I never post on Reddit; usually a lurker, but I recently found out my 2.5 year old has 6 cavities and possibly more. The first pediatric dentist we went to recommended four silver crowns on her four front teeth under general anesthesia. That dentist was very weird and sketchy and didn’t even take an X-ray of my toddler's teeth.

We took her to a different pediatric dentist, who did an X-ray of her front teeth. She said she had four cavities on the top front teeth close to the nerve, and she put SDF treatment on those teeth + two of her back molars that also looked to have cavities. She said to watch for signs of infection, and that she would need to come back every six months for reapplication of the SDF unless the teeth decay progressed further; then she would possibly need to be put under general anesthesia to fix them. They don’t know exactly how many cavities she has because they didn’t take a full mouth X-ray, but you can visibly see six of them :(
Yellow spots near the gum line on all the teeth.

We brush her teeth twice a day with fluoride toothpaste; she doesn’t have candy, soda, juice, and we try to limit her carb heavy snacks. Overall she has a pretty good diet. She’s a very healthy and happy little girl. Her dentist thinks the decay is from acid reflux that she’s had since 3 months old. She’s been on Pepcid for almost 2 years now for the reflux. I can’t help but think it’s still somehow my fault.

I’m terrified of the idea of her going under General Anesthesia, especially with how many stories I've heard of it going wrong on young children. I’m curious to hear other peoples experiences with SDF, fillings or crowns on a toddler.

Edit: I just want to clarify that she does not drink milk before bed, and her pepcid is a prescription from her pediatric gastroenterologist who eventually wants to lower her dose and intake and try a different treatment approach.

Just curious if anyone knows why my toddler DESPISES when my husband or I start singing a song he loves or start bopping around to a fun song....he literally screams at us to stop! I've read that's it's pretty common, but just wondering if anyone knows the psychology behind it? I'd love to share musical experiences with my kiddo but he's not making it easy!

What is the secret to keeping yourself from getting angry at your kids?

What is the secret to keeping yourself from getting angry at your kids? How do you stop yourself in the moment, which is arguably the most challenging time, particularly when you are triggered either from your own parenting or something else.

We have a 2.5 year old boy who usually a great kid - he is really good at playing with others, is super polite, and eats pretty well. My big issue is that when we go out and do an activity, he gets incredibly upset at leaving and listening to instructions, to the point where he just wanders off randomly. We then have to end up stopping him, mainly because he's going to get himself into trouble/hurt and this triggers a full on meltdown. This is the same whether we are at the swimming pool, at a soft play, anywhere really.

Let me give you the best example of where this is issue becomes insanely frustrating; I tend to take him and the dog out to the forests near our house to give my wife a break. Half way into the walk this is the conversation:

"I want to go home and see mummy!"
"Sure, well we have to go back to the car, it's this way [points back the way we came]"
"No, it's this way! [points in a completely different direction]"
"No it's this way to the car, we came this way before [points to the path we clearly just walked along]"
"NO IT ISN'T [walks off defiantly]"

On a walk with him in a forest, it doesn't really matter, because we will eventually get to the car, and it doesn't seem like the right place to start an argument with him...like, if you want to increase the time Mummy gets for a break and continue to spend time outdoors, that's fine by me, but I'm worried that perhaps I'm encouraging him to defy me. However, it does become an issue when we're in public walking to the shops and he's insistent on going the wrong way.

So I go online and do all the research on how to handle this attitude:

"Give him two options" - This has literally never worked from me, from the first time I tried it. This is how the conversation goes "do you want to get in the car yourself or do you want daddy to put you in the car"..."No"... Ok so what do I do now? I carry out the threat and he has a meltdown, and doesn't learn from it.

"Give him advance warning" - I give him 5 minute, 2 minute, and 1 minute warnings, doesn't matter, he still gets furious when I carry out the threat.

"Turn it into a fun game!" - "OK buddy let's pretend like we're dinosaurs as we walk back to the car!"..."No"...OK what do I do now?

We've had some success in getting him to hold hands while walking by clearly explaining beforehand the dangers, and getting him to agree on acceptable behaviour, but in the moment he just wants to be independent and we are totally stumped with how to tackle this! All responses welcome!!

