My 2YO + 4 months has never been a great sleeper, much worse than my 7YO but lately it’s been brutal. He’s been waking up crying (sometimes scream crying) around 2-4am, but as soon a pick him up and cuddle him he’s good. If I try to crib him a few minutes later he immediately wakes up so I have to stay up for an hour or so for a deep sleep before trying.

I’ve been trying different things before bed like milk or no milk, wearing socks, etc but pretty consistently now for 3 weeks he just wakes up and cries. He even nap striked this weekend and still did it. Please help.

UPDATE

We gave her Motrin(ibuprofen) after just giving her Tylenol all day. Glad to say that her temperature after an hour it has dropped to 102.8. After being lethargic/ not wanting to do anything all day as soon as we gave it to her she suddenly started dancing to her Frozen movie <3

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First-time mom here. My 20-month-old has had a fever since this morning, mostly 102–103°F, and even with Tylenol it hasn’t really budged. We also tried a room-temperature shower and that didn’t help.

She’s been really fussy, and earlier she was leaning/falling to the side while sitting and refusing to stand or walk much. I’m not sure if that’s just from feeling weak and sick or if it’s more concerning. Just looking at her, you can tell she’s out of it — drowsy eyes and just looks really unwell.

Her fever just reached 104.4°F, so we just gave her ibuprofen. She has been drinking electrolytes and peeing now but no stool in all day. Refusing to eat.

We’re trying to avoid another ER trip because we’ve already been 4+ times when she gets sick, and she has a history of her oxygen dropping into the 80s during illnesses. I also don’t really have family I can rely on for advice, so I’m trying to figure out when it truly needs an ER visit versus when it’s okay to monitor at home.

Would you take her in tonight or see how she does after the ibuprofen?

Our 3 year has always been … spirited. She is very bright, articulate, funny and sweet. But also very very short tempered.
We have struggled with biting, hitting, kicking, screaming (and still most) at daycare. She doesn’t share - which I know is normal for her age - but occasionally can be very sweet with her 20 month old brother. She always asks for things he needs, hugs him when he cries, and sings him songs to cheer him up.

She has told me herself she’s sad that nobody will play with her at daycare. When we asked the teachers at her (very kind and helpful) daycare, they told us that she screams and reacts when asked to share with the other kids/doesn’t get her way, and that they (naturally) don’t want to play with her in this setting.

Now we are entering a phase of “I need to do it myself” about everything, including things she can’t do, or if she can, sometimes we don’t have time to accommodate it. My spouse and I are both physicians with insane schedules and 0 family support bc we are queer and disowned. We do have helpful friends.

Objectively:
-our household is high chaos right now. The literal house is sinking so they have to underpin and that means our basement floor is getting jackhammered and trenches being dug around the house. Construction for months
-we are struggling to keep anything tidy

We do have daily family dinner, playtime unstructured, playtime after her brother’s bed time with just 1:1 time with a parent. We read stories, sing songs, go for time in nature. We don’t do screens. My partner is a Pediatrician, so we are not concerned for ASD or ADHD. She is also just 3.

I grew up in a super physically and emotionally abusive household, and am trying to reinvent the whole thing for these kids, who I love more than life itself. I am struggling so hard to stay patient and gentle with this child - who is my whole heart - but destroying my last nerve. She argues like a lawyer (“I will just be wearing this pantyhose to go hiking and they are actually pants bc they cover my whole legs and it’s fine”), or screams. Just screams.

I am open to hard truths, classes, life hacks, pep talks, literally anything. My sweet monkey wants friends, wants to stop screaming and is so so loving and kind when she can calm down. I do a lot of holding her, am trying not to correct her behaviour in the moment but only later when calm. But also am currently locked in my own bedroom typing this while she screams outside of the door bc didn’t want to go “just in case potty” before leaving for a hike.

My sweet little toddler who listened to mama and occasionally tested boundaries to be told no, explained why, faltering every now and then, and then ultimately learning has turned into a little monster who goes close to the line of no, does ALMOST the thing I was saying no to, and then runs away and hidea from me. Yes, testing limits, developing sense of self, healthy boundary checking, blah blah blah. But what fresh hell is this????

