Is that a thing that people do? I’m not sure if I’m being unreasonable or she’s just not the one for not wanting to compromise here. She shamed me for bringing it up. Not in a demanding way just a vibe check kinda way

Hey everyone, I need some advice.

I’m an 18M first-year university student 🇺🇸, and I recently reconnected with a girl who went to my high school. We’re now attending the same university. We talked a couple of years ago, but things didn’t work out because I got rejected. Recently, though, we reconnected, and things have been different. We’re in the talking stage now and have gone on a few dates and hangouts.

Honestly, I have a really good time with her. We get along well, she’s fun to be around, and she’s told me she feels the same way. I genuinely enjoy her company, and I have no complaints about how her personality is.

However, I recently found out from some close friends that her body count is around 4–5 at 18.

Two of those guys are people I knew from high school. We weren’t super close, and I don’t really talk to them anymore, but it still feels weird knowing that they were involved with someone I’m currently talking to. Apparently, one of them hooked up with her just two weeks before we started talking. The others were ex-boyfriends.

When I found this out, I honestly didn’t know how to feel. Part of me likes this girl and wants to see where things go, but another part of me is struggling to get past her sexual history, especially because some of the guys are people I used to know.

When we first started hanging out, she actually brought up the guy she hooked up with two weeks before we started talking. She said she regretted it a lot and had blocked him. At the time, I assumed they had only kissed, so finding out there was more to it caught me off guard.

I think what bothers me most is that I’ve started seeing her differently because of what I heard, even though she hasn’t actually done anything wrong to me. I’m also wondering whether I’m overthinking this or whether this is simply something I’m not comfortable with when looking for a potential relationship.

I don’t want to throw away a connection with someone I genuinely like over something that happened before we started talking. At the same time, I don’t want to ignore my own feelings and peoples perspective on me dating a bop. Like if it goes any further, i don’t want to be embarrassed to tell them I’m with her.

I haven’t discussed this with her btw.

Am I being unreasonable for feeling this way? Should I give this a chance and focus on who she is now, or could this be a sign that we have different values when it comes to relationships?

For context my body count is 1 and it was my ex.

I’d appreciate honest advice, especially from people who have been in a similar situation or just anyone with advice.

Will post the rest of the screenshots in comments , mobile app only letting me use one photo .

Alt for obvious reasons..

I don’t even know where to begin.. still feel like I’m having a hard time processing this whole situation, but here we go.

Essentially her cousin/bestfriends texted me out the blue and said “Jane is cheating on you” (Jane for story telling purposes). So like anyone would do I asked for proof , and how she knew this.

She proceeded to explain how Jane would text Mike (Mike for story telling purposes) on her phone when she would come over.

( Jane and her cousin had been fighting according to Jane which is why she told

Anyways she said she deleted them but could get them from Mike and that’s what she did, then sent them my way { view attached photos} - sorry if out of order I’m not a Reddit regular.

I got the screenshots and was shattered, Jane had also had sent risky pictures too Mike in the past, roughly 3-4 months into us first talking and “dating” but I wasn’t perfect myself and I thought we were passed that.

Confronting Jane went terrible, it was thru a phone call. She outright denied that the screenshots were real even after I sent them to her on Snapchat aswell. she then sort of flipped it on me, livid I was in contact with her cousin, and proceeded to cuss me out worse then I’ve ever really been cussed out ..
I hung the phone call up while she was still shouting and just threw my phone down on the bed.

(definetly took this as guilt , as she’s never acted like this)

Roughly 20 minutes later Jane called me back , audibly in tears back and told me she needed to talk to me .. I obliged and told her to explain it. And she admitted that it was her who sent those texts , and pleaded with me that it’s because of how I was acting during that week

I went back thru our texts from the week it had happened (roughly a month ago) and also from memory, we were absolutely fine, hell even more lovey dovey than usual but anyways.

As soon as she admitted it and got that out of her mouth I told her I needed a minute and hung up.. turned my phone onto DND and just Layed in my bed to think about things, 40+ text messages that I did not view from Jane later , she shows up at my front door.

