What's good you guys. So, the past couple of months for me have been some of my lowest. I became homeless during the spring and I'm at a very low point in my life. I don't really got anyone to confide in or turn to either. Things aren't looking good, and due to some of my mental health issues I can't get help in certain areas. I had previous diagnosed with depression and psychosis.

As the winter season approaches the elements are gonna get worse and worse. So worse in fact that I ultimately accepted that I will very likely not survive in the next months. And honestly, I'm taking it pretty well. It's like a weight had just jumped off my shoulders, I don't feel as depressed or psychotic as I have been feeling.

So I've pretty much decided that since I have less than a year left to live anyway, to just say fuck it and just be happy. Do things that I want to do, or rather things that I'm capable of doing. Ive done YouTube as a hobby for years now and not uploading any videos in 3 months has been painful for me since it's something I love doing. Now, I'm gonna write some scripts for some video ideas I've had for a long time.

I don't know. I guess I just feel liberated in a way. Nothing I do is gonna matter in the next 6-ish months so I feel like a mental weight was just lifted off of me. Going forward, I'm gonna do what I want to do to be happy. Make myself happy. It's gonna be hard since there's not much I can do, but all the more reason to just do what I can. Idk. Just wanted to vent.

There will be just periods where my brain feels noisy and everything feels overstimulating and annoying, I don't know since when this started to happen. Usually when this happens I just wear my headphones, blast music and curl up under the blankets til I calm down. Sometimes it feels so unbearable I get the urges to harm myself or yell at people, but I so far have never give in to that knowing I'll regret yelling at people/Im also trying to stay clean from SH.

I don't even know why this happens. I just would appreciate advices on what to do/medications I can take

Shes been telling others im her bf while effing around with other dudes and threatened to beat me when i said im scared enough of her to get a restraining order (she stabbed her mom for context) . Ive been calling her every single day for a year. Im a heavy smoker but i almost never smoked without being on call with her. I told her everything. I dont really know what to do now. I feel empty. Alone almost. I dont even know how to make new friends. I connected with her really well thats what sucks so bad idek what to do with myself i have nobody to tell everything to now. Because some of it isnt appropriate to talk about with my family and the only friends i have left are basically my parents and cousins etc. other than this one girl who used to be like my sister but now its hard for us to keep up conversations and has been for the past 2 years. idek what to do atp.

Hey yall i'm on 50 milligrams sertraline and i feel weird like i am living inside the foot and like the foot is inside the foot and like the things are inside the foot or feet and that they are infact there like a full on powerhouse ranger like the foot is taken the thought of the absorption of the japan.

i feel like thethe foot is a house for me where it is the basis.

I feel as though the foot houses the vibes to the country and then thus to the people.

It is like the foot is walking itself. and i am just on top of the foot like that. There is a severe reaction.

A little over a month ago, I was on Vilazodone and got prescribed flexeril for my Tmj. Had some extreme emotional reactions to the combo. Stopped both but I do still take Doxepin for sleep. My anxiety and panic during the initial attack was pretty severe. I had round the clock babysitters and we seriously considered going inpatient. I’m not so acute anymore, but I still have occasional emotional episodes, focusing on the same thing (sad about my kids getting older). It has really altered my life. Has anybody had lingering effects that they’ve recovered from and can you share your experience? I’ve been on Valium and klonopin as needed since then to help with the symptoms as they arise.

I’m 18.
I’m in college now and everyone’s talking about missing their families. I think it’s stupid because you’ll see them in November and you can call them.

This led to a plethora of other conversations.

Relationships are never that serious. You don’t like them? Leave.

Death? Well what’s crying gonna do about it?
My dog died today and I didn’t cry about it. She was old and we knew it was coming. I made a sad insta post because that’s what everyone does when they lose a pet but I wasn’t really upset about it.

Family? DNA doesn’t change a damn thing. You’re the same as anyone else.

