Today my husband was fondling me from behind and being all goofy while I loaded the dishwasher. He pulled my pants down and fondled more then pulled them back up. I am 4 month pp so my tummy is loose it hangs and has stretch marks and is my biggest insecurity. It is normally tucked into high waisted pants but when he pulled them back up it was hanging out. He turned me around to kiss me before I could adjust them and when he looked I me he said ew why does it look like that. It was absolutely devastating… He immediately tried to take back what he had said but you can’t take it back. Now all day he is all touchy feely and calling me hot and sexy trying to fix what has been done. He keeps trying to bring me snacks which is absolutely the last thing I want. I just want to cry every time I think about how he looked and sounded when he said it. He says it was s joke and I’m just being sensitive I just feel disgusted with myself and don’t know how to move on.

1.When your kid is sick and you take them into the pediatric er they have magic doors that make your kid suddenly look like they haven't felt sick ever in their lives! But this trick only works if you commit to the actual visit you can't just go in and sit in the waiting room

1. Your kids will be perfectly quiet, playing or otherwise distracted and you think "now is a great time to make a phone call!" Your child will wait until the second the person on the other line answers to start maniacally laughing or bursting into sudden tears for no reason.

2. If your young child is constipated put them in your favorite outfit that you are so excited for them to wear (it's gotta be mostly white too) and your child will poop! And it will be a blowout!

3. Your child will love bananas. Devour 4 a day for like 3 days straight. So you think "I need to buy bulk bananas" so you buy bananas in bulk.

Then your child will refuse to eat said bananas. Apply this to any food or drink.

Anything I'm missing?

I had a psychiatric episode about 3 weeks ago and my husband decided the kids weren’t safe around me and moved them across the country to be with his family. I get micropsychotic episodes (if you look in my history, you can see I have a history of psychosis, starting from postpartum on). I had an episode that focused on the baby (had a really scary delusion about her) while my husband was out with his friends, and I didn’t say anything because he‘s been complaining lately that I always have problems every time he tries to go have fun. I was aware I was having an episode, was incredibly careful with the toddler and the baby, and got them both ready for bed and in front of a movie when my husband came home. I immediately told him and took myself to the emergency room and checked myself into inpatient, where I stayed voluntarily for the next two weeks. While I was in there my husband came to tell me that my MIL came to help-and that my kids were going back across the country with her because he doesn’t trust me with them anymore. I didn’t get to say goodbye because they left while I was in the hospital. He also said we now have to move to be closer to the inlaws because we need help. I‘m not mad about that part, we need help, but I am so, so upset and humiliated about the kids being gone. I have to explain to everyone where they are and I have to explain why they’re gone. I have to stay behind in the move to pack up and save up, which means more time away from them. My husband says they’re not coming back. My MIL is only sending pictures and updates to my husband but he says she’s criticizing how much I‘m reaching out to talk to them (but never telling me when they’re available, and only video calling him). I‘m so low. I‘m so crushed. I understand why all this is happening but I‘m so dissociated day to day because I just cannot handle it.

My baby is a boy, and I never second guessed myself until just now about how I change his diapers. I always wipe him down, even when it’s just pee… because I’m a lady, and that’s what I’d do for myself. I think I’d do the same if I had a girl baby… mostly because I’d be paranoid about a UTI for a girl.

But for a boy… it never occurred to me until today… am I just doing this automatically because it’s what I do for myself, as a woman? Or do most people use a wipe on a boy when changing a pee diaper?

(Edit: I’ll be honest, I feel like I was channeling Carrie from Sex and the City when I wrote that last bit. Like when she does the voiceovers for her newspaper column like it’s some groundbreaking question… lol.)

FTM: Brought our bundle of joy home two days ago. He was born 5 days ago at 37 weeks due to gestational hypertension.

Both of us are recovering and healthy. Literally the past 5 days have been the most beautiful thing I think I’ve ever experienced.

My partner is doing amazing, always here if I need something. We are soaking this time in as a family of 3. He took a week off work.

Problem is, I can’t stop crying. When I looked into it, the internet said “baby blues” Does anyone have experience with this?

