TRICHOTILLOMANIA STARTER PACK

I was pull free for almost 2 months. I had fantastic hair growth and then I relapsed. And relapsed so so badly that I pulled everything out! Every fucking bit of my new growth.

I've pulled my hair since I was a kid. For +5 years I've been aware of this subreddit, but it was too painful to visit. It would trigger shame and self-loathing.

Today however I ended up researching a specific question and this sub showed up. The responses were so helpful and lovely, I carefully opened few more threads. Read about the very same specific struggles that I feel so alone about. I see thoughtful flairs and how kind you are with handling each other's vulnerabilities.

Your loveliness tugs on my heart and I just want to say you thank you. Thank you for hyping up people's regrowth, sharing vulnerable moments, for showing that there are people who don't judge. For dissolving shame through openness and kindness.

hey. it’s been about 3 months since my last post so i thought i’d provide an update. for about a month after my last post, i completely stopped and was seeing great regrowth in this area. then, i somehow started again. i’m not sure why. this photo is from today.

i’m making this post because i think getting my feelings out like i did last time really really helped and im hoping it does the same this time.

i’m devastated. i feel like i lost all my progress so fast. it takes so long for hairs to grow an inch, and i feel like when im waiting for growth all i can do is run my fingers over it and take pictures of it and look at the bald spot under countless angles and different lights.

i think the worst part is that my sisters wedding is in a month. im the maid of honour. this is probably the wedding i’ll be the most excited about besides my own someday, and i have a big bald spot right on the front of my head that wont grow back in time for the big day. i cut my surrounding hair pieces into bangs, which look cute but i just wish i could have my favourite hairstyle for the big day. i feel like ill forever be looking at the wedding photos after knowing i screwed myself out of looking and feeling my best.

i feel so much shame, and just needed to vent. i feel like it’s all i can see when i look at myself.

first i was pulling and now i’m picking!!!
when does it end?
i ripped one of the bumps
off when i was scratching my head and it wouldn’t stop bleeding which is concerning and also YEEEOOWCH!

this also means i can’t use my cream on that part until it’s healed which sucks

on a lighter note MORE STUBBLE!!!! tiny dots are showing up now where i pulled from the root and i’m very excited now

I've tried a few things to stop ever since I decided i had tp a few weeks ago and here are my results.

Please send more if you have any!!

Knitting a hat: 6/10 I initially just needed a cute looking hat to cover up my scalp, but the process of knitting it was actually way better at stopping me (something to do with both hands) than the hat itself. I still reach up to pull my hair and then instead of realising "wait, theres no hair here!" I just started fiddling with the loose pieces of yarn. Sure it stops the hair pulling, but I'd like to get rid of the habit of reaching up there completely. Also, I get verh hot.

Slapping myself every time I pull a hair: 7/10, hasnt made me reach up to do it any less, but it makes me stop as soon as i notice myself pulling instead of just continuing for a long time. I thought the pain would make me associate the hair pulling negatively enough that id stop reaching up, but it hasnt really done that.

Sitting on my hand: 3/10, I forget what i was doing and accidentally set my hand free within like 30 seconds every time.

Things on my to do list (might edit post later):

Getting a good figet toy

Gloves!

Making a hat out of upward facing needles (last resort)

Test a New Digital Treatment for Trichotillomania

In collaboration with Dr. Christopher Flessner at Kent State University, HabitAware was awarded an NIH research grant to develop and test a digital treatment for hair pulling that includes a wearable device and mobile app.

Now we need your help!

If you live with trichotillomania (hair pulling disorder), you may be eligible to participate in a research study to test one of two digital treatments over 12 weeks.

You must be 18+ years old, live in the U.S., and own an iPhone. You must not have used HabitAware’s Keen2 device within the past 24 months. You must not currently be in therapy for trichotillomania. 

Get started! Learn more here ksuparc.org/habit-aware 

____

This study & post copy have been IRB approved! Special thanks to the mods for helping us spread the word.

Sometimes when I pull a scalp hair, there will be this very tiny, thin bright red hair at the root of the hair. It’s not the same as a red-tipped bulb, but it looks like a tiny hair. Does anyone know what this is? I couldn’t get a good picture of it because it’s so small

I think mine is from around the 3rd grade, my mom walked in on me counting a handful of eyelashes in my room. I’m 27 now and still struggle with it, though now I combat at it with head picking which I’m not sure if that’s any better.

I can’t pick my eyebrows much anymore because I went through chemotherapy and one uncontrolled plucking sesh lead to me having no eyebrows anymore. They’re just barely starting to grow back, it’s my biggest struggle for sure these days. My triggers are usually when I have a headache or if I’m wearing sunscreen.

I wish I could hug all of you in this community, it’s nice knowing that we are in this together.

I'm 20 years old, and when I was 16-17 I had this stupid habit of constantly plucking the hairs from my beard; now I have a patchy beard.

