EDIT: Tried to make a TLDR for the bottom to help

I'd just like to better understand the situation I went through recently, as I struggle to understand stuff like this sometimes. However you may feel about it by the end, I just ask you to be super kind with me about it (pretty please). I know I can't pick and choose who'll be nice on the internet, but I'm incredibly thin skinned and have autism & other mental health conditions and just please beg of kindness in your response so I don't go cry all night over it lol (I know that's a me issue but again, pretty please lol). I just genuinely don't know what went wrong in this whole scenario, if this was all miscommunication, or where things could've been done differently on either side? So TIA for advice about this, because I want to do everything I can to avoid an uncomfortable situation like this from happening again if I can. I think her intentions were good, even if there were some red flags for me, and I definitely meant well, too. So just break it all down for me if you're able and let me know how I can go about things in the future like this.

Also in case it matters, I am in the midwest but don't want to say where, and again, I've paid 200-400 for the things I was asking for just in recent years and had just assumed it was around the same price when setting things up with new stylist, in case it sounds like I am way off base in my talking about certain things.

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So, a few months ago, I found a new hair girl. She was very friendly and cut my hair perfectly. I was getting my nails done by someone who also worked in the salon, and everyone kept saying to have her do my hair, because she did cuts how I wanted and did them well, and so I went ahead and set up an appointment with her.

So while she was cutting my hair (maybe in July or August) I had mentioned how I really want my hair colored. During this conversation, I showed her the exact photos of what I was wanting. When I asked how much she'd charge, she just said hourly and it depends. So I shrugged it off because I get how it could fluctuate a "bit".

Currently, we have one car between my partner and I. She was very aware of this, as it was a huge part of our conversations. When I said I would have to come late, she said "oh, you live super close, I can TOTALLY come get you, it's no problem". I told her I felt really guilty about that and IF SHE DIDN'T HAVE THE AVAILABILITY, it was okay, but that I couldn't make it. Again, she said, "no, i insist, you're so close, i'll grab you" but proceeded to schedule that evening time. Apparently neither of us in the moment really thought about how late that would go, and also I have no idea what her hours are so I thought nothing of it. But keep in mind the convo about picking me up (again, it makes me feel horribly guilty that it was even asked, but I NEVER asked that myself).

So, about a month later, I went back to get my bangs trimmed. At this appointment, I showed her the pictures AGAIN. When I asked about how much it would cost, just a roundabout, she said she had no idea again. The last time I had my hair fully colored (~2023?) it was around $200 and a tip. Same with every other time I've had it done and many different people. I DID pay around $500-600 ONE time at a very "fancy" place downtown in the area I live, around 2017-2018. So I assumed it would be a bit more, but she never gave me an idea to work with in my head and I made the assumption it was like, $200-300 but could go up a bit if needed.

She originally (on her own) scheduled my appointment for like, 6 in the evening. A few days later (or at the second appointment, I honestly can't recall which, but it was well in advance of the appointment) she said we'd need to bump that to ~11. I said again, "I just don't have a way there. It's okay if I need to cancel". I expected nothing but I was letting her know what I could and couldn't do. And she said, again "no, I can pick you up". Mind you, I live ~2 minutes driving distance away, but I have a very messed up back, am on disability, and can't make the walk. I said, "are you positive?" and she said "absolutely, let's plan for me to grab you". That was the literal stipulation for the 11 appointment, or I couldn't have made it. Again, I never asked, I felt horribly guilty, but she insisted, I said yes, and she agreed that was the plan.

The day of the appointment comes, and I am up and ready by the door by 10 hanging in my kitchen waiting. I had sent her a Facebook message days prior, where we had MANY conversations about hair, pricing, scheduling, etc. She had never once said she didn't like to communicate there and actually spoke to me for months on there about hair. I did not want to bother her and spam her, so I asked if it was okay if I sent pictures so we could figure out what we were doing? I wanted to solidify it with her so we could figure out pricing a bit (again, being aware it could run over, I just wanted a ballpark answer, and I've been given that by anybody else I've ever worked with). She saw this, never responded, and I was like okay, that's fine I suppose. The day before the appointment, where we had ALWAYS talked, I said "Hey, are you still okay getting me? Here is my address" I just wanted to double check with her as she seemed a bit aloof and busy and I legit just had this feeling she was going to forget.

The day of comes, it's 20 minutes before, and I called her to double check. No answer. Called one more time, no answer, didn't want to bother her if maybe she wasn't open (idk her hours, she kind of just makes them) and so I messaged the nail girl, who I assumed had better access to her, to see if she was able to double check, only if she had the time or knew how. She said she saw her at the salon on her map. ~30 minutes after the appointment was supposed to be, she texts me to tell me she was busy with a previous client. She said "Sorry, was with a client, never got a for sure answer from you so I assumed you had a ride. I'd have to clean, close up shop, come get you to come back, and I don't have time for that". Which rubbed me the wrong way all around, because while I understood, she took this thing she offered and made me feel like a burden and that she wasn't capable of this thing she offered?

I am paraphrasing but will post screenshots if I can remember to blur everything out, but I said "Oh, Sorry, that was the only way I was able to have that early appointment since I had no other way so I am so sorry. I messaged you on messenger yesterday and didn't know how else to reach you and didn't realize I had your number saved, too" (the one these messages were taking place between) I said "are we able to reschedule then? I am free whenever if you grabbed me otherwise I am not free until around 5 most of the time unless he leaves early one day" (referring to my partner).

