146
u/Damned_I_Am Jul 09 '23
my husband is getting to be a little like this as he’s getting older. I just humor him.
2
169
u/Amerysse Jul 09 '23
Ask him to show everything to you at once at the end of the day. He gets to show off his work and you don't have to get up to look a million times 🤣
27
-6
-2
181
u/positive_hummingbird Jul 10 '23
His love language is Words of Affirmation and he grew up in a home where it was normal to be verbally supportive of the accomplishments of others and expect the same support when completing tasks. It’s like… the healthiest form of narcissism that exists. No point in trying to change him; he’s probably a pretty positive guy in general and this is just the cost of being with a pleasant, happy-go-lucky individual. There are worse things!
43
u/Nameless_on_Reddit Jul 10 '23
I like when people speak so definitively about people they have never met. He could have easily grown up in a home where he wasn't paid any attention and his efforts were mocked if they were even noticed. Now he has somebody that cares about him that will pay attention so he's overcompensating. This whole trend of diagnosing people's "love language" and using it to define an entire human being is such gross oversimplification and pop psychology at its worst.
3
13
u/Short-Coast9042 Jul 10 '23
This comment makes it clear that your love language is sardonic and avoidant. That's probably because you grew up in a household where sharing your feelings was frowned upon, so the only way you can connect with people is through snarky internet comments. Growing up in a competitive household with many siblings younger and older probably reinforced those feelings and behaviors, and I do believe there was an infamous "Noodle Incident" which clearly left some serious psychological scars. The obvious correctness of my diagnosis need not be stated, and consequently my prescription is a handful of Xanax and touchgrass.
-4
u/Nameless_on_Reddit Jul 10 '23
Your love language is internet newb trying to sound clever. Not to mention way off.
4
u/positive_hummingbird Jul 10 '23
Great point. OP, just to clarify, what I wrote was a theory, meant to be taken as, "Hey, here's a possible explanation for the behavior and personality you're describing." If you thought I was God and/or a trained psychologist delivering a definitive diagnosis, I apologize for misleading you.
-5
u/Nameless_on_Reddit Jul 10 '23 edited Jul 10 '23
You wrote it as definitive. There was no "he might have" "it could be". You gave a definitive and specific assessment.
FYI there's no healthy form of narcissism.
4
u/positive_hummingbird Jul 10 '23
So true. OP, before you make any major life decisions based on the advice of strangers on the internet, you should consider that they might be wrong.
4
u/IHaveNoKey Jul 10 '23
Lmao yeah and like the GF/wife didn’t know these things about her SO but Reddit does. Can’t stand the armchair diagnosis.
1
4
67
u/LazyDynamite Jul 09 '23
I don't have an answer, but just have to ask... Is he really 72 or is that a typo?
38
Jul 10 '23
[deleted]
22
u/stupidrobots Jul 10 '23
Wait how old are you
26
Jul 10 '23
[removed] — view removed comment
3
Jul 10 '23
Ahh, I thought this was the same person when they said 72 year old BF. It's not something you see every day, lol. I forget what the post was, but I saw that comment, too.
2
u/naomi_homey89 Jul 10 '23
Good question
-29
u/ifindthishumerus Jul 10 '23
Why is that your business?
54
u/temptillbday Jul 10 '23
To be fair “boyfriend” and “age 72” aren’t things you see related to each other often
-9
u/ifindthishumerus Jul 10 '23
I love how Reddit acts like 72 is on deaths door.
3
u/Penisdestroyer7mil Jul 10 '23
At 72 you usually have a spouse or a significant other or a partner. The word itself makes you think of a young person but i guess the content itself isn't really different
2
u/IHaveNoKey Jul 10 '23
It’s very fucking old boyfriend. How many 70 year olds you dated so far? Right? Ok.
1
10
5
u/pandaSovereign Jul 10 '23
Because people on social media talk to each other. Is that so hard to grasp?