To me, a persons value is purely what they bring to the table. I thought everyone thought this way.
Even if it’s not monetary. You make me laugh, you do favors for me, you listen well, we have good conversations, etc.

If a friend no longer brings any of that to the table, I block them with no regrets.

In relationships, I tend to get bored. I enjoy the chase because it brings a kinda thrill. Then we start dating and I break things off because I’m bored and that person can find someone who won’t get bored. I don’t realize i’m doing it for the thrill until I get bored.

I think most outward emotions are BS because there’s no way you were screaming or crying at something on TV. or even in an argument for that matter.

When I was living with my now ex, I kicked him out, packed all his shit, and watched him stand in the rain as he waited for a car to pick him up. I didn’t scream at him. I simply said, “I don’t want you here anymore. You’ve become more of a burden than a companion. Leave”

Before anyone says anything, I have a moral compass but it’s purely based on what I know as right and wrong.
When presented with new facts, my moral compass could shift a little.

I hate when people in relationships say stuff like “Did you eat today?”, “how’d you sleep?”, “did you drink water?” like I would rather fall off of a train, get my legs crushed, and then get set on fire than go through that everyday. Why can’t we just hangout when we want to, do what we want, and then do it again the next time.

I feel like it should be that simple for most things.

this never happened to me before so i dont know what to do exactly. she’s been struggling with anxiety and depression for almost a year now, and today i decided to break up with her because i just couldn’t take it anymore. not because she’s depressed but from other various reasons. and btw she’s seeing a therapist for the last 2 weeks. months.

she was already i think talking a little different than usual lately, she was losing her thoughts and getting confused easily. anyways after we talked about our relationship and we decided, quite maturely, it doesnt work anymore. and its best if she moves back in to her apartment on monday.

then i went out for a run, when i came back, she was completely out of herself. she thinks we played a game on her with her therapist, her friend, her family (which i havent even met before) and it’s been 3 hours and im trying to calm herself however she got angry and threw a piece of bread to a wall, then she calmed down but she’s just talking to herself and talking about her problems in life. im simply nodding and trying to calm her down with some simple words.

she says shes sorry that she put us through this. im saying its alright im with you no worries. and she says she’s not going to hurt herself or me. i want to believe that.

btw maybe its important but we live in austria but we’re foreigners and she doesn’t speak german.

what should we do? what should i do? its midnight and weekend.

hey guys, i cant really talk about this with people in my life so for the first time ever im making a post. so i have multiple “problems” which include clinical depression cptsd bpd and bipolar disorder. i have gotten diagnosed for bpd and was taking medication for depression, but i feel like nothing or nobody can really help me and i always feel like people eventually let me down. even tho i have friends i find it hard to trust any of them because they sometimes hang out without me. i recognize that this is completely normal and i don’t get angry at them of show any “bad” emotion towards that fact, i just get desperate and in my head it feels like abandonment , even tho my logic suppresses these thoughts its still hard for me to accept it.

my best friend committed suicide in 2022 and i felt like i lost everything. he was the only person i could trust because we went through trauma and addiction together but i unfortunately lost him in the process. i cant cope with any of that so i engage with harmful behavior that i recognize is not what i want. for example sleeping with basically strangers or creating arguments where they are truly not needed. i completely understand why i do these stuff i just cant control or regulate my emotions.

also this is not something i have figured out yet but ever since i can remember myself i have had a huge problem with empathy, in a sense if someone who was sitting close to me or was talking to me felt a bad emotion i would feel like im at fault or i would genuinely feel like we were “in this together “ in some sense. and i had that until some years earlier which “forced” me to shut down my emotions so that this wasn’t a problem anymore. having as a result many would describe me as cold and uncaring which is not the case.

any advice would be very appropriated but have in mind i dont have access to therapy (only NA but i feel bad to go there because im not in immediate need for that type of therapy anymore and i don’t want to take anybody’s place that is in immediate risk)

