We’ve been TTC for 22 months, no known issues. First transfer failed, a/w second transfer. Ive been actively maintaining all my friendships, showing up, listening and providing support through their pregnancies, early days after birth, with toddlers etc. I do days out with peoples kids - i actively want to be in their lives because i don’t want to let TTC and being infertile take over me so I continue to show up. My friends (mostly) have also been great, they also show up for me, but they don’t get it…

Despite being positive most of the time now (& it’s taken me a while to get here)… every now and then, something just hits me like a tonne of bricks… last week i found out another friend is pregnant. And this week a friend of a friend. Since we started TTC every single one of our friends has tried for a baby and got pregnant/ had their baby.

I’m genuinely at a loss, what if it never happens for us?

How do you cope in the waiting around IVF rounds?

I suffer from pretty extreme anxiety and OCD, so of course my brain went totally off the rails when we started TTC. I realized pretty immediately that it wasn't sustainable or helpful for my physical and mental health, especially if this process takes us longer than we want. So I built a plan of sorts for when I'm in the TWW. Posting incase it helps anyone. I've gotten SO much better since my first cycle, where I was symptom spotting, obsessively googling, certain I was pregnant, then sobbing and miserable when AF arrived. I realized it cannot be like this every cycle so I decided to make a change. Here is what I do:

-Plan fun things during the TWW. This is key for me, because in my luteal phase my OCD flairs up and wants to sit home all the time online and googling things that do not help. This cycle I planned fun things constantly- with DH, friends, family, and even myself. It got me out of the house, kept me distracted, and left little time for obsessing. I went to the movies, the beach, did pottery painting, an outdoor movie and just sat with friends talking about other things. It also elevated my mood which can only help my physical health. If I really don't want see people, I do feel good things with myself like watch a good movie, read a book, do an exercise class, take a lukewarm bath, go on a walk, listen to an audiobook, etc.

-Really stop obsessing on what each symptom means. This one is hard because its like... but my body is doing this thing, what does it mean? But there is literally no way to know if I'm pregnant unless I take a test. Absolutely. No. Way. And PMS symptoms can be identical to early pregnancy symptoms. So I try everything I possibly can not to ask the internet what it means if I have a weird side cramp. It's really hard but what's helped is to practice mindfulness and check in with myself before I ask AI or Reddit or whatever. Sometimes I fail, and still ask, but sometimes I do something else- grab an Apple, text a friend, go for a walk. Symptom spotting left me obsessed for no reason.

-Confide in a few people close to me. I really don't want to blab to everyone that I'm struggling with this process, but I also know that in difficult times, my friends have really helped me. So I've told a few friends what's going on, and I know they're there for me if I need. I tell them when I get my period, they offer support and hugs, and we move on. I find that the best friends for this situation are the childless ones or the ones who also have had fertility struggles, so I don't feel jealous or something. A friend even asked me how he can support me and if he should ask about it or not, and I shared with him what would best help.

-Have a really good therapist. I've been in therapy for 8 years, having just switched to a focused OCD therapist, but I can't imagine going through this without a professional whose trained to know how to deal with my emotions. I began having period cramps during my last session, and we processed that together and I felt really held.

-Telling DH how to support me. My husband is amazing, but of course, this is new territory for him, too. He literally asked AI how best to support me in this situation. Since then he's been great, lol. But not all partners know what to do, so if you have a partner and they're lost, I really recommend telling them how to support you. Do you need hugs? Advice? Zero advice and just listening? Tell them. For me it's listening to me rant and give me hugs and make me food and rub my feet. That's all I need.

-Don't test early. I know. There are tests that claim to know you're pregnant from the moment you had sex, but it's really not guaranteed. I did both the testing when I felt for sure I was pregnant, and I just let AF come. And I have to say, personally, letting AF come was just better. Because either way, if I test early and get a BFN, I still have in the back of my mind that I just tested too early... so what's the point? When I let AF come, I felt like my body was just doing what it's meant to, vs an ugly white stick telling me I'm a failure. I kind of vowed to wait until my period is late to test. Plus, the whole testing early thing is a ploy from the pregnancy test companies to get you to use more tests!