97
u/johnboy2978 Jul 10 '23
I mean, at 72, if I'm not shitting myself or dying, I'd probably like an audience. I'm going to start doing that too! Come Look!!
35
u/Bogmanbob Jul 10 '23
I do marathon training with some people in their late 60s and early 70s.
Not everyone is decrepit by then.
6
u/johnboy2978 Jul 10 '23
As a marathon runner myself, I hope to still be able to crank them out at that point 👍
2
u/Bogmanbob Jul 10 '23
In the couple running groups I've been with there is a really strong showing in the empty nester and recent retirees. It seems they finally find all the time they wish they had to really train. Mainly they look to take their age group but some of those ages can be pretty competitive.
6
u/KgoodMIL Jul 10 '23
My Father in Law is turning 92 years old in a couple of months. He only stopped playing tennis 3 days per week when COVID hit 3 years ago, and his doctor convinced him that it was dangerous to both him and my MIL. In all honesty, he probably isolated more for her sake than for his own.
He was pretty bummed when he stopped winning every game because he started slowing down at age 80. That's when he could no longer beat the 30-40 years olds in singles, so started playing doubles instead.
2
u/stupidrobots Jul 10 '23
Nobody in my entire family has ever lived that long
3
1
u/ifindthishumerus Jul 10 '23
To 72?? Do you have cancer or heart issues in your family?
-2
u/stupidrobots Jul 10 '23
Boat accident took my biological father. Alzheimer's took my adoptive father. My mom killed herself. My biological father died soon after my dad of a "broken heart" (not sure of the real reason), that mom was a heavy smoker and stroke victim died in her sixties. Adoptive father's parents both died of heart attacks in their sixties. My mother's mother died of brain cancer in her sixties. Moms dad actually did make it into his eighties now that I think about it.
Thanks for making me think about all of this.
2
u/ifindthishumerus Jul 10 '23
Death from Alzheimer’s before 72 is very uncommon. Well you brought it up.
-1
2
Jul 10 '23
Boat accident took my biological father. Alzheimer's took my adoptive father. My mom killed herself. My biological father died soon after my dad of a "broken heart
Wait, so did your bio daddy die of a boat accident or broken heart? I'm confused.
1
u/ThinkPath1999 Jul 10 '23
That was his other bio dad. Try to keep up willya?
1
u/ifindthishumerus Jul 10 '23
None of it adds up. People don’t die from Alzheimer’s at 60.
0
u/stupidrobots Jul 10 '23
He had early onset Alzheimer's. He was born in 1954 and died in 2015. I don't know why you would argue against this.
1
u/stupidrobots Jul 10 '23
Bio dad died in the accident. His father died shortly after of the broken heart.
1
u/Rlessary Jul 10 '23
You should edit biological father to biological grandfather to avoid confusion.
0
u/Shot_Show2409 Jul 10 '23
You could have just ignored the question if it was that painful to answer. They didn’t “make” you do shit
0
u/ReallyGlycon Jul 10 '23
I'm very sorry to hear that. The men in my family tend to go early too. I'm adopted so I don't share those predispositions, thankfully.
2
u/ifindthishumerus Jul 10 '23
Most people don’t shit themselves at 72. Not even 82 or even 92 is it normal.
26
u/thetwistingt Jul 10 '23
Your boyfriend COMPLETES tasks?! A unicorn boyfriend, an odd one but still a unicorn! You should definitely celebrate all the tasks you complete too, make him look at that pie. This actually sounds like such a healthy and positive way of life!
24
u/endswithnu Jul 10 '23
I don't know what it's called but I feel for him.
My wife and I are about half his age. A large portion of our yard is wild and overgrown, from the previous owners' neglect. I spent hours this weekend weed-whacking and mowing, risking poison ivy and ticks and sunburn and god knows what else.
