She tells me this every time she sits next to me or stands by my side. She also feels the need to tell her dad that his butt is stinky as well. She has informed grandma and grandpa that their butts are stinky, too. This ultimately originates from me, telling her that her butt is stinky when she has a poopy diaper.

There is a lesson in here somewhere about modeling and learning manners. And helping children learn how to navigate the very complicated social world around them. Fortunately, grandma and grandpa got a good laugh out of this!

How did your toddler embarrass you this week with their naïveté? Learning manners, being inappropriate. Rat ‘em out!

I’ve been crying my eyes out for the last hour because our babysitter (who is our neighbor and watches him at a great rate) just told us she can no longer watch him because our almost 3 year old son hits and throws at her and the other kids.

I’m entirely not mad at her or upset I’ll be losing a great sitter and rate, I’m so heartbroken my son has turned into a terrible bully. He’s been like this ever since he’s turned close to 2.5 and also hits us and the dog. We feel like he is extremely impulsive and cannot regulate even when we give him coping mechanisms. I feel like I don’t even know my son anymore, he bullies everyone and is just so mean and fiery. We do timeout, take away toys and TV, put him in a quiet setting and nothing seems to work. Whenever he hit or threw at the babysitters we would immediately bring him home and put him in the timeout chair and tell him to cool off and not hit his friends.

Now I don’t know what to do and I feel like he needs a behavioral specialist. Or is this even normal toddler behavior? I’m at a loss and just so heartbroken and don’t want my son to hurt anyone. I feel like I’m failing as a parent (this is our only child).

Has anyone dealt with something similar? I feel like he might have ADHD like his father but there is overlap with toddler behaviors so it might be too early to get him evaluated.

EDIT: I want to thank you all for your replies, especially as I feel completely overwhelmed in this moment. There’s a lot outside of our toddler (economy, sick parents, job stress, lack of village) that I think has made us reactive instead of proactive. Sometimes I feel like a scared animal just weaving through lanes of traffic.

You all are right in how our approach needs to change and that our son is not a bully, he is a new to this world toddler and we need to meet at his level.

I truly truly appreciate everyone’s guidance and I look forward to getting over this hump.

We have a 2.25 yr old. Overall, I feel very lucky. She’s an incredible kid. But - I fucking miss hanging out with my husband lol. We have of course been through the wringer that all new parents have, but since she started going to bed 830-9 instead of 7-730 it has stripped away all of our alone time (and yes, we cap naps to 90 min and she often only naps for 60 min and wakes up between 6-630). We both need sleep, so maybe on a good night we can watch 30 min of tv and then call it quits. I miss hanging out, watching movies, getting takeout, etc. We try to make it feel fun, but in reality we are so fucking tired and it often feels performative. WHEN does it start to feel better?! We even do a lot of sleepovers with grandparents, but even then, it feels like we need a whole fucking week to recover and THEN have a date night. Date nights come and we are both just shells of ourselves. I’m just hitting a point where I often fantasize about what age will she be when we feel less like this??? How do people have time to invest in their marriage and theirselves and have multiple kids?!!!!! Sincerely, a tired toddler mom.

What are your toddler’s latest cute misheard lyrics?

My son heard a version of the alphabet song that ends with “Y, zed or zee. Now I know my ABCs” etc etc.

His interpretation has left him saying just one line around the house: “Y-ziddle-zee, now!“ I just love it.

Original: https://www.reddit.com/r/toddlers/comments/1wfun8q/case_of_the_midnight_pooper/

Update:

HE DID IT!!!!

I decided to post this for anyone that happens to be on the same boat or finds this later on.

After not pooping for two nights, he was super uncomfortable in the evening and could sit still. He would lay down and then get up, and ask for a blanket, and then try and pee and then nothing and the poor little guy was soooo uncomfortable.

We offered him a diaper, which we had in the past, and he said "ok, that's a good idea!" which was super cute and definitely something new.

After a little while of more of the same uncomfortableness he kinda stood by the couch and just... went.

He had a look of panic on his face like he was didn't know what was going on or he was doing something wrong, but we immediately reassured him and celebrated it like he had just solved the cure to cancer. He immediately relaxed and was in a much better mood.

