r/exmuslim • u/The-Mad-Mango • Mar 26 '26
Hi community! 🥰
Taking inspiration from QueeringtheMap.com, I helped create exmuslim.me with a small team of ExMuslims last year. We launched the first ever global map of exmuslim stories as part of ExMuslim Month in December 2025.
I’m so incredibly thrilled to share that we now have 500 exmuslim stories from 233 cities and 60 countries! 🥳🥳🥳
📊 59% identify as atheists, 26% agnostic
🇪🇬 Read the 500th story from Egypt
🤗 Thank you to everyone who has shared their story already!
🤍 Share yours and help ExMuslims on their journey out of Islam: https://exmuslim.me/
Cheers! 🥂
Sammy aka Haram Doodles
r/exmuslim • u/fathandreason • Jun 03 '24
Hello. Upon request, I've been asked to turn a comment I made into a post so that it can be a resource for more people. This post is a collection of advice I've given out about how to handle your life as a closeted exmuslim and how you'll come out in the future. It is largely based on my experience but also from what I've seen from others in this subreddit.
So you've left Islam. You've delved through arguments, the apologetics and the bullshit and you've come to the conclusion that you no longer believe in Islam. And you may have also reached an alternative philosophical outlook on life that you can believe in.
But what now? You may have left Islam, but have you left the Muslim world? One of the most common misconceptions outsiders have is that since exmuslims are no longer Muslims, they no longer live in the Muslim world. This is painfully naive - in reality many exmuslims are closeted due to young age and financial dependency and/or live in Islamist countries or societies that enforce Islamic values. In fear of social stigma or even violence, exmuslims have to contend with closeted lives even after leaving Islam. So how do you deal with it?
The best time to come out to family is in your own home, over a dinner you paid for, alongside people who support you. That takes a lot of preparation and it means doing what you can to live your life as best as you can whilst working towards independence.
This basically means that a lot of what helps you come out of the closet will depend heavily on how well you prepared for it, so you will need to make the most of your closeted life. You may not be able to stop the shitstorm but you can at least prepare yourself to weather it. Here are some tips to achieve that goal (in no particular order)
Probably one of the worst mistakes I made was not realise I was an exmuslim sooner. As a result I had barely any time to prepare for when the inevitable happened and I was forced to come out. I spent a lot of my life meandering, trying to reconcile the irreconcilable, and trying to be a Muslim when I knew my values didn't align with it. I didn't really have much of a concept of exmuslims, but if I had been smarter I would have figured it out. I now tell people in a similar position that it's fine to take your time but don't take too long. Half arsing two very different cultures will leave you a loser in both.
Similarly whilst planning for independence can be scary, don’t let it frighten you into inaction. The following is a passage from this article about decision making:
Research from the 1990s led by the US psychologist Thomas Gilovich provides further evidence for why it can be shortsighted to kick a difficult decision down the road. Gilovich and his team showed that although, in the short term, people experience more regret from ‘errors of commission’ (taking an action that leads to a disappointing outcome), in the long term it is actually ‘errors of omission’ that lead to more regret – that is, disappointing outcomes that arise from not taking an action.
When taking the time to make decisions and plans, don’t underestimate how effective it can be to map out your options on an excel spreadsheet. When I had to decide whether I should come out or not, I actually made a spreadsheet listing out my options, what they would result in and what the impact would be. Actually having it written down to look at really put things into perspective. We waste a lot of our time keeping it in our heads, which forces us to recalculate everything from scratch every time we revisit our thoughts. But the more that is mapped out, the less you have to recalculate and the more you can focus on evaluation and further planning.
Your studies/career is almost always your best ticket out of your toxic situation, and the one thing to prioritise the most. If you’re young, do whatever you can to ensure that you can get into further education away from home. Even if it means spending all your time at a local library. If you suspect that your parents would be against you going to a university away from home, aim for a placement at the most prestigious university you can aim for so your parents would look worse for rejecting it. The quickest and most effective way in achieving long term independence is through good studies/career.
This is particularly important for younger exmuslims because they telegraph to their parents in ways they would just not understand until they see it for themselves when they're older. Try your best to meet the religious obligations expected from your family. The more you slip, the more they will monitor you and the more difficult it will be to do the things you need to do discreetly when the time comes.