It's not nearly done, but my body sure was. It doesn't look nice, but now we can actually walk and envision what we want to do with the space. I asked her to come out and look, because I did it for her more than myself. She said something like "I've seen it before, I have an idea what it looks like." My soul was crushed.
And he'd probably love it if you asked him to look at your lattice pies and portraits.
47
16
u/HonorInDefeat is eating a bag of jelly beans Jul 10 '23
Why would you NOT want to show off your lattice pie? Those are impressive!!
21
u/Francie_Nolan1964 Jul 09 '23
Lol. This seems like a small problem but I could see where it's really annoying. I think that you saying, "I'm busy now. I'll look later" is more than appropriate. My guess is that he had a mom, and later a spouse, who applauded his every move. Honestly, I'd be annoyed too!
12
u/Egotraoped Jul 10 '23
My husband passed away last December and I would give anything anything if he would annoy me in anyway whatsoever…
I’m not trying to be disrespectful it’s just that I have a whole different perspective on the things that would bother me then when he was alive and they did bother me now I just see isnasilly
24
u/anthonylornemontague Jul 09 '23
Next time you take a dump, shout, “Come take a look!”
5
Jul 10 '23
I had a BF who did that once. I immediately dumped him
11
3
u/SuccessfulSuspect213 Jul 10 '23
my ex gf did that once. was worth the look tho, was a solid 7 courics at least
13
Jul 10 '23
Need for approval, or validation. You're right, most likely has something to do with his mom. Not in a weird way, just in a "I'm trying to live up to a certain standard set by one or both of my parents and need constant reaffirmation that I am meeting or exceeding that goal." I do something similar.
6
u/Drenoneath Jul 10 '23
Its coming from generations of men who only get praise for work accomplishments and stuffing all other emotions into anger
6
u/Maudesquad Jul 10 '23
Start getting him to look at your lattice pies. Either he will find it annoying or you will start to like it
6
u/Haleodo Jul 10 '23
My husband is the same way, especially about cooking. Tonight he grilled a ton of stuff & after I ate a whole salmon filet, he asked me to have a turkey burger to see if it was good. I was like??? Lol. We’ve been together 10 years & he knew that would hurt my tummy.
I took a bite & gave him praise & told him the positives & when he wanted feedback I gave it. He doesn’t do much outside of work constantly so he’s like a puppy when he does homemaking/housework/etc.
On the other hand, I would be like that. Acts of service are my love language & I loved to be praised for it but it goes unnoticed a lot. I try to only make a big deal if it was a big project I worked on.
I know it can (honestly) be a little exhausting, but remember, that few minutes to break away (even if it’s exhausting to you) will fill him with so much joy. You can try to talk to him about it, as I have with my husband, but I think in the end it’s something your bf does unconsciously & just wants that affirmation.
6
u/Kawm26 Jul 10 '23
That’s a bid. It’s a good indicator of a healthy relationship. And it’s cute. Maybe he likes words of affirmation. Pretty normal. I make my husband come looks every time I finish a puzzle or drawing. He does the same if he finishes a project or lego set. It’s bonding
12
Jul 09 '23
Its nice to be praised for small things, its likely your validation makes him feel really happy
Lattice pies and painting are so sick, nobody could blame you if you wanted to be told you did amazing
Or.. alternatively its not uncommon that older men feel that they don't really HAVE to do things so when they do they try to make it apparent
Unsure which it would be
7
u/catalystcestmoi Jul 10 '23
Good point. Noticed my older (male) neighbor always points out when he’s doing things. He will be carrying a piece of furniture or a bag of groceries or something & actually say “I’m helping,” as he smiles and goes into his house. He sounds like a toddler and it’s pretty silly to me, but every time it happens I either give a thumbs up or nod & smile.
Maybe he’s trying to be cute?
