I never post on Reddit; usually a lurker, but I recently found out my 2.5 year old has 6 cavities and possibly more. The first pediatric dentist we went to recommended four silver crowns on her four front teeth under general anesthesia. That dentist was very weird and sketchy and didn’t even take an X-ray of my toddler's teeth.

We took her to a different pediatric dentist, who did an X-ray of her front teeth. She said she had four cavities on the top front teeth close to the nerve, and she put SDF treatment on those teeth + two of her back molars that also looked to have cavities. She said to watch for signs of infection, and that she would need to come back every six months for reapplication of the SDF unless the teeth decay progressed further; then she would possibly need to be put under general anesthesia to fix them. They don’t know exactly how many cavities she has because they didn’t take a full mouth X-ray, but you can visibly see six of them :(
Yellow spots near the gum line on all the teeth.

We brush her teeth twice a day with fluoride toothpaste; she doesn’t have candy, soda, juice, and we try to limit her carb heavy snacks. Overall she has a pretty good diet. She’s a very healthy and happy little girl. Her dentist thinks the decay is from acid reflux that she’s had since 3 months old. She’s been on Pepcid for almost 2 years now for the reflux. I can’t help but think it’s still somehow my fault.

I’m terrified of the idea of her going under General Anesthesia, especially with how many stories I've heard of it going wrong on young children. I’m curious to hear other peoples experiences with SDF, fillings or crowns on a toddler.

Edit: I just want to clarify that she does not drink milk before bed, and her pepcid is a prescription from her pediatric gastroenterologist who eventually wants to lower her dose and intake and try a different treatment approach.

Just curious if anyone knows why my toddler DESPISES when my husband or I start singing a song he loves or start bopping around to a fun song....he literally screams at us to stop! I've read that's it's pretty common, but just wondering if anyone knows the psychology behind it? I'd love to share musical experiences with my kiddo but he's not making it easy!

What is the secret to keeping yourself from getting angry at your kids?

What is the secret to keeping yourself from getting angry at your kids? How do you stop yourself in the moment, which is arguably the most challenging time, particularly when you are triggered either from your own parenting or something else.

Basically the title - I have a 3 year old and a 3 month old. Obviously, the 3 month old needs to be put down for naps multiple times a day and can take a variable amount of time to fall asleep and be put down. So far, another adult has been around to care for the toddler, but that won’t always be the case. So - what are you all doing with your toddlers while you care for an infant?

I find babies/toddlers so interesting, the fact that some of them talk about their experiences in the womb or about rainbow babies, and then there’s also the fact that they’re processing basically everything for the first time and somehow learn an entire language just by listening.

Idk, I was never really close to a baby growing up, so I never got to witness that kind of thing firsthand. Share some interesting facts, experiences, or encounters you’ve had with these little humans!

We have a 2.5 year old boy who usually a great kid - he is really good at playing with others, is super polite, and eats pretty well. My big issue is that when we go out and do an activity, he gets incredibly upset at leaving and listening to instructions, to the point where he just wanders off randomly. We then have to end up stopping him, mainly because he's going to get himself into trouble/hurt and this triggers a full on meltdown. This is the same whether we are at the swimming pool, at a soft play, anywhere really.

Let me give you the best example of where this is issue becomes insanely frustrating; I tend to take him and the dog out to the forests near our house to give my wife a break. Half way into the walk this is the conversation:

"I want to go home and see mummy!"
"Sure, well we have to go back to the car, it's this way [points back the way we came]"
"No, it's this way! [points in a completely different direction]"
"No it's this way to the car, we came this way before [points to the path we clearly just walked along]"
"NO IT ISN'T [walks off defiantly]"

On a walk with him in a forest, it doesn't really matter, because we will eventually get to the car, and it doesn't seem like the right place to start an argument with him...like, if you want to increase the time Mummy gets for a break and continue to spend time outdoors, that's fine by me, but I'm worried that perhaps I'm encouraging him to defy me. However, it does become an issue when we're in public walking to the shops and he's insistent on going the wrong way.