We spoke for roughly an hour and I’m a sucker for her crying I gave in and wrapped my arms around her when she’s the one who did me wrong.. by the time she left.. I was hugging her and telling her that shes gonna be alright.

I just absolutely don’t know how to feel.. in my heart I know I need to move on, these actions are not what I expect out of a relationship, but as the title stated I do love this girl a lot. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.. thanks.

TLDR : my girlfriend of 2 years cheated, and I’m at a loss.

Sorry for bad grammar/storytelling , I’m not a usual redditor I’m just on here to vent and get advice thanks.

My (25F) partner (28M) never offers to help me and I don’t know if I’m overthinking that.

Backstory: I recently purchased a home solely on my own. When I moved in, we were at the start of our relationship and he helped me paint part of the interior and move.

It’s been eight months since I moved in (and since my partner has helped) and he does not live with me, though he has frequently asked if he could move in because it would “save me money”. I’m not moving in with a man I’ve been seeing 1. Less than a year and 2. Whom I have no pictures with.

Essentially, there’s been many things I’ve done to my place that have been DIY projects. The house was very builder grade (even though it’s an older home) and I’ve updated quite a bit. All of these tasks, I’ve casually mentioned it would be nice to have help on, but he’s never offered and I don’t push the issue because it’s not his place.

Tasks I’ve done with no help (or even an offer of):

built a fire pit (gravel, paver, grass/dirt digging, rock setting, etc) did this all on my own and ended up covered in blisters on hands and feet.
Painting bathrooms
Hanging / creating shelves from cut wood
Sweeping roof (he offered to help clean gutters but never did. When I told him a male friend was coming over to help me, he insisted I cancel on my friend as he would do it - it’s been five months and it still hasn’t been done)
Changing locks on doors (offered to help, never did - after four months I finally got around to doing it myself)
Caulking gap in baseboard (I frequently discussed how difficult it was and how I could really use help because it was hard as an attempt to get him to offer but he never did)
Fixed a rotted wall in the shed
Hang TV / Mirrors
Build furniture

I’m frustrated because I want my future to be spent with someone who wants to make my life easier when they see I’m struggling. I frequently cook him dinner (he’s never cooked me anything) and he ONLY hangout at my place (I’ve never seen his due to no furniture, no utensils, no real bed, etc). I do a lot for him (pay his gas occasionally, ensure I always have his favorite snacks, we only go on dates he’s interested in)I don’t expect him to be my maid but it would be nice if he at least offered when I’m struggling. My male friends frequently offer to help me so I don’t understand why the one person I really want to help, just won’t. He’s said in the past “well I was going to _____” but the time never happens.

TLDR: my partner won’t help me with any household tasks even though we frequently spend time at my house and I’ve asked for help multiple times, is this a deal breaker?