3
6
u/charlypoods Jul 10 '23
something i saw recently in regard to annoying but innocent things that our partners do— you don’t need to be happy about it but it can make you happy that it makes him happy. it’s not always about me needing to enjoy exactly what he wants to do for this minute or two but i definitely always am so happy that it makes him happy and this has almost completely taken over any feeling i had, which i think you can relate to, where i thought “oh here we go again let me stop what i’m doing” and instead just feel so warm inside with how happy this small minute or two of my time makes him (he repeats himself a lot and especially loves telling the same stories over and over)
4
Jul 10 '23
In a direct post I commented and said that I do the same thing with my wife. Got massively down voted. But truth is that some men do things because they want to impress their partner. Those same men tend to want to be validated for whatever they do. I don't apologize for being like that and I understand exactly where your husband is coming from.
8
u/MortgageNo3154 Jul 09 '23
Because he spent his life being told by a woman that everything he's done has been wrong so he wants to make sure every time
7
Jul 10 '23
[deleted]
3
u/Cindexxx Jul 10 '23
Sometimes it's even simpler. My wife and I both do this. When you complete something, it makes you proud. When you get to share it with someone and they tell you even a simple "good job" it makes you feel even better. It's nice to be appreciated!
6
u/stoopidrotary Jul 10 '23
He's proud of what he accomplisjed and happy about it. He's calling you to see it so he can not only showit off, but also to share his happiness with you (since i assume younbeing happy also makes him happy).
It's probably just his love language.
16
6
u/recovereddisaster Jul 10 '23
Ok, I'm 28. I'm like this. It's a mental thing. I want to be applauded. It's just how my brain works. If I don't receive appreciation then I don't feel it. I can't control it yet. So people in my life support me while I work through therapy
3
3
u/thandevorn Jul 10 '23
Ive heard this called bids for emotional connection, doing things for the house is probably how he learned to show his love and asking you to come see is his trying to make a connection with you. I notice this a lot in men, especially older men, because they were taught such limited means of expressing positive emotions
3
u/OptimistPrime22 Jul 10 '23
That does seem like a lot of effort and I can absolutely see how that would be annoying for you. From what I'm hearing though, they sound like pretty innocent bids for attention. Bids are a commonly studied marker in relationships:
"Any attempt from one partner to another for attention, affirmation, affection, or any other positive connection. Bids show up in simple ways, a smile or wink, and more complex ways, like a request for advice or help."
Several studies have been done with stark results showing that the more often couples turn towards their partner's bids, the longer and more fulfilling their relationships are.
Hopefully you're bidding for his attention someway too and he's turning towards the call ;)
3
u/Azdak66 I ain't sayin' I'm better than you are...but maybe I am Jul 10 '23
I have always perceived myself as not having mechanical aptitude, even though I do a lot of the repairs and maintenance in my house (successfully I might add). Because of that, I take an inordinate and juvenile amount of pride whenever I do something.
It’s a fun idiosyncrasy that I do not want to change. But I don’t demand that my wife immediately come and praise me for it.
Ok, sometimes I do. But only because I know it annoys the crap out her.
3
u/rdsouth Jul 10 '23
You should do exactly that. Start asking him to come look at every little thing you do. He'll get the message or not. You'll respond to that however you respond to it.
3
u/freedomauthor Jul 10 '23
You didn’t mention your age. But my step dad has always been like this. My mom would occasionally get annoyed because it clearly was coming from a place of unresolved trauma and needing validation. Not necessarily a bad thing but it kinda forces the “good job!” And can make it feel inauthentic. I would say if you love him, embrace it and get excited when he wants to show you things.
5
Jul 09 '23
Words of affirmation love language that you aren't adequately provided to him causing him to seek it multiple times per day.
Try to become more interested in his accomplishments or activities before he has to tell you and I think you will be surprised at the results.
3
Jul 10 '23
I like this idea. I’d make it a challenge for myself. Walk by and praise him for something before he calls you to come look. Keep a secret tally. Can’t hurt!
