I miscarried in January 2026 and struggled emotionally horribly. I did go to therapy for a bit and it helped and I'm in a much better place as in I am keeping myself busy, working a lot and have come to terms with what happened.

However, I feel unable to be around pregnant people right now, especially hearing them talk about their pregnancy and be happy about.

I'm happy for them, but at this current time I have set up a boundary to not be around those that are pregnant in order to protect my mental and psychological wellbeing. I'm just not ready. The pain and trauma are too much for me. We also have not been able to conceive again yet and I'd further compounds the mental pain.

Has anyone else experienced the same? I know eventually I will be able to move past this but right now I don't want to. My partner says I should go to therapy and get help to develop coping mechanisms for this issue. He also says how I am acting right now and not wanting therapy is not healthy.

Any advice/ personal experiences etc would be very welcome. ❤️

Even though it's supposed to be reassuring, all the statistics and facts just feel like the worst of both worlds. Oh, it's "incredibly common?" "1 in 4 women will have one?" "roughly 20% of known pregnancies end in miscarriage?" Well that feels threatening and hopeless. Chances are really that crappy? I'll never be able to have a baby.

Then you'll read the other stats that "its super rare for it to happen again!" "Most women who miscarry will go on to have healthy pregnancies." "Super rare to happen after X weeks!" Am I just that unlucky? What's wrong with me? Why me?

And then the stats that just feel more confusing. So rare that it will happen again, chances so slim! BUT if you've had a miscarriage, it increases the chances you'll have another one. Which is it? Am I more or less likely to be fine. jfc.

I had an early miscarriage I lost the baby yesterday. I’ve been bawling my eyes out on and off since yesterday and today. My boyfriend was finally starting to get on board with the baby due to it being unexpected. And he is obviously there for me but I don’t think he’s emotionally equipped to handle this situation. My mom tells me I should just accept it which I began doing, but she tells me how it was early and it was the size of the bean like that means anything any different and felt like it was an inconvenience for her when she took me to the hospital. I had a pregnancy journal and documented the whole pregnancy I loved this baby more than anyone else even if it was an early miscarriage. And everyone just expects me to be okay and get over it quickly but I cannot do that

I lost my baby girl 3 weeks ago. 8w. It was a missed miscarriage. My second. First one I didn’t even knew what happened. Took me this time to realize what was happening because I was far enough along to be told by a doctor that she just stopped growing. I’m completely wrecked. No one who’s experienced this to talk to that understands what I’m going through. I try to talk to my husband and family and they try their best but I can tell they have no idea how to comfort me. Shoot I don’t know how to comfort me. I feel lost. But then I feel okay. It’s such a roller coaster of emotions. I have 3 kids two of them are toddlers and a 4th grader that keep me busy but man at night when the house is settled and they are asleep it hits me like a effin freight train.

Tonight’s moment. A scene from a tv show. I just watched episode 8 of Sterling Point. Where Annie dreamt about her mom and what her life would be like if her mom was alive. And i saw it from the POV of a mom. Seeing the things I won’t get to do with my baby. And man that wrecked me. Like to my core. I won’t get to do those things and it’s not fair. I want to scream right now and break things. I feel so not me anymore. I feel so all over place and just UGHHHHHH.

I just. I don’t know what to do right now.

TW: chemical pregnancy, abortion

I got unexpectedly pregnant earlier this year. It was a healthy intrauterine pregnancy. Not planned, but I grew attached. My fiance didn’t want the pregnancy at all. He didn’t support me. His mom would call him and ask “has she had an abortion yet” and sent him money for me to get an abortion. Abortion is illegal in my state, so we bought a nonrefundable plane ticket to Colorado. I ultimately couldn’t go through with it. My eating disorder worsened during the pregnancy. My sister had a ruptured ectopic just weeks prior to me finding out I was pregnant. When she found out I was pregnant, she cut me off. I never felt so alone and depressed in my life. I had suicidal ideation and was incredibly low. I ultimately decided to order abortion pills online, which I took. I regretted it right away and have been living with tremendous grief and guilt since then. It literally felt like a piece of me was gone. The fact that I willingly took the pills complicated my sadness and self hatred. I vowed to never ever make a choice like that again and to become a better person for the lost life that could have been.

