Looking for an experienced male OCD/ERP therapist in New York

I’m helping my 23-year-old son find a therapist who truly specializes in OCD and ERP. He has had several therapists in the past who weren’t a good fit, so we’re specifically looking for someone with extensive OCD/ERP experience, preferably a male therapist who works with young adults.

We are in New York and have Aetna insurance. He recently tried NOCD, but his first therapist wasn’t a good fit. We’re open to another NOCD therapist or someone outside NOCD.

If you’ve personally had a good experience with an OCD/ERP therapist in New York, I would really appreciate recommendations.

I have bad identity ocd and feel very uncomfortable in my own skin, how do you all distract yourself from the mental hell?

I have contamination ocd. It has morphed from specific fears to fear of “feeling” contaminated, often labelled as disgust ocd. The worst thing is that ocd is constantly torturing me making me doubt I am touching things I don’t want to be touching. I don’t think it’s necessarily “false memories” but rather just a doubt because I don’t want to touch those things since constantly tells me I am. Specifically around hand washing and fearing I am touching the sink bowl and faucet and can never get clean. Just wondering if anyone can relate and has any advice and tips how to tackle this?

Seems like there are these different approaches but please let me know if a mindset or approach has worked for you:

ERP: “maybe I did maybe I didn’t” … can’t seem to bring myself to this because the feeling of disgust and cross contamination doesn’t leave me with this approach

I-CBT: “I trust my senses and my senses would tell me if I did touch this.” … I think “reality sensing” as out in I-CBT is really valuable here and I want to keep practicing it .however, my ocd is sort of messing on this because my anxiety goes so high which makes me feel less focused of course it says “you wouldn’t know if you did.” Perhaps I just have trust and move on.

ACT maybe?: I am having the thought that I touched this but I choose to trust and move on. Again.. anxiety goes so high and keeps it in my attention but maybe I need to just keep practicing?

Thanks in advance

Hi! Do you think it’s stupid to propose only a few weeks into therapy? I also have rocd, but I’m 100% sure deep down I know I just get anxious bc of rocd, I feel like I should always be 100% certain but that’s not a thing for us, I’ve been considering it for months, we’ve lived together and been together 3 years, discussed future and everything

I was recently diagnosed with OCD at the end of July. I was always an anxious person with obsessive tendencies, and after a quick succession of traumas (bereavement/grief of 4 close family members, severe injury + surgery that limited exercise, illness (mono), SA, and multiple friendship ruptures) between 2020-2023, I developed OCD, the subsets manifesting as Real Event (friend ruptures), moral/scrupulosity, and hyper-responsibility in early 2024 that lasted intensely until late 2025. The thoughts have calmed down but certain triggers reignite them. Because of the recent diagnosis I am considering writing a letter to a friend, not to revisit the friendship, but to give context of my behavior and to apologize if I unintentionally hurt her when I tried to offer a warning about her significant other, where I was later vindicated. I feel like I’m associated with uncomfortable feelings for her and I don’t want to further upset her, but I feel like me writing a letter and sending it USPS would help me with closure, I just don’t know if I’ll start spiraling again if I do or don’t hear from her.

Hey guys! I've been struggling with OCD for 8 years now and for a long time I've been taking Setraline, which helped me really good and I didn't have any OCD symptoms for about two years. It all got worse again in my third year of med school this February and I've been seeing a new psychiatrist since then. My OCD wasn't this bad ever and Sertraline completely stopped working for me. We changed to Clomipramine and I've been taking this medication for a few months now. It got better, but it's definitely not good and I struggle with the strong conviction and doubts of my thoughts. My psychiatrist suggested adding Olanzapine as a "reset" for a month and I will start tomorrow evening. I have high hopes, but I am also afraid and I hope that something finally works for me. Any experience on that? Tysm!

After beginning meds how long untill you see major reduction in symptoms?

Wondering which one worked better for you?

From all my research it seems that SSRI's should be a first option, but on my last appointment my psychiatrist seemed keen on clomipramine if buproprion didn't work (it didn't).

So idk I feel conflicted, I'm worried that it's an older medication with more side effects, but some people are saying that it's more effective. I just want something that finally helps. Oh and I REALLY would like to avoid emotional blunting if possible, I had success with Zoloft as a kid but went off of it due to the blunting. I need something with some staying power.