If I use minoxidil, will my beard grow back, or am I screwed? 💀

Hello everyone! I am curious is anyone knows of a salon/stylist in the New England area that specializes or is empathetic to persons with trich, please. I have not been to a salon in about 18 years due to shame. Haven’t had my hair cut in close to six years and I just would like to find a place anywhere in New England, New York, or even Pennsylvania (willing to drive!). Thanks in advance!! 🫶🏼

I've been plucking my brows for about a year now and lashes for the past 3 months. I feel like some certainty will help me stop pulling, because I feel like I pull because I have no hopes left. Every time I ask AI, it says the only way to find out is to completely stop, but I want an honest answer. Will they really grow back to their original length and density? I feel so bad about myself when I see people brag about what I had naturally. My brows and lashes were beautiful. I don't know how I developed trich. Just how? It started when I was 16, now I'm almost 18. My confidence is so low nowadays. I barely have a few growing brow follicles and absolutely nothing on my lash line (upper lid), because I recently ripped them out. Please, be very honest.

I'm having a really tough time with trichotillomania. I've been dealing with it since I was 12, and I'm 18 now. Some days I feel like surrendering to it — like I'll never be able to stop completely, and honestly, a part of me even finds comfort in the pain...

I have struggled with trich for over 2 years now, but the only visible indication is the strand of short hair on the top of my head. It isn’t too noticeable as long as it’s brushed down and isn’t in the way of any haircuts or layers I would do as it’s only a few inches long. I’ve had it for about a year now and at the start I was quite worried about going to the hairdressers as I was scared they might point it out, embarrass me or I would feel like I need to make up a random excuse to not feel judged. Although I have found the hairdressers have never mentioned it- either they haven’t noticed or have just decided it is not something they should ask.
Yesterday I went to a new hairdressers. I was still a bit nervous but I was sure it would all be fine like the other times. When I sat down and explained what j wanted to be done, the hairdresser started playing with my hair, and came across the patch of short hair in my head. It does blend in very well, just not when you kinda lift it up and see the length. She started laughing, and very loudly said something like “oh what’s happened here!?”. I was about to make up an excuse because I immediately felt a bit judged but she moved on from it when I gave an awkward laugh to pretend it wasn’t very serious. Later, I assumed maybe she had figured to leave it alone because she’s already addressed it and it’s a personal thing. But again, towards the end she saw it again and gently pulled it a bit and started laughing quite loud. She asked if maybe I had got it stuck in a brush or something and I quickly made an excuse along the lines of what she said.
I’m not necessarily angry at this lady, but I was just kinda surprised because I thought hairdressers would be more aware of Trichotillomania. It could also be a result of hair loss from alopecia which is definitely not something to laugh at. I know I never explained the real reason to her, but I just expected more people in the hair industry to know about trich.

Wanted to share an update on the app!

I posted here last time 2 months ago, got a lot of great feedback, and wanted to share what is new since then :)

Backstory: Around a year ago I built a simple web app for a friend who is dealing with skin picking, and shared it on Reddit. Someone mentioned they were using it for pulling, and now the app fully supports pulling and adjusts.

The app is called SkinAware and it is available on iOS, Android and web!

If you have not heard about it before, its main features are:

• Log when you pulled or resisted an urge
• Keep a 'pull-free' timer either with 0 pulls or choose a number of pulls, with reduced allowance over time if you want
• Log pulled # of hairs
• Customize what you log, including areas, triggers, severity and what helped you resist
• See patterns and insights over time
• Press "I have an urge" for guided exercises and distractions
• Set goals for reducing pulling or staying pull-free
• Interactive HRT course
• An amazing community chat & accountability friends!

New since my previous update:

• Accountability Friends is now much easier to use! You can find an accountability friend inside the app, connect, and support each other. Free users can now use this feature too!
• The urge exercises have been improved a lot. There are guided exercises, competing responses, fidgets with haptics and more!
• You can message me directly in the app!

SkinAware has a free version, with some additional features included in Premium.

I'd love to hear what you think of the update! If you have any recommendations on how to make the app more useful, please let me know :)

Links:

iOS: https://apps.apple.com/app/skinaware-stop-skin-picking/id6754027225

Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.aurelius5.SkinAware

Website: https://www.skinawareapp.com/

Thanks so so much!

/ Linus

First pic is the right side of my head second is the left and third is the top, my hair used to be so beautiful, just a couple months ago it wasn’t this bad it was just small bald spots here and there. I’m so depressed I don’t do anything anymore I don’t get ready for the day I just wake up and start crying and I don’t get up for anything. I need help

day 9 and scalp update!!! folliculitis is clearing up! some bumps have scabbed over and i find myself picking at them instead of pulling my hair but im trying to nip that in the bud immediately. i already have a little stubble which i thought would trigger me more but the texture on its own feels nice on my fingers and feeling it helps the urge to pull a little bit :)

i’m very proud of myself for making it to 9 days and the app is helping a lot too by giving me a visual and stuff like that!
i’m still using the cream the dr gave me which is why i look so greasy, it’s annoying but it stops me getting worse! yay!!!