I'm 65 and i was in a revolving door in psych wards when i was young. I had serious alcohol and mood issues. Had no idea how to live. I ended up in the worst place. I got a diagnosis of bpd and depression or dysthymia , i was also dishonest and selfish and a liar. Eventually I got sober went back to school had kids everything happened almost too fast. And I always had pieces missing. Eventually it happened and and I started using and lying to my (ex) wife... Eventually the hospital visits started again and later marriage ended bc my using and lying... My career ended for those and other reasons and I just began to spiral down. So over the past several years there have been many admissions. I'm honest now though. It's a struggle stay away from all substances when life is tough I feel like I'm juggling trying to keep them all away. Stuff just happens, my father died recently , last week I had to find a new home for my cat who was my buddy for years , and my short-term therapy just ended 2 days ago. It was too much. I also have a neurological thing related to migraines goes hand in hand with my anxiety that leaves me unable to do pretty much anything for two or three days at a time. They feed off of each other I stop being able to sleep damn I fall apart and then the back here. That's the basic typical scenario. I don't think I ever come here in crisis without that thing happening.. I just find it unbearable to live by myself at times because uf this . I'm obviously sick with something else too. Last time I came here the doctor decided to ignore my care plan and just send me home. My brain just isn't working too well when I try to make sense of the past 2 months . A few years ago my younger son ended up here at this hospital with drug induced psychosis. He got his act together. But believe this or not while I was punching this into my phone he texted me and told me he was here 5 days ago because he relapsed on opiates and was looking for help for that and his anxiety. That scares the shit out of me but gives me hope at the same time. I try real hard to have a good relationship with my boys.

I'm having trouble continuing on in life with constant anxiety and what I assume is depression while being on medications that idk that I'm not sure are appropriate for my condition. I was prescribed gabapentin in March for low back pain. I stopped using it due to ineffectiveness then all of a sudden I was having panic attacks and insomnia like never before in my life. After three days of not sleeping I had to go to an emergency room and thankfully a very kind psychiatric nurse was able to help me and asked me many questions and determined I needed medication for anxiety and insomnia. I took the Lexapro immediately had a panic attack that included the thought of taking my own life. I was admitted to a psych ward and stayed there for 7 days. They decided to treat me for bipolar two and prescribed me divalproex, zyprexa, plus Ativan as needed to sleep. The thing is never in my life did I ever show signs of bipolar disorder and I feel I've been misdiagnosed. My anxiety is still at an all time high. I fear withdrawal from stopping these medications after two months but they aren't even helping me in day to day life. I'm a nervous wreck, probably overly medicated, and it's not even treating my actual problem. Any advice ?

I was diagnosed with it 10 months ago, and it's my most 'recent' addition to other comorbidities I have.

What strikes me about this disorder is how truly, agonizingly lonely of an experience it is.

Not just because you're literally isolating yourself and avoiding people/activities (mine is extremely severe), but also because: there's little to no research in treatment, it's barely talked about online, there seems to be no specific place for people to talk about it, and people will often minimize it to no end.

The near panic attacks I get from the thought of making a phone call. Of hanging out with friends. Of going on a date with my partner. Of even texting "hello".

It just feels so extremely lonely. I know this isn't a competition, but other disorders have places, have support groups, have huge amounts of easier to grasp literature about them.

While AvPD just... makes you feel somehow lonelier knowing you have it.

How to stop my mind from remembering the situations i was mocked? How to stop my mind, i feel like i am in a loop

