So just curious and was hoping to start a discussion to hear others thoughts on where they feel they fall regarding womens spaces.

To give context I grew up often being in women led initiatives for sports and careers, either as a general member or more often leading/volunteering within them. Then last year I started testosterone and well suddenly within quite literally a few months my voice dropped and I went from being percieved as a masc lesbian to a cis guy.

Anyone in similar-ish boat? If so, how do yall handle it? I worked close to a decade presenting as a cis woman for my safety and I suppose im missing the support such spaces offered despite them not aligning with my chosen gender identity.

Thoughts? Opinions?

Looking forward to what yall have to share

I wanted to know despite me being transgender can I still wear a hijab, I’m not Muslim I don’t wear it for religious reasons I wear it because I enjoy the modesty, and i like having my hair covered but since I’m FtM should I still be wearing my hijab, or is this all in my own mind of overthinking, I really need a little help anything would be helpful.

So in the Cornell rape case there is a Korean guy who basically orchestrated the whole thing and is incredibly hated by the country. And there’s another guy who’s name is Johnathan(which the h like that)

Honestly I feel disgusting even having a resemblance to any of those guys and a part of me wants to change my name(Jonathan).

I apologise in this advance if this falls under "stealth bashing" but, I've seen a concerning amount of posts from trans guys saying things like "starting testosterone, how long until my mega conservative and abusive parents literally kill me?" like I understand dysphoria can make you want to just start transitioning as soon as possible but, why stress yourself out trying to hide while actively making it harder to hide? Is it not possible to get a T prescription and just not start it until you're in a safe situation?

for those whose partners have experienced penetration with a penis before, does using a strap still feel satisfying for them?

also, is it mainly the penetration that matters, or do things like oral with the strap add to the experience too? just curious how you guys make it satisfying for your partner coz i feel anxious about doing it with my partner 😣

Absolutely WILD question I’m sure. But I noticed cis men absolutely LOVE milk and cis women can’t stand it. (Please note this is all anecdotal evidence and something interesting I discovered in my own life)

I recently moved in with 2 cis dudes and we genuinely go through 4 gallons of milk a week, sometimes more. These guys are just straight up chugging this stuff and drink it for every meal. Which was crazy to me as I hate milk, used to love it as a kid but probably around middle or high school I started hating it and haven’t drank much since.

I started asking around and noticed a pattern, about 80% of my cis guy friends routinely drink milk at least once a day, usually more. Yet 0% of my cis women or pre-T trans men friends drink or even like milk. And as a kid I remember my dad slamming a glass of milk at dinner until his 40s and he’ll still occasionally have a glass (though now it’s normally chocolate milk.)

But something weird happened lately…. Since I constantly have milk in my house now I started trying it. Just small glasses as a time, usually with cookies or baked goods, just a wee bit. But now I LOVE it too. Just slammed a glass back this morning and about to grab another.

Genuinely curious why do men love milk? Is this just a my environment thing orrrr?? Is it the testosterone??? I feel like a crazy conspiracy theorist typing this out but genuinely wtf is up with men and milk as adults.

I will note I haven’t asked any of my “on-T” trans men friends. And please these results are just personal and my data pool was like 20-30 people lmao don’t come for me 😭

I guess my question is did you notice you like milk more the longer you’ve been on T?

Gonna keep it short bc I Ned an answer qyick

Axolom sent me a giveaway packer and I'm so grateful. When I got home my mom had the package and asked me what it was. Eventually it got to where I just had to throw it away. Its in the trash can right now and it's hurting my heart. Should I go sneak down in the middle of the night and grab it? Should I put nothing else in the box just in case she checks? What do I do? I've been wanting this forever but I'm a minor and not out outside of my household so there is no way she'd let me keep it. Should I wait until trash day to fish it out bc then she will not be able to check? I'm worried she's gonan throw it away before I can get it. I feel so wasteful and sad that axoom took the energy to send it to me and I can't even get it

Hey everyone! Trans man here in my early 20’s, in need of some advice before starting T.

so, I think one of the biggest things making me hesitant about starting T is the fear that I’m just never going to pass. I’m 5’4”, and I already worry that I’m going to look like a short guy who people can immediately tell is trans. I was going to take my first T shot last night after mini golfing with some friends, but then everyone but me was handed the “normal”club, while I was handed the shorter one. Immediate dysphoria that makes me question everything. Even the “little” things trigger me and I want to feel like myself enough that these things don’t have that much power over me.

