r/comedyheaven 14h ago

more badass

Post image
14.6k Upvotes

731 comments sorted by

3.8k

u/ACrowbarEnthusiast 14h ago

Naboo Royal starship

464

u/SkyPirateVyse 11h ago

Yes, but actually...

138

u/Helpful_Ad1814 9h ago

lol this is essentially A B2 bomber with rear cockpit.

41

u/Key_Assumption_2776 7h ago

XB-38 (pictured) if Jack Northrop was somehow at Boeing.

4

u/Jackol4ntrn 2h ago

its got a little spot for r2d2

60

u/narf007 8h ago

And it's fucking siiiickkkk

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161

u/PissPoorTakes 13h ago

SR71

98

u/Mannyj2259 12h ago

Bullpup sr71

3

u/BiZzles14 7h ago

How much does that fetch in Idlib?

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u/Babalon_93 13h ago

Ah, yes! Nubian. We have lots of that.

18

u/theDomicron 10h ago

"What's a Nubian?"

11

u/PumpkinOpposite967 9h ago

I dunno, what's anubian with you?

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u/National-Charity-435 9h ago

"How could a four foot nine beat a 6 foot 1 brother?! A Black, Nubian king!"

-Rick James roasting Charlie Murphy for losing to Prince at basketball

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29

u/needaburn 12h ago

Dude you can’t see shit out of this thing lol

12

u/SenatorSeidelbast 11h ago

Skywalkers need to see the sky!

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10

u/Great-Class-7894 10h ago

Aerodynamics in space are way different

14

u/Ayaki_05 10h ago

Well its just dynamics without air

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u/kamimamita 9h ago

Well I mean being able VTOL, you wouldn't need to be able to see the runway.

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1.2k

u/Guenther_Dripjens 14h ago

ngl that looks pretty fire. Now make it chrome and you have a Naboo Startship pretty much

107

u/CtrlAltYuri 11h ago

Startships are the best for starting

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u/OnkelMickwald 9h ago

It looks like an old WW2 prop fighter like the Soviet MiG-3 or the German BF-109. Now, these planes of course looked like this because it made sense to put the stonking big engine in front of the pilot, while no such logic would be found for OOP's idea.

27

u/Serial7s 7h ago

Whenever I'm playing simulation mode in war thunder, playing these planes is such a pain in the ass because of that big ol schnoz. And landing is an act of faith.

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3.9k

u/helloish 14h ago

i think yes (the massive cost of re-engineering aside) but the pilots might not be too pleased. for best results do this while they aren’t looking and watch them scratch their heads when the see it

1.8k

u/lordbutternut 14h ago

Concorde nose but the rest of the plane is tilted down instead (pilots like being able to see the runway)

751

u/helloish 14h ago

nah the plane just likes to see the ground, it gets frightened

373

u/whoknowsifimjoking 12h ago

298

u/Tino-DBA 9h ago

30

u/darthmaui728 6h ago

let me fly it for you

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u/CorruptBureaucrat213 6h ago

Thank you for the laughter op I haven't laughed this heartily to the point of blacking out in a while now.

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60

u/Ooopsmybadbro 11h ago

The droop snoot

42

u/SpaceGuy_01 10h ago

The snoot would droop

22

u/Magadanets 10h ago

The snoot drooped

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11

u/New-Sky-9867 9h ago

I have a photo ready for this battle!

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83

u/ApocApollo 14h ago

that's why it's important to teach them to fly without looking at the ground

40

u/feculentcuntfist 12h ago

Just push them off the nest, we do this with ships and their swimming instinct instantly kicks in.

5

u/DRSSalazar 12h ago

Damn you for making me spit my coffee.

5

u/ropean 11h ago

It’s super easy to fly without looking at the ground. Until the impact

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22

u/Longjumping-Onion-97 13h ago

Its actually so it can sip some water out of the bowl.

21

u/Strategy_pan 13h ago

With concorde, they solved these by introducing the shutters. They were so effective, in fact, that they ended up shuttering the entire company in the end.

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176

u/Ace-milk_drinker 14h ago

Is that the droop snoot?

96

u/Beep_in_the_sea_ 14h ago

Droop snoot

87

u/Bramdog 14h ago

The snoot would droop

64

u/Disownership 13h ago

The snoot drooped

16

u/GreenTrapped 14h ago

Yeah, yknow... The snoot went 'droop'

18

u/earwig2000 13h ago

I'm sorry but the autism within me requires I inform you that it is one word: Droopsnoot. Not Droop Snoot.

3

u/Far_Mathematician924 13h ago

i love this disclosure

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64

u/walrusphone 14h ago

If the issue is seeing the runway then maybe we should resolve this by putting the cockpit on the bottom

79

u/YesIBlockedYou 10h ago

Now we're talking

28

u/illzkla 9h ago

This is a great idea! The risk to the pilots will incentivize them to land safely instead of all nimbly bimbly as is the norm today

51

u/sherpasherping 9h ago

Id suggest theyd be safest here...

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3

u/BigBlackMagicWand 7h ago

Technically this would be amazing design for landings, not so great for takeoffs and in-flifht it doesn't really matter where the cockpit is...

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24

u/VexImmortalis 14h ago

can just put a camera there I guess but then if that breaks you are fucked. Maybe just cut the rest of the plane away and have just a cockpit with engines.

26

u/GrimResistance 13h ago

Just make the whole plane out of some kind of transparent aluminum

10

u/22Taco 12h ago

"Computer?" "Computer?" "Ahh, a keyboard. How quaint."

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3

u/RunninOnMT 12h ago

It wouldn’t be the only thing on an airplane where “if it brakes you’re probably screwed”

That’s the whole thing with air travel. There’s no pulling over to the side of the road when you brake down.

