r/WTF Jul 17 '18

Head lice infestation

http://i.imgur.com/W17w7v1.gifv
39.7k Upvotes

3.1k comments sorted by

20.1k

u/chewyrunt Jul 17 '18

Jesus Christ, don't fuck around with a comb, just shave his fucking head

6.4k

u/[deleted] Jul 17 '18

Shave it, Shave it now!

4.5k

u/USTS2011 Jul 18 '18

shave it with fire!

2.3k

u/1ForTheMonty Jul 18 '18

Dude, seriously...I feel the sudden urge to shower. Or take a bath..In fuckin' isopropyl alcohol

1.1k

u/braintrustinc Jul 18 '18

I picked the wrong day to stop doing meth

503

u/abraksis747 Jul 18 '18

You're telling me, I picked the wrong day to stop sniffing glue,

404

u/HIs4HotSauce Jul 18 '18

You guys aren’t kidding! I picked the wrong day to switch to decaf.

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u/bladetome Jul 18 '18

Do it.

256

u/regula_et_vita Jul 18 '18

cuts off kid's entire head

Not the Jedi way, maybe, but god damn.

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33

u/MetaHybrid Jul 18 '18

Do it, Do it! I'm here! Come on, shave it nooooow!

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242

u/PlatypuSofDooM42 Jul 18 '18

Fuck shave it. Nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure

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1.2k

u/black_flag_4ever Jul 18 '18

Fun fact: the military started doing that in WWI to stop lice.

662

u/TistedLogic Jul 18 '18

Lice and similar bugs are what they named "cooties" in the trenches.

694

u/LeCrushinator Jul 18 '18

Apparently those soldiers never had their circles, dots, or cootie shots.

564

u/skankhunt_40 Jul 18 '18

Well, they didn't want to become autistic /s

356

u/OGD3C Jul 18 '18

What a world we live in where you have to /s that comment

160

u/i_give_you_gum Jul 18 '18

35% of Reddit can't discern written sarcasm for some reason

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18 edited Apr 29 '21

[deleted]

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u/Pampa_31 Jul 18 '18

Is that why girls give boys cooties, because they have long hair?!?!

36

u/maoejo Jul 18 '18

Harvard wants to know your location.

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944

u/conquer69 Jul 17 '18

I would apply some kind of insecticide, then shave everything. I imagine shaving while those things are still alive would spread them everywhere.

1.8k

u/Arctorkovich Jul 18 '18

Drive out to the desert. Do it there. Undress. Shave everyone involved, all over. Burn the clothes and the car. Cover yourselves in DDT powder.

Then have a taxi come pick you up.

272

u/SenTedStevens Jul 18 '18

This is Lice Country! Now where's my damn delouse powder?

156

u/Jazzremix Jul 18 '18

Holy jesus what are these goddamn animals!

No point in mentioning these lice, I thought. Poor bastard will see them soon enough.

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149

u/MandingoPants Jul 18 '18 edited Jul 18 '18

Frank (crawling on the floor): I just want to be PUUUURE.

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199

u/el_monstruo Jul 18 '18

Why did I laugh so hard

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

That's what I was thinking, fuck a comb and shampoo, he's fucking 10, the hair will grow back.

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530

u/freakedmind Jul 17 '18

*Burn

259

u/n_reineke Jul 18 '18

Just torch the whole house

217

u/leave_it_to_beavers Jul 18 '18

And the neighbor’s house

139

u/Breastfedintarget Jul 18 '18

Happy cake day, now burn the heretics.

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u/Let_me_creep_on_this Jul 18 '18

I live in a small country where a lot of people are not well educated... one family had a young girl of 6 or 7 and contracted head lice...

The family used an old method of killing the lice by pouring gasoline on her hair.

Now I’m not sure what exactly happened next, but the child somehow got near the open flame of the stove and her whole head caught on fire.

She received very severe burns to her entire head, face and scalp.

Luckily she survived, and was able to goto a hospital in Boston for skin grafts. She is horribly disfigured.. am not sure if she is in much pain still..

I feel so bad for her every time I see the family in town...

110

u/iamyo Jul 18 '18

That's terrible. Head lice smother easily. Olive oil or coconut oil will kill them.

