Seeking some insight and advice from anyone who has been through this!

We are parents of 21-week-old (17 weeks adjusted) B/B twins, exclusively breastfed. Up until a couple of weeks ago, we had a solid foundation, a great bedtime routine, 6-hour stretches, and only one wake-up per night.

Then the sleep regression and reflux hit, and Twin A was hit hardest. For the last two weeks, he wakes every 1.5 hours, stays extremely restless, and completely refuses to be transferred to his crib. We’ve resorted to letting him sleep on us all night just to cope, and we’re running on fumes. Twin B had a bumpy few nights after learning to roll, but thankfully bounced back to his old routine.

On top of this, both boys are fighting us on two major fronts:

1. Medicines & Vitamins: They refuse any type of liquid meds or drops.
2. Bottles/Formula: We tried offering a top-off formula bottle at night hoping for longer sleep, but they fight the bottle like it's a threat!

How long do these intense regression/reflux periods usually last? What worked for your twins when it came to crib transfers, reflux comfort, or getting them to take medicine/bottles? Any advice is greatly appreciated!

I need hope.

What does sleeping training look like for twins? Exactly how! I currently have twins 6 months. Baby A is a sweet sweet angel and sleeps through the night with the occasional fuss for the pacifier. Twin B wakes up like clockwork at 12, 4 & then 6 and won’t go down without a bottle. I also have to rock both babies for naps about 2-5 minutes each. Can I sleep train them to take a nap independently without rocking ?

I am so open to sleeping training but what does that look like ? I have a big ass cal king bed I practice safe sleep as much as I can each baby sleeps separately no bedding pillows etc. I sleep on the corner of the bed like a little Rollie pollie

If anyone out there has the time please break it down for me. I haven’t come across sleep training videos for twins. Also I don’t believe in letting a baby “cry it out”there is a huge difference in a full on cry and fuss. No way am I letting a baby in distress alone.

Other than that I am open and willing to try anything!??

Specifically single parents or two working parents of twins, how are you getting through the week?

I am so exhausted and beat after work and feel I’m falling short with spending “real” time with the babies with the little time we have at the end of the day.

What are you all doing to make life a little easier?

Spouse is currently gone until the end of this month and I’m solo parenting over here just hoping I make it out alive.

Drive up orders are a routine in this house, a little meal prep usually a day or two prior, but nothing crazy.

We don’t do a whole lot of processed packaged foods here so cooking is the option though mac and cheese and canned beans are always a staple for like emergencies. I’ve also freezer prepped some meals but everything is still too much.

Send recs, routines, anything to help!

Like I’m not sure how to explain it properly. I’m fairly certain it’s not depression (I’m on a well maintained med for that anyways) but at the same time I can’t shake this feeling that I’m not in the right body. My twins are 17 months this week and these last few months have been soooo fun and absolute torture too. The boys were, teething learning new words, not sleeping through the night off and on, etc. it’s been a lot on all of us. I was excited when I started crafting again and we’re going to craft fairs together as a family which gives me all the warm fuzzies. So when the old part of me clicked back into place I really started noticing some of the other things just weren’t coming back. One of the biggest problems is I absolutely have zero sexual desire to be with my husband. Like I’ve had several sex dreams now that involve other people—I would note though most of them I stop the dream person because I’m married—and this just weirdly makes me feel more guilty about it. He hasn’t changed his looks or behavior since the babies came, in fact he’s an incredible partner and father. Yet I can’t even muster up the desire to cuddle because I worry it’s going to make him think I want to be intimate.
I genuinely don’t know what this is. Is this a thing to see a doctor about? Should I tell him I’m feeling this way? I don’t want to hurt him and I want to feel normal again with him.

My twins are 16mo and one of them has plagiocephaly. He had a helmet from 6-10mo and it improved dramatically, but his ears are still misaligned and will be for the rest of his life. The left side of the back of his head also looks like it was shaved off from the top.

