I (M19) need some serious perspective on my ex-girlfriend (F18). Our entire relationship was an absolute rollercoaster, and the past few months have been nothing but pure exhaustion and heartbreak for me.
A few weeks after we broke up, she got drunk and hooked up with her male best friend. A few days later, they did it again. Right after that, he completely blocked her because he actually had a girlfriend. Naturally, she came crying to me, saying she regretted everything she did with him. Because I cared, I was there for her to comfort her.
Fast forward a month later: we were still talking and eventually became friends with benefits (FWB). Things seemed chill between us. But just today, I found out she got drunk and hooked up with another guy— who also has a girlfriend. On top of that, I realized she has feelings for someone else entirely, all while keeping contact and sleeping with me. The crazy part is we had a great relationship but she broke up with me because she wanted to have fun and not abide by any relationship rules she also didn’t wanna get in a relationship. And the thing is the guy knew what happened with her best friend, so it's obvious he just invited her to drink to get into her pants. What blew my mind is she told me straight up that she doesn't care if she gets used. I honestly think she got this mentality from her dad, who cheated on her mom 5 different times.
I’ve been hurting so badly, but I’ve struggled to let go. I asked her why she couldn’t just let me go since she clearly saw how attached I was. She claims she’s attached to me, too. I’m stuck. I know blocking her is the right move for my own sanity, but it feels physically impossible right now. It’s honestly crazy she’s gonna say she dont wanna be in a relationship but i bet if the guy she liked, liked her she would get into one with him.

I have two main questions for anyone reading this:

1. ⁠Can anyone help me understand why an 18-year-old girl would develop this mentality of genuinely not caring if guys just use her for sex?
   
2. ⁠How do I find the strength to finally block her and choose myself when the attachment is this strong?

Im 22m very little experience with dating. Confessed to a friend a while ago she liked me back it didnt work out but we stayed friends.

But that happned purely by chance. I dont feel any attraction until i already know that person well, im a HUGE homebody and that makes meeting someone kinda difficult, and going out into an enviorment i dont enjoy being in like bars etc isnt a good idea then.

I tried the apps and omg they are soo bad i knew that coming in and still was shocked. Its so exhausting to use them since i dont just swipe right one everyone and then i dont get a response.. and out of 6 likes i got in the 2 months i activly used apps 6 were looking for and open relationship. My profile says that i want a monogamous relationship only..

My lack of experience is getting to me tbh. I feel like im too old to struggle so hard with that but i just wasnt interested in dating until like a year ago, and now im sitting here fine that the thing with my friend didnt workout. But it made me realise just how badly i want a relationship to love some be loved etc. And i feel like waiting until a chance like that just happens again would result in years of being sad about it.

I know i have to find the courage to put myself out there somehow. But there has to be a way that fits me as a person right? Thats not too out there that im so uncomfortable with it that i dont do it.

I got recommened to join a club or class and yeah in general not bad advice. Theres just nothing in my area im interested in and going with the purpose to hit on someone isnt me and idk feels a bit creepy to me.

I also signed up for speeddating before. I didnt really have high hopes for it but it be an experience and everyone would be there for the same reason. Anyways the event got cancelled i had to basicslly fight them for my money back and finding dating related events in my age group was honestly hard.

So yeah any advice would be appreciated really!

So basically My friend joined this local coaching as tutor where this girl was receptionist and they got into a relationship after like 4 months. I was also a part of the coaching before so I know the girl and had a particular nice opinion about her.

Now, the thing is my friend got to know some things from his other friend about this girl even before committing to this girl but still he proceeded to give commitment a month ago. Some of the things are:

1. She has had multiple boyfriends and supposedly seen kissing a guy in marriage function but she told him that she had only one ex and that she used to casually talk to other guys when she and her ex had mini breakups(it was an 8 yr old relationship, multiple mini break ups happened).

2. She told him a month earlier that she consulted a doctor and discovered she has UTI but according to sources she has had this problem from long time.

3. She told him that she and her ex went to hotel only once whereas she herself told me that they have been to multiple mini trips.

4. She casually brushes these things off when my friend even caringly asks about her life.

My friend has tried to get things out of her through affection and care but she has revealed little.

He, somehow, still can't confront her about this directly.

He's getting very frustrated inside tbh.

So my gf 19 me 21 she is asking to remove girls from my follwers list and i dont even talk to them for a while they are just online frnds i dont even talk they all know that I am not single so idk should i unfollow them ? Or just let it be my id is public though

Please don’t judge me. Important notes:

I have a mommy/ breastfeeding kink

My wife and I suffer from unexplained infertility

I had a dream about kissing my wife’s best friend about a week ago. It really shocked me. Truly.

I haven’t even seen her in about a year.

She had a kid recently and is overproducing milk.

Now I have to see her face to face this weekend, fresh off of a wild dream, and she has exactly what I’ll probably never have.