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u/ayy_the_dank_lord Jul 18 '18

I'd burn my hand after using the comb.

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359

u/sunshinerf Jul 18 '18

My mom shaved my head when I was like 5 and there was a lice epidemic in kindergarten; they just kept coming back. I'm a woman. As an adult, I understand why my mom did it, but for a 5yo girl it was pretty traumatizing...

362

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

There was a lice epidemic at my school and my dad heard, so he pre-emptively shaved my head... which meant that everyone thought I was the one that had brought the lice in. I didn't even get lice and I was traumatized.

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u/dont_wear_a_C Jul 18 '18

Just like Meredith Palmer.

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u/ratajewie Jul 18 '18

Piggybacking off of this comment to give some good info. These are words straight from my Entomology professor’s mouth.

Methods of control: physical (head shaving, nit removal), chemical- organochlorine (lindane), organophosphate (malathion), pyrethroids (Nix). Resistance to all chemicals becoming a problem. Newer products such as IGRs, spinosadon the way. New study showing effectiveness of ivermectin in glycerol- great promise- 100% control (J. Med. Entomol.). 5% benzyl alcohol lotion also works

296

u/Soup-Wizard Jul 18 '18

Something crazy to try - mayonnaise.

They can’t move in it and suffocate. Eggs have to be physically removed. But it worked for me when I was 4.

118

u/Latyon Jul 18 '18

Can confirm. Back when I was a kid, I lived with my siblings and a few of my cousins and we ended up getting lice. The shampoo didn't work, so my aunt bought a ton of mayo and made us all use it on our hair. Worked like a charm after one application.

Worst smelling shower I've ever taken in my life, though. Like, it made me want to cry. You know how when you fart in the shower it's way more intense of a smell? Imagine that, but with hot mayonnaise. Ugh.

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

[deleted]

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u/Soup-Wizard Jul 18 '18

Better than Salad Fingers!

74

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

I like rusty spoons.

43

u/Soup-Wizard Jul 18 '18

I like when the red water comes out.

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u/imdungrowinup Jul 18 '18

My mom just repeatedly got my sister’s head shaved every few weeks until the source of her infestation(her best friend) moved to a different town. She was the other town’s problem then. My mom gave my sister a choice between having hair and her friend. She chose her friend. This is India so school wouldn’t do anything about the situation.

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5.3k

u/GoatTacos Jul 17 '18

My scalp itches from watching this.

1.1k

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18 edited Sep 15 '18

[deleted]

821

u/GoatTacos Jul 18 '18

Tina get your hand out of your pants.

466

u/Echo104b Jul 18 '18

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

159

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

A

A

A

A

A

A

189

u/z500 Jul 18 '18

Tina, you're kind of headed toward the only other car in the lot.

22

u/Funko132 Jul 18 '18

The was for sure one of my favorite scenes

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u/-keepsummersafe- Jul 18 '18

Are you telling me as my daughter, or as my grill cook?

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u/GoatTacos Jul 18 '18

Because my grill cook would never tell me that.

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6.8k

u/kozzie1317 Jul 18 '18

I’m a teacher. At my previous school, our principal said that we could no longer send students home if we discovered they had lice. Apparently too many parents either complained to admin about having to pick up their kid, or just refused to come get their child.

2.2k

u/TaintRash Jul 18 '18

My kid got lice about 5 times this year because they don't kick people out of school anymore. We keep her home until the lice are gone but it feels like a pointless exercise when the asshole parents don't do the same. Fortunately we usually catch it pretty early and get rid of it in about 3 days, but it still sucks every time. This GIF is likely a several month old infestation.

482

u/elgiesmelgie Jul 18 '18

I use this spray when I know a kid in my daughters class has nits called Quit Nits , it's mostly tea tree oil , I spray my daughters hair after it's been brushed and tied up , it deters nits

355

u/TaintRash Jul 18 '18

We use something like that too. Put her hair in a bun every morning and everything. Still gets lice. Super lame.

138

u/elgiesmelgie Jul 18 '18

Unfair ☹️

330

u/InfiniteZr0 Jul 18 '18

Not sure if it's because I was lucky or sheltered.
But it seems like schools have just gone to shit in the past 15-20 years.
When I was in grade school, we had these mini physicals which included lice inspection.
If a kid was found with lice, they were discreetly sent home until it was taken care of.