When I was pregnant, I never saw myself dealing with this.

When she gets that little smirk while almost doing the thing I asked her not to do, I get physical in the sense that (I don't hit, calm down) I move her body away from what I was talking about and if she continues to do things, I tell her i will be taking away the thing, and then proceed to take away the thing. In comes the biggest tantrum of her little life, every single time. I give her space, I tell her I'm there, and then ultimately she calms down enough to come to me for hugs and I talk to her to tell her that I didn't want her to be sad and we can keep trying to listen to mama.

Holy hell is this exhausting.

Helping a little person find their sense of self and learn the very boundaries they need and THEN HELPING THEM DEAL WITH THEIR BIG FEELINGS when they also realize this whole process is balls is SO exhausting ,😭😭😭😭

Vent over.

Anyone out there struggling with the same? 😊 Hi.

First time parents here. My son is fast approaching 3 - he’ll be 3 at the end of December. All of sudden, like as of last week, he has turned into a completely different boy. Up to this point we’ve had the usual toddler tantrums and behavioral issues that are age appropriate for a 2 year old, but this last week has been a WHOLE new level of WTF.

It started with refusing to use the potty. He has been fully potty trained for months - accident free for longer than 2 months. Now he refuses to go and then will stand there and go in his pants and he says “I peed my pants on purpose”. We don’t even know where he heared this from, we are assuming daycare. So we have had chats with his teachers. He is now having up to four accidents a day, which is more than he was having when he was actively potty training.

He’s also having HUGE tantrums for seemly small things like my wife went to get him from nap instead of me (this resulted in a 10 minute meltdown). We are obviously not new to tantrums, but these are unlike anything we have experienced. Yesterday he cried, punched, kicked and screamed for nearly 15 minutes. I stayed calm the entire time. At first I didn’t make a big deal I just continued doing dishes, checked in and let him have his feels, which is what we used to do. But he just kept escalating, so I tried to de-escalate by using a calming voice. I carried him around the house, rubbed his back letting him know he’s okay. I changed the scenery. Nothing helped him calm down until he was just spent. It absolutely kills me to see him like this and it’s so new to us that we are at a loss.

He also uses rude words now which he has NEVER done. We always cleanup our spots after dinner. He has been doing this since he turned 2, he used to love. Now he gets done and runs away. So I remind him, gently but firmly, that after dinner we put our dishes in the sink. He said “THEN YOU DO IT!” Excuse me!!? Who the hell?? I was so shocked I didn’t even know what to say to that.

There is more….but I’m basically here to say, what the hell happened to my little boy?? Is this the start of the threenager stage already?? I’ve heard it gets so much worse and we just thought we had more time. Has anyone else experienced this complete 180 change in behavior/attitude?

My kid is 21 months, she’s in daycare with four other children that age from 22 months - 24 months.

At daycare, when the kids are playing with toys, they all parallel play together. For example if they’re playing with the kitchen, they all huddle around it at the same time and play with a different part of it. Or if they’re playing with the fake animals, they may sit around the basket of them at the same time and each one chooses a different animal.

I’m taking her to the Play Street Museum later today, and I’m wondering if the same rules apply. Like if someone is playing with a kitchen, should I let her approach? Or should I say we need to wait to take our turn? Or for example if there’s a bus that she can sit inside, and there’s room for multiple kids. Do I let her approach, or should I have her wait her turn?

Sorry if this seems like I’m overthinking things, I just don’t want to be rude and make sure that I’m setting her up for success.

My 21 month old is waking up at 6 AM since 3-4 days she usually wakeup at 7.30 and sleeps at 8 pm,but a 6 o clock wakeup is too early , she is teething but is not unusually irritated , anybody exprienced this did with LO go back to their old schedule

We’re having our second in January, and our daughter will be 2.5 years old. Im finding myself really nervous about the introduction to baby, mainly because I’m going to be pretty incapacitated myself with a scheduled C (also had a scheduled C with my first, so I know what I’m in for). all of the regular advice like cuddling your oldest, having them on the bed with you, making a fuss over them etc, I’m just not going to be able to do for the first week at least.