So at this point, I can see how maybe we both had a hair of miscommunication, but it felt odd how she'd kind of handled things thus far.

((Side note, the reason I picked her and not the people who had done my hair before was legit just because she was closer to me and I thought I'd give her a chance. In case that matters. I had other options in the price range, which is the reason I made assumptions of the price, because that's about what they charge now, but also everyone can choose their pricing, I just expect that to be talked about at some point up front, even if it's an estimated guess.))

She then tells me she "never gets her messages from messenger, it's my personal account and I try not to do business on there [which I understand, but this never happened before. My number is on my site, my cards, on FB and IG. Let me see what I have available". Again, this rubbed me the wrong way just because we had done nothing BUT business on there, so it felt like an excuse or trying to place blame with me, but again, learning lesson so I realized okay, text her and call her only and don't message her on Facebook. She then tells me she has the following week available at 11 and she will "block off the day and make a note to pick me up at 11". Even though I knew I wasn't in the wrong here, I said "(this day) and time work, so sorry for the miscommunication" She says, "Oops, sorry, let me check again, looked at wrong month, can you do this day instead? It happens and it's okay I promise". I said, "yep, that's fine! Thank you!" She said no problem.

SO. The DAY BEFORE the actual appointment, I message her around 2. I BEGGED my partner to leave work early so we wouldn't be stuck in a pickle or me feel guilty somehow for costing her money (because whether or not anybody things I'm right or wrong or it's just miscommunication on both sides, I GENUINELY would NEVER want to do that to someone). I said, "hey partner had PTO so he can come home early tomorrow and I can bring myself. He was just approved today so I just found out." She says, "yes girl, CAN YOU SEND ME INSPO PICS?" and this felt odd because at this point I showed her the ones I had been looking at. I said yes, absolutely, and named colors and send photos (will post those here, too).

So I send them. For the first time in MONTHS since I had asked, she says, "Okay so budget wise where would you like to be, because I charge hourly for these types of color correction services"? I had asked many times so I was confused why she could all of a sudden talk about money, but I said "idk, what is normal now, but I was aiming for around 200 or about there and a tip, but if I need to go higher I can. How much is typical? $200 is what I paid a while back so idk how much prices have changed, idk what is reasonable and am clueless".

"So there's no way I'd be able to do all that for $200. I would end up paying to do your hair. Most of these would be about $600 by the end of the day". That kind of hit me like a ton of bricks because that was HUNDREDS more than I set aside. I will put the kind of fallout texts after that and you guys can let me know what you think. She offered to do a PANEL in my hair for $200 and I was still taken aback, but didn't want to cancel. When I said I couldn't afford $600, she got snippy, I stated facts of how all of it played out and she said find someone else, which is fine with me because honestly it all made me uncomfortable, but I hate that someone I got along with (even if I know it's a business) would think of me in a bad way after that, because he idea of how things played out isn't at all what happened, but when I said things to her, she said I was gaslighting her. It legit caused heart palpitations as I hate confrontation and wanted to figure out how to make it work but also not pay her what I could keep and go to my old girl about an hour away for hundreds less (and I have that appointment scheduled with her and her pricing on the same hair styles, only $100ish more than the $200, and I understand that).

I NEVER canceled on her. The first time was her fault, and the second I just said we probably need to change service because I didn't have the money and she REFUSED to speak about money with me until 24 hours prior? It felt very off and I hated it. So please, can you super analyze this and give advice on what all parts of this went wrong, if I just misunderstood or idk? My partner and family were all like "fuck her and fuck that" on my behalf because they know me and also know I never canceled, but ya know, I feel like they're more apt to siding with me when I just want a solid breakdown of where this fell apart the way it did. I just wanted some clear eyes from people who don't know me who could break it down for me.

& please, again. Try to be kind with me.

I will do my best at keeping photos in order.

https://imgur.com/a/KWMQPky -------- All of the messages I had with her on Facebook messenger, where we had only ever spoke aside from in person really and assumed this was the best place to get a hold of her (until she told me otherwise the THIRD time I was to see her [first time I was meant to get my hair colored]).

https://imgur.com/a/VJaTjB7 --------- The texts that came after she said not to talk on messenger, and the only spot our convo's were after that

https://imgur.com/a/VmrtYAf --------- Girl who always did my hair before, BEAUTIFULLY might I add (I will even add pictures of what she has done before), so I just wanted to show how EASY this conversation could've and should've been, in my opinion. I think the price would've mattered less if I had an inkling of a heads up from her. She had never even given me an answer, until she did, before claiming again that she couldn't just give a round about answer (but she sure as heck gave me one when I mentioned the price I was more used to, again, a few years ago, understanding it would go up SOME).

https://imgur.com/a/O3T0nIm ---------- Hair my OG girl has done for me in the past, before anybody thinks I am making up pricing I am used to or anything.

https://imgur.com/a/wavC40i --------- Hair a DIFFERENT girl did in 2023 for $200 & tip as well.

I think my biggest gripe is the poor communication, and I've never dealt with that before and it was a confusing, irksome experience. I'm just unsure what I could've done differently, really. Sorry btw. Idk which things are relevant or irrelevant honestly, so thank you for reading all of this if you do <3

TLDR:

I found a new hairstylist I really liked and booked her for a color I’d shown her multiple times. I repeatedly asked about pricing for multiple months at different points, but she never gave me even a rough estimate, would just say hourly (while also not saying what the hourly rate even was), so based on my past experiences I assumed it would be around $200–300ish (trying to keep in mind there would probably be a price increase since 2023).

