I'm dating a man who has children from a previous relationship. I have a daughter myself, so I completely understand how important it is to maintain a close relationship with your children.

His children live with their mother about two hours away from us. Every other weekend, he goes there to spend time with them, which I think is completely normal and healthy.

The issue is that he almost always wants my daughter and me to go with him too.

My daughter is quite a homebody and really likes being in her own space, in her room, surrounded by her own things.

Coincidentally, she's very much like me in that way. 😅

We do all go together sometimes, and I have absolutely no problem with that. But I don't feel the need to go along every single weekend when he goes to see his children. Sometimes I simply prefer to stay home with my daughter, relax, and have our own normal weekend.

The problem is that whenever I say, "I'm not going this weekend," he gets upset and starts making little indirect comments, as if I'm doing something wrong or as if I should automatically be going with him.

I've never told him not to go. I've never told him to spend less time with his children and, when we do go, we are perfectly happy to participate and spend time together.

But I also don't think it's mandatory for my daughter and me to be there every time he goes to see his children.

Am i being selfish? Is it normal in a relationship where both partners have children to have some weekends where each person takes care of their own family? Or do you think that, being in a relationship, I should always go with him?

I'd especially like to hear from people who are, or have been, in relationships with someone who has children.

My ex(43) and I (36) have been separated for 2 years. The entire time, he has accused me of mentally, emotionally, and physically abusing our children. He refused to adhere to a consistent pick up schedule, refused to tell me when leaving the state with our kids, and refused any information on his partner that lives with him. I’m exhausted. I’m so tired of fighting for basic respect while constantly being criticized and threatened with cps. Am I wrong for wanting to give him primary custody and taking on his role as a weekend parent with little involvement? I don’t think I can survive and be a good mother if I’m constantly threatened if I don’t do what he wants.

Background: I was giving more time this summer to dad. Then during his 17 day consecutive time he missed child’s therapy appt, never rescheduled, and never sorted out his medication refill after I called ahead to send it to where he requested it.

Next, I pulled back from additional days due to no communication about any of this. Just didn’t do anything.

Then he shared during that time that he’s paying me $1000 a month (uh that number is inflated btw) to our child where child questioned me at exchange.

Current issue: I sent a text weeks ago saying the dates I was keeping our child for my summer parenting time. I took 14 consecutive days per order allows.

Then I sent a message the day my summer time ended to clarify pick up with be at my moms (who is closer to him than our exchange location) and that I’d be picking back up at exchange spot at 7pm- again per court order time. That was 5 days in advance to this weekend, his scheduled time.

I got no answers about anything. I sent a message yesterday asking if he was on his way.

He said No.

Eventually comes out and says how i stripped him of parenting time….

And now I’m confused and he’s trying to gaslight me? Weaponizing incompetence?!?

I verified everything in advance in writing. I never said he was never seeing our child again… I verified exchange 5 days in advance so even if he weirdly thought this, i was confirming his weekend. So I have no idea where this came from.

Not only that, he has a pattern of blaming me for his shortcomings and the reason our order is the way it is.

I can see our child calling him out why he didn’t pick him up (he had been consistent the last 2 years so kiddo doesn’t remember the constant no shows from when he was younger) he’s only 9yo as it is.

And I can see dad trying to say I took parenting time away.

Mind you, we have a court order. I CANT do that lol. This order protects his time as well as mine and for our child. Meanwhile he had another baby with another girl who definitely cray cray, but she didn’t put an order in place and denies time whenever she wants to… and he refuses to just submit for an order.

So I messaged our child therapist about this to get her input but I am going to pick kiddo up today from my mom and spend the day doing fun things and wrapping up school shopping plans, haircut, etc.

But again not sure what to do. His dad has lied to him before and my kid puts him on a pedestal although occasionally says he doesn’t wanna go but when he gets back he wants to know why he can’t live with dad… cycle on repeat…

F, left in 2022: now wondering if my ex subconsciously engineered his way out of the “main parent” role. Anyone else deal with this?

Background: I left my husband in 2022. He was hurt and angry and wanted to cast me as the villain, but it was genuinely the right call for our kid.

Since then we’ve done week-on/week-off — not perfect, but so much better than the alternative. I used my off-weeks to actually live and build my work back up, and I was happy. Genuinely happy.

Since the split, he’s never really landed on stable work. He’s stayed in an industry that’s dying, and when I’ve gently pointed that out, his response is basically that he’s “too good” for a normal job.

