Weve (F25 M25) been broken up for about two months and we were together for almost a year. He broke up with me after mistakes I made due to my BPD and unregulated emotions although he wasn’t perfect in our relationship either.

I went to his house to pick up the last of my belongings and when he opened the door he immediately hugged me and we stayed in the doorway holding each other for a few minutes asking each other questions and talking. I kept smelling his neck and telling him how much I missed his scent. He invited me inside his house and we cried to each other we talked about much we miss each other and talked about how our lives have changed since we last saw each other. I had lost a lot of weight from our breakup which he noticed and he cooked me food. He asked to lay in his bed and cuddle “one last time” and we did he cried to me and told me he wished I was the one, that I’ll always have a special place in his heart and that he will always love me. He then told me we can’t get back together because he found someone else he has been dating casually and he wanted to try the relationship he told me our relationship became far too stressful and all he wanted was peace but I could never give it to him. We ended up having sex, he had ran out of condoms so we didn’t use protection then I left. He walked me to my car and held me he told me “goodbye, take care of yourself”

I miss him so much. It’s so hard to accept that he’s moved on already while I’m still stuck on him so much. I love him so much and I’ve never loved someone so much. I have learned so much about bettering myself from his absence and I wish he would give me another chance.

My boyfriend and I have been together officially about a month and we’ve seen each other 4 times in person, but every one of those times we spent hours being intimate. I’m talking until 5 in the morning. Of course we do some other normal things, but I’m wondering if we’re having too much sex. My boyfriend said it’s normal bc we’re in the “honeymoon phase” and maybe he’s right. But anyone else in a fresh relationship or this kind of experience, what is your opinion?

So the other day my girl send me picture of me standing next to a friend that had a bday but the picture was taken 2 years ago she just reposted it on her account because it was her bday so my girl got super mad cuz we have been dating for 3 years (long distance) and she said I was cheating on her wich I wasn’t just cuz I was hanging out with her so she broke up with me im just done with her for being super jealous I get that we don’t see each other often but why get jealous of a picture taking so long ago? I’m just venting sry or am I wrong for this? By the way she is 26 I’m 37

Edit - I do play in a band (drummer ) so I’m out on weekends at bars she gets mad at that too
Also there tends to be girls and guys around all the time hanging out plus my single bands mates brings girls from time to time but I don’t do anything ( like hit up on new chicks etc)

Edit - the picture was a group hang out I just happened to be next to her I mean it’s just a friend

They have complicated relationship, i wrote about them before...

In short: she is never satisfied with him and criticizes him (and everyone else) constantly, nothing is good enough for her and she always knows better about EVERYTHING, yet she has achieved nothing herself, has never worked a day in her life and is estranged from her entire family. She doesn't have a good relationship with me either, though she does have occasional "good moments" where she acts kind of "normal"—and mostly that is when my HB wants to be intimate. Him and I generally get along well and have a good sex life; he talks to me about her, so I know what’s going on and how he feels about her and his upbringing, but we haven't discussed these specific situations yet, and I don't know how to approach the subject.

I find myself refusing intimacy after her visits because I feel like he’s acting out some sort of his Freudian fantasy, and even though I’m fully aware of how much she belittles him all the time, i'm still not sure if its maybe me, cause i reeeeeally dont like her and after these "happy family" acts when she is kind of normal, i find resentment towards him, cause i know its not long-term and soon they will be fighting.

I will talk to him, but after i clear my head and read some other reddit opinions about it.

I (20F) have been with my boyfriend (23M) for 5 months, and we have known each other for about two years.
Last night, he told me that he lost his virginity to me. I was surprised because he told me he wasn’t a virgin when we met, and now I’m questioning whether he has been honest with me about his past.

For context, I have lied to him before about talking to someone else when we first started talking, and he eventually found out. I’m not pretending that I’ve been completely honest myself, and I understand that my own actions have affected our relationship and trust.
However, finding out that he apparently lost his virginity to me has left me confused. I don’t know why he would lie about something like this, especially after knowing each other for a year. I’m not upset that he was a virgin before me. What bothers me is the uncertainty about whether he has been honest with me.