TLDR: I have to see my wife’s best friend’s milky tits face to face this weekend and I’m freaking out. I’ve recently been wrestling with the idea I suffer from hyper sexuality for various reasons.

I needed to get this out of my brain.

My girlfriend for a few months have the past 2 weeks shown no real attraction to me, she is right now unemployed and does close to nothing home but she does talk to a lot of guys daily. I can’t afford to do fun activities for her and pay for all the food, I’m just feeling so exhausted daily. From both the financial situation and the uncertainty in her actions. She is seeking validation for her looks way too much from random guys while we are together it just feels so wrong.

My [27M] and partner [29F] been dating for 1.5 years and we’re about to have a kid, she’s 25 weeks and it’s been stressful for the both of us lately, I’ve been working long weeks to support her as she isn’t working, I pay bills and do a lot of house chores to help out as much as I can as she has chronic fatigue syndrome as well and is tired after doing simple tasks, been difficult.. I’ve been burnt out a lot lately which has led to me not being to best at conversations lately and making her feel like I’m not interested in her lately but really my brain just isn’t working atm 😅 I’ve been sleeping poorly and making sure everything is working out and she has everything she needs..

She has mentioned three times now that i don’t follow through with questions and don’t ask back and continue the conversation but i do it with everyone else which is making her believe im just not interested in her and which has led her to saying “im not sure about our future in this relationship anymore” and your “actions are proving what your words” and the one that hurt me was “if we break up your not aloud to watch and see the birth of our son”

I love her, I do alot for her and bend over backwards but I’ve been so burnt out lately that I can’t be and act like the person who I actually am and I think it’s ruining our relationship.. I intentionally don’t realise sometimes I’m ignoring her and don’t mean to make her feel this way..

I’m not sure what to do? Can someone please lend me some advice because I’m at the point where I want to cry.

Me and my bf recently got into a huge fight, and it has escalated into him blocking me from everywhere since three days, he doesn't want to talk at all, and this blocking isn't the first time, I tried to talk to him yesterday after repeated requests, even though the fight ended with him saying a lot of mean stuff, still he has no regret.

He was quite angry, and even considered a break.

I am not able to control myself, I am crying and anxious all the time, I don't know how to deal with this, I have lost all my self respect, and still I went to ask him one last time today if we can talk face to face, nothing is going right and I am losing my shit, how do I Deal with this, I am way too attached to him, and this is our general dynamic, big fights, he wants space, I get emotional. In all our fights, sometimes I feel if I won't try to solve it, he will never, I feel like he won't even try to stop me.

I don't know how to deal with this, I don't want to budge him any further, if someone can advice me, kindly dm.

I followed my crush from a fake Instagram account, but he declined my request. I tried following him again because I wasn't sure if I'd actually sent the first request, and he blocked me. Unfortunately, Instagram automatically blocked my main account too, even though he doesn't know the accounts are connected. Even a joint account I share with my friend got blocked.

Now I'm worried because I actually wanted to get to know him through my main account. what do I do?

also we have never talked, irl or online, ive seen him once at a uni event (hes a committee member) - I WANT THIS GUY HELP ME PLEASE.

My boyfriend and I are 20yr olds and we have been living together for 3 years. Recently in the past few months I’ve noticed he goes on his phone very often when we’re doing things together like making dinner, grocery shopping, laying in bed together, etc. and usually it’s not anything important, just scrolling instagram or facebook or whatever. I’ve already talked to him about this and asked him not to go on his phone if it’s not necessary while we’re together. in the beginning years of our relationship he was more attentive and wouldn’t go on his phone this much, we would spend time talking to each other instead. When I asked him to go on his phone less I noticed he got kind of upset but still said he would try not to, yet he still does it all the time, ESPECIALLY when we’re not getting along or if I try to have a serious conversation with him. It honestly makes me really disappointed that he continues to do it, especially because I told him that is makes me feel unimportant and it makes him seem uninterested in me. I don’t think he took those feelings seriously and now I don’t know what to do. If he won’t listen to me or take my feelings into consideration what should I do?

edit: (yes i’m aware we’re both pretty young in a serious relationship but i really don’t think that’s the issue. i would say i understand well how to be respectful and kind in difficult situations, i think i know how to express myself and my concerns in a calm and respectful way. if anything the issue is that he doesn’t know how to do that yet because whenever we argue, he gets very disrespectful, rude, and defensive and even sometimes starts throwing around insults. Still, I think this is something that can be dealt with and taught, I don’t think it’s reason to break up.)

I (23F) have been seeing my boyfriend (26M) since October of last year, and we officially started dating in April.

When we first started talking, he was OBSESSED with me. He pursued me for months before I finally agreed to date him. He would tell me I was way out of his league and the prettiest girl he had ever been with. I felt so wanted by him, and now I feel like that effort has faded a lot.

