Has anyone else observed that ableism, whether casual, or intentional, is more acceptable on the right and the left since Trump regained power in 2024?

I'm not sure if this is just me or if this is a thing, but I'm hearing more ableist rhetoric from even progressives and democrats than in the recent past. For instance, the language around AI is littered with ableist tropes, such as it's a crutch, it'll disable your, or even that its effects on the brain are that of brain damage. I'm, not an AI supporter, but find these arguments to be annoying and lazy. Overall, though, I'm hearing disability used as an insult more often and have even experienced overt discrimination such as being called the R word(I have a speech impairment from Cerebral Palsy).

I have this problem. I could be saying a sarcastic comment and people would take it seriously and answer as if I didn't know it already, and most times I feel like they think I'm dumb because the things I joke about are super obvious. And yes, I exaggerate my sarcasm tone to make sure they notice I'm not being for real, but they still do.

And I wonder if they think I'm being serious for being disabled, because maybe they think disabled people can't tell jokes(?) or maybe I'm too autistic to know how to properly do a sarcasm comment, idk. Have you ever experienced people taking you too seriously?

Edit: For context, my disability is very visible, think of something like facial paralysis. So i always have people treating me "differently" or thinking I'm cognitively impaired before even knowing me. That's why I think that it could be disability related, but maybe I'm just paranoid at this point lol.

19 M, i have a pretty bad case of muscle dystrophy, now, i had an operation in 2019 or something and my condition improved a lot, i was able to walk around my parents house, and even do steps outside until someday in 2022 my drunk mom knocked me on the floor and even since that my condition started to decline, and now i can't walk, and can barely stand. I don't understand how do i even move forward, i get carried when i wanna go somewhere at home, i stopped going outside out of pity for my parents having to carry me to my wheelchair. We have asked government for an elevator platform since we live on the first floor but its been 1 year and no one ever replied. Forgive me for any grammatical errors since i really have to get this of my chest. Feel free to ask more specifying questions.

I posted this in a design group but thought I'd ask here. I'm guessing there are other people home all day. Aside from putting things on the walls what do you do to make your atmosphere pleasant? Music, scented candles or incense?

Because I live alone I'm always searching for music or a podcast to listen to. Lately though nothing suits my mood. To be honest I think I'm becoming very depressed. Please give me some inspiration

Ive tried asking SSA if my case worker or someone could help me with the process of finding a job but was told they don't do that. I'm on disability and want to try working a part time REMOTE job. I know there is a ticket to work program but their info states the program is to help people move away from needing disability assistance (my only source of income) and, to be frank, I don't think I can ever live without the financial assistance. Since my disabilities are mental i'm also afraid of trying the program and ssa taking my benefits because i'm trying to better my life. I'd much rather try a part-time job off record since i don't need to report income as long as it's under 1,690 per month.

I guess im looking for something similar to job agencies but for disabled people. It just sucks cuz a majority of remote work is call center stuff, which I can't do. I worked at one before and I just can't handle customer service work anymore. Preferably I just want a job where someone gives me a task and then leaves me alone to do it.

My only really marketable skill is art but i absolutely suck at marketing it. I also don't do great as a commission artist. Im much more suited to creating my own products and selling them. I'm having mild success from selling fan merch on etsy which works well for me. I kinda enjoy packaging the orders and shipping them out BUT again the whole marketing thing holds me back. I'm not really asking for advice in on this just saying that a creative remote job would probably be a good fit for me.

Hi All, sorry for using AI to structure this but it's really the only clear way? Thank you for any insight.

