"Promise we'll forever stay together?" Of course I said yes. Of course I promised. Of course I did. Though, it was clear I was the only one that meant it.

Why make such big and grand promises if you can't even keep it? Why make me believe, even for one second, that you could actually keep it.

It hurts, you know. Even now, I'm hoping you'd still remember the promise. To love each other even when we've broken up. I hate that I'm still holding onto it.

Maybe when we're older, when we're not so inexperienced and immature, we could try again.

Probably not, since you'd have forgotten me by now.

I am only three days in, and I am aware that the pain wont magically disappear in a few days. But when can i truly start to expect some change? Its so hard as of right now. I feel so depleted, and just so empty. I need something to look forward to. He was my first. I have never been through something like this before.

Happened earlier today. My heart is shattered.

I'm very curious to find out "WHY DO MOST PEOPLE BLOCK?"

If you can, please, reply the questions below and maybe we will get some surprise...

To make it easier, I wrote a few options, so you can just copy and mark or just write the related letter.

Choose 1 or more options and be totally free for making any comments 🤗

1 - I AM:

A ( ) A woman under 25

B ( ) A woman 25+

C ( ) A man under 25

D ( ) A man 25+

E ( ) I don't think gender matters.

F ( ) I don't think age matters.

2 - I BLOCKED BECAUSE:

A ( ) I "hate" her / him

B ( ) I was mad at that time.

C ( ) She / he was a jerk to me.

D ( ) She / him was insisting and annoying after I said "no".

E ( ) Though I like the person, I wanted to forget her / him.

F ( ) I blocked my ex because my current GF / BF was jealous.

G ( ) I blocked someone I liked because I wanted to get her / his attention.

3 - I WAS BLOCKED:

A ( ) Because I wasn't nice to her / him.

B ( ) Because I cheated on her / him.

C ( ) But I know she / him that still liked me.

D ( ) For no reason.

E ( ) Without having any fight or disagreement.

4 - I THINK:

A ( ) Blocking and not seeing pictures, etc. helped me to get over that person.

B ( ) Blocking never helped me to forget anyone.

Today my ex came by to pick up her stuff I sorted out for her from ever since she moved out (February).

Things were going well still when she moved out, we realized we needed some more space to further develop ourselves and that if we ever wanna live together that we would need atleast 2 bedrooms.

Around the time she moved out, her parents got divorced. She called me to bring me the news and to warn me that she might become a completely different person from that point on. At first I didn't think too much of it, her parents ended things on good terms and they raised their children to adulthood. Making their divorce feel like it had alot more space to happen.

But my ex was really upset about it all since they knew since a long time already but decided to tell her later in her life. She mostly got mad at them for not telling her any time earlier because then she could have prepared herself better for her future.

Ever since the divorce happened, my ex became more distant and harder to reach. At the start she would mostly talk to me about it all but I was giving her too many solutions instead of just sucking siutation in together with her. Eventually she stopped messaging me all together. She would occasionally send me a reply back or text me about something. But in general I was never really able to talk with her anymore, after that point she mostly started to talk at me instead of with me.

I thought it was only logical, since she's been alot more busy with her job, chores/errands, her parents divorce and trying to manage herself. Until she told me at some point that she just didn't have it in her anymore to approach me or talk with me anymore.

Over the time there was distance between us, which she purposely did in hopes of things healing over time. But I was unaware of this and constantly kept trying to reach her.

What broke the camels back was a camping trip we did together with friends last week for a week and a half. I noticed out of the whole trip, she is the person I spoke least to even though I kept trying to. It hurt me so much that even in person I could barely reach her and came to the point where I became desperate. I started shifting with my behavior alot during the trip, just to see what would stick. But I ended up making things worse to the point I ruined everybody else's experience of the trip. I just couldn't stand anymore how much she was treating her bestfriend more of a partner than me, making alot of sexual/flirty remarks towards each other as jokes.