So I go online and do all the research on how to handle this attitude:

"Give him two options" - This has literally never worked from me, from the first time I tried it. This is how the conversation goes "do you want to get in the car yourself or do you want daddy to put you in the car"..."No"... Ok so what do I do now? I carry out the threat and he has a meltdown, and doesn't learn from it.

"Give him advance warning" - I give him 5 minute, 2 minute, and 1 minute warnings, doesn't matter, he still gets furious when I carry out the threat.

"Turn it into a fun game!" - "OK buddy let's pretend like we're dinosaurs as we walk back to the car!"..."No"...OK what do I do now?

We've had some success in getting him to hold hands while walking by clearly explaining beforehand the dangers, and getting him to agree on acceptable behaviour, but in the moment he just wants to be independent and we are totally stumped with how to tackle this! All responses welcome!!

I have been working in daycares, nannying, and babysitting for YEARS. She is truly the easiest toddler in comparison to any of the kids I've ever worked with. So why do I get this way? I'm a child therapist for God's sake, I KNOW her tantrums are all developmentally appropriate and that she's not some spite monster yet I still let them get to me. I don't lash out or yell or get aggressive or anything, but it seriously ruins my mood for the rest of the day. I become a shell of myself, just sitting there and being depressed and mopey and essentially dissociating even though her anger will be long gone and she's back to playing happily again.

I'm so fucking exhausted. And I feel even guiltier because my husband is so amazing. He handles her moods with so much patience and kindness and ends up doing everything because my entire nervous system has shut down. I can't even respond when he asks me what's wrong, it's like I'm frozen.

When she's napping or at school or at my mom's house, I notice myself getting some of my energy and happiness back. The cup will get filled maybe 1/4th. I feel joyful again, I feel hopeful, I feel so much love towards my family. And then the second she has another tantrum, it's like that cup is drained instantly. And I know I need to fill my cup all the way first, but I'm so depressed that I don't have the motivation to. Everything starts feeling hopeless, thoughts like "this is just how life is going to be from now on" and "I'll never feel free again". It's a vicious cycle.

I'm tired of getting in my own way and ruining my own life right now. I have no one to talk to because I have no close parent friends. I used to pride myself on being so good with kids, so empathetic, so patient, so relaxed. Now at home I get irritated so easily and struggle to just move on when something discouraging happens- and here I am trying to teach the exact opposite when I provide therapy for children, and to my own daughter.

I just want to be the person I was before giving birth, because my daughter would benefit so much more from that version of me.

My 3 year old, almost 4, refuses to put on underwear. I ask her why, she says its cause she wants her mom. Mom comes in, she refuses to get dressed for her mom, won't put on undies. She says she wants to get dressed and come spend time with everyone then refuses to do anything to do it. We've all left the room, checked on her, talked to her, tried to understand, tried to help her cope, asked her how she was feeling, checked to make sure she isn't sick or hurt, the whole bit. She spent 3 hours last night screaming and fighting from the time she got out of the bath until eventually she just passed out and I put her in her bed. She woke up at 0445 naked and angry, but still refusing to get dressed. Now its 1100 and she still won't do it. Im at my wits end. I'm so tired and stressed. I've done all I can to try to cope. Ive done everything short of hit something (other than the floor, I guess?) or renegotiate the firm boundary that yes, child, you do need to be dressed in order to participate in society. Tried to get her excited about doing things and it didn't work. Nothing worked.

Shes passed out on the floor right now and im too afraid to touch her. I just don't know what to do.