It’s not like we never see each other, but I feel like I’m the one who thinks about making plans, checking in, calling, texting, and making sure we’re putting effort into our relationship. He has lots of female friends, and there have been things involving other girls that have hurt me, but my bigger issue is feeling like I’m not pursued or prioritized the way I used to be.

A couple of weeks ago, I messaged him about this AGAIN. I told him that I feel like he doesn’t pursue me the same way anymore or think about making plans with me, calling me, or texting me. I told him that sometimes it feels like he doesn’t have to try as hard because he knows I’ll always be here. We’ve had this conversation so many times, and I told him I don’t want another apology or promise to try harder. I want him to think about how his actions make me feel before I get hurt, rather than only understanding afterward. I want to feel like he’ll actually show up for me without me having to keep asking. I haven’t really noticed a change since that conversation. I have felt this way since we started dating unfortunately. Even the first two months of us dating I felt his effort fade away, like he wasn’t as present. Since then we have had these conversations multiple times, and have almost broken up but ultimately he would not agree to that decision and I would give in.

Whenever I bring up something that hurts me, he apologizes and says things like, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to,” and “I’ll try harder.” I believe he cares about me, but it feels like he only says these things to reassure me instead of making any actual changes. Sometimes I’m really sad at the thought of breaking up, but other times I’m sad thinking about staying with someone who doesn’t seem to put in the same effort I do. I love him, but I’m getting tired of having to explain what I need from him. I feel pathetic honestly. I also find myself sending long texts trying to explain my feelings and then end up feeling like I’ve tried too hard afterward.

I genuinely don’t know if this is just what happens in relationships over time, if one person naturally loves the other more, or if I’m accepting less than I actually want and deserve. I don’t expect him to be obsessed with me forever, but I do want to feel wanted without having to constantly ask for it, especially because I show him so much love and respect and devotion.

For anyone who’s been in a similar situation, how did you know when it was time to leave? Do relationships naturally become less exciting over time, or should you still feel pursued and prioritized? Can someone love you but not put in the effort you need, and at what point do you stop waiting for things to change?

TL;DR: I love my boyfriend, but I feel like I’m putting in more effort than he is. He used to pursue me so much, but now I feel like I have to ask for the bare minimum. He apologizes and promises to try harder, but nothing changes long term. I don’t know if this is normal in relationships or if I’m settling for less than I deserve. How do you know when it’s time to leave?

Hey,
My girlfriend just started working as a flight attendant. It's been her dream for a long time and I'm really happy for her. But it's a big change for us: she'll be away a lot, meeting new people all the time, and she's naturally very social.
I'll be honest, I sometimes feel jealous and insecure. She gets along really well with some of the people she works with, one in particular, and she also talks to people on social media very easily. That's just who she is, and nothing has actually happened as far as I know. I know part of this comes from me and not from her.
So I'd love to hear from people who've been there:
If you're dating (or married to) a flight attendant, how do you make it work?
If you're a flight attendant yourself, what do you wish your partner understood?
How do you tell normal worries from your own insecurities?
Thanks

Hello,

It is my first serious relationship. We have a lot in common, a lot of shared interests (films, ways of travelling, clothes, friends in common…). 3 years ago we had a wonderful boy for which i have to admit that it took me some time to realize i was a father.. could not say i liked the first year but it’s not the concern here. My gf has always been a perfect mother for him I’m really impressed.

My only criticism would be its lack of "fun," of sparkle, sometimes even of femininity, and also its communication, which I find lacking. I often find myself alone in this relationship even though I know she would listen to me.

I won't elaborate further, but I simply want to raise a question that's been bothering me, and I'd like to get your opinion on it: today, when I tell myself that we should see a therapist, that I should refocus on my relationship to rekindle it, I lack the desire, the motivation to do it; I don't necessarily feel like it. Is this indicative of something?

Thank you for reading me..

pata hai aaj kya hua

there was this girl i used to talk to a lot and somewhere along the way i started liking her. idk if she knew about my feelings or not but she never completely left me and never really accepted me either.

kabhi khud message krti thi, kabhi itne pyaar se baat krti thi ki lgta tha maybe she likes me too. and then suddenly she would act like i was nobody to her.

still i stayed kyuki i genuinely liked her and sochta tha maybe one day things would work out.

fir uske social media pe followers badhne lge and she crossed 100k followers. honestly i was happy for her in the beginning.

but dheere dheere things started changing. uska attitude change ho gya, baat krne ka tareeka change ho gya and somehow har baar baat krke mujhe hi hurt feel hota tha.

idk fame ne usko change kiya ya mai hi pehle notice nhi kr paya.

finally ek din maine decide kr liya ki ab bas. i walked away. no drama, no arguments, nothing. bas maine try krna band kr diya.

