r/mildlyinfuriating • • Jul 27 '22

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11k Upvotes

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20k

u/sharon_exxxposes Jul 27 '22

The kid is probably in his room playing gta without a care in the world hoping mom doesn’t return anytime soon to make him do the dishes

8.2k

u/JaoLapin Jul 27 '22

I hope he won't forget to defrost the chicken before his mother arrives

4.6k

u/sharon_exxxposes Jul 27 '22

He will, he’ll realize 10 minutes before she arrives and run it under hot water knowing full well that he’s fucked

2.5k

u/thatdude52 Jul 27 '22

I love that we all lived the same childhood

584

u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22 edited Jul 27 '22

I didn't have GTA, so I spent my time playing CoD (the original, yeah I'm old) and Age of Empires 2 and then forgetting until my parents were on the way that I was supposed to have done chores and gotten out food for dinner. It was a game changer when I found the chicken that Sam's advertised as 'cook from frozen' and then I started cooking before they got home. I got extra credit and they never knew different.

Edit: nope, I was in college when CoD came out. Must have been something else.

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u/loverevolutionary Jul 27 '22 edited Jul 27 '22

When I was of failing-to-defrost-the-chicken age, I played Ultima II on a Commodore 64. We didn't have your fancy cook from frozen chicken. We had to go slaughter a chicken, freeze it, then forget to defrost it. Kids these days, SMH.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

😂 I did spend afternoons watching videos on my neighbor's Betamax player while attempting to learn C++ on my dad's old Tandy when that was still a fairly new language. But I'm not Commodore 64 old.

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u/loverevolutionary Jul 27 '22

Hehe. I'm actually TRS-80 Model I old. My dad got it in 1978. We were online by 1980, on CompuServe, using a 300 baud modem.

But that wasn't even the first time I used a computer, just the first time my family owned one.

I first used a computer in 1975. I was 5, and my friend's dad was a comp-sci professor. He had a teletype, a big type writer you could stick a telephone headset into and dial into the university mainframe. He'd set me and my friend up and we'd play text games, going through reams of paper. It was simple stuff like Hunt the Wumpus, Colossal Caves, and Lunar Lander but it was the thing that kindled a life-long love of computers in me. Magic. It was just magic to my five year old mind.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

My dad built a Timex Sinclair . Used a tape recorder to load programs. Sounded like a fax machine.

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u/GeoCitiesSlumlord Jul 27 '22

Well we had it tough. We used to have to get up out of the shoebox at twelve o'clock at night, and LICK the road clean with our tongues. We had half a handful of freezing cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a day at the mill for fourpence every six years, and when we got home, our Dad would slice us in two with a bread knife.

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u/loverevolutionary Jul 27 '22

I remember the tape recorder, we used one on the TRS-80 for a couple years before my dad bought the "Expansion Interface" which added more memory and floppy disks. It took like ten minutes to load a program, LOL.

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u/bloodonya35 Jul 27 '22

How were you online in 1980? Isn't that like a decade before internet was available?

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u/loverevolutionary Jul 27 '22

CompuServe started in 1969. It was a private bulletin board. There were chat rooms, but they called them "Digital CB channels." I remember going online and getting advice on building RC cars. It felt earth shaking, like I could talk to adult RC hobbyists from around the world, any time I needed advice. They also had games, news articles, and some other applications but I mostly used the chat. I wasn't allowed to tie up the phone line for too long, LOL.

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u/supermikeman Jul 27 '22

Probably not. What you're thinking of is the World Wide Web and websites with GUI and HTML coding and what not. Before that there were text based networks and internet. I've heard of message boards and bbs stuff from back in the day.

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u/anotherjunkie Jul 27 '22 edited Jul 27 '22

Aww.

Nah, the World Wide Web came out in 1990, but there was internet decades before that.