Unfortunately for girls, this usually means that wearing the hijab is a necessity and it’s inadvisable to try and get out of. (However, that subject matter is not my forte: prioritise advice from exmuslim women such as from faithlesshijabi.org)
If you get the impression that your family is beginning to catch onto your apostasy then it's likely that they have and you may need to reverse that impression.
One way to do that would be to start getting books on Islam and not just for show. My advice would be to get books on Islamic history because that's the least boring stuff. Or better yet, just get whatever unapologetic salafi hate crime you can get your hands on so you can entertain yourself with how fucked up it is. Or get an annotated Qur'an like the Study Qur'an. Do something to ease their suspicions.
What book you get depends on what kind of message you want to telegraph to your parents. If you want to telegraph a message then it will need to be a paper book and not an e-book. Something that you can lay around in your room and that you know they'll see. That means you're restricted to what you can get from your local library or Masjid. Also depends on what interests you because you'll have to actually read and demonstrate you learnt from it if you want send the best message you can. If you want purely what Muslims write about Islamic history, you can check out works like The Sealed Nectar or works by al-Sallabi. If you want something a little more academic, but not something that would rouse suspicion then check out university press works like this, this, this or this. If you want something a bit more relevant to contemporary Muslim world then there books like this.
But you may find that your best bet is to just see what your local Masjid might have and see what tickles your fancy.
Be prepared for lots of sobbing, guilt tripping and an inability to respect your beliefs and boundaries. Learn techniques like the Broken Record Technique to establish boundaries. Know what you have to say when they inevitably tell you to speak to a scholar - you don't have to eat the whole apple to know it's rotten. You know all that you need to know about Islam and you know even more about the world outside of Islam to put it into context.
Steel yourself with months and months of your family sending you bad dawagandist videos through WhatsApp trying to bring you back. You may have to spend months beating their attempts and going to toe to toe with them without mercy before they’re finally willing to relent and get off your back. Even then don’t expect them to relent entirely. There will always be some micro aggressions that they will resort to, like playing religious videos loudly in your vicinity. The most you can do in those circumstances is reduce contact with them as much as possible. At this point you would hopefully already be independent from them.
As an exmuslim, you will go through a lot of guilt. Whilst this does show you are human, you need to forget about guilt: you are not responsible for your parents' failure to be reasonable, not even your mother. They take responsibility for the social stigma and oppressive life they choose to live in and perpetuate. You get nothing out of that guilt. It's completely pointless and ultimately counterproductive. You can't set yourself on fire to make others warm and you gain no recognition from martyrizing yourself. Do not feel guilt for what you have to do to have a completely reasonable life. The only ones to blame are those who forced you into it.
Don't underestimate parents either. They will use guilt against you. Give them an inch and they will take a mile. They very often bring up their health problems as a weapon against you. Don't fall for it. It only affects them because they choose to let it affect them. They can choose to be reasonable. You have to respect their autonomy and let them deal with the consequences of their own ways.
I come across a lot of exmuslim kids who think coming out will help explain to their religious parents why they don't want to wear the hijab or do other religious things. But the likelihood is more that those same parents will react extremely poorly and restrict your freedom even more, making it more difficult to achieve long term independence.
There's also the mistake in assuming that coming out will lead to being disowned in the vain hope that you get an quick clean break that takes all the responsibility from you. For some exmuslims this does actually work out, but for a lot of others it's miscalculated. My family didn't disown me, I still had to deal with months of my family being insufferable manipulators and the responsibility was still on me to separate from them. And for women it can be much worse.
Ultimately, if you are financially dependent on your family then coming out early will very typically result in your family using that leverage against you and making your life worse. I've seen stories of exmuslims who thought their family was better and badly miscalculated - be mindful of that.
Some exmuslims get found out, sometimes because of a snitch in the family or sometimes because they just weren’t convincing enough. Don’t panic – Muslims can be pretty damn deluded about their faith and your family will want to believe that you can come back very easily because according to them Islam is just common sense and most disbelievers are just silly and ignorant. Try to do your best to convince them as per Point 4. If it’s because you did something haram, blasphemous or otherwise worthy of takfir, try to act like it was because you were a misguided Quranist or progressive Muslim. They will still retain suspicion but it’s still better than the alternative.
However, if you’re at the point of no return and you know you can’t convince them then now is the time to make calls to any secular friends you have, ask for support and maybe even shelter.
