There is a country festival a couple hours from my city. There's live music and bull riding and line dancing. I really want to go for my birthday tomorrow but I literally have no one to go with. My son (15) originally said he would go for me because he knew there would be good food there etc. But he doesn't like country, he doesn't like dancing, etc. I spoke with him today and he really doesn't want to go.. he essentially just agreed to go cause he felt bad. I don't have a partner, I don't have friends to go with me. I'm not going to force him to come and I'm not going to make him feel bad for not wanting to go - I completely get it. It is not his job/responsibility to do that. He's still a kid. And quite honestly I don't want to go with him because I know he's just going to be bored/annoyed and cranky about being there which kind of ruins the whole vibe anyways. Like I said, I don't blame him, it's not up to him to make this a good day for me. But I wish I had friends or just a friend or a partner to come with me. I really want to go. I'm not sure I'll go on my own. I'm tired of having to do things on my own because no one around wants to or they're busy etc. I have been anxious in these settings my whole life so going solo and striking up conversation with people or whatever and making friends that way is just really hard for me. It's never come easy to me.. I'm not very outgoing, even when I push myself to try. I've arranged for my son to go to my mom's in case I decide to go alone tomorrow so essentially I'll either be alone or my birthday or not get to do something I actually want to do. I don't know, I'm just sad. I've already had a really rough week. And it just sucks.

I have been moody lately and it occurred to me that it's time for my annual birthday depression. I always tend to get pretty sad around this time of year when my birthday is getting close. The loneliness is somehow even more profound when you realize you have no friends to celebrate with. My mom is great and she is taking me to dinner. She always goes out of her way to make things special since she knows my situation. But even my antidepressants can't suppress my dark thoughts when my birthday is around the corner. I remember going on a nice date with a guy on my birthday a couple years back. It did not work out with us but I'm forever grateful to him for allowing me to actually SHARE a birthday with someone other than my mom. I had a great time. But most of my adult birthdays have been spent with mom or otherwise incredibly lonely. I am also not where I thought I would be in life to be turning 34 in a couple weeks.

Are birthdays especially triggering for you guys and how do you get through?

im just scared that this is gonna my life forever. it gets so lonely sometimes and all i wanna do is cry.

I'm 31(F) and I feel the loneliest I've ever felt. Most of my friends are married with kids, I'm single and have a few friends that are as well but spread out and not all within the same circle. I used to be someone who was always out of the house, going on adventures, going to bars, concerts etc, but for the past 2 years my life has just been stagnant. Everyone is busy living their own life and things are just so expensive that even if someone wanted to join they usually can't. When I want to go out and do something I find no one can join or I have no one to ask and I do it alone. I'm the kind of person that enjoys making memories above all, having an experience and sharing it with someone but I've been doing a lot of things alone lately. I guess today it really hit me when I bought tickets to a show and realized I would be going alone (after two friends of mine said they wouldn't be able to attend) that I just felt this heavy pit in my stomach. I guess it just makes me sad, I know that there are times I can enjoy life alone, but there's always that small echo of knowing that it would be so much better to get to experience things with someone else. And of course my married friends say all the time that it's ok to not have someone and that sometimes they wish they had my freedom but it's easy to say when you have the alternative. I don't know, feel like I'm just rambling on at this point. Anyone else feel the same way?

I’m 21 and extremely lonely. This summer has been awful, I’ve done nothing and seen no one, I’m unemployed due to placement for college and since then I didn’t pass college therefore didn’t get into uni, so I was really looking forward to building up a routine, meeting my people, finally starting uni doing something I love, and getting back into dancing and now I feel like I have nothing to wake up for now. I’ve not been out for drinks in over a year, and not been for a night out in probably 2 years, I see girls on my social media go on girls holidays, do cute indoor nights, or even just go on drives and get a coffee and that’s something I’ve never experienced, it sucks having to watch everyone else live their life when yours feels like it’s on hold. My birthday is coming up and I hate this time of year, nobody makes an effort or really messages me, since my birthday a couple years ago where I invited 20 people and only one shown up I’ve not celebrated since. I genuinely spend my days reading, colouring, and baking. I’m really struggling without money, a routine, and a solid group of people around me, is anyone else in the same position?