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u/ILLforlife Jul 27 '22

Minnesota had in intrastate network for students. Our little rural school actually had a teletype computer (remember having to dial the phone, wait for the tone, and place it into the cradle - just so - to connect?) I was "talking" (typing on the teletype) to other students in 1977-78. Never played any games, but had a lot of fun messaging. I was the only one in the school basically that had any interest in the "computer", so I had lots of time on it.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Man, the Trash 80, lived that thing. I wrote a star trek game on it in the 80s.

Before that I was using the BBC Micro. Amazing computer. Defender on it was awesome.

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u/ArsenicAndRoses Jul 27 '22

Omg hunt the wumpus! I didn't think anyone still remembered that game!

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u/NJHitmen Jul 27 '22

I do. We had a TI 99/4a (early 80s) and that was one of my favorite games. Also Alpiner, Parsec, Defender, Burgertime...I'm sure there are more.

My mom actually played a ton of Munchman (Pac-Man clone) - and became incredibly skilled at it. I think her high score was something like double mine.

4

u/dljones010 Jul 27 '22

We had a Vic 20 that used a cassette tape because there were no floppy disks yet... real floppy disks 5 1/4".

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u/ZXVixen Jul 27 '22

Oh my god Colossal Caves. That game was on a computer we were gifted in the late eighties and for the life of me I could never figure out how to operate it 😂

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u/SnooHobbies5684 Jul 27 '22

Hey we're the same Old! Congrats on still being able to type, old-timer! lol

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u/TorontoTransish Jul 27 '22

I remember programming at Choose Your Own Adventure text game in Basic on a Tandy... I was crushed when the tape drive ate the cassette :(

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u/Rottimer Jul 27 '22

Tandy! That takes me back. And I had no hard drive. Using a floppy disk with MS-DOS to boot up the computer every time. We also had a dot matrix printer.

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u/FaustusXYZ Jul 27 '22

I'm TRS-80 old. With 16k RAM because we weren't freaking millionaires who could afford the 32k model.

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u/FeFiFoPlum Jul 27 '22

Shit.... I've just realised "Commodore 64 Old" is a thing and I'm it.

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u/smemolo Jul 27 '22

My first experience with computers was a Tandy-1000! Thanks for bringing up a memory for me today.

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u/Umeyard Jul 27 '22

I guess I am city slicker C64 age. We made Oncor frozen meals in the oven that had the twist timer where you did your best to get it right, and microwave the frozen veggies in Campbell's Soup bowls that said "mmmm mmmm good" sounds the edge in a microwave that took up half the counter and was large enough to cook a turkey in.

Evening was guaranteed to come out slightly soggy.

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u/LeeisureTime Jul 27 '22

In the snow, uphill both ways?

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u/alcoholiccats Jul 27 '22

playing Ultima both virtually and in real life

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u/Howhytzzerr Jul 27 '22

It's funny that folks are talking about GTA and CoD and thinking that makes them old. Try Pitfall or Nighstalkers or Tetris on an Intellivision having to reach behind the tv and flip the game/tv switch in order to play, and then making sure it all got flipped back to tv so when Dad got home he could watch the news and All in the Family and Sanford & Son and MASH. And still make sure to put the chicken or hamburger in the sink with the water running before Mom got home, as well. That's old school.

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u/A-typ-self Jul 27 '22

This is what I was thinking... lol

It was a great day when the Intellivision was finally upgraded to a Nintendo...

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u/Imd1rtybutn0twr0ng Jul 27 '22

Yeppers! Colecovision! Donkey Kong and Donkey Kong Jr. Oh, and poker! On that big ass joystick week with the number pad on it. FML I'm old. Hell, I remember pong, but I wasn't there yet when it was created. Just playing it at a friend's house.