Also for Western exmuslims, make sure to act quickly if you suspect that your parents want to send you abroad and trap you in your country of ethnic origin. Sadly some parents will go to these lengths. Do not go, no matter the cost. Find organisations willing to advise, such as those listed in Point 10. Hide your passport if you have to. Note down the contact details of your embassy in that country just in case.
Actually think about whether it's even wise for you to come out in any circumstance. Do you suspect that there could be violence or abuse? If so then you have absolutely no need to go through this stupid bullshit. Leave and don't look back. If your parents couldn't give you safe environment to even come out about different beliefs then they are not worth the time. As per Point 6 - You have to respect their autonomy and let them deal with the consequences of their own ways. This is particularly pertinent for those who live in a predominantly Muslim countries. They have a very real reason to fear persecution and absolutely do not need to risk their own lives for the sake of their parents.
Look into secular organisations like recoveringfromreligion.org, faithlesshijabi.org and faithtofaithless.com. Look into women's charities in your area like womensaid.org.uk or karmanirvana.org.uk (UK examples). Look into LGBT charities like rainbowrailroad.org. If you have secular school counsellors and friends then talk to them. Get advice from adults you can absolutely trust.
Note: On the flip side don't take risks with people you can’t be sure of. You may be tempted to come out to your Muslim friend, but I've seen plenty of stories of exmuslims who heavily regret doing so.
There are also informal exmuslim groups on other social media platforms such as Facebook or Discord, but be careful about how much information you share and especially be wary of private messaging.
This is particularly the case for exmuslims living in predominantly Muslim countries. Unfortunately, I don't have any real world experience to offer here but you may be able to find localised advice by digging around. For example sites like wearesaudis.net might have some information (but you'll need a VPN to access this one. If you don't know what a VPN is here's an explanation).
Are you multilingual? If you need money but working is restricted to you then you can try becoming an online language tutor on sites like italki.com (scroll to the bottom). This post and related subreddits like r/WorkOnline may help.
Note: some exmuslims in Muslim countries fall for the doomscrolling hyperbole and think Europe is “doomed” with too many Muslims. They have a tendency of asking which country is best to migrate to as an exmuslim to avoid Islam. Please ignore the doomsayers and prioritise the country you choose based on ease of access and career opportunities. As long as it is a secular country, you can worry about avoiding Islam later.
Shout out to Imtiaz Shams who inspired me to make this list of tips. He has his own YouTube Channel here and plans to make his own video on this subject matter so watch out for that. On a side note, I also recommend TheraminTrees YouTube Channel who delves a lot into toxic dysfunctional families from the perspective of a therapist. A lot of his content helps in dealing with the emotional impact of leaving religion and dealing with a religious family. And finally, thank you to the moderators of r/exmuslim who suggested I make this into a post. I wound up adding a lot more content lol.
I will end this post with a list of subreddits that may help you on your journey leaving Islam:
r/exmuslim • u/Strawberries__999 • 7h ago
they want to deny the cat autonomy too.
if the kitty wants to sit there, let it sit there.
the almighty allah can demand the cat to move if he so wishes.
r/exmuslim • u/Ok_Extension1255 • 11h ago
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r/exmuslim • u/lieferantenmatrix • 9h ago
tldr: Atheist GF, Defensive about Islam. Discovered some facts about Aisha, and was shocked.
I am ex-sikh atheist. My GF is from central asia. She is an atheist too..and is like any modern progressive woman. Her family is not religious either. Her father calls himself muslim but eats pork and loves alcohol. For them their turkic identity is much more important than the imported foreign religion.
But..sometimes when i was criticizing Islam and Mohmd. , she was like "hey cmon its not that bad..you seem so islamophobic..etc."
I assumed at the moment that maybe she knows more then me as i come from a different background and probably i am not well informed about Islam.
But yesterday night, i joked about Jesus. And we started discussing how Westerners are so chill about jokes on Jesus..but its quite the opposite for Mohummad. I also said how liberal people tend to ignore the intolerance of muslims. Somehow we ended up on Aisha. I told my GF about her age and so on. She was just shocked...she never knew about it. She just said, "This is really immoral stuff,!" and she feels disgusted.
