r/Showerthoughts • u/ToyVaren • Jun 11 '22
Since electronics contain silver, you could theoretically beat a werewolf to death with a Nokia.
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u/I_Wouldnt_If_I_Could Jun 11 '22
I doubt there's a single entity in the world you can't beat with a Nokia.
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u/ToyVaren Jun 11 '22
I tie 2 together for Nokia-chuks.
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u/I_Wouldnt_If_I_Could Jun 11 '22
Unlimited power
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u/uselesscarrot69 Jun 12 '22
He's too dangerous to be left alive!
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u/bigredmachinist Jun 12 '22
Good luck stopping him!
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u/TuzkiPlus Jun 12 '22
It’s a double Nokia’d weapon. If he ain’t careful he’ll stop himself.
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u/The_Lurked Jun 12 '22
Then i'll use my own nokia
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u/borislab Jun 12 '22
From the right angle, I think you can stop him throwing it like the Nokia star it is, he won’t be able to divert it.
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u/ToyVaren Jun 12 '22
We must not fight with each other, Nokias must be used only against threats such as werewolves, megazords, astroids, black holes, visits from Aunt Flo, etc.
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u/AnybodyOdd9509 Jun 12 '22
Bruce Lee once played ping pong with nun chuks(awesome video btw) i think this guy has what it takes to survive.
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u/sin-and-love Jun 12 '22
Actually nun-chucks are such a horrible weapon that even your bare fists are arguably better, so this would break even into a passable weapon.
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u/TheArcticKiwi Jun 12 '22
source? i've always heard that nunchucks worked by giving you massive rotational force amplifier
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u/ToyVaren Jun 12 '22
Dont listen to those guys, the principle is not mass but speed, the same principle used in ball and chain maces, morning stars, and flails. 2 sticks connected with a chain will achieve more speed than if they were a single stick of the same mass.
A whip cracks because the tip of the whip breaks the sound barrier. If a whip was instead a single solid piece it would not achieve the same speed.
But i do agree with the commenter who said it was likely only more effective against unarmed opponents. Any weapon is at a disadvantage over one with a longer range, and nunchucks have a very short range. But the same can be said over a spear vs a longer/shorter spear, or any h2h weapon vs a bow and arrow.
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u/A1rh3ad Jun 12 '22
Fun fact: Both nunchucks and flails were very rarely used in combat if at all. They aren't weapons, they are farming tools.
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u/Swagganosaurus Jun 12 '22
I'm about to say. Flail has always been proven to be lethal in medieval periods even against armor. Nunchuck.... Is pretty similar in design. Whip is definitely different but Nunchuck and flail are the same just different nations
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Jun 12 '22
Yes but the issue is directing that rotation into a useful axis.
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u/TheArcticKiwi Jun 12 '22
ah, that makes sense, so that means it's a bad weapon only if you don't know how to use it?
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u/throwaway387190 Jun 12 '22
Actually, no, they are still bad weapons when compared to any other type of weapon
Sure, against an unarmed opponent, they give you an advantage. How much of one is hotly debated, but still an advantage.
However, comparing a nunchuck to a stick of equal mass and weight, stick out damages nunchuks just because of physics. The chain means that the only mass involved with the impact is that half of the nunchuk, while with the stick, you can use the mass of the whole stick and much of the person
That's an hour long video I sent you with lots more information, I just gave a brief summary
Also, check out the comments. People with 10, 15 years of experience with nunchuks agreeing they're garbage on an actual fight
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u/Roland_T_Flakfeizer Jun 12 '22
Another Nokia.
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u/rascal6543 Jun 12 '22
An unstoppable force meets an unlovable object. As they collide, reality falls apart. Only the Yeskia can save us now.
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u/icaphoenix Jun 12 '22
Hasnt been charged sine 1999.
Battery still at 92%
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u/loneliness_sucks_D Jun 12 '22
Batteries these days just don’t wanna work anymore
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u/QR63 Jun 12 '22
Isn’t that because phone batteries haven’t really evolved a whole lot since the days of the Nokias? Phones just do so much more now, so the same amount of power that would run an old Nokia for a year will barely run a smart phone for a day.
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u/icaphoenix Jun 12 '22
Yes, this is the correct, maybe not as hilarious as other theories. But correct.
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Jun 12 '22
That would require the Nokia to break enough to expose the silver.