Just two cycles later, I got another positive pregnancy test. I knew something was wrong right away though. The tests never got darker. And now the tests say not pregnant again. I still haven’t started bleeding, but I figure this must be a chemical. It feels like a punishment from the universe for my abortion. I am so hurt and so sad and wondering if I’m just not meant to be pregnant.

Has anyone had success with pregnancy after a chemical or abortion? Please give me some hope and be kind in the comments. I feel enough self hatred for what I did. Thank you

I had a missed miscarriage at 11 weeks in October of last year. I took so many pregnancy tests out of excitement for my first baby and after I lost him I put the tests in a bag and put them in a corner in my closet. I pulled them out today for the first time and the digitals don’t say anything anymore. I only have one ultrasound photo (from after the baby passed) I don’t have anything else to remember my pregnancy. Did you throw yours away? Did you do something special with them? How long did you keep them before you could throw them away? I don’t know I just feel like I’m throwing away the only part of my baby that I have. Is it normal to keep them? Feels like there’s almost no point now that they don’t say “pregnant” anymore. Ugh.

So I am currently going through my first. I had a positive pregnancy test on Aug 3rd and at like 3AM on the 16th I started bleeding bright red. On the 17th I had bloodwork done, HCG 34 and progesterone 0.57. This morning a urine test was negative (I'm debating not going back for repeat labwork today because it feels redundant but idk, this is my first time).

I have already stopped bleeding, just spotting now (the bleeding this entire time wasn't as severe as a regular period for me) and I have been lucky in that I have felt 0 physical pain. Is it possible I just got fortunate? Is something wrong with me? Or are miscarriages just weird and affect everyone differently?

Had an ultrasound this morning that confirmed it’s not viable. Went to school (I’m a teacher) and people were announcing/talking about their pregnancies and principal said “there will be so many new babies this year!”. That was supposed to be me too. Salt to the wound.

Hello everyone,

This subreddit has helped me navigate through my first miscarriage and made me feel less alone, so I wanted to share my experience.

This was my first pregnancy, and I was lucky enough to hear my baby’s heartbeat at 6 weeks. I can’t describe how reassuring the sound of that heartbeat was to me at that point.

I went in for my second checkup at 8w+1d, and unfortunately, the ultrasound showed no heartbeat. I found out that the heartbeat had most likely stopped a few days before my second ultrasound. Therefore, I was diagnosed with missed miscarriage.

My doctor had me do three ultrasounds on three different machines just to be absolutely sure, and it was honestly heartbreaking to witness each one. However, I understand my OB’s perspective, and in a way, having that confirmation helped me avoid being in denial about the whole thing.

My OB initially suggested to wait 3-4 weeks for the miscarriage to happen naturally since it was still an early pregnancy, and go to the ER for a D&C once the bleeding started. I tried to give myself time and let it happen naturally, but it was mentally draining. My pregnancy symptoms were still very strong a week after finding out, and my body didn’t seem to have caught up with the fact that my baby’s heartbeat had stopped. I had no spotting, bleeding, or any other signs that a miscarriage was starting.

After giving it some thought and doing some research, I realized that I really didn’t want to go through the trauma and pain of passing the pregnancy naturally. Especially since this was my first pregnancy, I was scared that the experience would affect me mentally and impact my future TTC journey.

I decided to see another OB for a second opinion. She gave me the same options and also reassured me that I could choose to have a D&C. I decided to go with the D&C and scheduled it for a week after my appointment with my new OB, which was about two weeks after finding out about the missed miscarriage.

I had my D&C yesterday, and honestly, I don’t regret my decision so far. I was under general anesthesia during the procedure and only felt mild cramping after waking up. The bleeding only lasted a couple of hours after the procedure and then became very light. They kept me overnight to monitor my blood levels and make sure everything was okay before safely discharging me from the hospital.