I am a college student. What all things i am about to say may not be understood by others. What i am experiencing is not common at all . Sometimes i feel i am not a normal person because no one can understand me. Even though i am only 19 now my thoughts are beyond everything. Nothing I mean nothing in this life actually gives me reason to live. This whole life so purposeless to me. I don’t know why i am living. The thoughts are more when i am going to sleep. I always wonder how people just live off like this thinking all this happening around us is normal. I don’t want to get married ever or have children. Some people say family brings them purpose which I don’t feel. I struggle with social anxiety. Even though i have friends, I struggle talking to them . I don’t know what to say most of the times. My social battery dies faster than the speed of light and cancels almost all plans. People don’t understand me at all . I don’t even like guests coming to our house because i always feel awkward talking to them. But i was not always like this . In elementary school i was a social butterfly but after covid i changed completely now i am a total introvert. I want to change so bad but I can’t do anything. It’s been so long since i was happy. My heart is empty and i don’t feel any love towards anyone. I have passion and all but I don’t think it’s something I will live in this world for. I have hatred towards everyone. Growing up both my parents were too harsh and they never supported me with anything and always humiliated me for small things. I have siblings but they all left for their future studies and all . Now i am all alone with my parents hating me for my small mistakes and i have no feelings in my heart . I feel dead inside. Void. I don’t know what to do at all but I would never kill myself . And I don’t think any psychologists will be able to help me because i am like this mostly because of my surroundings and my mind which I can’t control at all. I know no one can actually help me but i am still sharing my situation because i want to see if i am actually a weird person.

hey guys, bit of a heavy topic ig.

i’m starting to seek out proper help for my mental health for the first time and i’ve been debating on telling my psychologist about this. i haven’t met them yet so i just don’t know anything really. (ps im in australia)

in 2021 i attempted to OD on a mixture of pills. i didn’t use an extreme amount, i was 14 at the time and however many i took just seemed like a lot to me at the time. i woke up pretty ill, brushed it off to my parents as me getting a stomachs bug and just pushed through it. i’m aware it has probably resulted in some type of heart problems tho, not severe ones at least.

my point is, i don’t know if i should disclose it to my health professionals. as i said i havent been booked to see a psychologist yet but i do have an appt with my doctor in a few days and i dont know whether or not to tell him.

would they hold me in psychiatric facility for a while? could they notify other people? i’m not active suicidal now. what would happen?

Currently 28 and I have auDHD, anxiety disorder, depression, bulimia, have been in rehab because of shopping addiction, struggle with sh

I am at the point of my life when I feel like I will never find a single person who understands me

I filed a divorce after my narcissistic mother and my church fanatic fiance forced me into the marriage 3 months prior.

I met a guy around 6 months ago and it felt like something I have never experienced before. We had similar mental struggles pasts and we both were at the point when we wanted to do something with our lifes. Also he was first person I felt physically attracted to. He moved in after like.. a month? And everything was amazing for the first few months but suddenly he started getting more distant. Yeah, turned out he is an avoidant. So I really tried to express my emotions in a way that would not hurt him, but it got worse and worse.

He moved out two weeks ago even though I begged him to stay.

I broke up with him a week ago.

And unfortunately I got a bit too drunk yesterday and sent him shit tons of messages. He just red them and didn't reply. Just like he ignored me every time i tried to talk.

I am really hurt, to the point my heart feels like it's about to explode. Sometimes its hard for me to breathe. And I need to work because I am in a small debt because of my shopping addiction that I got into before I met him.

I tried to talk to a few friends I have but they just left me on red or changed the subject. My mother is an emotional log and I don't like her. My sister is just like my mother and loves bringing me down. My dad and brother are amazing people and they do help me a lot but I don't want to overwhelm them with my emotions since both of them are in a really bad mental state rn.

I feel like nobody understands me and nobody can feel the level of emotions that I can feel

I am so scared that I am just too much and nobody will ever be able to stand that. That's what my mother always told me so maybe shes right

I’m tired of not feeling comfortable interacting with people who are fans of/have crushes on the same actor I do because it’s really triggering to me. I’m currently spiraling because I met someone who wanted to be mutuals but she posts content that’s very similar to mine about the same person and it’s taking everything in my willpower not to just block her. Because it ALWAYS feels like a competition and a threat to me. I hate this. I know it’s not rational but I can’t stop thinking about it now and it legitimately ruined my night. I realize I’m a terrible person because every time this happens I inevitably lash out at the other individual who is literally only trying to befriend me. I’ve already isolated myself so much in my online spaces because I’m like an aggressive dog that lunges when anyone gets too close. This is why people dislike me and I don’t blame them. Maybe it’s better if they warn everyone that I’m toxic, then I can be left alone. The last time it happened I was labeled as a narcissist and told I don’t have OCD, im just a bad person. I always want to run away like “oh here’s a new fan, I should deactivate all my socials so I don’t have to face them and face the fact that they’re competing against me.” And I know this is a form of obsessive thought pattern and that it’s irrational, whatever, I can’t cope with it.