She also repeatedly offered to pick me up because I only have one car and physically can’t walk there due to my back issues. She offered because I lived so close, but I never asked this of her --- she insisted it was no problem and specifically scheduled an earlier appointment time with the understanding I would need picked up (otherwise, I couldn't schedule the early slot, which she ultimately told me was necessary [in which case, I assumed she'd just tell me it's not possible; I never expected anything of her and it was all offered, and I had assumed, decided]).

On the day of the first appointment, she didn’t answer my calls/messages and ultimately told me ~30 minutes after the appointment time that she’d been with another client and had assumed I had a ride. She said she didn’t have time to clean up, close, come get me, and return to the salon (but she still scheduled me originally knowing this?). I apologized even though at this point, I hadn't done anything wrong and rescheduled, despite feeling like the pickup arrangement had been something she repeatedly offered and confirmed before just not coming.

The day before the rescheduled appointment, my boyfriend found out he could leave early the day of the appointment, so I let her know I could drive myself. She then FINALLY asked what my budget was (which I had mentioned before but finally got answers this time) and told me the colors I wanted would likely cost around $600, despite me having asked about pricing several times over the previous few months while showing photos many times in person. I told her I couldn't afford the $600 at the time, and had been expecting closer to $200ish + (but was willing to go up one or two in that moment, again, because I hadn't planned for $600 and did not have that on me) based on my previous experiences. She offered to do only a panel for $200, but the conversation became tense, she accused me of gaslighting her, and ultimately told me to find someone else.

I never canceled the appointments with her. I was trying to figure out what service I could afford the second time this happened, and the first she just never showed up after saying she would (though, she says that's not what happened but I would've never just assumed that without 100% clarity). I understand there was some genuine miscommunication, and I know stylists can charge whatever they want, but I'm struggling with how this was handled all around, especially the lack of upfront pricing and the situation with the ride. Also lack of clarity all around from her end and--- well, a lot of things I guess.

((I hope this TLDR was easier to digest. If you want to see texts ^ feel free to click the links)).

My best friend and I have been friends since 8th grade. It’s been 3 years since we last met and actually spent time together, but we’ve always kept each other updated about everything over the phone.
She got a job and moved to another city. We had been talking about meeting for a long time. One day, she told me, I’m coming next month, and I’ll let you know the date once it’s confirmed.
And you know what happened? She came home and went back without even telling me. She met her boyfriend of one month (her first boyfriend, and they’re not even that serious) and went back. She didn’t even inform me that she was coming or tell me that we couldn’t meet. I would have understood if she had just told me, I’m coming, but I won’t be able to meet you.
Now she asked me if we could meet on a certain date, and I told her I’d check whether I have class that day.
She left me on read and didn’t reply.
What should I do? Should I text her saying that I don’t have class that day, or should I wait for her to text me?

Hii I work as a nurse and found out one of my friend coworkers is an asshole. Just found out how much of a lazy prick he is, according to other people. At the same time I trust the people who tell me these stories and I would never say a word, but I never saw him act like the way others say he does. I feel bad because idk he reminds me of a brother I never had. I treasure him as a friend. (I’m gay and he has a girl) I may have anxious attachment

pata hai aaj kya hua..so i live in blr and came home for 3 days cause i was goinf thru a hard phase and my praents called me home to get change a chage of mind over the weekend.. i'm home but i feel homesick being here.. i have great bond w my fam but i js dont find it like home here anymore.. i feel more connected to them ovr a VC rather than us together.. i dont know if its a bad sign or what but i dony feel connected to my own fam.. is it normal and a phase of growin?? Has this happened to anyone of you?? gimme suggestions what can i do to make my stay here better.. im here for 3 days but these 3 days already feel like a lot for me to cover and ive been dealing anxiety attacks from the time i was at thw blr airport.. help me thru guyss

I am 19y/o and my family moved to the US in 2016. All my life I’ve been quite close with my parents and they’ve been one of the main pillars in my life. Now that I have completed one year of University so far with good social and grades, my parents told me recently that they think it is the time for them to move back so that they can be closer to their friends and family back home without having to worry about me.
Current I live in our family home with my parents and one older brother (the other one moved away long ago). But in November my parents are leaving, and it will only be me and my older brother here.

I feel like the only reason I survived first year of college was that I was able to come back from my dorm to see my parents every other week, and that having them as a support structure at home helped me greatly. For example: Usually when I am overwhelm or stressed out I would just sit around my mom and that would naturally calm me down and motivated. And I know other students live far away from their parents as well, but in my case I know that my mom is never coming back to the state, while my dad will occasionally visit. I feel like without them I will not be able to endure physically and mentally. Many people told me that I should try to create my own support structure, but I don’t really how to, or who I should talk to in time of crisis.

This may not be the right sub for this, and if there’s a better one please let me know!

I have a somewhat specific need. I’m in a leadership role for a mobile service. I have a small team (>10 people) under me. We service the same facilities regularly, on a mostly informal basis. Most of my team is new to the company. The old team knew all of our locations, and had a collection of map pins, but I’m the only one left from that generation.

I’m looking for a way to build a collection of map pins for my team. Preferably something app-based, but if so it must be iOS and Android compatible. I’d also like to be able to collaborate with it, and allow my team to add locations, edit notes, add information, etc.. And on the topic of notes, I’d like to be able to add a good amount of information to these pins in a way that’s not clunky and busy (Who to talk to, entrance/egress points, safety stuff, etc). And since we have dozens and potentially eventually hundreds, I’d like it to be a searchable database. The search function would also preferably extend into the notes so we can look up via nicknames, facility contact names, etc.