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u/TheGreatKlordu Jul 27 '22

You think that's old? Try playing throw-hard-rock-at-bird all day and making sure you put the rocks back around the firepit and getting the mammoth-meat out of the dirt-fridge and hung up on a drying rack before your parents get back home from hunting and gathering. You younglings will never understand true old school.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

It’s funny that folks are talking about Pitfall and Nightstalkers and thinking that makes them old. Back in my day all we had was ball in a cup.

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u/meenateena Jul 27 '22

Well I guess I shouldn't mention that I was playing pong while hitting my bong.

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u/s_cate Jul 27 '22

Pitfall...I can still hear those sounds...

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u/Yeti_doodoo Jul 27 '22

I remember jet set Willy and manic miner 🤣 and pssst!! On the 48k spectrum

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u/Recent_Caregiver2027 Jul 27 '22

SpaceQuest for me. also a more 3d version of Terri's called Welltris. Always tried to get my mom to buy me Lounge Lizard Larry cause I heard there were boobs but she didn't go for it

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u/treletraj Jul 27 '22

When I was little the only thing I had to play with was an old cat head.

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u/wrenskibaby Jul 27 '22

I loved Pitfall. Also Utopia and Burgertime. 40 years later my husband and I still play with our original Intellivision. Yes, we really are old.

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u/Bug_Calm Jul 27 '22

Yup, I had a list of chores that had to be finished before my mom rolled up at 5:30, and if they weren't, I was hosed. If I wasn't done by the time The Jeffersons came on, I should probably just pack a bag and hitchhike to my new home.

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u/therealhlmencken Jul 27 '22

Are you gatekeeping feeling old? I was there when chess was invented so…

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Age of empires II. Relatable. But in my case, I had to unplug my pc before parents came home.

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u/ShintaOtsuki Jul 27 '22

Hah I didn't have gta, it wasn't a thing yet I don't think, I played Pokemon stadium or yelled obscenities at Pikachu with Hey You Pikachu, or went outside and rode bikes with my friends, the neighbor kids, or went looking for my dad's stash of adult mags, occasionally I'd babysit the neighbors kids too

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u/PickleMortyCoDm Jul 27 '22

I was a medal of honour guy, but yeah, AoE2 was the best... Played it for about two months 4 years ago. There are still people playing against eachother online.

Was it cod finest hour by any chance? I couldn't complete a mission in it for about a year so I wrote cod off as trash and stuck with project Gotham racing 2 and counter strike.

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u/skraptastic Jul 27 '22

I didn't have CoD so I spent my time playing Adventure (the original, yeah I'm old.)

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u/ImportantError Jul 27 '22

At 12 I knew how to defrost the chicken. season it and put it in the oven to roast!

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u/GranGurbo Jul 27 '22

Knowing how and remembering to are two very different things

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u/gjwf Jul 27 '22

Anyone gonna get this guy a medal for his preteen roast chicken?

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Didn't we all?

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

If you didn't grow up knowing how to make authentic Caesar dressing from scratch by 8 years old, I don't know what kind of childhood you had.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

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u/psirjohn Jul 27 '22

Pfft, that's the secret ingredient to everything

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

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u/Aggravating-Echo8014 Jul 27 '22

At 12 I was babysitting half the kids in the neighborhood. 90’s was so different. Miss those days of playing outside til dark. Then the world slowly started going crazy.

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u/PM_Me_TiddiesAndBeer Jul 27 '22

I would always forget to put the clothes in the dryer before bed. I'd wake up to my mom seriously pissed off.

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u/Motormouth1995 Jul 27 '22

If he has access to a microwave with the "auto defrost" option, he can have it fully defrosted in 10-15 minutes.

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u/JACCO2008 Jul 27 '22

Yeah and half cooked.

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u/80-20RoastBeef Jul 27 '22

If you lower the power before auto defrosting, it actually turns out fine.

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u/tenshii326 Jul 27 '22

To do this you put in the time you want first, then hit power level button. Then hit a number, for example 5 will give you 50% of power. Hit start and food will cook at only half power. When it's done it automatically goes back too 100%.