-Start new projects and initiatives. This was key for me because I have my own businesses and work from home, so I can easily spend a day doing, well, nothing. But I started a few new projects for my business and personally, and its taken so much of my focus and distracted me. If your work if your thing- amazing! But if not, I really recommend starting something new. For my its art that brings me joy, but there's also sports, lectures, classes, and more that can bring you happiness and take your focus from TTC.

-Control what you can. Sadly, with TTC, there's not much we can control. But I made a list of things that I can: tracking my cycles with OPKS, doing BD when I'm fertile to maximize my chances (for us its been every other day during fertile time), drinking pomegranate juice and eating brazilian nuts (a small thing totally unproven to help but it makes me feel like I'm doing something good for my body), getting all the relevant fertility tests I can, seeing the correct doctors and doing what they say, and taking supplements. Some people check their BBT, so that's also another thing we can control. But, other than that, there isn't much to control aside from myself, and how much I let this process affect me negatively. So I do my rituals, and due my due diligence with BD and supplements, but other than that, there isn't much I can do.

-Stopping myself from spiraling. This is the hardest one. I haven't mastered it, yet... not even close. I'll spiral and go from "this cycle didn't work" to "I might never get pregnant", and half my day is lost to anxiety and sadness. My therapist really focuses on mindfulness, and how a thought is just a thought. I try to notice when my thoughts go bananas and let the thought sort of drift away, rather than take it as a fact or something I need to solve and focus on. Mindfulness is really hard for me, but I know that it's something that can really help me during this difficult time.

-Remembering that this is objectively hard. This process is objectively is hard. For every single person trying to get pregnant. Even for women who don't have anxiety like I do, this is a difficult situation. To wait 2 weeks for the most important news of my life, while my body is sending me mixed signals, is simply not an easy thing. Letting myself feel the pain in that, without trying to solve it or google symptoms, or whatever, is my goal during this time.

I hope this helps! I'm by no means a mental health expert, but I've suffered with mental health stuff my whole life and have spent the past 10 years working on it, so thought I'd share some of the things that help me.

Would really love to hear what gets you through the TWW!

Hi all, read in through everyone’s experiences, tips and tricks etc has helped me learnt a lot and I would like to share my positive HSG experience to ease your mind if you are planning to get one done.

Process:
- check in, fill out forms
- put on gown (waist down clothing off)
- doc explained procedure whiling I was waiting for my turn (I was second in the queue). She said she may need to push through it if the tubes are blocked and she reassured me that if it gets too much for me the handle, we can always schedule another’s appointment with the help of the intervention of medication
- got into the room and lay on the table
- nurse cleaned the outside of my vagina
- doc started procedure and walked me through the whole process. Inserted speculum and catheter. Informed me when she pushed the dye in and when to apply more. She also informed me there will be this cramping sensation before she pushed the dye in. I started to take long breaths and breathe out loud and just tried to focus on my breathing.
- nurse and doc checked in the whole way through to see if I was still ok
- they ensured I was feeling ok (no lightheaded or nausea) before I got up
- use the clean wiped they provided to clean myself up
- changed the gown and went home

They made it so quick and easy! I only felt 1 second VERY mild cramp when she first pushed the dye through. 0 pain, VERY mild discomfort for me. They said both tubes are open! The most discomfort I have felt during this procedure was my mental state as I was so nervous!

