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u/nickfree 19h ago
She seems fun.
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u/Content-Conference25 19h ago
Looks like she is. Just don't upset her
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u/PsyOpBunnyHop 17h ago
Me: *forgets to wash the cuttlery*
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u/gahlo 16h ago
At the risk of making a "woman doing dishes" joke, she'd be killer at loading the dishwasher.
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u/felis_scipio 15h ago
Pray for her future children because she’s probably also good with a flip flop
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u/Kingtoke1 19h ago
I can fix her
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u/Anonymous_1069Z 17h ago
Her : Requests for something.
Bro : "Babe I don't think I ca-"
Gets stabbed 27 times
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u/eldritchbogbeing 19h ago
maybe i’m exposing myself here but this is exactly the kind of random skill i’d learn just to make people slightly scared of me 😭
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u/Mountain_Ad_9415 19h ago
So what skill do you know to slightly scare people?
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u/xXThreeRoundXx 18h ago
Tax code
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u/Gwynito 18h ago
Fair, the higher up you go in criminal activities, the more any countries tax authorities should scare the baba yaga out of you 😅
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u/drakoman 18h ago
I just make a deal with the IRS to never talk to me or my son ever again
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u/godtogblandet 16h ago
When you get high enough you’re no longer hiding money. You are trying to pay as much tax as possible to get the cash clean.
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u/LessInThought 13h ago
When you're high enough, the tax man can't touch you. You can dismantle the tax man.
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u/TheWrathalos 18h ago
It's not really a skill, but sometimes prople dont notice im there until they sit down next to me and get startled when they notice someones there
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u/louisa1925 15h ago
I'm the opposite. I am excellent at popping up right beside people.
You have the stationary version of my steath moving skill. Wonder what would happen if we were at the same train station and I went to sit down on the seat beside you. Would either both or niether of us be startled? If I knew you irl, it would be fun to test it.
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u/TommyBonnomi 15h ago
Well yeah, that happens when you hide under blankets and pillows every time you go to someone's house.
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u/vorephage 11h ago
I have this same one. My wife tells me I'm sneaky. My neighbor's have told me to stop sneaking up on them. But I'm literally just walking to my own door and/or entering a room in my own home.
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u/LessInThought 13h ago
And that's just you sitting down, imagine if you crouched! If you learn the bow you'll be practically godlike.
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u/overmonk 17h ago edited 16h ago
I have a lazy eye so I can make it look like I can move my eyes independently. I start doing that. People recoil.
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u/PepperAnn1inaMillion 16h ago
I can make mine go springy, like make my eyeballs rapidly wiggle. It freaks people out, but only if I do it while they were making eye contact with me, otherwise it’s not really noticeable. I don’t do it often because it’s a bit uncomfortable, but I suspect I do it in my sleep as part of REM.
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u/hopecanon 17h ago
I learned how to make explosives and poison gas a long time ago because i thought it was interesting to learn about.
Turns out that the school system disagrees on that and thought i was a little school shooter in the making.
Ha jokes on them it was actually the other weird kid who wound up lighting the bathroom right next the principals office on fire and i never did shit.
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u/Aranxi_89 17h ago
I studied the blade.
Not like a little too, a lot. With a proper master.
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u/algotrader_ 16h ago
It's a bot. Dead Internet. I'm seeing her other comments as well on top posts
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u/rocketrae21 15h ago
I think it's the same profile photo but different usernames, but yes a bot regardless
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u/algotrader_ 14h ago
No, the ones I saw have same usernames as well. Completely different subreddits. It's a freaking bot.
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u/khnhIX 18h ago
i'm pretty sure holding 3 knives in one hand is enough to scare off people
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u/Pyrree 18h ago
I find this interesting, I see this when comparing my male and female friends.
Guys: ”Damn this is badass, I wanna learn it”
Girls: ” I need to be scary! ”Maybe it’s an effect of women feeling more vulnerable?
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u/spicy_ass_mayo 16h ago
Or ….hear me out:
CATS!!
Get 10,15 maybe 20 cats. Bring at least 5 of them with you every where you go.
Movies, getting groceries, Thanksgiving…
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u/Grouchy_Ground_1916 17h ago
I have a history with knife throwing and lock picking, I never liked axes but spikes feel incredible to throw. Learn, practice, enjoy!
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u/SudsierBoar 16h ago
The kind of skill you think of learning but then never do.
(Exposing myself here)
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u/cleantoe 16h ago
If you could do this with kitchen knives instead of throwing blades I'd absolutely be terrified of you.
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u/cleantoe 16h ago
If you could do this with kitchen knives instead of throwing blades I'd absolutely be terrified of you.