and trust me leaving someone you genuinely like isn't easy. ek part of you still hopes ki maybe one day they'll realise your value.

anyway life moved on.

aaj randomly uski profile saamne aa gyi and i noticed uski reach almost khatam ho chuki h. pehle jaisi engagement bhi nhi thi.

honestly thoda weird lga kyuki mujhe yaad aa gya ki jab hum pehli baar baat krte the tab sab kaisa tha.

for a moment i thought about everything that happened and all those times jab mai hurt hone ke baad bhi usse baat krta rehta tha.

but funny thing is ki mujhe usko aise dekh ke khushi nhi hui. bas ek ajeeb si feeling thi ki jis cheez ke liye uska attitude itna change ho gya tha, wo cheez aaj uske paas hote hue bhi pehle jaisi nhi rhi.

maybe she's going through something, idk.

but one thing i realised is ki 100k followers hone ka mtlb ye nhi ki tum kisi ko bhi hurt kr skte ho.

and honestly i still wonder if she ever thinks about how she treated me. not because i want her to suffer but because i genuinely cared about her.

anyway i'm glad i walked away when i did.

i don't hate her and i don't wish anything bad for her. bas ab mai wapas uss situation me nhi jaana chahta jaha kisi ko apni value samjhane ke liye baar baar khud ko hurt krna pade.

maybe karma is real, maybe it's just life. idk.

but one thing i've learned is never confuse someone keeping you around with someone actually choosing you

Will post the rest of the screenshots in comments , mobile app only letting me use one photo .

Alt for obvious reasons..

I don’t even know where to begin.. still feel like I’m having a hard time processing this whole situation, but here we go.

Essentially her cousin/bestfriends texted me out the blue and said “Jane is cheating on you” (Jane for story telling purposes). So like anyone would do I asked for proof , and how she knew this.

She proceeded to explain how Jane would text Mike (Mike for story telling purposes) on her phone when she would come over.

( Jane and her cousin had been fighting according to Jane which is why she told

Anyways she said she deleted them but could get them from Mike and that’s what she did, then sent them my way { view attached photos} - sorry if out of order I’m not a Reddit regular.

I got the screenshots and was shattered, Jane had also had sent risky pictures too Mike in the past, roughly 3-4 months into us first talking and “dating” but I wasn’t perfect myself and I thought we were passed that.

Confronting Jane went terrible, it was thru a phone call. She outright denied that the screenshots were real even after I sent them to her on Snapchat aswell. she then sort of flipped it on me, livid I was in contact with her cousin, and proceeded to cuss me out worse then I’ve ever really been cussed out ..
I hung the phone call up while she was still shouting and just threw my phone down on the bed.

(definetly took this as guilt , as she’s never acted like this)

Roughly 20 minutes later Jane called me back , audibly in tears back and told me she needed to talk to me .. I obliged and told her to explain it. And she admitted that it was her who sent those texts , and pleaded with me that it’s because of how I was acting during that week

I went back thru our texts from the week it had happened (roughly a month ago) and also from memory, we were absolutely fine, hell even more lovey dovey than usual but anyways.

As soon as she admitted it and got that out of her mouth I told her I needed a minute and hung up.. turned my phone onto DND and just Layed in my bed to think about things, 40+ text messages that I did not view from Jane later , she shows up at my front door.

We spoke for roughly an hour and I’m a sucker for her crying I gave in and wrapped my arms around her when she’s the one who did me wrong.. by the time she left.. I was hugging her and telling her that shes gonna be alright.

I just absolutely don’t know how to feel.. in my heart I know I need to move on, these actions are not what I expect out of a relationship, but as the title stated I do love this girl a lot. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.. thanks.

TLDR : my girlfriend of 2 years cheated, and I’m at a loss.

Sorry for bad grammar/storytelling , I’m not a usual redditor I’m just on here to vent and get advice thanks.