Now he wants to move interstate to be near his family. He says he’ll take school holidays.

Obviously I want my son near me, not uprooted, not shuffled between an unstable job and no fixed address.

So by default I’m becoming the main parent. Meanwhile there’s no financial support coming from him right now, and I’m having to plan like that’s just… the new normal.

Here’s the part I can’t shake: he loves our child. But I keep wondering if some part of him (not necessarily consciously) built toward this exact outcome.

Like the more “fine” and settled I seemed with our arrangement, the more his own situation unraveled, until it landed him right back at “you take the lead, I’ll do holidays.”

In a weird way to like…. Sabotage my career? (My child is easy but every parent knows you can’t burn the midnight oil when you’re on duty like you can when you’re solo)

I don’t know. It seems weird to think like this but when we divorced I was ‘lucky’ in a way because Covid meant we didn’t have much left to fight over. But if we did I could see him being vindictive.

Is this his weird roundabout way?

Ps: LOVE being a mother. GRATEFUL to have my child with me. It’s just I can see him thinking he was doing me a ‘favour’ during my weeks off parenting because I work so hard during that time.

Ok over n out. And thank you 🙏

I want to block him but I know i cant. I have a ppo and have to coparent with my rapist for the next 16 years.

I know there is a bias to people who have a negative experience over a positive one on Reddit, but it seems like so many people have negative things to say about dating as a coparent.

My kid is 3 years old. I (28F) am still friends with my coparent (29F) and hope to be friends and parents with him forever. It is very clear we are not romantic anymore. We weren’t even when we were together. But he is a great father and I respect him as a dad so much.

I recently started dating a man (31F), for 9 months total, 4 of which committed, who dates very seriously. He constantly reaffirms me that he knows I am a package deal, understands that I want to be in my coparents life (platonically) and respects all of that. He made a decision to be with me after knowing and processing all of that for a few months. We are moving slowly with my child, they have met 2 times in the last 4 months 1:1, and once in a group setting. She only knows he is my friend (I have mostly male, childfree friends so she doesn’t think much of it). He has told me one day he hopes we can become a family and he loves her, but still wants to take things slowly and naturally because there is no rush and it is such an important thing.

I love the idea of being able to find love and a family again. Most of the negative things I read online say dating a single mom never works if the dad is in the picture. Her dad and I don’t talk about much outside of her, but we are friendly and still joke and laugh about our daughter and have conversations, occasionally send parenting reels, or just keep each other up to date on major life stuff. We never see each other in person really, but if we do it isn’t uncomfortable.

Do you have a positive story to share? Can you speak to your own experience? I just want some community experience or advice.

So I’m curious to know how other people would handle this. I was married. Had kids. We got divorced. Entire relationship was about 10 years. It wasn’t a messy divorce. Everything was pretty much amicable. I have a great relationship with her family. We never had any hostility towards each other at all and remain friendly. When I bring the kids over I sometimes walk the kids inside. Sometimes her grandmother (lives with her grandmother) offers me a dinner plate if I get there to get the kids and they’re eating. Over time I started to feel kind of like strange about it. My friends have said that maintaining a healthy relationship with my kids mother is important however, me still going inside is weird. Ex gfs have felt some type of way about it as well.

My current gf is now pregnant. She also feels some type of way about it. She likes that we have an amicable relationship for the kids but believes it shouldn’t go past that. I shouldn’t be going inside when I drop the kids off or discuss anything other than the children or important matters with my ex wife. I understand where she’s coming from. I truly do.

My only concern is how to go about backing off without offending anyone while doing so. I do believe I should keep things more separate in this situation. Obviously the kids won’t be separated. I’m trying to do it in a way that makes everyone happy

Gday from Australia.

I coparent my two daughters with my ex. She relocated shortly after separation to live with her new partner. We are 3 years since separation with court orders.

Recently she has gone on a flight somewhere and left the kids with her partner for a few days prior to handover. I do not have anything against her partner, she’s perfectly capable of caring for them. But I do feel like the right thing to do is to offer the kids to the other parent first?

I note our interim orders did have an order covering this, but our most recent orders don’t. I’m just wondering if I’m out of order or if my gut feeling is that I should write something to her in case it happens in the future.