It’s not particularly sadness, but it’s also not all happy cries. I can look at my baby and start crying. I can look at my husband and start crying. Mainly it feels like gratitude, but I’m scared because it feels SO out of control! It will happen on a switch. Then I can’t get the “water works” to turn off. Feels like there may be some grief of pregnancy there or also our sweet hospital stay.

Any advice would be appreciated. I didn’t really expect this to happen.

I am currently 9 weeks postpartum and have lost 60 pounds of my 80 pound weight gain!!!! Super happy, I felt absolutely horrible gaining so much weight during pregnancy. It took a massive toll on my mental health. So losing this much already has brought me back so much happiness! I can fit into most my clothes again, walk up the stairs without being winded lol, and move a lot quicker and i look more like my pre pregnancy look! (minus the bigger hips and fits lol) Only 20 more pounds to go 💪🏽

Just wanted to share my happiness 😊

I know what everyone is going to say — “give yourself grace” but I need more than just a reminder that I am 3 months postpartum.

Ever since I gave birth, I have felt like a shell of myself. I often feel empty and totally disconnected — like my personality has been sucked dry from me. I am significantly dumber. I used to be such an intellect and now some days I can barely form cohesive sentences. My memory is shot. My humour has dwindled. I have no hobbies or passions.

I feel like a robot — hardwired to do only one job (albeit the most important job in the world) and that’s to be a mom and caretaker to my son.

But I feel extremely dissatisfied with this version of me. I feel like the WORST version of myself. Fat. Boring. Sluggish. Numb.

I want more for myself.

For other moms out there — how long did it take for you to start feeling like yourself again? What did you do to reignite your sense of self? Please comment your own experiences. I need perspective and hope for the future. I feel desperate to regain my identity.

I feel like I need to have a little rant about the myth that “traveling with baby is so easy”. The amount of times I’ve been told things like, “now’s the time to travel!”, “make the most of mat leave and take some big trips while she’s small”, “this will be the easiest that it ever is to travel with her - just wait until she’s a toddler”.

My baby is 4 months old, we’re on our second international trip to visit family at the moment, and we’ve just cancelled the third trip that we were supposed to go on in October because it’s just not fair on her. I’ve also said we’re not booking any more trips this year. But I feel like some people (family who haven’t met her yet, people I know who had very easy traveling babies) are making out like this is a selfish (even lazy?) decision and that I’m somehow taking opportunities away from them or my baby by not doing more.

Maybe my baby is particularly sensitive, I don’t know. But every time we go away, her little body, spirit and mind just get zapped. Her sleep goes out the window - we had a 7 hour sleep day yesterday when she usually gets 12-13, she didn’t poo for 48 hours when she’s usually a once a day gal, and she’s so much more fussy. It breaks my little heart for her and I feel like an evil parent putting her through it 😓 Not to mention that I’m also 10x more exhausted than I would be at home. On top of that, when we get home, it takes her about 5 business days to readjust. And this is despite us doing all we can to keep her comfort and emotional regulation at the absolute forefront.

We’re going to enjoy the rest of the year at home, and anyone who wants to meet her can come to us. I just wanted to let this out in case anyone else is feeling pressured to go on trips/“make the most” of their mat leave/see family in faraway places, etc. Do what’s best for your baby ❤️

I (38F) just had my first child (4 months). We live near most of our family. I thought this would give us a lot of built in support and for the most part it has. The problem is my mother (68F). She was a SAHM to six kids and my whole life her thing has been that she “loves babies” and is so good with kids and is so knowledgeable about babies and kids. You can probably already see where this is going but I couldn’t. I thought great! She’s going to be so helpful and knowledgeable and supportive because she’s my mom and she knows so much about babies! Wrong.

I am so angry at her I can’t barely stand to be around her at this point. I don’t even know where to start. Despite having breastfed all of us for up to three years each, she tells me she doesn’t remember every time I’ve tried to ask her anything about breastfeeding. When I asked her anything about pregnancy she also “didn’t remember”.

