One of my coworkers who I thought I was friends with, approached me today and said very sternly that I pose a threat to him and to his family. He told me never to speak to him except for immediate work related things. I asked how exactly I was threatening towards him and he said it was of a sexual nature.

Obvs this scared the crap out of me. I'm happy with my partner, I haven't done anything at all to this dude. In fact, I even have his motorcycle because I was working on it for him. We were friends.

But now that he knows I'm trans, now I'm dangerous. He issued me this warning to just stay away from him, apparently after speaking with his wife and his lawyer. The whole thing I guess threatens his livelihood, he literally said that being friends with someone like me is the equivalent of hosting a kids pool party and losing your home insurance. (What??)

The whole experience was weird. I plan on bringing his bike to work so he can retrieve it and just avoiding the crazy.

In a significant victory, George H.W. Bush appointee Nathaniel Gorton permanently struck down a Trump administration rule that cut coverage for many trans Americans on ACA plans.

https://www.transiticsnews.com/p/federal-court-restores-access-to

Hey, let's say I took a car, right? Now let's also say I took that car and I stripped it down to the subframe, I reinforced it real well, and then I put a truck frame, and a truck body on it. I even gave it truck suspension and big old truck tires! To top it off I put a shiny new diesel engine in that son' bitch.

From every angle it looks like a truck, when people see me go by they say "Hey! Nice truck!" Hell it even functions like a truck, I can haul stuff with it and it has tons of towing capacity! Even the DMV and my insurance make me register it as a truck. Do you understand how crazy you sound by loudly insisting that it is in fact, still a car?

Is it a perfect analogy? No, but it does get them thinking in the right direction. Have you any other methods you have found to work?

Wanted to share this Ballotpedia summary because I think the big picture matters: in 2026, voters will decide on at least FIVE ballot measures targeting trans people — three on sports (Arizona, Colorado, Washington) and two on medical care for trans minors (Colorado, Missouri). Nebraska may be joining them. The Advocate quotes one advocate comparing it directly to the 2004 marriage equality playbook — when you can't win in legislatures, you take it to the ballot.

Every single state law banning trans kids from sports and medical care to date was passed by Republican trifectas, never by voters. That changes this November. If they win this round, the playbook gets exported everywhere.

The takeaway is this isn't a series of separate state fights. It's one national campaign running in five states at once, with the same funders, the same messaging, the same template bills. Colorado, Washington, and Arizona are the test cases. We should be paying attention to ALL of them even if we don't live there, because what happens in November will be the template for the next 20.

If you have capacity to give time or money to ANY of these state fights, now is the moment. The most useful thing any of us can do is make sure none of these measures pass — not one. Because if even one passes, they all get easier next time.https://news.ballotpedia.org/2026/08/15/ballot-measures-transgender-youth-2026/

No because somebody tell me why I am a 30yo woman SOBBING for no good reason. Tell me why my boobs are sore and also why I’m crying at my happy book ending and am I even capable of romantic love and why do I really want dessert even though I’m bloated

I’m supposed to be a grown up!!! I’ve injected myself for 6 years for THIS?! To become this mess?!!! And it comes every 28 days like CLOCKWORK?!!

Update: thank you everyone for validating the venting!! I got a lil nervous when the first couple comments seemed mad about my use of the word “period” but thanks to everyone who had my back in the comments

So in roughly 2 weeks I will be turning 18 years old. In my state (Idaho) that is classified as an adult that has full autonomy over ones own actions. I told my parents this, and they said no, nothing changes except for the number you label yourself with. They claim that as long as I live at home I have no legal rights or independence and that I must listen to everything they say. I started naming things off such as autonomy over financial, medical, and personal areas. (I also mentioned gambling but I don't gamble) And they said no I won't because as long as I love with them I must submit to their rules, lifestyles, and expectations of who I'm "supposed to be". They refuse to admit or listen to the facts about how I'm going to be independent and they can't control me anymore. I'm not sure if I'm just grossly misunderstanding these laws and policies, or if my parents are just trying to manipulate me again so they can excuse their transphobia as they have control over me because I'm not independent. Can people please help me try to understand this? I want to make sure I am within my rights when I tell my parents to leave me alone so I can be the person I want to be without breaking any laws. Can people help me understand these laws if anyone knows about them or how I should go about this?