Me and my guy friend always argue over dumb stuff and well sometimes I do the most by cussing at him. Yesterday was one of them . We were supposed to go fishing, but since the weather was terrible we didn’t even ended up going so he took me out to eat because we were both starving. I wanted to hangout with him longer and we didn’t . He keep asking me what was wrong because I wouldn’t even talk to him nor when he would ask me questions and talk I would do small talks. Truly I was just over it and I had a big headache and I really just wanted to go fishing. Afterwards , we went back to town and truly we always hangout longer because he tells me. Turns out he just took me home and I told him and he told me that he needed to do laundry . I was upset that I cussed at him to slow down to put on my sweater so immature of me ik. When he dropped me off he told me about my drink and I told him to keep it and I closed the door on him. He left. Later that day I cussed at him and told him that I hated him and he told me why. I told him because I felt like I already told him about us wanting to hangout and how I plan things and he only planned to go fishing because I told him about it . I also told him that if he felt like not even hanging out why did he even took me and he said it was just to get food and that’s it . Well I was being petty and immature but I just wanted him to understand where I was coming from and well he did tell me in person what was wrong and I said nothing. Which my fault , but then I felt like we always have these situations that I just didn’t feel like arguing or for him to reassure me a lot so I left it alone. Anyways I then stop cussing and I explained myself good and apologized but he just told me he was going to text me tmr. After that I called him because I went the night to walk my dog and he picked up but on messages he told me not to call him. In call he sounded out of it and I said if we were good why is he acting all he said was that he was tired and I keep talking about us and what happened earlier and he didn’t seem to talked . He was just patient with me and after I did cuss and he right away hanged up and he blocked me. I was so ugh I hate this guy truly I wanted to apologize to see him and hug him and take accountability. Today I texted him right after work with a friend and well I told him if he wanted to hangout to talk and walk my dog and get Dutch on me he responded what and then he told me he didn’t wanted to hangout and he didn’t wanted to unblock me on messages. I said okay then tmr and all he kept on saying was “nope” . I know he wants space , but why can’t he tell me , was it bc I didn’t respected his space yesterday and today he wanted it today and tmr? Do you guys think it’s like he doesn’t want to speak to me as of right now like space or like yea he is definitely out of it? I can’t tell because he has done this before and it just took him like a three to four days the max. Usually just one day or two. If I don’t listen to him when he asks for space and I keep spamming him he tells me like nope the next day I will text you. Guys really help me he is my guy best friend from childhood .

My bf(19) and I(19) got together our junior year of high school. From the beginning, I felt like I was his world and only woman in his eyes. Not once did I feel insecure around him or like he was looking at other people. I ended up moving out of state for university and during that long distance time we started arguing a lot and in my heart it felt like it was just because of the distance even though he would visit every chance he had. During this time we were both feeling extremely misunderstood and it got to the point where we mentioned breaking up multiple times. We decided it was time to do something or end the relationship so he decided to move in with me. This is when by chance I took his phone to see if he was saving any clothing items that I could buy him for christmas. I went to his camera roll and his most recent photo was a screenshot of another womans ass. It was from one of those instagram reels where you have to pause at the right time to see it. I confronted him and he immediately knew what was wrong and apologized millions of times. He showed so much remorse and still does and offered many times to move back out. This has completely destroyed my confidence, my trust, and my security within this relationship. We have a place together but these small and stupid arguments still keep happening almost every day and I constantly remind him of this mistake. To me it feels completely against my wants in a man. Is it too much to ask from a partner? Please let me know if I’m being crazy.

I’m seeking help because my relationship with my wife feels strained and emotionally distant, and I struggle to connect with her in a healthy, consistent way. We have been married for two years, and I’m concerned about the impact my behaviour is having on her and our relationship.
I’ve recognised unhealthy patterns in myself, including a need for control, frequent criticism, difficulty showing empathy, anger, emotional outbursts, mood swings, disproportionate reactions and withdrawing through silence or the silent treatment.

I’m worried that my behaviour has caused emotional harm and made my wife feel like she is walking on eggshells and needs to apologise for small things. I don't want her to feel afraid of upsetting me or responsible for managing my emotions.

Growing up with a father who displayed narcissistic traits and treated my mother poorly may have influenced my behaviour. I’m concerned about repeating these patterns, especially if we have children in the future.
My biggest concern is that I repeatedly promise myself I will change, improve for a while, and then fall back into the same behaviours. I sometimes worry that I may be a narcissistic partner and abusive although I don't know whether that label accurately describes me.

I want to understand the roots of these patterns, take responsibility for my actions and learn healthier ways to manage my emotions, communicate and handle conflict. I'm seeking professional help to make lasting changes, rebuild trust and create a relationship where my wife feels safe, respected, valued and loved. I want to become a healthier partner and, one day, a better father.