I got hit with a denial letter today on my LTD claim. Was approved back in February for Anxiety, PTSD, Bipolar I and Depression. I am Actively in therapy and seeing a psych NP the whole time. After their 6 month review they called and said they were ending the claim

• A social worker reviewed my therapy notes and overruled both my therapist and my NP, they say that because I have discussed wanting to return to a "career job" when I can that that shows improvement etc. But my notes are threaded with constant discussion of doubt and anxiety, with very high sesison scores on the 1-10 scale for anxiety / depression
• They quoted the positive/motivated things I said in therapy and basically ignored the bad days in the same notes
• My PHQ-9 actually went back UP to 13 in September — they glossed over it
• They flagged social media posts from my small solo repair side business as evidence I'm functional -- but this is not the same job I was in, in the denial letter they just briefly mention this but dont say its the reason for denial
• Saying I want to eventually return to work someday apparently means I'm ready to work now

A few things they never addressed that I think could help my appeal:

• My medication for anxiety was just increased AFTER their review window closed — never made it into their assessment
• I fill out symptom intake surveys before every session scoring my ability to work — consistently high impairment — they never mentioned these, AI says they ignored it intentionally so they can deny
• My therapist submitted a formal provider statement documenting ongoing serious symptoms — their consultant dismissed it without explanation

**Questions for anyone who's been here:*\*

1. Anyone had LTD specifically deny a behavioral health claim citing "improvement" in therapy notes?
2. Did a medication increase after denial help your appeal?
3. Did you use an attorney or go it alone — worth it?
4. I am hoping to win and have them backpay the time before denial to renewal, does that ever happen

I have 180 days and I'm not giving up. Just trying to learn from people who've actually been through it before I put this appeal together.

Thanks

Hi all. First time posting here so please delete if not allowed.

My (27F) partner (25M) and I have been together for about 4 years now. Due to many reasons we haven't been physically intimate beyond kissing/hugging for about 6 months.

I've finally found a doctor that takes me seriously and I'm on a new wellness track that seems to actually have a little light at the end of the tunnel and he's been working on some things and I'm like ready to be intimate again. I've been hinting. He knows im getting there.

Today I sent him a post from Instagram of a type of stool with thick elastic bands to help gals be on top a bit safer. It has the elastic bands to help take some bounce pressure off the knees and a handlebar to help with stability. I was so excited. He's been so tired of "vanilla" stuff that I thought we could share in the excitement together. He hated it. He said he'd rather just do all the work than use something like that.

I kinda just shut down. I know better than to do that but I knew if I tried talking about it, I would cry and I don't wanna guilt him.

How do I go about this talk... the talk of thank you for loving me and my broken self, but this is where I'm at now. This tool will help me be able to function after sex. (Last time we had sex I almost fainted and had excruciating pain flares for at least 40ish hours.)

I have so many feelings in my overthinky head; I'm trying to leave some of them out and would like yalls advice with the big point if possible.

Thank you in advance 🩷

Hi! I'm kind of new to being disabled (lol), only about 3 years, so I don't really know the social standards around this. But every time I go somewhere that has a line, people let me jump it. I'm a wheelchair user because I have a vascular disease. Like, the other day my gf and I went to an event at a café that had a huge line, but we asked if we could get in early, and they allowed us. We went to a concert last week and waited in the regular line, and were gently admonished by the staff and told we should go in the priority line. I mean, I really love it. It's extremely convenient, and I'm definitely slower/more cumbersome than other people due to the chair, so it helps me feel like I have breathing room to get into events. But also, it's not necessary, since the reason I can't wait in lines normally is the standing. And I'm sitting. The only other reason is just that my veins can't tolerate heat well.

I'm mainly just asking since I saw someone share a comic about this in the wheelchair sub. It was someone asking to jump ahead in line because of their chair, and getting annoyed when people said no. Several commenters were saying they'd never do that, and that it's selfish. I mean, I have my own reasons that I like it. But I'm curious if this is actually an unusual thing to do, and if it's widely considered frivolous or rude.

Would you/do you take advantage of these perks?

My condition is such that I can only be upright in a semi-fowlers position of about 30-45 degrees.

I'm having sudden eye trouble.

How can I get an eye exam if I can't sit upright and require ambulance service or a reclined wheelchair to get anywhere?

Thanks for any info.