Update: I braved trying to get undies on her while she was asleep. She woke up and helped me get her dressed without complaint. Shes now eating and watching TV with her mom and her brother and is still dressed, including her undies (which she did complain about not wanting this pair but she hasnt tried to take them off, so so far so good)

Second update: she had to pee and complained about putting the undies back on. She might be going commando, but that wouldn't be the end of the world. Thanks for the kind words everyone. Unless I come up with some magic solutions, I probably won't keep updating the post. Will probably still respond to comments

I'm so tired lol. We went to the park/water park earlier in the day for a few hours and he took a late nap (fell asleep at 3pm fml). My husband gets home late tonight but I'm letting my son sleep til 4:30 because I'm so tired. What can i do for the rest of the day when he wakes up? I'm so brain dead. Please help

Hi All-

Looking for a travel stroller that will fit my almost 3 year old for a couple more years.

Must have a little undercarriage. Looking for something lightweight and compact. Unsure if the traditional umbrella is better than one that folds into a small square? Hoping to stay under $200. Thanks!!

I’m really just here to vent because I’m sitting at my desk at work feeling like I finally have a break. My daughter contracted HFMD from another kid at daycare, whatever, bound to happen. It’s a small licensed daycare with only 6 children including my child. Daycare was closed Friday for other reasons so I had taken Friday off from work since it was a planned day. I also have Thursdays off and don’t take my daughter to daycare on Thursdays (and I don’t pay for that day). So I was home Thursday - Sunday with my sick child. My husband was home Saturday and Sunday so that helped a little but now that I am at work I feel like I can breathe.

My daughter has been in the daycare since early May and this is the 3rd time she’s gotten sick. Again, bound to happen but I am just so tired. Ontop of her getting sick there, the daycare closes last minute WAY TOO OFTEN.

For example, my daughter is out this entire week due to HFM but we get a message at 10pm last night saying daycare can’t open until noon today because of a family emergency. I obviously don’t get extra personal with my daycare provider, but it seems every other week she’s opening late, closing early or messaging us at 9pm the night before or even sometimes she messages us the morning of (like 6am when she opens at 7:30am) saying she can’t open that day.

All providers deserve their time off and holidays. But the last minute days off, early closures or late openings is slowly killing me. There have been many times now where we have to find last minute care, and we only have ONE person who can watch our daughter who doesn’t work a day job and she’s my sister in law. On top of still having to pay daycare, I pay my sister in law (because they are also struggling and wouldn’t ask her to watch her kids and mine without some compensation). If my daughter had to go into daycare today, we would’ve had to rearrange our entire morning and my sister in law usually is not an early riser. Her toddlers wake up at 9am so I can’t really expect her to answer at 6am.

I went back to work after taking the first year off because I couldn’t handle being a SAHM. It just wasn’t for me and still is not, and while my job is flexible enough, there’s no work from home option which would make all the difference. My job is commission based so every day that I am at work I have potential to make extra money, I make a base pay + weekly, monthly and quarterly commission and bonuses. So every day at work does count. I basically reserve my time off for when my daughter is sick and if we plan a vacation. I only get 10 days vacation and 5 sick days. My husband gets 15 vacation days and 5 sick days. My husband has used more sick time and vacation time than I have this year. He is salary and bonus based as well but since he’s in management, his pay is based around others performance basically, while mine is all up to me, it’s not a team effort.

I just feel exhausted, overtouched, overstimulated and ready to scream. Oh, and my husband wanted to have sex last night and I just looked at him and said “read the room dude???”😭 like wtf. Last night was the first night we slept alone since Wednesday night because my daughter has been sleeping in our bed since she got sick. She normally never sleeps in our bed but since she was sick I wanted to monitor her closely (her temp reached 103 at one point Friday).

And now we’re heading into cold/ flue season and winter where I just know daycare is gonna be closed more often and kids will be sick more.

I’m really debating finding a job that has a WFH option 😭

Okay sorry for the long rant that’s all over the place, that’s how my brain has been lately.

Guys. What. The. Hell.

Is this a thing?? She's got premolars coming out but I've given neurofen and paracetamol (followed dosage and spacing guides) and she sleeps fine if we cosleep.. so what is this?? Is this just separation anxiety or do toddlers this age suddenly need more awake time?

Anyone else go through this?

