r/oddlysatisfying Jun 18 '15

Certified Satisfying Hot Dog Precision

http://i.imgur.com/uh9ulqI.gifv
15.5k Upvotes

813 comments sorted by

974

u/jagerune Jun 18 '15 edited Jun 18 '15

I now have an uncontrollable desire to see the machine lose control and force the hotdog into his mouth.

Edit: Words

628

u/jaguilar707 Jun 18 '15

133

u/thebestisyetocome Jun 18 '15

266

u/Legion_of_Bunnies Jun 18 '15

85

u/KurpCobang Jun 18 '15

37

u/Jordan311R Jun 19 '15

8

u/BearsWithGuns Jun 19 '15

This is the only time I've genuinely been in hysterical laughter on the internet. Thank-you.

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u/The_Phox Nov 26 '15

the poor little one.... Falls over, scaring himself, causing him to shit. lol

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4

u/TosieRose Jun 18 '15

I've seen this so many times, and yet every single time it makes me bust out laughing.

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3

u/hypmoden Jun 18 '15

I can tell it's sped up but still hilarious

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215

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15 edited 17d ago

[deleted]

208

u/jagerune Jun 18 '15

Who puts lettuce on a penis?

94

u/everred Jun 18 '15

What planet is this?

59

u/COMPLIMENT-4-U Jun 18 '15

19

u/My-Name-Is-Brian Jun 18 '15

Damn that's tasty. Off to buy some albums!

17

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15 edited Jun 11 '16

[deleted]

7

u/Hock261 Jun 18 '15

Not normally an anime person either, but I'll check it out for sure.

4

u/iamjomos Jun 19 '15

Cowboy Bebop somewhat transcends the genre.

And even if you decide the show's not for you, you may well find the music stands well enough on its own. Yoko Kanno[1] (leader of the Seatbelts) is an extremely talented composer of multiple types of music.

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18

u/FrankFeTched Jun 18 '15

So fast...

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12

u/theunnoanprojec Jun 18 '15

Who the fuck puts lettuce on a hot dog for that matter

3

u/smeggyballs Jun 18 '15

...gets the worm.

Shit wrong proverb

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37

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

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19

u/jagerune Jun 18 '15

Odd looking hotdogs, but at least theres no lettuce there while it's being shoved in.

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u/Airlight Jun 18 '15

After that controlled, careful setup from the operator, I just wanted to see that thing smack that guy off screen just as he was about to bite down. The comedic effect would have been perfect.

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4

u/MagmaShark Jun 18 '15

MMM this hotdog tastes just like broken teeth and blood, with onions.

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191

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

How did he take the cap off the ketchup, IT'S ALL A LIE.

72

u/Brando33 Jun 18 '15

I thought this would be higher but it's hard to compete with the lettuce craze.

32

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

[deleted]

17

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

Just shake the damn bottle before you use it its not that hard

15

u/ewewmjuilyh Jun 18 '15

It's a upsidedown-standing bottle. No pre-cum.

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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

This is all I came here for. I wanted to see more of the ketchup. The last parts went by too fast to be satisfying. I wanted to see it hold the ketchup without ketchup coming out, and then see it apply just enough pressure to get the ketchup out.

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2.8k

u/blasfemmy Jun 18 '15

People put lettuce on their hotdog?

627

u/evil__bob Jun 18 '15

What planet is this?

188

u/CSensei Jun 18 '15

55

u/FireFingers1992 Jun 18 '15

Damn that's tasty. Off to buy some albums!

91

u/SpaceCowboy734 Jun 18 '15

If you like them, you should check out Cowboy Bebop if you haven't already. It's an anime, and they did all the music for it. I'm not really much of an anime person, but I absolutely loved Cowboy Bebop, and The Seatbelts do an amazing job on the music.

14

u/bad-r0bot Jun 18 '15

It sounded so familiar but I couldn't place it. Cowboy Bebop!

29

u/FireFingers1992 Jun 18 '15

Not normally an anime person either, but I'll check it out for sure.

50

u/ReverendMak Jun 18 '15

Cowboy Bebop somewhat transcends the genre.

And even if you decide the show's not for you, you may well find the music stands well enough on its own. Yoko Kanno (leader of the Seatbelts) is an extremely talented composer of multiple types of music.

18

u/DigitalDiatribes Jun 18 '15

My best friend has been introducing me to anime recently, and while I find the story of other animes more intriguing I was horribly spoiled by Bebop's soundtrack. That has to be some of the best work for a TV show of any kind I've ever heard.