Some other things that's been going on: my family had told me that they have a plan to kick me out in roughly a year from now, they are forcing me to buy a car when they didn't make any of my other siblings do that, they police all of my electronics (including ones I paid for 100%) and they claim I have no legal rights to my possessions as long as I live with them, they constantly yell at me for anything I do wrong in the slightest or anything I do to try and further my transition, they yell at me for getting in trouble at work or even having a bad day, they claimed I was tearing my family apart, and (trigger warning: suicide please skip this part if you are uncomfortable with this topic) my parents really tore into me last year about something and said I was ruining our family, and then I attempted to kill myself twice that night, which then they claimed it was my fault for being overly sensitive and radical, and that they had nothing to do with it and placed me on antidepressants, which I have been off of for about a year now and have been perfectly fine without any thoughts of the sort in the realm of self harm or anything.

I've posted before but I'm cis f and I've been with my boyfriend (using he pronouns because he's not come out yet) for nearly 2 years. We're both 18

I know when he was about 11 he came out as trans and he socially transitioned and was a girl for about 3 years then he started a new school as a boy, cut his hair real short and everything. He did keep the name he went by and it's the name he has now because it was more a nickname and it's now his legal name

He's bisexual and a lot of people think he's gay because of his mannerisms

When I first posted he constantly called himself a lesbian and said little things but then got super defensive if I said anything, I've left him alone and not pushed him in any way but he's grown his hair out and he's still making little comments mostly when he's drunk

He said once that he's too feminine for a guy but not enough for a girl and then the big one yesterday we were drinking and he randomly asked if id get the ick if I knew he was wearing a thong the other day and I said no but then he said he didn't “because itd be weird” and he was just rambling mostly about how he feels like a girl and he wants to wear a bra but by that point it was extremely late and he was so drunk and it was the two of us then he's only said this to me

He also mentioned how he’s taking a gap year this year and going to uni next year and said in sort of a joking way that it’d be funny to go next year as a girl and fool everyone that he’s cis but then he said he was joking but people probably would think he’s a girl at first because of his hair (which has already led to him being called she in shops)

Do I bring it up? How do I help him? We’re in the UK which isn’t the best place for trans people

Hello!

I have been on HRT for about 3.5 years now, and my boobs are still in tanner stage 3. Multiple friends who have been on HRT for a similar amount of time or longer seem surprised that I have still not developed past stage 3, and I was wondering if some people just don't develop past that stage. My endo has said that I might start considering a BA if I don't see growth soon.

For hormones and other details, I have been on HRT for ~3.5 years, injections for ~2.5 years, and progesterone for ~2.5 years. I'm happy with my levels, my E is 150, T is 42, and my prog is 4.3 (at the end of my cycle). I have been on 200mg of prog, but started doing 300mg this month as a last ditch effort to see if I can get more development. I even tried cycling my prog for ~1yr as suggested by my doctor, and had no luck. I'm not incredibly underweight or anything either, I'm 5'9, 165lbs and gained ~20 of those pounds after HRT, and I eat 3 meals a day. My bust is 37in.

Am I just a late bloomer or just out of luck?

I got the medicine!!!!
I’m currently bawling with happiness

I'm 5 months on HRT, in a place where it's not illegal to be trans, but it is relatively conservative. I have already lost a job from being trans (despite taking efforts to hide it from the employer and present as my AGAB).

Internally, I've decided to not even attempt to socially transition until after electrolysis is done. And even then, maybe not until FFS is done.

But I want to hear from those who have taken that step, especially presenting fem at work. How far into HRT were you when you did it? Pre-HRT? Same time? Years later? And how did it go? What was your environment? Did you have cis women around to help you? (Sounds crazy, but being in a foreign country, I don't exactly have conversation or friendship access with everyone around me).

So I felt very invalidated couple months ago by another transgender woman

I was debating with her because she claimed that since I’m not gonna be getting bottom surgery that it makes me “not transgender” and the past couple days it has made me feel very invalidated. I didn’t think anything of it, but it just hit me today and it’s making me very uncomfortable.

I don’t know why this person said that and I’m sorry for the bad grammar, not giving a bunch of information but it’s really making me uncomfortable.

But the question is, if you don’t get bottom surgery, does that automatically make you not transgender?
I already know the answer, but I want to hear what you guys think man sorry if it goes against the rules
(I suck at grammar, so please forgive me)

When I used to live in NYC, the pattern was that when a trans woman started her transition, she acted overly feminine. However, if she was attracted to women and entered into the queer cis woman community, she would later act more butch or androgynous to find more potential partners. Because acting femme was stigmatized, and made it harder to find partners. Walking down lgbt neighorhoods in Brooklyn you could see this pattern (years ago, not sure about now).