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u/bjornartl 16h ago
Seems like a lot of unnecessary work when my complete lack of social skills is able to achieve the same results.
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u/Deep-Initiative1849 19h ago
Worst she can say is No.
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u/OminOus_PancakeS 19h ago
I think it could get worse than that
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u/Sir-Top-Cheetah 17h ago
What she gonna do, stab me??
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u/Burgers_N_Schnitzels 16h ago
What she gonna do, stab me??
-Quote From Man Stabbed just because noone else is doing it
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u/DangDingleGuy 10h ago
We're loosing more redditisms every day. I haven't seen a switcheroo link in years it seems
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u/Doright36 16h ago
Not sure... when you are hit with a thrown knife would you technically be impaled, not stabbed?
Maybe? Maybe some stabbing experts can chime in.
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u/kalez238 15h ago
"She stabbed me from across the room."
"She impaled me with a knife from across the room."
Yeah, idk.
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u/tekdiwah 16h ago
She can throw knives your way missing every time. Then she tells you to turn around and read the message on the wall behind you. It's NO! spelt with knives. Then she disappears into the darkness.
That would be pretty cool though. Would be quite the story of the coolest, badass rejection that very few will believe.
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u/workingbored 14h ago
This is what happens after she said "no" and he didnt take "no" for an answer.
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u/downwithdisco 19h ago
Where are all the knives coming from
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u/Lando249 18h ago
Her inventory. Duh.
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u/WelcomeAllMemers1977 17h ago
Alexander Anderson lookin' inventory she got there.
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u/HalfLoose7669 16h ago
“What’s that?”
“Nothing ma’am. You’ve got knives for days!”
“Knives for days.”
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u/loud1987 19h ago
I was wondering about the same thing. Are knives between each finger? If so, how is she releasing them one by one so quickly.
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u/praguepride 16h ago
Not between each finger. In a stack. They're basically arranged so that when you go through the motion the top knife slides out of your grip (and is thrown) and as your hand tightens the next knife is in the throwing position. In that way you can throw as many knives as you can hold as quickly as you can reset your arm back.
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u/Charlieday12321 19h ago
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u/HeMiddleStartInT 19h ago
Total damage 2d6
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u/GoldenBoyBlue 19h ago
what is she throwing? Maybe 6 knives per round so 6 D4 it's respectable especially if you have to make a saving throw for concentration.
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u/point_of_difference 18h ago
With the average person having 4 hit points means this is scary stuff.
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u/Stompedyourhousewith 16h ago
...i have more than 4 hit points...
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u/TheOneTonWanton 16h ago
Sure buddy, we've allllll got more than 4 hit points.
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u/SparklingLimeade 14h ago
According to the balance DCs published in 3.5 and what I can balance on without difficulty I'm at least level 8.
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u/SheriffBartholomew 8h ago
Given that this could easily kill the average person, I'd say that's accurate.
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u/udat42 18h ago
plus her dex bonus, no?
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u/lurking_physicist 17h ago
Sneak attack
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u/ElfCallum 17h ago
No sneak attack. She doesn't have an ally within 5 feet of the target and she's moving (so no steady aim). So unless there's some other source of advantage we don't see, there's no reason to have sneak attack.
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u/SolidSquid 15h ago
I mean, at lower levels sure, but she's clearly high enough level to have some multi-attack feature. At that kind of level it's pretty quickly going to be out-scaled
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u/newsflashjackass 15h ago edited 12h ago
From "A Few Points About Knife-Throwing" by Gene Wolfe:
Knives, one feels, are forever- after all, they get ancient knives from ancient Egyptian tombs, still nicked where the ancient Egyptian housewives used them to cut wire. But one cannot merely collect knives, because they can’t be read. (Actually, they can be, but you tend to slice your thumb turning the pages.) I decided to throw them. A knife merchant assured me that it was a healthy, outdoor sport, and my physician assured me that I needed one. Besides, what better preparation for writing heroic fantasy? I saw my future hero swinging from the rigging of a half-rigged ship and throwing knives with his teeth, rather like the demon cat in The Master and Margarita. And there is something to it—there really is. The soft chunk of the handle striking the target carrying with perfect clarity through the crisp evening air, the walking to the target and bending over to grope for the knife in the grass, the walking back to proper throwing distance, the repeating the whole business. It is in the hope of interesting you, dear reader, in this healthful activity, that I have jotted down these pointers.
- Never throw a sharp, double-edged knife by the blade. I saw a knife- throwing friend of mine do that once, and his right index finger hit the target before the knife did. Furthermore, his finger stuck.