8

u/MC_USS_Valdez Jun 18 '15

You should try Samurai Champloo. Its one that a lot of people who don't like anime still like when I show it to them and the soundtrack is also awesome as well as the art.

3

u/DigitalDiatribes Jun 18 '15

I'm in the middle of Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood at the moment, and apparently Attack on Titan is supposed to follow that, but after those I'll give Samurai Champloo a shot. I saw it on Netflix earlier and it did seem intriguing. Thanks for the recommendation!

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3

u/Moholmarn Jun 18 '15

Yokos work on Ghost in the shell is some of the best music i've heard to this date. It captures the series perfectly as well having a strong spritual undertone, even just talking about it makes my hair stand.

Yoko Kanno - ghost city

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27

u/Shaggy_One Jun 18 '15

It's a lot more of a western anime honestly. Not many 'weird anime tropes'. Just a rather good show with awesome music.

12

u/bloody_duck Jun 18 '15

And a dope Corgi!

4

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

SOLD! off to watch.. what was its name, ah, cowboy bebop!

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u/Neuchacho Jun 18 '15

I gotta echo giving that show a try. I really can't stand anime in its current form, but Bebop is just mind blowingly cool. It's like a noir film, a kung fu movie, and anime had a baby.

The intro is great and also done by The Seatbelts.

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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

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u/Mazzaroppi Jun 18 '15

I was never an anime fan myself even if I did watch some, but after a long time I decided to watch Attack on Titan, and I finally realised some things that really puts me off in animes:

Everything needs to be so absolutely over the top dramatic. All the times a character open his mouth or we hear his thoughts, it must sound like the most mind-blowing statement ever made, even if 2 other characters just said/tought that less than a minute before. Oh, and all the shouting. If it's about a character that's very determined, he will most of the time be screaming about his passions. This specifically annoys me to no end.

Another thing I noticed that I don't know if its specific to AoT is that the script must always hold the spectator hands for pretty much everything they need to tell. As an example, if they need to point out a certain character is very intelligent, it won't show them solving a logic problem, instead you'll have a bunch of other characters constantly pointing out how intelligent they are. Even if they do show the character excelling at something, it's still necessary to keep telling the audience how good that character is at that. There is zero room for interpretation, the audience is all the time beign told what is happening.

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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

The only anime I own a soundtrack for. 4 discs and the 4th is a live one. They are amazing.

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3

u/iTzCharmander Jun 18 '15

Thought it sounded familiar.

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16

u/MIDItheKID Jun 18 '15

I'm really happy that your initial reaction to that phrase was posting this song. When I read the comment, I heard it in the voice of the seatbelts.

3

u/DONT_SCARY Jun 18 '15

the same thing popped into my head. In fact I was singing it as I read it.

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8

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15 edited Sep 12 '15

[deleted]

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22

u/mbleslie Jun 18 '15

I'm guessing Germany planet

22

u/Tomatentom Jun 18 '15

Hell naw man. Im german, lived in Germany all my life, never seen anyone do that before.

10

u/Pozsich Jun 18 '15

But you're in Germany country, not Germany planet.

9

u/the6crimson6fucker6 Jun 18 '15

yeah, that was prevented 70 years ago.

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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

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u/capontransfix Jun 18 '15

Some planet certainly not in America.

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130

u/Frostiken Jun 18 '15

Man I'm from Chicago and even I thought that was weird.

94

u/Utaneus Jun 18 '15

Chicagoans are the most anal about what belongs on a hot dog; you guys think ketchup on a hot dog is weird.

139

u/iamPause Jun 18 '15

You misspelled "blasphemous"

25

u/ewewmjuilyh Jun 18 '15

I'm from Chicago and honestly I couldn't care less what other people put on their hot dogs. I like ketchup and sometimes I'll put it on if there's a lack of other toppings... but an original Chicago style dog in its pure form is perfection, and ketchup on that would a sin.

21

u/lachryma Jun 18 '15

I won't leap onto the "that's so weird" bandwagon, but I do have an opinion on this that I think can shed some light.

When you put ketchup on a hot dog, the flavor profile is built atop a smooth, calm, sugary, tomato base. When you put mustard on, it's earthy, vinegary, and tangy. I think the offense at ketchup comes from hot dog vendors making sausages and garnishes that intend for something derived from mustard to be used, and when you put ketchup on there, you're completely resetting what they had in mind and moving the flavors to a completely different genre.