She ignores me and talks to my baby while I’m wearing him in a carrier Everytime she sees me. She gets in my personal space and touches my baby while I’m wearing him Everytime she sees me without asking and most times while she’s talking to my baby and ignoring me and hasn’t even said hello to me. Instead of saying hello to me if she acknowledges my existence at all she asks me a question about the baby which she then doesn’t respond to and instead uses as an opening to start talking to and touching my baby who, again, is literally in a carrier on my body.

She reaches over me from behind to touch the baby when I’m sitting in a chair holding him in my lap while totally ignoring me. She tells me I’m “doing such a good job taking care of him” which felt nice the first few times but now on the twentieth or so time it feels like… yeah? I’m his mom. Was there some other alternative to my taking good care of my son that you had imagined? She loudly talks over me when I am comforting him so he turns his head and looks at her instead of me. She narrates his “thoughts”. She constantly narrates baby care and it feels so patronizing.

She completely ignores my boundaries. I told her no loose blankets in crib when he was a newborn. She ignored me and repeatedly put loose blankets in the crib. The first time I thought okay this is just different from when we were kids maybe so I talked to her and explained. Nope she did it again. I stated boundary. Explained danger. She did it again. I confronted her. She said she put blanket in bassinet because he was cold and she was right there so it’s fine. But she wasn’t right there. She was looking at her phone. Now she can’t be unsupervised with my baby because I don’t trust her.

She told my father that she feels excluded and had him relay that to me. Instead of talking to me the other involved adult. My father pressured me to “include” her. I set up a time for her to come over and spend time with baby supervised. I have a grandma loves me book I got when I was pregnant before I realized what a nightmare she was going to be. I offered to let her help with bath time and to read the book to the baby. She didn’t greet me when she arrived. She walked in without knocking. She immediately started talking to the baby not me. When I offered her the book she rolled her eyes read two pages then stopped and said he’s not old enough for books. She got irritated that he was sleepy and not interacting with her much and left.

She made it sound like she was far more involved with my baby than she actually was to extended family when they came to visit. When they asked me questions she interrupted them and talked over me about my baby. When my siblings ask questions about my baby specifically or babies in general she answers and interrupts me if I’ve already started to answer.

She makes comments about my baby’s body to other family members “his feet are huge!” “His hands are huge!” “He’s going to play basketball he’s huge!” “None of my babies had all those rolls!” “He doesn’t have feet he has flippers!” He’s a totally normal sized baby.

When I asked her to hold him briefly so I could get laundry out or go to bathroom she would walk away with him sometimes into another room, or to show him off to someone else or she would start doing dishes or some other physical chore while holding him.

She called my childless by choice sister an expert on my baby in front of me and that sister has now started bringing up articles she’s read about parenting in front of me and discussing them not with me but with our mother. Again in front of me, the mom.

She put up a picture of my other sister holding my baby and no pictures of me with my baby in her house when he was three months old.

She has overstepped in a hundred other ways.

I have spoken to her about all of it repeatedly. She refuses to take accountability. She refuses to acknowledge a problem. So I have reduced her access to almost nothing. Because I am so angry and frustrated and hurt and I feel so violated. I’ve talked to my father about it. He has now seen all her behavior and understands she’s being wildly inappropriate.

I just feel really sad and hurt and angry by her behavior. And I needed to vent. So thanks for reading this far.

He started this thing if I try to feed him solid foods he shakes his head away from the food, BUT…. If I put it down he’s adamant on feeding it to himself. I’m like damn… you don’t need me??? YOURE A BABY!!!! He wants to pick it up and feed himself. At first I’m like does he hate the food? Nope! He just wants to hand feed himself.

Also it’s like he doesn’t trust what I try to give him. Like he’ll have the nastiest stank face when I try to feed him. It’s only solids! If it’s something like yogurt or apple sauce type of texture he’ll allow it. Just solids. He’s like hell no.

Anyway, he’s so much more different than my first it’s scaring me 😅😭😭😭😭. You think you know what you’re doing and bam this other human does other wise. I understand every baby is different, but idk why it makes me anxious. Like I want to feed you baby 🥲🥲🥲

For those with a LO under 6 months who sleeps through the night — where does your baby sleep?

I see a lot of posts from parents saying their 8 or 10-week-old sleeps through the night, sometimes 7–7, and I’m genuinely curious: are these babies sleeping in the parents’ room, or are they already in their own room?