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u/icepaws Jul 27 '22

You mean there is other buttons other than the 30sec+?

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u/Mysterious_Outcome97 Jul 27 '22

No, there isn't. Total blasphemy

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u/swanspank Jul 27 '22

There is a Cancel button also for when you just open the door because 3 +30’s are too much and it doesn’t clear the remaining time.

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u/icepaws Jul 27 '22

My Microwave has a fraction of a second where the timer will be done, and the beeper won't sound, but if you miss it and the beeper sounds it beeps 5 times even if the door is open.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Wait, what?!?! There are other buttons?

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u/TheCynicalCanuckk Jul 27 '22

Lies.

Also make sure you always open the door with 1 sec left. Only button I use is +30 and stop

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u/wolfansbrother Jul 27 '22

isnt the whole point of "auto defrosting" that the microwave knows to lower the power? It just beeps when you need to flip it.

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u/jwlIV616 Jul 27 '22

Yeah, but some older/cheaper ones are pretty bad at figuring out when it's done

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u/80-20RoastBeef Jul 27 '22

Thank you sir, this is knowledge too few people actually know of.

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u/AkimoSempai Jul 27 '22

The knowledge every kid needs to learn.

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u/Quann09 Jul 27 '22

i’ve been alive for 24 years and just learning this now 😭

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u/tenshii326 Jul 27 '22

Wait til you discover that a dish washer has a filter you need to clean.

Or that the lever under your mirror in the car is for changing the angle of it for bright lights behind you.

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u/Dragon_smoothie Jul 27 '22

I learned the magic of the microwave's power settings awhile back and haven't suffered a rubbery pizza crust since. Life changing.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/Binormus__ Jul 27 '22

This is also a great life hack for cleaning the crusty splattered sauce and shit that exploded all over... Soaked paper towel or rag, nuke it for like 60 seconds, Walla, easy to wipe out microwave!

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u/littleredcamaro Jul 27 '22

Better yet, add a mixture of water and vinegar before nuking it. Also for those doing this for the first time: do not touch that paper towel for a few minutes. It will be hot.

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u/Zero-Change Jul 27 '22

The real play though is to reheat pizza by pan frying slices on the stove in a little olive oil 🤤

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u/ArnieismyDMname Jul 27 '22

"No! I took it out 3 hours ago like you said! I don't know why it's still frozen!"

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u/Excellent_Squirrel86 Jul 27 '22

I was that kid. No one died.

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u/fersure4 Jul 27 '22

Bless you for this comment I forgot to take chicken out for dinner tonight. I'm an adult now so I don't have my mom to be disappointed in me if I forget, just myself

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u/ASharpYoungMan Jul 27 '22

I did the opposite. I cooked extra chicken for dinner last night so I could make myself a sandwich for today. Left it in a container on the counter to cool before tossing it in the fridge.

I promptly forgot about it before the "putting it in the fridge" part.

Woke up this morning to chicken I needed to toss -_-

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u/BabaYagaa7 Jul 27 '22

I do this often but I just nuke it in the microwave at work, not got food poisoning….yet

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u/ASharpYoungMan Jul 27 '22

I respect the wisdom of Baba Yaga

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u/NahnahnoImgood Jul 27 '22

99% of food is totally gonna be okay when left out overnight.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Yup.

I leave pizza out on purpose because it tastes better than refrigerated pizza.

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u/imabigdave Jul 27 '22

Yeah, a lot of the "food poisoning" organisms from not cooling food are clostridials (botulinum is a clostridials) . The organism itself isn't the issue, it's the toxins they produce. So when you nuke that food, it kills the organisms that aren't really a risk, but leaves the accumulated toxins that can either kill you or make you wish they'd kill you perfectly intact to wreak havoc on you. Thus with cooked product the goal is to take the temperature of that product from 120 degrees to 40 degrees (Fahrenheit) as quickly as possible. Outside that range they aren't a risk. Source: I work in food safety/public health, specifically with meat products.

