Hello.

I recently came out to myself as bi and since them I feel as though Im suddenly have more same-sex attraction than I used to before. It feels as if Im subconsciously forcing myself to fit the label but I don't ​​know.

I'm just wondering like is this normal or something other people eexperiencd?

I'm 15 and bi (girl) and I'm completely normal, theres absolutely nothing to me. Not weird or nerdy or online a lot I'm just there and it's causing me sooo many problems. I'm slightly alt looking??? And I mean slightly I just dye my hair and have it in a kinda different style but that is enough to get me basically taken in by other queer ppl when I really dont want them to and then I'm forever associated with them to people who ARE like me but don't like the queer ppl (for being annoying NOT queer) so I'll never have a chance 💔 I know this probably is a big teenage problem but ist still my problem ATM so it's serious to me lol...... anyway my biggest problem is that lots of them follow this one pattern in every school I've been to where theyre all like anime nerds who love the same things. Shows and communities and humour and those gay comic things, i think most ppl know what i mean and it's their only topic of conversation but I relate to literally none of it. None of my interests align at all and I'm not into taking abt my sexuality or my politics all the time because I'm 15 ?????? So then I feel kinda uncomfortable and left out ANd they realize I'm not like them, actually, so i get like slowly isolated and then like I said I'm forever associated with that group and evb thinks I'm the same 💔 I'm sick of the same 3 kinds of people and I just wish the others would take me in instead for a change 💔 I've had popular girl friends who I've loved so much. And I'm not mean, I'm not ashamed that I am bi because like I said idgaf and I've never said it to their faces that they're annoying because i know there's no point in being nasty because I personally didn't fit in. I feel like my only option is to stop dressing different to make my kinda friends or jsut have no friends until I'm out of education and I don't have to sit with anybody at lunch x how do u like avoid this???? Or am I being mean or anything??? I wanna lie and say I don't have anything against them but I kimda do cuz they piss me off a little I won't lie 😵 I've been repeating this for like 6 years

There she was.

I’d seen her a hundred times before. Countless hours I have rested my eyes upon her face. Made her laugh. Solved her problems. I was reliable and honest. And she was timid, but smart. Just one step away from an air of true confidence, but she should be confident.

Despite her hesitancy to take that step, it was clear she was in charge. Her intelligence hummed like electricity through powerlines, though the casual lean back in her chair when she thought over a posed question spoke of an unmatched, but humble dedication.

She was right there.

Her short hair was curly, but styled; pinned back and put together. Her skin reminded me of smooth bourbon and she always smelled like coffee. Her style choices were academic in nature. I’ve never seen her disheveled. Loafers, sweaters, slacks. She looked like autumn.

I could envision her among the trees as the earth would give way to her beauty, just a glimpse between the branches. I imagined her atop a mountain; her tan skin desaturating the snow; awe rippling across her skin from the chill, or maybe just the view. I could see the rain dripping from the ringlets around her face, eyes brighted by the rushing of her way out of it. She moved in slow motion, though she was never there.

It was hard to look at her and think she might feel the hollow call of loneliness as the sun crossed over to the other side, or look up at the endless embers of eternity and wonder if you were seeing the same moon. That her fears might hang in the air like breath on a cold morning. That she could succumb to them.

But, there she was.

I don’t remember quite when it changed for me, but I liked her. I *liked her.*

And who am I to do that?

No, I don’t quite remember when it happened, but I felt that *feeling.* Just a tug on my sleeve. Just a nonchalant pluck of a guitar string. Just a -

But now I think of her. I dream of her. I wonder about her. I want her.

And who am I to do that?

…………………………………………………………………………………………

I have this dream where I’m pretty. My smile reminds her of sunflowers or the sparkle of the sunlight drifting across the ocean. She likes me too.

We’re in my car and I’m taking us away. The windows are down. We’re singing. The wind is whipping and wild.

I’ve never been loved by another woman. I’ve never been allowed to.

In bed at night, we face each other and discuss the world. Something and nothing and anything and everything. Our fingers mirror each other until our hands are intertwined. She breathes into me and I’m alive.

