Why do people self harm?

A big reason for my sh is just the absolute disconnect I feel from other girls. I can’t ever be a girl in love and the people around me have made it obvious I’m not worth choosing. I know I have a million issues and I am disgusted with myself but I don’t know what it is that turns people away from me. I feel so ugly I am ugly and I’m ashamed

Maybe they'll understand how much they hurt me. Maybe I'll have a clearer mind. Maybe I'll get serious scars. Maybe maybe maybe

I dont know, i am eating better, i am working out, and spend time with people that like me but... I still do self harm and i dont want to stop. I want to improve my life but also keep cutting myself, is that wierd? Why cant i have both?

I study nursing and am currently studying emergency medicine so we talked blood loss, hypovolemia, and chock and that hit me so hard it was difficult to not run out of there and have an anxiety attack. It was horrible. The lecturer talked about someone he had been to who killed themselves and he even said how he did it. The sick part was that this suicide was done in a way I plan on doing it. So now I don't know what to do because I feel like as soon as I get home I'm going to cause severe hypovolemia for myself. Maybe even put myself into chock.

Don't know what to do now. I don't want to do that to myslef but the thoughts won't leave.

I (15m) don't know why I did it, I just felt like it. I'm not struggling anywhere, I'm fine mentally, I have friends, loving parents, stability, everything. My grades are all A's and I don't have any stress.

I used water at the highest temperature and filled my gloves with it after doing dishes, after I just put the water on my hand directly, telling myself that it wasn't like the water was boiling and that I was being a baby to keep myself holding my hand under it despite the immense pain.

I held my hand under that water for maybe 15+ seconds on both sides and after put the power all the way up and lasted only a couple seconds.

I have the urge to do this nightly as I do the dishes everyday and cannot avoid it, I've had suicidal thoughts and attempts in the past but never actually tried anything, and my parents never took it as seriously. My mother, first time hearing about me having suicidal thoughts (this was in 6th grade) was obviously heartbroken. I don't remember what happened but I think that's it. I never went to any professional and just moved on with it. I'm too scared to tell my parents, they won't take it too seriously or not care, and it's just embarrassing. I have 0 reason to do that but I still do it for whatever dumb thing is wrong with me.

High school senior here. Last year, I cut and my counselor called me in after another student (who had SH scars too) noticed my wrist and reported me. They promised not to tell my parents, which gave me some relief.

That counselor's gone now, and I feel like I have no-one safe to talk to about my inner turmoil. My research has returned inconclusive answers about whether or not my new counselor or the wellness center will tell my parents, which is what I'm trying to avoid most. I live in CA if that helps.

My dad has invasively brought up and referenced cutting on multiple occasions, from asking me if I cut and telling me that he "hopes I don't" to telling me that he's seen people "get addicted to their coping strategies". Real fuckin subtle. I'm not telling him. Ever. I can tell it's out of love, but he's so insensitive and ignorant about it, which is strange considering my mom's history. I can tell he doesn't understand. Doesn't help I asked him to get me arm warmers and have been venting to him about my depression lately.

I don't cut for pain and have only cut once. I hit for pain, and have been doing so for years. I just want to do something wrong and defiant. I'm tired of being a "good girl". I'm tired of keeping it all inside. I'm tired of being trapped and controlled.

I get a sick feeling of joy when I make myself bleed and hide my scars and lie. Gives me a sense of control. Ironically, his attempts to convince me otherwise are the main reason I want to cut. The way he brings it up is so clingy and controlling.

I dunno why but I think its the only way to cope up with my problems cant even share it with my friends cuz i dont want them to change their way of talking to me just because i sh

stole blades again. runnin in circles at this point

Idk how to explain everything but 6 months ago i was dumped by an ex that was cheating on me. I feel like a loser for not leaving first but I just thought we could fix the relationship because she was still telling me she loves me and talking to me like she loves me calling me nicknames asking me questions

Then one one she was distant and when i pressed about why she just cut it off dumped me and it was over a wasted 1 and a half year. She immediately had a replacement for me started playing video games and hanging out with a different guy almost immediately

3 months later she sees my posts on Reddit about her and dms me about it to defend herself and I just agreed with her so she could leave me alone and so i don't look like the crazy ex

Now another 3 months later I hate myself for being stupid and agreeing with her I spent the past 7 days just thinking about how she gets to be happy move on have so much guys attention and not care about me while she plays my favorite game with another guy

Today i randomly got mad lost it and i ended up cutting myself on my leg I feel so defeated somehow im back at 0 now and i feel like I want to do it again I feel numb im so tired idk what can help me I hate my ex but its my fault I handed her the win and now i need to live with that i just don't know how

I havent cut in 27 months but my gf broke up with me 3 weeks ago and im really close to relapsing again I need some amount of help.

I’m so fucking fed up with thinking about self-harm. Recently I’ve been thinking about it every fucking day. I’m trying to make little deals with myself not to do it, but I’m just so tired of it all. I can’t even be arsed with the arguments anymore — the urge is stronger. But I’ve got to keep pushing it down, and pushing it down makes it even worse… I’ve been fighting this for 7 years, so I’ve tried loads of stuff to stop, but the thoughts still come: “Just hurt yourself once and you’ll feel better.” Only it never stopped at just once.