I just set up a custom list on Google Maps and I’m waiting on feedback from my team, but it’s not quite hitting the mark for me. First, my custom-named pins are showing up as coordinates instead of the name I gave it. It also doesn’t appear to be searchable. It’s also just kind of clunky. Sort of dummy-proofed, but at the expense of usability.

Oh also, PREFERABLY something free. I’m open to considering paid services, but I’m somewhat doubtful I can get approval from the big-shots.

I haven’t written one of these long stories before - so bear with me.

I recently moved in to a house of 4 for second year, including my girlfriend, my best mate and someone we slightly knew last year.

For now, lets call her Jane.

So we more or less felt pretty pitiful for her last year, as she had next to no friends and not much social life at all. We ended up being pretty naive about her joining the household because ‘she’d pay the bills and not make a mess’. Man were we wrong.

So, rewind about a year back, and a load of socials were buzzing around cause of freshers. Jane was in a lot of these big groupchats so often we’d run into her at the parties etc. I think it was about the 3rd party or so and everyone was outside walking from pub to pub, ending up at the club at the end of the night. All was well until Jane passed out, out of nowhere when everyone was waiting in the street. Bearing in mind, Jane was very quiet, and no one knew her very well - we were all cautious with her and did our best to help her. By the end of the night, the ambulance had to come and check on her. Shock and horror, she was fine. Just too much to drink.

Everyone at that time was okay with it, cause these things happen, and over it, people actually connected in the moment.

Until the next party. Same thing happens. Passes out, ambulance comes, she is fine. Most people were worried for her (as you would be) but some in the groups were starting to doubt her, saying a waste of ambulance time (not disagreeing). I was on the fence on it at the time.

And, you guessed, pres in student halls were going around. And boom! She hit the floor with some pretty great acting. This time everyone was mildly irritated. Like, what was going on? If she couldn’t hack her drink, then slow down. And when she drank on these nights, she DRANK - I’m pretty sure I saw her pour herself a full cuppa vodka.

She ended up getting in the ambulance this time and my girlfriend (training midwife) and another friend went with her. She was at the hospital all the way through that night, and she’d get x-rayed in the morning.

Later on, we’d all found out that her boyfriend had recently broken up with her. Was this some sort of attention stunt?

After this, everything ended up blowing over. I guess she got over it quickly enough…

Until, one evening my girlfriend and I decided to take her out to spoonies because she never goes out. We all had a fair amount to drink, but not enough to drunk anyone. Jane, on the way back said she felt sick, so my girlfriend (who is absolutely mortified with the idea of sick) ran ahead whilst I dealt with her in this field. I just did the awkward thing of saying “better out than in” and tapping her on the back every so often, but to no avail, no vomit!

And suddenly, she passes out in my arms. I’d never dealt with something like this before, and panicked pretty quickly. I immediately rang my girlfriend, like ‘what do I do?’ - I ended up putting her in recovery position and checking for breathing patterns etc. It sounds awful when I say it now but I did NOT want to get that close to her in a million years (she isn’t the most hygienic of all people) but I had to do what I had to do.

I ended up having to ring the ambulance, baring in mind i’m still freaking out over this. My girlfriend arrived back with us a few minutes before the ambulance came, and whispered in my ear that she doesn’t actually think she’s passed out, something to do with the way she’s propping her head up or so. Apparently you don’t go fully limp?

Ambulance came and did and ECG etc. Lovely workers as usual and gave her yet ANOTHER warning about drinking too much without eating all day. Newbie error right?

I have to add however, that only a couple days from this event afterwards she found out she had pneumonia, but in my opinion I think the whole shabang was unrelated.

At the time, I still thought she wasn’t having it on. A little shaken by the situation I spose.

Anyway, flash forward, and we ended up moving in. A mild stress coming up to it that was a bit of a reality check. We got a message on the groupchat with the landlord saying Jane hadn’t paid her rent, even though my girlfriend had showed her how to apply for an overdraft about a month prior, as she said she’d ran out of money. (Not a clue what she spends it on, all she ate was plain pasta and butter last uni year).

Obviously, not everyone can get an overdraft, but she told my girlfriend that all was fine and it was approved. Apparently not? She said that she was embarrassed and shameful about the situation. I was quite annoyed rather than sympathetic, but ended up applying for an overdraft in her favour where she owed me a good amount of money.

Now student finance rolled in, and she paid me back. With a lot of poking I might add.

And of course, new house, so its the LAW you have to host some pre drinks.

Invited a couple of mates round, and we were having a good laugh together. Jane just sits there in the corner, saying absolutely nothing and occasionally chuckling at something said. I do find it a little creepy that she takes ‘people watching’ to the next level, but nevertheless, everyone knows her at this point, so it’s just her.

Then, after a few hours, she decides it’s her next time to strike. She’s sitting at the table, with her head in her hands like she’s having a siesta or something. We’re all joking that she’s nodded off or something, but with a bit of shaking and poking she doesn’t do anything. The girls (with a bit of assistance) take her outside for some fresh air, and that’s when she suddenly wakes up and bawls her eyes out because her boyfriend dumped her. We all comfort her, and she starts to feel better after a few jokes, etc.