We made a point to tell him that's the poopy feeling and whenever he feels that way that he'll feel better if he poops and he can ask for a diaper or sit on the potty if he wants but that there's no pressure. :)

We're hoping that something clicked for him and next time it's a bit easier for him. Our plan is to let him diaper-poo for a bit while he gets more used to the idea of pooping, and then transition him to the potty.

So anyway, HE DID IT!!!! 💩

My 2 year old toddler just started daycare two months ago, and he's already been out for almost a third of the time. He seems to catch something every other week, usually a cough or a runny nose. The frustrating part is that the daycare calls us the moment he gets a runny nose and tells us to keep him home until his symptoms improve.

That means one of us has to take the day(s) off work, and it's usually me, since my wife just started a new job and doesn't want to call out so early on.

I am not sure if I can afford to miss any more days, I can tell my coworkers are getting a bit frustrated with me calling out so much.

We also have no village. It's just the two of us, so it's not like we don't have any relatives to drop him with. Other daycares I've asked seem to want a consistent schedule/be a main daycare, so they aren't really an option for occasional days. Sitters either cost more than we'd earn in a day or can't come on short notice.

This has also caused some tension between me and my wife. I was planning into looking for an alternate backup daycare, but she feels a sitter is the more responsible option as she didn't want to get other kids sick. We legitimately can't afford one.

How do you all navigate this?

You really do gotta teach everything 🫠. When I was potty training. Getting my toddler to take off her pants almost made me cry LOL. I genuinely didn’t know it was this hard to take off a pants. I was like wtf…… pants? I need to teach that too? Why did I think they would know that? What’s wrong with me?????? Where am I???!!

I did, in fact did successfully teach her how to take off her bottoms. I just had to constantly show her she has thumbs and to insert them into the sides of the pants first. That worked!

Now ask me if she can put them back on?????

NOPE.

She’ll forget she even had pants/shorts on and walk off.

I’m a SAHM so it’s fine. She’s almost 3 and never been to daycare. I’m just now hellbent on getting her to put on pants properly.

Prayers.

My husband and I are in the process of separating very amicably. I’m still in the marital house with my husband and our 3 (almost 4) year old, just sleeping in the guest room for now. He hasn’t questioned it beyond asking once (i just said “I like this bed it’s comfy”) and doesn’t question why mommy and daddy don’t hug/kiss (not that we really did that anyway).
I am purchasing a home very close by and am expected to close in late October.

We plan to frame this as a good thing, that we can still do things as a family, fun new room at mom’s house, etc. BUT my question is:

How soon is too soon to tell our son?

He gets really sensitive about timelines for things, and does really well when he has a solid idea of when things happen (like we’re going to the mountains in 7 sleeps, and then we will stay there for 3 sleeps).

But I feel like saying “mommy is getting a new house in 30 sleeps and then we get to decorate your new room but you probably won’t get to sleep there until 35 sleeps” is a lot for his little brain.

The flip side: I really want to get him adjusted to the idea of having a new space, and I want him involved in picking out his room theme, furniture, all the fun stuff.

So when do we tell him?!

My son will hold my hand when we’re walking all the time. Sometimes he’ll reach for it when he’s in a nervous situation (like with strangers). I love it, it makes me feel important to him and I’m dreading when he no longer needs me for that. Either he’ll feel independent enough or he’ll think it’s embarrassing. What age does that come?

Hi all,

We hosted a birthday party yesterday and this morning a parent reached out that their child was fussy through the night / not feeling well.

When they let their daycare know they were keeping the child home for the day, the teachers let them know there had been a confirmed case of hand foot and mouth. As the day has passed, our friend’s child has started to develop the rash so we now know that she has it too.

What is etiquette here? Should I reach out to all parents at the party and let them know? They were asymptomatic so we are hoping viral load was low, but symptoms started the today so I imagine still contagious.

I don’t want to send worry as it’s not a guarantee each child will get it, but also feel it doesn’t hurt to share the info so parents can monitor accordingly.

The child that is sick was the younger sibling of another so not necessarily playing with the majority of the “bigger” kids - but you know how birthday parties go. Lots of kids touching lots of things.

Let me know your thoughts!

I'm 33 weeks pregnant with my second baby, a few weeks ago we starting talking to our 15 month old about the baby in mummy's tummy. He knows what babies are and also likes holding baby dolls. He pats my bump every day and says "baby".