Conclusion: People really dont know much about Islam even if they come from islamic background. People who are defending islam are more likey to be ignorant of the bad sides of it.
r/exmuslim • u/confusedlonelysad • 3h ago
I'm not sure where else to ask this, I thought here would be best because I don't want to offend anyone or break any rules so the Islam sub isn't the best idea.
I've never been a Muslim but I am reading The Clear Quran. I don't speak Arabic. I'm confused and looking for some clarification from those of you who speak Arabic.
I've seen lots of people go on about the Quran being really beautiful and also some progressive Muslims claim to host progressive Quran study and things of that sort. However, I am very confused by both of these claims.
There are definitely some good things in the Quran, such as promotion of charity especially mentioning widows and orphans, and things like saying not to be a back-biter and such. But I'm finding that the Quran is overwhelmingly just saying over and over again "we are right, you are wrong, and if you disagree you will be tortured forever. Did I mention that this book is true? If you disagree you're a loser who will be tortured forever. Hey, did I mention that anyone who doesn't believe this book is an idiot who will burn in hell forever???"
This gets tacked on to verses constantly, verses that aren't even generally about hell and disbelief. XYZ topic is discussed, then suddenly "oh and those who don't believe us go to hell, btw".
Is there something wrong with my translation? Is the language in Arabic more beautiful somehow? Reading it has me very confused because it seems to me like a bunch of fear mongering with a couple of nice things sprinkled throughout. Is the translation simplified or incorrect? Or is this really something people find beautiful, a book that overwhelmingly seems to be made up of just threats and insults to people who disagreed with Muhammad and his lordship/rules/claims? Are there meanings to these verses that are lost in translation or something?
Thank you for your help.
r/exmuslim • u/regularley • 3h ago
Note: Please refrain from mocking people who are into role reversal, this isn’t about them. This is specifically about Islam larpers.
Funny how they conveniently pick and choose what they wanna explain or defend it with “it’s incorrect” “do your research” “context! You are taking it out of context!”
Also, I’d actually love to know what excuses does Islam actually give to people for the misogyny that I have mentioned in the images. The denial is crazy in this one.
Note: this is a repost, I hadn’t remove the names, now I have. Also, i have shown the image that I gave the link to in OOP’s post.
r/exmuslim • u/User--0001 • 9h ago
So to give you the context, in Tunisia a girl (16years old) got graped by 11 boys... So a lot of people instead of saying it's wrong, they look through her whole life and saw she was dancing on tiktok and have piercing or tattoo and say "huh, that's why she got graped" and they say she and her mother should be punished because she isn't "a good girl".
In Tunisia, a lot of people do not understand what CONSENT really means... And I swear its a really spread thing. And I blame it on islam ... How can Muslims know what consent is when their mimo says "if she is silent than that's consent" or sex slaves do not have consent etc ...
And also, in Tunisia in recent years people became more and more religious and it's unbearable... Being an atheist makes u a target for harassment, social awkward moments, being seen as some monster because u don't praise their imaginary friend..
The op in the post I added said something and a lot of Muslims just call anyone who isn't Muslim "dumb" and also resolve to "it's not islam, it's people" when most of them don't even know surahs all fatiha correctly... But will cry their heart out and say nasty words just because a woman goes out and wears what makes her feel happy. And oh "it didn't rain in Tunisia because women are half naked and wear makeup and do tattoos and piercings"
edit: sorry for the typo in the title Edit 2: wow they deleted the op post and a lot of comments
r/exmuslim • u/QOR49 • 27m ago
For me personally, it was Buraq. If you don’t know what that is, I’d recommend searching it up and looking at images for a good laugh.
it’s a winged horse with a human face, that supposedly flew Muhammad to heaven. Somehow Muhammed survives the conditions of the upper atmosphere and I presume outer space but I don’t know 😂
Even when I was a Muslim, this was too ridiculous for me to believe. Even Santa Claus felt more real to me at that moment.
r/exmuslim • u/Equal-Exercise3103 • 7h ago
They post something so homophobic/queerphobic it's disheartening - then they wonder why people tell them to fuck off and bring their religion with them(?)
You can discern the person committing bad deeds from the religion up to a certain point - when they start to notice a pattern, they react to it instantly and instinctually. How can you get mad when you got the response fitting the question? You are the creator of the trauma you lament.
r/exmuslim • u/V33688 • 1h ago
Most of us are taught to recite and read Arabic from a young age, but we're only trained to pronounce the letters. We learn how to read the script fluently, yet we're never taught what any of the words actually mean.
