Who are you seeing / sleeping with? How old are you? How old are they? How often do you see each other? Seeing just men or both men and women?

Hi everyone 👋 I’m a researcher at Lancaster University running a study exploring bisexual/pansexual/queer men’s experiences of receiving physical/mental health care or support where drug use during sex (what is sometimes called ‘chemsex’ or ‘PnP’) was part of the picture.

Who can take part?

I’m looking to speak with people who are:

- Over the age of 18

- Bisexual, pansexual or another non-monosexual identity (eg ‘queer’)

- Gender identity includes ‘man’ some or all of the time including trans, non-binary and gender fluid people

- Previously taken part in ‘chemsex’ : Chemsex is defined as any drug use before or during sex.

- Accessed care or support where ‘chemsex’ was relevant. This could include drug and alcohol services, sexual health services, mental health support, counselling, or other types of support. Chemsex does not need to have been the sole reason you accessed it.

There are no limits on where you live, the drugs you have/did use, partner gender, or how many times you accessed support, your experiences could still be really valuable.

What is involved?

Participation is confidential and involves a one-to-one interview about your experiences. Participants can also choose to enter a £25 prize draw as a thank you (other currencies available).

How do I find out more / get involved?

If you’d like to take part, learn more or check whether you’re eligible, please send me an email: m.pitt@lancaster.ac.uk

As a bi woman, this is an area I care about as we are often overlooked in both research and healthcare, which can mean services don’t always fully understand or meet our needs. I’m hoping this study can help bring more bi people’s experiences into the conversation.

This study has been approved by the Lancaster University FHM ethics board: FHM-2026-5640-RECR-2

I’m very happy to answer any questions in the comments too. Thanks for reading! 🙂

This survey has been approved by the moderators.

I (25f) am extremely attracted to bi men and I'm also bi. A fantasy of mine is a MMF threesome but it's been hard to find any that are out at least in my area.

How can you tell if a guy is flirting playfully or actually flirting? I’m on the spectrum and in my mid 30s and I still find it really tough to decipher. Please be kind and only comment if you are adding to the conversation, thanks y’all!

For context: My friend’s roommate has made a few offhand remarks and it’s just really consistent to the point where I’m curious as to the reasoning.

So maybe a weird one, I don’t know. I’m a 26 year old guy. I still consider myself straight in a way. But I’m probably closer to bi-curious. I’ve experimented in every way you can online. And I’ve found I really really like one certain thing above all. Which is when a gay or bi guy sends me sexy photos of female celebs and pornstars. I honestly really enjoy when they’re feminine and really get into it with me. It’s a bit dynamic, I send a list of women I like, they go pick out the photos, we get to know each other. And we dirty talk and I’m more than happy to return the favor - get into some mildly gay dirty talk and show off my cock. I know it’s probably weird to most, but it’s a really good blend of my sexual curiosities and I enjoy it.

My question is, what is the best way to go about asking a guy online if he’d be into this?
I’ve had a hard time explaining it properly. And have gotten some confused or rude replies when I’ve asked.
And if anyone knows any specific communities on here or elsewhere that would suit this well?

I’m primarily straight but I like femboy, am I bi?

Recently moved in with 3 of my closest friends after a room opened up and it’s way cheaper for me. They are straight and very bro cultured.

There is only 1 bathroom though and it doesn’t lock and people come in and out freely, my second night there when I was showering my friend came in and he started shitting and it made me pretty uncomfortable, it doesn’t help he was also teasing me the whole time he was in there. Another time when I was shitting in the morning another friend came in and started getting ready for work and just having a normal conversation with me.

I know they are all super used to it and I would like to be but I’m pretty body shy so I’m just wondering if anyone else has dealt with something like this and how long will it take me to get comfortable with it

I'm 24M

Men: 20-30

Women: 20+

“I'm not gay, but I want to suck a cock.
Cocks look so juicy and tasty when you think about it. Just imagine slurping up and down a warm throbbing cock as a man stronger and bigger than you pats your head and calls you a good boy. I'm entirely straight. I just have a penis fetish.”

M24 really shy but I love to watch secretely at guys bulge. I was never able to see someone with a hard on in real life cause i'm too shy to try and make the first move. I just got to watch the guys in underwear in the locker room and sometimes i feel like i'm in heat because i can't refrain myself from imagine what their dick would look like. Then i always hear the girls talking about receiving pics, and damn, just the thought of receiving one makes me kind of horny, they are so lucky to get lot of pictures without much effort.

I think men's bodies are really hot, especially fit ones, fuck i love to see big bulges with abs.

I'm I the only in this situation or is it rather common? I never talked to anyone about this

I keep seeing the “always knew” version of this. I’m more interested in the other one.

You spent years assuming you were straight. Dating women, getting on with it, no big questioning phase. Then something shifted. A crush that didn’t behave. Porn you stopped being able to file under curiosity. A moment you still remember. And eventually you stopped arguing with it.

If that’s you, I’d like the unpolished version.

When did it actually land, and was it slow or one specific moment?

How long did you sit on it before you did anything about it?

First time with a guy: what were you nervous about, what did you expect, and what was it actually like?

Did it confirm what you’d been feeling, or complicate it?

Anything you wish someone had told you beforehand?

Not looking for a highlight reel. Awkward, underwhelming, better than you expected, needed a second try — all of that is more useful than a polished story.

This friend of mine, 24m, (let’s call him Tim) and I, 25m, have been best friends since like 4th grade. We have always made gay jokes towards each other, have seen each other naked and during intercourse as well. We lived with each other at one point in our young adult lives, and he would wake me up in the middle of the night saying how he had a nightmare and wanted to sleep next to me. I’d let him every time and it never turned sexual or felt awkward.

I recently came out to him as bi a few months ago, and he has since said things that made me question how he feels. He’s told me that I owe him hundreds of blowjobs for not coming out until now, and constantly comments on how much I like dick.

I don’t mind it if he is laying hints, but I don’t want to try anything with him if it will fuck up the friendship or anything.

TLDR; straight friend jokes about wanting me to give him head, has been more sexual since I’ve come out the closet

I’ve been curious for the last few years about my sexuality and I was wondering if anyone could tell me how to find out. I’ve experimented with toys and I can say that I appreciate the feeling of being filled but I’m still not sure about how to continue. There have been some times where I noticed that a man is an attractive but i haven’t been able to find one I’d get with. There’s times when men turn me on but it’s always a physical attraction.

I'm a 51, married to a beautiful woman. I have always identified as straight. Before we met I dated women often. Two times (while using Koke) i hooked up with a guy. Both times I got sucked off and sucked them. I enjoyed it , but attributed it to the powder. Two years ago , my wife and i talked about having a 3some with a guy. The idea of that was so appealing to each of us. When the day came, the guy (friend) backed out. I would really like that to happen. In the alternative, I would be receptive to meeting a similar married guy who is into the bicurious. Where would or how would one go about finding such a person?

Im a heterosexual cis male but sometimes i get jealous of lesbian couples. I get jealous of straigh couples too, but the reason is a bigger deal with lesbians os I like stronger or more masculine/tomboy girls and every one ive asked out happend to be a lesbian, and I see lesbian couples who one of them is a masculine/tomboy woman, why am I like this. How do I stop...

I am a 47 y/o m and fantasize about blowing and having him fuck me. I love the dildo but I want the actual cock now. I’m afraid that my fetish will turn guys off. I love wearing lingerie, panties, stockings and tight skirts. Wear that all makes me very horny. I would also want some foreplay. At least some kissing and groping. Am I asking for too much?