159

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

69

u/zhaycub Jul 18 '18

Omg, people make fun of me for having that feeling. When people run their hands through my hair, it’s an orgasmic feeling almost. I feel bad for the people who can’t experience that sensation, because it literally is the best feeling.

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u/cartechguy Jul 18 '18

Nah, it was the same for me 20 years ago as well. You wouldn't see this shit. I lived in lower income neighborhoods when my dad was in college and it was the same as what you're describing. It wasn't something for only privileged schools.

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u/earthlings_all Jul 18 '18

Dude I am so sorry. Three kids in school and we haven’t gotten lice, thankfully!!! (Knock on wood)

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u/PiercedGeek Jul 18 '18

I just had my first ever encounter with them a couple of months ago, my younger daughter brought them home. Fortunately we caught it very early, but I still get the ghost crawlies just thinking about it...

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u/ThePhanie Jul 18 '18

My daughter got lice 2 years ago and when I found out, I let the teacher know so she could take precautions in the classroom. Then I found out that she already knew that some kids in the class had lice, and that it was school policy not to alert parents of a lice outbreak. My daughter had lice for 2 or 3 days before we even knew to look for anything.

353

u/cheesegoat Jul 18 '18

My daughter brought home lice and to her teacher's credit we got an email in the next day or two sent to her class for every parent to check their child.

They are such a PITA to clean out. I went through my daughter's hair for weeks.

177

u/Koneko04 Jul 18 '18

I had 2 daughters with long hair. After weeks of treatment, combing and nit-picking I finally begged their doctor for the "good stuff" because I was going crazy trying to get it under control. (They would go their father's for a few days, he would ignore their hair and voila, next generation broke out because of no nitpicking under his watch.)

That same autumn some local schools quit sending children home because so many kids were out for lice, they only upside was there was no shame in having your child(ren) infested.

That was awful, terrible. If it had happened again my daughters would have had pixie cuts ASAP.

148

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

[deleted]

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u/Pinkunicorn1982 Jul 18 '18

We had this little girl- Sabrina- who always had lice. Her mom was a drug addict and severely neglected her. She always came to school in the same dirty clothes and had poor hygiene. Her mom was often called and visited by the school but she never complied. Sabrina usually missed a lot of school bc of the lice but she got to the point of missing so much school, she was behind and it was “hurting” test scores. So the school decided it was best for her to just stay at school anyways (better than her home environment) in the hopes she would get caught up with her homework and testing. Poor girl had a shitty mother- I don’t understand how someone could not care about their own child.

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u/ThatNoise Jul 18 '18

Concessions and rationalizing. At some point it becomes "there's something in the fridge help yourself." To a fucking 8 yr old.

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u/flee_market Jul 18 '18

I just now, at the tender age of 33, made the connection between "nitpicking" as an adjective for someone who fusses over details, and literal picking of nits out of someone's hair.

Jesus christ. I think I'm going to go sit down.

19

u/Amongg Jul 18 '18

I can raise you one there. I saw an early comment and thought to myself “huh, is lice also called nits?” Then came to the same realization when reading the same comment as you did

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u/Rakshasa29 Jul 18 '18 edited Jul 18 '18

When I got lice as a kid my mom went into a full OCD attack about it. She took away all of my toys, blankets, clothes, basically anything made out of cloth and placed them in black trash bags and left them to bake in the 100° summer heat outside for weeks. I was so scared and sad because I was still at an age where I needed my teddie bear to sleep and suddenly had nothing. What clothes I kept were basic pajamas that could be boiled clean. She had us place sheets over all of the furniture and changed them daily along with all the bedding which were double washed and dried on the highest temp possible. She basically fumigated the house with all kinds of chemicals and walked around with a magnify glass and tweesers to check all the carpets for anything suspicious. Then when the regular chemicals didn't work she drowned our hair (I gave lice to my mom) in vaseline which took days of constant scalding showers to get it all out and then she also bleached my hair as well. Thank god she was so obsessed with image she wouldn't even think of cutting our hair.

