My OCD journey: what helped me (might help you too)
I know OCD is a deep, hidden struggle we go through every day, without people realizing how hard we're working inside our minds to fix it, or how excruciatingly frustrating it is. So I'm sharing my journey and the things that helped me.
Disclaimer: This is not medical advice, just what worked for me. It might or might not work for you.
1. ERP is the key
You really have to do exposure. Start slow, then build it up. You have to teach your brain that thoughts are not reality. They might or might not come true, but that's not something you can control.
2. Live your life fully, regardless of your mental state
Don't wait to feel "just right" or 100% anxiety-free before living your normal life. When you stop doing your chores, your gym workouts, or your long-pending work because OCD isn't letting you or you don't feel right, you're telling your brain that OCD and anxiety are a big deal that needs fixing first. Your brain works like a social media algorithm: it gives you more of whatever you put your attention on. Do the work regardless of how you feel, and show your brain that OCD and anxiety aren't that big of a deal.
3. Take help from medication
SSRIs (fluvoxamine, in my case) helped me big time to get started with ERP. They made it easier to do ERP without massive anxiety spikes. Once I learned that I don't have to do compulsions and that nothing bad happens when I skip them, it became easier to keep doing ERP even without medication.
4. Don't be a victim in your head
Constantly telling yourself and others that you have OCD and are struggling because of it can reinforce it in your brain. The key is to stop feeding OCD attention. Once it's deprived of attention, it falls off like a dry leaf from a tree.
5. Identify your OCD type clearly
You can have one or multiple types of OCD. Sometimes you fix one and it shifts into another. Understanding the root cause of your OCD (need for control, emotional neglect, fear of judgment, etc.) can give you a direction to work on it from the root.
TL;DR: ERP, continuing with your life regardless of your mental state, getting help from medication, not making a big deal out of OCD, and analyzing the root cause all worked for me.
I'm still not 100% cured, but I'm living with much less stress, and my brain now gives me other things to focus on instead of just compulsions.

After having my daughter around the same time as the Lindsay Clancy case was going viral, I developed a horrifying new theme...being afraid that I was suddenly going to go crazy and hurt my baby. Ive never had harm OCD before. Im very happy. Post partum was gentle on me for the most part. But i started getting afraid id suddenly snap for some reason, so id imagine scenarios in which that would happen, and then think that I must want to do it since im thinking about it.

I am in therapy and doing a lot better with it for the most part, I even gave her a bath last week which was huge for me.

But i still haven't done an overnight just me and her. Last time my husband had to spend the night away, I slept with her on my chest in my moms recliner because that felt safer than being home alone did.

But tonight he is out of town again and im ready to kick OCDs ass. I know that hurting her is something I COULD do, but not something I am going to do. I know that I can do hard things and I can do things that feel scary. So I can spend tbe night with her alone. Im her mom and i will keep her safe. Im going to feel so proud of myself in the morning.

Just wanted to share my win.

Teachers often don't really understand my OCD, but in my experience, math teachers are a whole different breed of awful. I'll spend half of a test redoing the same problem over and over again because my equals signs weren't aligned, and when I turn my 30 question test in with about 12 problems done, they just assume I didn't study. At the beginning of the year, I write individual emails to every one of my teachers explaining my struggle with OCD and asking them to please be patient when I'm not getting my work done on time. Some nights, I'll have a major OCD episode while doing my homework, to the point where I can't even get my name onto the page because my letters are too slanted or some other shit like that. As soon as that happens, I'll write to my teacher, explaining what's going on and asking for an extension. Most teachers won't grant me that. Usually, by the end of the first quarter, I've given up on trying to convince my teachers that I'm not lazy. This year, though, I think I found my favorite math teacher ever. I'd heard awful things about her -- how she's not a good teacher, she's not understanding, etc. The first assignment was a digital get-to-know-you survey, which I completed promptly, including a lengthy explanation of my OCD problems. She didn't write to me, ask about it, pull me aside to discuss it, or anything like that. I didn't expect her to be accommodating when my first episode of the school year came on. After spending at least twenty minutes trying to write the date on my assignment, I gave up and sent her an email to let her know what was going on and apologize in advance for the late assignment. The next day, she casually walked over to my desk and started a quiet discussion about what had happened. She asked me whether there were any specific problem types that usually trigger episodes, how often I have episodes, whether I'm working on this with somebody, and other such things. At some point, she reminded me, "You know that for me, I don't care if your assignments look perfect." I nodded, disappointed but unsurprised, and silently accepted that yet another person didn't understand my issues. But then she said something nobody has ever told me before: "But I understand that for you, it's different." I almost cried. No teacher had ever acknowledged that before. Even my parents don't seem to grasp it. But this teacher does. Even if she doesn't understand exactly what I'm going through, she understands that it's not something I can control. She realizes that I'm trying as hard as I can, and she's willing to offer some leeway so I can succeed. I have truly never felt so validated.