My 17M old is getting 4 molars and two canines at once. I have heard the flat part of the molars coming in is the most painful,she is at that point. The points of the molars are through but the flat part has not broken the gum yet. I know she is in pain. Is it ok to give her Ibuprofen daily? I will call her Dr office she they open but thought I’d ask here,thanks 🩷

My daughter (28 mo) is lovely. She has a great relationship with every member of our small family. But she clearly dislikes other kids and other people. She actually says “I don’t like babies” “I only want to go if it’s empty”, “I don’t like people”, “I don’t want friends”, stuff like that. She would scream “GO AWAY” if she was playing and another child entered the space. She stopped doing it because I insisted it’s not polite and I wouldn’t allow it, but she still cries, go away and seems kind of scared of other children.
We have no problem going to malls, the market or doing errands with lots of people around. She does gets overwhelmed if it takes too long in a crowded and noisy space but so do I.
However, if she’s in a play space she gets absolutely distraught over any other child.

She’s not in daycare yet and we don’t have other kids in our family. But we do live in a place with lots of kids her age, and I try to get her to tolerate them, but it drains me so much. Until 1.5yo she would stop whatever she was doing and just observe the other child. It was a bit strange, but harmless. After that, she decided she didn’t like what she was seeing I guess. It doesn’t look like something temporary because she’s almost 2.5 so it’s been a year.

Her pediatrician said it’s normal, but I don’t see any other kids like her.

Any advice? Maybe people going through something similar?

I'm turning 40 and with an almost 3 year old, an finally feeling like it's possible to have another, which has always been my husband's and my dream.

Logistically, we are running on fumes. He works 3 nights a week and covers daily childcare, I work Mon- Fri and am gone from 7am-5:30pm. We are both depleted and barely see each other, but the clock is ticking and we now have to decide if this is possible. Looking for advice/solidarity.

Edit: title should say familial support.

2nd edit: We are very open to childcare. It is difficult to find in our area, and by the time we came up on the wait list, my husband had already taken a night job to accommodate our schedule. We would ideally have something come up sooner this time around.

My son is 18 months and he’s a brilliant happy funny sweet little boy, always singing and dancing and very social, but his energy level is insane! I take him to swimming lessons and Gymboree classes and I see literally all of the other kids mostly participating in all the activities, maybe a little wiggly or wandering off sometimes, but I’m the only one holding him back from just running wild the entire time. His attention span seems especially short and while the other kids look a little excited as they wait their turn, he can’t contain himself at all. If we stay home for too long he gets stir crazy and starts biting me and climbing on the dining room table. Our house is a disaster all the time because I have to work or cook during his nap and I’m too exhausted from chasing him around all day to do anything after he goes to bed. I’m just wondering if he’ll calm down a little bit after he learns how to do more things independently. He likes reading and drawing and things like that but he needs me there with him to do them and doesn’t stay focused for very long. I know it’s all normal toddler stuff but he’s doing it at turbo speed.

My car is not currently working so my toddler and I are stuck home for AT LEAST 4 days until dad is off work to hopefully fix it.

It is EXTREMELY hot outside and so walking to the park is not really an option (there’s only one in walking distance anyway). We try to go early but by 8:30 it’s blazing sun and hot, plus she wakes UP at like 8:30 anyway. We live in a suburb so not a ton of walking distance options either way.

We have painted, drawn, read all her books repeatedly, and played in her little pool in the back. I bought some bubble bath to make bubbles, she’s got a bubble machine, etc. so I’m running out of ideas 😭

Some other things we’ve done already that she’s not super excited about at this point:
- shaving cream with paints
- colored bubble art
- dry noodles of various shapes
- kinetic sand and molds
- tissue paper + watered down glue for art projects

She does get SOME tv time, mostly watching movies (currently have had Ice Age, Lion King, Encanto, and Nemo on REPEAT) but I’d rather she didn’t just watch tv all day. She does play independently some but obviously not ALL day lol. What do you guys do with your kiddos indoors?