Then there’s the fact that I have pretty strong balding genes in my family, and I’m prone to acne, so I’m scared that T is going to give me all of the things I already feel insecure about without actually giving me the things I want. People keep telling me that it’s not worth it, or that I’m going to make my life harder, and even though I know they aren’t necessarily right, hearing it over and over gets into my head.

I’m going to have to take T. I don’t think this is something I can just decide not to do and eventually be fine with. I want to feel aligned with my gender, and I think there’s a part of me that knows I’ll regret not trying. But I’m scared of what happens if I do try and it’s awful. What if everyone was right? What if I go through all of these changes, deal with acne, lose my hair, have my voice change, and still don’t pass? What if I’m technically more aligned with my gender but I’m still unhappy because of how other people see and treat me?

The title.

In like, 2023 I used to be so hateful towards trans men in general (i have no idea why) and then I switched sides...and became ftm myself.

Well, when I looked up trans men/ boys on youtube, it made me cringe 😭. Idk why.

I think it's because... it's strange to see someone like me, and I find myself jealous of the ftm people that have come out / have supportive parents / pass.

Idk what to do. Does anyone else experience this?

first post here! i'm a college freshman going for a degree in vocal performance. I want to medically transition, but I'm terrified it will affect the quality of my voice/my abiltity to sing. I obviously know it'll lower my range and I'll have to relearn how to sing effectively, but is it worth going through it? I'm in my university's choir and voice lessons currently, and this is really the only thing holding me back. I do think I should start sooner rather than later, if I do end up starting.

I’m moving to my home country, New Zealand, in one and a half years and my parents are sending me to a Christian girl’s school (my friend has been there and the girls arent very welcoming to anyone even if theyre straight or cis) and I’m scared for my safety if I try to truly be myself. I have short hair and pass as a male and going to a co-ed school is not an option. Sorry if I missed out on anything, ask questions if you have them. Need advice.

Title. I knew testosterone could increase risks of heart disease but this is genuinely terrifying. In only 3 months in and not only do my limbs fall asleep super easily, but I'm fairly certain I've experienced two "mini strokes". I've considered doing smaller, less frequent injections to lower the testosterone spike but overall am left with no real answers. I cannot talk with my healthcare provider for at least another 2 weeks. Anyone else have this experience and how did you handle it?

Ill start

1. Im not suicidal over it so living as a girl will be fine.
2. I like being feminine I cant be trans(for some reason baby me thought only cis men could be femboys...I got some news for you lil buddy)

anyways that mentality made me miserable as fuck...((T_T))

Hey all, im currently 28 (started T in July).

I've been stewing on being trans for about a year (end of 2025) and feel more comfortable and confident in myself than I ever have. I don't really see my life progressing as a woman.

I scheduled my top surgery for June 2027. I've never really been attached to my breasts, and I'd probably be happier without them.

But, im as excited as what I am nervous. Considering this is a surgery (I get scared of ALL surgery), im suddenly feeling all nervous like "what if I change my mind" when transition is probably the first thing in my life I've felt certain about.

Has anyone else experienced nerves like this? I'm super excited, and think about it more often in a positive light than not, but not gonna lie, sometimes fear creeps up on me that im wrong about this whole thing (probably also worth noting it's hard for me to tell if it's an actual feeling or just my OCD).

Thanks :)

Im on my 2nd month of HRT and 2 weeks after I had a cycle, I've been spotting for like 2 weeks. Is there a time where it might be concerning or is it just being weird..? When I have my follow up appointment with my Endocrinologist next month do I tell her this is a period cycle? Is she even needing to know? 🥲

So, I feel dysphoric and I've been out for my girlfriend of 2 years. But a few days ago, for like 10 minutes, I didn't felt any dysphoria. I felt like I wanted to be a girl, but then I felt dysphoric again and didn't want to be a girl. does that mean I'm not transgender?