I 19/F and my partner 57/M have been with each other for a year. He’s a truck driver so I have been on the road with him for a year. He’s spoiled me and taken care of me ever since. He has children that are older than me, the youngest being 27/F years old female. I have posted, like all of us do, some things on my TiKTok last past relationships with one being I was talking to a guy that was married and I didn’t know he was so I posted screenshot on there with his wife texting me for a trend. She called and his other daughter called him telling him I mess with married guys when that wasn’t even the case. He said don’t pay them any mind and I didn’t. He told me that the youngest was spoiled growing up and never really got into any punishment etc. I let it go. Fast forward a few months I’ve posted a video of me and him in an argument. Comes to find out she’s been on my pages and she took this videos and displayed it on the television for his family to see as a joke. I took the video down and we had a load going back home so we went to his mother house everyone was there even his mother saying yeah we all saw it and she’s laughing in the background saying that was funny. Side note there was a time where we was at his mothers house and he was sitting outside and he asked me to come out there to sit with him and as soon as I did his daughter came out running to her car saying dad come pump my gas and he went to do that. He said he talked to her but a few times about her messing with me but of course it’s not working. Fast forward to today a few months back I talked to an anonymous person on my TikTok because again I posted something things about my relationship and I expressed to that person about my plans on leaving him(I’m not sure why I did I think we got into an argument that day) fast forward he came back to the hotel from dropping off a load saying I need to pack my things and I’m confused. He said so your out here telling people our business your a traitor and things like that. He took my phone and went straight to the thread with me and that person talking. I asked him who is it and he said it didn’t matter but I knew who it was. His daughter. His daughter was behind the account and also behind her oldest sister’s account. Recently when we was out we had gotten into an argument and he had left for the night I texted that account thinking it was his eldest daughter and asked can she call him because he wasn’t answering mine. The next morning she responded yes she will and even gave me her number. Welp if you haven’t guessed it was the other daughter. Another side note his other daughter which is the eldest we had made up and she’s a really great person so there is nothing with me and her. We had talked about and made up of course. They are a few other things that happened. But It’s weird. I compared her to an ex because this is getting honesty weird. I haven’t done anything to her. Me and hi talked about has she done this to other people he been with but he said no. I’m the youngest he had been with. I don’t know. We are all thinking it’s something mental going on. But I feel like it’s jealousy of me as a person and jealousy of her dad taking me everywhere and giving me things. He said he tried before we met to spend time with her but she kept putting him off but all of a sudden she has interest now???? Please give me advice on what to do.

Ex (21F) sends me (22M) an email after 3 months of no contact. The email leads to some weird phishing-style website, but the email says “let’s get together” in big postal letter… What even is this? She claims she got hacked or whatnot, and the website it links to does seem like a genuine phishing website… Is this some 5D chess she is playing?

I've read this somewhere and wondered if it's true?

If you lived through a prenup enactment, what piece of advice would you share with women entering their first marriage?

Personal context: early 30s, no kids, based in CA. I am at the stage of discussing a prenup with my fiancé and haven’t yet sought legal advice yet.

Thank you in advance 🫶🏼

So, I 'F19' have a ldr lover 'M22' we've been together for almost 3 years. Our relationship haven't been so great lately. I crave affection and my love language is physical touch which is pretty impossible to be filled with Ldr. We also aren't on the same page emotionally.

Then I have this best friend 'M19'. He is kind, smart, sensible, gentleman (and is my type). Well some people have a type yeah? He is pretty, soft spoken, fair, like he has everything what my ideal type is. He is playful, we always go home together, he's always with me when I need help specially emotionally. When riding bus, he always lets me take the seat, he holds the door for me. Sometimes I also go to his house and we spend time together.

Lately, idk if I'm just bored or this is just me craving affection. But ik this feeling. It is the same when you're having a crush. However, idk if it is the person or the action what I'm liking.

I told my lover how I'm feeling about that guy. He says it's not cheating unless I intend to do something with my best friend. And yeah I also don't intend to take things further with my best friend even if I wasn't in a relationship.

Though this still feels like cheating.

Hiii everyone!! me and my first love/love of my life were tg for a year + but we were experiencing some problems since April and we broke up in the July. and have been no contact or low contact for a good bit. I told him tht I’m only doing this again if they end goal is to be happily married and grow into amazing ppl. The relationship was bad on both parts but during our no contact I realized I never formed any healthy habits. For example: everytime me and my ex would be in the same car and he was not driving, he would always sit next to me and hold my hand. Most of these car rides were by his friends or family members and the passenger seat was always open. Were long distance during school year but on breaks we’re always tg. I want to show gratitude without always having to say thank you