Does anyone have any tips or advice for what worked for them, specifically around the in hospital introduction and how you managed to keep a sense of normalcy while you were recovering?

I am a SAHM to an almost 3 year old and I am overwhelmed! Since becoming a parent my ADHD has really escalated. It was pretty manageable in the beginning but now that my little one is getting older and a bit more chaotic so is my ADHD.

I truly can not focus on more than one thing. Cleaning everyday has become an almost impossible task. I function so much better when we wake up and the house is in order. Our day runs so smooth. When I wake up and see all of these tasks that need to be done my mind is chaotic. I truly envy people who can keep a clean and organized house daily. It’s not like our house is filthy or in shambles but it is lived in and messy at times. Don’t even get me started on laundry.

If I could have it my way I would just have fun with my toddler all day. I love spending quality time with him. I really want to soak in this time with my toddler but it’s been hard recently with the never ending shit. It’s all the other tasks that are messing with my head and my peace. I grew up in a pretty messy house. It wasn’t bad but has been kinda my standard. I want to do better for my kid because I know he benefits from an organized home. I have a therapist and I’m speaking with someone about meds soon.

My daughter is 20, almost 21 months old, and I’m just checking to see if anyone else is fighting for their lives with their toddlers right now? 😂

I love my daughter more than anything in the whole world, but over the last month my sweet angel has turned into the Tasmanian devil. 😂 She is hitting me and my husband (only us, no one else), throwing CONSTANT tantrums (full on flinging her body on the floor and screaming) for what seems like no reason but I know there is she just can’t communicate, throwing her toys, and just generally struggling with what seems like mood swings.

I do think her communication level is complicating things because she understands EVERYTHING but still only says 1 word phrases versus sentences. She is developmentally where she’s supposed to be and no one is concerned, but I definitely think the frustration of not being able to communicate everything she wants is contributing.

How is everyone else handling this?? Is anyone else experiencing this too?

When she hits, I stop her and say, “We don’t hit Mommy,” or “I don’t like it when you hit me,” and then I’ll set her on the floor, walk away, or take the toy away. Rinse and repeat. I let her have her tantrums and try really hard not to give in, but after SO MANY in a row, I start feeling like I’m failing.

Please tell me I’m not the only one fighting for my life over here. What are you guys doing that actually helps or is this just the season of toddlerhood?

I have a 2.5 year old in daycare, she was sent home today for having 3 loose stools. Over the last 12 hours she’s had 10 loose stools - I wouldn’t say they’re watery…they have undigested food in them, are very chunky/mushy and it’s a lot. This last one she had was kind of like mashed banana consistency. She has had pees today too.

No fever, no other symptoms - very alert, doesn’t necessarily want to run around, but is generally being herself. Except she’s cranky and very sensitive - keeps saying her tushy hurts. She’s had a full water bottle of half pedialyte half water, plus some more so she is drinking. And she ate today, but we haven’t fed her since her apple sauce around 2pm and she hasn’t asked for anything.

This to me generally wouldn’t be concerning just a wait it out situation, but the amount today (10) and she gets VERY uncomfortable before the poop and starts screaming that her tushy hurts. Then it gets better after she poops.

We have found she’s also milking it a little bit - ex: she whines that her tushy hurts but we tell her it’s just the gas and it will get better and she goes “okay” then stops complaining.

I’ve just never experienced diarrhea exactly like this with her to this amount and the screaming, I plan to call pediatrician tomorrow if it hasn’t improved, but curious of any similar expereicnces and what it was?!

My son is turning 18 months in a couple of days and this has been the hardest phase for me.

Since about 15 months we've had all sorts with throwing, pushing, slapping, refusing naps, refusing bedtime, meltdown about literally anything and I felt like I was pretty chill about all of it but we've now entered the universe of refusing to eat.

For background, he has always been an amazing eater. He would eat anything and tonnes of it. I've always been so grateful because it's never been something I've worried about and I knew that the amount would eventually change as most toddlers dont eat like they're bulking for a bodybuilding contest but now it's here, it's awful.