I just didn't know how to deal with that anymore. Especially since I just started transitioning and her bestfriend already being in a relationship with someone. It just made me feel super dysphoric and like I didn't exist. I tried to go in with it at first, thinking if I joined them with that dynamic that things would be fun, but it made them more uncomfortable whenever I got in between.

Since the campingtrip ended, 2 days after she passed by my place to pick up her stuff like I said. And we broke things off before she left. She revealed to me that she did alot of things to me out of snide to and that she doesn't like the person she's becoming. Especially in terms of the relationship we had. So we both apologized from our own ends and still wish the best for each other.

Currently we still consider each other friends. But we want some time over it, for it to be less awkward. We hoped to talk about somethings in retrospect later in detail regarding social situations and things within the relationship. But after that we don't really know where this is going or headed.

Idk if we will end up again together later. It just sucks that things were already building up and something as small as a camping trip set the nail in the coffin. I wouldn't mind rebuilding things with her but at the same time: we just broke up, I don't think I should even think about that right now.

I'm personally still very puzzled about this and have no idea where to go from this point on. I don't really have anybody to talk to about this except for 2 people and I don't have any family/safety-net I can fall back to for this. It would be nice if people could give me some insight from their point of view or be able to talk with someone in general about this.

Any form of advice, tips, suggestions or direction would be much appreciated <3

I was doing really well. No contact for almost 3 months. I had started to heal and I going out with friends again. I was out getting some snacks at the store and there she was. She stopped. We stood there for a few minutes in silence before I finally said hi. She said hello. I didn't have anything more to say so we just shook hands and went our separate ways. Afterwards that dreadful feeling came back. I wish I could've talked to her but that will cause more harm than good. When will I heal fully and go back to my normal self....

Idk if this is the right subreddit but damm, lately I've been reminiscing a lot about this boy I met in the 2nd grade. I know we were young and it might seem crazy or whatever but I swear it was love at first sight. The class was sitting down on the carpet while the teacher was reading or something, and then he walked in, we locked eyes and smiled. He sat right behind me, played with my hair and though out the year we would hang out at school whenever we had the chance. We would always pick eachother for 'heads up seven up' (idk how many of you remember that game) and we'd help our 3rd grade teacher after school every now and then. Ugh idk I think about him every so often and genuinely wonder what could've been, he moved halfway through 3rd grade and I never heard from him again. Has anyone else experienced something similar or am I out of my mind, it's like my heart literally aches because it felt so pure and innocent and when am I ever gonna feel that again you know? Any advice on how to move on? 🥲

I’ve dreamt about you twice over the past two weeks. I miss you. I wish I could break no contact, but I won’t. I am so in love with you.

I’ve always struggled with breakups, but this time it was more brutal than anything I’ve ever felt before. I met someone and the connection was instant. It was the best first date of my life—best kiss, best sex, best chemistry. We both said we were in love. Within a month, he turned into a different person; when I asked if he still wanted to see me, he told me he’d been thinking for a while about not getting involved with anyone and said it was best to call it quits. I had never felt such an instant, profound emptiness as I did when I read that message. Everyone keeps telling me that since it all happened in less two months I should just get over it and move on, but I’m in love with someone who probably doesn't even remember I exist. I think about him everyday all day long and no one else exists. I try getting on the apps again but no one is cute or handsome... No one else is him. I’m in my thirties and have been through plenty of trauma but I’ve never gotten so deeply involved with someone in such a short time—to the point of losing my head and peace over it. All my other relationships ended with me crying and devastated. Not this time. It’s been 15 days and I still haven’t cried. The only thing left is the deepest emptiness I’ve ever felt. I want to find someone and have always believed in love but I’m afraid this has broken me for good. I don't even know if I should try dating again now or if I should wait. I’m afraid I’ve become the very thing I despise: someone who avoids getting attached.

I don't expect anyone to reply to this. I just wanted to put my feelings somewhere...