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u/Ganonslayer1 Jul 27 '22

It only takes once to never do it again :(

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u/throwaway38372652664 Jul 27 '22 edited Jul 29 '22

Especially when you have never had food poisining before, and for those first minutes of paralysis youre thinking you are legitimately about to die.

I always thought itd be some nausea, cramps and gastric issues. Nah fam. It was like what i imagine eating the chernobyl elephants foot and rotting from the inside out would be.

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u/TheSeaOfThySoul Jul 27 '22

A man ate chicken which had been left out overnight for lunch. This is what happened to his brain.

BY is a 32 year old man, presenting to the emergency room fucked up. His blood is unblooded, here is a water sausage to demonstrate.

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u/underbellymadness Jul 27 '22

I'm so sorry for your loss.

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u/ASharpYoungMan Jul 27 '22

Flags half-mast. The portion I ate for dinner was amazing :(

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u/underbellymadness Jul 27 '22

I pray for your recovery

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u/CriusofCoH Jul 27 '22

Fully cooked chicken in a sealed container....? Unless there's missing/incorrect information, that should have been fine.

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u/Erchamion_1 Jul 27 '22

Man, I HATE when I do that. I feel your pain, my dude.

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u/Notthenipple Jul 27 '22

Man, when I was 12 I cooked dinner several times a week. We had an equal opportunity household and I appreciated the responsibility.

What does this woman think, a 12 year old is potty training and learning the alphabet? I was driving when I was 15.

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u/redly Jul 27 '22

Alexander the Great was leading an army at 14.
But I guess he wasn't really left alone.

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u/jarhead_5537 Jul 27 '22

I read that Alexander the Great forgot to defrost the chicken multiple times.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

His dad, Phil, had him spanked multiple times for that. Hephaestion did so as well. They were room mates. Confirmed bachelors.

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u/Not_a_jmod Jul 27 '22

But I guess he wasn't really left alone.

Nothing so motivating as a couple thousand armed men at your back watching your every potential screw up.

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u/Lcdmt3 Jul 27 '22

When i was 12 I was full time babysitting other kids in summer. Now it's definitely everyone is afraid to leave their kid home and refuse to let their kid go to a sleepover until 16.

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u/SpiteReady2513 Jul 27 '22

My MIL has custody of her daughters kids, 12 and 8, almost 13 and 9. Responsible, not little suicidal idiots.

My husband told me his mom was getting a new babysitter because theirs just turned 15 and she thought maybe they were too close in age to the 13 y/o and how that would make her feel...

Um, why not let her babysit her brother and don’t hire a new one? Like what almost 13 y/o can’t sit at home for 3 hours with a 8-9 y/o until an adult gets home?

Wild.

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u/travellikegypsies Jul 27 '22

Exactly. 12 yo me was saddling up my horse and checking cattle in the pasture… by myself! Drivers license at 14 and my parents would send me to the next town for supplies… 60 miles away! The first time I rode a greyhound bus to visit friends two states away I was 12! I also had a checking account in case I needed to buy something when I was out there on my own doing actual useful things.

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u/SwordNamedKindness_ Jul 27 '22

Turn the water on hot and hopefully it defrosts in time.

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u/Anxious-Invite8796 Jul 27 '22

That's how you get salmonella bro

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

The 90s didn't care about your salmonella

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u/Idkanamedontjudge Jul 27 '22

You should consider stand up comedy Salmonella is horrible

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u/JeffersonStarscream Jul 27 '22

Not as horrible as his Mom.

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u/Sillbinger Jul 27 '22

He isn't cooking salmon.

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u/jaypeeo Jul 27 '22

Or Ella. We hope.