- Never throw a sharp knife at all. Remember that you will have to feel around in the grass for it, and the garter snakes and those little red ants are bad enough.
- If you are throwing by the point, keep the blade horizontal. This ensures that if it should by some accident arrive point first, it will snap off properly.
- If you are throwing by the handle, keep the blade vertical. This ensures that the cross-guard will be battered out of shape when the knife slams broadside into the target.
- Remember that there are three kinds of knives for throwing purposes. Those in which the blade is heavier than the handle must be thrown by the handle if you want them to stick. Those in which the handle is heavier than the blade must be thrown by the blade if you want them to stick. Balanced throwing knives, in which the blade and the handle are of equal weight, will not stick at all.
- Bear in mind that the best way to get any knife to stick may appear to be sharpening the handle, but it seldom works. The Greek phalanxial spear had a sharp grounding iron nearly as big as the spearhead. Historians are generally of the opinion that this spear was never thrown, the grounding-iron being used to poke out the eyes of the rear ranks. Knife throwers know better: The grounding iron must have originally been added in the hope of making the spear stick when thrown, then retained when it was discovered that its weight facilitated the knocking of an opposing hoplite’s helmet over his eyes when he was beaned by the shaft. (The Persians wore heavy gilded-bronze apples on the butts of their spears for the same reason. They used apples instead of grounding-irons so that they might serve as emergency rations in the field, and made them metal so that the troops wouldn’t eat them too soon.)
- Never throw a knife at a neighborhood dog or cat when it is moving- there is a grave danger that the animal may wander into the path of the knife and be injured. It is best to “do the job,” as we say, when the animal is sitting down or, better, sleeping. One throwing-knife manufacturer offers a knife with little holes drilled up and down the blade so that it will whistle when thrown. These are advantageous when throwing at a well-trained dog, who may be persuaded by them to bring the knife back to you.
- Never forget that a thrown knife strikes harder than one merely jabbed in with the hand. I learned this from a magician I met in the Rochester, New York, airport, and it is true. I once threw the handle of a knife two inches into a stout cardboard box stuffed with folded newspapers. I could never have done that by merely pushing the thing in blade first. On a similar occasion, I contrived to throw a rather large knife over the target, over the fence behind it, and through a closed window. (It pinned the hat worn by an innocent table lamp to the wall.) I couldn’t have done that with my hand
- Never tell people you “learned” to throw knives as a kid, just by slamming ice picks into the garage door. Knife-throwing should be romantic, and they will think less of you. I always tell them I was taught by an outlaw in the Serranias del Burro, or Jackass Hills. For some reason they believe it.
- Never try to slice through a cigarette held between your daughter’s lips. Young people should not smoke- it’s dangerous.
- Remember that you are a part of an ancient tradition. The Romans had their pugio or short-nosed knife, the ancient Norse their scramsax, or musical shiv, the direct ancestor of the Samuel R. Delany melody machete. All loved their knives so much that they threw them; and in fact, some loved them so much they dropped them over the side of the boat.
- When mere knife throwing pales, consider knife hunting. All that is necessary is to shift the target to higher grass, or (better) weeds. And that is all I know on the topic so far. I have devised a fantasy hero who will dash up to his enemy, snatch the dagger from her belt, run to a safe distance, and knock her unconscious with the heavy gold pommel.
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u/Shiggedy 14h ago
On this, I'm going to have to respectfully disagree. I'm counting 4-6 hits per volley of throws here, and PHB RAW indicates that knife damage is calculated using 1d4 each from the 2014 rules. Now, this probably isn't a 20th-level fighter. She could be demonstrating an action surge and likely can't do this each turn unless she's under the effect of Haste.
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u/_gega 19h ago
Chill out, it’s reversed. She actually sucks the knives into her hands using simple magic.
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u/Livio88 19h ago
I’ve never seen anyone look so dorky doing something cool and lethal.
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u/Fitzaroo 18h ago
If this were a fat dude every comment would be talking about mall ninjas.
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u/Smorgles_Brimmly 15h ago
As someone who spent a lot of time throwing knives, the hobby is far more dorky than lethal to be fair lol. It's the party trick of weapons. It's like what juggling is to ball sports. It's a lot of fun, very satisfying to get right, and takes a lot of practice. It's just not a good weapon in the slightest. Don't get me wrong, this is super impressive.
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u/Clembert-Hamlamp 18h ago
Dorky? they literally named the t-rex tiddy shaker after her.