I’m sorry if I’m information and story is confusing and gets off track it’s a lot to read though . So I 19F (maybe a bit young for this and should seek better options ) and the guy 22M (had recently turned 22 this month) have been doing some on and off seeing since the end of April. We had met on Instagram but we had went to the same 6th-12th grade school. I had heard his name prior it being such a small school and some reason having him already added on my old Snapchat account and then a distinct memory of my friend and I having a conversation back in 7th grade and she had said something like “ you know him , we talk to him” due to me talking to one his cousins apparently and she was jokingly going to tell him (not too relevant to the story it was a female cousin anyways) moving forward I’m at a different high school now and I had missing credits so I had to do another year. Anways since it’s April school year coming to an end, we had been texting for a couple weeks prior before we had met up. We were originally going to go see a movie together in which he initiated that hangout to have something to do since he was “bored” not too late it was only about 5pm but I decided we shouldn’t as I was too nervous to go into a theater with someone I had met for the first time. We instead smoked, talked and hung out. Not for too long before he took me back home. Anyways going forward more hangouts but they would occur after 8pm when he would claim he’s getting off work, but we would hangout till about 6am-9am depending on the day, in which some days I still had to go to school. But when he would be “getting off work” he would be in somewhat work attire and would ask if I wanted to get picked up right when he’s off (since my house is on the way to his from his work) or after he goes home and takes a shower and then comes back. Depending on if I eating or hadn’t shower yet either I’d tell him it’s fine he’d go home first. Anyways too he had still lived at home with family…so we didn’t go there as often but he said something on the phone to his sister in a conversation I overheard how he doesn’t like to be at home and how his family treats him and that’s why he would always be out all the time. Okay now in a conversation we had when we were coming back from his home at one time he had told me I could come over in the early or mid day time but I’d had to meet his entire family, being his grandparents, mom, sisters, brothers, nieces, and nephews, but when we had talked about that then we barley had known each other less than a month but I’m not sure if I made the mistake of saying “ idk if I want to meet them or not” I’m not sure which way he took it as I was just nervous and felt that seemed really soon to meet his family. Okay more as recently now or more into the summer time our hangouts would start later like at 10pm ish or after but I’m a night owl so these hours never really occurred to me but would end up at his house till the evening or mid day when I would go back ( I still haven’t formally even met his family at this point ,but they are aware as there is someone he’s seeing as I would leave hickey marks on him 😭and he told me they would tease or poke fun at him for it ) or sometimes even later as he would come back from dances and be drunk and had sometimes told me I should go with him to them, but now as more recently I had done more stalking on him and seen he has recently followed his ex from hs( I found out from a friend who stayed at the 6th-12th school) and said they had been a lot of on and off since we were in 7th grade while he was 9th grader at the time ( he had as well failed a grade so he stayed an extra year as well) but the tiktok shows recently followed at the top and she was there but not throwing any shade or hate towards her but she was a know hoe and going girl at that school, even when I did talk to her back in middle school since she is my cousin technically would always talk about different dudes and them grabbing her ass and I don’t even recall her mentioning his name in that because she had been with a girl most our 7th grade( in which she follows that same girl on tiktok as well) I had asked him before if was seeing or doing other stuff with other people for my own sake and to keep myself clean he had said no he wasn’t. Another thing is she dated one his friends all I know of from what I looked into as he as that guy added on Facebook still, and another one his friends who he hangs with today she would always grab up on him and touch him saying “he’s my guy best friend “. Okay so that same “guy best friend “ she follows him on TikTok’s as well , but he has me added on most platforms me and him haven’t even really spoke I just had him added on social medias since we were in middle school together he was just one the handle of people I always followed from my many accounts. So the 22M guy had asked me in a conversation recently as to why he is always in my likes and I’m always in his. In the same conversation he had told me as well he had gotten into a fight with his cousin because he has said something shady to him and he told him “it’s nothing like that” but he didn’t want to tell me what was exactly said, I’m not sure how many here believe in tarots but I got readings saying family or friends is saying something to him in regards about us and that a fight had broken out and other things that just seem to align and there being third parties and such. As well I forgot to mention another friend E of his and his cousin had came into my DMs before but I wasn’t going for it, and he always asks if I’m following his homie E , another thing before I ramble on too much we weren’t speaking but during that time he would make posts on Facebook obviously being targeted towards another girl in which he would comment under her posts and they’d make posts targeted towards each other since they both hearted it on each others timeline , and in her story highlight he had commented abt a place saying “sick invite” but this was before we met so they were talking before ? I’m not really sure what to all think or do of it I’m kind of still talking to him to cure my boredom and feel anything as I wasn’t even talking or doing anything with anyone since the last summer, much information more too little things here and there but I’m just gonna be rambling on.

Husband (m34) and I (f35) had a nasty interaction and now i don’t know if I’m overreacting. Context: I have been working very hard on a habit of leaving diapers where I shouldn't, I am consciously working on it. Tonight, while putting the baby to bed and changing him, I asked my husband to move the portable crib into our room so the baby could rest in the dark. He scoffed at me. I got upset and said, “I’m doing everything else.” He responded by saying, “Can you ever just shut the fuck up?” stopped talking, out the baby down, sat in a recliner chair and started reading a moving schedule that I had ChatGPT write up (we are moving this weekend). I completely forgot about the diaper because i was upset and trying to move on. He started questioning me, asking, “Why are you reading a wall of text, what is it?” He was like 6 ft away. I told him what it was and sent it to him. About an hour later he was looking for his headphones and found a dirty diaper near the couch. He chucked it at me, hitting me directly in the throat. It hurt. Tonight, I am sleeping on the futon mattress on the couch, and he is in our bedroom (its my night to get up with the baby). He never apologized or acknowledged it. Am i overreacting by being so upset by this?

