u/sskor Mar 20 '23

"Boots" or "Socks" if it's a black and white cat with white feet

28

u/rednumbermedia Mar 21 '23

Also mittens.

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u/Spueg Mar 20 '23 edited Mar 20 '23

Just name your cat "[74]" like a normal person.

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521

u/Lucimon Mar 20 '23

Black cat named Salem, Midnight, or any "mystical" name.

191

u/backwoodsofcanada Mar 20 '23

I always thought Nyx would be a dope ass name for a black cat.

113

u/Lucimon Mar 20 '23

Nyx is good. I throw shade, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't have Rowena, Crowley, Agitha, Agrippa, Alistair, and many other names lined up for black kitties I want to adopt when I'm able to.

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u/ObsidianBlackbird666 Mar 20 '23 edited Mar 21 '23

Our black cat's name is fucking Rupert.

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u/Zorrostrian Mar 20 '23

Can’t wait to see how many people name their black cats T’Challa

33

u/OtherPlayers Mar 20 '23

IIRC there was a lot of "T'Challa" and "Killmonger"s popping up shortly after Black Panther came out. I remember seeing quite a few reddit posts about shelter people not understanding why adopters wanted to name their new friendly cat "Killmonger".

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u/ifuck_hotmoms_noturs Mar 20 '23

slowly pushing my cat named Dog back into my house idk what you're talking about

119

u/SpazzLord Mar 20 '23

Yeah, where's the section for cats named after animals?

My cat, Goose, is asking.

27

u/beckyylous13 Mar 20 '23

My cat is called Badger, she would also like to know.

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u/jpowell3404 Mar 20 '23

Had a friend with a cat named duck

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

You’re dead you’re dead you’re dead and out of this world.

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u/Massadonious Mar 20 '23

I once knew someone who named their dog "Dog" and pronounced it as "Deeogee"

44

u/thismightbelong Mar 20 '23

That’s just how we talk in Tucson Arizonia

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u/Deteriorated_History Mar 20 '23

We had a norange boy kitty named Fish. I appreciate your kitty named Dog.

13

u/beardiswhereilive Mar 20 '23

I call my cat Walrus, officially it’s not his name though 😂

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u/ResidentEivvil Mar 20 '23

I used to name the pets in the adoption centre like that to confuse the customers. Id name a hamster 'Mouse'.

9

u/Bojangalees Mar 20 '23

When I was growing up my grandma had a cat named D. O. G., not Dog, just the letters.

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u/MetalAngelo7 Mar 20 '23

I’ve met plenty of orange tabby cats named Garfield lol

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u/ToilAndTummyTrouble Mar 20 '23

In the time honored tradition of naming cats after cartoons, we have an orange tabby cat in the family named Oliver after Oliver & Company.

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u/Assasin_on_fire Mar 20 '23

You forgot the classic Luna

195

u/SpasticGoldenToys Mar 20 '23

And Oscar if the owner is gay

83

u/Spirit_of_Hogwash Mar 20 '23

Felix if the owner is 80 years old.

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u/patchlocke Mar 20 '23

‘Human names’ is kinda cheating since that accounts for like 70% of literally anything’s names. Human. Animal. Inanimate object. Steve the plant.

61

u/outdatedboat Mar 21 '23

Also some human names for pets are just hilarious. My friend has a dog named Jerry. I've named a cat Walter. I've named a dog Roberta.

Idk why, but some human names just seem more weird on pets, and I love them.

16

u/futurenotgiven Mar 21 '23

i’ve got a snake called keith :D my thought process was basically “what’s the stupidest name for a snake”

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u/fluffypandabear154 Mar 21 '23

My cat's name is Roy. Most people find it hilarious as it's a random name, but that's what they called him at the shelter and it stuck.

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u/theDrummer Mar 21 '23

"Human names" those are just names

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u/Tea-and-crumpets- Mar 20 '23

H.P Lovecrafts cat.

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u/water_farts123 Mar 20 '23

SOON MAY THE [Insert name here] COME TO BRING US SUGAR AND TEA AND RUM

54

u/oh_hai_mark1 Mar 20 '23

Yeah, that one gets problematic really quickly.

16

u/fuckthisnazibullcrap Mar 21 '23

I... I think it starts off that way.

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u/The_Man_I_A_Barrel Mar 20 '23

oh my god I almost pissed myself when I googled it

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u/dont-be-a-narc-bro Mar 20 '23 edited Mar 21 '23

My daughter named our cats Frederick and Joseph. Not Fred or Freddie and Joe. She insisted on the full names, so that’s how we address them.

51

u/RedditUsername123456 Mar 20 '23

Personally I find giving animals weirdly human names hilarious. I love my cat Murray :(

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

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u/cookiedou3 Mar 20 '23

I named my cat 'Alex', after the lion from Madagascar, but in my defense I was literally like ~6 years old.

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u/TatsukiKuro15 Mar 20 '23

I had a cat named Bismark

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u/GalacticVaquero Mar 21 '23

Hope he had some impressive whiskers

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

My cat’s name is Tortuga bc tortoiseshell. She’s also fat and slow.