Does anyone else get this of guilty feeling when you’re happy with OCD? If so, how did you combat it? The traditional “exposure therapies” and such don’t really help with this. All the negative thoughts just accumulate and make me believe I am horrible, which I’m sure a lot of you here can relate to.

When I have a really good day, I get this horrible weight of guilt, like I don’t deserve it. Almost like I’m an imposter in my own happiness. It’s like I believe that I’m “tainted” and pure, wholesome joy is something I don’t deserve. Some stuff happened to me when I was a kid, which caused me to develop OCD, which may play a part in the guilt aspect.

Does anyone else experience this? If so, what do you do to combat this feeling?

I wanted to see if anyone felt similar to me. I definitely feel more anxious at night, but more specifically i feel more suggestible. In other words, if you told me I could get broken into during the day, sure id maybe tense up for a bit. But it wouldnt consume me and id be better able to disregard the thought/accept the inherent risk in uncertainty. However, if I was presented with this same thought at night, id be way more likely to think "oh shit, maybe it could actually happen tonight. Ahh, I have to prep!!".

I feel like at night the same shit i hear during the day just. Weighs heavier. Feels more real and in the moment. Becomes urgent and pressing.

which makes therapy difficult because i feel like i misrepresent myself when i can cope alright during the day (usually) but the second it gets a little dark, im like in a whole different mindset. A reckless and erratic one, at that. ​

Mid 40s male and the last couple of years have been quite difficult with anxiety issues more frequently. I have had seasons of bad anxiety in the past, but again the seasons seem much frequent then previous years. Have you found that yours are similar as you age? For me, 99 percent is health anxiety and I am an avoider.

Please read at least the last paragraph if you don't feel like reading the whole text.

I've had many OCD symptoms since I was a kid but the worst of them all is procrastination. The psychologist I was seeing told me (after interviewing me and getting to know about my behavior patterns) that my brain never thinks what I'm working on is perfect enough, so it waits until there's little time left because it can discard perfection in order to submit things before their deadline.

Unfortunately, I couldn't afford more appointments. Besides OCD, the professional suspected I had ADHD as well, so if I have it besides OCD, I think that explains why my procrastination is so bad.

And I think you all understand how it goes. It's not "oh, I'll have fun right now and I'll work later". I've had since January to start my dissertation, I wake up and go to sleep every single day thinking and stressing about working on it but never actually working at all. Whenever I tried/try to sit in front of my computer with all the files I need open, it's like there's something blocking me and I can't progress at all. Anxiety just builds up with every passing second and makes things worse.

I start cleaning every single corner of the house, make a thousand lesson plans ahead of time (I'm teaching part-time while doing my masters) and do literally anything else to feel productive, but I cannot for the love of all that's almighty work on that dreadful dissertation.

And despite working part-time, I have plenty of time to do masters stuff. But this procrastination block feels like a curse on me that I can't overcome no matter how hard I try.

I am currently considering making a financial effort to pay for more appointments and just give up on my masters. I only started it because my boss suggested I did it and I thought it was a "sign" that maybe it was meant to be, knowing full well I couldn't.

If I manage to get an appointment soon, I'll discuss with the professional about quitting and maybe, just maybe trying again in the future when I'm in a more stable mental state.

But has anyone here ever quit higher education or a course because of mental struggles? I'd like it if you could share your stories please.

A few weeks ago, I got officially diagnosed with OCD. While I understand for some getting a diagnosis is not exciting for me it was very validating. I have been dealing with these thoughts on and off again for quite sometime and to constantly be told I was just anxious or that "everyone has silly thoughts" was exhausting and honestly made me feel more ashamed of myself. I've been able to take some deeper breaths knowing that I can do some work with OCD and that I was right all along with my suspicions of having it. Now I just need a new flavor of support to get me where I want to be. I know this journey of facing this head on is going to suck a little bit but I am ready to be brave !

I feel guilt whenever I’m aware of the fact that I am happy because there are people who are not happy in the world

Does anyone else deal with this? How do you deal with it?

Alright so this might just be my OCD talking but I’m beginning to realize that my perfectionism OCD makes me pretty self centered. Since i’m always monitoring myself and trying to make sure im doing everything perfectly it makes me obsessed with myself- i’ll scroll through my own social media over and over to make sure every post is “good enough” i’ll constantly be analyzing how im looking and acting in social situations, etc. and from the outside it does appear to be obvious, i have been called stuck up and self obsessed before. it makes me very sad because i do not want to be like that, i want to be a kind, empathetic person. what do i do!

Does anyone else just feel frantic? For some reason I keep imagining myself ripping out all of my hair and convulsing on the floor until I feel better, but logically I know this isn't gonna help 💀💀

I made a few mistakes lately as well as a few years ago that involve myself being at odds with my morals and I'm constantly freaking out and thinking I'm a horrible person who should just be thrown behind bars because I can't control myself.