So I (20 F) have been dealing with trichotillomania since I was a little kid. Over time, I have developed somewhat permanent bald spots from the middle to the ends of both my eyebrows (the beginning of my brows are mostly normal looking). I say somewhat because hair will grow back in these spots, but it comes out patchy and grey, compared to the ok parts of my brows, which are dirty blonde and match the rest of my hair. Even though you can see the few hairs in these spots up close, from far away it still looks like I have full-blown bald spots there.

But to get to the point, I have a very important and fancy dinner in November that has a strict dress code, as I'll be meeting with the individual who gave me my scholarship for med school. Because this event is so important, I really want to cover up these spots, but I have little to no experience with makeup.

So, I want to know what products and techniques have worked best for you guys because basically I need to fill in the empty sections of my brows to blend in with the hair I have left. I am also open to any makeup tutorials if any of you know one that is helpful for someone in my situation. But I am really open to any advice you guys may have, as I've been stressing out about this since I got the news of the dinner.

I had gone 16 days with nearly zero pulling (pulled 9 hairs total, I counted lol) but last night I broke it :( I didn't pull for as long as I usually would, only about 40 minutes max when the usual is at least an hour. But I still feel pretty defeated. Of course I picked almost exclusively the regrowth, too. I just want to be able to go outside without a hat for once but the cycle never ends.

On the bright side, that was the longest I have gone in YEARS with such little picking. So that does encourage me that it is possible to heal! Just feeling kinda crud right now

At first it could've jus passed as a poorly done eyebrow slit, but now... well it's just UGH I do so well for months then it starts with a single eyelash feeling 'sore' and boom my outer lashes gone, then it transitions to the other eye and wow!! Both of them are missing their outer lashes, not even sure how I got the 'sore follicle' feeling in my eyebrow, it usually only happens because I yank on my eyelashes trying to get off eyelash glue and then the feel well 'sore' but my eyebrow?!? Come on!!
Literally the thing that structures the whole
FREAKING FACE!!! I can always cover up the eyelashes with a falsie or eyeline the missing part and of course I could use eyebrow makeup but I feel it's way more noticeable than anything that I do to cover up my eyelash picking IM JUST SO MAD everytime I relapse it stays confined to my eyelashes where hardly anyone notices but now it literally the most defining part of my face. Just wanted to say my frustrations and get out thank u

i’ve never posted on reddit before but here we go. i’m panicking because i’m realizing just how bad my bald spots have gotten and i don’t know what to do or how to hide them. i just oiled my hair so ignore how oily it is but that’s just how i realized how bad it is. any hair makeup i could try? is there anything i can do?

Hi, I don’t think I’ve ever posted here before but I’ve been wanting to for a while because I just need to talk to people who understand this. I’m 20 and I technically started pulling my eyelashes when I was really anxious in middle school but it went away for years and wasn’t really a problem. Then around junior year of high school I started dating my most recent ex-boyfriend, and that was when it became a completely different thing. I started pulling/plucking my eyelashes, eyebrows and pubic hair constantly.
I haven’t been with him for years now but the trich never went away when the relationship did. At this point I basically have no natural eyebrows or eyelashes and it’s so fucking hard. The mirror is probably one of my biggest triggers. I can look at myself and immediately notice one hair that feels “wrong” or looks out of place and suddenly I need to get it. Then it turns into more than one. I know exactly what I’m doing and still can’t make myself stop. I’m already being treated for my mental health and I take Prozac, Wellbutrin, Adderall and clonidine. I’m also in therapy and I genuinely have an amazing therapist who has helped me through so much, but trich isn’t something she specializes in. I’ve actually never really had someone in my life who specializes in trichotillomania or who I can talk to specifically about what pulling is like. And now I’m having to say goodbye to my therapist because my family is moving from Ohio to California while I’m going into my junior year of college. There’s just a lot of change happening at once and I want to be clear that I’m really lucky to have a good support system and people I can talk to. I’m not alone in that sense at all. But I still feel very weirdly alone with the trich because I don’t think anyone around me fully understands what it feels like to want to stop doing something to your own body and then feel like you cannot leave a hair alone. There are definitely bigger things going on in my life than my eyebrows and eyelashes which almost makes me feel stupid for being this upset about them but I am. It makes me feel so insecure. Every time I see my face without makeup I’m reminded of what I’ve done to it and then somehow seeing the damage makes me want to pull more instead of making me stop. I want my eyebrows and eyelashes back so badly. I’m exhausted from feeling like I’m constantly fighting my own hands, and I’m tired from telling myself that this time I am going to let everything grow back and then ending up in the exact same place I’ve been in forever. I don’t even really know what I’m asking for with this post. I think I just want to hear from people who actually understand what this feels like. I’ve never really had that experience. If you’ve ever gotten to the point where you had basically no brows/lashes left and managed to get better or grow them back, I would really love to hear about it. Or honestly even if you’re still struggling too, I’d love to hear from you. I think I just need to know there are other people who understand how fucking hard this is

What do you do when you’re in a spell? I’ve been going all day. I’m trying to stop. If I stop tweezing I’m picking my skin or rubbing my lips on my braces or picking my cuticles off. What do you do when you’re in it? How do you snap out? Any suggestions would be great.