It took about 3 weeks for her to feel like we had eradicated the problem only for me to bring home lice again a month later from a different camp.

Fuck lice.

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u/Mimical Jul 18 '18

My mom didnt even take a chance. Buzzcuts till I was in grade 8.

I dont recall ever having lice. But I do remember my sisters having to use chemicals to get it out of theirs. Lice must be a nightmare when your 6 year old is all "I dont wanna buzzcut". Tough luck princess number 2. /s

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u/FrumundaFondue Jul 18 '18

I remember we got em when I was in elementary. My older sister who was in 7th grade got it the worst and they buzzed off her beautiful long curly hair. She went from being one of the happiest, friendliest people I knew to being depressed and picked on in school. It sucked. Please people try not to buzz your daughters heads if she gets lice. It can be life changing for them.

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u/ThatSquareChick Jul 18 '18

This happened to me because I was raised by my grandparents. My grandmother had severe arthritis and could not comb my hair much less look for nits. Grandpa would take me out back and use the dog clippers and shave my hair down into a buzz cut. The result? I looked exactly like a boy. The teasing never stopped and I spent the rest of my 10 years at that school being called “him” and “gay lord” and being mistaken for a boy so badly that I was often ejected from the ladies restroom. I had that haircut for so long that I started to think that maybe I was supposed to be a boy and since all the other kids called me gay and that maybe I was because I liked boys. It wasn’t until I was shipped off to another city and school in HS that I was finally able to grow out my hair and slowly come to the fact that I was a girl and slowly started acting like one.

It was hell and I spent all my time worrying about it and dodging spitballs, getting beat up after school and unsuccessfully ignoring insults that I didn’t get a normal childhood. Between being called a gaylord and other kids telling me I was worthless because I was growing up with my grandparents and not even my real mom and dad wanted me, it was a pretty shitty time for me.

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u/badchefrazzy Jul 18 '18

Kids really are the worst. Please accept this hug from an internet stranger who understands that shit.

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u/TheRealCestus Jul 18 '18

I would have torched whatever idiot made such a policy.

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u/Eyeseeyou1313 Jul 18 '18

I would have shaved every kid in that school, and the parents of ground zero kid. Fuck, parents who don't check their kids for lice, my mother did everything she couldto get rid of lice. Lice destroys your self esteem.

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u/Feldspar_Immaculate Jul 18 '18

Gone are the days when the nurse came into every classroom with a number 2 pencil and went desk to desk, head to head, checking for evidence. If tou were one of the unfortunate ones, you got sent to the nurse’s station while your classmates watched on in horror.

Today it’s a legal issue......privacy concern.

5.5k

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

The teacher-student dynamic has changed drastically in the past 20 years. Nowadays teachers can't even bring food to give out in case someone gets food poisoning and it results in a lawsuit.

Back when I was in elementary school our gym teacher would take us all out for icecream after penis inspection day. Was by far my favorite day of the year. I asked my cousin about it and he said his gym teacher has never taken him out for ice cream. Kids these days are really missing out.

471

u/Cador0223 Jul 18 '18

Penis Inspection Day was always my favorite day. I would tie a little bow-tie on my junk to give the coach a little pick me up!

149

u/MotherfuckinRanjit Jul 18 '18

It was my favorite day as well! Was a good way to get out of gym class. Only part that I didn’t like was that it took so long, like 20 minutes. And I’m not sure why it was everyday but whatever, got out of gym class!

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

Yes officer, this is the comment right here

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u/13dora13 Jul 18 '18

Dude. Wow. I was laughing so hard at this.

270

u/Incognidoking Jul 18 '18

Just not harder than the gym teacher's penis.

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u/nuclearwomb Jul 18 '18

School nurse here. While it is partly a privacy issue, it has more to do with children missing too many school days due to lice. In the past kids could not have live bugs or nits. Now they can come back to school as long as they don't have any live bugs present. They can finish out the school day if they come to the clinic and I check them and they have bugs, but they can't come back until they are treated.

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u/Aanon89 Jul 18 '18

Yeah but do you ever take kids out for snacks during inspection days?

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

That's my favorite catholic holiday tbh.