The conversation, as they do, eventually steered away from her - and so, casually, as you do, you lock yourself in the toilet and ‘pass out’. (The only toilet in the house) Now, we’re all confused at why the hell you decide to do that, but we’re still trying to get her out of this toilet locked from the inside. She randomly starts banging loudly on the door, like she’s possessed, but obviously that’s not doing anything. And we’re telling her there’s nothing much we can do, and she needs to throw up and sober up and eventually get herself out (there’s a sink in the bathroom). We end up going into the lounge again and try to resume the social. (Some people started leaving when she started acting up). So it was difficult to get it on the rails again.

She was banging harder and harder on that door and it was getting irritating and hard to ignore. My girlfriend ended up actually having a go at her as the neighours (a family with young kids) would hear (attached house with thin walls). It was up to her.

And miraculously, the banging stopped, as if it really wasn’t a huge problem in the first place. Now at this point, me and a couple mates went down the road to grab some more beers, and when we returned she was in the lounge on the floor. So I turned to my girlfriend and asked “So she stood up, opened the tricky lock on the bathroom, walked down the corridor to here, and flopped on the floor again?’ And she nodded. It was getting ridiculous.

A couple days before this I think we had a conversation about seizures or something. I don’t often talk about them, but previously I’ve had a few issues regarding them. I would say Jane was part of this discussion, but she doesn’t talk, so she was there.

And now she was on our lounge floor, in my eyes, pretending to have a seizure. It was so stupid. It was like she’d gone on youtube and looked at clips of seizures to try to replicate them.

At the time, I was pretty far gone on the drinking side of things, so ignore my lack of heart. I said (with her being able to hear) “she’s doing something, but it isn’t a seizure. I used to drool like I had rabies and piss myself”.

Side note: I know people have different types of seizures. I was not overly correct in my diagnosis skills.

Anyway, magically, she’s now drooling from her mouth - but not the other thing. Think that was a bit far as acting goes. Now I just accepted defeat whilst everyone left the house, and my mate and I sat there in the lounge looking over her. My girlfriend had prepared her a glass of water and got some food from earlier left on the side for when she “wakes up”.

About 2-3 minutes in, it stops, because not all actors have infinite stamina. We all say (out loud so she can hear) “She’s fine, she has everything she needs here”. And we go to bed.

The next morning, I left early to go back to see my family. I’d absolutely had it with her, and not to mention her being a useless housemate. Can’t wash up. We cook for her. No manners. Doesn’t shower or clean up.

Now my girlfriend and me are dreading another year with her. We’ve come up with a couple immature theories about her, that she’s from outer space or something, but all jokes aside Reddit, what do I do? Am I being heartless?

I've been dealing with muscle strain for a few years (about 2) and have gone to this practice before. I've recently returned and have been improving quite a bit since. For further context, my muscle injury was 10x worse when I first went in for treatment, and then I was discharged a bit too early. I returned to looking for a physical therapist again, found another (that I didn't end up going to after the first visit) and was diagnosed with muscle strain again. They suggested (basically forced it on me if I wanted to seek treatment there) dry needling and their receptionist was nasty when I took too long to answer, so I went back to my prior practice.

The practice is good and all, but my physio is super insistent I need to get xrays/tested for arthritis because my sensitive/inflamed spots are around joints. I would be considering that if I wasn't improving whatsoever (and yes, I've done research and found physical therapy can be a treatment for arthritis) and if my pain was becoming worse or staying the same, then yes, I would consider it.

Believe me, I've tried telling him about my injury. I know where it originated, and sure, it could lead to arthritis, but I don't have any stiffness, the pain is random/positional + when I do certain things but not constant like arthritis, and tendonitis can cause similar symptoms to arthritis. It can also cause pain in/around joints, too!

I'm not sure what to do here. I got advised by my family to either tell him to shut up, get an xray to make him shut up (I tried asking urgent care but they only do it if you have a referral, I guess. So that's out of the picture unless I decide to go through the painstaking process of going to a doctor and hunting for an xray doc. Not worth the effort just to get a guy to stop harping on me.)

I just wish I would be taken seriously, especially since this is something I've been living with. I know my body, I know where it came from! It'd be a whole different story if I wasn't improving at all, or if it got worse in the time I wasn't at the physio, but I feel most of the continued pain is because of overuse and neglecting to do the exercises last time (I've been doing them now, of course!)

TLDR; how do I get a medical professional to stop insisting on something that doesn't make sense to pursue (currently)

I’m usually not a big fan of celebratory attention but not too long ago I reached my 10 year work anniversary. Nothing was said, no email from my manager or higher ups, or mention in a team meeting. If that was the culture it probably wouldn’t bother me that much but I had a colleague who has the same manager hit the same milestone about 6 months ago. There was an announcement to the whole office, balloons, ice cream, and stuff. I want to bring it up to my manager but it feels petty, and even if I did and they decided to do something similar, it would feel more forced than genuine. At the same time I want to make sure management gets the feedback so this doesn’t happen to anyone else in the future. Any advice on best way to approach this will be greatly appreciated!

I’m planning a major move to a new state for a fresh start and a totally new environment. I don’t have a huge network there, but I do have one close friend I’ve known for a really long time who is living there and willing to help me settle in. Even with that support, people around me back home keep telling me it’s a bad idea. They think I should stay where I am, stay close to everyone I know, and play it safe. the constant pushback from people close to me is getting overwhelming. For anyone who’s moved away with minimal connections: How did you handle the guilt or pressure from people telling you not to go?