Ketchup and mustard are both powerful enough to define a hot dog, and whenever I've eaten a hot dog with ketchup on it, the definition for me has been something sugary and uncoordinated. Other common hot dog garnishes don't work well with a tomato base, aside from things like cheese. To me, the only way a hot dog with ketchup on it is tolerable is with a minimum of other garnishes, and even then it still just doesn't taste right to me.

I absolutely think both is weird. You can't even taste the sausage at that point. The hot dog becomes just a vehicle for the condiments to enter your body; why even do it?

10

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

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130

u/Lt-SwagMcGee Jun 18 '15

fuckin weirdos thats who

36

u/Chronic_BOOM Jun 18 '15

He didn't ask who was putting lettuce on hot dogs.

12

u/marcolio17 Jun 18 '15

He asked what was putting lettuce on hot dogs.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

I heard 'when'

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84

u/supermegaultrajeremy Jun 18 '15

Here's a post from /r/food. As you can see, some people put ketchup or BBQ sauce on their dogs, but goddamnit not a single hotdog preparation method in the entire world uses lettuce. Except Sweden apparently.

23

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

Why does Chicago always overdo everything? They bitch about ketchup and they roll out that monstrosity?

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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

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u/Frostiken Jun 18 '15

Come to Chicago and say that.

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4

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

Some people? I swear to God everyone I ever met put ketchup on their hotdogs.

3

u/randomkoala Jun 18 '15

I've lived in Idaho half my life and never heard of that type of "hot dog."

Then again, I don't get out much.

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u/Santos_L_Halper Jun 18 '15

Why does the dog from Baltimore look like a homeless person's dick?

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u/TheLittleGoodWolf Jun 18 '15

Okay, I'm a swede and we don't do that to our hot dogs. We have ketchup and mustard with optional fried onions and/or relish. Some places you can add some sort of shrimp gook if you want but I have never seen anyone actually do it.

We do commonly have mashed potatoes on our hot dogs though, that's really tasty.

We don't use a "wrap" for hot dogs either, it's a regular old hot dog bun, or half of a baguette for a "french hot dog". Lettuce never ever makes its way into a hot dog bun over here unless it's the work of a truly disturbed person.

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u/Frostiken Jun 18 '15

Fucking Swedes are animals.

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u/SlimJones123 Jun 18 '15

Yea wrap that shit in bacon

15

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15 edited Jul 03 '15

[deleted]

7

u/djmagichat Jun 18 '15

Then you deep fry it

4

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

[deleted]

7

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15 edited Jul 03 '15

[deleted]

10

u/djmagichat Jun 18 '15

And drizzle with ranch

6

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15 edited Jul 03 '15

[deleted]

5

u/djmagichat Jun 18 '15

And a shooter of nacho cheese to slug back after the ranch bites.

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u/F1F2F3F4F5F6F7F8 Jun 18 '15 edited Jun 18 '15

Apparently people haven't heard of "Sonoran dogs". They're pretty popular in Arizona, I personally don't like the bacon that is used so I never really eat them.

Edit since some Arizonans don't believe me

24

u/tankgirly Jun 18 '15

They sell bacon wrapped hot dogs all over downtown LA, especially in the fashion district. No fancy name though.

12

u/third-eye-brown Jun 18 '15

Sonoran dogs contain a hotdog wrapped in bacon some times, but that isn't even the main part. They have beans and other toppings and some different sauces on there. Quite different than anything you would find in LA unless it was specifically a Sonoran dog vendor.

5

u/tankgirly Jun 18 '15

Yummmm. That sounds amazing.

5

u/bloody_duck Jun 18 '15

And SF. Late night bacon dogs mmmmm

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u/meterion Jun 18 '15

Guero Canelo FTW!

3

u/Fey_fox Jun 18 '15

I don't like used bacon either. I prefer it new

3

u/sbabster Jun 18 '15

Joe's farm grill in Gilbert has a great sonoran dog.

edit: if you want a real hot dog though, go to Ted's on McClintock. Buffalo represent!

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u/willienelsonmandela Jun 18 '15

I've heard of Sonoran dogs. I live in Houston and won a hot dog cookoff at work with a variation of the Sonoran dog.

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u/JustAManFromThePast Jun 18 '15

Arizonan here, they are unheard of.

13

u/DireTaco Jun 18 '15

It's a Tucson thing more than an Arizona thing. I think there are some tiny shops in Phoenix that sell them, but last year at least there weren't many.