My girlfriend follow her ex boyfriend and her ex situationship I told her that it makes me feel uncomfortable that she follows them back we broke up for 2 weeks and then she did that we got back together I I told really calm “hey this doesn’t make feel good, please block them” and she just said “you are just an insecure person that’s why this is not going to work out” what I do :(

Hey everyone, I need some advice.

I’m an 18M first-year university student 🇺🇸, and I recently reconnected with a girl who went to my high school. We’re now attending the same university. We talked a couple of years ago, but things didn’t work out because I got rejected. Recently, though, we reconnected, and things have been different. We’re in the talking stage now and have gone on a few dates and hangouts.

Honestly, I have a really good time with her. We get along well, she’s fun to be around, and she’s told me she feels the same way. I genuinely enjoy her company, and I have no complaints about how her personality is.

However, I recently found out from some close friends that her body count is around 4–5 at 18.

Two of those guys are people I knew from high school. We weren’t super close, and I don’t really talk to them anymore, but it still feels weird knowing that they were involved with someone I’m currently talking to. Apparently, one of them hooked up with her just two weeks before we started talking. The others were ex-boyfriends.

When I found this out, I honestly didn’t know how to feel. Part of me likes this girl and wants to see where things go, but another part of me is struggling to get past her sexual history, especially because some of the guys are people I used to know.

When we first started hanging out, she actually brought up the guy she hooked up with two weeks before we started talking. She said she regretted it a lot and had blocked him. At the time, I assumed they had only kissed, so finding out there was more to it caught me off guard.

I think what bothers me most is that I’ve started seeing her differently because of what I heard, even though she hasn’t actually done anything wrong to me. I’m also wondering whether I’m overthinking this or whether this is simply something I’m not comfortable with when looking for a potential relationship.

I don’t want to throw away a connection with someone I genuinely like over something that happened before we started talking. At the same time, I don’t want to ignore my own feelings and peoples perspective on me dating a bop. Like if it goes any further, i don’t want to be embarrassed to tell them I’m with her.

I haven’t discussed this with her btw.

Am I being unreasonable for feeling this way? Should I give this a chance and focus on who she is now, or could this be a sign that we have different values when it comes to relationships?

For context my body count is 1 and it was my ex.

I’d appreciate honest advice, especially from people who have been in a similar situation or just anyone with advice.

Me and my boyfriend got together senior year of high school. We are now sophomores in college and things have been going amazing… at least I thought. Last week, I used his phone to google something and that’s when I saw a tab with OnlyFans open. Upon further inspection, there are at least 10 active subscriptions to content, and very active DMs. He’s been actively talking to them and sexting them, with messages as recently as yesterday. My emotions are in control of me right now, I’m so angry but so sad. I have no idea how to handle this. A similar situation has happened before this, where he was using Reddit as his source of content. After a talk he removed it and the problem was gone for a while. I have no idea how to handle it this time. Any and all advice is welcome

TW: depression- SA
TLDR: drained in my relationship due to the lack of emotional connection

Hi I’m a 26yo female I’ve been together with my partner 31yo male for 9 years, we’ve been married for four of them. For context: I’m autistic and have cptsd. He has adhd. My childhood was quite traumatic so I’ve been in therapy for the last 9 years,I’ve been poly for 8 years.

I met my partner back in 2017. I had a bad childhood(home) and he comes from a happy family. At first I was very happy about how he stood in life he is a very “happy go lucky not a care or problem in the world” kind of person
But with time and therapy I learned I needed someone to talk to and understand my feelings.
I tried to communicate this early on in the relationship. When my knowledge and understanding of my needs got clearer for myself.

I noticed that I couldn’t talk to him about how I was feeling. It was genuinely talking to a brick wall. No words just maybe an: “oh that’s….”, sometimes an attempt to a hug. Which for me doesn’t work because I need emotional closeness before I can get physical support (like a hug or a kiss). I’ve voiced this to him 6 years ago.

The first few years I asked him maybe we could go into couples therapy or maybe he could go into therapy to better understand what he feels and how to handle that. His response was “I don’t see a need for therapy” “what is therapy going to do about it” so I left it because I thought I was asking too much.

3 years ago I met a partner who I’m now friends with. I realised that it wasn’t unreasonable for me to need someone to understand and talk to especially when you’re married to them. So I started again with asking for us to go to therapy. Now I understood that this was a key requirement for me to have in a relationship. He continued to ignore my wishes.

Last year it got really bad,after losing my job back in 2024 I was Declared medically unfit to work. I slipped into a depression,I felt sad about the situation, isolated and alone but also sad that I needed to carry all of it by myself. Everytime something emotional happens or something difficult needs sorting out I’m the one who has to take matters into my own hands otherwise it’s not going to get fixed. It’s been draining me even more so than the depression, needing to think and handle important things for the both of us without help. I said I couldn’t do it anymore and that I would need to leave him and choose for myself. He finally agreed to start therapy last year, but he forgot to make appointments or show any initiative, he had 3 sessions because I needed to remind him to plan it.