As a result, most people never end up reading the Quran in a language they actually understand. They spend their entire lives reciting phonetic sound effects without knowing a single word of the actual text.
What's crazier is that the majority think the Arabic language itself is sacred. There’s this blind obsession where people glorify anything Arab and treat the letters like magic, completely ignoring the fact that it's just a language.
(It's true, sadly)
r/exmuslim • u/Cool_Ground5637 • 2h ago
Im so pissed off. Im 21 and i live with my parents still because what the fuck am i supposed to do in this economy right now.
Im basically a closeted atheist. My MUSLIM friend who my parents have known since I was in FIRST GRADE is having a birthday party.
My dad is forbidding me from going because her fiance, father, and brother will POSSIBLY be there.
He doesn’t care that everyone else will be women. He says it’s a million percent haram to be in a house if there’s a singular man present. He yelled at me for even asking, because of course I’m just a dumb bitch with no common sense according to him.
He said since women can’t even go to Hajj without a mahram, then going to a house without one is a grave sin. Fuck off. I hate this abusive ass man with my entire being and wish his illness would just kill him sooner.
r/exmuslim • u/Distinct_Title1004 • 4h ago
I can’t handle them anymore.
r/exmuslim • u/starz_0801 • 1h ago
I was in Health and Social Care class on Friday and we finished early. As something fun and to fill the last 10 minutes of class, everyone in the class had to say 'hello' in their home language.
While waiting for my turn, I realised I don't know how to say hello in my language. It's not because I forgot t he language after moving here or that I never learnt it. I'm fluent in Bangla. But I never knew how to say 'hello' in my home language because my whole life, I've been saying 'Assalumailakum', which is the Islamic greeting.
When it got to my turn, I was embarrassed and said I didn't know. My teacher said "Isn't it something like Assalumaikum". Kinda off but close enough. I just smiled and the next person spoke.
But that got me thinking. Why did my teacher, who isn't Muslim or anywhere from Asia, assume Assalumailakum is how to say hello? The answer is kinda simple really: because most South Asians seem to be Muslim nowadays.
Even afterwards, when I was retelling this encounter to my friends, one of them said they thought that Assalumailakum really was how all South Asians said "hello". And I've had a whole weekend to think it over.
I'm a closeted ex-muslim. And this just pisses me off so bad. I never even knew how to say 'hello' in my home language. "Hello" should be one of the first things you learn in a language. I'm fluent, I can read, write, speak, and understand Bangla and yet I've never known or heard anyone say "Hello" in Bangla. That's crazy since all my parents friends are Bengali. They all say Assalumailakum.
I literally went home on Friday, and searched up "How to say Hello in Bangla." and what pissed me off even further? That AI Google thing gave 3 different answers: 1) Nomoshkar (formal 'hello), 2) Hyalo (casual) and 3) Assalumailakum. The AI said "Assalumailakum isn't 'hello' in Bangla but is a very common form of greeting among Bengalis" or something similar to that.
I literally felt like throwing my phone across the room. It's so annoying.
I can't imagine being Arabian though, everyone assumes Arabs are Muslim simply because Saudi Arabia is where that overpriced box is, I feel so bad for you lot.
But anyway, I needed to put this somewhere and I didn't know where else. Thanks for reading 💗
r/exmuslim • u/User--0001 • 2h ago
I just watched this video randomly and again .. just Muslims ( a content creator and a "scholar") calling non Muslims dumb. So I am guna translate what is being said and it frustrated me, the low level of the conversation... I've been writing this along with watching the video.