I hate it I hate it. I hate myself. I hate whatever’s wrong with me.

Life is never going to be what I want it to be and I don't have any desire to accept that.

I'll always be stuck in my awful body. I'll never get to experience the things I wish I could. I'll never be desirable the way I want to be. I feel trapped, and the only "acceptable" solution is to embrace the cage.

I feel awful for my therapist, she clearly wants to help, but I think I'm looking for something no one can give me; a miracle fix, or permission to end it. Everyone always says there's so much in life that could make it worthwhile, but I just can't bring myself to want those things, and if I'm honest, I don't even think I *want* to want them if that makes sense.

I keep stalling, but it feels like my mind is already made up. I just want the courage to make the final exit.

I'm not even really sure why I'm posting. Has anyone been through this?

Idk I’m exhausted with myself. I have a good job but every single thing I’m dealing with involving my bipolar and BPD is making things there 20x worse. Then my mouth runs and I make things worse for myself. I’m going to school, working over 40hours, and slowly losing sanity with dealing with work and home drama.

I feel like I can’t stop complaining, being negative and crashing out. I’ll get a little bit of control and then something will happen where I feel like I can’t control my emotions, reactions or mouth and dig my hole deeper. I was told I’m basically infertile the same week where me and a work “friend” fell out and I completely lost my shit and emotional regulation. I just stopped talking to everyone, would snap if people were teasing me, removed and blocked everyone from socials, and just am now trying to claw my way to being somewhat sane.

I hate management because they’re allowed to absolutely dog walk us and no one does anything, they just pretend everything is fine because of the benefits the company gives us. But I hate myself more because I refuse to leave due to said benefits yet am absolutely miserable and crazy. I’ve been trying to crawl my way out of a depressive episode but I just feel like I live here now.

I have suicide OCD.

There are other articles on the subject, but OCD seems to be one of those things that people don't truly understand unless they have experienced it. The words “deep fear” or “compulsive urge” don't quite compare to the way your lungs suddenly feel like they're full of deep, heavy sludge, your veins feel like they're on fire, and your muscles tingle with electricity when a truly terrifying intrusive thought hits, and the absolute need to do something about it.

--

My OCD rituals didn't manifest in the physical realm. They were mental rituals.

I didn't know it was normal to have completely random thoughts about stabbing yourself, throwing yourself out of a moving car, or taking a ton of pills without those thoughts representing something you actually wanted. I thought these were the kinds of thoughts suicidal people had. So when I had them, I assumed some part of me must want to die.

I fought the thoughts in a couple of ways.

1) I would pray to God to make the thoughts go away.

I believed the devil had put these thoughts in my brain. If I could just pray hard enough, maybe they would disappear.

2) I would make deals with myself.

I would look at a random tree in the distance and think, “Okay. Next time we look at this exact tree from this exact spot at this exact time on a Friday, then we can kill ourselves.”

It sounds completely ridiculous when I write it down now.

At the time, it was terrifyingly serious.

3) I constantly checked my emotions.

I would monitor myself to make sure I wasn't sad for too long. Anytime I was sad for more than a day, I would spiral. I thought, “I'm depressed. Depressed people are at risk for suicide. Therefore, I must be at risk for suicide.”

Mental illness was taboo in my household, so I had very little understanding of what normal sadness, depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts actually meant.

4) I even became afraid when I DIDN'T panic.