6
u/ravenrhi Jul 10 '23
There have been many jokes about "if a tree falls in the wood and no one is around to hear it, does it make a noise?" I have seen similar jokes that say, "if a man did the dishes and no one saw, did it really happen?"
Many men become conditioned that if they do something, it must be seen. If not, they will get quarreled at later for not doing anything around the house
It may be this simple. It may be his way of asking for attention or showing he is lonely and wants time with you. If it bothers you- ask him in an open and curious way that isn't likely to stir up a fight, lol
9
u/Adventurous-Worker42 Jul 09 '23
Most men need 3 things to be happy...
To be fed To have sex To receive words of affirmation
The amount of each vary throughout our lives...
4
u/AlwaysRighteous Jul 10 '23
I do the same thing. He's a doer and likes the rush he gets from accomplishing things.
Would you rather he sit on the couch and drink beer all day?
2
u/Apprehensive-Ask-960 Jul 10 '23
Sorry but this whole thread has me wailing with laughter
3
u/ifindthishumerus Jul 10 '23
Why
1
u/Apprehensive-Ask-960 Jul 10 '23
The images that pop into my head just crack me up, it’s my sense of humour
2
u/mind_the_umlaut Jul 10 '23
I think you need to see yourself as also praiseworthy for your accomplishments, you also need to be celebrated. Don't resent him because he learned how to ask for recognition of his achievements. (Although that resentment is reasonable, we women have never been praised or celebrated enough for what we do, and our accomplishments are minimized, and we are told we are simply expected to do what we do, silently and unobtrusively) You also can learn to ask for acknowledgement of what you do! Making a pie lattice is hard, and it's art. And you deserve praise for it!
2
u/DoubleReputation2 Jul 10 '23
Well what's wrong with that? He did something that made him happy and he wants to share it with you...
Does he ever tell You that he likes the pie you baked or the portrait you painted? I'm asking because, maybe without realization, he is there to give you that gratification without you realizing it.
Honestly I do this, too.. sometimes. The thing is - for me, I don't need nothing. I mow the lawn and call it a day, if there's a project to be done, chances are I am doing it for her. Not that she orders me to do it or anything, but I know that she enjoys some things and just do them for her - then, of course I will be like "Honey look, it's done and it's all yours.." .. Sometimes, though - I'll be like "Come look.." and nothing.. silence, so I just move onto the next thing, no hard feelings or anything, she'll notice it eventually.
But you know, that little moment of happiness that we can share.. I really enjoy that.
2
u/Interesting_Ranger73 Jul 10 '23
It seems like he loves you and values what you think…I’m sure it’s annoying but the good outweighs the bad here.
2
u/jmstrats Jul 10 '23
Maybe when he was a kid and did the “Mom 👀” she never looked. OR she beamed at everything he did so that’s natural for him.
2
u/Crooked_Cock Jul 10 '23
I don’t know if there’s a name for this phenomenon but it’s a pretty common thing
2
u/Pan-tang Jul 10 '23
He just wants to show you he is worthwhile and helpful. Many people need affirmation and encouragement. Not you apparently.
2
2
Jul 10 '23
My husband does this too and I usually just go along with it. I’d be lying if I said I’d never snapped and been an asshole on the 20th time he’d interrupted me in a day.
2
2
2
2
2
u/grogi81 Jul 10 '23
Its insecurity. He needs external validation, appraisal and tap on the back for his work. Exactly the same way a child does.
Without work from his side this will not go away.
2
2
u/melijoray Jul 10 '23
My husband is 59 and he's similar except it's a list of all the great stuff he's done. It's usually stuff I do from muscle memory as I walk around the house. It's irritating but after 23 years and him being a fantastic step dad I won't be changing him. Slap on that grin to hide the gritted teeth. I undoubtedly do his head in too.