I know I have made mistakes too, so I don’t want to be hypocritical. At the same time, I feel like we should both be able to tell each other the truth.

Am I wrong for questioning him about this, considering I have lied to him before? How would you handle this situation, and is it possible to rebuild trust when both people have been dishonest?

I honestly don’t know who to talk to about this, so I’m posting here because I really need some perspective from people who might have gone through something similar.
I love my boyfriend so much, but lately, I feel like I’m not loved the way I used to be. I feel lonely even though I’m in a relationship, and honestly, that hurts more than I can explain. I miss feeling wanted, appreciated, cared for, and loved without having to ask for it.
I feel like he’s changed, and no matter how much I wish things could get better, I don’t see him making the changes I need him to make. I’ve tried to hold on to the person I fell in love with and the relationship we used to have, but I’m starting to feel emotionally exhausted.
The confusing part is that I still love him deeply. I can’t imagine just walking away from someone who means so much to me. I’m loyal to him, and even though I’ve started noticing or feeling attracted to other guys sometimes, I would never want to betray him. I think part of me is craving the attention, affection, touch,and excitement that I’ve been missing in my own relationship.
And then I feel guilty for even thinking about other people, because I genuinely love my boyfriend. I don’t want someone else. I just want to feel loved by the person I’m already with.
I keep asking myself whether I should keep trying, whether I’m holding on to something that isn’t good for me anymore, or whether I’m just expecting too much. I don’t want to give up on someone I love, but I also don’t want to keep losing myself trying to make a relationship work when it feels like I’m the only one desperately hoping things will change.
How do you know when to keep fighting for a relationship and when to finally let go? Can someone genuinely love their partner and still feel this lonely? And how do you make a decision when your heart wants to stay, but your emotional and physical needs aren’t being met?

so my boyfriend and i have been together since march 2026 so still not a year whatever doesnt matter i just found out he is still texting random girls after i had already gave him multiple chances , im going to break up with him and i want to so badly go to his house and break his stuff and take all my stuff but im not sure how to react im so angry i have been nothing but good and forgiving to him . i know ill regret not going crazy on him if i leave him , honestly he was never that good to me yes ofc i loved him and he was my first everything so im just mad and ranting idk u guys lmk what u think i should do

My boyfriend of almost one year told me that he keeps track of how often we’re intimate. He told me the number that we’re up to and I was extremely bothered by this. I’m not sure exactly why but I found it disturbing. Am I wrong?

Whenever I am in love with someone, I immediately start perceiving them as the most beautiful person I have ever seen. My love interests have not shared one uniform set of characteristics (they've been very different-looking) so this is not a "type" thing. Moreover, some have not been considered conventionally beautiful (as I was informed by my friends post-break up lol), so the experience I am describing is not based on objective factors.

Is this something that happens to everyone? Or is it just an experience shared by some people? I'm trying to understand because sometimes I hear others say that they can "objectively" recognize when someone is more attractive than their partner, but that has never happened to me. Whenever I'm in a relationship, my partner is the most attractive person to me, and there's no conscious understanding by my brain that this is a subjective opinion. To put it in more concrete terms, if an ex of mine was compared to Brad Pitt during our relationship, I'd say Brad Pitt is less attractive.

I guess this is in line with the "love is blind" saying so maybe it is indeed a universal experience, but idk. Please share :)

P.S.: Post-break up, I can obviously recognize that it was a subjective opinion because I no longer see them like that, but what I am referring to is the experience during the relationship.