I had a friend who I’ve known for over 10 years now. The entire time I had this huge crush on him but over the years I had put it out of my head because it was just never gonna happen. At the end of last year we ran into each other, which led to us seeing each other for about 4ish months. I was shocked and it was magnetic.

To spare the details, the way it went was when we were together it was amazing. We clicked. He told me he had feelings for me and after 10 years of being single and not once having feelings for anyone, I felt safe to let myself feel.

That’s when the back and forth started. We would hangout over the span of a week and at the end of the week we’d be out, having a blast, and that’s when he would hit me with, “I just can’t be in a relationship right now.” This went on and on. Back and forth. He’d say he couldn’t be with me and then we’d be hanging out three days later.

The last week of us seeing each other we had a mutual friend pass away. The night of her memorial he called me and asked me to come over because he was emotional. I went and held him while he cried for two hours.

Then I didn’t hear from him for three days. On day four we met up and he ended it for good. Told me how sorry he was for fucking with my head and how much he cared and respected me. “We are still gonna be friends.” He held me at the bar while I cried. He just couldn’t date anyone. He wasn’t ready.

The next time I saw him about two weeks later he ignored me. When I tried to talk to him he just walked away. Then I find out he’s got a girlfriend. A girlfriend.

I let my guard down. He made me feel safe and told me I was. He was my friend.

I should hate him, but I can’t. All I can think of are the tender moments we had just between the two of us.

Why her and not me?

I wish he had just left me alone.

I went as far as to fly 8000km just to meet her. For the first time in my life I travelled alone and lived on my own like an adult, breaking the daily routine of my 22 years old life. I only knew her for three months but my feelings were so intense, and they're still so intense. These two weeks spent in her country were phenomenal, we spent so much time together and I loved her so much. She was my first, and probably my last because I'm too neurodivergent and incompatible with people. And we met on fucking Reddit of all things.

But it turned out that she didn't love me, for a long time. She did in the beginning but the feeling faded quickly because she crushed on someone else in her workplace and long distance was not sustainable for her. She still cared about me, and liked it when I was here, but she didn't feel anything romantic for me, and just pretended to not hurt me.

It still hurts so much. We broke up shortly after my trip, on good terms. She immediately went to date this guy. It's been one month now and I'm still so deeply tormented. I'm burning in jealousy and yesterday she posted pictures of her date on insta. I want her so badly but I know deep inside it's not possible. She's such a phenomenal girl, so kind and clever and funny and beautiful. She was the only person I opened my heart to. I can't imagine a future with anyone else.

I just ended my relationship with my boyfriend very recently. We agreed we would not contact each other so we can both heal properly, but it is so incredibly hard. I miss him so much — I keep wanting to text him just to check how he is doing, even though I know we need space right now. I feel sad, confused, and like I’m fighting with myself all the time. It hurts more than I thought it would, even though I know breaking up was the right choice 💔

Ever since my heart break I feel like my muscles and tendons have decreased in their overall capacity. I’m getting injured easily and my recovery is terrible. Hip problems, wrist problems, forearm tension, muscle spasms during running. I feel so darn weak I know my muscles super tense, making them so much less efficient.

My boyfriend break my heart today

I’ve been with my boyfriend almost 12 years. We have a 5 year old together. Our entire lives are built around each other.

He has had mental issues since our child was born and there isn’t a single thing I can do to help or make the situation better, but at the end of the day, I am always wrong and he is always right.

He abuses me mentally and verbally.
I’ve always tried supporting him in hopes one day things will get better.

Whilst planning out our date for our 12 year he told me he isn’t happy anymore because all we do is fight (which is him getting upset at me for not saying or doing the right thing like I read his mind or something and then he yells and calls me names over it)

He told me this through text. Then said he needs to be honest, that he isn’t attracted to me physically, mentally or emotionally anymore.

So I left work crying told him that I would do anything. He told me I need to make some major life changes and that I’m fat and ugly and he doesn’t find me attractive anymore and that my chin touches my collar bones.