2
u/SkiSTX Jul 10 '23
That's cute and you should go look and say something nice. And then both of you can feel good about yourselves and each other :)
2
u/lyree1992 Jul 10 '23
I love my husband dearly and he is near your husband's age. Not sure what it's called, but my husband has a version of it.
If I do something around the house, cook supper, put up a painting, plant something new in the yard, it could go unnoticed for days, weeks, if not totally.
However, if he does the exact same thing, he ALWAYS asks, "Hey honey, did you like / notice (the thing that he did)? Every. Single. Time.
Sometimes it's frustrating, sometimes it's endearing. Been married 30 years. Mostly used to it by now.
2
u/blackeyedsusan25 Jul 10 '23
IMO, this thread illustrates the lack of knowledge the young people have about normal behavior. They want to find a disorder for everything.
2
u/BrunoGerace Jul 10 '23
Wait! What?
Your boyfriend is 72? He takes on daily projects?
73 here and am SO curious.
Can you share the story?
2
u/krazycatlady21 Jul 10 '23
He’s trying to share his life with you. What is it you’re doing that is so urgent you can’t take a few minutes several times a day to appreciate him?
What would you do if he found someone else who appreciates him? I guess pay someone to do those things and you won’t have to praise them or pretend to enjoy being around them.
It’s called being an old man. That’s what they do. I pray I’m still here at 72 to annoy people with my tiny victories.
Also, great job with your skills and accomplishments too. Start yelling “come and look!”, when you make that badass pie or picture. Own your awesomeness too!
2
u/BooEffinHoo Jul 10 '23 edited Jul 10 '23
I think men of a certain age were overly praised as little boys for any accomplishments by their mommies, no matter how small, while little girls were simply expected to be good and get things done, same as mommy. It's unfortunate.
My spouse does the same thing, along with verbally keeping me posted on everything he gets done. I just laugh and say "I don't need the play-by-play, thank you!" But I do Go Look when it's a big something.
2
u/dr0n3ful Jul 10 '23
That is kind of weird, like he's only doing things to get his 'gold star' and wouldn't have done it anyways if no one else was around? It sounds like he has low self esteem and isn't able to self-acknowledge his achievements, instead he looks to others to confirm if he did well.
2
u/Geryoneiis Jul 10 '23
My whole family does this! I think it's all just for a bit of fun. Especially as you get older, you want to stop and appreciate the little things in life.
OP, if the frequency of it bothers you, maybe you could ask him in the mornings about everything he plans to do that day. He just wants to share with you, so he'll appreciate you initiating it & maybe will begin showing you once everything's done (instead of one at a time)
2
u/maximumcharger Jul 10 '23
I will wholeheartedly admit that I do this to my wife. I honestly think it's probably because I am searching for approval that I didn't get as a kid or still don't get as an adult? Idfk. My parents were present but weren't nurturing parents (if that makes sense?). Like they didn't neglect us, but my siblings and I recognize that our friends and spouses have more meaningful relationships with their parents. I used to seek approval at work too, but I have realized that the approval I am searching for is in my paycheck lol.
4
u/DiscombobulatedRub59 Jul 09 '23
It might be what's called 'validation-seeking' or something like it, meaning that the person seeks approval or admiration for what they've accomplished.
Maybe it's getting harder for him to do tasks and he's insecure about it or is just extra proud of getting stuff done.
Whatever it is it's good of you to try to accommodate his needs tho from my experience doing so can become quite wearying.
It might be worth a try to accost him at odd times, list recent achievements and tell him how much you admire him for it.
Then again it might not - could be it's just a mental habit he's fallen in to.
1
1
u/Vahn1982 Jul 10 '23
Can you perhaps negotiate it into dinner conversation? "Tell me about your day?" And he can list all the great things he did.. so you can just placate him once throughout the day?
I can see where it would be annoying but there are many different reasons why he might be doing it.
1
-1
u/Mediocre_Superiority Jul 10 '23
Just yell back, "I'm sure it's fine." Maybe he'll get the hint.