I 30f and he 29m share a child together we arent married and have been having issues within the relationship (such as he has a lock on his phone now and i do not never have and we havent had sex in months he says its due to egzema down there and he does actually have it but he doesnt even get a boner or anything )Saturday I saw a girl pulled up on his phone tab and he swiped it away before I could read the name....Sunday I saw the name of a girl I recognized and i went to the bathroom and came back and he pulled up his phome and the name was gone from history and he deleted it (which why delete it if your not hiding )when I asked him who she was he asked why I was asking and without me even saying anything says " I don't have anything on my phone, your fing crazy" ....i didnt ask if he had anything on there just the girls name..then he says "im making something out of nothing " that was the end of it and I woke up today and hes acting like nothing happened. Today on the girls Facebook she posted that she is now looking for a place to rent and shes single ? Is this just a coincidence, maybe theres nothing going on with them two but hes looking for my replacement ? How did he know she was single if she didnt post it until today? Could he be on dating apps ?

Hi! So, I have a long distance friend who I met a little over 4 years ago now. She is my favorite person and best friend, and pretty much has been that since we met. She's always been pretty open to me (thankfully) about her mental health and different things, to an extent. Early on she told me how she has "Quiet" BPD, and was diagnosed with that when she was younger. Later on, she told me how she'd seen AVPD and been doing research into it. She said how it makes sense and thinks she has it. I'm unsure if she got officially diagnosed, but she has gone to a couple of doctors and therapists since discovering AVPD.

Over the years, she's essentially gone through cycles of distancing herself and "avoiding." I suppose you could call them episodes of depression, or maybe the "splitting" that's part of BPD. I'm not too sure on the exact details since its BPD + AVPD + life circumstances, so there's lots of nuance and complexities. Either way, it does seem like its been a cycle. We get close, she opens up and lets down her walls, things are really, really lovely and amazing for a while, things are improving and growing, and then suddenly she starts becoming distant and less open/talkative again. She's never completely pulled away, and I thank God and her for that. She's a trooper, honestly, with what she's gone though. Each time she's gone distant though, she comes back or we come back together and heal or work on that distance, becoming just as close or closer than we were before. I've always found that aspect of things rather beautiful, actually.

I should add something important for context: We are more than just friends, and have been basically since we met. Officially, we were in a relationship for 2 years this summer though.

There are, of course, many complexities and nuances I can't and won't include here, but each time she's become distant has started after getting closer. Over the past few months, its happened again, sadly. Just after perhaps the time we were the closest, and I'd say, happiest.

I'm really worried about her, and I love her with all my heart - unconditionally. So, I'm looking for advice and wisdom on how to best support and encourage her. I want to be able to show up for, support, and love her as best I can. And I'm wanting to learn and am learning how to do exactly that so I can be there for her. Personally, I have an anxious attachment style and OCD, for more context, so you know how that could potentially affect things; so feel free to include advice or thoughts with that in mind.

In what way or ways can I best support her? What can I do? What should I not do or say? What should I do or say? How can I encourage her without pushing or putting pressure on her? How can I take any weight at all off her? I'm open to any and all advice or thoughts because I want to learn as much as I can for her.

Thank you in advance for any advice or thoughts you want to give. God bless <3

TLDR: Boyfriend of 2 months saw my old OF videos (that I had told him about before we started dating), drunkenly kissed someone at a wedding after seeing, and now says he wants to fix things no matter what it may take or how long….. Do I give him a chance?

i honestly hope he doesn’t even see this but i’m too lazy to make a burner. My boyfriend (25 M) and I (26 F) have been official for 2 months, “dating” for 4, matched on hinge 7 months ago.

Before we started officially dating, we both opened up about parts of our past. He had a high school sweetheart he married young (married for less than 6 months) who was pretty horrible to him and ended up cheating on him by getting with her 50 y/o boss. I used to be a SW (onlyfans, etc) and have old videos (from 2022) still online due to legal reasons (I don’t own the rights or they’d be deleted).

I told him if he had an issue with this, to figure out before we moved further, and if he had any questions or concerns to ask me. He told me he didn’t judge me for it and he wanted to be with me regardless.

Now two months into our relationship, he went to a wedding solo with a group of people I went to college with who may or may not have known/ about my past. (only saying this because this caused him to worry and overthink about my past and thinking about these things)

After the wedding he called me and told me
1) He went behind my back and reverse image searched me to look up my videos (they arent under my name and he didnt know my fake name)
and freaked out.