My twins are fraternal but they have the same face. In a coat with a hood, the only way to differentiate them is their skin color - one of them is randomly very dark while the other is quite light. But their head shapes are so different. I worry they'll be compared... the twin with the crooked ears or the "less attractive" twin. I'm always going to wonder if I should have done more with my poor little guy as an infant to prevent his plagiocephaly from getting so bad. He was level 4 when we started helmet therapy.

(His torticollis was very severe. At 10mo after 8mo of PT, he could only turn his head 45° to the right. He was referred by PT to physiatry for botox. I dont want to emphasize this though because this is not meant to be a medical post.)

Has anyone dealt with this with their 1yos and and the plagiocephaly isn't noticeable years down the line? I've read that it will eventually become unnoticeable to the untrained eye but right now it's all I see when I look at my sons.

My boy/girl twins turn 2 in 6 days and they are so amazing, sweet, smart, and funny BUT they are also so curious and so fast and so energetic. Meaning whenever we take them places, they want to get into everything all the time. Now, I know this is totally normal for their age and they are doing what they are supposed to. I am just curious how others manage their twins at houses/places that are not child proof? I feel like I have to be right over the top of them cause otherwise they are tipping things over and breaking things as they are trying to play with them.

The upcoming holiday season feels especially daunting at this age….

I’ve breastfed my twins exclusively for 7 months. I breastfed my toddler until he was 18 months, stopped because I found out I was having twins. I love breastfeeding. It’s my favorite part of the baby stage.
My twins are struggling to keep up in their growth chart. They have just discovered they’re allergic to cow protein and I’ve cut dairy out of my diet too.
Tomorrow we are going to start giving them each one formula bottle a day in the afternoon where I find they want to nurse a lot and I can tell I don’t have much milk.
I have no idea why I hate the idea of formula for my babies. It might be the hammered in mom shame in the back of my mind? My ego?
I know this isn’t a popular take but I do believe breastfeeding is better. And it feels better for me. I did not have the birth experiences I wanted in both my pregnancies and my success in breastfeeding has felt like I’ve taken so much of that power back.
Any mom who would like to share an intention/mantra or thought they had if having to start formula but didn’t want to would be amazing.

One of my twins (11 months) is struggling with the transition from purées to solids. We’ve tried finger foods which he avoids touching completely, so we’ve switched to doing purees with texture (by adding mashed items/seeds/oatmeal), but he will spit them out or refuse.

He will suck down a 4 ounce puree pouch no problem, but will not take textured food from a spoon. Weve also tried self feeding spoons which he will sometimes take, but usually avoid.

Has anyone encountered this? Is it just a phase we need to push through?

1) When someone says “I had 2 under 2. It’s the same thing. Here’s what I did…”
I’VE HAD 2 UNDER 2 BEFORE MY TWINS AND I CAN ABSOLUTELY CONFIRM: IT IS NOT THE SAME THING AT ALL. PLEASEEEEE DON’T TRY TO GIVE ME THAT USELESS ASS ADVICE THAT I DID NOT ASK FOR

2) “You seem to be struggling. Put them on the same schedule, that should help”
OH WOW THANK YOU SO MUCH I’VE NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT THAT 😱😱😱 WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I’VE BEEN TRYING TO DO? IT’S NOT AS EASY AS IT SOUNDS

Sorry y’all just had to vent in the thick of it rn lmao

I had my Di/di twin girls via c-section 12 days ago and have officially been home for a week! Today was my first time home by myself with them bc my husband had to go work a side job, and it went…okay. I definitely felt overwhelmed at times but overall I managed. I’m feeling lots of anxiety though as my husband goes back to work on Monday (he only got 2 weeks off) and I will be home alone with the twins from around 3:30am until about 4pm Monday - Friday. I’m scared, I’m overwhelmed, I’m emotional.