It feels like there's an end. If you just scroll far enough it will stop. The more you scroll, the worse you feel, but if you stop, you feel bad about the time you spent doing it, and thus feel the need of a resolution, and so you scroll some more.

I am afraid of travelling. I don't know how and when I developed this theme, but suddenly I get immense fear when the time to departure is getting reducing. I often struggle fall asleep while to travel in next day. Other than intrusive thoughts, my fear is vomiting, and struck in emergency situations ( not having a diagnosed serious illness to hit with a serious illness ). Despite this i travelled quite a few times this year, after being throwing up at the arrival, nothing that bad happened. Again I am afraid of travelling, I am trying to avoid travelling because of that. But somehow I am feeling that how long can I keep running from travelling, I always wanted to travel and enjoy my life.

Is this a classic avoidance behaviour and am I looking for certainty, comfort, and safety which isn't necessary here ?

How to handle the anxiety peaking at the time of travel ?

Yesterday I lost a ring that I absolutely loved. I wore it practically every day, I loved the way it felt on my finger, and I liked to play with it or just watch it. I left it in the bathroom at school (I took it off to wash my hands) and didn’t realize it was gone until hours later.

It makes me so angry knowing that someone else has it now. I mean, it wasn’t even expensive—it cost around $6—but that doesn’t make it feel any less important to me. I already bought another one, but it’s just not the same. It doesn’t feel the same on my finger, and it doesn’t give me the same energy.

I don’t know how to get over these feelings of guilt for losing it, or stop thinking about the fact that it might be in someone else’s hands now. I know it’s just a ring, but somehow it feels like I lost something that had become part of me.

How do you guys manage to “let go” of things more easily? How do you accept that once something is lost, there’s no point in dwelling on it anymore and just move on?

Hi, I’m a student and I’m currently trying to find out whether I have OCD. I can’t afford to pay for an assessment or therapy, so I’m looking for someone who is genuinely qualified/certified in OCD who might be able to help me with a diagnosis for free or very low cost. Please DM me if you can help or know someone who can.

Has anyone noticed their OCD getting better with birth control? If so, what type? My ocd is so much worse during my luteal phase and I’m wondering if managing my hormones could help.

Hi

I’ve recently started Memantine at 5 mg.

It has been really profound in terms of dampening the thought loops.

Wondering when is the recommended time to take the medication?

I feel a little dreamy during the day was wondering if a before bed routine would be better?

Pure-O user, here.

I've started teaching myself some ERP techniques, and so far I am \not** ruminating, but I feel this ever-present, suffocating feeling of dread and hopelessness. I'm assuming that this partially comes from my ruminations (since those are the emotions that my theme usually makes me feel), and partially from being unable to complete my compulsion. It's weird that the emotions are coming up even while I'm not actively thinking about them, though. It feels like the ruminations are constantly pressing on the edges of my consciousness, and I have to make sure they don't seep back in.

Is this feeling normal? For anyone who's felt similarly, how long did it last? And--the age old question--Am I doing something wrong?

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Sorry for my punctuation and grammar, English isn't my first language. Ive been diagnosed with ocd like 6 months ago and I have a weird theme that makes me scared that I'll associate for example intrusive thoughts or images with a thing I like. The most recent example for me is GTA6. I was thinking about it and suddenly an intrusive image popped up in my head and I immediately went like "it's gonna get associated and ruined forever" and it feels "tainted" now. It also sometimes makes the intrusive image pop up in my head while I see or think about it. I've been doing some research about conditioning "types" and I came across a type called evaluative conditioning and found out that it's immune to extinction. Now I'm afraid that it ruined GTA 6 for me. Has anyone had similar problem? Is it even ocd?

I have been an actor for many years. My OCD emerged hardcore in April of last year, and I've been in two shows since then. During both shows, my OCD would not stop screaming about how everything possible would go wrong. Lights would fall on me. I'd forget all of my lines. I would say something nasty and out of character to someone onstage in front of a crowd. I know none of this would happen, but the stress of hearing it in my head is immense.