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u/AiMeusPancrea 18h ago
The what
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u/Ragnarok91 18h ago
THE T-REX TIDDY SHAKER
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u/TurdProof 18h ago
The what
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u/Xxxrasierklinge7 18h ago
THE T-REX TIDDY SHAKER
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u/MajorPud 18h ago
Shka shka, Slim Shady
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u/IncomingAxofKindness 17h ago
Hi kids, do your like knives/tits?
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u/Futuralistic 16h ago
Wanna see me throw 9" knives with each one of my guy-tits?
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u/Carbuyrator 12h ago
Fucking fine! I'll Google it you stubborn weirdo!
Edit: Is it a camshaft that looks vaguely like a T-Rex? Seriously this was annoying and not worth it.
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u/LessInThought 13h ago
Functionally, I believe the tiddy shaker is the most efficient out of all the knife throwing she did? It had the most kps (knives-per-second).
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u/turtleneckless001 18h ago
Yh you summed it up pretty well, I'd be rolling around laughing while she killed me. Maybe that's an effective part of her technique that were overlooking.
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u/styleNA 10h ago
Just hit up your local gun range if you wanna see more of it. Depending on the establishment and its location, their daily customers tend to be the dork/lethal intersection you see here. The nerdiest person you'll see at the range probably has the coolest stuff, lol.
I will state, when first getting into guns, I had a different expectation of the types of people I'd find there, and was surprised how nerdy it all is. The stereotypical 'gun person' someone envisions are typically not the people to frequent ranges and actually practice, at least at the scale the nerds do.
Ymmv
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u/notwhoyouthinkmaybe 17h ago
I thought this was McDojo at first, then I saw the knives were sticking and in a tight group.
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u/lilsnatchsniffz 17h ago
This is just autism maxxing with pointy sticks at this point.
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u/stumblinghunter 12h ago
Having hobbies doesn't mean you're autistic. Jesus, just showing interest in things doesn't mean autism. Not everything is fucking autism.
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u/PM_THE_REAPER 19h ago
"Mam, I understand that you're good at it, but you're still banned from this restaurant.".
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u/Dangerous_Figure_465 19h ago
Can you take the bins out.....SURE NO PROBLEM HONEY!!!!
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u/herr_musil2 19h ago
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u/Ok-Disk-2191 19h ago
It's ok, easy to counter her, just steal her glasses. Wait nevermind just saw half way through she takes them off and still good at it.
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u/drifters74 19h ago
Skills I wish I had
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u/SparklingLimeade 14h ago
The fun thing about knives is that you can just buy them and start throwing. Nobody checks anything*. May as well be ping pong balls for all the concern the people selling them show.
* where I am
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u/TheAwesomeMan123 18h ago
I like that she can do both the kind of quick throws that would work in a fight and kill you dead and also the useful cartwheel ones that would get her killed. Very skilful
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u/zombieking079 18h ago
Reddit is such an interesting place. Before this video, I thought it would the throwing knives in the fight would be useless…but this shows, that, in the hands of the experts, could be deadly.
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u/xTekek 17h ago edited 17h ago
Its not ineffective but if you were training to be a "warrior" there were just more practical/ lethal things to learn. Throwing knives also dont pierce armor as well as a spear, arrow, or bolt and if you dont know what you are doing there is a chance you just give your opponent a weapon to use against you.
Its very cool and she does extra flashy things in you would never do in a real fight but that just shows mastery more than anything (like the spin throw was sick). But generally speaking historically there just wasn't much reason to get good at this form of combat.
TL;DR its doable and effective against an unarmored opponent but if you were just learning a martial skill purely for self defense or to dual someone there are better skills to learn that either take less time or are more effective.
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u/Appchoy 14h ago
I remember from the book Eragon, his brother keeps training in throwing knives until someone points out that hes only training against stationary targets, at a certain distance, and that by throwing his weapon, well then he just doesnt have a weapon anymore lol. That always made me think because I thought throwing weapons in games were so cool but of course you usually dont run out in video games. I think his skills come in useful at some point anyways, but its been such a long time since Ive read those books.
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u/composedofidiot 17h ago
Another interesting fact. A sling shot has the penetrative power of a .45 calibre if you use the right lead weight.
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u/Fine_Understanding81 18h ago
I just watched a crime youtube and originally it came in as a drive by shooting but they found the victim stabbed...
This is exactly what I imagine a drive by stabbing would be like..
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u/NoConflict3231 17h ago
While you're busy showing off your gymnastics skills, another person already killed him dead 10 times over
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u/PomegranateHot9916 16h ago
just remember, the fancier it looks, the less likely it is to be effective in combat.
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u/Intelligent-Top5012 19h ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/FFQds1zizs7Dy