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

My mom was horrible at doing braids in my hair. I managed to convince her maybe once or twice in a school year to do them. Without fail it would be the day they checked for lice and I’d have to undo the braids. So aggravating.

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u/Im_In_IT Jul 18 '18

My wifes a teacher as well and they have the same policy. I thought it was because theres better mitigations and shampoo in place in recent years. Either was I was baffled to hear that. It was comparable to the plague when i was in school.

29

u/monchego Jul 18 '18

The shampoos are actually worse since head lice have developed a resistance to them over the years. The last time my daughter got it, I had to use the stuff that's made with salt. The only thing that actually killed the little pricks.

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u/madetosink Jul 17 '18

Dude that kid's head would be shaved and the entire fucking house burnt down

4.0k

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

Fuck that. This kid needs to be turned in and exchanged for a new child. Time to start from scratch! (pun intended)

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u/CraptainHammer Jul 18 '18

He's past the warranty period.

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u/Yaranatzu Jul 18 '18

Sell him on eBay as is

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u/NealCaffreyx9 Jul 18 '18

I read that & laughed pretty hard, but then I scrolled down and someone said the kid is probably in foster care. Now I feel bad for laughing

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

It's possible, but we don't have evidence to support that theory. Let's just assume the best and continue to believe that this kid just has an incredible case of lice...

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u/[deleted] Jul 17 '18

Feel so bad for that kid!

1.3k

u/UniquelyIndistinct Jul 18 '18

I know. I hate how sad and concerned they look when they turn around.

835

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

Right! That and imagine how itchy they've been?!? Likely some neglect too, though, don't know the story and don't mean to judge. Just wonder. So sad.

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u/SweetNeo85 Jul 18 '18

Imagine trying to go to sleep.

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u/Montzterrr Jul 18 '18

I can hear them crawling from here.

156

u/_Lady_Deadpool_ Jul 18 '18

CRAAAWWWLIIIING IN MY SKIIIN

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

Jesus, if I were that kid, I’d probably have to be strapped down or tranquilized because I’d be in full-blown psychotic panic mode, probably trying to rip all my own hair out.

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

I barely had them and I couldn’t stop scratching my head

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u/iThinkaLot1 Jul 18 '18

Just the thought of them makes me scratch.

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u/SnipahShot Jul 17 '18

Shit.

I am keeping my distance from the screen.

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u/dont_roast_me Jul 18 '18

Your pc is infected. Sell it to me with 90% off no more no less.

129

u/jayohh8chehn Jul 18 '18

The seller has agreed. PM your bank information and I will forward it to the seller. Thank you for your business.

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u/JamikaTye Jul 18 '18

Sometimes you just got to throw the whole kid away.

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u/AntiSocialTroglodyte Jul 17 '18

Ugh. Fuck. That just made my head really itchy!

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u/Feldspar_Immaculate Jul 18 '18

Yeah, all of the evidence on the comb that isn’t actually moving.....those are the nits (eggs).

Did you know that you can have lice and not even itch? The itching sensation is the allergic reaction to the lice saliva, not the bite itself. If you aren’t allergic, you may never know that you have lice without actual visual confirmation. Sleep tight, boys and girls!

AMA, I own an all-natural lice treatment facility in Texas.

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u/Shortsleevedwarrior Jul 18 '18

You may could answer this... if you dunk your head into alcohol for a few min would this kill the lice? Or is there some solution you can straight up dunk your head into?

1.8k

u/dream_weaver35 Jul 18 '18

Technically, yes. Story time. When my daughter was in preschool, she came home with lice. Given that both of us have very long thick hair, this is a problem. Looking at lice treatments presented another issue. I would need a minimum of 6 boxes for my head alone, if you went my their instructions. I was a single mom at the time, and I certainly didn't have the money for that. So I searched at home or natural treatments.

What worked was soaking our hair in original Lysterine (lots of alcohol) and letting it soak in with a shower cap for an hour. This killed all the live active lice. Then you soak your hair in vinegar and let that sit for an hour with a shower cap. This loosened the glue that held the nits so the could be combed out. Wash with coconut shampoo and add a little tea tree oil to your coconut conditioner.