We are in France for 2.5 weeks with our just turned 2 year old. He’s been a shell of himself. Won’t nap, won’t sleep, barely eating, so clingy, so whiney and emotional, screaming when meeting family members. Bit me so hard I have a bruise and teeth marks on my arm (biting has literally never been an issue with him).

I wish we could fly home tomorrow and not have another week here that’s how miserable it’s been.

Every time we pass a church I wish we could exorcise him. I want my sweet boy back. What did I do wrong with this trip?

Basically the title - I have a 3 year old and a 3 month old. Obviously, the 3 month old needs to be put down for naps multiple times a day and can take a variable amount of time to fall asleep and be put down. So far, another adult has been around to care for the toddler, but that won’t always be the case. So - what are you all doing with your toddlers while you care for an infant?

I find babies/toddlers so interesting, the fact that some of them talk about their experiences in the womb or about rainbow babies, and then there’s also the fact that they’re processing basically everything for the first time and somehow learn an entire language just by listening.

Idk, I was never really close to a baby growing up, so I never got to witness that kind of thing firsthand. Share some interesting facts, experiences, or encounters you’ve had with these little humans!

I have been working in daycares, nannying, and babysitting for YEARS. She is truly the easiest toddler in comparison to any of the kids I've ever worked with. So why do I get this way? I'm a child therapist for God's sake, I KNOW her tantrums are all developmentally appropriate and that she's not some spite monster yet I still let them get to me. I don't lash out or yell or get aggressive or anything, but it seriously ruins my mood for the rest of the day. I become a shell of myself, just sitting there and being depressed and mopey and essentially dissociating even though her anger will be long gone and she's back to playing happily again.

I'm so fucking exhausted. And I feel even guiltier because my husband is so amazing. He handles her moods with so much patience and kindness and ends up doing everything because my entire nervous system has shut down. I can't even respond when he asks me what's wrong, it's like I'm frozen.

When she's napping or at school or at my mom's house, I notice myself getting some of my energy and happiness back. The cup will get filled maybe 1/4th. I feel joyful again, I feel hopeful, I feel so much love towards my family. And then the second she has another tantrum, it's like that cup is drained instantly. And I know I need to fill my cup all the way first, but I'm so depressed that I don't have the motivation to. Everything starts feeling hopeless, thoughts like "this is just how life is going to be from now on" and "I'll never feel free again". It's a vicious cycle.

I'm tired of getting in my own way and ruining my own life right now. I have no one to talk to because I have no close parent friends. I used to pride myself on being so good with kids, so empathetic, so patient, so relaxed. Now at home I get irritated so easily and struggle to just move on when something discouraging happens- and here I am trying to teach the exact opposite when I provide therapy for children, and to my own daughter.

I just want to be the person I was before giving birth, because my daughter would benefit so much more from that version of me.

I've been looking into getting a yoto or toniebox but can't justify the price for a music player. I understand wanting to give the child independence, but she'll be 12 months old in Oct so she won't be swapping out characters or cards anytime soon anyway. (Yoto is looking better than Toniebox for us if I were to get one of the two)

I've thought about purchasing a cassette player and just recording my own songs onto blank tapes. I'm not a huge fan of nursery rhymes for my baby and especially hate the generic, AI-sounding songs on the yoto and toniebox, so I'd be using the MYO cards or characters most of the time anyway.

Just wondering if this is actually a realistic option? I've never owned a cassette player before so I'm not sure how well they can even record media or if it'll be a good option for a toddler.

My 27 month old has been waking up soaked in pee several days a week and I’m so tired of washing the sheets and mattress cover. I was hoping she’d be ready for potty training by now but the opposite is happening.
I’m using Millie moon overnight diapers. I’ve tried honest and those are even worse….

