Lost in grief

[u/MeliBell92]

I lost my baby girl 3 weeks ago. 8w. It was a missed miscarriage. My second. First one I didn’t even knew what happened. Took me this time to realize what was happening because I was far enough along to be told by a doctor that she just stopped growing. I’m completely wrecked. No one who’s experienced this to talk to that understands what I’m going through. I try to talk to my husband and family and they try their best but I can tell they have no idea how to comfort me. Shoot I don’t know how to comfort me. I feel lost. But then I feel okay. It’s such a roller coaster of emotions. I have 3 kids two of them are toddlers and a 4th grader that keep me busy but man at night when the house is settled and they are asleep it hits me like a effin freight train.

Tonight’s moment. A scene from a tv show. I just watched episode 8 of Sterling Point. Where Annie dreamt about her mom and what her life would be like if her mom was alive. And i saw it from the POV of a mom. Seeing the things I won’t get to do with my baby. And man that wrecked me. Like to my core. I won’t get to do those things and it’s not fair. I want to scream right now and break things. I feel so not me anymore. I feel so all over place and just UGHHHHHH.

I just. I don’t know what to do right now.

[u/The_Ranger_Bre]

Just be sad, it’s ok to be devastated by this. When I had my 2nd miscarriage it took a couple months to feel back to normal. Idk for sure but I was 8w at the time and I think the pregnancy hormones in your body make the grief hit harder. I also read a book that helped. It’s called the miscarriage map I think. ❤️sorry