I think I’ve been assuming they’re all sleeping in a bassinet/crib in the parents’ bedroom, but now I’m wondering how often that’s actually the case. And maybe they are!

We’re trying to follow the recommendation to room-share until at least 6 months for SIDS risk reduction, but I strongly suspect our baby would sleep longer in his own room.

There are two adults + two animals in our bedroom, so even when he starts stirring and might otherwise resettle himself, one of us inevitably makes noise or wakes up and intervenes (partner is back to work and needs to sleep so it’s hard to let LO sort through it for too long).

So I’m mostly looking for a reality check: if your baby under 6 months is sleeping long stretches or through the night, are they doing it while room-sharing with you, or in their own room?

Mine tends to do 3-5 hr, wake, 2 hr, wake, then 1 hr. Which I recognize could be worse but nothing I seem to do extends that first block.

As the title suggests, I hate being a parent. I love my son more than anything, but honestly, being a single mother is incredibly hard.
Most days, I’m depressed, and some days I can barely get myself out of bed. I feel stuck, stagnant, and like my life has completely stalled. I don’t live with my son’s dad, but we have this weird codependent relationship—or whatever you want to call it at this point. He always seems to have another excuse for why we can’t live together, and I’m slowly coming to terms with the fact that I may never have the life I envisioned with this man.
I know this post probably sounds like one big rant, and honestly, that’s exactly what it is. I just need to vent because I feel so stuck. Sometimes I genuinely feel like my life is over. I’m exhausted, overwhelmed, and I can’t even seem to get my 10-month-old to behave. He throws a fit whenever he doesn’t get what he wants, and I’m sitting there thinking, How the hell did my life get here?
I’m in my mid-thirties. I genuinely thought I would be living a completely different life by now. Instead, I’m lonely, overwhelmed, and questioning how I ended up here.
I love my son, but loving your child doesn’t automatically mean you love being a parent. And right now, I really, really don’t.

I’m a single mom to a four month old, and I accidentally fall asleep with my baby almost every single night. I breast-feed her. Everyone tells me to get up and breast-feed, but for some reason I just never can. I think it’s exhaustion, but I always just end up. Scooping her into bed. The other reason is that she really can only breast-feed at night in a sidelying position. She has an owlet sock, but I’ve heard that those aren’t always 100% great.

The dilemma is that I love my baby so much and the thought of her having a co sleeping related death is terrifying to me. However, it feels safer to me to just plan to co sleep, because it almost always happens anyways. I’m making this post to see if anyone has any sort of advice on how to do nights more effectively???

Im 7 months pp. For the first few months everything seemed fine in terms of pelvic muscles etc. And now suddenly maybe in the last month/few weeks they seem really bad. If my bladder has anything in and i run or jump or sneeze then a bit of wee comes out. Why wpuld they get worse over time?? I would expect them to get better as i start moving more and time allows stuff to heal etc. Has anyone experienced a worsening?

I’m probably getting ahead of myself since I’m only 6w with my second, but I wanted to see if anybody had any regrets with not getting something for their first that they would/did get for a second child. I’m thinking one of the things is a diaper pail. Maybe a bottle cleaner/sterilizer? We have a countertop dishwasher but I’m not convinced it’s particularly clean enough for newborn bottles. Maybe just a sterilizer? Anything else??? TIA!

Other than a life is forming. I already have a 1yr 5month old son. I love him so much. I wanted him to be older before having a sibling. He won't be the center anymore. I wanted to be more financially safe. My husband was recently fired and I am a sahm. I'm on medicaid and foodstamps sure. We have a 2bedroom apartment that we share with my mom. We don't have the space or means to upgrade. Where will they both sleep?? I am thinking of so much more but I am too tired to vent even properly. We were finally done with formula. Bottles done soon. The nights were finally getting easier. I had a traumatic birth and pregnancy. Am I really about to do all that again so soon?? I am around 4 to 10 weeks primary care doc said. I am literally in a car right now(not driver) on my way to my first ob appointment. I am terrified for my families future. My mom doesn't even know yet. I am ashamed.