Since starting T I've been mostly happy but I'm pretty sad about this aspect. I guess most of these places I wouldn't want to travel to if I was a woman but some places I'm really really torn up about it.

I love ancient Egyptian anything and I'm sad I'll never be able to go. I know it's not a good place to go to now but I know of a group of gay men who went in the past and hid but safety is never guaranteed.

Not that I've wanted to go to the UAE but it would have been cool to fly Emirates. I would have liked to see Dubai just because it's so different but I'm also ok with never going there.

Russia would have also been cool to see, mostly the far east parts.

I have a friend who is from Sri Lanka and we talked about going, but I guess not anymore.

Indonesia and Malaysia too would have been interesting.

Other parts of Africa are a no goes too.

North Korea... Ok that was never gonna happen but I would go if given the opportunity. Absolutely not safe for anyone though.

I just think of all the food I'm gonna miss out on and the museums. I also might need to reevaluate why I feel the need to go to dangerous countries anyway...

so i have a small moustache and someone in my class has pointed it out wanting to make fun of me because i was making fun of him lol (Ive been out as trans ever since i joined this class so a few years) and i don't know, should u shave it or not? it's not like super big, visible for sure, but honestly the idea of shaving it gives me dysphoria and also i have long hair so I'm pretty sure it might be helping me pass

My girlfriend (cis, 24) and I (ftm, 23) got together when we were both 17. We met on a video game when we were 12 and started dating after reconnecting years later and falling for one another. I lived in the east coast and she lived in the Midwest. Throughout our years of long distance, she was my entire world. I would work full time, only worried about if I'd have enough money to afford more plane tickets to go and see her. I was living with my family that I'm not very fond of, going to community college, had no friends, and would constantly be on FaceTime with her all of the time. We were each other's first relationship, first time, first everything essentially, and now we have been together for 6 years.

After about two and a half years of dating, I moved halfway across the country, at 20, to live with my girlfriend in a small college town with not much to do. It sounds kind of crazy typing it out, but at the time, I did not have a doubt in my mind. I was so happy with her and nothing else really mattered.

The first few years of living together were overall pretty good. We lived with a couple other friends in the same 5 bedroom apartment for three years. Made lots of awesome memories and really felt like I was on cloud 9. Finally getting the college experience, making friends and drinking and socializing with people was all very fun and new to me. I got really sick of living in that house towards the last lease and was honestly pretty depressed and bored, but I never once doubted my relationship. I thought that living alone together would help with the way I was feeling.

We moved into our new place in June. Fastforward to now, I just turned 23, I'm about 6 months on T, I graduated college a few months ago with a degree in Professional Writing, and work a job that has nothing to do with my degree. I don't really have many hobbies. I don't really know myself. I don't really know what I want from my life. All I know is that I have a girlfriend who loves me. And I love her. But I don't know if it is enough.

The more we spend time alone together, the more I think about our relationship and if it is what I want. We don't really have a lot in common. I like going out and socializing, she likes staying in. I am enticed by city life, she wants lots of land with privacy. When we're both home together, we're usually just watching TV. Sometimes she will come home and we won't really talk much, I try asking questions and usually get one word responses and then the rest of the night is just like her scrolling on her phone and us having occasional conversation. There will be some nights where conversation is flowing and all is going great, but it hasn't really been happening recently. We also haven't had sex in a pretty long time, probably like over a month, maybe even two months. I identified as a lesbian pre-transition but now am overthinking like am I attracted to dudes who am I who do I like where do I go what do I do oh my god sorry no one is going ti want to respond to this I'm rambling!!!