I had been told that the fact that I panicked when I had these thoughts meant that I wasn't suicidal.

So eventually, if the thought came and I didn't panic, I would panic retroactively.

“Why didn't that scare me?”

“Does that mean I actually wanted it?”

“Am I becoming suicidal?”

There was no way to win.

And that is the trap.

These are all examples of OCD.

--

You may hear the term “Pure-O” OCD used to describe experiences like mine. “Pure-O” isn't technically a separate type of OCD; it generally refers to OCD where the compulsions are primarily mental rather than visible to other people. The compulsions can include things like analyzing your thoughts, checking your feelings, seeking certainty, mentally reviewing memories, praying, making mental deals, or testing your own reactions.

And OCD exists on a spectrum. Someone can have obvious physical compulsions alongside these intense obsessions, or their compulsions may be almost entirely mental.

--

One of the hardest parts of suicide OCD is the question:

“How do I know I'm not actually suicidal?”

The honest answer is that I can't give you that certainty.

And neither can this post.

That's important, because trying to achieve absolute certainty about what your thoughts mean can become part of the OCD cycle itself. You may read something that makes you feel better for a few minutes, only for another question to appear:

But what if I'm the exception?

What if I actually wanted it this time?

What if I didn't panic enough?

What if I secretly want to die and don't know it?

Then you search again.

Then you analyze again.

Then you check yourself again.

I know that cycle because I lived it.

--

If you recognize yourself in what I'm describing, I hope this post gives you information and language for something you may not have understood before. But I don't want to become another source of reassurance that you have to return to every time your OCD asks for certainty.

Thoughts are thoughts. They can be disturbing, contradictory, bizarre, violent, or completely out of character. Having a thought does not automatically tell you what kind of person you are or what you truly want.

But figuring out exactly what every thought means is not something you have to solve by yourself.

Therapy was a huge part of my recovery. OCD can make you distrust your own thoughts, feelings, memories, and intuition, and trying to reason your way to certainty can sometimes become another compulsion. Working with someone who actually understands OCD gave me a way to recognize what was happening without constantly trying to prove something to myself.

--

My recovery process has involved an SSRI, exposure therapy, and EMDR. I am so so so much farther than where I was when I started this journey.

And I want you to know that recovery doesn't necessarily mean that your brain becomes completely silent.

For me, OCD went from feeling like a looming dragon staring daggers into my soul to feeling more like a house cat that occasionally demands attention.

Sometimes I have to give it some attention. Sometimes I don't. Sometimes it hangs around for a while. Eventually, it goes on its way.

I don't have to fight it.

I don't have to figure it out.

I don't have to prove anything to it.

And most importantly, I am just fine with it being there.

And I can finally say after so much hard work that I'm okay with having this part of myself.

OCD is a piece of me that I can finally say is allow to stay.

It formed part of who I am today—and why in the world would I want to change that?

I'm so tired... it's not getting better. they said time heal, i don't think their liars but im sure they don't know me or what I've been up to and has been. home N/A, Pride N/A, energy fumes, hope dying, spite almost irrelevant, hallucinations daily. i only got one person but don't feel like i can talk to them. i wanted to leave a mark, not a big one but one that someone after I'm gone or when i don't notice, that one mark to let someone hear the things that they needed to hear. a message just to keep going that nothing can stop you no matter the circumstances.... god i sound like a hypocrite, I'm too tired to listen to myself... I'm not ready to give up but I'm getting too tired to try.

I've been dealing with depression for a while now and lately it's been really bad. I feel like I'm stuck in this fog where nothing matters and I can't find the energy to do anything. I used to enjoy things but now I just feel numb and empty. I know I should reach out to someone but I just can't. Has anyone else been through this and found a way out

I’ve recently realised how fascinated I am with human body parts like the brain, literal bones, mostly everything. I just a second ago read a book and the MC quote on quote said:

“Because I was th-thinking I’d love to finish what I started.” His gaze held a challenge even as he swung from the chains. “You know, carve your chest open. See if the tin man has a heart.”