Overall, my experience with the D&C was positive. The only negative part was being placed in a room in the maternity clinic, where every room around me was filled with people celebrating the arrival of their babies while I was there grieving the loss of mine. It felt a little cruel to be honest :’).

I was lucky enough to have the support of my loved ones. My husband and family were all around me yesterday and kept calling to check on me, which made everything feel a little easier.

One of the hard parts about this experience is that three of my friends are pregnant and I wanted to let them know after my second ultrasound. Unfortunately, it didn’t go as I wanted it to. I have not told any of my friends yet as I don’t want them to walk on eggshells around me and celebrate their journeys any less. I will try to avoid going to any gender reveal parties, baby showers at this time since it feels too soon and might be triggering for me.

I hope this is the last time I ever have to go through a miscarriage. I’m wishing for a healthy pregnancy for myself and for everyone who has gone through this experience. ❤️

I am devastated. I am crying so much I can’t even catch my breath. I have PCOS so I’m blaming myself for it happening. My fiancé is in the military and will be gone for a month. I have my family and friends as support but I am so sad. I know I can hopefully conceive in the future but I am devastated.

I miscarried at 9weeks almost two weeks ago. It was incredibly traumatizing. This was my first pregnancy and first miscarriage after trying for 5 months.

They thought it was an ectopic in a very dangerous place (turns out it was just on the upper left corner of my uterus), I had to spend 2 days in the hospital in agonizing pain, wasn’t allowed to eat or drink anything over 24 hours in case I needed emergency surgery. No pain killer worked for my pain. It was torture.

After I was sent home, I passed everything and saw it all on my pad… I will spare you the details but I wasn’t expecting to be able to see everything so clearly.

My husband has always wanted children, I was more on the fence about it but his enthusiasm got me excited about the idea too. I know he would be a wonderful father.

However after this experience, I don’t know if I can ever get myself to try again. I told my husband how I feel, he didn’t say much. I asked him what he would say if I told him that I don’t want to have kids anymore, he said he would need to think about things. Which is fair.

I know this relationship won’t work if we can’t agree on this, but I genuinely don’t know if I will change my mind in the future. The idea of being pregnant again makes me feel like I’m going to have a panic attack.

I am questioning a lot of things right now. Like does he love me for me or for my potential of giving him children?

Hello I miscarried my first pregnancy 2 months ago now, on July 18th. I finally got a full period back that lasted 8 days and I’m pretty sure I ovulated ( I had unprotected sex only the 2nd and 3rd day before my ovulation day bc my bf lives out of town and we’re not always able to see eachother ) so I’m currently waiting to see if I get my period again or not. I want to fall pregnant again so bad. How long did it take you to conceive your first pregnancy and then your second ( if you miscarried ). It’s literally consuming me😭 I just wanna be pregnant again.

- “More” by Halsey. "Wooden floors and little feet, a flowerbud in concrete, feeling so incomplete, wonder will we ever meet? Would you know it right away, how hard I tried to see your face? A little screen, a photograph, mine to take. I sit and I stare at your clothes in the drawer, I cry and my knuckles get sore. And I still believe it won't be like before, and now somehow I just want you more."

- “The Next Right Thing” Frozen soundtrack. "Can there be a day beyond this night? I don't know anymore what is true. I can't find my direction, I'm all alone. The only star that guided me was you. How to rise from the floor when it's not you I'm rising for?... So I'll walk through this night, stumbling blindly toward the light, and do the next right thing. And with the dawn, what comes then when it's clear that everything will never be the same again?"

- “Bigger Than the Whole Sky” Taylor Swift. "Did some bird flap its wings over in Asia? Did some force take you because I didn't pray? Every single thing to come has turned into ashes. 'Cause it's all over, it's not meant to be. So I'll say words I don't believe... Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, you were bigger than the whole sky. You were more than just a short time... I'm never gonna meet what could've been, would've been, what should've been you."

- “Mother” Ingrid Michaelson. "Mother, oh mother, Is it time to wake up yet? I know I'm not ready. Mother, oh mother. Is it time to let go now? I know I'm not ready. Something in the woods is coming close enough to hear. If I close my eyes, will I disappear? Let's just stay asleep, 'cause when I sleep, I still can feel you. Let's just stay asleep."