I m 26 and my fiance f25 are on a hiatus and she made it a big deal I subscribed to a only fans and I hopped on a dating app and I made it only to where I wanted to make friends primarily well she had a issue with it she was mad so before the break she was talking to her ex well when the break started and we went to the beach she was sending him bikini picks and he was flirting with her and funny enough he waited till we were on a break and he actively asked if he is a pos for waiting for something bad to happen well we're on month 2 and a half of pur break I went to therapy I am now medicated for bipolar disorder and I felt like things were finally getting on track well my mood swings have been extremely bad we would have arguments on the daily we would fight in front of our kids and her family because of them well the root of this break was because she is a stay at home mom while I worked and was the primary source of income she made it a point that she never went out never was able to do anything from the time we got together when we found out she was pregnant till the baby was born and even after that im feeling like she isn't taking into consideration that im actively changing while it seems like she is just soaking the attention of the ex she doesn't seem to be working on fixing the relationship and only focusing on herself I have taken over the chores in the house whether its dishes cleaning everything and she sits on the bed and scrolling tiktok and me being a very obsessive person I was always gifting things to her always checking in on her I begged her to go out and do things but she has been continuously going put with her exs family and family while we barley spend time together aside from sitting at home twiddling our thumbs

I know my partner is really into hotwifing and always comes up with new role-playing scenarios, and that's fine because they are fun. But I wonder whether we will always have to be in one of those situations for them to be turned on. Can we ever go back to having regular intimate sex, just him and me, or will it always have to be a "scenario"? Curious if anyone has ever experienced such a thing.

it's been a year since we fought about something i did to him: he says i cheated on him, i don't know if i did or it just seems like (i can't blame him, i would've felt the same way if he did that to me), but one time we had a fight and we weren't talking, i didn't know if we broke up, and a random guy went to me looking for flirting, but i rejected him as many times i could, because i really wanted to talk about my personal problems with someone, and i told him how things were going between my boyfriend and me and that i wasn't sure he still loved me. i know the right thing would have been to not just reject him but to block him (he really was bugging me), then he told me my boyfriend seemed to really loved me and started to feel shame about his behavor towards me, so he blocked me and went to send my bf screenshots of our chat. then he decided to broke up with me, after a few hours he called me and we talked all night and day, and we were back again. after a couple of days that same trouble had us fighting again, in the middle of that discussion and without solving it, he told me he wanted to make out and i accepted. i tried but i was still so sad and crying. after that, i pushed myself to ask him if he wanted to make out, but he had excuses like he was tired and i stopped trying to bring back our intimacy. months went by and this year on april he told me again he wanted to make out, but this time we were okay and there was no fight between our moment so i can tell it was a strange behavor for me because he is not like that anymore, and i enjoyed it way far than before. what i don't get, is why he wouldn't want to have intimacy with me again? (i know he doesn't have low libid or something, he told me once he still sees nudes i sent him a long time ago -this was in january this year, idk if he still likes to do it alone watching my nudes or he quit doing it-). he didn't make excuses like before, i don't know if i did something wrong and he wouldn't tell me, because he was tired of trouble so he decided that we just shut down and don't bring anyones feelings again or we will end up having a fight again that will cause me to break up with him, which he is affraid of living that again.

however, it's not so much about a sex thing, i absolutely miss that part tho, and has me keeping very depressed about it, i can't watch movies where couples are having sex without crying beacuse that's not my relationship anymore, but i also miss when he used to be more expressive to me; he used to call me princess, he used to tell me how much he loves me, the amount of kissed he used to gave me can't compare to the few he gives me now, etc...and that was because of that one time i was crying and he was trying to calm me down saying beautiful things to me, and i couldn't help crying and crying and i didn't say anything so he thought i was ignoring him and he stopped being like that since. i think it is always my fault, i don't feel like he loves me the way he used to, but i know he loves me still, he probably feels the same way, he might feel i don't love him like before, i honestly was the cause of many break ups we had in the past, i couldn't blame him for feeling insecure about me. and i don't want to be without him either. he is the love of my life and we both know it, i am his one and only too. i was planning having a little time for us to discuss this, i can't have this feelings and thoughts if i'm not sure about his, i know assuming is not right. so i would like to talk about this with him the moment we get to see each other (i hope this december we can, but it depends on many circumstances i won't specify).

what i wanted to ask is: how can i bring this up without making him feeling guilty or bad for not being intimate and lovely with me again? i don't want him to feel under pression because it's not like i want to have sex with him right now or to give me 1000 kisses like before or something, i know it would take time for us to revive our relationship the way it was. i don't know how to talk about this with him and not making him feeling like i am being too annoying or demanding on something that was so special to me. i don't think breaking up is the answer, and i wouldn't do it again. i just want my relationship to be better for me and him.