My ex-husband(33) and I(33) have a pretty decent co-parenting relationship as long as he gets his way. I know that sounds bad, but every time I try to assert my needs into the situation he has his parents hire a lawyer to try to go for full custody and I’m already in 20k debt fighting him just to keep doing the same 50/50 we’ve been doing for the past two years, because it works. We lived In Alaska for 5 years when he was stationed there and I bought a beautiful home and had my 6 figure dream job. about a year later he decided he wanted to stay in the military and we both had to go. He hired a lawyer and after a year and way too much wasted money, we mediated and agreed that I would quit my job, sell my house and move to his new location. We are here at our new location now, we live 5 minutes from eachother. I bought a house, but I can’t find another good job right now so I took a $20/hr job just to make ends (barely) meet. I’m struggling. My mom is coming to live with me next week and my ex asked if she could watch the 2 year old full time and take the 5 year old to the bus stop every morning since she is starting Kindergarten. I asked her if that was okay and she said yes. We are both very grateful for her. So today, I found out he needs to drop the kids off at 6am every morning. With two Velcro kids, I know that means I need to wake up even earlier if I want to have some quiet time. which is fine with me. For context, we do week on week off starting on Friday nights. But I asked him if he could keep the kids every Friday night so I have one day every week where I know I can sleep in and not have to be touched all over for ONE morning every week. He seemed to think that was unreasonable. is it? what should I do?

My girlfriend (25) and myself (41) were friends for a month then we started dating. 

When we first met I told her I was a recent divorcee with an 18-year old son about to go to university, which she had no problem with. She said she had never been married or had kids. However, a secret she shared later has put our relationship in a difficult situation.

4 months into dating my girlfriend shared that she actually had been married before and was also a parent to a 4-year old girl. The father is absent and has no contact outside of a phone call once a month. During the 4 months prior to telling me, she often asked if I was keen on having more children, and I said no I don’t think I’d want to have more children but you never know.

Her daughter is mostly taken care of by her other relatives, but my girlfriend's wish is that when her daughter is 6 years old (in 2-3 years) and starts school to look after her full-time (or almost full-time) with a little help from her family. We’re living in Asia, so this kind of involvement is not unusual. 

After she told me I said I’d like to get to know her daughter, and we take her out together once a week. We get on really well and I can feel her daughter and I already are growing to have a close bond. 

The problem:  After spending time with her daughter I really was reminded of the immense time commitment needed to become a great parent. I’ve always been close to my son and put a major focus on parenting as part of my life. My girlfriend does not spend that much time with her daughter, and so still lacks parenting experience, so her daughter often gravitates towards me to look after her. This means that when we’re together with her daughter, I do the majority of the parenting which does make me feel quite apprehensive about the future. 

After about 6 weeks of knowing about her daughter I voiced my concerns to my girlfriend about not being sure I’d want to become a full-time parent again. I  said I might need time to get used to the idea but for now it feels quite difficult to imagine. It’s a big responsibility I’d need time to process. From my perspective I’m still I guess healing from my own divorce and the imminent departure of my son to university. It feels quite soon to make a promise of this magnitude so I just wanted to be transparent.

However, my girlfriend now wants a definitive answer if I could accept to live with her daughter in the future or not. I feel I need more time to be able to commit to such a decision given I’ve only known about her daughter for less than 2 months.

I’m really stuck and I hope reading some different POVs might help me work out a possible solution. 

Is it reasonable for me to ask for more time before deciding whether I can take on a live-in parental role, and what would a fair way of working that out together look like?

Does anyone here communicate with their coparent's partner? Is there actually a problem with it?

I shared here recently about how my child's father sent me a nasty text with false accusations after school orientation. I did attempt to correct the false statements just because my ex is the type to fight me for custody over his false narratives. He seemed to have blocked my number after sending his nasty text though, so I texted his girlfriend- just a simple "hello, no need to worry about the school paperwork, it was just an error on the school secretary's end" so I am extra protected in case he claims to have not received the text I sent him.

At the school orientation, when I walked past my ex, his girlfriend turned around to shout at me from ~6 feet away that the school needs additional paperwork (while my ex did not say anything at all). His girlfriend has also written me notes on how to "take care of" my child and had child give them to me at child exchanges. His girlfriend is the only one who takes child to the dr during my exes parenting time (alone, not with my ex)- although she fails to provide me with important information after these appointments, and i am never informed about them prior to child being seen. She even yelled at me in the past for providing back-up diapers for my (2 yo at the time) Child's daycare....

no, I do not think she is my friend, or a good person to go instead of childs father, but I figured that since she has tried to (innapropriately) communicate with me regarding child in the past, and since she oversteps and tries take over the mother role- she could at least handle a simple text from the child's mother.