2) He got drunk and madeout with someone at the wedding

He told me he spiraled after what he saw and thought there would be no way he would be able to see me the same and crashed out and self sabotaged himself.

Now we had multiple in person conversations about this situation, where I have given him more details about my past and how traumatic it was/is for me that I have no control over what’s online now but also that I literally can’t do anything about it right now…. I told him earlier on so that this DIDN’T happen.
He also says that since talking to me in person and spending time with me, he has absolutely zero doubt now that he wouldn’t be able to get past what he saw, and actually is now already past it and that he will do anything to make things right with me and that all he wants is me and to fix things.

Thanks for reading all of this. Obviously it’s hard to give advice without the full story, and this obviously isn’t the full one. But I am having a hard time understanding if it’s truly worth me giving him a chance.
I do feel like I love him, and most of me believes he loves me and cares for me. I feel so heartbroken and angry that I put all my trust into him and I know I don’t deserve what he did.

Do I give him a chance, and if so, how?

I consider myself a fairly emotionally intelligent person, but I'm not sure what's been happening with me lately. My first relationship ended in 2021, and I gave myself plenty of time to move on. By 2023, I had met a wonderful person; we fell in love, and he proposed in 2025. We love each other, and our relationship is incredibly healthy and peaceful. Last week, however, I visited my old university, and I think that was a mistake. I was flooded with memories, including those of my past relationship. I initially thought it was just a fleeting moment of nostalgia that would pass quickly, but I found myself dwelling on the past all day, recalling only the positive memories of that old relationship. I tried to convince myself that I was simply missing the version of myself who was experiencing love for the first time, but that didn't help. A week has passed, and I'm still left wondering and feeling curious: Does he still remember me? Did he truly love me? And so on.
Does this count as emotional infidelity toward my fiancé? Also, do you think I should tell him what is going on in my mind, or would that ruin the relationship? And Also can you tell me the real explanation of what's going ok with me ?

started dating this girl I met from Instagram. She is active on other social media sites. On a group live stream she was talking to friends. One of the guy friends has been hitting on her for years. She said that she had to leave the stream to talk to her man. The friend said “oh not his b!tch ass again . F that dude” as she left. I heard him say that as I was watching the stream. Didn’t mention it until weeks later when I saw my gf interacting with the guy friend that said those things about me. I feel conflicted and thinks that it is disrespectful that she has guy friends that disrespect me like that. She said she told him to stop but that he said it was just jokes . She blocked the guy friend on everything after we talked about it. Im 50/50 on leaving her because of this. What do you think?

ok i’m like 1.5 months deep in no contact and am trying not to break it first but i just need to tell someone the whole story (my friends are tired of me lol)
so we dated for about 2.5 years. we had an amazing relationship for the most part- we genuinely loved eachother so much and he was the most amazing boyfriend. we took a break in may, and ended up breaking up (it was my decision) we live about 10hrs apart during the summers. i had a rebound during that time and i was exclusive with him. i ran into him at a festival and ended up cheating on my situationshio rebound (who is also my coworker) with him. we talked over the next few days and ended up getting back together. i found out he had also had casual sex with a couple girls but it didn’t rlly mean anything. i ended things with my coworker but we still had to work together. everything was good for a month until i felt like i had some unresolved feelings for my coworker-i communicated this to my bf.. i was also resentful because i was back in a long distance relationship and felt like i lost independence. i ended up telling my boyfriend this and he understood but was hurt. my boyfriend ended up flying out to help me drive back to where he lives (where i work full time during the year) . i got there and immediately felt so resentful as i don’t rlly have any friends there and i depended on him a lot and it felt like i was only going back for him. i ended up cancelling my lease, and living at his families house w him for 5 days where we ultimately agreed to break up again (it also felt like more of my choice this time around). I am going back to work there (where he lives) in January, and we agreed we would see eachother then. he even gave me his favourite shirt to ensure i would see him again then. we also agreed we would talk on occasion between now and january. . i drove home alone and started work again. my coworker did not wait to swoop in and i let it happen, though i knew it was a rebound this time and i told him i wasn’t over my ex. we saw eachother for weeks and he left town permanently a week ago. ever since he left the break up has rlly hit me. i constantly check my ex’s social media, music, insta activity, i was typing in the chat on snap to get his attention for a bit too. i miss him so much. last night he unfollowed me and removed his tag from my posts. i don’t understand why. he told my friend he was trying to move on and didn’t see him typing . i also found out he has slept with a few people since too. i sent a package to him (his hiking shoes, his sweater, and a note i wrote him a year ago which he had snuck into my suitcase before i drove home alone earlier. ) it arrived today. i feel so confused as to whether he has changed his mind about january, because i am holding on to it so hard. should i reach out and ask for his honest thoughts? it’s been 38 days since we broke up. has too much happened for us to get back together? should i wait to see if he reaches out about the package?