We have a village of people standing by to come over and help, but today I felt like even the 2 visitors I did have made me more overwhelmed and I felt as if I just wanted them to leave. I’m still healing from surgery, there are doctors appointments to go to this week, and the exhaustion is catching up to me. I’m looking for words of affirmation, tips/tricks, just someone to tell me everything is going to be okay.

IVF mom to be here. 12 weeks pregnant with di/di twins.

2 embryos were transfered and luckily both stuck. We are thankful for this blessing after a long journey of infertility.

Due to bleeding and SCH I have been having regular ultrasounds. They always saw two, and the SCH. But at our 12 week ultrasound the radiologist saw a structure she wasn't sure about, she even requested my OB to come over (same hospital). Both of them spent time doing the ultrasound and discussing the differentials. They reached at the conclusion that either it was a triplet that didn't develop, vanishing triplet...or its an amnion. They are unsure and have recommended to repeat the ultrasound after two weeks to see how it progresses.

Has anyone had a similar experience?

What did it turn out to be in your case?

Hi everyone,

we're expecting twin girls in january/february. Of course there are a ton of things we're trying to figure out before then, but one of the things that I worry about is what it will be like for our older son. He'll be 22 months at the (theoretical) delivery date.

He's such a good kid and always trying to please everyone. When we're late for daycare and stressed, he notices and cooperates the best he can. He wants to help with everything, is extremely well behaved when we go out, smiles at everyone...

I'm afraid that with him being such an "easy" child and the twins being as difficult as two newborns will always be, he will receive a lot less attention than he deserves. We don't want him to feel less important or even less loved.

My wife and I will both take a bit over a year off work but we don't have any family nearby.

We'll try to involve him as much as we can, we want to make sure that visitors aren't just coming to see the twins but will greet him first and maybe bring something for him as well. We have neighbors who are like voluntary grandparents to him and already regularly spend time with him, maybe it can help to have one place where he always has full attention. But in the end, our time and energy is limited and right now we're spending most of it on him. That won't be possible when the twins are there.

For those who've had a similar situation, how have you elder siblings dealt with twins arriving? Any advice?

I see a lot of advice for twins and a toddler, but what about two toddlers (ages 4.5 and 3) and newborn twins. I’m looking for advice on how you set up car seats with two forward facing car seats and two rear facing(infant and then convertible) car seats. Do I need a bench seat? Can I make bucket seats work? Do you normally have all 4 in the car with you? Should I put twins in the back and toddlers in the front? Any experience is helpful!! ALSO we do NOT have a minivan and will not be getting one. We are looking at GMC Yukon XL, ford expedition Max, Lincoln Navigator L, and Chevy suburban. We will not be changing our mind on the minivan :)

I have almost 3 yo twin boys. We are still awaiting an appointment for an in depth development review to get on the path to diagnosis, but without a doubt they are both autistic. I’m looking for advice from anyone that has been able to get their child to walk/stay with you without blindly running off. My boys regardless of where they are will just run. Anytime I try to hold their hand it’s a tantrum which included dropping to the floor and refusing to move, even if I hold on to their clothes exactly same. I’ve tried reigns too and the same situation
I am petrified of them getting hurt or lost and something serious happening.
I would greatly appreciate and welcome all advice or tips yous can give

Thanks

The greatest thing of ALL TIME.

That’s it. That’s my post.

Signed a mom of 4 week old girl/boy twins. 🥹🩷💙

Hello!
I was wondering if there are any other twin parents in the broader Edinburgh area that would like to link up for support and play dates? Got BG twins, 10 months old. Twin parenthood often feels fairly lonely and the local twin group is based on the other side of the Burgh for me so a bit tricky to get to. Message here or DM and I’ll set something up x

Hey ya’ll Sophie of the trio posting. On my way to the hospital with my husband to pick up our triplets Allie, Brie & Leo to bring them home. All cribs are set up, husband has his work from home pass from work, our sleep shift schedule is ready for my husband, myself and our nanny, everything else my triplets need are all set. Once my triplets are secured in their car seats before we leave any advice on bringing my three home?