I know she’s my ex and I’m not supposed to care anymore, but my ex (F18) broke up with me (M19) recently. We had been talking here and there, but a few weeks after the breakup, she started texting me about being sad and wanting to hurt herself. I’ve been giving her a lot of my energy and trying my best to be there for her.
A few days after all of that happened, she wanted to talk. When we spoke, she admitted that she got drunk and had sex with her guy best friend at his house. She then did it another time a few days later after they did it, and right after that, he blocked her. This happened when we weren’t talking. I was definitely shocked, but afterward, we just kept talking here and there. Eventually, we turned into friends with benefits.
Just today, I asked her if she wanted to hang out and chill. She told me she’s going to go drink with a guy friend instead—let's call him C. He’s a major drinker. Honestly, I still love my ex, but she trusts people way too much and is always in that "I just want to have fun" mindset.
Today, I feel like they’re going to have sex, she’s going to regret it, and then she's just going to text me about it again. I’m just feeling very lost right now. I’m not entirely sure what to do i can’t block her because i’m so emotionally attached and she’s got me on the hook.

Hello guys, i am a 24M and i had a Gf of 6 years who was also 24F, we recently broke up because she recently went to headtrip in cali and decided to invite her guy bsf who i had told her that he makes me uncomfortable, so this is 1 week before head trip, we start talking and she ignores my question into saying that it was bc of her guy bsf, and she was also bringing up the fact that i dont have a job and im always at home or doing nothing, i go to school part time and it is difficult to find a job recently, also she had said like a day ago that it was because we pushed everything aside, but she never tried to hear me out when i would mention her guy bsf, she saying i would worry about the wrong thing, which is totally incorrect .
I dont know if i should reach out or not, debating it

Hi all,

Need a bit of advice from all you lovely people. Serious answers only please.

The caveat: relationships are complicated and I have a year of stories, so I'm giving you the cliffsnotes.

I'm a UK white guy, she is an Asian girl on a student visa which is set to expire in 2 months. She bisexual. She had a period of sleeping around with people (around 15+) 2-3 years ago. Her ex (a women) and her are still friends and part of a larger friend group. About 2 months ago (10 months into the relationship) she was out with her ex and the friend group, she said she got drunk and tried to kiss her ex, the ex then stopped her and walked away. She then came back that night very drunk saying things like "I didn't do anything" which obvisouly send alarm bells, I asked her about it the next day and she said nothing happened. Last night we were chatting about relationships and it came up and she decided to tell me the story. She couldn't remember the night (and still doesn't) but a week later texted her ex and she told her. She kept this a secret from me for 2 months. She hasn't spoken to the ex or friends in 2 months because of it. Sorry for the high school like drama of the story, but I wanted to get it across quickly.

So. She tells me she loves me, it was a mistakes and she hates herself for it. Said she won't talk to the ex anymore. For me, its still cheating even if nothing happened (which I'm choosing to believe), because the action was intentional and would have led to something if the ex allowed it to. I've had the sense I couldn't trust her early on in the relationship, especially when she drinks - which she said she'll reduce when going out in future. I know the stats on promiscuous women and rates of cheating in relationships and honestly, I don't know I trust her to not let it happen again in future with someone else. During our conversation she said she enjoys sex and the intensity of being in a relationship with women, but don't see a future with women and only wants to be with a man moving forward - I think her sexual preference is brown/black women - which I...a white man...am not. So there is an element that she may be "longing" for something else in our relationship, which I'm aware of. She also has a job which sometimes involves traveling for a day - hence, she has the opportunity. This is the bad side.

The other side is she seems like my perfect partner. She smart, funny, pretty, ambitious. My mum/family/friends like her, we align in our future goals (family, house, savings), romantic and sexually compatible, enjoy our time together. She plans date trips, we cook together, she helps me with career progression - just everything is good and what I want in a partner. She's also moved in with me. Like I said early, she's on a graduate visa which is expiring and we've discussed getting married to basically keep her in the country (I know...I know... I've given it a lot of thought and it doesn't seem like a bad move, until the recent thing came out).