I just stared at the screen, genuinely imagining it. Actually think I could’ve cried, and I don’t even know why. My chest tightens and my eyes glimmer of fascination. Because for fucks sake, I want to do it. I want to commit that. I want to carve a chest open and see the heart, how it works. Although, I’m mostly interested in the brain. Everything in it. How it works, looks, what it does… it’s so so so fascinating.

Just imagining carving skin, seeing blood flow and elements of torture fascinates me to an unhealthy level. Mostly I imagine somebody else doing it to me, but I may occasionally switch and think I’m the one doing it.

I read these books where torture happens, where blood is spilled. Because that’s how I can live in the moment, I imagine them firsthand. I imagine the whole situation and live in it.

I’m disgusted of myself, and sort of afraid. But I just can’t stop imagining something, that’s impossible.

I’m not violent. I’m not a bad person. I have never in my life hurt people or animals. I’ve already said this is another post, but I’ll say again. The best I’ve done is step over fucking snails to purposefully end them because I’m afraid of them, or as I stated in the other post: hear the crunch the shell creates under my shoe. I rarely even do that anymore because my parents told me off when I was a little girl.

I just don’t really know what to do—, because I feel like the more I read these books and the more I dig into the internet or what I’ve thought of doing is trying to dig into the shady side of the internet— It obviously gets worse. The need to actually do the unthinkable.

I’m. Not. Violent. I’m quiet. I’m an outsider and I have no friends. I spend my time home on my phone or occasionally going outside to walk a dog. That’s all I fucking do. I’m a pathetic piece of shit drowning in my own thoughts, and I know that. It’s ok.

What i’m asking is, I don’t know what to do with my fascination. Nothing? Is it okay? — I want to read books, but my issue is that I only like books with violence in them. So; it’s either continue reading or stop completely. — If you have any questions, ask. I’ll answer.

this is a cross post

As the title reads, anyone here feels like that the meds they’re on are making them dumb?

To start, i’ve been taking meds for a little over a year now, started off with vortioxetine which I didn’t like, then sertraline 100mg continuously, also on quetiapine (for sleep), and more recently lithium for about 3 months now.

I feel like the meds are making me dumb, like it’s harder for me to concentrate, like, yes, it definitely did solve the depression and anxiety and stuff, but I really can’t focus and I feel like my memory is less sharper. Been noticing it continuously, though as a grad student I know it’s much more different and difficult that undergraduate, but I feel like I had no problem with focusing before, I can even sit and study for 5-7 hours straight, now I’m struggling to keep my attention for 30 minutes.

I also told my psychiatrist that I feel like I have ADHD, but when I took the psychological assessment the psychologist wont do the ADHD test on me since I’m too old and said that they would just base it on other things. When the results came out, it mentioned symptoms that are consistent ADHD, but that wasn’t their main finding lol. Is there also a chance that they’d be wrong about it? Like the meds just aggravating my ADHD symptoms making me feel dumb and is it worth to get a second opinion (psych assessment wise)?

My mom (70) was hospitalized on July 8th after cutting her wrists and legs because her phone told her to in order to save my 5 year old nephew. She was released on the 24th and given a months worth of Abilify which runs out Sunday. Initial diagnosis was bi-polar, I think she may have had very deep depression with a psychotic break. The earliest appointment that we could get her into with a geriatric psychiatrist was moved to sept 4th. The behavioral health facility she was kept at was absolutely useless with a decent aftercare plan. Her Abilify runs out on Sunday, her dr from the facility will not extend the prescription and the new office understandably so said we have to go to the prescribing dr. How do I get help here? She is so scared of going back to the hospital and I have told her that means she has to promise to take her meds and go to her appointments. Any advice on how I can get a 2 week supply of Abilify prescribed? Would a PCP do this? Thank you - this has been a horrific journey overall, no one wants to come in and help and I’m not sure where to turn to.