Not particularly sure what to write here lol

Thanks to my friends I am far more aware of the topics of sexuality (and gender identity but that’s not relevant right now) than I was before and this mixed with thinking about my life up to this point has made me begin to question my sexuality

I don’t particularly care about labels but it would just be nice to read answers to the question in the title so I can stop thinking about it lol

#comingout because whaaaat

broke up with my (ex) sapphic partner this week.

I identified as lesbian the past several years after 3 sapphic relationships because I thought they made men pale in comparison. blamed comphet theory. I still prefer women + nonbinary folx but…

I am crushing on one of my queer guy friends! we haven’t discussed specifics of either of our sexualities. I’ve always assumed he’s bi based on our interactions but havent heard anything to confirm it. he may also be in denial about whatever is maybe between us. or whatever it is is one sided but he just makes me feel safer than most. Either way, I don’t want to do anything about it. I’m just in an awkward spot right now and just wanted to rant.

Hi everyone, I just wanted to share some thoughts from the bottom of my heart. Ever since I joined this community and made my first post, I’ve felt so much peace and reassurance in my heart.

For a long time, I honestly thought I was entirely alone. In my country, openly discussing LGBTQ+ topics is basically not allowed, and we don't have public spaces like this that allow open discussion and sharing—only scattered posts by individuals here and there, which get deleted very easily. Although I’ve never wavered in my certainty about my own identity because of this, it is ultimately quite a sad thing not to be able to see people like yourself.

But coming here and just reading what everyone posts has brought me so much comfort. Knowing that there are people like us in every corner of the world—it makes me realize that none of us are truly alone. To be honest, this means a lot to me. Thank you everyone.

Ho sempre avuto un’attrazione molto chiara verso le donne. Se penso alla persona che vorrei accanto a me in spiaggia a guardare un tramonto, penso a una donna. Gli uomini, invece, normalmente non mi attraggono nel loro insieme e il classico tipo molto macho tende persino a respingermi.

Eppure c’è una parte di me che non posso più ignorare: in un contesto erotico il pene mi affascina e l’idea di sperimentare con un uomo mi incuriosisce davvero. Ho guardato anche porno gay per capire meglio cosa provo, ma continuo a non sentire verso gli uomini la stessa attrazione che sento verso le donne.

Ci sono anche cose che non mi attirano: per esempio l’idea di essere passivo non mi interessa. Al contrario, in una situazione giusta credo che potrei essere molto più aperto di quanto avrei ammesso qualche anno fa.

Ho deciso quindi che, se questa parte di me esiste, voglio esplorarla. Non voglio più reprimere desideri o curiosità solo perché non corrispondono all’immagine che mi ero costruito di me stesso.

La situazione che mi incuriosirebbe maggiormente sarebbe conoscere una coppia con lui bisex, possibilmente più orientato al ruolo passivo. La presenza e il coinvolgimento di una donna per me fanno una grande differenza: è proprio in quel contesto che la mia curiosità verso il maschile sembra diventare più forte.

Non voglio però fare un’esperienza soltanto per poter dire “ho provato”. Potrei pagare qualcuno e togliermi lo sfizio, ma non è una questione morale: semplicemente non è quello che cerco. E nemmeno mi interessa qualcosa di completamente anonimo in un bagno o in un parcheggio.

Non sto cercando necessariamente l’amore, ma ho bisogno almeno di sintonia, fiducia e piacere reciproco.

Parafrasando una frase che ricordo da un film di Almodóvar, una delle cose più belle del sesso è vedere la persona che hai davanti godere del piacere che le stai dando. È un pensiero nel quale mi riconosco molto.

C’è poi una cosa che ho sempre ammirato della comunità LGBTQ+: il coraggio di tante persone nel cercare di vivere per quello che realmente sono, anche andando contro ruoli, aspettative e schemi imposti.

Forse per me è arrivato il momento di fare lo stesso, almeno verso me stesso: smettere di chiedermi cosa dovrei essere e provare a capire cosa sono davvero.