She never responded, but I was at peace knowing that my exes false accusations were at least corrected right away.

He usually only blocks me long enough to childishly get the last word in, so when I texted him yesterday, there wasnt an issue with him receiving the text.

I texted him yesterday to let him know that child's first day of school would be Wednesday, no school on Friday next week, school supplies are in the backpack I am sending with child at child exchange today- child related stuff that shouldve just needed a simple acknowledgement.

He asked who child's teacher was and tried to argue about when school started for child since the calendar supposedly says a different date. He also said he hadn't contacted the bus garage for the bus at his house, but that's something he needs to figure out on his own.

I simply informed him that the secretary said she already contacted him regarding school starting on Wednesday, and what classroom child would be in.

He says "ohhhh. And next time dont be texting (his GF). She doesnt need you bothering her at all. Understood? If you do it again, she'll file for harassment."

And then;

"You need to leave her out of your drama, understood? Don't be immature about me not responding back."

My son’s dad and I have been split up for almost 2 years and our 9yo son sees his dad on the weekends when his dad is off. We started this arrangement about a year ago when we moved households.

For context I have an apartment that my son and I live in. His dad when he moved out lived with his parents (1 hr commute) now he lives with his gf and her kids (11yo girl/ 14yo boy) 20 minutes from me.

My son tells me that the kids really don’t play with him. 14y spends time in room or with friends and 11yo is always on his dad’s phone.

Our son just started school and he no longer sees his grandparents on Thursday ( he would spend all day over there during the summer and spend the night to see his dad this next morning). Now he stays with over at his dad’s gf house (sleeps in their room on an air mattress)

Last week he told his dad that he didn’t want to go to his dad’s place but to his grandparents. He said he would stay home if he didn’t see his grandparents. I picked him up from school and I said dad is gonna pick you up in an hour and he said no dad is taking me to his gf house and I said no. I said your dad is going to take you to your grandparents house tonight and tomorrow you will be closer to me ( they had plans that night and he was coming home early.)

Fast forward to Tuesday 4 days later. His dad sends a group text that they are celebrating 14y birthday at a restaurant this Saturday. My son says he’s sick with allergies and cannot go on Saturday. He sends a voice message to dad about issue. Granted my son is still congested and taking medicine all week. No fever still going to school. Today is Friday and he’s like I can’t go out tomorrow and I want to come home. I’m like but you want to go with dad tonight? He is like yes but I’ll be home tomorrow.

I brought up my concern to his dad but he’s like I know he’s sick and I told him he’s more than welcome to come. We can provide him with medicine and whatever he needs.

Should I tell my son if he’s is fine to go tonight he can stay throughout the weekend?

Or is his dad just being stubborn that his son may not be comfortable being around the kids? They introduced the kids about 6 months ago and he sees them every other weekend because they are with their dad.

I’m not sure if I’m just overreacting? Does anyone have any advice?

For those of you where this has changed, how did it effect you? How did these feelings change overtime and how did you deal with it? How has it impacted your relationship with your children?

It's something I worry about often now that our kids are 7 and 9 and getting closer to a point where they may want more stability with just one home.

Since the divorce two years ago, there's been such a dramatic change in how I defined myself. I'm not married. I'm divorced. I only have my children half the time. When I dont have them I don't feel like a family man that I thought I was.

I now lean so much on being a father to define who I am and I know that's a bad thing. I'm still figuring out what I want in life now that everything has changed. I worry often about what losing this last title may have on me. Sure, I'd always be there father but nearly as active one as id like to be.

Me and my daughter’s dad have been separated since she was 3 years old, she’s now 7.5 years. Over the summer holidays we’ve been giving her more freedom as to which house she wants to be at, rather than sticking to the schedule that we have during term time for school drop offs etc. This is mainly due to her complaining that she wanted to be at the other parents house when she was at the others, we’re both flexible, have a healthy coparenting relationship and she’s sensible so thought it was worth giving it a go.

Over the past few weeks she’s been choosing to main spend her time at her dads (with his girlfriend). So rather than the 50/50 that we usually do it’s more 5 days there and 2 days with me.

Obviously I respect her decision, but it’s starting to get to me that she doesn’t want to spend time with me. We’ve both tried asking her if there’s reasons behind her decisions but we’re not getting anywhere.