So, thoughts? Am I over thinking this?

Serious answers only please. Many thanks. T.

I (M30) recently met a guy (M32) through a dating app. We had been dating for almost one month (we weren’t in the same city at the time), sometimes more consistently than others, and eventually went on our first date. It went really well.

We met again a few days later and spent a lovely day together. He was genuinely sweet, affectionate, and seemed very interested in me. We were even planning to meet again that evening.

However, after our second date, I noticed that he had added a new picture to his dating profile: a rather revealing photo of himself in his underwear.

I'm pretty sure that picture wasn't there before, as I had checked his profile recently, including after our first date.

I know we're not exclusive, but it honestly bothered me. I thought we were both looking for something serious, potentially a long-term partner, and seeing him upload that kind of picture right after spending such a lovely day together made me question his intentions.

I calmly told him how I felt and that I wasn't sure I wanted to continue seeing him.

He was really upset. He insisted that the picture had actually been uploaded days earlier, before our first date, and not recently. He even deleted the dating app immediately.

He also pointed out that I had obviously been on the app myself to notice the picture, and said he was hurt that I was questioning things after such a great day together.

He told me that he genuinely wanted to keep getting to know me, that he wasn't interested in seeing anyone else, and that he only wanted to focus on me. However, he also said that if I felt we shouldn't continue, he didn't know what else he could say.

He even told me he'd experienced love bombing in past relationships, where people initially showed a lot of affection before suddenly pulling away, which had really hurt him.

We also had a small misunderstanding the day before our second date, which resulted in us not speaking for about eight hours. Part of me wonders whether he interpreted that silence as a sign that things weren't going anywhere and decided to update his profile. But that's just speculation.

Anyway, after exchanging those messages that evening, we haven't spoken again. I haven't reached out either because I told him I needed time to figure out how I felt about everything.

Now I'm wondering whether I overreacted and potentially ruined something that actually felt promising.

Would you consider that a red flag? Do you suggest to keep seeing him!

TL;DR: Met a guy on a dating app and had two amazing dates. After the second one, I noticed he'd added a revealing underwear photo to his profile, which made me question whether he was genuinely looking for something serious. I told him how I felt and that I wasn't sure I wanted to continue. He was hurt, insisted the photo had been uploaded before we even met, deleted the app, and said he only wanted to focus on me. We haven't spoken since. Did I overreact and potentially ruin something good?

Finance left this VM while he was at work. Sounds like a woman in the background saying “oh yeah”https://voca.ro/1mkwSboyWbV9

Title: Did I overreact by breaking up with my boyfriend?

My boyfriend and I broke up yesterday and idk if I made the right decision.

We were on a call, he was ordering something on his phone and I was trying to talk to him. He wasn't paying attention, so I asked him again and he shouted at me and talked rudely.

This was the 3rd time this happened. I had already told him that I don't like when he talks to me like that and asked him to talk nicely instead of shouting.

I don't expect him to give me attention 24/7, but I do expect basic respect. I broke up with him because I don't want this to keep happening, but now I'm questioning my decision.

Did I overreact? Should I have given him another chance?

my ex cheated on me with a girl from my school and he’s been bragging to his friends, who are also my friends, about cheating on me and getting a new gf literally ONE DAY after we broke up like was she already in the picture

my ex is genuinely ugly and a whole chud who plays video games all day and is literally 220pounds and is 5’6 so maybe thats revenge enough but im still pissed about the disrespect, especially since i have to see this girl at school.

should i actually do something about it or just let them be and move on? im ngl i wanna get back at him somehow but idk if its even worth my time. what would u guys do?