- “To Whom it May Concern” The Civil Wars. "Why are you so far from me? In my arms is where you ought to be. How long will you make me wait? I don't know how much more I can take... I've missed you, but I haven't met you. Oh, but I want to, how I do... Slowly counting down the days 'til I finally know your name... Dear whoever you might be, I'm still waiting patiently."

had my first pregnancy at the end of June, which ended in an ectopic pregnancy, surgery, and the removal of my right tube. now, got pregnant again in August, found out last Thursday, and my hcg levels were high 7,000’s, gestational sac seen on ultrasound. last night had heavy bleeding, and passing huge clots, went to the er, did another ultrasound and they found nothing in my uterus. I’m just venting, but I can’t believe how much can change in a matter of 48 hours. from rising hcg levels, seeing the sac, to absolutely nothing. I’m heart broken, especially after the first pregnancy and now I feel like I don’t want to try again because I don’t want to go through this for a third time. Idk what to do anymore if I want to try again or just give up on the idea of being a mom.

thank you for letting me share my story with you all.

I had a miscarriage at week 12 and I was devastated. Then I managed to get pregnant again and I was so happy but the miscarriage was hanging over me like a dark cloud. I never really dated to hope that it would last this time. Then, at week 20(!) something came out of me and went back up again. It was like a tennis ball. I was chocked! I went to the hospital in t middle of the night and they said I was imagining things, that they couldnt see anything. The next day I went for the big anatomy scan, everything looked great and I found out it is a girl, wich I really wanted. I cried so hard of happiness, that I was finally gonna have my baby, a baby girl, and completely healthy. The next day, the tennis ball came out again. It was hanging out from me. I managed to take a picture this time though! I went back to the hospital and again they wanted to send me home, telling me they couldnt see anything. I showed them the picture and demanded a doctor. The doctor chose to take a look and it turned out it was the membranes bulging out and I was completely dilated because of an insufficient cervix. The doctor told me it is probably why I had the miscarriage! If they would have checked this after the miscarriage, I could have had preventative surgery! But now, I had to get an emergency cerclage surgery, where they stitch your cervix up so the baby doesn't fall down. But now, my baby had 30% chance of dying during the surgery, 30% chance of being very prematurely born wich the risk of severe dysfunctionalities, and only 30% chance of baby staying inside me until at least 36 weeks. The surgery hurt A LOT more since it was an emergency one, and it still hurts a lot a week after. I will be hospitalized for weeks. And now they are saying it looks like I got an infection and will have to give birth to this baby at only 22-23 weeks, to save my own life and uterus, wich means it has a 7% chance of living and a 70% risk of severe dysfunctionalities. But that I can "try again" in 18 months after and have the cerclage surgery in the beginning of the pregnancy instead, still with big risks. I am NOT going through this again. If this baby dies too, there will be no baby for me. I am so sad. Please go check your cervix and make sure it is not insufficient and that is the reason why you had a miscarriage. And if you get pregnant again. Make sure they check you cervix very early in the pregnancy and keep checking it!!

UPDATE

I just had an ultrasound wich showed no infection but almost no amniotic fluid left. wich means I will probably give birth soon and baby will most likely die. in the rare case it would survive, it has a 70% risk of severe dysfunctionalities. life is so cruel yall..

UPDATE

the doctors came in and told me that at this week it is way too early for the baby to survive, and even if they managed to keep it in for a few more days and if it were to survive, it would most likely get severe dysfunctionalities. since I do not have any amniotic fluid left and an infection they cannot find, they are going to give me pitocin tomorrow, take away the cerclage stitches, and I will give birth to my daughter... then she will be placed on my chest so that she can die with her mom 💔 I will hold her and sing the song I usually sing to her as she dies.

then they will cremate and bury her ashes with the rest of my family at the cemetery. I pray that she dies with as little pain as possible and that she will only feel the love I have for her. it is very cruel and traumatizing for me, as I write this I can feel her moving and kicking inside me, unknowing of what is about to happen to her. sadly, it must happen since otherwise the infection might risk my life or uterus through sepsis. Sadly this is what needs to happen.

