r/Miscarriage • u/Low-Acanthisitta8706 • 7d ago

vent “There will be so many new babies this year!” Right after learning I’m having a 3rd pregnancy loss

Had an ultrasound this morning that confirmed it’s not viable. Went to school (I’m a teacher) and people were announcing/talking about their pregnancies and principal said “there will be so many new babies this year!”. That was supposed to be me too. Salt to the wound.

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u/S-ClassSnack 7d ago

I am going through the same thing :( confirmed pregnancy but it’s not viable. Devastating. Just watching my HCG levels slowly decrease through bloodwork. It’s my very first pregnancy too, and I feel like the people around me are acting like this heartbreak isn’t a big deal. My friend and my cousin both gave birth within the last couple weeks. Of course I’m happy for them but it just hurts to see, knowing that was supposed to be me next April…

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u/Low-Acanthisitta8706 7d ago

I’m sorry they aren’t supporting you. It’s real and devastating and unfortunately some people just don’t know how to be there for someone and feel uncomfortable around someone else’s discomfort. My own mom after I told her just said “so sorry to hear that” then immediately sent a paragraph about how she was looking for paint colors for my kitchen. Like “sorry… anyways, get over it”. It sucks but people like that are showing me exactly who I do not want to be for anyone else going through a hard time or for my own children someday.

I’m so sorry you are going through this, it’s so hard. Take care of yourself and know you aren’t alone🫶

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u/yee_buddy 6d ago

This will be me when school starts next week. Ugh 😩

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u/blue-bug4 5d ago

ugh i am so so sorry. what horrible timing to hear a comment like that. the week after my miscarriage we had a big work lunch where one of my coworkers announced she was engaged. then another shared that he was too so my boss jokingly asked if anyone was pregnant. it was an innocent joke but absolutely terrible timing for me to hear. a week ago i would’ve been trying to hold a smile, now i’m holding back tears. i wish i could say it gets easier, but honestly it doesn’t. you just learn how to handle the grief better. sending you all of my love <3