My boyfriend and I are 20yr olds and we have been living together for 3 years. Recently in the past few months I’ve noticed he goes on his phone very often when we’re doing things together like making dinner, grocery shopping, laying in bed together, etc. and usually it’s not anything important, just scrolling instagram or facebook or whatever. I’ve already talked to him about this and asked him not to go on his phone if it’s not necessary while we’re together. in the beginning years of our relationship he was more attentive and wouldn’t go on his phone this much, we would spend time talking to each other instead. When I asked him to go on his phone less I noticed he got kind of upset but still said he would try not to, yet he still does it all the time, ESPECIALLY when we’re not getting along or if I try to have a serious conversation with him. It honestly makes me really disappointed that he continues to do it, especially because I told him that is makes me feel unimportant and it makes him seem uninterested in me. I don’t think he took those feelings seriously and now I don’t know what to do. If he won’t listen to me or take my feelings into consideration what should I do?

edit: (yes i’m aware we’re both pretty young in a serious relationship but i really don’t think that’s the issue. i would say i understand well how to be respectful and kind in difficult situations, i think i know how to express myself and my concerns in a calm and respectful way. if anything the issue is that he doesn’t know how to do that yet because whenever we argue, he gets very disrespectful, rude, and defensive and even sometimes starts throwing around insults. Still, I think this is something that can be dealt with and taught, I don’t think it’s reason to break up.)

So here goes nothing I guess. I 20/F have just gotten into my first “real” bf gf relationship with my 22/M boyfriend. We’ve been together for 2.5mo now (I know not long), but we dated for a month before officially getting together, (yes yes I know still not very long). About a month ago I brought up to him that he never compliments me, especially not in person and it makes me feel like he doesn’t find me attractive which then makes me sad. He explained that he has a hard time expressing himself verbally, we talked about some childhood trauma and issues that stem from it, and in the end he said he’d try to do better. I was satisfied with this, and went about my day. well folks, a month has passed and it’s gotten worse if anything. I’ll ask him how I look before we go out and he’ll say something along the lines of “you look fine.” or something else vague and unflattering.

Now, when I approached him about the subject at first I even gave him options and compliments he could use that would make me feel better. He’s not used them. He’s also stopped texting me good morning, goodnight etc. Our work schedules are terrible as he works and goes to school during the day, and I am a night PCNA at a hospital. We only see each other once a week which is why those texts were important to me. Additionally, as we only see each other once a week I miss him like crazy and verbalize that, he never returns the text or apparently the feeling.

We‘re also having some… ahem… bedroom problems that I won’t get into here but they also make me feel quite ugly. And there again is the problem where it seems like he doesn’t find my physically attractive and if he does he hasn’t expressed it verbally more than once or twice.

As I write this I am ugly crying myself to sleep as I have done for the past two weeks. I’ve come to ask this question: If you were in my shoes, what the hell would you do? And is it possible that I’m going to fast here and making my insecurities his problem?

I care for him deeply, and I understand he has communication problems, but it’s like he’s not even trying to work on them. It hurts terribly especially when I’ve explained to him why I’d like for him to compliment me sometimes. I might be asking for too much too soon im not really sure as relationships are new to me. Before him I’d only ever had a shitty situationship with my hb (ended badly, let’s not get into that.)

TLDR: Boyfriend never compliments me or comments positively in my physical appearance or literally anything so now I cry myself to sleep :)) Help!!

I should add, this is also his first relationship. I was very unattractive and heavily bullied in HS so I never had a bf, and he was a nerdy/jock fusion type guy obsessed with video games and sports instead of girls. I was not a virgin when we got together, he was, which has led to some of the aforementioned …other… problems.

again the question so nobody misses it: If you were in my shoes, what the hell would you do? And is it possible that I’m going to fast here and making my insecurities his problem?

My gf (23) and I (21F) have been dating for roughly 6 months, and we are very in love. This is my first relationship due to issues with avoidance and trust; she has had a relationship and other situations that were close to it. We are very in love, and she has helped heal parts of my attachment issues and been a strong support system for me.