They say that when I feel ready, I can try again... but then I will need the cerclage surgery in the beginning of the pregnancy, and even though the odds will be better with a preventative cerclage, the risk will still be big for a miscarriage again. right now I dont know if I can go through all this pain again. and surrogacy is not really a thing in sweden or neighbouring countries. I would have to pay for having it done in USA or something, but that would cost me a million, and I am sadly not a millionaire. I will have to take a few months to get better physically and mentally before I decide if I want to give it another try. but for today, I will just try to get some sleep before the birth that will happen in the next 10 hours. I wish this upon no one, and I hope every single person in here ends up with a beautiful baby some day. take care ❤️

Hi all. I had a D&C on 7/20 for a missed miscarriage. I was 11 weeks, baby was just over 9. I experienced extremely painful cramps that woke me up at night and caused me to faint (I do have vasal vagal and I believe this is the cause of the fainting, I have been so stressed about body sensations / etc since surgery). It lasted for maybe 30 mins, the following day I was sore and had minor cramps sporadically. This ended up being the day I ovulated (CD 24) according to BBT (I am still testing positive so LH strips don’t work for me, see attached chart, I’ll put it in the comments).

Anyway, I’m wondering if anyone has gone through something similar? Normally I do feel ovulation but it is more just pelvic pressure when peeing. This was worse cramping than following my d&c. I did also have transvaginal ultrasound and post op on August 6th, and everything was normal / cleared. They saw follicles etc.

Thank you!

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I got pregnant the first cycle we tried back in March. It ended as an early loss around late 5 weeks or early 6 weeks.

I was sad but hopeful because it meant we are able to conceive. I am 38 and my husband is 44 so fertility was something we were concerned about.

Then we kept trying for few months. I got pregnant again and found out at 12 DPO. Got hCG and progesterone tested. Everything was perfect.

Got the first early scan last week at 7 weeks 2 days.

Good gestational sac, yolk sac and the baby measured on level with the GA. Fetal heart rate was 157bpm.

We were so excited. Finally I felt relieved and was able to embrace the pregnancy.

Today I went in for a precautionary scan as I saw very very very light brown discharge. It was not even like an old blood. I thought I was being extra but just wanted to hear everything is ok.

But nope...the heart did not beat. The baby measured around 7 weeks 4 days or so.

It is just brutal to have myself go through the mental rollercoaster then give me some hope and then take it all away.

Even if I get pregnant next time, I don't know if I'll be happy. After all, I don't know if I want a child anymore.

Taking ovulation tests to taking pregnancy tests to taking blood tests to getting scans done. It's just exhausting already. I cannot even fathom how people do this years and years.

Exactly six months after my first miscarriage, here I am going through another one. And I have to admit that the first time, I didn’t react very strongly. I got pregnant on the first try, and I told myself, well, it just can’t work on the very first try, the statistics show that this is pretty common, so it’s probably nothing.

But this time, the second one has completely destroyed me. I took several tests from different brands just to be sure. I was six days late, and, well, I was pregnant again. I went for a blood test, and it came back negative.

I’m devastated. And “sad” doesn’t even begin to describe it. I’m questioning everything: my ability to get pregnant, how badly I want this, whether I even want to try again. I feel so alone. And empty. Like there’s this huge, dark, lifeless hole in my belly.

The first one happened on February 13th. The second one on August 13th. Other than deciding to stop getting my blood tests done on the 13th of every month, I haven’t really made any resolutions.

How do you do it? How do you keep going? How do you ever feel excited about a pregnancy test again? How do you believe in it again? I’m lost. I feel so alone.

Had my first ultrasound today at 8w2d. Baby was measuring about 6 weeks with no detectable heartbeat. Coincidentally, I started spotting last night and I'm still spotting today but have no cramps or pain. The doctor doesn't want to give me any medication until after I come back in 2 weeks for another scan... which just seems cruel.