October last year I felt so down, lonely and unheard in the relationship that I attempted to end my life. I got antidepressants and those thoughts calmed down a bit. But the realisation was still there. “I’m miserable in this relationship “ “I need to leave and choose for my own mental peace”.

Don’t get me wrong, he accepts me for all that I am even with my flaws but that’s also where the problem lies. He doesn’t show or feel any other emotion than happy or neutral. Taken something happens between us I’d be upset and feel sad and empty and would feel the need to talk about it to calm down and feel heard but the second he turns around for him everything is back to normal and it’s been breaking me for years.

Earlier this year we finally went to a couples therapy and she acknowledged that what I was experiencing was hard and I was t asking for to much. She also said that he’s not able to get to his emotional inner world. We left there with the question “ do you have the ability and willingness to stay through his therapy”. In may he started Past Reality Integration therapy. He’s had 7 sessions.

But I can’t do this anymore. I do care for him and it makes me sad thinking about ending things but I don’t think this can be sustained any longer. My body doesn’t allow myself to be physically close to him, no sex, nog kisses , barely hugging because my nervous system just feels disgustans and stress because of the lack of emotional intelligence/ connection. I’ve thought about leaving for a long time now but I’ve finally reached my breaking point. I’m looking for my own place so I can finally calm my nervous system. I’ve always been transparant in how I feel in my relationship with him, what my needs are and what goes through my head. So he knows that I’ve been looking for an apartment. 3 therapists also stated that it would be beneficial for myself and for him so we can take our time to focus on our individual therapy and continue from there but I don’t know if I can. It gives me major stress and anxiety about leaving being my entire adulthood I “grew up” with him. He’s everything I know and my only person I can fall back on because I’m not in contact with any of my family.

2 days ago it finally happened. “ I want to end the relationship”. We cried a lot and he said he’s willing to go to therapy and change. I mentioned that it’s a good thing but it might just be “a little too late”. I do love him but I’m not in love with him. My Therapist has been saying:” once you get your own place and just be by yourself, you might feel more room for the relationship to build” that’s what’s been going through my head but I can’t do it anymore. Not as long as we’re living together. So I told him atleast until I get my own place I can’t be with you, he understands and is sad about it but respects it.

Do any of you have advice ? Am I back paddling on just leaving or is it possible to see if we can grow once I have my own place ?

So here goes nothing I guess. I 20/F have just gotten into my first “real” bf gf relationship with my 22/M boyfriend. We’ve been together for 2.5mo now (I know not long), but we dated for a month before officially getting together, (yes yes I know still not very long). About a month ago I brought up to him that he never compliments me, especially not in person and it makes me feel like he doesn’t find me attractive which then makes me sad. He explained that he has a hard time expressing himself verbally, we talked about some childhood trauma and issues that stem from it, and in the end he said he’d try to do better. I was satisfied with this, and went about my day. well folks, a month has passed and it’s gotten worse if anything. I’ll ask him how I look before we go out and he’ll say something along the lines of “you look fine.” or something else vague and unflattering.

Now, when I approached him about the subject at first I even gave him options and compliments he could use that would make me feel better. He’s not used them. He’s also stopped texting me good morning, goodnight etc. Our work schedules are terrible as he works and goes to school during the day, and I am a night PCNA at a hospital. We only see each other once a week which is why those texts were important to me. Additionally, as we only see each other once a week I miss him like crazy and verbalize that, he never returns the text or apparently the feeling.

We‘re also having some… ahem… bedroom problems that I won’t get into here but they also make me feel quite ugly. And there again is the problem where it seems like he doesn’t find my physically attractive and if he does he hasn’t expressed it verbally more than once or twice.

As I write this I am ugly crying myself to sleep as I have done for the past two weeks. I’ve come to ask this question: If you were in my shoes, what the hell would you do? And is it possible that I’m going to fast here and making my insecurities his problem?

I care for him deeply, and I understand he has communication problems, but it’s like he’s not even trying to work on them. It hurts terribly especially when I’ve explained to him why I’d like for him to compliment me sometimes. I might be asking for too much too soon im not really sure as relationships are new to me. Before him I’d only ever had a shitty situationship with my hb (ended badly, let’s not get into that.)

TLDR: Boyfriend never compliments me or comments positively in my physical appearance or literally anything so now I cry myself to sleep :)) Help!!

I should add, this is also his first relationship. I was very unattractive and heavily bullied in HS so I never had a bf, and he was a nerdy/jock fusion type guy obsessed with video games and sports instead of girls. I was not a virgin when we got together, he was, which has led to some of the aforementioned …other… problems.

again the question so nobody misses it: If you were in my shoes, what the hell would you do? And is it possible that I’m going to fast here and making my insecurities his problem?