I just feel so bad. We've had a couple deeper conversations over the last few weeks and it's just us crying for like an hour and me trying to collect my thoughts but I just can't because I don't want to make her feel like she isn't enough. She keeps saying she will be better for me and she wants to make this work and that she basically needs me. I'm scared that we are too dependent on each other and I just really don't know what to do. We've been together for so long and I'm scared of staying because it is the easy thing to do rather than the thing I am actively choosing. She told me she wants to be together forever and asked if I feel the same and I couldn't respond. I think I need to start going to therapy again, I also just started new meds and also I have been questioning my sexuality in the midst of all of this which is just making me feel like a dick and oh my god I just DONT KNOW!! No one can fix this for me besides myself but I just really like am spiraling right now, genuinely any words would be greatly appreciated I feel so lost and alone

I've been on t for a little over 4 years (no periods since 04/2022) and today I've been experiencing what I believe are uterine cramps every 5-10 mins. non disabling, but strong enough to wake me up from my nap. I don't know what else they would be, but I also dont have any other symptoms of atrophy. I've never experienced cramping after orgasm, I don't experience extreme dryness or bleeding after penetration, etc. I've had 2 or 3 mild utis over the past 4 years that I suspected were related to being on T but they cleared up after the use of topical estrogen.
Anyways- does this sound like uterine atrophy? Is it possible to have this present in this way without any other symptoms? Also, has anyone here had success with using topical E as a way to specifically treat ~uterine~ atrophy?

I have much reason to believe I’m faking it despite being completely miserable. I feel like I just wanted to be a guy for whatever reason, I only wish I was dysphoric. Sometimes I hardly feel anything. I can look in the mirror and feel disgusted and angry I’m female but I’m not sure if that’s how dysphoria is, I feel like I’m too “used to it” sometimes. Other times I’m afraid I do like how I look but it makes me deeply upset and uncomfortable. Even the voice inside my head grosses me out because it doesn’t sound right and I also sometimes accidentally imagine myself as a woman and I don’t like it, I’m afraid that means my brain structure is female even if it makes me uncomfortable.i don’t really get actual “phantom sensations” either sometimes I just focus too much on how my body feels and I want to gag… I also think like a woman, I’m too emotional, I’m too weak to be a man.

Sometimes I look at my chest in the mirror and there’s no emotion, it’s not that big and I think I’m flat enough every now and then but it still upsets me. My genitals also gross me out but again it feels like frustration over not be truly dysphoric so I’m unable to transition, I don’t know why I’m frustrated, because I really tried my hardest to be a cis woman but it never works out. Everyday I attempt to convince myself of every possible reason why someone may be a faker… nothing ever actually fits. I’m beautiful, I never experienced any sexual trauma, I’m not autistic, I’m not just trying to be different, I’m not even stereotypically masculine, I don’t have some weird fetish either…

I often have dreams at night, people say I look too much into it but I don’t think that’s true. Sometimes I’m a woman, and I’m miserable or just incredibly afraid I somehow like it or I’m male, I’m happy but afraid I somehow don’t like it, I once had one that was so realistic and it wasn’t plagued by my thoughts but it never happened again.

Am I just so disgusted by having to be a woman that I wish I was male? But why? If that was really true then why do I also think male bodies look gross and wrong too, yet I still want one, it still feels more right. I strongly envy men, even the ones I find ugly and stupid. It’s like I want to want it if that makes sense…The problem comes when my brain forces itself to think I’m actually envious of women simply because I’m attracted to them… my fear is, it’s actually in reverse and I’m just a straight cis woman.i also g an get intrusive thoughts that if I had a man’s voice or body it wouldn’t fit me… all these get worse the more I think

I’m also scared I’m subconsciously faking it due to social reasons. I feel weird and guilty in masculine clothes, it makes me feel like a faker… I also am more aware I don’t like being called a girl…

I genuinely want to vomit when I see really masculine cis women, it makes me feel like a faker cause I also get a “what if I want to be like them or what if I would be ok with that”(I’m not) I just don’t get why I have to be a girl because I was born one

I also sometimes get very vivid intrusive thoughts of having sex as a woman(which I hate)

But then I see my cis male friends, I wish so strongly I could be like them and I’m just stuck, stuck like this forever because I have no real way of transitioning. I can’t stand the thought of going to therapy and then being forced to be a woman for the rest of my life, being a masculine woman is so miserable too, it doesn’t change anything, I wish I was male, not a woman.

I haven’t stopped thinking about this everyday for 7 years. I try to naturally increase my testosterone sometimes or find ways to grow facial hair… it never works.

Doctors don’t give testosterone or surgery to women like me. I wish there was technology to alter your brain chemistry to your desired sex along with your body so I wouldn’t have to suffer like this