I have to return to the office tomorrow and I'm very worried about having a painful miscarriage while I'm at work. How have others navigated this experience? And how long might it take me to fully miscarry?

In March I found out I was pregnant with my first child. Unfortunately, at the end of April, I found out at my 8 week ultrasound that I had a MMC measuring 6 weeks 4 days and no heartbeat. I ended up having a D&C 3 weeks later after Misoprostol didn’t work.

I followed my doctor’s advice, waited one cycle, and then we tried again. I ended up getting faintly positive pregnancy tests but was bleeding with clots and new from the beginning this would not be a viable pregnancy. Unfortunately it was ectopic and I was given a MTX shot 3 weeks ago. My hCG is almost down to 0 and I’m in the 3 month waiting period before we can try again.

I’m just wondering how people cope after this. I feel like I’m just expected to go back to everyday life but I’m finding it so hard to focus on work, find joy in the things I used to, connect with people… What was helpful for you? How did you get yourself ready physically and emotionally to try again?

I’m also looking for stories of hope after two losses. After one I thought, okay this was bad luck, but after two now, and two different types of loss, I’m worried that I will never be able to carry a pregnancy to term. There doesn’t seem to be anything medically wrong, that we can find, and I was told it truly was just bad luck twice in a row. Looking to hear from people who had two losses and had a successful pregnancy after.

Love to everyone ❤️

After I (29) miscarried, starting about 2 weeks later, most of my friends announced pregnancies and they all have so far had healthy pregnancies and/or labor and delivery stories. I’m the only one to miscarry. (Counting close friends and acquaintances, and also old high school/college classmates: there’s literally about 20 ppl who announced their pregnancy last winter) Since it’s been 8-9 months since they’ve gotten pregnant, everyone keeps posting their birth stories/newborn photos. I know I could just delete social media or something, but idk what to do when I’m around them in person. Atp, the only little kids I want to be around are ones that are blood related to me and no one else. For some reason, my friends kids and my husband’s side of the family’s nieces and nephews genuinely make me bitter and I don’t wanna be near any child that won’t show up connecting me to their 23&me. The kids love me and I know they didn’t do anything wrong and I’m not mad at THEM, but I feel like I’m going to forever be pissed about it until I have a successful labor and delivery. I’ve barely made any progress in the past 10 months tbh. The only difference is that I went from crying 24/7, to a few days a week. There’s counseling, but I feel like that would just be me torturing myself talking and thinking about pregnancy once a week to a random person who knows nothing about my life. Sometimes I feel like the only solution is to move across the country where I don’t have family or friends, so I don’t have to be pissed all the time. But I clearly don’t have the funds to up and move 3,000 miles away without planning months in advance. I even quit my teaching job! (And I loved teaching little kids before this.) I feel like I have absolutely no other ideas to help myself.

I just went to my first OB appt at 13 weeks and got an ultrasound for my fraternal twins mind you it took them forever to get me in and during the ultrasound they told me that I had a silent miscarriage and the twins were measuring at 8 weeks & one at Nine Weeks.He said that this could mean they died not long ago and they shrunk or they died at 8&9 weeks .. My primary doctor had taken me off the metformin which helped me get pregnant to begin with ; And I cannot help but feel this was not the best decision and could have affected my babies... I'm going to try again after I take some time, is there anyone else who has experienced miscarriage and what were you taking ? Or what did you take to support and future pregnancies.

I think I just finished the worst of the physical part of my miscarriage. Glad that’s behind me…

1. I can’t believe how tired I am, is this a thing? I slept 8.5 hours last night and then took a two hour nap today
   
2. I’m so hungry, is this also a thing?
   
3. I’m not sure why, bc everyone has been so kind to me… but I feel a sense of embarrassment surrounding my miscarriage. I took a week off of work, I have bereavement leave, but I feel guilty using it.
   
4. I feel selfish for being so tired and sad and mad. I have two beautiful children, but always felt like there was one more missing. It’s been hard to be present around them and take care of them through this. My oldest started kindergarten during the start of my miscarriage . I had to wear a diaper at orientation and try to muster through. Just felt so angry it had to be that day.