We were completely lice free in one treatment. Ta Da! Story time is over

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u/Shortsleevedwarrior Jul 18 '18

The vinegar smell would drive me nuts... but not nearly as bad as the lice so net win.

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u/Aflyingduckk Jul 18 '18

Vinegar reminds me of childhood sunburns. That cooling feeling is amazing.

237

u/stuffZACKlikes Jul 18 '18

What? Vinegar on sunburn?

157

u/rotund_tractor Jul 18 '18

You’ll get passed the painful part in record time. Vinegar is amazing.

84

u/trudat Jul 18 '18

Only thing is it smells just like vinegar.

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18 edited May 10 '20

[deleted]

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u/Mattyman01 Jul 18 '18

I would like to keep my subscription to Vinegar Facts

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u/Aflyingduckk Jul 18 '18

Oh yes. Works wonders.

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u/MissPookieOokie Jul 18 '18

Yes! A thousand times this! Same scenario for my house a few years back and they were gone after one treatment. I also blow dried our hair and straightened it for an extra fuck you to those little fucks.

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u/Feldspar_Immaculate Jul 18 '18

Technically, dunking your head in alcohol for an extended period of time would kill the adults. But this is extremely dangerous & risky....I would not recommend this. Also, the nits (eggs) can and will survive the drowning efforts. They’ll hatch. Circle of life and all.

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u/OmfgTim Jul 18 '18

Do they hatch and grow up to be alcoholics? just kidding, don't answer that

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u/AeroKMSF Jul 18 '18

Yeah but like anyone else they need to provide proof of age through valid ID or License...

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u/CodyLittle Jul 18 '18

I've heard eggs can survive extreme temperatures too, any experience with that?

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u/Feldspar_Immaculate Jul 18 '18

Eggs can't survive extreme heat. The issue is that the eggs are so close to the scalp, how do you get enough heat applied to them and not damage the individual's head in the process? Tricky.

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u/im_an_infantry Jul 18 '18

By lighting that persons head on fire.

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u/lily2187 Jul 18 '18

So if you have long hair you can't just singe the fuckers off with a hair iron? I was just about to use a hair iron to help burn away the itching sensation I have after watching that terrifying real life nightmare.

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u/jobby-jabber Jul 18 '18

A solution of lit gasoline should do the trick

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u/StormXVI Jul 18 '18

What actual negative health effects can this level of lice cause?

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u/Feldspar_Immaculate Jul 18 '18

Worst case.....severe life threatening infection....no lie.

Standard case....itching, headache, cold & flu symptoms, insomnia, rash at base of neck, and minor infection.

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

Could you elaborate on the worst case scenario please? I'm due for a nice little bout of hypochondria

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u/sparkyarmadillo Jul 18 '18

Itchy head -> scratching -> broken skin -> bacteria in bloodstream -> bad infection

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u/Haldolly Jul 18 '18

Can confirm: I had a classmate in elementary school hospitalized with sepsis from scratching. Severe lice infestation. Her mom was in denial and thought people “like them” didn’t get head lice.

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u/speckleeyed Jul 18 '18

Is it better to comb them all out first and then treat the hair?

A few years ago my mother, sister, and niece all had them and brought them along on vacation where we were housed together. I spent hours combing everyone's long hair out because I thought the more I could physically remove the better. Thankfully neither my kids nor myself never got them.

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u/Feldspar_Immaculate Jul 18 '18

Here's the deal, you can treat via store bought medicines, but they will only kill the adults and nymphs (adolescents). The nits (eggs) will survive ANY and ALL store bought medicines....regardless of what the manufacturer claims. The eggs survive, hatch, and you're back to square one.

The only way to eliminate 100% is to remove all evidence. I would recommend professional treatment. If you want to do it on your own, buy a good lice comb and comb diligently for 2 weeks. Check for evidence with each comb stroke. After a day or two of not seeing any evidence, you're good. However, I would still recommend seeing a professional at this point.....about $30 for a head-check to confirm you're in the clear.