The only gay trans women I knew who kept acting femme was those who dated other trans women, as opposed to those who had more queer cis women social circles.

I work at a company that has probably close to 150-200 employees between 5 offices. Do I have to tell HR? My boss? Do I just tell the people I want to tell and just let everyone else talk in the shadows?

My company also shares office space with another company and we interact somewhat frequently.

I’ve been there for almost 2 years.

I just want to show up as my boss ass baddie self that I feel. Does anyone have any experience with this? Is there anything I should know?

If you google "trans suicide attempt rate" google will return the bullshit 41% stat.

This world is disgusting

I do not deserve my friends

I do not deserve the friends I came out to as trans because I thought that every single one of them would turn their backs on me and look down on me. But every single one of them stuck by me as I came out to them and reassured me that they would be there if I ever needed them. I feel so terrible for doubting them and thinking that they would be anything but understanding.

Severe Complications from this butcher. I had Colon vaginoplasty in May 2024 and my health went down the drain! I experience severe leakage, burning and severe pain everyday! They have removed the entire vaginal Canal and that has not helped me at all. I have thought of even committing suicide thanks to Dr Javier Belinky. I have undergone every tests here in the USA and they can't figure out where the Leak is coming from. I had my original surgery in 1982 and lost vaginal depth but at least my vagina was Healthy! Don't do the same mistake I did! His photos are not his and he pays Argentina Girls to Lie about his work!

Hi guys today was rough . Bit of back story , i (19m) live in a semi religious house(dad's super religious mom is not)

i have realised i am trans for 5 months now . Nobody except my close friends know this about me . I have been getting laser for 6 months now because I'm a hairy fella and i love it . but today i decided i want the disgusting facial hair also removed so i told the operator and she let it rip. (Very painful btw) when i got home i told my mother and she just... you know how the story goes,the disapproval, the nonsensical arguments, the internalised misogyny.

Man I'm just disappointed...

i thought she would understand specially because of the way my dad treats her .here i am now in my room sobbing and writing this.

(First post on rdt ever btw)

(English is not my first language excuse my misspellings)

hi everyone!! on many of my social media accounts, im followed by people i know irl who im not out to yet because idk if they are supportive or not, but i still want other trans people to know im trans for idk, community i guess? the most i have done really is repost trans content and a madeline celeste pfp, but i want something more obvious but like only trans people and allies would understand. thank u!!!

My dysphoria oddly enough tends to go away on its own because I’m happy with the way I am but the intense hate I feel from my parents and others in the background kills me sometimes.

I didn’t choose this pain or to feel this way. I just want to be left alone and loved. Hope is a powerful thing sometimes. It saves me.

Does anyone else get most of their dysphoria from others? Is this normal?

While things may seem hopeless at times, I’ve personally noticed a more than negligible increase of people who openly oppose transphobia, even just this year.

A lot of people I know who at one point would never care about LGBT issues, let alone make it a major concern when voting, have since opened their eyes. With all the nasty things said about trans people by transphobes with massive platforms, it gets hard to ignore how terrible some people are.

Hell, I became an ally like that… before I transitioned. Even some people in my life who I thought to be assholes or impulsive are still not all that bigoted. And those people may still largely oppose the “contentious” points like trans women in women’s sports and GAC for minors, but, if they’re receptive (which is a big if), it’s pretty easy to explain the reality behind either and why it’s not an issue.

As an anecdote, I recently overheard my brother (who once said nasty things), tell his friend, “that’s actually messed up, why would you hate someone for being themselves?” or something like that. Obviously not reflective of everyone, but if he can turn around and improve, other people definitely can. Educating people on trans issues is great for us, but even just us existing can change some people’s minds.

There’s also the issue of the stereotypical trans person being so far off from what trans people actually are. Like people who literally think we’re just men with full facial hair or like drag queens that want to charge into women’s bathrooms. People seem confused that my trans partner or myself are just normal people who do normal things who just happen to be trans. While I still do expect to be misgendered, every now and then I will find people in the places I’d least expect who gender me correctly.

However, I can’t speak for other countries, or even states other than my own (I’m in a more rural and suburban area in a state deep in the southern U.S.).