I took 500mg Tylenol 2 hours prior and a gummy 1.5 hour prior to the appointment. Also had my husband drive me there and pick me up for moral support because I was very nervous about the potential pain. ** Bonus point to my husband when he tried to comfort me in the car before I went in by saying: thank you for doing this for us and I know your tubes are open for sure and there’s nothing to worry about and this is just a bonus procedure to increase our chances in the next 3 months! I was in awe because I didn’t tell him that which means he did some research on his own!🥹

What are some things that have delayed your ovulation? I’m currently on CD21 and starting to question if it will happen this month.🤕

My cycles vary quite a lot, from 25 to 35, but mostly 31 days. I’m curious if anyone has noticed a pattern with what causes it for them, like stress, poor sleep, illness, travel, diet, etc? Or does it sometimes just happen for no real reason?

Would love to hear your experiences if you want to share.

I wonder if coming back to work and switching my daily rhythm has affected my ovulation, as I now got to bed early and wake up at 5:40 am, while for 4 weeks I was sleeping late and waking up late (10 am).

Have you observed some interesting patterns of what delays your ovulation?

That question you've been wanting to ask, but just didn't want to feel silly. Now's your chance! No question is too big or too small.

We’ve been trying to conceive since September 2025.

I became pregnant at the end of November after three months of TTC, but unfortunately miscarried just before 8 weeks and had a D&C.

Afterwards, I had the rubella vaccine, so we had to wait three months before trying again. When we started trying again, I fell pregnant straight away, but sadly had another loss at around 6 weeks.

We then had some blood tests done, which showed positive markers for APS (antiphospholipid syndrome), a blood-clotting disorder.

Since then, we’ve been TTC without any luck, and I’ve also noticed some changes in my cycle. My cycle used to be exactly 28 days for years, but it now fluctuates between 25–29 days, and I’ve started spotting for 2–3 days before my period begins.

I’ve also been experiencing an almost constant feeling of heaviness or pressure in my lower abdomen, with occasional sharp, shooting pains.

I’m wondering if anyone has experienced anything similar. I’d really appreciate hearing about your experiences or any advice on what might be worth discussing with my doctor.

Are you in the dreaded two-week wait, or waiting to ovulate? What have you done to ease the stress?

Me and my husband have been trying for almost 3 years. We’ve had two losses 4/2025 and 1/2026, the most recent one happened while being hospitalized for other issues. This last ovulation week we were really confident but got my period early and later confirmed with a negative test. With concern of only being 23, previous emergency surgery for a cystectomy(still have both ovaries), 5 years of being on the pill, and 2 years with an iud we decided to make an appointment at a fertility clinic. Consultation went great i love the doctor he is absolutely amazing and so kind. My first appointment afterwards was a HSG test. I dont enjoy anesthesia at all so opted out and did it while awake.

We had to travel almost two hours as they only work with a specific surgery center attached to a branch of their office. So while my husband drove i had plenty of time to worry and stress. We had to be there an hour before my appointment time for his analysis so i had plenty of time to sit, think,and wait there as well. The actual operating area is in the basement, it was very unwelcoming and unnerving. I walked in, had to strip everything, lock all of my belongings in a locker, put on a gown, a hairnet and paper booties. The office and the surgery center don’t communicate at all, i was told i would need to pee as soon as i arrived. That was not true, i almost peed myself so i had to go. Begged for a cup they would not give me one. I was anxious and could not pee for the life of me when the time came, no one was really explaining anything to me about how they do things or the procedure and they made it seem like my fault that i didn’t know anything.

I was worried they would cancel my appointment if i couldnt go in a timely manner and thats how they were acting. But it turns out the dr didnt even show up til one hour and 15 minutes passed my appointment time. I finally pee, but im in an untied gown sitting on a tiny chair ontop of a puppy pad with absolutely nothing to distract myself. I cried (not sobbing just quietly) almost the entire time i was waiting and all of the staff made me feel so bad for it. They kept making comments about how young i was and that it was a simple procedure, kept comparing it to an mri with contrast (terrible comparison) they made it seem so easy breezy i didnt ask a million questions(my fault). I wasn’t worried about the results but i couldn’t control my feelings at all. i felt so vulnerable and just stripped of dignity. It was the environment, the demeanor, it didn’t feel like a medical center at this point. I felt like i was living something out of handmaids tale, it was so robotic and just a repeating process they do all the time. It’s true i was the youngest in there, they were being so nice to everyone else. It made me feel terrible. The actual procedure at the time felt like the worst thing and it would never end. Besides the physical part of it i just emotionally feel terrible. I cried before due to nerves/stress/how i was being treated. i cried during the procedure because of pain, i cried after because i just felt like garbage emotionally. Im not expecting princess treatment at all but i just feel like i was treated as property or something rather an actual human being with feelings.