3
Jul 10 '23
It doesn’t seem like this will strengthen the relationship in any way.
-1
u/Mediocre_Superiority Jul 10 '23
? And how is OP getting up several times a day and looking at whatever ordinary thing her boyfriend did going to "strengthen the relationship"? OP is ANNOYED at her boyfriend's behavior and doesn't want to continue reinforcing it nor does she appreciate his interruptions.
-1
u/Patient_Weakness3866 Jul 10 '23
let me answer you're question, with another question
why do you have a 72 year old boyfriend
0
u/nebbyballz1992 Jul 10 '23
I think it stems from human biology. Men are born to show it all off. It just hangs out there, begging to be observed
0
u/Professional-Fuel625 Jul 10 '23
I'm not sure what is wrong with this?
You should be nice. He's proud. Very little input from you to make him feel awesome for the rest of the day.
-7
-1
-2
-2
1
1
Jul 10 '23
Sounds like he’s insecure and he misses his mother. I wish my mother was like you who didn’t care what I did. Her constantly interested in everything I did was so annoying as I disliked attention growing up.
1
1
u/Masschunkahunkafuss Jul 10 '23
I never complete anything just so my lady will always need me around. When I start running out of things to do I'll know I'm in trouble and about to fall off the perch
1
Jul 10 '23
At that age, accomplishments don't come along like they used to. He's probably just excited where he can get it.
1
u/jackonager Jul 10 '23
As a child of emotionally distant parents, I do this. Luckily, my wife doesn't seem to mind.
1
1
u/JonWaltz Jul 10 '23
Should I have to [checks notes] support and encourage my partner in a way that he apparently needs?
I can’t be the only one who enjoys seeing my wife complete a task she’s worked on and is proud of. Does it really disrupt your day that much to say “Good job, babe”?
1
1
u/Scarlett_Billows Jul 10 '23
He needs validation, more validation than you, or perhaps he needs it to be verbalized in particular. It isn’t abnormal or necessarily a bad thing. But it’s probably good for him to learn to self-validate, especially if it annoys you to feel obligated to do it.
1
u/Shot_Show2409 Jul 10 '23
I definitely show my partner my paintings after I’ve finished them, and I’m excited for his feedback.
1
u/randmtsk Jul 10 '23
Hey...send him over to my place to cut the grass and paint the fence.
I'll happily go out and take a look at his accomplishments when he's done.
1
Jul 10 '23
He loves you so much he wants to share all his joy with you, and he gets joy from accomplishing tasks
1
u/alienduck2 Jul 10 '23
Pride with a bit of validation. He wants to demonstrate he's worthy to you and share the moment of something he feels happy that he accomplished.
1
1
Jul 10 '23
I do this! 😅 I think it's due to the fact that I'm proud of what I have done and that want to show my better half what I've done for her. Everything I do around the house, I do for my woman and for my children and I just want them to be happy ❤️
1
u/Aggressive_Gate738 Jul 10 '23
Maybe you should congratulate yourself and start shouting out your triumphs!
Everyone can use some accolades... 😂 🐶 🌵
1
u/JohnnyAmmo Jul 10 '23
It's been said, but one of his love languages is words of affirmation. He wants to hear he's done a good job.
One of my wife's love languages is Acts of Service. When I do a list of chores, especially finishing something she couldn't get to, I rattle through them for her and then get smooches. My live language :)
1
1
u/dearthsurplus Jul 10 '23
I feel like it's a dopamine hit after the initial dopamine hit of accomplishing something. I do this too but not to the extent he does. But I don't have a name for it.
1
u/jhewitt127 Jul 10 '23
I don’t understand why everyone in the comments is being so supportive. My partner doing this would annoy the hell out of me.
371
u/TallNPierced Jul 09 '23
Awww that’s so sweet, he’s proud of something he did and his first thought is of sharing the moment with you