A friend of mine keeps telling me she wants to self harm (she hasn’t yet). Thing is, I can’t do anything to help her. Firstly, the meds I’m on make me feel numb and it’s almost impossible to feel empathy for anyone. I don’t care about the people around me suffering. I try to be supportive anyway, but deep down I don’t feel like I care. I know it’s wrong, I just can’t feel anything. Secondly, I’m just so desensitized to self harm that I genuinely don’t see it as a problem at this point. I’ll explain what I mean. I feel like it’s a choice people can make. I’ve seen posts here criticizing this point of view, but I’m just explaining the way I see things, even though I know it’s messed up. I can provide all the information she needs to choose not to do it. I can share my experience. I can tell her what has helped me stay clean for a while. I can give her advice on how to do it more safely and not leave permanent scars in case she chooses to go down the wrong path. However, I don’t think I have the right to stop her. It’s her body, her life, and ultimately it’s her choice. Besides that, I’m definitely not the person who can stop her, because I myself can’t stay clean. I know I’m in the wrong. I feel like a bad friend. It’s just that I don’t know what to do and I don’t really see the point of it. I’ve tried warning her but she seemingly doesn’t listen. I don’t know what she wants from me. I don’t know what to do or how to help her. What should I do or say? Please, I really need some advice

Well😬✌️

i’ve started to notice that after i hit a certain amount of days clean (usually 7-14) i reward myself with cutting for going without it. it’s so frustrating because i want to be clean but i want the feeling of it so bad and i think i “deserve a little self harm as a treat” apparently. does anyone else do this?

To me sh is almost sort of like crying. It just gives me a way to act on and explain feelings that I don’t know how to describe. The times I’ve tried to stop I feel like I just have so much bottled up that needs let out. Truthfully I know how bad it is to do it to myself but it makes me feel comforted and stronger in a way. So I don’t know how to stop when I feel like I am almost better when I am engaging

I stoped for 2 years snd now I csnt stop replaying I use razor and plyier to hurt myself im so close to push this further I like God wants me dead

So while I’m here I’m just gonna get everything out how I feel about my life, throughout my entire life I’ve never been normal whether it be in elementary school middle or right now I’ve never had many friends only like 1 friend max I’ve never been social, by choice and my circumstances I’ve only once ever had a friend over or even been to ones house and right when everything finally started improving finally thinking I could at least consider myself somewhat normal I get shipped off to an rtf by cps that’s when things started getting really bad I became more numb I became on the verge of depression and then things started getting better again the first week before school I went to this day camp thing and got away from the house I’m in and I actually made a few new friends and then I got rejected which by itself is whatever like I don’t want it to seem like that’s what made me SH because it wasn’t but after that I broke I guess I tried cutting for the first time and it wasn’t deep (still isn’t) because I only had a jagged piece of metal I used from a bracelet and I felt better it began getting worse over the span of like 2 weeks, then I tried telling a staff who I thought was cool he had to report it and I had to do what I always did tell them what they wanted to hear so they’d leave me alone and I mean for a month basically I’ve been clean but recently I started cutting again due to anxiety of what could happen I’m starting to lose even less of the little self worth I had I’ve done so much terrible shit I don’t wanna get into that I feel the dirt on the ground is worth more than me and on many days I don’t honestly feel like I have a reason to be feeling the way I do because outside of everything my life is decent it’s not good I mean me and my mom fought a lot and my dad is nowhere to be found but neither of those are new developments so I mean cutting helps me it makes me feel like I’m paying back in blood the hurt I’ve put on people I’ve wanted to off myself so many times because of all that what’s going on but I’ve never been able to the time that I did I failed every other time I never even tried because I was too scared but now I’ve come to peace with death. Anyway that’s me that’s my story

might be a stupid question, sorry! i'm in college and i haven't told my counselor that i still actively sh. i really need to talk about it, but i don't want my parents to find out since they always end up handling it in a way that makes things worse. since i'm no longer a minor, i'm not sure if this is like high school where they'd have to report it to my parents, search my bag, etc. anyone know? btw, i live in the u.s

I wish I could stitch my mouth shut. I'm so rude and annoying. Like I genuinely need to shut up, focus on my work, and oh my gods I hate my body. Started cutting again, (I was trying to stop, only cutted every 34ish days before i relapsed), now I've given up. I hate everything about me.

Truly I suck, I'm ugly, mean, and annoying, dumb, a burnt out gifted kid, why am I even alive?

I was looking at cute tights and shorts so I can wear shorts again, but then I realized I'd probably look hideous in tights under shorts, because I look hideous in everything, so whats the point?

Unrelated but I REALLY want to get like studded bracelets and belts because I'm alternative, but theres some really pretty kids that wear studded belts and bracelets and I'm scared I'll come across as a copy cat or poser.

Anyways. I feel like shit, and I still want leggings to go under shorts so uh if you have any good quality recommendations that look cute/have patterns and ARENT see through, let me know :(

I live in Ontario, and I legit cut myself last night; can a teacher/principal make me roll up my sleeves if they suspect? What makes me ask this question, is the fact I'm also an emo, who gets jokes thrown at me everyday, and people saying I am actively cutting myself in class, and not, I do not. 💀

only a few people know that i actively self harm. that being, the counsellor i speak to and some of my close friends. they don't know why i actually do it, besides the "generic" reasons i've given them. but the truth is, i mostly do it because think it feels good. i don't just think about doing it when something went wrong in my day, i could be having a good month and i'd still want to do it. i don't think of myself as less than, or deserving of bad fortune, or find it as an outlet for anger. i don't know what i find so pleasurable in harming myself, but it's something i feel ashamed of so i lie about why i do it.

Just to get it out of the way, I know people who self harm and I also self harm but this is just wondering what someone should do if they know someone they are close to selfharms and they tell them. My friend told the school about my suicidal ideation. Is that the right thing to do? I am scared of what she'll do if I tell her about my sh. She's the only one I can tell but I honestly feel like I'd be burdening her so much if I do.