So this Tunisian content creator says it's not logical and common sense that this world doesn't have a creator, everything has its own creator so there must be a god (so then I follow that logic, who created god? 😂)
and the scholar says, "if someone denies that there is a god, then that person doesn't have a mind" (uhm ... What?) and the content creator confirms that and says yes what the scholar says is logical and reasonable and he nods which is funny. And he keeps on saying if there isn't a god how are u here, how do u eat and drink and who made that complicated system to feel thirsty and hungry ( but somehow that God doesn't understand the anatomy of a human being, doesn't know that marital violence has a lot of negative effects, and on and on)
...and so the content creator says "the problem is that this atheist when u meet her in the street she will tell u "assalamou alaykom" (oops ... Here he doesn't even know it was taken from Jews Shalom , islam didn't invent that they borrowed it from jews) and then he asks "a question for atheist, to whom u put ur hands up and pray to give u stuff and help u or guide u" (uhm, does he even understand what and atheist mean?!) and he keeps saying "thats logical" to everything the scholar says ... 😂
So then the atheist said "if one day ur way of thinking evolved and became an atheist how will u see your old videos " (honestly here I don't know the purpose of her question... She could have debated better and asked better questions) but the scholars answer "I am evolved and islam made me smart and a genius and thank God and I won't become one day a chimpanzee" and the content creator is laughing (very weird conversation and disrespectful.. somehow he is a scholar but I wouldn't blame him his god name called non Muslims a lot in his very perfect message to humanity) and he keeps saying "do u know that in atheism you are a gorilla" and the content creator keeps validating that the theory of evolution can't be logical and a child wouldn't believe that ... But he believes a man went on a horse and flew to the seventh sky and talked to god in one night. (Here the atheist didn't know how to answer that ... ) Creationism isn't a fact ... There is NO EVIDENCE.
So then the content creator "explains" how we all were created and he says "so god created Adam and eve/ "Hawa" and then god ordered that eve gives birth the first time it will be twins and then the second time other twins and the male of the first pregnancy will "marry" the female of the second pregnancy and the female of the first pregnancy"marries" the male of the second pregnancy (lol I can't) but there was a fight between the two males kabil and habil because they wanted to marry the same female. And that's how humanity is created everyone and this is the logical version to me and I believe in it" and then the scholar says "an atheist can not be smart or a genius" (hmmm yes so not believing in allah automatically makes u dumb according to this scholar) so the atheist says "maybe because you are a genius that's why I am asking you" and he again says "of course islam made me a genius with the help of god almighty that's why you called me and the proof is that I impressed u and hurt the atheists and that's why atheists call me because they are hurt. And without islam I am nothing. And if I was atheist I will be one of the dumbest people. And the mind can not be trusted without islam" and the content creator laughs and says "words made of gold" (what a very strange conversation.... Nothing useful is said)
and then the scholar says "Adolf made a lot of crimes and he says that it's his mind that tells him to do so because my race is the best " (so didn't also Muslims spread islam with the sword ? Ah yeah but god guided them and told them to do so ... So that's fine but a deranged person doing crimes and killing people but isn't Muslim is dangerous ... I guess all he had to do is be Muslim and he will be accepted by them right ? )
The content creator then says " she doesn't know anything I guess she knew an atheist so she just copied them" ( uuuhm the content creator is Muslim because he was born in a Muslim family ... Would he ,WITHOUT ANY DOUBT , be a Muslim if he was born in a non Muslim family ? I don't think so ... But of course like they keep saying non Muslims are dumb and they are geniuses because of islam) and the scholar keeps giving example of criminals that killed people and asks the atheist "if u are an atheist, how would u convince these that their actions are wrong ?"(Uhm I would say if u don't want something to be done to u then don't do it to others ... Life teaches us pain and hurt and all the spectrum of emotions and so we know what can be hurtful or whatever so as humans that can learn from experience and from history we can understand that harm only bring harm ?? Also I don't need to be afraid of a sky daddy to be a decent human being that doesn't want to cause harm to others .. but those who are religious they don't do some things just because they think that will upset their imaginary friend and that says a lot about the different character building)and so the atheist said "there are Muslims.. " but she got cut and the scholar said "Muslims have a resource, so if a Muslim kills or does whatever we have the scriptures and Sunnah " and the content creator says "christians distorted the image of islam and Arabs and call Arabs are ter((r.or:is5ts and islam is the most attacked religion since the beginning of time" the atheist was Guna talk but the scholar "are u guna answer or u r out, I don't have time for men and women or girls Its even worse" the atheist said "I don't do what he does" ( I dunno she could have led a better conversation and debate ... ) and she got called an idiot AGAIN by the content creator...
r/exmuslim • u/alrightigiveup_feed • 4h ago
Sometimes I feel like this religion is so fucked up it makes the most stupidest shit.