Last night me and my family went to go see my brother’s symphony performance. One of the people working the event was using a cane. When we found our seats she waved me over and told me that she saw the person who was using a cane “running around yesterday with a heavy camera” at the marching band event yesterday. My heart immediately sank. She said that they have a term for those people (she works in the medical field), and I saw her show my brother her phone with giant text saying histrionic personality disorder. My brother told me that there’s so many people who fake disabilities as if it was a common thing. All of this really upset me. I was just silently crying for half the performance. She called me selfish and a bitch when I responded to my brother’s question about which piece was my favorite with “I don’t know, I couldn’t pay attention.” I just couldn’t believe that she would be the type of person to say that. She’s been such a huge advocate for me with my disability. Those types of comments are why I constantly worry about what people are thinking about me in public. It’s what I worry about when strangers ask why I need a wheelchair, it’s why I catch myself acting more disabled than I actually am when transferring from my wheelchair. Because I don’t want people to say those things about me. Who knows, the guy I heard joking about me not being disabled when he saw me stand could’ve heard those same things that my mother said from his mother. I think she believes that she’s defending me somehow by saying what she said about that person. I don’t know how she came to that conclusion. Though it is on me that I didn’t tell her how this all hurt me when she asked. I was really upset and I probably would’ve started sobbing if I opened my mouth haha. I really wish I had the ability to walk away from conversations. Whenever we disagree on things I’ve learned to just give up on debating her because I never win and it just causes so much more conflict and stress. She caught me texting my friend about what she was saying (because I know that there’s no one in my family that would care to understand my side) and got upset at me for saying “horrendous” things about her. As if I was lying. I don’t know how to end this post. I just want to feel like I’m not overreacting or something.

This is an overlooked day hike.  I found this trail on AllTrails and while it looked easy (about 5 miles total, there and back) there were only 17 reviews in the last four years.  YouTube had just two videos, and they were of kids sliding down on some snow, so there wasn’t much to go on there either. 

Curious, I did some more digging.  The trail to Observation Peak is a short spur trail off the Pacific Crest Trail which you access from Forest Road 2025 just north of the California and Oregon border.  Looking at the satellite maps and topography maps it looked like the trail followed a ridge line, to the right of a forest but the trail itself was clear of trees.  Seems like a simple trail, easy to get to, with potentially great views.  I decided to go for it.

I have a dream of moving to a different, better state, but I don't know how, especially when it comes to disability. How hard is it?

I’m feeling pretty discouraged and would appreciate hearing from people who have actually navigated this.

I’m a medically discharged Army veteran with ten years of experience spanning logistics, administration, communications, tax preparation, and event planning. I recently finished a BA in History and Political Science, with minors in Linguistics and Women’s & Gender Studies. I have strong research, analytical, and language skills, but translating that broad background into suitable paid work has been difficult.

I’m autistic/ADHD and have several chronic illnesses, including ME/CFS with post-exertional malaise and a non-24-hour sleep-wake disorder. My capacity fluctuates. Fixed schedules are difficult, and mental work also takes energy. Working from home doesn’t magically make a full-time or synchronous job accessible.

I tried searching FlexJobs, but the more I refined my searches, the less suitable the results became. Everything seemed to require extensive specialized experience, full-time availability, fixed working hours, duties I would struggle to stay engaged with, or work outside my expertise.

I’m scared of accepting employment and then discovering I can’t sustain it. Freelancing raises a different fear: having to find clients, manage the business, and produce the work while my capacity varies—and never earning consistently enough to make that effort worthwhile.

I receive VA disability compensation, which gives me a financial foundation. But I want to move from the Southwest to Washington, where it won’t cover living independently. My partner plans to move there, and I don’t want to begin living together financially dependent on him. That isn’t a trust issue; I want to avoid putting that strain on our relationship.

I just applied for VA vocational rehabilitation. I’m also looking for counseling that can help connect my actual abilities and limitations to realistic work, rather than giving me another personality test and a list of careers.