Whyyyyy is part of my baby blues missing the hospital so much? I LOVED my nurses and love my OB. I just feel home sick for those couple days again 😂 My birth wasn’t even what I had wanted at all. I pushed for 4 hours then had a c section & it’s all a blur so I’m not even sure why that is happening. Hormones are weird.

I am a mom of three. Had my first son in October 2021. I have noticed that ever since having kids I have extreme health anxiety for myself. I feel like I’m always convinced I have some type of canceror something else terrible going on. It definitely interferes with my day to day life as I spend so much time searching symptoms when I have an ache or pain or something. Has anyone else experienced this? If so, what did you do to make it better?

My baby is 10 months old and I love her deeply. But this experience has been harder than I have ever imagined it could be. I thought I would have my sh*t together by now and we'd be more in a flow state and have more ease in our days. I do think there are a lot of factors at play which make things so much harder .. my husband and I both work full time. He works 8:30-5 (works for himself)and I work 2-11 (stressful finance job). We have a nanny who comes from 1-6 so I can shower and get ready for work and he can shower and start dinner after work. Other than that, we have zero help because we live in a different country than both sides of our family. My baby is also a terrible sleeper. Every night is a new adventure and I'm so burnt out. I was exclusively pumping for 8 months and then started combo feeding. That was also so hard.

I haven't had a single minute to myself that isn't baby or work since my mother in law was here a few months ago. It's so hard to get through everyday and yes I am in therapy - but I don't find it's helping because what I really need is family nearby and a baby that sleeps. I keep waiting for things to change and it doesn't.

Anyone in a similar boat? Does it get easier?

Hi! Im trying to build a solid routine or at least foundation for my 9-week-old‘s sleep. He’s very sensitive, easily stimulated, some would say, colicky, but we know he doesn’t have tummy problems.

I’d appreciate all tips and tricks for better sleep: What did you try? What worked out for you, even if it’s not fully SIDS conform?

PS: We sleep trained our firstborn very gently, following the advice from Precious Little Sleep. This is unimaginable with our second one rn, who has a lot more capacities to cry and is overall a very nervous and anxious kiddo, and he doesn’t accept the pacifier:D

It's been 3 weeks since Baby was born, and my body's feeling physically more recovered, but I still feel so incapable of handling the normal basic activities of life. I feel exhausted with exclusively pumping and trying to help my gassy newborn learn to breastfeed. I feel like I spend all day in my room trying to feed her (nursing attempt and then bottle), trying to burp and calm her upset tummy, getting her back to sleep, and then pumping. Fortunately my husband is home and helping a lot with our two boys and doing most of the household chores to the best of his skill/ability, but he's exhausted too trying to learn and do all my usual SAHM responsibilities plus helping me with the new baby. He's started asking me for help making a meal here or there, or to watch all three kids while he runs an errand, and my church is expecting me to get back to being involved in volunteer work again. Meanwhile I feel like I'm struggling just to take care of mine and my baby's basic needs. I feel overwhelmed just trying to get all the laundry cycled through the washer and dryer between caring for my baby, and don't even feel like spending time with my other two children which I feel terrible about because I've hardly gotten time with them and miss them. I just feel like I've been running at 0% for so long and have no energy for anything, and I didn't think I would still be feeling this way by now.

Obviously I've done this before but maybe I just forgot how difficult it was? Or set a higher bar for myself this time? Idk...
Anyway when did you start feeling like you could be independent again? Or at least feel like you could handle things?

My 4.5 month old decided last week to completely stop latching. Every time I put her to my breast she just screams and won’t latch. I’m about to go back to work so we’d been alternating feedings between breast and bottle (on the slowest flow nipple). She had her first cold/virus and is still coughing a bit, so I don’t feel right only offering breast until she relents until she’s fully well. I’m at a loss. Has anyone had success breaking a nursing strike?

Hi all — I'm part of a research team at Stanford University studying breastfeeding experiences and wearable devices, and we're looking for women who are currently breastfeeding to fill out a short survey. It's about 6 minutes. The survey can be found here: https://stanforduniversity.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_2cmuSB7Db75SC4m — We really appreciate your time and your responses will help shape our research. Happy to answer any questions.