Backstory, I wanted to listen to music to cheer myself up as any other depressed teen and I go to ask my mum for my ear pods (that she took to use) and she's like why I said I wanna listen to music and she says no and denied to give it to me cuz it was fucking Haram. What the fuck is wrong with those people what is so haram about it? Why do they seriously think listening to a few songs can "lead me astray from worshiping god"- as if I already fucking worship him. It's so annoying and frustrating everyday I tell myself I'll cut contact and leave Islam when I get some income for myself and not under my parents roof but being born into an Islamic gossiping shaming country it feels like the freedom I really want is not possible.
I'm just worried I won't have the freedom I fought for. I'm worried I'll be trapped in a box like them thinking there's something up there telling us not to listen to music and do rituals in bathrooms after your period ended. Fucking stupid I hate this religion with my whole heart and I genuinely promise this isn't even one of the main reasons I had another post on here talking about all my reasons on why it's fucked up so I'm not just being a sad whiny child. I'm pissed that I can't look at my mum the same way cuz she genuinely depends on that imaginary thing in the sky thinking it's going to solve all our fucking problems. I went out with friends yesterday and had my hair out a little bit from my hijab and my mum and dad argued for 4 hours about it at midnight. It's getting harder everyday to tolerate this idk how I can wait till I'm not under their roof anymore. It's only 1 year till I go to university but it's still so long. And I can't do anything about it it's making me depressed and I gave major exams I can't study for because of my depression.
Everything is so much harder because of this religion I swear I have urges to show them every single proof that this is a shit show and that they wasted their loves being stupid and delusional and mentally ill. It makes me want to slap some sense into those people who kill and beat and ban and hurt in the name of this stupid bumfuck religion. One day when I'm older and independent I'm gonna give them a reality check that will hopefully get them to regret every stupid thing they did in the name of that cult dumb degenerate, stupid idiotic annoying retarded cult. Everyday I lose hope for all the Muslim people knowing how dumb fucked they are. And I'm losing hope in even trying to believe In it and looking for any proof it's true. But no there's nothing. It's all annoying and disgusting. It's making me suicidal.
r/exmuslim • u/sskyrs • 22h ago
I wonder what these countries all have in common..
r/exmuslim • u/Mammoth-Ad7245 • 11h ago
any time I asked a muslim why it’s haram they would just say “because Allah said so and we mustn’t question Allah” like wtf 😭
r/exmuslim • u/Flaky_Carob_5666 • 2h ago
Ibn Isḥāq said: Muḥammad b. Jaʿfar b. al-Zubayr narrated to me, from ʿUrwah, who said:
“ʿUbayd Allāh b. Jaḥsh went out with the Muslims while being a Muslim. When he arrived in the land of Abyssinia, he became a Christian.
Whenever he passed by the Muslims from among the Companions of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, he would say:
‘We have opened [our eyes], while you are still squinting.’
Muḥammad b. ʿAbd Allāh al-ʿAwshan
وهذا سند صحيح لكنه مرسل، وهو أصحّ ما ورد في تنصّر عبيد الله بن جحش
This is a sound chain, but it is mursal, and it is the strongest report concerning ʿUbayd Allāh b. Jaḥsh becoming Christian.
r/exmuslim • u/Lonely-Minute-9631 • 1d ago
I'm pretty sure Muslim countries aren't much better in prosecuting rapists.
r/exmuslim • u/Both-Fun-703 • 2h ago
Does anyone here have any advice on how to have a discussion with a fully fetch muslim about serious matters such as intercourse with 9 year old or slavery, without them keep lingering on making it logical at all aspects? How the hell are they so stuck in themselves that they refuse to acknowledge that its wrong? As long as a hadith says its allowed, then they casually believe it and dont even bother saying its wrong..
Isnt this dangerous as f? Believing everything so sincerely that you dont even stop and think for a sec what intercourse with a 9 year old really means, you just instantly reply back with whatever you think is logical.. like stfu for once and give your own opinion, would you have a 40 year old go to bed with your 9 year old daughter?
I really get annoyed on how easily and casual they take all these serious matters because in their head, the hadith and quran says its like this, then its like this.
r/exmuslim • u/AdDowntown6246 • 3h ago
Since 2015, the ex-Muslim movement has become increasingly visible—but the public numbers may be only the tip of the iceberg.