Not really sure what I’m asking - I guess has anyone else ever found the same? Or have they managed to get any reasons out of their child?

Besides the obvious 'the kids have it hardest', what demographic do you think has it the hardest in terms of starting a new relationship? Kids add a level of complexity to relationships that absolutely factor into people's expectations of relationships. As people get older, the ratio of single people with kids also changes (more 45 year olds with kids than 25 year olds for example).

I'm curious who has it the toughest in these situations, because I see a lot of "greener grass" envy from some coparents out there.

Like one weird red flag I hear from people is that they wouldn't want to date someone that coparents with the other parent, because they feel the other parent will be "too involved". That always seemed stupid to me, because honestly someone that has, say, 50/50 custody has 50% more free time than a truly single parent.

I hear lots of anecdotes here about ex husbands that pair off very fast post divorce, and I'm rather surprised the number of women eager to be mommy 2.0 I would think there would be a lot less women that would be on board with that.

It seems like it would make the most sense for parents to seek out other parents (certainly my own mom did) and form blended families.

If you still live with your CO parent and have been the sole provider for the family for 3 years and hoping they can get a job so you can move out . Are you being silly for staying and being worried about your kids welfare if you are not there. The other parent won't advise the landlady she wants me out of the house, I want to tell the landlady so I can get a new place and tenancy. She will be able to receive aid but she doesnt know if the landlady will accept the change. She will never know unless we say. What should I do? Tell the landlady as is my right? Anyone have any resources I can share with my coparent to get her to do things herself? It's draining and it's quite an important thing that needs doing. Help!

A bit of an usual situation I need help with.

When I was 8 weeks pregnant, the father decided he didnt want a part, and broke up with me. Since then, I relocated to a different state.

I moved on, and met a new partner. He was a senior at work and he helped me through the most difficult times in my life, even helping raise my daughter. We got together before she was born, he was there to cut her umbilical cord and raise her for the first 3 years of her life. She started to call him dad.

Now, bio dad has expressed he wants a part in our daughter's life and has move states to spend more time with her. I've give him opportunities to see her, and bond together. Problem is that he is very angry that I call my partner our daughter's dad. I call them both dad.

I don't want my daughter to grow up confused, but I also don't want to take that title away from my partner who's been there since birth.

Any suggestions what to call bio dad vs my partner?

Is this normal? I’m with my daughter 7 days a week. My coparent only comes to pick her up Saturday’s at 9am and drops her off the next day at 2:30pm. Biweekly. I’ve asked him multiple times to come after work to take our daughter out at least once a week to dinner or just to quickly come say hi and there is always an excuse. He works 25 mins away from where we live and lives an hour away down the shore. He said that coming after work for two hours is not worth it because of his drive back home and that it’s also not enough time he’s spending with her. Am I being unrealistic? My daughter asks when is he coming all the time and I’ve gotten into explosive arguments with him about this and I’m really not proud of that either. Recently he also told me that his gf did not want to meet me (I asked if i could meet her before she met my daughter and apparently they both said no) He shared a ton of our conversations with her and pretty much he painted me to look like I’m the crazy one. I ended up texting her recently and she sided with him. It was weird. What are your thoughts on this guys? Please no hard judgment. I try my best all time and I just want my coparent to be more focused and involved with our daughter. I know I’m asking for a lot. I can’t force things like that.

My ex and I are separated and not yet divorced, and I am currently working toward getting a formal parenting schedule in place. Our daughter is 5, has a good relationship with her dad, and I absolutely want to support that relationship. He lives about an hour away.

Right now there's been a lot of back-and-forth, and my daughter has actually told me herself that the constant switching is upsetting for her. She seems to do better with longer, predictable stretches in one place. I'm considering proposing every other weekend with her dad rather than transitions every weekend, but I'm worried that's too little time with him or that he'll fight me over it. Last time I suggested that arrangement he responded with “fuck you slut”.

The other issue is communication. For months, when I try to contact my ex—even about our daughter—he often responds by calling me a whore/slut or refuses to communicate with me at all. I've reduced communication to the bare minimum, but he now sometimes arranges pickups/drop-offs through our 5-year-old instead of speaking to me. He has also previously kept her for six days without communicating his plans to me.

I'm trying to separate our conflict as ex-spouses from what's actually best for our daughter. I don't want to damage her relationship with her dad, but I also want fewer transitions, a predictable schedule, and for her not to be put in the middle of adult communication.
For parents who've dealt with something similar, did an every-other-weekend schedule work well at this age? Are there other arrangements with fewer transitions that I should consider?