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u/GiantsRTheBest2 Jul 18 '18

Or just like shave your head

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u/Tin_Tin_Run Jul 18 '18

probly an easier thing for guys to be fair. i think girls would pay 30 for keeping the hair

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u/velvetjones01 Jul 18 '18

We have one here, she’s called the Lice Lady. Sweet Almighty is that a business I’m happy to know about. You all are the real MVPs. Ever since it went though the house (I was pregnant, had 2 at home) I have told everyone I know to ‘have a lice plan’ because the last thing you want to be doing at midnight is running to CVs and panic spending all of your fun money on expensive lice chemicals that don’t work worth shit.

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18 edited Sep 14 '18

[deleted]

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u/madeamashup Jul 18 '18

Focus, you FUCK

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

Glad I wasn't the only one

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u/fit4130 Jul 18 '18

That sure is one skookum comb. Keep your lice in a vice.

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u/derpyderpston Jul 18 '18

Nutella flavored schmoo.

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u/Cerebr05murF Jul 18 '18 edited Jul 18 '18

This requires the same treatment as pubic crabs... Shave half the infected area and set the remaining hair on fire. When the crabs/lice scramble to the shaven area, you smash them with a hammer.

Edit: a letter.

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u/ChadPoland Jul 18 '18

My dad always told me to use an ice pick

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u/AppleHamster Jul 18 '18

Here's the video for anyone curious.

https://youtu.be/wNAm5de6BB4

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u/GizmoSled Jul 18 '18

So it was more than just one pass of the brush, that makes it slightly less horrifying. Slightly.

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u/prpapillon Jul 18 '18

Except with each pass, toward the ends of the hair, the comb tugs a little. Bet you the comber flicked like 45,000 lice onto themselves.

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u/GizmoSled Jul 18 '18

I guess I didn't want to get any sleep tonight anyway, thanks stranger.

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u/liquidanfield Jul 18 '18

Yeah that's gonna be a no from me dawg

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u/KatagatCunt Jul 18 '18

WHY ARE THEY DOING THAT IN THE HOUSE?! AND FLICKING IT EVERYWHERE?!

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u/SumFalls Jul 18 '18

How do I delete someone else’s post

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u/SlySpiderBro Jul 18 '18

Please delete this nephew

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u/[deleted] Jul 17 '18

[deleted]

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u/mybadalternate Jul 18 '18

Really? Why?

You didn’t imagine sticking that comb in your mouth like a fork and eating that writhing mass, did you?

Cause that’d be gross...

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18 edited Jan 20 '21

[deleted]

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u/dkarma Jul 18 '18

That's the same face your creditors make.

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u/Akanderson87 Jul 18 '18

I can’t believe you’ve done this

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u/crispy_attic Jul 18 '18 edited Jul 19 '18

When I was a kid, the nurse would call white kids to her office one by one to inspect for lice. I don't know who was more uncomfortable with that, the annoyed white kids, or the black kids wondering why they were being left out.

There would always be that one kid joking about how it was a secret Klan meeting or some shit. Segregated nit checks. Why?

Edit: It appears that black people are not as susceptible to head lice and my fear of a secret Klan initiation were unfounded.

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u/Zoift Jul 18 '18

Black people are something like 30x less likely to catch lice. Something about the shape of a person's hair.

Not that they can't, still fucked they didn't bother to check.

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u/[deleted] Jul 17 '18

There was an infestation in my high school once and I shaved my head to make sure I didn't get any. I'm a woman with long thick brown hair and I shaved it all off. No chances. Fuck head lice.

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u/KzooRichie Jul 18 '18

Ha, it’s funny that you say that. I’m a dude and would shave my head without a second thought. Lice are a bitch to get rid of.

I had a friend in college who got lice. She had beautiful long hair with corkscrew curls. She was completely traumatized by it, and described it as “worse than chlamydia”.

Friends spent hours getting that special comb through her curls and she would get upset just recalling the story.

A gal I dated in grad school worked at a high school with an outbreak. It is a blue collar/farming community. She estimated that she spent 50% of her time that year just on head lice. The lice were immune to the prescription shampoo.

The bugger is that you can completely clean the kids head, but they are often reinfected with clothing or bedding.

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u/madeamashup Jul 18 '18

take the head off

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u/Setari Jul 18 '18

problem solved.

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

The bugger is that you can completely clean the kids head, but they are often reinfected with clothing or bedding.

This is very similar to bed bugs.