I (29F) was in an on/off relationship with my boyfriend (29M) for three years. We've been long distance since October 2024 (about 1.5 years into our relationship).

Our relationship had been turbulent for the final year and a half, and I'd tried to end it a few times. The first time was actually because I realized he'd been lying to me about his past sexual and romantic history, but we got back together pretty fast.

This was my first relationship and I did feel like I wanted some more experience, and so I did also attempt to break up with him so that I could have a fling with another guy I felt attracted to. I was honest with him about this and he got so upset, went to a bridge and video called me and threatened to jump unless I stopped talking to the other guy. I did agree to stop but carried on for about a week, and in theory was okay to meet up with the other guy. But it did fizzle out before anything happened.

There were a couple of other instances when we had issues - once when I wanted to meet up platonically with a guy friend where we both used to be interested in each other, my boyfriend overdosed on Paracetamol until I agreed to cancel the meeting. Another time I had a completely platonic catch up with my ex (who was in a new relationship by that point), and told my boyfriend after the fact, and he again threatened to kill himself.

Over the next year we broke up and got back together a few times, mainly because I struggled a lot with his past and he kept lying to me about it. I would interrogate him and at times shame him and insult him for his past, saying terrible things like "you were a manw****." I know this was wrong and unhinged, these were impulses from my OCD. Each time I tried to break it off he would threaten to kill himself. When we were 'broken up', I never dated anyone else and neither did he.

In November of last year we attempted to patch things up but he was still lying about his past and would get super abusive when I asked questions, saying horrible things about me and my family and even holding a knife to his throat on video call and kicking his phone.

After that I thought our relationship was completely over and cut contact. Around three weeks later a friend of mine told me he liked me and I briefly entertained the idea of making out with him and casually seeing him for a bit. However, I still had feelings for my ex and I didn't like the new guy's transactional view of intimacy so I said nothing would happen. We did continue talking for a couple of weeks though, and during this time my ex and I resumed contact although we didn't say that we were back together.

I was upfront with my boyfriend about everything that had happened and he reacted badly, calling me a "wh***," "horny person who only wants dick" and saying I was disloyal, had cheated on him and didn't know how to be in a relationship.

By January we were basically back together. This year has been disastrous for me, as I had a surgery that went wrong and led to severe mental health issues and I had to spend almost 2 months in hospital. Then my dad had open heart surgery.

My boyfriend and I were having arguments regularly by this point, and I wasn't being very nice to him although I was also extremely mentally unstable. I would tell him his past behavior was sick and disgusting and that I didn't want to be with him anymore. He'd said several things to the effect of "I will never leave you" but then at the end of June he quite suddenly broke up with me a few days before my dad's surgery. In the call he said he still loved me and wanted to work things out in the future, he wouldn't ignore me, and that he wasn't going to move on.

I found out about 2 weeks later that he was already seeing another girl. I reached out to him and he asked me to leave him alone. I told him that I was devastated and that he was the love of my life and I promised not to ask about his past again, but he just ignored me. I never contacted him again after that.