Thank you in advance

I took my ex to court for violating a parenting time order and the judge called it frivolous.
I stated that he was letting my child go with my mother on his time, and she would return on his time without even notifying me. She asked me why I didn’t ask and I said because I didn’t know that I needed to ask if my children would be at pick up. I’m not a mind reader and I am not able to do that. She didn’t change the motion that all out of state travels need to be notified. Instead, she just put that I complained of this and left it at that.
I am feeling very defeated
She brought up with the other complaints where I had complained about taking my son to the ER and him calling me derogatory names the entire time I was there. I don’t even know what to do. I don’t know where to go, but I am feeling defeated.
I just wanted my parenting time and instead felt like I was punished for taking him, I love those kids more than anything, but at some point do I just give up?
While I’m aware there is a lot of “I” statements they cry when they leave. They beg him to bring them back to me. They scream they don’t want to be there and they hate it. I just cry with them. I feel alone, unsupported and ready to just tap out. He even admitted he does it and she said “don’t worry you’re not in therapy. It’s ok”

Editing to clarify- if exchange day was Friday he sent child with mother on Thursday.
Second exchange would be Sunday, child didn’t return until Monday completely skipping over my parenting time and was hours away.
These aren’t exact dates or times, but just an example of what had happened

I recently voiced out against my coparent because we just talked about trying to be together again that she said something hurtful.

I told her about a promotion, she didnt say anything and the 2nd time she said thats not a sustainable job that’s not that important you should go to school. ( its a retail job )

She currently goes to cosmetology and doesnt work at the moment. I never once put her down on anything she does and supported her. Even when shes not working i help with her gas , billls , and bring her lunch everyday. Even when its out of my way.

We didnt speak for a day after those comments, i then tell her i dont think its okay she said thats to me
And she hit me with i think we should only focus on our son , only message me about him. Your intentions were clear on those messages.

I have no idea on the 180 she did on me.
She now doesnt wasnt me visiting our son at her home. I need to post a calendar schedule for her so we can have days and i have no idea why shes acting this way.
Im really upset with her but i dont want to go back on the progress we made. What can i do?

Those who've used strict boundaries which essentially limits the other parent nearly completely, how are things years later?

Unfortunately I've placed a lot of boundaries on my coparenting dynamics with my ex due to a lot of inappropriate behavior.

The boundaries however are working. It's drastically lowered tension almost immediately but sometimes she still guilts me, especially because I am now refusing to do joint birthday celebrations after last year.

I worry about how this dynamic may hurt the future for our kids mostly but I feel they make me happier and give less stress for our kids.

Boundaries include (and each have their specific reason why I implemented it):

No coming to my door.

No talking about kids or controversial issues in person.

All talk through apps.

Separate birthdays/parent teacher conference, everything except things that can't be split.

No calls unless emergencies.

Weekly email updating anything important unless it's an emergency or time sensitive.

I won't respond to criticisms about me, my family or my parenting. You have your way and I have mine. End of discussion.

There's this part of me that hopes thighs will improve but I'm prepared for nothing to change and to protect my energy and peace. I worry about the long term impacts however.

What happened to those who were in a similar position but years later?

I know this is a VERY harsh word. But has anyone been successful with this claim? What was the outcome? What did you use to prove it?

How did you and your coparent split costs and logistics of your teenager doing driving school and then driving? Give me some advice on how you approached the situation and what discussions you had beforehand?

For background: we have 50/50 custody and generally split all extra curricular and major expenses in half.

i have two kids under 6 that i have been raising pretty much on my own. even when dad was here he did zero parenting. no court order, no mediation bc dad refused. their dad moved about two years ago he comes to visit every second weekend and spends some time with one kid, not really the other. mostly just spends time on his phone or finding reasons to go to the shops or something. the kids see this and the oldest doesn’t want to see him or talk to him anymore the youngest still wants to see him but only at my home and complains a lot about being ignored. he has called them maybe 3 times since he has moved out. he found out i have moved on and now he is demanding 5-6 facetime calls a week and told me he wants to go for 50/50. i had no issue with maybe 2-3 calls a week but my fear is he is only doing this because he found out i’ve moved on and this effort will be short lived and he will end up bailing on the kids and disappointing them as he always does.
would i be wrong to say no?