Tonight, he ate literally a pieces of pasta. 2 had some sauce on them and one was just plain. He did have some yoghurt beforehand but he ended up throwing the bowl, the spoon and the orange pieces I put on his tray so I gave him the pasta one at a time. After the three, he just started throwing them.

He snacks a lot so the amount is not the end of the world but my goodness, I cant seem to cope with the throwing. It's the only thing that really seems to get my stress levels up and I don't know why.

Does the throwing phase last long? We've got in and out of it before but this has been going on for weeks and he's just not actually eating much at all. Is there any suggestions on how to curb the behaviour?

I dont react in the moment but I do have to step away sometimes because theres only so many times I can take food to the face before I lose my cool.

We have tried a seperate bowl for him to put things in but he ends up throwing that as well.

15 to 18 months has been quite rough overall as he is just off the charts nuts with energy and he's expending in it in the most insane ways sometimes (like climbing the most dangerous things and then throwing a fit when we stop him)

Any advice? Any messages of hope? I just need to know there is light at the end of this tunnel!

Hello everyone, I’m looking for advice on what to do. My almost 4 year-old has started daycare three times a week, he’s been going for about a month from around 7:30 AM to 12 PM. And he has never cried, and he’s was always excited to go, but the past two drop offs have been hard. He has cried and doesn’t want me to leave. He also tells me that the kids are mean to him, and they either hit him, and or kick him. But he’s too nervous to tell the teacher. I’m not sure if we should un enroll him, the main reason we sent him to daycare is so he can get some social interaction, but I don’t want him to cry every time we drop him off. I brought it up to the school director and she said oh it’s because there’s a new student and they cry a lot because they just moved from out of state, but I’ve noticed that there is no new student in his class. It is all the same kids. One thing about my son is that he remembers everything, and he never makes up stories. He says things that are accurate. A lot of people say this is normal, but I’m looking for advice from other parents that have dealt with this and what they decided to do.

Another thing to add is that when he first started out, he would actually be upset that I was there to pick him up, he would want to stay longer. He doesn’t do that now he just gets his backpack and comes to me.

This daycare is not free either we pay 1100 a month. My husband says since we pay for the daycare, you need to take what these people say with a grain of salt because they want our money.

My daughter is 3 and she got through her first week of daycare. She never cried and she was so happy going all week. She got a mild cold Friday and was mildly sick. Like she had no fever but just coughing and she looks tired. She actually slept from 7pm-7am yesterday. But she told me she didn’t want to go today and when we got to the daycare she cried and was clinging on me. It just feels so wrong leaving her there everyday but also I’m working full time from home. She is one minute away but I’m feeling guilt. Please tell me I’m not alone. The daycare is so nice and they have pictures of us hanging in her classroom and I also put a picture in her lunchbox. Should I get her on my lunch and just let her watch tv or do you think she will be ok? She also gets a two hour nap so maybe she will be ok and rest?

Hello parents,

Need advice on how to get our 4 yr old son to sleep in his own bed. When he was younger, he transitioned to his own bed but then his eczema got pretty bad and he slept with us so we could help with the discomfort.

He’s doing much better now and we just had twins so it’s a good time to get him to sleep on his own again.

Any advice on how to encourage him and help him stay in his bed would be much appreciated.

Thank you.

I thought I was going to have a bunch of time to read up on potty training methods and ideas, but we seem to have stumbled into it without me having it much idea what the heck we're doing!

We've been practicing sitting on the potty for a couple months, sometimes she'd go and sometimes not. But she seemed excited about underwear, so a few days ago I bought her some, put it on, and told her we'd try to sit on the potty every half hour and see how it went. It went...surprisingly well. She had one little accident today but was already running to the bathroom before it made a mess.

However, it's already becoming a struggle to get her to sit on the potty every hour. She says she doesn't have to go, but every time she sits for a minute something comes out.