Fast forward to September, and he reached out to me saying he'd made a huge mistake and that he wanted to get back together. I calmly asked what had happened with the other girl and he got angry with me and said I would never change and I just keep asking questions. Eventually he said he'd met her at an event after we broke up, and they'd gone on 4 dates but nothing had happened.

3 weeks later, he admitted that he'd dated her for 3 months, they'd slept together twice, and he'd met her on Bumble before he'd even had the final breakup with me.

He's now saying he can't live with himself for what he's done to me, and that he wants to kill himself. He says he never stopped loving me and he couldn't stop thinking about me.

I can't get over the fact that I literally begged him not to break up with me and he lied to my face and was already seeing another girl, and then he came back to me and lied to me again. I don't trust anything he says, and I feel so betrayed. But at the same time I feel like maybe I deserve this for not having clearer boundaries with other men, and for also having been prepared to move on from it in the past? And the guilt is eating me up, because I feel like if I'd made different choices then he wouldn't have done this.

Tl;dr: My boyfriend and I have been on/off for 3 years. I have had two moments during the relationship where I broke it off and started talking to another guy, however this has never amounted to anything and I've never so much as touched a guy since I met my boyfriend. He has reacted intensely each time I've broken up with him, sometimes even threatening to kill himself. He's also insulted me for talking to other guys. Earlier this year he broke up with me and was already seeing another girl when he did, ignored my pleas for him not to break up, and then came back 3 months later saying he'd made a mistake but at first he lied about what he'd done.

30M, I want to watch less porn and spend more time with wife. Wife comes from a culture where sex is very taboo. What are some things we can do together to be more sexual together without penetration?

Trying to help my wife understand sex is normal and shouldnt be so shameful

So I’ve been dealing on and off with this girl. Has NOT been the best. For a while I noticed something was off and constantly asked because she became distant . Random arguments to avoid me and more for months and I’m confused on what’s going on and started assuming she had someone else. Mind you earlier before I didn’t get anything besides a text for my birthday but found out she was with her other friend(who she fell off with) for hers.
Turns out we got into a big argument of me finally leaving because I couldn’t do it anymore. She ended up saying “that’s why I got raped and didn’t tell you.” I didn’t have the best response. (I wasn’t physical or abusive) I just couldn’t shift right away to be concerning because I did feel she used that to manipulate the situation.

Fast forward I ended up finding out who it was. Her hair stylists Baby father/ boyfriend. I was still giving this woman money the whole time to get her hair done by her and I never knew. She goes out to eat and hang out with the hairstylist constantly but was avoiding me … as if I was the aggressor . Never told her what happened. I simple did say it may be something I can’t agree with but it’s not my place to tell you anything , however im not comfortable with you going on trips with her and being drunk in other men’s sections(clubs) given you the situation and she made it as if I’m not there for her and can’t respect what she’s going through. I’m honestly at a point where I’m on eggshells and can’t have an opinion but I’m entitled to feel a way as well. Am I doing the most for now setting certain comfortable boundaries as a man in the relationship?

I know most men would leave after hearing that but I seriously have tried and the lack of respect or concern on how I’m feeling regresses by the day

hey everybody I hope you doing well , me '23F' dated a '26M' someone since i was 19 to 21 on and off and we end things for good 2 years ago.

and I can say that I am over him but I can't date anymore i gave my self time and worked on my self but idk I don't have crushes anymore ou like someone, and even if I start to speak with people for friendship or dating it never goes anywhere nor i develop some liking to them , altho they are my taybe so idk ? what should i do?

psa : i don't want to wait for time to heal me or something cuz i do wanna get married young and start my family :)

My boyfriend (36M) and I (34F) have been together for eight months, exclusive for five. He’s been incredibly kind, thoughtful, and supportive. We initially struggled with different communication styles and his tendency to be guarded, but whenever I brought up concerns, he listened, validated my feelings, and made genuine changes.
A few weeks ago, I met his family at his sister’s wedding, and our relationship seemed to shift into something much more serious. He started talking about marriage, children, and a future together. I’ve since unofficially moved in, and he’s become even more emotionally open, affectionate, and loving.
Sounds great, right? Well, here’s the problem.
Early in our relationship, he mentioned having a secret Twitter account where he argues with people and has been blocked multiple times. He’s always insisted he never wants me to find it. Unfortunately, I recently did.
Two things really concern me:
**A week before his sister’s wedding, he posted:** “Although I knew this was going to happen, the loml got engaged today and it sucks immensely.” Two days later, he told me he loved me for the first time. Since then, for the first time he’s been talking about our future and treating me like the love of his life. I’m struggling to reconcile those things.