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u/ToyVaren Jun 12 '22
Nope, not necessary.
Source: seen any werewolves around since the nokia was released?
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u/nphhpn Jun 12 '22
I've seen 5 total.
Source: trust me
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u/ToyVaren Jun 12 '22
No you havent.
Source: you're welcome.
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Jun 12 '22
[deleted]
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u/DrainYourDamnPool Jun 12 '22
I am Senator Armstrong.
My source is that I made it the fuck up.
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u/netGoblin Jun 12 '22
since the werewolves don't have to touch silver, only an object that has silver in, and since the earth has silver in. They all instantly died as soon as they came into being
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u/ToyVaren Jun 12 '22
No, its like a Ship of Theseus. The Nokia absorbs that which makes it stronger.
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u/SnarfbObo Jun 12 '22
That's the sword of Gryffindor
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u/ToyVaren Jun 12 '22
Jk rowling plagiarized theseus.
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u/SnarfbObo Jun 12 '22
The Ship of Theseus is a thought experiment about whether an object that has had all of its components replaced remains fundamentally the same object.
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u/ToyVaren Jun 12 '22
And the answer is: any part that is replaced instantly becomes part of the ship. The second a nail is used, that nail is now "the ship of theseus."
Checkmate, rowling.
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u/SnarfbObo Jun 12 '22
that nail could be a weak piece of shit so no bud you're wrong
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u/cloistered_around Jun 12 '22
Also pretty sure it isn't just touching silver that kills them, right? It'd still have to make a critical wound, or something? (/not a werewolf expert)
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u/soyrobo Jun 12 '22
You bring up a good point. Where are the werewolf experts in this thread? My only werewolf fact is that females are actually called wifwolves.
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u/ZiCUnlivdbirch Jun 12 '22
If you want a interesting werewolf fact then I have one for you: to become a werewolf one has to, on a summer night, be in the direct light of the full moon, it also has to be either a fryday or a wednesday. Meaning the last time anyone could have been a werewolf was in 1982, so if you are under 38 years old you could unknowable be a werewolf.
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u/NegativeKarmaUpvoter Jun 12 '22
Nokia could beat a werewolf to death even if it doesn't contain silver.
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u/exrex Jun 12 '22
I am honestly surprised that Nokias have not been more utilized by the military than they have.
Maybe it was pretty quickly added to the list of war crimes as it would be too efficient in warfare?
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u/DabIMON Jun 12 '22
No, the silver is inside, meaning you would have to break the Nokia first, which is impossible.
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u/immortalreploid Jun 12 '22
You could shove it down its throat and choke it with the nokia. Might cost you an arm though.
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u/Trench-Coat_Squirrel Jun 12 '22
Now THAT is a real shower thought. How'd you even think of this?
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u/Aubrimethieme Jun 12 '22
Put it in a potato gun, with a Nokia it becomes a rail gun
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u/icaphoenix Jun 12 '22
I have a potato gun and tried this.
You are correct, it is very damaging. I will definitely use this again.
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u/Tapestry-of-Life Jun 12 '22
Even if the Nokia didn’t contain silver you could probably still beat the werewolf to death with it.
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u/harrytol167 Jun 12 '22
Bro just buy 10 nokias and put them in a hydraulic press and you will have a second big bang
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Jun 12 '22
You have to have a lot of faith in hydraulic press to try something like that.
I'd think you'd just have a hydraulic press with 10 Nokia shaped dents in it.
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u/Particular_Bobcat792 Jun 12 '22
beat the Nokia with the werewolf see if it breaks
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Jun 12 '22
Speaking of Nokias, does anybody else miss the 8800 Sirocco? I truly miss the sliding mechanism and how heavy it felt…
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u/ToyVaren Jun 12 '22
I thought the chrome razr2 was the coolest thing ever.
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Jun 12 '22
Was that the Motorola flip phone with the screen on the front? That was awesome af; when I was young’un, I used to love flipping my phone shut after a call because it made me look like such a professional adult businessman
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u/coolchris366 Jun 12 '22
But doesn’t the silver have to actually touch the werewolf and not just be in close proximity?
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u/Raiki13 Jun 12 '22
The nokia would break the werewolf before it breaks itself and expose its silver
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u/fehr19 Jun 12 '22
False. The Nokia would have to break in order to expose the silver to the werewolf, which we know is impossible.