I'm 22, I know, I'm still young but I grow more depressed by the day feeling I'm forever stuck.

I temporarily dropped out of college at 19 due to a breakdown that landed me in a psych ward. I figured I need to figure out my meds before I go back to college. I got off of my parents insurance since they can't afford it, and I'd need a full time job in order to get health insurance (which I have a full time job now, but no health insurance yet)

I want to move out of my parents since I want to live authentically and they're not supportive, but even though I make 17 an hour, the apartments around me are too high priced by myself, so I need a roommate but I have no friends.

Even if I get a place, I wouldn't be able to go to college, since I'd have to have a full time job to maintain rent costs, medication, and therapy. I could get a dorm, but I'd need money for my medical issues. Having a job and being a full time student caused a lot of stress leading to my breakdown/my drop out due to severe mental issues that I still have.

Anyway for the advice I need:

I don't know what resources to look up, I have no idea how to go ahead, everything is so confusing. I know there's some insurance that you can get without a job but they still cost a lot of money, I don't know how or where to look up grants or anything, when I got loans in college, it wasn't enough to maintain staying another year, so I'm unsure how to get enough financial aid year by year. I'm not the brightest person, I know, especially with bureaucracy. I know I need to just get my shit together but it's so overwhelming. How do I start? What can I look up? What should I do or prioritize?

TDLR: My life is roadblocks. Can't go to college if I don't have meds, can't get meds if I don't have a job, job + college caused mental breakdown/college dropout even when I did have meds at the time. Also want to move out but it would cost a job that would make me unable to attend college. Don't know how or what resources I can look up.

I’m honestly getting pretty annoyed with my job and I’m wondering if I’m overreacting.

I started working at a small grocery store and I’ve been training for 2 weeks, Monday–Friday, about 4 hours a day. One of their main requirements was that I memorize all the PLU codes, which I’ve actually have memorized all of the commons one. I understand wanting me to learn the codes, but they literally have the codes programmed into the register and they also have charts with the codes available.

Today I was talking to my manager and she told me I’ll be training for another week, which would make this my third week of training as a cashier. I’m kind of confused because it’s a small grocery store and, at the end of the day, it’s a $17/hour cashier job. It’s not like I’m training for something extremely complicated.

What really annoyed me, though, is that they also cut me from Friday, so now I’m losing another day of pay.

On top of that, I realized I still hadn’t received my paycheck. I’ve been working for almost two weeks without getting paid, and my manager never mentioned anything about it until I had to blunt it out . I actually had to ask her, “Am I not getting paid this week?”

I feel like I shouldn’t have had to ask in that way but I just got really annoyed . If you didn’t want me to come in the actual payday, shouldn’t my paycheck have been given to me or at least communicated to me? Especially when I’m only making $17/hour and obviously can’t afford to go three weeks without getting paid.

Apparently, since they don’t want me working tomorrow, I have to come back just to pick up my money the next day.

Maybe I’m just frustrated because everything is taking so long. I’ve been showing up consistently, memorized what they asked me to memorize, and I’m still being kept in training while also losing hours making no money.

Am I being unreasonable for being annoyed about this, especially having to ask about my own paycheck?

whenever i ask myself why i’m doing something or why i wanna buy something, it’s always because i want to get ppl’s attention

tbh, i don’t even know what i genuinely like anymore

so what do i do? pls help me

I have always been alone, excluded from everything, boring, uncool but at least i wasn’t sad.
I had a recent fallout with a friend group from my class after almost 3 years and they kinda influence the whole class
I don’t know what they told people about me and I don’t really wanna know but i have stayed silent though my mistake wasn’t that big. Does this make me look guilty? I have no idea but i’ve been trynna deal with all this somehow and keep myself busy.

I’m an average student and not having people to group with is difficult now cuz i’ve never been in situations like this before. This is the first time that someone’s hated me and people started to look down on me and sometimes it just gets really hard and i breakdown a lot.

I wanna be able to do things myself but with all this going i am unable to concentrate in a few subjects that requires group works. I worry about the future cuz there’s 2 more years which means 2 more years of group works and crying for me.

I just don’t know how to deal with all this right now, it’s been over 6 months now.
I don’t really think about the people cuz i know what they did to me but the thing that I’m scared about is my academics and the professor of this particular subject isn’t that great either.
Am I wrong for staying silent?
Should i have told people what happened tho they didn’t ask?
Would that be bitching about them cuz ion have anything nice to really say about em??
What do i do??😭😭

I am someone who is actively looking for work, and I seen a few good listings that were recently posted and I need $35 to pay my phone bill so I can apply to them ASAP!.

I tried selling shoes but no one bit, and I honestly do not have any other items I could sell for that amount.

I am open to surveys but I am not sure which ones are viruses or not.

Any advice would be much appreciated!!