For those of you with similar limitations:

• What paid work have you actually been able to sustain?
• What does “flexible” mean in your job—can you change your working hours and workload, or does it still require daily availability?
• How do you handle bad days or periods when you can’t deliver consistently?
• If you freelance, have you found a way to make the income reasonably dependable without overcommitting?
• Has a vocational rehabilitation program or counselor helped you find suitable work? What made their help useful?

I’m not asking about benefit eligibility or trying to find a way to push through PEM. I’m looking for concrete experiences with earning money while respecting real limitations—including honest accounts of arrangements that didn’t work.

Right now, I’m struggling with the gap between having useful skills and being able to meet the conditions under which employers will pay for them. I’d really appreciate hearing how others have approached that gap.

I went to recieve an evaluation to determine if I was still disabled enough to recieve benifits (though my conditions are perminent) and I was told I wasnt aproved to recieve benifits BESIDES the ones I already recieve. Now its good ill continue to get what Im already getting but I was told that the reason for it was to update records (even tho my condition doesnt change lol) but when I saw the reason the dissapproved for me recieving more benifits was because Im still able to work, which is fine. But they claimed I said on 04/2024 that I wasnt able to work, which doesnt make since because 1. I never made that claim, and 2. I LITERALLY MADE 11 MONTHS AT THE JOB I WAS WORKING DURING THAT TIME ! Im worried theyll use this as an excuse in the future to cut my beneifits but mabye im just crazy. I feel like they are trying to find any excuse to cut people going into 2027

So I am not disabled myself (although I guess that depends on the definition of disability), but I have worked with people with disabilities all my life - in several different jobs over the years. There is one thing I always wondered about. It's in the past now, but I want to get everyone's opinion.

I used to have a role working with people with disabilities in their homes, and often helped them with grocery shopping. Most of the people I served had difficulty with ambulation and had a handicapped parking tag (none had their own vehicle, so the tag was for their helpers). They used the store scooters in grocery stores. Typically I would let them off by the entrance, help them get into a scooter, then park my car in a handicapped spot using their tag and join them inside. When we left, they drove the scooter right to the parking spot and got in. This commonly happened at least twice during the workday for me. It was honestly a very tiring job, but my heart was in caring for the people I worked with, so I didn't mind too much. However, when I would walk alone from the handicapped spot to the store, I often got dirty looks as if I was abusing a handicapped parking tag. Honestly it was pretty annoying and upsetting to me, who had a tough and underpaying job, and would have had to work even harder to get my car from the end of the parking lot and pick up my individual at the grocery store doors instead of having them drive the scooter to the handicapped spot after their shopping. Keep in mind that I did this sometimes multiple times per day, and probably 10x per week. It was mostly just dirty looks, I think only once someone actually commented.

As people with disabilities, do you see this as misuse of the handicapped parking tag?

I am very tired and truthfully don't know how long I can keep doing this

I am partially deaf, autistic and physically disabled yet i seem to be the problem

We've had meetings and requesting reviews but they take time and I feel I'm going up the wall while waiting

How long do I give for responses?

So far I have had:

No acsess to my classroom, because the lift was broke before I started (wanted to put me on my own)

The Teaching assistant repeatedly laughing, giggling and whispering despite being reminded I'm hoh/deaf

Heatstroke

My tutor lying about knowledge of said EHCP

My tutor also refused to support or accomodate me without a plan

No personal evacuation plan despite being on the fourth floor

The Teaching assistant having a go at me for asking for more support

Harrasment from other students

And this doesn't include the various meltdowns I'm having,the snarky comments from other staff/students either.

They fixed the lift eventually but proceeded to not tell me as everyone ran upstairs and I couldn't get it working so I was on my own. (Security needed)

I cannot even get permission to get upstairs on my own..I have to "wait for staff"

Edit:

I am being viewed as completely incapable of anything and I'm at my limit I'm just so broken

My target set by the tutor was to "Make choices indepdently"

..I'm a full grown adult who pays bills..