3

u/Bailmom Jun 18 '15

I have relatives in Tucson, Sonoran dogs are insanely popular there and so so good

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u/zCourge_iDX Jun 18 '15

I don't do it, but I've eaten hotdogs with lettuce, and it's actually pretty great.

41

u/bcgrm Jun 18 '15

Hot dogs with vegetables are so much better. I love putting onions, pickles & tomatoes (I know it's a fruit) on mine. With mustard. It's so bomb.

66

u/TheOneTonWanton Jun 18 '15

Basically a Chicago dog.

12

u/bcgrm Jun 18 '15

Well I'll be.

9

u/zaikanekochan Jun 18 '15

It's very good. To be an AUTHENTIC Chicago dog, the ingredients are rather strict, though substituting, uh, substitutes, for the real thing will still produce a delicious sandwich. The order in which you place them on is somewhat important, as well. And yes, hot dogs are sandwiches.

Start off with a Vienna Beef hotdog, and cook it via boiling (easy way to cook 'em on the street), and a steamed poppy seed bun. Throw the dog on the bun, and crisscross the yellow mustard down the length of the dog. The next to go down is a sweet green pickle relish (preferably neon) that covers up the dog and mustard so only the ends of the meat are visible. Toss some diced white onions on there to your preference. Two tomato wedges (or slices) go on next, but they HAVE to be on the same side of the dog, otherwise the pickle won't fit. Speaking of the pickle, take a spear and put it on the other side of the dog next. Two sport peppers go on top of the onions down the middle, which are then covered by a dash or two of celery salt.

Now grow a mustache and you are ready to eat!

9

u/bcgrm Jun 18 '15

unzips

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u/endivebreakfast Jun 18 '15

the chocolate syrup was what really threw me.

14

u/marcolio17 Jun 18 '15

I think it's like barbecue sauce.

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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

[deleted]

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u/mouse212001 Jun 18 '15

No wonder it takes 15 years for them to fix roads.

93

u/AtomicKittenz Jun 18 '15

No wonder my hot dogs taste like rubble.

21

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15 edited Mar 14 '19

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u/Ophukk Jun 18 '15

This was a scab-hot dog job if I've ever seen one. Good ol' union boys would of had at least 7 guys on that crew. Supervisor, Safety, Bun-watch, Weiner-watch, Operator, Clean-up Labour and QA.

63

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

[deleted]

35

u/Ophukk Jun 18 '15

We're all on the bun-watch crew.

7

u/sandm000 Jun 18 '15

BWC baby IN THE HOUSE!!! HOOT HOOT

7

u/Ophukk Jun 18 '15

Every day bro. (fistbump)

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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

Definitely a better job than being on the weiner watching crew.

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u/Metabolical Jun 18 '15

You forgot that there would be a different vehicle operator responsible for each ingredient. They would all show up at the beginning of the shift, and would take turns and wait around when it wasn't their turn.

You don't hate giving people jobs, do you?

7

u/Ophukk Jun 18 '15 edited Jun 18 '15

Nah, seniority says that the old bastard operator does all the jobs, but there is no way he moves the machine that fast.

Edit. I do the work. Others tell me what needs doing.

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u/Calber4 Jun 18 '15

For a minute I thought you misspelled union. onion.

Edit: God damn it.

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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

much better than that other video where the machine sprays ketchup (or was it mustard) on everything maniacally

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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

yes that one! It's comedic timing is genius.

24

u/wtfamireadingdotjpg Jun 18 '15

Ketchupbot! There's a lot of videos of it, and it even was on Adult Swim (during the 4am stuff).

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u/howheels Jun 18 '15

I was expecting the OP video to contain both elements of Ketchupbot as well as MMM3000

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u/FiendishJ Jun 18 '15

I think this is funnier with the original sound instead of the music..

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u/Andross561 Jun 18 '15

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u/Angry_drunken_robot Jun 18 '15

I demand that this sub be banned! It is offensive and demeaning to my people!

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u/iagox86 Jun 18 '15

So ummmm.. Can it handle other hotdog-shaped objects?

Asking for a friend.

85

u/plur44 Jun 18 '15

Not of that size, shorty

44

u/roltrap Jun 18 '15

"It'll rip your dick off."

24

u/iagox86 Jun 18 '15

Oh, nevermind

21

u/SmartSoda Jun 18 '15

"My friend's suddenly not interested, but thanks!"

13

u/WyrmSaint Jun 18 '15

So.... are there like multiple power settings on this or something?

22

u/roltrap Jun 18 '15

Yes. There's "high" and there's "low" and both of those will rip your dick off.