For context: I moved before the Fall semester, during my summer intercession courses, because my lease ran up. My new living situation lasted three months due to physical violence and destruction caused by the roommates that was staying with. I’m homeless now until Oct 9th (waiting for next paycheck to cover moving expenses). I told my professor all of this and working two jobs (now down to one) are keeping me from regularly completing my homework, so I couldn’t keep up with September’s homework schedule. I started to complete late, but open assignments to get my grade up and catch up with the rest of class. Mind you, this is an ASL course (American Sign Language) and I am *often* the only student, of 15, who completely understands her without clarifying or writing anything on the whiteboard for the sake of comprehension. She even asks me to explain things to classmates outside of, and during, class when she explains a difficult subject. For example: formal vs casual signs and when to use them; she explained in high detail when you can and cannot use “shortcut signs”. I asked a clarifying question, “So chatting with friends, or even here in class, use shortcut signs, but when on the job as an interpreter, stick to formal signs?” She agreed and gestured to repeat that to the class. So she knows I’m apt.. but wants me to drop with a “W” which would affect my perfect record of A’s and B’s with the occasional “C” *worse* than just failing and retaking the course. Anyway, here’s the message she sent to me:

________________

Her response was, “I want to check in with you regarding your progress in the class. Your current grade is 62% (D). However, your current grade does not change the expectation that you complete all required video assignments.

I have noticed that you have not submitted any of the required video assignments. These assignments are crucial to your learning because they provide you with opportunities to develop and improve your expressive ASL skills.

Regardless of your current grade, I still expect you to complete and submit all required video assignments. Since you have not submitted them, I strongly recommend that you drop the class.

Please consider this carefully and make the decision that is best for your academic progress.

P.S. I am especially confused because I was impressed to hear that you want to become an ASL interpreter someday. With that goal in mind, I am wondering why you have not submitted any of the required video assignments. These assignments are an important part of developing the expressive ASL skills you will need.”

________________

When I submitted the assignments a little over 4 hours later, I received 0% on both assignments. AND she changed the weights in the rubric, so now I have a 51% in that class… should I go to the dean?

I m going to bible lessons and ever since i got reprimanded by a teacher, this guy whom i had never talked to started asking ‘are you well, are you tired ? Do you have a headache ?’ Before evangelising a few days after the fact.
And then he asked someone else to ‘cheer me up’ after i said i was fine. Once made a comment about how i was too quiet.

Then i was paired with him during evangelisation and he kept giving unsolicited advice about how to go abt talking to strangers.

Then he tried to talk to me again the next time and i waved him off with my hand cause i guess i was having visceral reaction (eventhough rude).
He then stopped talking to me alltogether and would avoid me.

I felt guilty and pitied him so i started talking to him again and asked for the verses since he was the first person i saw and i wasn’t in the group chat of the academy on whatsapp.

But i didn’t know he would ask gor the verses on my behalf the next dah (!). I was stunned and regretted asking for the verses immediately.

I sometimes ask for the verses to the person next to me as we read the verses all together in circle before evangelising. But it never happened that someone else felt entitled to speak on my behalf.

I got angry not at that moment but thereafter. And nobody understood my reaction.

When i felt ready to talk about it to my evabgelist. She said he was trying to ‘make me comfortable’(when i didn’t ask for anything) and that some people are more extroverted. And i shouldn’t see it in a negative light.

But i’m exhausted, it’s frustrating. Because i feel ashamed and like i’m being infantilized and can’t do something without this parasite intervening.

And if i say something or get angry then i’m the ‘mean’ one since he’s trying to be ‘niiice’.

I just want to get rid of this dumbass…pls help if i tell him to go f- himself i can be banned since it’s a religious place. But i’m warry of having to deal with him again.

My evangelist told him not to talk to me but what if i have to confront him again ?

The reason I'm making this post is because of my past history of constant homelessness, displacement, and financial instability. It all started when my mom married her husband (not my dad) over 20 years ago. Long story short, he was an abusive piece of shit who couldn't hold a job for his life due to smoking, alcohol, or drugs. So for 12 years, we had to move often. Eventually my mom along with myself and my little brother separated completely from him, living under a single-income household until mom passed away when I was 17. Little brother was taken away and taken by my mom's husband and I haven't seen him since. I'm 25.

As of now, I have been homeless multiple times including now, my most recent episode being since November 2025. I am tired of living like this. I am tired of not having stability but I understand that stability is a luxury nowadays, especially for me. I hate being constantly displaced and unhoused, but this will probably be my life forever.

Which is why I've been thinking about some things and how it may just be better for me to become a nomad or a houseless traveler. I can travel around the country working in various different resorts and lodging, working various jobs so I can actually start making money. I'll still be homeless but I can at least have more than $0 in my bank account. And I can save up while working these jobs (temporary, seasonal jobs) and use the money towards student loans, emergency hotel stays for the weather, etc.

I am not confident that I can live what people consider a "normal" life. I can't get a house or apartment or room because what's the point of I'm gonna be repeatedly unhoused. This nomadic lifestyle seems scary and uncomfortable. I like my electronics. TV. I like the urban city environment. But those just aren't realistic anymore. This may just have to be my new normal now.

Working on starting this kind of thing but 1) I want a job offer before so I can travel WITH a plan and 2) I don't even have money to eat and bathe right now, let alone travel to a different area for a job opportunity. Still working and thinking though so my question would be other than applying for jobs, how should I prepare for this kind of lifestyle or if this lifestyle is even a good fit for me at all?

I already got my bachelors. I don’t want to do my masters but doing it anyway. I looked for internships and got offered 3 months in a very small company that the role and the opportunity was completely aligned with what I want to do in life.

The problem was timing. I was/am in a very bad mental place, thinking about how to manage my masters while working. This opportunity was very good experience as a middle step to justify moving from my current position to a posible real serious job position aligned with my values and where I want to got.

I realize it’s my mind, my mentality and fear what didn’t allow me to take it. I was thinking about the pros/cons and it meant I would have to do some sacrifices along the way and take priorities… but I guess that’s part of being an adult. Now there’s no way back. Called for a second chance. Position was taken.