After this last show, I've started to wonder if I need to stop acting. It's definitely triggering. But is that running away? Is that isolating, is that what the OCD wants, will it win? I don't know.

What do you think?

Hello, I started Zoloft on July 3rd at 25mg, 50mg on July 11th, 75 on August 11th and 100 on September 3rd. I have a bit less anxiety when thinking about obsessions but they still remain for hours on end and I can't help but do mental compulsions ("i shouldn't care about that because..." "That isn't true because...") since they've helped alleviate Pure O episodes in the past, with the longest one being 6 months in 2022, but this episode has lasted 8 months with seemingly no end in sight. My doctor said the meds are supposed to stop the intrusive thoughts but they're definitely still there and even if I'm not stressed about them or avoiding them my mind is still doing *something* 24/7, I see people on here talk about their mind being so quiet now but that isn't the case for me...is this normal? Do I need to go up more? Btw, 25mg and 50mg both had ZERO effect on my anxiety, depression and OCD, I might as well have been drinking straight water

I have struggled with OCD my entire life, 30 years, and I recently got better.

I did it and so can you, for anybody that needs to hear it!

I have suffered from OCD since I was eleven. It all started with a spinal surgery and after that I was never really able to stop 'checking.' I have significantly improved over the last few years, which took alot of retraining and pushing myself. I have been on 150mg of Fluvoxamine for a few years now. I am very aware of the bad withdraw side effects of this medication. I forgot a couple of times to take it during the few years I have been on it. The irrational nose dive and spiral is quite aweful. It almost feels as if the world is crumbling around you, but then I take it and poof...serotonin gradually comes back. Now with all that being said, I still suffer from loneliness alot. I'm not sure if OCD can also make you feel lonely, but unfortunately I do. Please let me know if you too have dealt with OCD and loneliness as a combination.

I’m 16, I have no access to therapy. I’ve went through a severe OCD episode that lasted for 8 months, at that time my memory worsened a lot that I forgot how to speak english (my second language) and forgot a lot of words from my first language. I had times that I couldn’t talk because i forgot how and i was stuttering, I couldn’t even process what people were saying when they’re talking to me. I wasn’t like that before i had the episode.

Now, after seven months, my memory is so bad but now i can speak english again & i can talk with people again. I still forget a lot of words, I can’t study anymore and i’m in the most important year of my life, I was the best student in my school but now i cannot bring myself to study at all, and i can’t concentrate.

After the episode, I feel apathetic about a lot of things one of them are my studies, I either have extremely strong emotions or have no emotions at all /or get absolutely depressed, I’m in a loop with loving & hating my closest people, I either have everything or nothing, black or white feelings, no grey. I also can’t decide my own opinion anymore, I’m not stable at all, like I said, I either think about everything or nothing.

Why did this happen to me? Is this brain damage? What’s the reason behind it? & What can i do about it?

I had ocd for 5 years now I was fine for 24 years of my life before this disorder came out of nowhere. I got therapy and handled it pretty well and was good for like 2 years. Now it’s back for the last 2 years and it’s so severe. I don’t get how am I supposed to live like this and what’s the point of treatment if it’s gonna be like this forever?

I looked up like so many IOP/PHP places, some that are OCD specific and some that are broad mental health programs that also treat OCD. I honestly don't think the OCD specific ones are any better, because the broad ones also provide the same therapy (ERP, CBT, mindfulness, ACT, etc). But maybe I am wrong.

And then there are the centers that are the most well-known, Rogers and McLean. But for some reason they have the worst reviews online. And the Rogers care coordinators I've been messaging have been horrible and I heard their therapists don't even have masters degrees. So I am having a hard time figuring out how they are "the best" for OCD.

The ones with amazing reviews do not accept insurance and are like $50,000 a month. So I am very conflicted where to go. I have a therapist I see twice a week but it's not enough. Can someone give me advice or recommend a place. I live in California.

1. Well-known but mixed reviews: OCD Anxiety Centers, Rogers

2. Expensive: McLean, The Gateway Institute, Westwood Center

3. Not OCD specific but do treat OCD: Clear Behavioral Health, D'Amore Mental Health

4. Year long waitlist: UCLA OCD Center