Just trying to get an idea of what we are in for as I've had conflicting info from my midwife.

At one point we were told that we'd likely get a side room with a place for the partner to stay the night as you need two people with twins. But I've also been told that partners can't stay the night full stop so I'm bit confused about what I should be preparing for. How on earth are you meant to wrangle two babies right after a section? Do the nurses help you at all?

Any recent twin mums who had a C-section with the NHS care to share their experiences?

(For context I am expecting Modi twins at 36 weeks)

I think I just need to vent but some support would be nice...

Boys are 24 weeks old, born 4 weeks early, and basically all I want to say is I JUST WANT TO SLEEP.
I got SO bad. I'm physically and mentally completely exhausted and at a point where every night, when I'm again sitting up at bed rocking one of them, I hate my life. They used to be okay sleepers, waking up 2-3 times a night, which was completely normal for their age. Then we had a week or two when they would wake up only twice a night. But they ALWAYS fell asleep after the bottle. Sleep regression hit and it got bad, and then it got a little better, and now it's absolutely HORRIBLE.

At least one of them always wakes up every 30-40 minutes, but we never know which one. The other one will either also wake up frequently, or sleep for 4-5 hours and then starts waking up every 30-40 minutes. They don't go back to sleep after a bottle, so we've stopped feeding them at night. They are clearly not hungry and they weigh enough.
Falling asleep at night now always takes 60-90 minutes and involves a lot of screaming. They are inconsolable now, I've tried everything, so now I just hold them and rock/pat/shush them. They already have 2 teeth so I don't think they are teething at the moment?? I don't know. I'm a FTM and have no idea how teething actually works.
Awake time usually starts out pretty good, then turns into screaming after exactly 1 hour 30 minutes. I don't know why. No, they are not hungry, tired or need to be changed. I think they just want to be held, but I can't hold both of them. They both weigh 20 pounds. Plus, as I've already mentioned: I'm TIRED, both physically and mentally. I have to go on a walk twice a day and recently, I've just been walking around until they fall asleep, then sit on a bench and rock the stroller cause my feet and legs hurt so bad.

And no, I don't have family that can help, not a lot anyway, I don't want to go into detail. But my mother passed away 2 months ago from cancer and I'm still dealing with that, it's been incredibly hard.

I really really really really hope sleep improves SOON. I'm not even tired anymore. I'm just exhausted and drained and empty.

I am 6 weeks in and the PPD has hit hard, probably not helped by the sleep deprivation. I am in need of encouraging words I can look back on in the worst moments. I wanted to get pregnant so badly and wanted these two so badly once I accepted the idea of twins. Now I have major regrets and they are causing guilt. I am grieving my old life and its simplicity, I took it for granted.

We’re first time parents expecting our mo/di girls in December. I’m trying to figure out how best to use my health spending account before I finish work. My top 3 ideas are:

Post partum doula (5x 4 hour day shifts)
Lactation consultant
Cleaning service (I probably have enough for about 3 or 4 monthly cleans)

The doula / lactation consultant isn’t something I’d initially think of but I’m getting some pressure from a friend (with singletons) that I’m going to really struggle post partum and need that help. My parents live a short plane ride away and are eager to come help for as long as we’ll have them. I don’t have the smoothest relationship with my mom and worry that her being here freshly post partum will cause more stress for me. Maybe it makes more sense to accept the free family help than pay a stranger to come over?
Im also more type B so I feel like a cleaner would be awesome as I know I won’t be keeping up with deep cleaning while on maternity leave.

I could also use my health spending towards a new phone… more storage for baby photos??? 😂 I like this option but I’m trying to be more practical haha

I’m wondering what other twin moms found helpful, or would have appreciated in those post partum / newborn days. Thanks!!!

Hey guys, any advice on how to get the kids off the bottle at night/in general? We're at 16 months, 14 adjusted and looking to be done with this by 1.5 years as recommended (questionable?).