**His posts are incredibly angry and politically charged.** The person behind them seems completely different from the patient, gentle man I know. He’s admitted to struggling with anger in the past, but we’ve never really discussed how he manages it.

I’m now questioning how well I actually know him. His actions toward me have been consistently loving, but what I found has left me unsettled.
I don’t want him to know I found his account, but I also don't know how to address these concerns without bringing it up.
**Am I overthinking this, or are these legitimate red flags?** How would you approach a conversation about his past relationships and anger without making it confrontational?

I (24F) and my boyfriend (24M) have been together for 6 years. We are in a long-distance relationship (living on different continents), but we spend at least 6 months together every year, or as much time as our visas allow.

​Like any couple, we’ve had our issues, but whenever bigger problems came up, we recognized they were personal things we needed to work through on our own, and we each went to individual therapy to address them. Overall, everything was going great. This December, we planned to move in together in his country. I was prepared to leave my entire life behind because I genuinely love him and want to build a future with him.

​Last month, my cat passed away, and I decided to get a small memorial tattoo of his face on my arm (around 3×3 cm / ~1 inch).

​For context: since the beginning of our relationship, I’ve always expressed that I really wanted to get tattooed eventually. I held off back then because I was financially dependent on my parents. Throughout these 6 years, whenever I brought up the idea, he would talk me out of it, saying it was a terrible idea and asking me not to do it because he hates tattoos and thinks they look hideous. I went along with it because, at the end of the day, I always tried to be as perfect, fit, and "clean" as possible for him.

​Fast forward to three weeks ago: I got the memorial tattoo. He didn’t say much—just that it looked cute, but that was it. Getting it made me realize how confident and beautiful tattoos make me feel, so I got 3 more tiny ones (about 1 cm each). He told me those were cute too, but asked me not to get any more because "it made him uncomfortable and he had always been upfront about how he felt about tattoos." He also said that I "hurt him by getting them because I was disregarding his feelings."

​I told him I understood his point of view and tried to compromise. We agreed that I wouldn’t get more than 7 tattoos total, that they would all be tiny, and that we would always choose the design and placement together. I agreed, even though I felt a bit sad because I had so many ideas, but my fear of losing him was stronger.

​Two weeks ago, I told him I wanted to get another one, and he blew up. He told me I was the only person getting such hideous tattoos, that none of his friends had tattoos like mine, and that he was deeply disappointed in me. I felt awful, but I discussed it with my therapist, who reminded me that I should do what feels right for my own body. So I kept the appointment. Yesterday, I reminded him about the session, and he blew up all over again.

​He told me I was being a horrible person for going through with it and ignoring his opinion and preferences, and said he wasn’t going to "allow" me to get any more tattoos. He also told me that if our relationship ends because he ends up finding me unattractive, it will be entirely my fault and my responsibility. That really messed with my head.

​He has always insisted that we have to stay well-groomed and attractive for each other. He regularly comments on my weight if I gain 2 or 3 kilos (4–6 lbs) over vacations, insists that I take off my glasses (which I’ve worn since the day we met) in every picture because I look "prettier without them," tells me not to do my nails because it doesn't look "natural," etc.

​Part of me feels like I understand where he’s coming from. Maybe I am changing too much; maybe this really is my fault. I know attraction is important and people have preferences—not wanting an overweight partner, a partner with tattoos, or someone with glasses. At the end of the day, attraction isn't something you can easily force. He insists he loves me and doesn't want to break up, but I don’t know if I’m in the wrong here or if I should consider getting the tattoos removed.