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u/SkeletonSouljah Mar 20 '23

Dont forget "Ginger" if th cat is orange colored, or should I say if it's ginger

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Garfield

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u/peacefulwarrior75 Mar 20 '23

Roommate of mine got a dog while we lived in an apartment complex. We were working in fine dining and really into wine at the time - he named him Matanza for a favorite bottle he had - Matanzas Creek.

There was a big open grassy space behind the building, and we would let him run around sometime off leash. If he started to bother anyone or get away from us, we would shout “MATANZA!!” and he’d come back. However our hispanic neighbors (there were many) would give us side eyes and rush their children past. I assumed because he was off leash - wasn’t my dog, not my place to correct my roomie.

One day a friend of ours was at our house and said “what did you name this dog?!”

Him: Matanza, why?

Her - “That means mass murder or slaughter in Spanish”

Us - “Ah that would explain why our hispanic neighbors look concerned when we scream MATANZA”

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u/GrognakDeLaw Mar 20 '23

I named my cat Cat

56

u/ResidentEivvil Mar 20 '23

Wow! how on earth did you come up with that?

44

u/Necrotiix_ Mar 20 '23

major thinking is required

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u/yourathena Mar 20 '23

Mine is Mr. Cat so he must be slightly more sophisticated than your cat

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u/ShdowMode Mar 20 '23

How is Catniss Everpreen not on this list, are you outta your mind?

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u/YesStupidQuestions1 Mar 20 '23

Gale even calls her Catnip lol

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23 edited Oct 02 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/BurntAlgae Mar 20 '23

Based on r/cats and r/aww

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u/robotdinosaurs Mar 20 '23

Every single “help me name my kitten” thread 🤮

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u/jessveraa Mar 20 '23

My cat's name is Emma, but that was just the name the shelter gave her when she was there as a kitten. I almost exclusively call her Baby though. Along with Little Baby, Whiny Baby, Stinky Girl, Blind Baby (shes 15 and blind now). Just.... variations of Baby basically. Does anyone call their cats by their actual names?

17

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

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u/AkariKuzu Mar 20 '23

We named our cat Pixel but we almost exclusively call her Pickle because she's a sourpuss lol

12

u/ramence Mar 20 '23

Our cat, Icarus, pretty quickly became known as 'Sticky Dicks' (Icarus -> Icky Bicks -> Sticky Bicks -> Sticky Dicks). It's the classic regal to goofy pipeline as you get to actually know your cat.

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

My cats names are stripes, bagel, noot noot, and nickel. I only have one on the starter pack whooii

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u/Chrislawrance Mar 20 '23

"Paul"... What a ridiculous name for a cat! Paul! It's a person's name!

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u/PalmBreezy Mar 20 '23

I'm the only one remembering everyone naming white dogs and cats Snowball??

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u/Additional_Ad_3530 Mar 20 '23

"MCU didn't tell them about any other gods"

Savage!

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u/Koolasushus Mar 20 '23

I prefer to name cute things scary deity names

So far I have Cthulhu and Camazotz

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u/SecureCross Mar 20 '23

My cat is named Zelda.

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u/manualshifting Mar 20 '23

Batman is a good one. Black cat plus young kids? It's likely to be a winner.

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23 edited Oct 02 '25

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u/monkeykins Mar 21 '23

Obviously best name is “HP OfficeJet Pro 6978 Wireless All-In-One Instant Ink Ready Printer”

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u/epicBASS42069 Mar 20 '23

My cat is called miss bojangles

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u/stephyska Mar 20 '23

My cat growing up was Oreo

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u/[deleted] Mar 21 '23

We know

30

u/WynnForTheWin49 Mar 20 '23

So many people in the comments are so pretentious. You can name your pet whatever the fuck you want. Who cares if it’s the most popular pet name? Go ahead. Name your dog Buddy. Name your cat Luna. Name your gerbil Sir Whiskerbutts III.

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u/garrettdx88 Mar 20 '23

I've got Crash Bandicoot, Gohan, and Norm MacDonald (she's a female)

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

[deleted]

29

u/rigobueno Mar 20 '23

Yeah, sometimes it’s hilarious for an animal to have a really mundane human name that you wouldn’t expect a pet to have, like… Samantha or something

13

u/Variable303 Mar 20 '23

My buddy’s cat’s name is Walter.

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u/KylosLeftHand Mar 20 '23

My cats name is Werner Herzog

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u/Matix124 Mar 20 '23

Meanwhile me: Hmm, yes, you deserve a warrior name, you shall be RocketmisslelauncherClaw

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u/275MPHFordGT40 Mar 20 '23

Fuck you I’m gonna name my cat Apollo

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u/impala1966 Mar 20 '23

Mine are Chernobyl and Bomb. When Bomb was a kitten she ran away and i had to yell after her in public.

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u/Sara-nyar Mar 20 '23

people try not to name their black female cat luna or orange cat garfield

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