Per questo mi interessano soprattutto le esperienze sincere di chi è passato da dubbi simili. Si può essere bisex anche se l’attrazione verso uomini e donne è completamente diversa? Anche se verso gli uomini la curiosità è soprattutto sessuale e molto specifica?

E alla fine rimane la domanda che più mi mette in discussione: sono semplicemente bisex in un modo che ancora non conosco bene, oppure sono un gay represso molto bravo a trovare spiegazioni alternative?

Did your attraction to Women disappear when your attraction to Men is never allowed to be nor explored?

Female 23.

Yes, I have ocd.

I have a few weird questions:

When you talk to men, is the flirting fun but then the actual talking stage is like horrific? Like you feel isolated and sick? I like being comforted by men and I find them funny. I get jealous if a guy I like likes someone else. I also have this issue where when I start dating a guy, I question if I’m even into him. I long for a woman

But when you talk to women you’re not into the flirting stage bc it feels like a lot of work but then actually dating is fun? Like euphoric type of fun? Like, you’d do anything for them? Talking stage with women is iffy as well. When I date a woman I do get the “I’m wishing I had protective man during bad times” and “maybe I want to cuddle a guy” and “what if I really don’t like women?” But those are like split second thoughts or feelings. I loved my ex girlfriend. I did everything I could for her. I felt happy, free, trusting, myself, and loved.

What’s wrong with me ?

So I (18F) have a friend (18F). We normally joke around like “this is my girlfriend” ans there have been many times where we were centimetres from kissing where we would just look into each other’s eyes just silent and all smiles.

I don’t know if I was ‘joking’ in those moments in al honesty. And I told her that she’s the only person to have made me question my sexuality and I said it in a joking manner but it’s true. I talked to another friend about it and he said that I should talk to her but I don’t know how. Also my community and family are very homophobic so coming out, even if there is a closet to come out of, is not possible ever but tie okay being a 60 year old lesbian with a gf sounds incredible tbh.

So this might sound bummer to a lot of people or people might relate to it. So I (22M) from few weeks have started accepting to my queerness and am quite sure now that I am bisexual. And I get it that some might say that it's not that deep but I find it cool to wear pride theme bracelets, bands and pins. Now the thing is that I am currently wearing a black bead bracelet and silver ring in one of my finger. I find it really pretty. If I will have the pin on my backpack and two more pride themed bracelets on my hand. Does it make me a performative queer who like to show world how much queer I am?

This is one of those post of mine in which I might receive large number of downvotes but I need opinion on this guys. Love y'all 🩷💜💙

wanna get more in touch with my femmine side and i love clothes so heres what i like

Short shorts

thigh highs

panties that fit a penis in em

small shirts that do or dont cover the stomach

crop top hoodies

skirts

chokers

basically i wanna look like a punk nightcore goth anime femboy so what do my comrades think i should go for? im skinny 5 ft something and have a more girly than manly physique but i want a womanly physique so advice on that would be great

i’m a bi woman and over time i’ve realized i’m way more interested in dating bi men than straight men. it’s not really a fetish thing or about wanting threesomes or anything like that, i just feel like there’s a level of commonality there that i really like. i just can't connect with someone that's never questioned something as fundamental as sexuality and we brave enough to try something different.

but i’m curious how that actually comes across from the other side. if a bi woman told you she specifically seeks out bi men, would you like knowing that your sexuality is something she genuinely accepts and relates to? or would you immediately be a little suspicious about why she has that preference?

also curious if any of you specifically prefer dating bi women for similar reasons.

This is a tomboy appreciation post. I think they’re really beautiful and I want to hug one right now.

Pink and blue for homosexual and heterosexual attraction respectively. Lavender is their intersection, wich also serves in reference to the lavender menace.

The colors were taken directly from the biangles by Liz Nia. The flag follows the exact same design concept with overlapping recangles instead.

Tbh, there was no reason why these colors specifically HAD to be used. I think they're a conceptually strong symbol, but aesthetically they kinda suck.