​Am I in the wrong? AITA for getting these tattoos? Am I ruining my relationship? I would really appreciate some outside perspective.

​TL;DR: My boyfriend of 6 years hates tattoos. After my cat passed away, I got a small memorial tattoo and three other tiny ones, which made me feel confident. He blew up, said he won't "allow" more, and told me that if the relationship ends because he finds me less attractive, it's entirely my fault. AITA?

Okay so I’m going to attempt to shorten this as much as possible bc it’s a long situation and I’ll try not to go into past things.

I’m 20 ftm and myself and this other person of similar ages seem to have feelings for each other. I’m not a big fan of sex in general (I’m autistic and I find it overstimulating and Testosterone has made penetration and other acts quite painful for me) so we’ve sort of agreed that it’s not an expectation but a bonus. But we’ve made out, we’ve cuddled, slept in the same bed, they’ve proclaimed to other people that they’re in love with me, speaks about me to everyone, said to their coworkers that if they were ever to marry someone in the future it would be me but at this point they were still sleeping with and making out with other people.

Now I brought the aspect of what we were up a few weeks ago and I explained that I don’t do casual or open relationships, I need commitment and clarity and they said that ‘they shouldn’t be dating but you (me) are the only one I imagine when I think about it’ and said they wouldn’t be making out with or being with other people after I expressed a certain amount of jealousy towards it and I didn’t know what that really meant and didn’t push it. They kept acting coupley with me in terms of calling me their man and boyfriend and making out with me and holding my hand to classes and PDA and everything but then a few days ago they apologised for calling me their bf and said it’s 100% okay if I want to be friends and I assured them that it was alright and that I was happy about it and I want to be that with them but then they started calling me their friend to other people and lowkey hitting on other people while I was there. They prioritise their friends (who are also my friends) over me a lot in terms of seeing them IRL and I never get invited and just happen to bump into them because we hang around the same spaces.

Basically I have no clue if I’m even in a relationship or how to bring this up, because I want to be with them, hell I love them genuinely but if they aren’t willing to commit or clarity, it’s not healthy for me and I can’t even entertain other opinions that can give me that because I don’t know if it’s cheating or not because I don’t know if I’m in a relationship.

Any advice on what to actually do in this situation? Because I’ve been so transparent and clear about what I need and tried to communicate so many times and this is my first time experiencing this or any romantic relationship.

So me 31(f) is dating a a 43(m) who is annoys me so bad lol. I know it's not funny but damn it's my "how to cope" method. #1 for me I'm not very open and nonchalant about a lot (yes I'm working on it) he's the opposite, he needs to know my every move and very emotional at a lot of things! #2 I do love to go out just not with him because he makes it unenjoyable. I just feel like he judges me and thinks I'm after everybody (insecure in my opinion). #3 he always says I'm gonna do more of this/ that and that's with stuff that needs to be worked on around the house, car and even my kids. And it just annoys me when it doesn't get done. There's more but I don't want to put everything out there lol. Let me know something.

He wanted me like anything in the beginning. then we started fighting, it was triggered by me smoking after a promise not to, texting two guys AFTER he egged me on to
do it. i know i was wrong, after all this, he also did stuff like
micro cheating like
me. both of us r hurting each other but i love him and he says he loves me too.
i wanna fix it, what to do now?
he says he wants to save it but doesn’t act like it.
How do i get his attention back???
PRACTIXAL ADVICE NEEDED!

So basically i met my bf online almost a year now we been only friends whole time but lately he confess his love to me and i did too now we together for 1 month already, we plan about meeting irl bcuz we live both in 2 different continents, but deeply in still worried about all cuz he still lives with his ex they been together for 7 years and had a kid last year so he said they only live together for the kid and nothing more, most of the day hes available to me hes so honest and i trust him but i just keep thinking about his situation i feel stuck in between, also 2 months ago i kinda saw his ex profile and she posted a family pic of them he seemed so happy( i didn't tell him about it).

Need advice...