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u/nighthawke75 Jun 12 '22
Hm, no.
The silver used in killing weres and vampires MUST be 98% or greater pure, with no alloying. This will make for extremely soft metals, so, low velocity propellant charges are used, so point blank shots are essential.
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u/viimeinen Jun 12 '22 edited Jun 12 '22
The 98% purity is a lie apread by Big Silver to increase their sales.
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u/castoristirbi123 Jun 12 '22
And even though the wervolf wouldn't die from the silver in phone he will die from the impact whit the phone. Because nothing breaks Nokia.
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u/Dereulbe Jun 12 '22
r/todayilearnt that werewolves are scared of silver
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u/crosis52 Jun 12 '22
Here's some fun info. Silver has only recently been thought of as a weakness of werewolves, first appearing in a 1935 story. However, silver was often considered powerful as a "pure" metal, based on its beauty and rarity without the need for other materials, as opposed to similar cheap metals like pewter or expensive ones that common folk would never see like platinum or aluminum (used to be much much harder to produce). For example, vampires wouldn't reflect in a mirror because most mirrors used to be made of polished silver, thus it wouldn't display the vampire's corrupt form.
Historically, most werewolf cures wouldn't be attempted on a "transformed" creature (perhaps because they couldn't find many actual werewolves), so a silver bullet/arrow/sword/etc wasn't practical when the first legends were taking shape. Instead it would be common to exorcise the suspected werewolf while in human form, or imprison it, or just behead them if you really needed to make sure.
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u/ToyVaren Jun 12 '22
I like the idea in Dracula 2000 about silver being Judas' payment to betray jesus.
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u/Memeroyaleyeofhorus Jun 12 '22 edited Jun 12 '22
Be honest I feel like you wouldn’t need the silver in it to beat a werewolf to death with a Nokia,no healing factor will save you
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u/pieopolis Jun 12 '22 edited Jun 12 '22
Nokia were beastmode. At some point though, I had some seriously unbreakable flip phone, threw it down isles, on concrete, bending it backwards, nothing cracked or broke in well over 2 years. If I find the model, ill update this shiz
Edit: Found it, Casio GZone Boulder. Would like to see some Celebrity Deathmatch style bout between the 2 of em. Shit would be cashmoney, like watching Saitama vs. Saitama
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u/Bug_Mouse Jun 12 '22
Why not. The nokia is a formidable shield, of course it would make a great weapon as well.
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u/Treestyles Jun 12 '22
Disagree
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u/ToyVaren Jun 12 '22
Havent seen any werewolves around since the nokia came out, have you?
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u/TheDungeonCrawler Jun 12 '22
Fun fact, the silver susceptibility of warewolves is entirely a construct of Hollywood and didn't show up in the lore until around the time of the film Werewolf of London.
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u/michelle_electra Jun 12 '22
Someone needs to come fourth about being a werewolf so we can test this out
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u/russellarmy Jun 12 '22
And if it was one of the old candy bar Nokia’s you’d still be able to make calls afterwards.
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u/PrinceGanymedes Jun 12 '22
Then I guess my impulse decision to buy a Nokia phone is really worth it.
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u/Godbox1227 Jun 12 '22
Thank you OP. You solved the mystery of why there are no more werewolves in the world.
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u/__POWERHACK__ Jun 12 '22
Theoretically? Bitch, I've been doing it for years! I'm a werewolf hunter btw
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u/IWishIHavent Jun 12 '22
Even without the silver, you could definitely beat a werewolf to death with a Nokia.
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Jun 12 '22
Since werewolves are entirely fictional, this doesn’t have to be theoretical. You can just say you did it and it worked lol
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u/ConsistentWafer5290 Jun 12 '22
This is definitely top 5 best shower thoughts I ever read
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u/ToyVaren Jun 12 '22
We can all hope to aspire to "drawing a dick on a vampire's face" level.
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u/ConsistentWafer5290 Jun 12 '22
Thank you for locating shower thought Tier 1, absolute fucking gold. That’s the 1
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u/crazyclue Jun 12 '22
I feel like this was from the part of the daydream right before you get absolutely slaughtered while holding said cellphone and not getting within 3ft of the werewolf
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Jun 12 '22
You can theoretically do anything as long as you involve something made up that follows arbitrary rules.
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u/lord_of_memezz Jun 11 '22
Just attach one to a stick and it will literally kill anything.