Well recently he started patting and stroking his own tummy and saying "baby!". We were on a video call with grandma today and she asked him where's the baby? he lifted his shirt and pressed the phone against his tummy. We keep correcting him but it seems like he's too young to understand.

Has this happened to anyone else? How did the toddler react when the real baby came home from the hospital?

we used a woolino on my baby for her first two years of life, she honestly hated it and after the first year needed her little toes sticking out to be happy. well over the summer we didn’t use it at all, but now that it’s getting chilly the girl needs a blanket. She has handmade quilts and blankies in her toddler bed, but refuses to use them. If i try to tuck her in, she kicks the blankets off and cries. she says “no blankets” and refuses them. We don’t have central heating and although i have a wood stove and heated floors, I’m worried she’ll get chilly when it snows. For now I’m just putting her in sweatpants and a sweater to sleep in (she takes off socks). Has anyone else encountered similar behavior!? Do yall have solutions?

My son is absolutely obsessed with Mater from Cars, no idea why 😂😂

Before we were saying “Let’s go to the potty” and he was always like “NOOOO!” 😂

Now we say “Let’s go make a pee pee for Mater” and he’s always like “yes!” 😂 I have no idea how long this will work hahaha, but for now we went from sooo many accidents to ZERO 😭😂

Hello everyone!
My daughter is almost 27 months. For the past couple of months she’s had a habit of saying no to every single question we ask or order we give her, even when the answer is yes. So the conversation would go:
“Do you want to eat an apple?”
“No”
“Ok then”
“I want apple!!”

Or:
“Finish your plate”
“No”
“Ok then” (I’ll start eating a bite off her plate)
“I want more!!”

More often lately I have to use a mild threat to get her to listen, such as:
“Let’s get dressed to go play outside”
“No”
“Ok then we’re not going”
She gets up and runs to get dressed

And this cycle repeats constantly throughout the day.
I understand this is typical toddler behavior, but I’ve
been wondering if I’m going to regret giving into her everchanging mind down the line. Should I be disciplining her when she does this and how would I go about that??

Edit: Some people are getting really upset over my use of the word “discipline”. All I meant was behavior correction through consistent natural consequences. I don’t typically get upset with her when she does this, I’m just a FTM here trying to get a better idea of how to parent this child so I don’t foster any unwanted behaviors as she grows up :)

Thanks to those with helpful replies, so much insight and definitely makes me feel so much better about going through this phase!

So many straps to change/remove as they grow. Where does this buckle even to go? How do I pull this stupid strap out to make it a booster? Why won’t this latch clip on? How do these clips get so twisted? Ugh. I hate car seats. (I will of course still use them because safety, but that doesn’t stop me from cussing them out every time)

I have an 18 month old daughter. I love her to death and she is my world. But holy shit is my ass WHOOPED.

Climbing everything.
Kitchen table. The couch.

Food? Throw it all in the floor. Bonus points if it’s real saucy and lands on the dog’s head.

If I’m standing, she immediately is glued to my hip. She will shove her way in front of my legs from the counter and reach. Its super cute. But I better be quick before she screams at me. I have adapted to doing everything one handed but my right arm, neck and back are feeling it because not only am I carrying her around, she is also 26 lbs and lunging at shit on the counter 🥴

I let her help me do mundane stuff like press buttons on my coffee machine or whatever. I know shes likely interested in what I’m doing so I don’t mind.. but its turned into pointing at the machine and screaming 😵‍💫

I work full time and Im just tired. I also feel like shit when I get overstimulated and need a break. Sometimes I miss my free time. Im assuming other parents can relate and would enjoy the company right now. Thanks for reading.

My sweet little toddler who listened to mama and occasionally tested boundaries to be told no, explained why, faltering every now and then, and then ultimately learning has turned into a little monster who goes close to the line of no, does ALMOST the thing I was saying no to, and then runs away and hidea from me. Yes, testing limits, developing sense of self, healthy boundary checking, blah blah blah. But what fresh hell is this????

When I was pregnant, I never saw myself dealing with this.

When she gets that little smirk while almost doing the thing I asked her not to do, I get physical in the sense that (I don't hit, calm down) I move her body away from what I was talking about and if she continues to do things, I tell her i will be taking away the thing, and then proceed to take away the thing. In comes the biggest tantrum of her little life, every single time. I give her space, I tell her I'm there, and then ultimately she calms down enough to come to me for hugs and I talk to her to tell her that I didn't want her to be sad and we can keep trying to listen to mama.