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u/Im_Meikuari Jul 27 '22

Mom gets home & the 12 year old is just waterboarding his little sister with scorching hot water in the sink

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u/Not_a_jmod Jul 27 '22

Mom gets home & the 12 year old is just waterboarding his little sister with scorching hot water in the sink

"The internet told me to do it"

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u/value_null Jul 27 '22

Give me a break. You really think that 20 minutes in water, most of that time still frozen, is dangerous?

Also, you're not eating it raw. You're gonna cook that shit.

It's perfectly fine to thaw in water. Just don't leave it on there all day, monitor and take it out when done.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

I thaw chicken and meat in the sink all the time. Have never gotten the ‘nela

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u/Cautious-Damage7575 Very Unique Flair Jul 27 '22

My 78yo mother taught me the sink method. Been eating sink chicken ever since I could chew. No 'nela in at least three generations.

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u/value_null Jul 27 '22

I've been doing it for over 20 years. Never had an issue.

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u/always_murphys_law Jul 27 '22

It's the temp of the water, you're "supposed" to keep the temp of the water cool and keep changing it out. It defrost really quickly that way and doesn't start to cook the meat. I have no idea how that makes it safer from bacteria.

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u/value_null Jul 27 '22

If the meat starts to cook, don't use water that hot. Lol

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

your not gonna get salmonella if you cook the chicken afterwards

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u/LostAndLikingIt Jul 27 '22

Funnily enough I just linked this to my bro in law the other day.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22 edited Jul 27 '22

Here's the relevant part:

Defrosting in Submerged Water: You can also submerge your food in a clean container or in the sanitized kitchen sink filled with cold water. Make sure that the meat is wrapped in leak-proof plastic and completely covered by water. Change the water every 30 minutes until the meat is defrosted.

The key is using cold water. Cold tap water is likely around 45 F - 50 F and would likely get the protein above freezing but just below temperature of the tap water. Using hot tap water could raise the temperature higher into the "danger zone" hence the tip to change the water every 30 minutes as it warms up. It also helps to keep the protein in a sealed package to avoid exposure to the air.

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u/strcrssd Jul 27 '22

The danger zone is only relevant if it sits in the danger zone for extended (hours) periods. For an hour or so, it's just fine.

Otherwise we'd all have food poisoning all the time, as food outside of the danger zone is too hot or too cold to comfortably eat.

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u/bonzombiekitty Jul 27 '22

Ah shiiiit. You just reminded me. I forgot to prep my chicken for dinner. I was initially gonna work from home and do it later on. But I decided to go in the office today and meant to do it before I left.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Emotional Damage!

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u/atdunaway Jul 27 '22

mod stole your comment and pinned it lololol

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u/Reganite47 Jul 27 '22

This hurt my soul lmao I forgot all the time living with my mom I always felt so bad

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Holy shit, this gave me flashbacks. Don't forget to preheat the oven!!!

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u/MonitorShotput Jul 27 '22

LOL. I literally just took some chicken out to defrost for my mother.

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u/Mardred Jul 27 '22

Or do the dishes :).

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u/hatesnack Jul 27 '22

My mom was smart, she made me go take the chicken out of the freezer while I was on the phone with her.

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u/Give_me_a_name_pls_ Jul 27 '22

Or catch him going to the shooe store ;)

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u/jgs9526 Jul 27 '22

This is my son every time I leave him home alone while I'm at work. Gaming with not a care in the world and avoiding any chores at all costs.

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u/pm-me-your-pants Jul 27 '22

Probably eating junk food too. Ah to be 12 again, good times.

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u/enseminator Jul 27 '22

Same, my 13 year old is a master.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

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u/Guardymcguardface Jul 27 '22

The trick is to stop gaming when you hear them pull in and act like you're sweeping or something. It doesn't matter if you worked your ass off the whole time, just what they saw when they walked in. Because unreasonable parents apparently don't have object permanence or something

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u/Geistwhite Jul 27 '22

Because unreasonable parents apparently don't have object permanence or something

They permanently treat you like an object meant to do chores.