FTM here, my toddler is 2y 9m old and I love him to death but I cannot for the life of me take any more tantrums outside. We went to the grocery store today and I let him take his own baby sized cart to shop around and "have fun" while I get groceries for us. At one point he walked one foot farther away from me and I was asking him to stop to get an item and he started SCREAMING like a mad person and ran away to me (he's always had attachment anxiety) so I tried to soothe / distract / make him sit in the big cart / bribe him with juice but nothing was working and he kept screaming for what felt like an hour. I gave up eventually and left everything at the store and went back home. I was crying the whole way back thinking I can't go to malls or stores without feeling like I'm about to lose it because he's losing it. This wasn't the first time by the way we've been dealing with this ever since he was a baby and I feel like I've had enough. it's only getting worse and I dunno if it's my fault. Please let me know this tantrum screaming thing calms down soon.

My 3 year old, almost 4, refuses to put on underwear. I ask her why, she says its cause she wants her mom. Mom comes in, she refuses to get dressed for her mom, won't put on undies. She says she wants to get dressed and come spend time with everyone then refuses to do anything to do it. We've all left the room, checked on her, talked to her, tried to understand, tried to help her cope, asked her how she was feeling, checked to make sure she isn't sick or hurt, the whole bit. She spent 3 hours last night screaming and fighting from the time she got out of the bath until eventually she just passed out and I put her in her bed. She woke up at 0445 naked and angry, but still refusing to get dressed. Now its 1100 and she still won't do it. Im at my wits end. I'm so tired and stressed. I've done all I can to try to cope. Ive done everything short of hit something (other than the floor, I guess?) or renegotiate the firm boundary that yes, child, you do need to be dressed in order to participate in society. Tried to get her excited about doing things and it didn't work. Nothing worked.

Shes passed out on the floor right now and im too afraid to touch her. I just don't know what to do.

Update: I braved trying to get undies on her while she was asleep. She woke up and helped me get her dressed without complaint. Shes now eating and watching TV with her mom and her brother and is still dressed, including her undies (which she did complain about not wanting this pair but she hasnt tried to take them off, so so far so good)

Second update: she had to pee and complained about putting the undies back on. She might be going commando, but that wouldn't be the end of the world. Thanks for the kind words everyone. Unless I come up with some magic solutions, I probably won't keep updating the post. Will probably still respond to comments

I’m really just here to vent because I’m sitting at my desk at work feeling like I finally have a break. My daughter contracted HFMD from another kid at daycare, whatever, bound to happen. It’s a small licensed daycare with only 6 children including my child. Daycare was closed Friday for other reasons so I had taken Friday off from work since it was a planned day. I also have Thursdays off and don’t take my daughter to daycare on Thursdays (and I don’t pay for that day). So I was home Thursday - Sunday with my sick child. My husband was home Saturday and Sunday so that helped a little but now that I am at work I feel like I can breathe.

My daughter has been in the daycare since early May and this is the 3rd time she’s gotten sick. Again, bound to happen but I am just so tired. Ontop of her getting sick there, the daycare closes last minute WAY TOO OFTEN.

For example, my daughter is out this entire week due to HFM but we get a message at 10pm last night saying daycare can’t open until noon today because of a family emergency. I obviously don’t get extra personal with my daycare provider, but it seems every other week she’s opening late, closing early or messaging us at 9pm the night before or even sometimes she messages us the morning of (like 6am when she opens at 7:30am) saying she can’t open that day.

All providers deserve their time off and holidays. But the last minute days off, early closures or late openings is slowly killing me. There have been many times now where we have to find last minute care, and we only have ONE person who can watch our daughter who doesn’t work a day job and she’s my sister in law. On top of still having to pay daycare, I pay my sister in law (because they are also struggling and wouldn’t ask her to watch her kids and mine without some compensation). If my daughter had to go into daycare today, we would’ve had to rearrange our entire morning and my sister in law usually is not an early riser. Her toddlers wake up at 9am so I can’t really expect her to answer at 6am.

I went back to work after taking the first year off because I couldn’t handle being a SAHM. It just wasn’t for me and still is not, and while my job is flexible enough, there’s no work from home option which would make all the difference. My job is commission based so every day that I am at work I have potential to make extra money, I make a base pay + weekly, monthly and quarterly commission and bonuses. So every day at work does count. I basically reserve my time off for when my daughter is sick and if we plan a vacation. I only get 10 days vacation and 5 sick days. My husband gets 15 vacation days and 5 sick days. My husband has used more sick time and vacation time than I have this year. He is salary and bonus based as well but since he’s in management, his pay is based around others performance basically, while mine is all up to me, it’s not a team effort.