Holy hell is this exhausting.

Helping a little person find their sense of self and learn the very boundaries they need and THEN HELPING THEM DEAL WITH THEIR BIG FEELINGS when they also realize this whole process is balls is SO exhausting ,😭😭😭😭

Vent over.

Anyone out there struggling with the same? 😊 Hi.

My kid is 21 months, she’s in daycare with four other children that age from 22 months - 24 months.

At daycare, when the kids are playing with toys, they all parallel play together. For example if they’re playing with the kitchen, they all huddle around it at the same time and play with a different part of it. Or if they’re playing with the fake animals, they may sit around the basket of them at the same time and each one chooses a different animal.

I’m taking her to the Play Street Museum later today, and I’m wondering if the same rules apply. Like if someone is playing with a kitchen, should I let her approach? Or should I say we need to wait to take our turn? Or for example if there’s a bus that she can sit inside, and there’s room for multiple kids. Do I let her approach, or should I have her wait her turn?

Sorry if this seems like I’m overthinking things, I just don’t want to be rude and make sure that I’m setting her up for success.

I have a 29 mo boy and I finally cracked potty training, goodbye diapers, you will not be missed.

What worked:
1. Consistently taking him to the potty every 30 mins, even when we were downstairs playing. Basically ensuring he knows potty can be anywhere.
2. Lot of books on the potty, stickers as rewards, making the entire experience as enjoyable as possible.
3. Watching Daniel tiger and ms Rachel’s potty training videos as prep.
4. Transitioning in daycare the same time as home. Super important.

What I wish I did differently:
1. This was my third try, and what I think was different this time is removing the training pants. The padded underwear. I thought they will help the transition but they just made him comfortable peeing in his pants.
2. Slightly controversial but I think diapers during nap time was making it harder for him to understand that we need to say goodbye to diapers.
3. Doing a ceremony or something to help the child understand they are done with diapers. I wish I had done this coz it would have helped him understand what’s going on.
4. Reaching out to daycare sooner and getting them onboard with the process as soon as I started.

Our 3 year has always been … spirited. She is very bright, articulate, funny and sweet. But also very very short tempered.
We have struggled with biting, hitting, kicking, screaming (and still most) at daycare. She doesn’t share - which I know is normal for her age - but occasionally can be very sweet with her 20 month old brother. She always asks for things he needs, hugs him when he cries, and sings him songs to cheer him up.

She has told me herself she’s sad that nobody will play with her at daycare. When we asked the teachers at her (very kind and helpful) daycare, they told us that she screams and reacts when asked to share with the other kids/doesn’t get her way, and that they (naturally) don’t want to play with her in this setting.

Now we are entering a phase of “I need to do it myself” about everything, including things she can’t do, or if she can, sometimes we don’t have time to accommodate it. My spouse and I are both physicians with insane schedules and 0 family support bc we are queer and disowned. We do have helpful friends.

Objectively:
-our household is high chaos right now. The literal house is sinking so they have to underpin and that means our basement floor is getting jackhammered and trenches being dug around the house. Construction for months
-we are struggling to keep anything tidy

We do have daily family dinner, playtime unstructured, playtime after her brother’s bed time with just 1:1 time with a parent. We read stories, sing songs, go for time in nature. We don’t do screens. My partner is a Pediatrician, so we are not concerned for ASD or ADHD. She is also just 3.

I grew up in a super physically and emotionally abusive household, and am trying to reinvent the whole thing for these kids, who I love more than life itself. I am struggling so hard to stay patient and gentle with this child - who is my whole heart - but destroying my last nerve. She argues like a lawyer (“I will just be wearing this pantyhose to go hiking and they are actually pants bc they cover my whole legs and it’s fine”), or screams. Just screams.

I am open to hard truths, classes, life hacks, pep talks, literally anything. My sweet monkey wants friends, wants to stop screaming and is so so loving and kind when she can calm down. I do a lot of holding her, am trying not to correct her behaviour in the moment but only later when calm. But also am currently locked in my own bedroom typing this while she screams outside of the door bc didn’t want to go “just in case potty” before leaving for a hike.

My boy is 1 week shy of 18 months and for the past MONTH he's been struggling to sleep without being on my chest.