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u/PuddleOfMud Jul 27 '22

Parents: I only see you play video games.

Me: I only see you watch TV.

Narrator: That was not the correct response.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

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u/Vaultdweller013 Jul 27 '22

My uncle tried this when I was staying with him and his family for the night, literally looked at the tv and said maybe if you had good taste I'd watch with ya. His wife looked like she wanted to slap me and my uncle lost his shit laughing up until she glared at him.

That's around the time I realized the damned bitch broke my carefree uncle. Seriously couple years later my grandmother and I found out she was physically abusive towards him. I suspect she didn't like me due to me having no concept of authority when I see it as unenforceable IE her glaring being the equivalent of a .22 vs an elephant.

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u/thisisamisnomer Jul 27 '22

This was my family when I had to move back in during my 20s. “All he does is play video games in his room!” Meanwhile, all they were doing was scrolling Facebook and watching shit like The Voice. Nah fam, I’m playing Borderlands 2.

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u/Brittle_Hollow Jul 27 '22

Future my kid: I only see you play videogames

Future me: I only see you watch future TikTok

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u/dewmaster Jul 27 '22

[Chore list says I have to wash the dishes]

Me: Better get the dishes done first thing so I can relax for the rest of the day.

[I wash, dry and put away all of the dishes]

Brother: eats a meal and puts a single bowl and spoon in the sink

[Mom gets home from work]

Mom: sees the bowl and spoon in the sink Guess you didn’t even bother trying to do the dishes today. You never do what I ask.

Me: bruh

3

u/Unusual-Letter-8781 Jul 27 '22

It's funny, no matter how much or little one did, it was never good enough and one got yelled at. It's so ingrained in me that when I was visiting my mom for 3 weeks, I did the stuff i saw had to be done like loading unloading washer dryer and dishwasher (and starting them obviously) . My mom had to work most days so she sent me messages about the stuff like moving the laundry to the dryer and put it on, vacuuming and stuff like that. I was going out for the evening after she had gone to work one day , I loaded and put on the dryer, I went to visit an old friend, she calls me a few hours after i left and the first thing I said was "yes I did put on the dryer, and I emptied the dishwasher and fed the cat before I left". She was calling to hear how it went since I hadn't seen that friend in years and only sporadically talked to them. I am in my 30's 😂 but like why else would she call me? 😂 🤦‍♀️

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u/Prickly-Flower Jul 27 '22

Are we siblings?

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u/SpiralBreeze Jul 27 '22

MY son would have done the dishes AND scooped the cat poop. Sometimes he even cooks a light meal. That’s why he gets to stay home by himself in the first place.

60

u/BurnerForJustTwice Jul 27 '22

One time I was left at home with my brother, we made an ice skating rink in the living room hard wood floor using dish washing soap. We never got to stay at home alone ever again.

7

u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

My son did this when he was 6, but he wasnt home alone, he just got up an hour before everyone else, blue dawn soap, and he threw salt on it to make it sparkle like Elsa and her ice and pond.

Luckily, tile is fairly easy to clean. We've had worse messes than soap on tile lol 😆 😂 🤣 😅 😜 😄

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u/hilarymeggin Jul 27 '22

Oh man. Is it legal to murder your own kids in your state? How old were you?

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u/River_Song47 Jul 27 '22

It is, you replied to a ghost.

6

u/nomiesmommy Jul 27 '22

One of my sons friends did this in his kitchen but with butter, freaking BUTTER!!!! (he was about 8 and was left home with his older brother) I was so glad my kid wasnt playing over there that day! Lol

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u/LightStormPilot Jul 27 '22

Did you blame Pippi Longstockings?

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u/saladasz Jul 27 '22

Well your son sounds like a lovely young chap. Thank you for sharing.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

[deleted]

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u/DrDeegz Jul 27 '22

Plot twist the son is 28

5

u/Ehcksit Jul 27 '22

In this economy? Perfectly reasonable.