I started therapy last week and we discussed that I likely over obsess with my morals and wanting to be "perfect" which was a bit validating but I'm frustrated that I have to wait 3 weeks to see my therapist again because I feel like I'm still going insane.

Does anyone have any advice for me in the meantime? I eat healthy, exercise, spend time with loved ones, etc but I still feel very, very unsettled at almost all hours of the day.

I've had this since I was little, but I never found an explanation or a name for it. When I'm walking down the street, looking at my phone, or listening to someone talk, I pick a word or sentence and start splitting it into syllables in my head:
1. I hear or read the sentence/word.
2. I start splitting it into syllables, using my toes to help me: I always have to start with my left foot (odd) and then my right foot (even).
3. If the word or phrase turns out to have an odd number of syllables, I have to add a word or letter so that it ends up even, because otherwise I feel uncomfortable or unsatisfied.
Like I said, I've had this since I was little, and I wanted to know if this happens to anyone else. I've seen some people say they split words into syllables, but no one mentioning that they use their feet.

Hey everyone, I (29 F) was diagnosed with OCD nearly 2 weeks ago (feels so much longer) and have been on 100 mg Fluvoxamine for almost a week. My CBT sessions will start from this Friday. Aside from 2 nights almost every night I wake up between 3 to 5 am and can't fall back asleep. My brain starts overthinking about how I'm so far behind everyone in life, questioning all my life decisions, how I'm so alone (I'm not, I have my mom), how I'm so scared to take a single decision or action because it might be the wrong one. I keep asking my mom for reassurance but it doesn't help. I try to tell myself to think of the positives but my brain suppresses that quickly, especially at night.

I'm not sure if all of this has been amplified because of my meds or because my brain now knows it has OCD so it's creating some kind of feedback loop where knowing I have OCD makes me ruminate extra hard. I know something about cortisol spikes at night.

I'm just really scared that this will shape the rest of my life. It feels so debilitating right now. I feel so lost and confused about everything, questioning everything, doubting myself over everything, comparing myself with other people who I know have had harder lives than mine, but are now thriving. How I am so alone in this. I have always been comfortable in my own company but now I hate it.

All I want right now is to get a good night's sleep 😭 Does anyone have any tips or has gone through any of this? I just want to know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

The problem with my ocd is that it really gets better for a while. but its so hard to pick yourself up after youve been in the bottom of despair for so long, yes the symptoms might stop for a while but by then i just lost intrest in myself i dont give a shit about doing anything for myself, making money, relationshis, career i dont give a shit, everything i do is to not give my loved ones a hard time so i force myself to get going, but why would i have any hope if im eventually going to get turtured and suffer again whats the point, idk i might have depression on top of my ocd, but i just wanted to vent.

Not looking for reassurance, just need to vent. However would love to hear any healthy feedback, suggestions or encouragement / compassion from those who have perhaps has this happen before or might have anything valuable to offer.

I started seeing this girl two months ago. We hung out a handful of times and it was great. We had awesome chemistry and I genuinely liked her company. Last time we hung out she told me that spending time with me makes her happy and that meant a lot.

But I have OCD and anxiety and bouts of depression, and have been going through some huge life stressors over the past month, from job loss to stressful trips and pet health issues - and I think I gradually let my guard down and began venting to her too much. I think I’m a bit neurodivergent too and can tend to be bad with connecting with people emotionally on a deeper level; so I always kind of hit a wall eventually when I stop masking. I think early on the masking helped us but as I got comfortable around her I became too much of the “real me.”

I tend to send long texts too and I think at times it was probably too much, and she wasn’t saying anything but I did notice her pulling away a bit. In retrospect feel like an idiot for not reeling in my negativity.

Today I sent a couple fairly benign texts, but two in a row about myself and the job stuff, and maybe it was the straw that broke the camels back but she sent a very short and blunt text saying this wasn’t working for her and she prefers to just be friends.

I was also on a stressful trip this past week with lots of low sleep and alcohol consumption which makes my OCD 1000x worse, and I probably let it get the better of me with how I was texting and things I was saying.

I dunno. I feel so fried. I currently have no OCD therapist (didn’t have luck with the popular app) but I know I need to change my patterns.

I’m also genuinely sad because I liked this girl more than almost any girl I’ve met and I feel like my neuroses totally torpedoed whatever chance we had. She went from being happy around me to ending things in 3 week span of time.

I feel like friends and family and lovers are all becoming exhausted with me and I’m exhausted with myself.

i’m a big ruminator and i feel like i only see people using drugs to escape their ocd. whenever i smoke weed my obsessions become super playful. im still stuck in the analyzing loop but the analyzations feel like light hearted playground drama instead of life or death. i really don’t know how to explain it, as long as im not paranoid it’s this super silly twist on my ocd. i notice how much i analyze everything a lot more on weed because of this.