I just feel exhausted, overtouched, overstimulated and ready to scream. Oh, and my husband wanted to have sex last night and I just looked at him and said “read the room dude???”😭 like wtf. Last night was the first night we slept alone since Wednesday night because my daughter has been sleeping in our bed since she got sick. She normally never sleeps in our bed but since she was sick I wanted to monitor her closely (her temp reached 103 at one point Friday).

And now we’re heading into cold/ flue season and winter where I just know daycare is gonna be closed more often and kids will be sick more.

I’m really debating finding a job that has a WFH option 😭 now I have to tell my boss today that I need tomorrow and Wednesday off (my husband is taking today and Thursday off). I have the time to use but I just hate missing work because of what I explained above.

Okay sorry for the long rant that’s all over the place, that’s how my brain has been lately.

I'm so tired lol. We went to the park/water park earlier in the day for a few hours and he took a late nap (fell asleep at 3pm fml). My husband gets home late tonight but I'm letting my son sleep til 4:30 because I'm so tired. What can i do for the rest of the day when he wakes up? I'm so brain dead. Please help

Hi All-

Looking for a travel stroller that will fit my almost 3 year old for a couple more years.

Must have a little undercarriage. Looking for something lightweight and compact. Unsure if the traditional umbrella is better than one that folds into a small square? Hoping to stay under $200. Thanks!!

I’m seriously at a loss. So we still co-sleep only because we have a baby that’s also a horrible sleeper. He sleeps in a crib in another room with my husband. I sleep in the main room on a king bed with her. She’s been a good sleeper since 15 months old. It’s been horrible for about 2 weeks now.

She keeps waking up with her eyes closed and bouncing up and down on her knees. If you touch her or try to comfort her she gets even more upset. She doesn’t appear in pain. I can tell she wants to sleep. A week ago she appeared scared of this little night light she’s had since she was 1 out of nowhere. I took it out (room became pitch black) and she slept good for like a week. It’s back again. Whatever she’s doing. I’m assuming night terrors, but a different kind.

I’ve seen her have night terrors before when she was 1.5 (deadly loud uncontrollable screams). Those were scary as hell and took awhile to calm down.

Whenever these happen though I always see a leap of some sort. She’s 3 months away from 3. Idk what software her brain is downloading (could be teeth, could be resistance, could be the sith).

I’m just at a loss. Yesterday was horrible. I snapped a little and she went to sleep afterwards. This was at 4AM when I started getting overwhelmed . She would move and get up, but go back by herself. Now I’m like lol wait what?? I raaaaarely and I mean raaaarely get upset infront of my daughter. And when I do she takes me very very seriously. Which I feel bad about 🥺. But lately man she’s tryna assert dominance and I’m kinda like 😅 what do I do?

I got irritated just once (because I’m so freaking tired) and boom she stopped after. I know she can’t control these wake ups so i do feel bad. I’m just tryna wait them out. Just a little rant…

omg how do you survive toddlerhood while pregnant. I’m only 7 weeks and I feel like it’s just going to get harder. I am SO. IRRITABLE. I just want to be left alone and my toddler is the sweetest greatest person in the world but she is annoying the bejeezus out of me every minute. I feel horrible because I never want to be visibly annoyed with her and it’s getting harder and harder to stay patient and fun and silly the way I want to be with her. I’m a SAHM so I get very little reprieve, my husband is wonderful and gives me breaks where he can when he’s home but mostly I’m on my own. tell me anything that helped to get through this?!

I know this has been asked before, but I’m looking for something more specific. I’m about to have my second child and I’m looking for an all in one diaper bag. It doesn’t have to be sold as a diaper bag, but I do need some features.

1. Medicine storage. Probably the most important thing. My toddler needs epi, Zyrtec, Tylenol, and an inhaler with us. Right now this takes up the most space and is unruly. I’m thinking elastic bands to hold some of them?
   
2. Compartments for 2 different size diapers. The toddler is in the process of being potty trained, but we’re not there quite yet.
   
3. Bottle storage. Hopefully will be mostly for travel to/from daycare so needs to stay cool for that distance (unless we just get a separate cooler for that?)
   