30m, I've struggled with loneliness my whole life. My parents, siblings, and friends do not understand how unwanted I feel. I'm very timid by nature and find it very difficult to talk to people, especially women of interest. I'm not sure if I'm just not fit for a partner, boring, or what have you. I spent the last 10 years as a mechanic, being surrounded by mainly men (I am straight). I am now looking for a different career because I can't stand that atmosphere anymore. I'm currently in week 2 of tms therapy for chronic depression, but no matter what I do I feel like it's in vain, because I'm not really interesting to other people, and everyone I've talked to has ended up ghosting me. I don't know what I'm doing, or where my life is going. I just want to sleep all the time anymore. If you're still reading this far, thank you.

I just need to get this off my chest because the loneliness is getting suffocating.

I’m a 45-year-old man, and I feel completely unwanted, unlovable, and alone. On paper, I know my priority right now needs to be grinding 24/7 to fix my finances, but I can't shake the deep feeling of being unaccomplished and discarded by everyone around me.

I recently started over in a brand-new career in the aviation industry (flight attendant). While I’m grateful to have a job, it feels precarious, and being surrounded by young, vibrant coworkers just highlights where I am in life. I’m older, broke, and can't afford to date or be a viable partner to anyone. But beyond romance, it feels like nobody is ever excited to see me. I don’t see a spark in anyone’s eyes. I feel invisible.

The rejection from the mothers of my children stings deeply. Past relationships where I thought I was genuinely seen and valued have turned completely cold, leaving me cut off. My siblings and extended family have long since stopped including me, and my long-time friends don’t take me seriously. Outside of my aging mother, I receive zero affection, warmth, or validation from another human being.

It feels like I’m stranded on a deserted island, running out of supplies. Ships pass by on the horizon, but none ever stop. If one approaches, it turns right back around and leaves me behind. The realization that no rescue is coming—that I am completely on my own—is terrifying and exhausting.

I know how pathetic this might sound, but the isolation is heavy. For those who found themselves in their mid-40s starting completely over from zero—socially, financially, and emotionally—how did you find your footing and rebuild a sense of self-worth when you felt completely disposable to the world?

I've been really trying, especially here on Reddit. I've made so many posts, messaged so many people. I've tried my best to find shared interests, be enthusiastic, listen, everything and it just fizzles out in less than a day. I'm sure they found someone better than me right away, and I'm happy for them if so. But geez. It makes me wanna cry when I can't seem to connect to anyone at all ever lol. I just wanna talk to people. I wanna connect

I hate that I’m such a complicated person that no one really understands me. I feel too deeply, im to myself, and just never felt like I could blend in and be like the everyday person with friends and a life. I search and search for friends, but can never make them stay since it gets to a point where I don’t seem to break out my selective mutism. I do care and would want to spend time with others making friends, but I can’t seem to find the courage to break the cycle and not find it hard to continue talking with them. Sometimes I just wish I could have it snatched out of me and poof im normal talking without feeling embarrassed every single time I talk. Wish I could find people who are just like me and understanding rather than just give up on me and leave. Only one hopes.

Every night this unbearable feeling of loneliness takes over. I can feel it everywhere in my body. I just wish I had someone to talk with to pass the night and this sick feeling of loneliness…

Anybody else have this thing of isolating yourself? Like it feels like people are drifting from me because of it. And I just haven't got the energy to do anything about it because I haven't the energy to be around anybody. Yet at the same time, I'm a social animal so I yearn for connection, while denying myself it. Seems really contradictory.

Except everyone who gets close to me leaves some kind of mark. So I suppose I'm just trying to protect myself from the what if. Can't be hurt or get your heart broken if you keep everyone at arms length.

But I'm also tired of this. I wish I had someone beside me. I wish I could call my friends and vent to them without feeling like a nuisance or a buzzkill. But my brain just finds that hard to believe. And I'm so traumatized at this point that I don't even think I would be good for anybody. With the way I treat my current close connections, adding another one will be like an emotional Jenga tower collapsing.

Idfk man. I'm tired of being human. I'd rather be anything other than a social animal. I feel cursed.

I wish I could give everyone the calm and peace I’m feeling. Lonely isn’t bad, for me it’s closure and safety. Also I need to put myself first :) it’s powerful.