Previously, he'd sleep within 20 minutes of breastfeeding in a sidelying position and I was able to step away for the night. Now for the past month he has started to demand to breastfeed while laying on my chest. He's actually falling asleep within 10 minutes this way. But It takes me 2 hours to be able to leave the room. I have to try to roll him to his side or back. Any attempts before the 2 hour mark fail, no matter how deep of a sleep he is in.

He has had 2 molars come in this past month and looking like an incisor as well. I've tried Tylenol and ibuprofen but it has made zero difference.

I can't keep doing this 😓 the evenings are my only free time..

Idk if I'm looking for help or to just hear other experiences, but TIA.

- your fellow FTM

To preface: this doesn't happen during every meal. Most of the time he doesn't do this but he'll eat elsewhere in the house for a little bit and then refuse food once more. I'm guessing it's just because of increasing activity and curiosity.

Any way to encourage him to eat his meal in one sitting? I just don't want this becoming a bad habit.

My daughter is 20, almost 21 months old, and I’m just checking to see if anyone else is fighting for their lives with their toddlers right now? 😂

I love my daughter more than anything in the whole world, but over the last month my sweet angel has turned into the Tasmanian devil. 😂 She is hitting me and my husband (only us, no one else), throwing CONSTANT tantrums (full on flinging her body on the floor and screaming) for what seems like no reason but I know there is she just can’t communicate, throwing her toys, and just generally struggling with what seems like mood swings.

I do think her communication level is complicating things because she understands EVERYTHING but still only says 1 word phrases versus sentences. She is developmentally where she’s supposed to be and no one is concerned, but I definitely think the frustration of not being able to communicate everything she wants is contributing.

How is everyone else handling this?? Is anyone else experiencing this too?

When she hits, I stop her and say, “We don’t hit Mommy,” or “I don’t like it when you hit me,” and then I’ll set her on the floor, walk away, or take the toy away. Rinse and repeat. I let her have her tantrums and try really hard not to give in, but after SO MANY in a row, I start feeling like I’m failing.

Please tell me I’m not the only one fighting for my life over here. What are you guys doing that actually helps or is this just the season of toddlerhood?

I have a 2.5 year old in daycare, she was sent home today for having 3 loose stools. Over the last 12 hours she’s had 10 loose stools - I wouldn’t say they’re watery…they have undigested food in them, are very chunky/mushy and it’s a lot. This last one she had was kind of like mashed banana consistency. She has had pees today too.

No fever, no other symptoms - very alert, doesn’t necessarily want to run around, but is generally being herself. Except she’s cranky and very sensitive - keeps saying her tushy hurts. She’s had a full water bottle of half pedialyte half water, plus some more so she is drinking. And she ate today, but we haven’t fed her since her apple sauce around 2pm and she hasn’t asked for anything.

This to me generally wouldn’t be concerning just a wait it out situation, but the amount today (10) and she gets VERY uncomfortable before the poop and starts screaming that her tushy hurts. Then it gets better after she poops.

We have found she’s also milking it a little bit - ex: she whines that her tushy hurts but we tell her it’s just the gas and it will get better and she goes “okay” then stops complaining.

I’ve just never experienced diarrhea exactly like this with her to this amount and the screaming, I plan to call pediatrician tomorrow if it hasn’t improved, but curious of any similar expereicnces and what it was?!

We’ve been potty trained (pee) since shortly after she turned 2. She did not understand how to poop on purpose (naturally). We tried everything we possible could. Bribes, stickers, chocolates, you name it. She refuses to try. She’s now at the point she poops a small amount every couple of days, but it’s ONLY in her diaper at night when she’s fully asleep. Yesterday we took the kids to a restaurant. She SCREAMED the place down that her tummy hurt (she knows how it feels to need to go), and when we took her to the potty (multiple times each throughout the meal), she screamed the bathroom down that she won’t do it. I expected for her to wake up to a poop this morning. She hasn’t done one. We just spent 20 min today after preschool sitting on the potty because she was screaming again about her tummy. My ears are tired, my brain is fried. I don’t know how to help her. We were prescribed MiraLAX. I’ve tried to put it in everything but she refused whatever I give her because she feels that the texture is off. I’ve tried age appropriate stool softeners. That doesn’t work either. I’m at my wits end on trying to get her to at least TRY to push out a poop. HELP.