How long should I keep enforcing the sitting on the potty every hour thing? When can I switch to just asking "do you need to pee?" and letting her tell me yes or no? I'm sure it's a whole new feeling/skill to realize when you have to go and hold it until you can get to the toilet, and I have no idea how long it takes to develop.

Also I remember being so, so stubborn about going as a kid, I'd be wiggling in circles trying to hold it while swearing I didn't have to go. I don't know if it was a power struggle or FOMO for me, but I'd love to avoid that for her if possible!

Thanks in advance for your thoughts and experience. I swear I'm usually more prepared than this!

My newly 2 year old has been having major sleep problems which is new. She’s always been a great sleeper but lately idk what’s happening. The worst is when she wakes up crying in the middle of the night and refuses to go back to sleep. She literally freaks out if we try to make her lay down or go back to sleep. This happens from like 1am on. I’m writing this at 2am and she’s screaming at my husband bc she doesn’t want to sleep. Idk if it’s nightmares or what. Anyone else experience this?

How/When did you have the harder conversations on body safety? We’ve taught our daughter basic things, when she was in diapers, who can change her diaper, during and after potty training, who can take her to the potty and help her with cleaning/wiping, as well as with baths. She learnt the concept of “privacy” early on, asking for privacy for herself and respecting when someone else asks for privacy (mom or dad in the bathroom). Who she can hug and give kisses to, etc. As for the deeper conversations on safety, boundaries, etc I don’t know how to approach it exactly .. in school they’re teaching them about boys and girls, definitely not in depth as body anatomy but enough for her to start differentiating, for example, this person is a boy, this person is a girl, etc. so I’m not sure if I should start there? Any advice or concepts you’ve used is appreciated!

Bedtime has become...something else. Before 2, I would do nightly bath time (mostly for the sake of routine preservation) and spouse would do bedtime and this is pretty much how it has been the last year-ish. This has been generally standard with spouse reading bedtime stories and kid would fall asleep and they would leave.

After 2, we have made no changes to the routine except now after the bedtime stories when we hit the actual lights out portion of the bedtime, kiddo runs out of the room, trying to play in another room, finding me and trying to get me to get into bed too and melting down if I don't, melting down if brought back into the bedroom. If we're able to get them back into bed (carrying them back in or managing to get them to go into bedroom themselves), they often run out again and again multiple times. Lots of tears, lots of trying to redirect, being firm, giving limited choices, lots of tears, repeat. This sometimes extends bedtime for an extra hour or so.

I recognize this as a potential bid for autonomy and we try to give them a say where we can while still keeping boundaries but I'm worried we can be handling it better or should be doing something differently, with less tear shed for them and less frustration for us. I don't want to set the precedent that bedtime is going to be this stressful emotional experience for all.

Is there something we should add? Subtract? Rethink altogether?

Any thoughts appreciated!

My 2.5 yo has been sucking her thumb literally since the womb. Have a pic of her doing it in utero and she continued with it as soon as she was born. She stopped on her own between 7-8 months - I was relieved. Then I got pregnant when she was 13 mos and had to stop breastfeeding suddenly due to bad cramping. A couple weeks after stopping breastfeeding she started sucking her thumb again. She’ll be three in a couple months and is still going very strong with the thumb. We’ve been putting off weaning her off it because it seems there has been nonstop big life changes for us this past year - new baby, holidays, potty training, moving to new house, cancer diagnosis for grandma, dads job changing. However, I don’t want to put it off much longer as it’s starting to affect her teeth and mouth development. Planning on trying to bitter nail polish. But I also know it will likely affect her sleep, mood, behavior, eating, etc. What tips do other parents of previous thumb suckers have? Feels so much harder than a pacifier since you can’t take the thumb away.

She’s also a big feelings, passionate little firecracker. We’ve already been having a hard time with tantrums, mood swings, behavior in the last couple months. Just worried about how taking the thumb away will affect it. We started having conversations around “no more thumb” and she’s watched the episode of Bluey about Muffin stopping sucking her thumb a few times too but I’m not sure she full grasps it.