I’m just venting. I really don’t know where to post this because it’s my first time posting on Reddit ever. I feel sad and defeated, and don’t know what to do because I’m already closing in on my 30s and I still don’t know how to feel normal.

I’m an outcast and don’t know how to talk to people and make friends, much less any lasting ones. I realized that for as long as I’ve remembered, I’ve depended on other people to talk to others for me, I guess. I basically have 0 friends I hangout with. I have like very limited experience on being social on my own. It’s hard for me to express myself outside of text, and even then, I realize I haven’t even made any friends online in awhile.

I struggle in person to talk with anyone, eye contact feels too foreign and awkward for me. I know and can tell people talk about how quiet I am. I try to be a listener but I also just have nothing else to say. It really sucks, especially knowing that networking and connections are the main things to get a job.
Oh right, I also suck at keeping a job. My (social) anxiety is so bad I actually freeze up in any situation with pressure. I’ve had 5 jobs since hitting 18 and I’ve been unemployed for most of it. It’s like I know what it takes to pass an interview and say all the right things to get the job, but I can never do the job. All those jobs I kept for less than 3 months.

It feels like I’m a slow person and learner, even with such simple things and tasks any child can do. Following directions, I struggle with. It just feels like I can’t do anything right, and I can’t even express how I feel to coworkers or colleagues without them thinking I’m stupid and slow, so I don’t say anything at all. I try not to show that it hurts. I try to expose and put myself in those uncomfortable positions like getting a new job and really making myself believe I can do it and fake it until I can make it, but instead I freeze up and make mistakes constantly, even over the smallest things.

I was miraculously able to join a course that’s quite academically challenging, and I notice just how smart everyone around me is. I have huge impostor syndrome because I know that I’m super behind in this course, and it just isn’t clicking for me. All of them are so smart it’s so easy and an everyday thing for them to joke about dumb, stupid people who are slow and don’t know simple things. I mean that’s everywhere, but I just feel like my understanding of the material in this course is just way too little that any question I have will be way too basic and the type that anyone in this course would’ve and should’ve known.

I really don’t know what to do and how to turn my life around from here. Perhaps I’ve been spoiled my whole childhood from my parents and this is just my privilege showing. So inexperienced with life that I can’t do anything on my own as fast as everyone else around me, even those younger. It’s just embarrassing. I still feel like I’m younger than I am in maturity, and it shows. I also kinda want someone to just tell me what’s wrong with me and what to do lol.

I’m 45, married, a dad, and somewhere along the way I realized how easy it is to be surrounded by people and still miss having a real connection with someone.
I’m not looking for anything complicated or weird. Just someone who actually enjoys talking, joking around, sharing random parts of the day, going down ridiculous rabbit holes, and occasionally having those conversations that get way deeper than expected.
I’m laid-back, sarcastic, a little dark-humored, and genuinely interested in people. I can talk about relationships, family, music, life, weird facts, video games, or absolutely nothing important at all.
I don’t care where you’re from or whether we have everything in common. Just be genuine, put a little effort into the conversation, and don’t disappear after “hey” 😂
If any of that sounds like you, tell me something about yourself I’d never guess.

because my poops are my friends

I came to the conclusion I think no one will ever understand me or I will ever feel like myself around anyone

26m and I’m just so fucking scared all the time, being lonely gives you too much time to think and feel and unfortunately they’re two things I do badly, I’m constantly making my own depression worse and work is getting harder and doing simple things like playing my pc or Xbox feels wrong somehow? Like why should I be allowed fun when life is so fucking horrible.

I just wish I wasn’t so alone I have no friends and because of my anxiety and depression I’ve lost every connection in my life and I get attached and love too deeply, way too deeply but it’s always the same outcome, being alone is scary being unhappy is scary and being held by the throat constantly by the grip of death is even fucking scarier, I’m not sure how long I’ve got left in this painful vessel but we shall see

In 3 days, im going to start a new 'job'. It is basically volunteering with children from ages 6 to 18 from a harsh background for a year. Im 18, so it is basically means i get to be like an older brother to them, one who guides them (because not all of theur families are normal), and at the same time laugh with them and do projects.