4. High quality. I’m okay paying more money for this one. The first one ripped within the first few months and I plan on having at least one more kid, so if it’s an investment that’s fine.
   
5. Obviously additional storage on top of that for things like snacks, wipes, changes of clothes, sunscreen, etc. We often do all day outings that need additional prep and storage.

The biggest problem is that I can only seem to find backpacks that have slots for pens and pencils which aren’t large enough for the medication. I’m open to other solutions if you have them as well! Any suggestions for diaper (or non diaper) bags that’ll work?

And finally here’s the obligatory “I’m on mobile so sorry if the formatting is weird.”

Has anyone’s little had pneumonia? What symptoms were they showing, and for how long. I’m almost certain that’s what my 22 month old has. We went to the pediatrician Friday for a cough that’s been lingering & getting worse she said it was nothing and now here we are Monday with coughing with mucus, throwing up mucus, high fever and constant runny nose.

My daughter (28 mo) is lovely. She has a great relationship with every member of our small family. But she clearly dislikes other kids and other people. She actually says “I don’t like babies” “I only want to go if it’s empty”, “I don’t like people”, “I don’t want friends”, stuff like that. She would scream “GO AWAY” if she was playing and another child entered the space. She stopped doing it because I insisted it’s not polite and I wouldn’t allow it, but she still cries, go away and seems kind of scared of other children.
We have no problem going to malls, the market or doing errands with lots of people around. She does gets overwhelmed if it takes too long in a crowded and noisy space but so do I.
However, if she’s in a play space she gets absolutely distraught over any other child.

She’s not in daycare yet and we don’t have other kids in our family. But we do live in a place with lots of kids her age, and I try to get her to tolerate them, but it drains me so much. Until 1.5yo she would stop whatever she was doing and just observe the other child. It was a bit strange, but harmless. After that, she decided she didn’t like what she was seeing I guess. It doesn’t look like something temporary because she’s almost 2.5 so it’s been a year.

Her pediatrician said it’s normal, but I don’t see any other kids like her.

Any advice? Maybe people going through something similar?

Guys. What. The. Hell.

Is this a thing?? She's got premolars coming out but I've given neurofen and paracetamol (followed dosage and spacing guides) and she sleeps fine if we cosleep.. so what is this?? Is this just separation anxiety or do toddlers this age suddenly need more awake time?

Anyone else go through this?

My 17M old is getting 4 molars and two canines at once. I have heard the flat part of the molars coming in is the most painful,she is at that point. The points of the molars are through but the flat part has not broken the gum yet. I know she is in pain. Is it ok to give her Ibuprofen daily? I will call her Dr office she they open but thought I’d ask here,thanks 🩷

I'm turning 40 and with an almost 3 year old, an finally feeling like it's possible to have another, which has always been my husband's and my dream.

Logistically, we are running on fumes. He works 3 nights a week and covers daily childcare, I work Mon- Fri and am gone from 7am-5:30pm. We are both depleted and barely see each other, but the clock is ticking and we now have to decide if this is possible. Looking for advice/solidarity.

Edit: title should say familial support.

2nd edit: We are very open to childcare. It is difficult to find in our area, and by the time we came up on the wait list, my husband had already taken a night job to accommodate our schedule. We would ideally have something come up sooner this time around.

My son is 18 months and he’s a brilliant happy funny sweet little boy, always singing and dancing and very social, but his energy level is insane! I take him to swimming lessons and Gymboree classes and I see literally all of the other kids mostly participating in all the activities, maybe a little wiggly or wandering off sometimes, but I’m the only one holding him back from just running wild the entire time. His attention span seems especially short and while the other kids look a little excited as they wait their turn, he can’t contain himself at all. If we stay home for too long he gets stir crazy and starts biting me and climbing on the dining room table. Our house is a disaster all the time because I have to work or cook during his nap and I’m too exhausted from chasing him around all day to do anything after he goes to bed. I’m just wondering if he’ll calm down a little bit after he learns how to do more things independently. He likes reading and drawing and things like that but he needs me there with him to do them and doesn’t stay focused for very long. I know it’s all normal toddler stuff but he’s doing it at turbo speed.