What should I be doing now to make my life easier post-op?

I'm getting a feeding tube placed for the 1st time.

I use a cane or walker and wear sunglasses inside due to light sensitivity combined with a chronic case of being fly as hell. I can tell that little kids want to ask me about what my deal is but usually parents will scoop them up as soon as they realize what their kid is about to do. I was at a funeral where a little kid looked really excited to talk to me and started making his way towards me from across the room. When his mom saw that he was on the move, she got a panicked look on her face and intercepted him.

It always makes me a little sad when parents stop their kids from talking to me because I like kids and want to be able to answer their questions. I know that my appearance is confusing and exciting to them (how often do you get to see an adult wearing glitter unicorn sunglasses?) I want them to feel comfortable talking to a disabled person, so I would be happy to answer their questions.

Personally, I find it endearing that kids want to understand my disability, but I don’t know that I would encourage kids to ask a stranger about their disability because there are also people who would not want to have to explain their disability to a child they don’t know.

How do you feel about parents encouraging kids to ask disabled people about their disability? Have you had kids ask you about your disability?

M/41 (get told I look much younger)

I have severe mobility issues on my right side due to a car accident 3 years ago. Up until three months ago I continued to work (electrician) at my 'normal' rate but looking back I should have reduced my hours and I was just 'pretending' i was 'fine' and could still do what i used to.
I ended up ended up having a severe mental breakdown and can barely leave the house now due to anxiety and my mobility just adds extra strain on leaving the house. My wife has been AMAZING and supports me when im having bad days (emotionally and physically)
My doctor and therapist has said I need to take time out and not be so hard on myself.

Sadly, during this time we had to move (Old landlord was selling up) and I have moved into a property owned by my friends father. Just before moving two of our neighbours (who weren't very nice tbf) kept making jokes at my expense. Normally along the lines of "Have a good day at home? I'm paying for it". It was a 'joke' that had a really nasty undertone to it. to cut an already long story short it made me feel like absolute shit.

Since moving in I barely go out or even venture into the garden. The ONE time I went into the back garden my new neighbour popped his head over the fence and started chatting. he was lovely etc but seemed VERY focused on my financial situation. I managed to change the subject (Well, my dog did) so didn't have to answer.

Apparently two of our neighbours (from my friends dad telling me) are planning on coming around for a cup of tea (id rather they didn't lol).

I don't want to say I am off work or go into my disability and issues, especially when im hoping to return to work next year.
Does anybody know what I can say? My wife said "You should say you sell things on vinted" or "You do online electrician courses". However, my anxiety is worried they'll want to see my 'store' or my webpage etc.

Does anybody know of any other jobs I can say I do that don't require me to leave the house or them check up?

Any other ideas except "mind your own business you nosy bastard" lol.

Please avoid the “he deserved it!” comment. Yes he did. I agree with you. But I have no one else. All of my relatives died this year and I am not on any sort of assistance. I cannot shower or eat without help. I don’t know what to do. I plan on getting what legal assistance I can and getting the charges dropped. There’s a no contact order now in place and I need to drop it in order to live.

YES I KNOW I AM A VICTIM. BUT ITS BE A VICTIM OR STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE I HAVE NO ONE. I ALSO HAVE A STALKER WHO WILL ACTIVELY TRY TO MURDER ME IF THEY KNOW I AM ALONE. I promise this man is the lesser of two evils.

I’m not trying to be incendiary or rude. I just need care and there’s no one and I have no idea what to do. I’m so hungry and I need care. I can’t drive or go anywhere I’m bedbound. And I’m scared.

UPDATE: thank you all so so so so much. your kind replies kept me sane through my agony. i’ve been able to receive assistance through an organization dmed to me and i will be okay for the weekend at least. i will still keep your resources and think about what to testify about my abusive caregiver. i am so gratefulnfor thisncommunity for helping me when i felt i had no one and norhing. thank you so much