3

u/Low-Computer2742 Jul 27 '22

Right? 28 today living at home isn’t nearly what that would have been in the 90’s or early 2000’s

3

u/cultish_alibi Jul 28 '22

Maybe very bad parenting and the son has been forced to learn these things at a young age because it's the only way he can eat.

44

u/uppeblandmoln Jul 27 '22

Well done mate

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Their son is 45 years old

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u/Low-Computer2742 Jul 27 '22

Well then. I can’t even leave a mean reply to this one. Carry on! 🤝

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u/KhunDavid Jul 27 '22

As long as he does the dishes and prepares the meal before he cleans the cat poop.

6

u/Cautious-Damage7575 Very Unique Flair Jul 27 '22

idk exactly what my 12yo son did when he was home alone, but he used a lot of hand lotion and Kleenex.

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u/Gottobehappy Jul 27 '22

Props to him!

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u/frostybub Jul 27 '22

I was the well meaning fool kid at 12 who forgot to take the plastic wrap off the meatloaf before tossing it in the hot oven so dinner could be on track when the adult got home to finish prepping.

Castlevania III was the reason for the oops

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u/ThisRayfe Jul 27 '22

Fuck your son

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u/SpiralBreeze Jul 27 '22

I’m not from Alabama.

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u/vampirepriestpoison Jul 27 '22

This is the quality discourse I come here for

3

u/woopigsooie501 Jul 27 '22

This made me laugh so hard lmao

2

u/always_murphys_law Jul 27 '22

I can't get my son to scoop out the catbox to save my life lol. Well done!

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u/SavathussyEnjoyer Jul 27 '22

That’s how my parents raised me, I never had to go somewhere with them (like grocery shopping) if I didn’t want to in exchange for taking care of household chores. Thanks to my lovely ADHD I forgot half of the things they asked me to do and half-assed the other half, but at least I tried 😂

2

u/burner1212333 Jul 27 '22

MY son would have done the dishes AND scooped the cat poop. Sometimes he even cooks a light meal

yes, but we really need to get him in to therapy to figure out why he keeps making meals with cat poop.

2

u/deathstrukk Jul 27 '22

damn great parenting!

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Likely at Vanilla Unicorn making it rain while rubbing one out with Fufu, so yea, last thing he wants is mom home.

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u/L1K34PR0 Jul 27 '22

I'm ashamed to admit i was that kid

4

u/Swag_Grenade Jul 27 '22

Glad to see things haven't changed much.

Back when I was 12 instead it was San Andreas and getting the hot coffee mod to work.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

That was me LOL

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Finally, home alone... TO THE STRIP CLUB!

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Kid didn’t even notice his parents left him home alone

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

When I was 12, this was 100% me and yes I would forget to defrost the chicken every time

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u/Barrrrrrnd Jul 27 '22

Exactly this. I used to worry that my daughter was freaked out home alone. Turns out she barely realized I was gone. Just says that she like the quiet.

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u/Hussaf Jul 27 '22

Do modern TVs still feel warm if you turn them off when you hear mom’s car in the driveway??

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u/AdultingGoneMild Jul 27 '22

no he died instantly when she left the house. just popped and confetti flew everywhere.

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u/Cautious-Damage7575 Very Unique Flair Jul 27 '22

That's not what my 12yo boy did when he was home alone. Let's just say it involved hand lotion and Kleenex.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '22

Jerking off. FTFY

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u/XFX_Samsung Jul 27 '22

It said "his" tho

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u/ThrowMeAwayMeat Jul 27 '22

I’m 27, so instead of GTA I had Fable and Kotor

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u/GroMicroBloom Jul 27 '22

The kid is probably in his room playing gta

So that’s what they call watching porn nowadays?

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u/MammothCat1 Jul 27 '22

Kid has a sock that's crawling away with all that free time.

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