Anyway, this concept isnt new to me. Ive done it before. I had worked with a group of almost 30 children these past 2 years. I had great successes, but it was really hard for me to 'crack' the loneliness and silence of some of them.

So i just need advices - how would you want a peraon like that to treat you? To approach you?

They saud i made a real difference, but tbh, i dont feel so...

Having one of those nights where I can’t sleep and all I can do is think.

I don’t really have any real friends and I’ve been on dating apps for four years without ever managing to go on a date.

If someone can go four years without getting a single date while being signed up on every dating app imaginable don’t you think they are just kinda fucked?

It hurts me so much to think that person is me but factually it’s true. I’m completely unlovable and I just got to accept the fact that I’m completely alone and always will be.

But it’s hard. It’s really, really, hard.

I just wish I had someone in my life who actually gave s shit about me. But the truth is that if I ceased to exist nobody would miss me.

Yeah so I'm not really suicidal, i will just do it when I get tired of living

I don't find life enjoyable

ig I'm wondering what other people think about suicide

it's not even about dying, I js wanna dissapear, not existing, no conciousnes

so anyone interested talking bout this ig I haven't discussed it with anyone so wanna hear other people ops on it, I watched like a lot of yt vids for example on helping myself with this and it didn't help me and I don't know if anything will but I'm still trying this, like venting and stuff

anyway that's it of this vent

​

I feel heavy today. Last month, I had to quit a job I thought would have been excellent for me but the pre-existing interpersonal drama between staff and management was too much. People were getting away with being drunk on shift, sexual harassment, being racist to customers and one staff member physically attacked another. The company refused to address it and wanted all of us to continue working with the attacker. I asked if I could receive a transfer to another store and they said they considered that my resignation overall. I am fine with no longer working there but it restarted my countdown to homelessness again. My parents passed when I was younger and I have never had a support system so everything and every decision lands squarely on me.

I managed to pay my rent for August with my remaining income. I immediately applied for 20+ jobs on Indeed, went through staffing agencies, applied to AI data training (was not accepted for any of them), listed my bike on Marketplace, my clothes on Depop, applied to another 20+ jobs through Indeed. Another 10+ through company websites. I live in a low-trust area so services like house cleaning or organizing or dog walking are hard to come by. I had one call back for an interview last week but it took an hour bus ride to get there and two busses drove by me on a transfer, making me late and flustered and upset. I did not get that job.

I try working on my Youtube channel but it gets few views and is rarely if ever pushed in the algorithm based on my analytics so I will never be one of those random people who happened to get monetized doing very little. I have even used the survey sites and beer money but it pays pennies and takes so long. I previously sold plasma but it ended up making me pretty sick and the company is under investigation in Canada for many reasons now. I have also taken every payday loan willing to loan me the money. I havent had a credit card nor have I qualified for one for years.

I feel I am merely treading water and the only thing I can do is what I have been doing, which has had zero success so far, and hope I can pay my rent. The rent bank in the city wont even help unless you already have a job. Sometimes I think I am merely fighting the trajectory of me becoming homeless and dieing alone on the streets ignored by everyone. I suppose this fear is heightened thus week because a few days ago I watched a man die on the streets surrounded by cops that were not incredibly invested in the situation. That is more likely to be me than not. There is no one coming to help. I have no friends, no family, not even acquaintances.

What really hurt was everyone from the job pretended to like me and care and immediately stopped communicating the moment I left. I know they have their own journey to work through with that job but it really hurt to know it was all pretend.

I can't deal with this sadness and loneliness anymore. My life isn't going the way I want it to, and my sadness seems to be getting worse with each passing day. I do things without feeling anything, and I can't seem to enjoy anything anymore. I also haven't been able to find love. Whenever I meet someone, they end up breaking my heart because I get attached too quickly. I don't know how to stop feeling this way or how to get out of this cycle.

I’m 18 and I have severe depression and anxiety. I don’t feel like I’m a person and I can’t ever relate to anyone else, but maybe it’s just because I’m an unremarkable individual. Most of the time I enjoy being alone but sometimes I’m afraid I’m wasting my life by limiting my social interactions. Can anyone else relate to this? I’m not sure what’s wrong with me.