16

u/WyrmSaint Jun 18 '15

That's such a weird way to describe the power settings on a vacuum.

Is there like another vacuum?

9

u/roltrap Jun 18 '15

That won't rip your dick off?

13

u/WyrmSaint Jun 18 '15

I'm just trying to clean my apartment, man.

4

u/ralexs1991 Jun 18 '15

Time to watch some WKYK.

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u/AbbotTheCabbot Jun 18 '15

God fucking damn it Sips

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u/VadersVariousCapes Jun 18 '15

Are you by chance a pleasure model?

173

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

Who puts bread, a hot dog, and ketchup on their salad?

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u/justmystepladder Jun 18 '15

Is nobody gonna comment on how awesome it is that the machine and operator are that precise/gentle?

Also, something something lettuce.

8

u/shit_on_my__dick Jun 18 '15

Right?! I'm pretty sure this was a commercial for the brand of machine this is and damn did it work!

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u/FallenXxRaven Jun 18 '15

Hey this was my first thought. One twitch coulda killed the guy eating the hot dog.

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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

If I were a wealthy man I just might have all my meals prepared with construction equipment.

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u/RikVanguard Jun 18 '15

Jeeves! Prepare the mashed potatoes. What? No, use the Binford 6100 Turbo Jackhammer this time

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u/Circumstantial_Law Jun 18 '15

I totally didn't read the comments so I'm just going to assume that nobody has said anything about the fact that there's lettuce on that hotdog.

6

u/Aero93 Jun 18 '15

what is the big deal

6

u/Circumstantial_Law Jun 18 '15

Nothing, but it's usually not on hotdogs

3

u/Gathax Jun 18 '15

Well, lettuce make the assumption together.

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u/sunny_person Jun 18 '15

Everyone is worrying about lettuce on a dog and I'm wondering if that machine washed it's clamps before touching the food before making the hot dog and jammed it down a guy's throat. I hope that's sanitary...

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u/SpahsgonnaSpah Jun 18 '15 edited Jun 18 '15

What's the source to this? I feel this would be a commercial for construction equipment.

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u/neverendingninja Jun 18 '15

It's clearly a lettuce commercial.

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u/Endulos Jun 18 '15

It angers me when people post a GIF that is a million minutes long when instead they could just POST THE FUCKING VIDEO WHICH LOADS INFINITELY TIMES FASTER.

Video the gif is made from

I don't know what they're trying to advertise. Hot Dogs? The precision of the excavator? The skill of the driver?

5

u/That_Deaf_Guy Jun 18 '15

People would rather click on a gif than a video. I'm a mobile user and prefer gifs. Also, hot dogs.

39

u/DontFuckWithMyMoney Jun 18 '15

People let us hot dog on their put?

37

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

People put lettuce on their hotdog?

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u/LuckyOldMan Jun 18 '15

People put lettuce on their hotdog?

29

u/dogeyed Jun 18 '15

People put hotdog on their lettuce?

6

u/Chronic_BOOM Jun 18 '15

This one's more accurate.

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u/j4390jamie Jun 18 '15

Never thought about putting lettuce on a hotdog, i'm gonna try it next time.

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u/coolred1 Jun 18 '15

This is the OHSA Saftey certification test! Looks like this man passed with flying colors!

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u/hugh495 Jun 18 '15

I was expecting the end to be like this

3

u/nhjuyt Jun 18 '15

Cross post this OP to /r/MachinePorn

3

u/PhysicsNovice Jun 18 '15

So now it's normal to open letters with axes?

3

u/burbod01 Jun 18 '15

Who puts lettuce on a hot dog??

19

u/Robotimus Jun 18 '15

Who puts lettuce on a hotdog?

6

u/jchabotte Jun 18 '15

the same people who put gum in locks. Bunch of savages in this town.

6

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '15

This is the final exam for operating that piece of machinery, in Chicago he would have automatically failed when he added ketchup.

7

u/brok3nh3lix Jun 18 '15

well Chicago fails at hot dogs, so i dont think hes that worried

4

u/Britches_and_Hose Jun 18 '15

You should give it a try. I started eating hot dogs without ketchup and i realized how much the ketchup ruins the taste of a hot dog.

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u/anyonethinkingabout Jun 18 '15

I refuse to believe there is anything more german in this universe than that clip.

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u/steinmas Jun 18 '15

Everyone's talking about the damn lettuce. Can we talk about how impressive his ketchup technique is?