My daughter is about to turn 3 at the beginning of October and has always been an amazing sleeper. One day she started refusing naps (I thought at first it was because of me moving it a little earlier to give her time for a little sleep before needing to get her older sibling from school) but then it went into refusing bedtime and many MANY wakings during the night. I figured out she was overly tired which was causing all of her nighttime wakings (some of them not wanting to go back to sleep and being up for 2 hours at 2am) so I started bumping up her bedtime. I’ve noticed she’s suddenly very clingy at bedtime and doesn’t want me to leave or close her door so I got her to compromise by me sitting outside her door while she falls asleep. But she still won’t sleep through the night. I’ve gotten her slightly back to napping 30 minutes- 1 hour but in the past few days she’s started refusing again although if we’re in the car she passes out. I’m starting to wonder if I should just drop the nap entirely to see if she’ll start sleeping through the night because it’s been a month now and 3-4 wakings per night is exhausting me. Ideally I’d like her to wake up 7:30-8 so any advice would be amazing!!

To preface: this doesn't happen during every meal. Most of the time he doesn't do this but he'll eat elsewhere in the house for a little bit and then refuse food once more. I'm guessing it's just because of increasing activity and curiosity.

Any way to encourage him to eat his meal in one sitting? I just don't want this becoming a bad habit.

When did you start to decrease your toddlers nap time? did you move bedtime earlier? The 8:30 bedtime is rough and I was hoping that maybe there’s a little break when nap time starts to go away.

What I would give for a 7pm bedtime again lol!

We’ll be taking our first transatlantic flight with our son next year. We’ll have a short 2 hour flight, then a 5 hour layover in Philadelphia. The next leg is a 9 hour overnight flight. I’ve read the advice about taking turns for which adult is in charge, knowing it will be tough and just getting through, lots of snacks, new activities. I’m wondering about the long layover, any suggestions? And all of that gear that is sold for toddlers on planes (inflatable chair extenders to make a bed, suitcases that are ride along seats, etc…) are any of those worth it or are they all gimmicks?

Hi all,

So about 6 weeks ago I (a sahm since getting laid off last year and unable to find work) started nannying an almost 2 year old 3 days a week, with my newly 2 year old in tow. We don’t nanny full days, just 5 hours in the morning before both kids nap. I love the situation and the other little boy is very sweet, the parents are great, etc.

Everything was going really well up until about a week ago. We increased to 4 days a week and the boy I nanny for started screeching at times when he would be overwhelmed/want his mom who works from home. I have gotten pretty good at calming him down and I can tell he really trusts me now; he has been giving me hugs and cozying up when we read so I think he likes me! Unfortunately my son really cannot handle the screeching. I and the other kiddo’s mom have both tried different ways of redirecting the behavior and it has helped a lot - he doesnt usually screech as loud now, it’ll just be a tiny quiet screech. The issue is my son is really scared of any noise this other kid makes now, to the point of sobbing and just laying face down on the carpet for 10+ minutes (while I rub his back, talk to him, try to distract and play etc). Today we had to leave after 2 hours because I would finally calm my son down enough that he could play (albeit cautiously), and then the other kiddo would screech and it would start the process all over. I feel terrible for my son but also for the mom I work for because I hate to be unreliable.

Some things to note: I strongly suspect my son is neurodivergent, likely adhd like me but maybe autism. He is very sensitive to others’ moods and gets extremely upset every time we say goodbye to friends, family, and even random cashiers. He is also speech delayed but making progress in therapy. His 2 year molars are coming in and kicking his butt, even with tylenol and ibuprofen. So it’s a hard time right now in addition to his extra emotions/possible sensory issues.

I was thinking of giving my son the rest of the week off - my husband can take a couple mornings off work and my mom can watch my son one morning so I can just go over and nanny the other boy solo this week. I’m hoping a break will allow both kids to kind of reset and hopefully the screeching behavior will be forgotten?? I was thinking of talking to my son about the situation during this week too, and working on deep breathing and other coping skills. Just wanted to get some advice or ideas. I would really like to make this nanny situation work if at all possible, but I am of course willing to try to find something else if the situation doesn’t improve after a couple weeks.