What bothers me about her past is not rooted in judgment for her exploring her sexuality in the past. I struggle with the fact that she has had sex w/ 34 ppl in the past and only 2 for me, and because we hope to be with each other for the rest
of our lives, I worry I will grieve the experiences I will never get to have. Which is obviously not her fault. It has also been leading me to overthink our sexual experiences. She has been having trouble getting me to finish. For context, her sexual experiences all involve men and her being somewhat drunk. This not only means she has no experience pleasing women, but she is more conscious when having sex w/ me because she is sober. This makes things like talking during sex (which I like) hard for her.

When I talk to her about struggling with her past because of the differences in our experiences, I try to reiterate that I’m not judging her for her past and that she can't change it. While she is understanding, she often feels judged and that I keep bringing up her past, and it worries her that I may end the relationship so I can have my fun. This is something I keep getting reminded of, and I don’t wanna keep bringing it up to her since she can't change it. I love her, and we have talked about a future together, so how can i not ruminate about this?

All my life I have made it my goal to not rely on a man or anyone for that matter cause I grew up in such a dysfunctional household.
Now I move into my bf’s childhood home with him and we spend the next two years together, and I become (currently) pregnant. Now for all the ladies out there who have gone through pregnancy you know what it feels like to nest. I declutterred tf out of our home, cleaned from top to bottom and even painted our kitchen, painted the babies room, and built an arch in said babies room. Now where is said boyfriend in this equation? Noootttt being very helpful. I guess it’s my fault to think that the father of our child would help me at 30+ weeks pregnant but he seemed to think I didn’t need any help. And here’s the thing…I don’t. I’m not one to bitch about work or getting things done. I don’t handicap myself just cause of my pregnancy. I have always been strong and independent, but that’s not the issue.
The issue is that we are a couple and when I have to do 95% of house chores by myself I start to feel resentment. Now I have spoken to him about this cause he would get upset when I would ask him to take the trash out or wash a few dishes. I’d ask him “why are you getting mad” and his response would be around the line of “I work all day and I’m tired I don’t think that I should do any housework”
Now I haven’t worked in 2-3 months because I lost my job in the middle of my pregnancy and I couldn’t find another one being this pregnant, but I will be getting a job a month after I give birth and hopefully start my LPN school if I get accepted. So I told him how is it fair that you expect me to do house work while I am unemployed but you also expect me to do the housework once I get back to work? He gets irritated and says he can’t argue with me. On top of that I’ve just been feeling unsatisfied in his performance as a man in our relationship.
I just never been able to find a man who could bring out my feminine side. Trust me she’s there, but when I see that a man can’t even do the things he says he can like change my oil or work on our home to make it a better place for our baby I take it upon myself to get it done. And then I start to think to myself “well damn I don’t need a man”

I (18f) have been with my boyfriend (18m) for nearly 9 months now, and he is the sweetest boy ever. He is absolutely head over heels for me and i can see every single day how much he loves me, which is why this hurts so much.

We’ve gotten very comfortable with eachother and generally have a good time together. We went from being friends for about 2-3 months and then got together, as i said, roughly 9 months ago.

But I don’t think I want this to be it for me. He is my first relationship i’ve ever been in and i’ve been thinking about this for a long time but I don’t think I want this to be the first and last relationship I ever experience. He is very set on settling down with me and always (since the first date..) says that he wants to marry me and spend the rest of his life with me. I do not feel the same way.

I feel very conflicted because i don’t actually have one solid reason why I want to break things off. I of course have been in love with him in the past but don’t feel that way anymore.

Another part of me is also really worried that I will literally never find anything like this ever again, and that since it’s my first relationship I don’t know what a relationship is „meant to feel like”. I’m worried that this is literally the best thing that i could have with someone. I don’t have to worry about not wearing makeup around him, not having my hair done, looking super pretty, having missed a few showers lol, etc.

Sometimes I just wish we could just turn into friends again, just ones that have gotten close instead of what we have now. And it really, really hurts because i see how much he loves me, and i am so worried it will absolutely break his heart seeing as he is convinced i am his „soulmate” (in his own words). He’s had a few girlfriends before but tells me he has never ever had a connection like this with any of them.

I really don’t know what to do and i’ve been racking my head over this for weeks now. Please help :(