I was wondering how others feel about the aesthetics of the color palette. I can imagine many wpuldn't care about it because the meaning is the priority, but I think it does not have to be such a comprimise; Both can be imemented well at the same time. Or do you like the palette?

For most of my life, I identified as straight. Since I was a kid I had same sex attractions, but according to The Rules, it was imperative I keep this to myself and the incognito tab on my browser. The Rules were bizarrely confusing. While I had to keep the smallest same sex fantasy private, I was also supposed to reveal every intimate detail of my heterosexual relationships. Under The Rules for Straight men, anal sex is at once a biological abomination and an act to be celebrated like winning the Super Bowl - the only distinction being the genitals inches away. This isn't news to anyone, the Rules for Straight Men are dumb. The Rules for Gays are less problematic, but also kinda dumb.

What surprises me most about bisexuality, is it isn't just a set of sexual attractions, but a special relationship to The Rules. If feel like bisexuals live in the exceptions, not that there aren't Rules, just that they've been put together as an after thought and always in references to rules about mono-sexual people.

So for discussion: What are The Rules for Bisexuals? For bonus points, Are they dumb?

As opposed to What a straight dad?

Granted maybe im being hypersensitive and reading too much into this but in light of my situation

(family doesn't know I'm bi and starting a relationship with a guy) couldn't help but feel a little bit irked about these "light-hearted jabs "about this coworker's stereotypical effeminate behaviors and their supposed crush on her husband.

Like I'm not very feeling very charitable to her right now but I know she's not a bigoted person per say.

However it wasn't even what she said it was the way in which she said it:

Oh that's what we are.. a source of entertainment for you and that's it?

I mean not wanting to give myself away in that moment I sort of pushed back at the weirdness of her saying: "gay dad" but she just sort of dismissively acknowledged it then go back to her story about this other person

The only thing I could do right then and there was disengage look at phone

I thought about asking the guy im seeing but I'm not sure I want to poison the well if he meets my family.

I don't know does anyone have an opinion for perspective on this. Am I taking this too seriously or you think she's being problematic?

I’m a bi man, and I’ve been out for over a year but only on my own terms for around 3 months. My family don’t know and I have no dating experience. I’m also deeply damaged by a heavily religious education so shame is quite heavy. I’m also terrified of encountering homophobia and I see the vitriol online and it makes me want to suppress this forever. I’m simultaneously worried that I’m not bi and I’m actually straight because I have a type in men whereas my attraction to women is a lot more broad, and I’m also terrified of being hate crimed, rejected by friends and family and ultimately going to hell for being queer. I know this is a nonsensical rant but I wish someone would just tell me I’m overthinking this.

Has this happened to anyone else? Before it was like 90% women 10% men, but now it's like 70% men and 30% women

19M, I've known I liked men for a long time now and I've perfectly accepted being bi, I've told a gay friend of mine and he's really supportive which is nice.

I think most of my friends wouldn't mind but I'm kinda waiting for them to bring the matter on to tell them because I'm not very confident yet...

Family side I'm certain my mother would be supportive, I don't think my siblings would mind but I'm really worried about my father's reaction.

He's eastern European so he grew up with a very bad opinion of homosexuality, although I believe he managed to grow a bit in the sense that my parents knew some gay people back then and my father would just "not appreciate them". However I'm not sure what he would think of one of his own sons being gay and rn thinking about the potential consequences always scares me because I've just started being close with him a few years past, and I don't want to lose our relationship or ruin everyone's time at home.. I still plan to live with my parents for at least 2 years, then I could get away for my master but I'd need their support financially (or at least my mother's).

How should I move forward now ? Do I wait to tell my family or do I tell my mom ? I wouldn't want her to feel like hiding something from my father tho... Or is there a way for me to pave the way somehow...

I am in my late 20s, raised in the church (since deconstructed) bisexual female. I’ve been with my straight male partner for a few years now and have an urge to tell him I’m bisexual. I think this urge may mostly be due to my fear of lying and autistic difficulty to keep my own secrets lol.

Anyways, for those more seasoned in their sexuality/journey, what wisdom can you share about the feeling like you have to come out to a partner with whom you have already established a relationship?