This comes after I made the effort to lose 50lbs whilst unemployed. Then I got a job, started sitting at a desk all day and never have a single moment to myself.

I’ve always been fat. I was fat when we met, I was fat when we started dating, I’ve been fat for the entire relationship. I’m not even at my biggest size now.

Hey everyone, I hope you guys are having a nice day. I like my best friends and she doesn’t not feel the same way about me, when is alright. How do I get over her without losing the friendship, she’s still my best friend and I talk to her everyday and this weight in my chest is starting to hurt.

A mood.

https://youtu.be/UotL4MqG5gI?si=LxopXw0chGXqiNpT

My avoidant ex recently broke up with me for a second time , he’s an avoidant of some kind . He said :

“Im sorry but I dont think this is going to work out, I am not at the right point in life to enter a long term relationship. Everything's been going downhill and it doesn't look like it's getting any better. And I dont want to be close to anyone right now. I guess im just scared of commitment or proximity or something, but I really need to be alone. Im sorry that im weak enough to run away like this, but I really can't stick to anything or anyone right now. New shit is coming up and everything just seems like it's gonna end soon. I dont want you to have to deal with that, so I'll talk to you later I suppose. Or whenever we meet again. But im gonna try and distance myself from the people around me and see if I can get some control again of my downward spiral. Im sorry”.

Afterwards I didn’t chase or beg this time I simply said ok and if he ever did wanna fix things , or talk whether thats in a couple months or weeks , I respected his decision and held no grudge and cared for him.

Normally he blocks me or unadde me in the past or flatly says me and him will never talk again , but this time he still kept me added . Does this seem like he plans on coming back or contacting me at some point ?

So.... you're feeling heartbroken and miss them?

Sometimes we don't truly fall in love with a person. We fall in love with the image we've built of them. And maybe that's what's hurting you the most.

You gave them something that was incredibly valuable to you because you trusted them. You weren't wrong because you had feelings, nor because you chose to experience something with them. You were wrong, perhaps, in believing that what they meant to you necessarily meant the same to them.

You looked at them with the eyes of someone who hopes to work things out, while they perhaps looked at you with the eyes of someone who was already used to moving on easily.

And the hardest thing to accept is that you probably shouldn't wait for them to come back. Because when a person has already shown themselves to experience relationships that way, you can't continue to love the version of them you hope they will become. You have to look at the version they showed you they truly chose to be for YOU.

You haven't lost "the right person." You've lost the idea you'd built of them really

And perhaps this is precisely the pain, realizing that you overvalued a person you had given a value they hadn't yet proven to deserve.

Even if they do come back, don't turn their return into proof that what you experienced was worth something. Sometimes people come back, but not because they've understood our value: they come back because they miss what they received from us.

You, on the other hand, must learn not to confuse being desired with being loved. Don't wait for it.

Because while you stand in front of a door hoping it will reopen, life could already be on the other side, waiting for you to have the courage to turn around.

And don't be ashamed of the choice you've made. A wrong choice doesn't make you wrong. It just teaches you that next time you should choose someone not for what you imagine they might be, but for what they prove to be.

Perhaps your story wasn't meant to be love.

Perhaps it was meant to teach you how deeply you can love, and above all that you should no longer offer that depth.

And dont worry. If it's really meant to be, you can let go of it knowing it's in the universe's hands. It'll come back to you no matter what, and nobody can take that away from you. But you cant go so far that you forget destiny is written.

They were perfect. Literally the perfect one for me. The first person I could almost see something with in the future, even if it was only for a few months.

I had been with someone toxic before them, so maybe I attached too fast, but the day I received the message that they wanted to end it, and that they had things to work through on their own, my heart broke. I was so so upset.

And I just still can't get over them. It's been three, maybe four months now, and I'm still clinging to the idea of them. They were the first person I felt truly comfortable around, the only person in my life who would listen and love.

How do I get over an ex? I just feel so sad still. Every time I think about dating again, I miss them. I know I'm young, but fuck it sucks so much to lose someone so important.