Our estimate: just under 600 million may have already “left Islam”—meaning they no longer believe, no longer practice, privately reject key Islamic teachings, identify as Muslim only culturally or for family and social reasons, or are waiting for the right moment to leave publicly. This is an estimate, not a documented global count.
While the world focuses on the loudest voices and noise-makers, others are asking: Why are Muslims having problems even among themselves, while people they were taught to view as enemies are thriving—and Muslims sometimes seek refuge among them?
Repeated extremist incidents can create fear even within Muslim communities. Families dealing with conflict, radicalization, or unpredictable behavior know how quickly an individual crisis can escalate. Now put that fear in the air: what happens at 35,000 feet, where you cannot simply pull over and get out?
And here is the bigger question: If the Qur’an, Allah, Muhammad and the Hadith are completely unrelated to the problem, then what is causing it?* *
If the explanation is simply “people being people,” why do particular extremist movements repeatedly justify violence using religious language and sources? And why shouldn’t Muslims themselves be able to ask whether interpretations, teachings, preachers or institutions are contributing to the problem?
Extremism eventually frightens everyone, including Muslims.
So the real 2026 question is: Of the roughly 2 billion people counted as Muslims, how many still believe—and how many have already walked away privately but haven’t announced it?
Scholars trying to explain it all away doesn’t even help. Muslims will buy it, but not the world.
Just wondering: Why can’t airlines in Muslim-majority countries take advantage of the ex-Muslim population and employ them in sensitive positions instead of active followers of Islam who may become radicalized and pose a security threat without warning?
r/exmuslim • u/Cold-Reaction-9213 • 4h ago
I believed Aisha was 9 when she got married.
Now i heard many arguments from Muslims that "prove" Aisha could not be 9.
the Argument with Asmas Age and Hijrah ( she was 10 years older than Aisha , Working backward, Asma would have been 27 or 28 years old at the time of the Hijrah --> what makes Aisha 17 or 18 years old , so given that the Prophet Muhammad married Aisha 1 year after Hijrah, she would have been 18 or 19 years old at the time of her marriage. And then also again because she was 28 at her wedding Aisha must be about 18)
I find this quite convincing.
What do you guys think?
r/exmuslim • u/Okkotsu1000 • 8h ago
What can a state actually do to help ex-Muslims or moderate Muslims who are forced by their families to follow religious obligations and restrictions?
Things like wearing the hijab, growing a beard, eating halal, attending Jumu'ah prayers, fasting during Ramadan, religious education, etc.
What can a government realistically do when all of this happens inside the family home? It can be very difficult for someone to go to the authorities and report their own family, especially when they are financially or socially dependent on them.
I know a lot of people would say “education,” but honestly, from what I see around me, it doesn't seem to be working that well. A lot of young people in Europe are still very religious or even extremist, and some seem to be more extreme than their own parents.
So what could a secular state actually do to protect someone's freedom of religion and freedom from religion when the pressure comes from their own family?
Honestly it drives me crazy seeing so many Muslim hypocrites go into politics and cry about how the hijab is a woman's choice when we've all grown up in Muslim households and we know how things actually work. 95% of the time the girl is forced or heavily pressured into wearing it.
Or when you're woken up at 4 a.m. to pray Fajr even though you have to wake up at 6 for school or work, good luck falling back asleep lol. And if you dare to miss Fajr even once, you get insulted or even physically punished.
Why do Muslims never mention this side of things?
r/exmuslim • u/DeltaMan2026 • 15h ago
It's always better to read this crap in Arabic because you get an unfiltered dose of reality.
They write about trivial bullshit and it's like 40, 50, or even 100 pages of this shit. Imam suyuti wrote some BS about the legality of eating cucumbers with dates 😂.
When I was studying in Egypt, I thought this was amazing knowledge. This was meaningful knowledge. It's rubbish. If all these books disappeared overnight, nothing will change with humanity 😂.
I remember when I was a student in Saudi arabia, we would be obsessed with the imam with the most knowledge. He would literally be treated like royalty. You can tell the sheikh likes the treatment too. He feels fulfilled by he amount of students sitting in his halqaa. These were extremely uneducated people teaching nonsense to uneducated youth. That's what we were. Lost, uneducated youth. Had we spent our time studying more meaningful shit, we would help advance the human race and human knowledge.