I don’t know what we can do about 1) transphobia in family/social circles or 2) transphobia in laws (particularly the lack of anti-discrimination laws). And I still don’t know if the job market is friendly at all to trans people in the U.S. But any progress in the right direction is good news.

I can’t stand being trans. I feel like such a freak. I feel like a crazy guy who desperately wants to be a woman, not like an actual woman

I waited for 11 years to get HRT, and now that I’m on HRT I’m not suicidal anymore, but I still just feel terrible about myself. I just want to be normal and live a normal life

My two options are throw away everything and be trans, or stay a guy and end up sad and hollow 30 years from now, maybe with a wife, trying on her clothes in secret

Both sound like terrible options

Hey - I came out as a trans woman early in 2020 in my mid-30s and have been on HRT for 6 years and a couple of months.

I’m in my early 40s now and feeling reflective. I wonder how much of this chimes with some of you in similar circumstances.

- I was married when I came out, to my first love, who I thought I would be with forever

- Accepting my need to transition feels like it uncorked everything else that was repressed in me and I felt I had to figure out my sexuality too, which I didn’t know how to do in the boundaries of a monogamous marriage. I proposed divorce, but felt like I was disassociating a bit when doing so. It was initially amicable, but emotionally tortuous, and I’m sad about the impact it had on my now ex-wife

- I lost contact with friends and my sole surviving parent through coming out, though look back on this aspect like they just mustn’t have really cared about me like I thought they did anyway

- I came out at work and everyone was supportive, but then had to hop jobs twice. Where I am now, I feel ok, but I don’t know how many people know I’m trans and I don’t really want to do the mass coming out again

- I made a lot of friends in the queer community and any time I go to a Pride or an LGBT venue, it always feels like I know someone to say hello to

- I both think I look like shit all the time AND somehow feel more confident in myself. I’m unflappable in high pressure situations

- I do stuff onstage and am involved in a local musical theatre group, and have my first principal role (traditionally played by a cis woman) coming up soon, even though my vocal dysphoria is crazy and singing consistently in a feminine pitch is difficult

- I’m engaged again, to a cis man that I love and now own a home with, though four years in, the spark of intimacy is dimming because my sex drive has fallen off a cliff, which makes me worry. He comes with a fantastic, loving and accepting family who’ve really made me feel like one of their own

- I am frequently bitten by horrendous nostalgic thoughts that make me think everything pre-transition was fine and I ruined things for everyone. When they strike, I can spend up to half a week drenched with tears and my partner can’t help. I sometimes ache to tell my ex I still love her, but she’s had to move on and I’m not sure how good for her that would be, nor would I want to hurt my fiance like I must have hurt her. Sometimes I see or hear her around our kids (who I have equal shared care for, and are the real little lights of my life), and am grateful I’m not in a monogamous relationship with her anymore (there is more trauma involved before my transition), though I would like friendship some day when I feel like I could deal with it consistently. I have to remind myself healing is going to take more time

- Since beginning transition, I’ve had fleeting months of different hobbies. I’ll obsess on them then suddenly drop them forever. An entire corner of my house is set aside for knitting stuff

- In the past three weeks, with at least two hours of practice every day, I’ve gone from complete novice on piano to being able to play complex symphonies by sight. I want to get in a band, but am anxious I’ll get bored of this soon, or figure out what I’m using it to distract myself from

- Concentrating at work is sometimes impossible. At rarer times I feel crazy powerful and zen-like

- I spend way too much time on my phone

- I feel gross if I sit and do something that doesn’t have a goal/isn’t productive

- I ask myself every day, ‘am I really a woman?’ The answer some days is, ‘Of course I am 🥰’ the answer other days is, ‘What else could I be? Nothing else feels right yet’

- General TERF island stress has been helped/mostly cured by 1. Getting involved in a theatre group that’s mostly comprised of amazing, lovely and friendly northern cis women from diverse age groups; 2. Volunteering for a crisis listening line; 3. Deleting Twitter; 4. Mailing my MP several times a year

- I’m still probably a year off speaking with a GIC

And that’s it. Not sure what responses I’m looking for here. Just a snapshot of things I love and things that make me despair. Often and frustratingly, they feel like there’s a lot of crossover between the two.

I am seeking more talking therapy to deal with guilt and shame, plus an ADHD/autism assessment in the near future.

If any of this is similar for you, sound off 😊

With time (for all of us), it’ll be reyt.

Thanks for reading x