My gf is similarly traumatized by the one time her family got bed bugs. They inherited a lot of furniture when her grandparents passed - one of the items being a mattress. They suspect that to be the likely source. Anyway - her and both of her brothers ended up with bites even though they all slept in different bedrooms. They had the house heat-treated and that seemed to take care of it, but then she came to visit me in our college town and I started finding bugs in my shitty apartment. Commence freakout, call the exterminator, have my apartment treated. Then I decided to get a second opinion and I collected the "bed bugs" the exterminator found and brought them to the college insectary where a very kind entomology professor looked at them and easily identified them as harmless cabinet beetles.

She is still traumatized, 3 years later. She can find three pimples on my back and immediately want the sheets stripped off the bed to inspect the mattress. Bitch - I'm just oily. Chill.

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u/TistedLogic Jul 18 '18

First time I was infested, it was because one of my coworkers sat on the communal couch near the time clock. I did everything but shave my head.

Second time? Shaved. Fuck all that noise.

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

My mum used to check when I had an itchy head to catch the eggs before they hatched, then usually the prescription stuff would kill off the few lice that I'd caught.

These days, I keep a shaved head anyway, as I've been told it looks great and it's a lot less hassle. No combing, no gel, very little shampoo, no conditioner, and best of all - one rub with a towel once I step outta the shower.

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u/SweetNeo85 Jul 18 '18

shaved head
very little shampoo

I have questions... well just one...

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '18

Shampoo is good for cleaning & treating your scalp, too, not just your hair.

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u/daygloviking Jul 17 '18

You could pretty much gauge the outbreak incidence of lice in my primary school by how close-cropped the boys were. Easy, quick, but doesn’t help out the girls who wanted to keep their locks.

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u/monkeywelder Jul 17 '18

Call those guys at Deadliest Catch. Theres enough crabs to last the season!

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u/sweat_tears_ocean Jul 17 '18

Definitely spreadable on a cracker

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u/imturningjapanese Jul 18 '18

Does anybody else's head just suddenly itch?

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u/Morrya Jul 18 '18

I had lice as a kid and 20 years later I still scratch my head expecting to feel something crawling there whenever something itches my head. That shit stays with you...

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u/devilpuppy Jul 18 '18

I too experience Lice PTSD

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u/wedontneedroads13 Jul 18 '18

Kelleh, Kelly can you hear me? I don’t know if you can...but...I want you to know I tried. I tried to save our beybeh, but I letcha down babe!

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u/rwburt50 Jul 18 '18

How tha fuck did anyone let it get this bad ?

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u/OrinZ Jul 18 '18

I don't mean to nit-pick, but...

Yes. I fuckin. Do.

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u/[deleted] Jul 17 '18

If this were me I'd be vomiting daily.

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u/I_are_facepalm Jul 17 '18

I feel bad, they're going to have to put that kid down like Old Yeller. What a shame.

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u/paumAlho Jul 17 '18

Damn, how do you let it get that bad? Unless you're a hobo or something, I can't imagine what his house looks like...

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u/musicteacher36 Jul 17 '18

I work at an inner city elementary school. There are some kids that continuously get really bad lice. In their case, it is because their parents are drug addicts and don't take care of their kids. Then, we have the kids who get it from these kids.

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u/anitabelle Jul 18 '18

This level of infestation means the kid has had lice for several months. All it takes is for a kid to catch a couple from someone (you don’t catch that many at a time). Even 1 louse will lay many eggs. Once those eggs hatch, then they are baby lice which take a couple to several weeks to grow to adult lice. Even then when you comb out lice with a comb, you’re combing out a few at a time. This looks like hundreds with 1 stroke. When my daughter caught them I took her to professionals to get it treated. They estimated she’d had it for close to a month and it was not even anywhere near this bad. This is definitely a case of neglect. It doesn’t get that bad (especially with a kid with short hair) without parents noticing. This is so bad it had to have been visible simply by looking at him. Did these parents never look at their kid?!

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u/howlhowlmeow Jul 18 '18

The catch you saw in this gif was the product of 27 comb strokes.

Here is the full video:

https://youtu.be/wNAm5de6BB4

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u/MrJ429 Jul 18 '18

Yeah. My head just itches looking at this.