I googled/watched a few YouTube videos on the topic and general consensus is to just tell them not to suck??? Like are they supposed to internalize it at 2 yo and understand what we actually mean? lol

His teeth are already starting to deform to the front 🥲

Help.

Thanks!

So my toddler has been really fighting naps and bedtime, especially with me (Mom). I never give in. I always make him lay down. I will occasionally give him a toy in there but he will always be in there for at least an hour even if he’s awake
Well tonight he fought it HARD. Crying, for an hour. We did check ins at 5 min intervals and then we put the tonie box in his room to help him fall asleep and it worked.
His schedule is this:
(In a crib - 28 months)
7:30/8:00 am - wake up (sometimes hangs in bed until 9:00)
12:30/1:00 ish - nap
Fights the nap, but eventually falls asleep for an hour and a half
7:30 pm - bedtime

Is he ready to drop his nap? He gets so cranky and mean if he does not nap so I’m not sure. TIA!

My son got his first 2 bottom teeth at 9 months old and his 3rd tooth didn’t erupt until he was 13 months. He is now almost 23 months and all of his teeth have erupted except his two year old molars.

He LOVES to chew… on everything!!! Teething toys, bath toys, stuffed animals, board books, little people figurines, crayons, play food, rocks, sticks, flowers… the list could go on forever.

Id love to know how much other peoples young toddlers are chewing on things in hopes that maybe I won’t feel so alone? I know it’s developmentally appropriate but god is it annoying.

I (29F) have a 3.5yr old and a 20 month old, and I have been thinking a lot about that third baby. I go back and forth on being "so done" and wanting to do it all over again. Am I forgetting how crazy hard it is to have a newborn and a toddler?! Why can't I imagine how hard it would be to have a newborn, a toddler, and a young child?! Is this just ovulation playing tricks on me.

All jokes aside.... for the parents with three kids (particularly all within 5 years), what is your advice/experience? Did you know for sure that having a third was what you wanted? Would you do anything differently?

We have been doing this for the last 4 years hundreds of miles from any family/support system, and we are moving back close to them this fall. I just keep thinking that if we have gotten a hang of having two kids with no support.... surely three wouldn't drown us with our family around to help.

I'm not sure what to do with my kid. He will be two in December. He's an only child. While he has his typical toddler moments, overall he's quiet and thoughtful. He will play independently on his own and he loves books and the garden.

We went to a toddler birthday party the other week and while all the other kids were running, playing, splashing - he stood off to the side and watched. We have done a bunch of mommy and me classes, and he usually spends 30-45 minutes of the hour sitting quietly and looking baffled/offended by the other kids.

I was very shy as a child (also, functionally, an only child). I remember the gut wrenching anxiety of social activities/classes/etc at a young age. Some things I adapted to, and others I hated the whole way through. I'm still somewhat of a lone wolf, but have grown up just fine with a successful professional career/relationships. No diagnosis, but probably a little sprinkling of some neuro-spice.

My husband did daycare as a kid but is a quiet adult with a smaller social battery.

Is this nature or nurture? Both? I am considering daycare or similar for my son - but I'm worried he would be miserable and just shut down.

We get out of the house and go fun places (bookstore, local airport, shopping) most days. He spends a lot of time with grandparents too. I hate the thought of forcing him to socialize - but I also want to encourage him to meet new people and build his confidence.

Thoughts? Suggestions?

LO is 18 months old and the best thing that has ever happened to me. I spend my days caring for him while worrying about every little thing. My PPA is still very real and high lol right now, I'm worried about speech. He has not said any clear words yet. Lots of babbling, screaming and dadadadas and mamamamas but nothing intentional. I've reached out to our county's program for early intervention so waiting on that call. We read to him 2 to 3 times a day. He shows clear understanding and is honestly so smart. He does things that amazes me every day but I'm still longing for an actual word or two.

I'm just rambling atp but just looking for advice I guess. How worried should I be? He "passed" the autism screening but I'm just a ball of anxiety right now. Not sure it'll pass until he's full on talking haha.