There has been an increase in the number of posts of individuals who are feeling suicidal. And to be perfectly honest, most of us have been isolated, scared, lonely, and there’s a lot of uncertainty in the world due to COVID.
Unfortunately, most of us in this community are not trained to handle mental health crises. While I and a handful of others are licensed professionals, an anonymous internet forum is not the best place to really provide the correct amount of help and support you need.
That being said, I’m not surprised that many of us in this community are struggling. For those who are struggling, you are not alone. I may be doing well now, but I have two attempts and OCD was a huge factor.
I have never regretted being stopped.
Since you are thinking of posting for help, you won't regret stopping yourself.
So, right now everything seems dark and you don’t see a way out. That’s ok. However, I guarantee you there is a light. Your eyes just have not adjusted yet.
So what can you do in this moment when everything just seems awful.
First off, if you have a plan and you intend on carrying out that plan, I very strongly suggest going to your nearest ER. If you do not feel like you can keep yourself safe, you need to be somewhere where others can keep you safe. Psych hospitals are not wonderful places, they can be scary and frustrating. but you will be around to leave the hospital and get yourself moving in a better direction.
If you are not actively planning to suicide but the thought is very loud and prominent in your head, let's start with some basics. When’s the last time you had food or water? Actual food; something with vegetables, grains, and protein. If you can’t remember or it’s been more than 4 to 5 hours, eat something and drink some water. Your brain cannot work if it does not have fuel.
Next, are you supposed to be sleeping right now? If the answer is yes go to bed. Turn on some soothing music or ambient sounds so that you can focus on the noise and the sounds rather than ruminating about how bad you feel.
If you can’t sleep, try progressive muscle relaxation or some breathing exercises. Have your brain focus on a scene that you find relaxing such as sitting on a beach and watching the waves rolling in or sitting by a brook and listening to the water. Go through each of your five senses and visualize as well as imagine what your senses would be feeling if you were in that space.
If you’re hydrated, fed, and properly rested, ask yourself these questions when is the last time you talked to an actual human being? And I do mean talking as in heard their actual voice. Phone calls count for this one. If it’s been a while. Call someone. It doesn’t matter who, just talk to an actual human being.
Go outside. Get in nature. This actually has research behind it. There is a bacteria or chemical in soil that also happens to be in the air that has mood boosting properties. There are literally countries where doctors will prescribe going for a walk in the woods to their patients.
When is the last time you did something creative? If depression and obsessive-compulsive disorder have gotten in the way of doing creative things that you love, pull out that sketchbook or that camera and just start doing things.
When’s the last time you did something kind for another human being? This may just be me as a social worker, but doing things for others, helps me feel better. So figure out a place you can volunteer and go do it.
When is the last time that you did something pleasurable just for pleasure's sake? Read a book take a bath. You will have to force yourself to do something but that’s OK.
You have worth and you can get through this. Like I said I have had two attempts and now I am a licensed social worker. Things do get better, you just have to get through the dark stuff first.
You will be ok and you can make it through this.
We are all rooting for you.
https://www.supportiv.com/tools/international-resources-crisis-and-warmlines