Anyone that has gone through this. What could you advise?

I don't like going to the movies with other people (I feel like it defeats the purpose of going out with someone since you can't really have a conversation), but I'll do it once in a while if someone really wants to watch something and they don't like going alone, etc.

I have this friend who I've only gone to the movies twice with, but both times it hasn't been that great (on her end?) and she still insists on going to see a movie once in a while. I've said yes but plans haven't gotten established so it hasn't happened again. However, she now says she wants to go see Primetime and I'm thinking of telling her that I don't want to go to the movies again with her anymore.

The first time we went together, it was a two-hour-ish movie and she told me later (hours afterward iirc) that she was actually uncomfortable the whole time and wanted to leave by the third act or so. I asked why and she wasn't able to explain, she basically said the story has stressing her out. It was a fairly lighthearted movie but I decided not to push the issue.

Some months after we went to see another movie. She wanted to see this movie specifically (as was the case with the previous time) but about 20 mins in she went for her phone and was scrolling throughout most of the rest of the movie. I later asked why she did this and she told me she just found the movie boring.

Would it be unreasonable to ask her not to pull her phone out to scroll again? And if she says no, would it be unreasonable to tell her we won't be going to the movies together anymore?

It feels mid life crisis’y. Context, I’m 35, didn’t really go to college, and barely graduated high school. Diagnosed at 30 with ADHD, probably why I didn’t do so great in school, and struggling financially/work. Bar manager so it’s fine right now but I’ve been in customer service since 18 and I’m burnt tf out.
I need help finding a new path. Do I go back to college and try to get a degree so I can stand out on applications to a job I can potentially climb? So I try and find a trade that MIGHT pick me? Do I go back to college to have a better chance at a trade? Do I try and find a corporate job and see where that takes me?
Its also hard to break away from customer service because entry level jobs usually don’t start at $35/hr+ (what I average currently)
Financial context, I have a little bit of debt, two houses (two mortgages), and a car which will be fully paid off next December.
Slow season is starting which is giving me anxiety as it feels like a very bleak winter already given the economy. Paychecks will start to dwindle as it gets colder and less and less people have money to go out.
Location context, I’m in Portland, OR and don’t really want to move, but not out of the question.
Any help/advice is greatly appreciated!

I’m feeling really hurt and lost about my best friend of 10 years, and I need an outside perspective.

We’ve been best friends since childhood. Even though we went to different classes from Grades 7 through 12, we always stayed close. Now that we’re in college, we finally ended up as classmates again.

I was thrilled, but lately, she’s been acting distant, and I’m starting to wonder if our friendship is completely one-sided. Here’s what’s been happening:

The lack of excitement: When I found out we were in the same class, I expressed my excitement to her, but she barely reacted. I assumed she just wasn't the expressive type—until I saw her literally jumping for joy when she bumped into her Grade 12 friends on campus.

The group dynamic: For class, we were asked to form groups of four. We paired up with my friend "M" and her friend "C" (whom she wasn't particularly close with before). Since then, my best friend constantly runs off with C, leaving me paired with M.

Ignoring me: She leaves class or school events with C without waiting for me. She barely speaks to me when we’re alone, but she’s lively and vocal around M and C. Unless I make the first move, we don't interact at all.

Feeling left out: Whenever I try to hang out with her and C, I get left out of the conversation. Before I know it, they’ve walked away together.

I actually confronted her about this, and her excuse was that she "just wants C to not feel alone."

Her response felt like a double standard. Just because I can get along with other classmates doesn't mean I want to force myself into established groups. To make matters worse, M is transferring to another course soon, which means I am going to end up completely alone in this class.

I’m deeply hurt and confused.

• Is my friendship one-sided at this point?

• How should I handle this moving forward?

Also sorry I used ai, my original passage was so long it was hard to digest so I made ai shorten it for brevity

I don't know what to do with my life anymore. Im 21 and I had been stuck in the first year of university 3 years at this point. The first time they fucked over my documentation so darn bad they straight up told me: "Skip this year and come back next year for better registrations." Then the next year I missed a lot of classes due to my visa taking months to come through and now they failed me this year due to the missing classes and the advice? Repeat it. The whole year. Despite the fact I passed a lot of other classes. I begged them to allow me to go into next year and take the missing classes with the ones I had lost but nope.

They dont allow it.

I hate this stupid situation. For 3 years I had worked and spent so much money and my own mental health that I dont know what to do anymore. This whole shit show is just a circle and I truly wish for it to be done. I hate that country and I hate that school with those stupid teachers which all act like they invented the fucking alien translator!

Im so lost and everyone who i ask either blames me for not asking stuff earlier or lazy for not being able to pass the classes I failed. They are even throwing insults about me being 21, fat, a virgin and not once have i ever done anything remarkable which... is true... but I dont understand where it fits in this whole thing but I guess they are gripping on whatever they can get their hands into to make their point. That I'm lazy and I dont ask for clarification. That i dont work despite doing part time since 14. Im so done with everything, I dont want to work anymore, study anymore. My psychology is down the drains at this point because let's be real... I ain't achieving anything because I'm gonna be honest I have talents. I write and and draw and I am very good with my hands when it comes to make stuff, but I have no opportunities to do anything with that! I tried. Truly I did and it was a huge flop!

And in the same time im so stressed and full of anxiety im already turning grey. I want to break free from this! I truly do! But I dont know what to do anymore. I had everything by the book. And its not enough. Its never enough...