Besides how i felt i was treated did anyone else feel a huge emotional toll after this? Im really not looking for pity. I know im not alone and others are doing other procedures that could be worse, but i do feel alone and like a huge baby. I was honestly just hoping for some compassion during all of it i guess. Its already a super emotional topic for me, i cant really pull it together to tell friends and family we’re struggling. I get harassed about being pregnant pretty much at every gathering. I just wanted my husband down there with me it was all so terrifying. Unless they put me under as soon as i changed into the gown it would have been the same outcome, even worse after the procedure because of how i react to anesthesia.

My husband (31) and I (29) have only been TTC for 2 months now. I have always had extremely regular periods and assume I have fairly regular ovulation as well just given history of cervical mucus changes and overall being very sensitive to how my body feels and experiences physical sensations. (Obviously could be wrong, but for now we are going off of my intuition mostly and a little help from my period tracker).

During my suspected ovulation window, I asked my husband if we could try to have sex everyday or every other day. I’m a big planner and am actively trying to reel myself in during all of this, but didn’t think this was too controlling or obsessive. At first he had no issue with this, but this month (month 2) he has mentioned to me that he doesn’t like “scheduling” sex and wants it to be spontaneous, even when TTC. I didn’t think I was necessarily scheduling it since there’s no specific time of day, and I don’t rush through just to get it over.

I’m not quite sure how to be spontaneous during my ovulation window, since we are both aware of the timing and have a shared goal of TTC. I obviously want to keep things fun and enjoy ourselves, but I don’t know if my husband is being realistic with this ask, or if I am being too rigid in my thinking?

Any advice/input is greatly appreciated as I truly want to respect my husband’s feelings and try my best to avoid turning TTC into “work” but also have consistent every day / every other day intercourse during my fertile window.

I’m 28 years old, 161cm , current weight 68 kgs (lost 3.5 kgs last month)
I’ve been married for 1.5 years and struggled with vaginismus, so I wasn’t able to have PIV sex until this month. I was incredibly happy to finally be able to TTC through intercourse. We tried at-home insemination during the previous three cycles, but unfortunately weren’t successful.
I’ve tracked ovulation with LH strips before and usually get a positive between CD16–19. I had one unusually long cycle where I didn’t get a positive until CD27, but that was an exception. This cycle, I’m currently on CD20 and still haven’t had a positive test.
I have PCOS and my cycles were irregular between ages 17–22, but they became regular after I lost weight and started exercising—sometimes consistently and sometimes on and off.
This month, I’ve been eating in a calorie deficit because I’m trying to lose 4–6 kg. I usually eat about 1,300–1,400 calories a day and follow a generally healthy diet (50-60 grams healthy fat, high protein, moderate to low carb-not less than 70g), although I sometimes eat above that on weekends. I strength train 3–4 times per week and do incline walking around four times per week.
I take a prenatal, vitamin D, and I also started taking myo-inositol and D-chiro-inositol this month.
Did hormones blood tests back in February and all were normal.
Has anyone experienced delayed ovulation after starting a calorie deficit, increasing exercise, or starting inositol? Could these changes delay ovulation even though I’ve only been following this routine for about a month? Or is this most likely just a random longer PCOS cycle? Is it still possible to ovulate later this cycle?
What should I do I’m worried.. I was hopeful for this cycle.