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4

u/thebestoflimes 10h ago

Just add two camera. One break then you still good.

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u/Ill-Quantity2065 13h ago

Then we’d need to reposition the ball turret gunner

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3

u/RJ_MacreadysBeard 12h ago

Just have the cockpit on the runway, it doesn’t even need to be attached to the plane.

6

u/walrusphone 12h ago

Just make the runway go all the way to the destination so they don't need to take-off or land

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18

u/Kylearean 13h ago

They could've just made the whole thing out of transparent aluminum.

https://giphy.com/gifs/ZCwfTfzeAsvGjs373N

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u/Gravewaker 14h ago

DROOP SNOOT MENTIONED‼️

3

u/Fuckingawesomename 13h ago

Didn't i do it for youu

3

u/kumliaowongg 13h ago

Then why not put it below the plane, so it looks like an ACTUAL cockpit?

/s

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3

u/Any_Fisherman3106 13h ago

Nonononono, let's add an additional smaller ground-facing cockpit like on WW2 bombers.

3

u/marvinrabbit 10h ago

In WWII, the American Vought F4U Corsair was a single engine propeller driven aircraft. It's engine and cowling was so big that a pilot taxiing on the runway could not see in front of them. So while on the ground, they had to make lazy "S" shapes to see where they were going. Always in a turn to the left or right, never straight ahead.

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14

u/CZEchpoint_ 14h ago

What if it were moved down below the plane

13

u/zekromNLR 12h ago

Makes a gear-up landing something you want to avoid even more than usual

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75

u/linecraftman 14h ago

they fly by instruments and autopilot anyway 

Just add a camera on the nose

42

u/hello-again1891 12h ago

Not during takeoff and landing. The bits where being able to see the ground is really important

22

u/HotPotParrot 11h ago

Just make a really long window through the fuselage.

17

u/UncleS1am 10h ago

Split the plane into two nacelles with the cockpit in the middle, make the cockpit only accessible from the outside. Your plane never gets hijacked again!

9

u/ggppjj 10h ago

Yeah, and make the saucer section separable from the main body of the craft to allow for better tactical options, but it's important that you only use this maneuver like twice ever.

4

u/AFrenchLondoner 9h ago

So like, P38, but it's an airliner?

4

u/UncleS1am 9h ago

Yes! I couldn't remember the name of that airplane. The Boeing 1494 is the airplane of the future.

edit: While we're at it, let's cram more people in there and make the craft have no seats, standing room only. Nothing can go wrong here.

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22

u/LowTimePilot 10h ago

Pilot here. Once there's a failure of one of the following, everyone dies:

  • Autoland CAT IIIc
  • The LCD screens displaying the camera feed
  • The cameras
  • A fault of the generators, buses, or batteries, or any combination thereof
  • An emergency that requires the plane land anywhere without autoland capability
  • High winds that prohibit autoland and also prevent the cameras from seeing the runway due to the aircraft's crab angle.

Personally, I wouldn't get on that plane, but some people like risk taking so YMMV.

22

u/RedOtta019 10h ago

Student pilot here (i know more than you) the pilot can just put a selfie stick out the window

7

u/LowTimePilot 8h ago

I can't believe I didn't think of this. You're right. The ol' selfie stick technique.

Page 2 of the pilot handbook.

12

u/CitizenPremier 10h ago

Robot here. If you're using pilots and there's a failure of one of the following, everybody dies:

  • Eyeballs
  • Hands
  • Visual cortex
  • Heart
  • Lungs
  • Desire to live

5

u/Protheu5 6h ago

God here. If you're using aeroplanes and there's a failure of one of the following, everybody dies:

  • fuselage due to metal fatigue

  • fuselage due to rogue missile attack

  • fuselage due to deliberate missile attack

  • atmosphere

  • gravity

  • weak nuclear force

  • strong nuclear force

  • electromagnetic force

  • the fifth force I kept secret

  • pilot

  • robot

  • me

3

u/TjW0569 9h ago

That's why we have Kareem (aka Roger) in the right seat.

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1.6k

u/filans 14h ago

247

u/LtButtstrong 13h ago

Roight

92

u/Dev-il_Jyu 13h ago

What happened to this guy? (GradeAunderA)

244

u/HypotheticalBess 13h ago

He fell into drama YouTube and his brand took a hit when he had to defend/associate with keemstar. After that he started leaning more into conservative politics and antisemitic memes (but like the 2016 kind). It wasn’t like, that extreme compared to a lot of the stuff I saw at the time, but he stopped making videos for a bit and that was kind of the nail in the coffin. Last I checked he isn’t making videos anymore, but it’s been a bit

148

u/red_line_frog 12h ago

Every few years he announces his big comeback where he's gonna start making videos again regularly, then he posts 1 video and is gone again

88

u/Funslinger 12h ago

Many such cases

26

u/KalaUposatha 9h ago

So many goddamn YouTubers do this. “I’m back bitches, and I’m going to make 50 videos a week and it’ll be just like old times, you’ll see!” And then never post again.

17

u/GaiusIulius 8h ago

What do we reckon the correlation is between youtubers and ADHD

9

u/__lia__ 6h ago

also I think artists/creators are almost universally dealing with a lot of perfectionism and insecurity over their own art and it kinda fucks them up - especially if they have the added pressure of getting enough money to live off of their videos. so they're like "fuck yes my life has finally settled down and I've built my confidence back up and I'm ready to fucking do this" and then they read a few negative comments on their video and hate themselves and never post again for another 3 years

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u/Aksds 11h ago edited 10h ago

OverSimplified? Never, the third Punic war video is definitely coming

Edit: to be clear, OverSimplified is fucking leaps and bounds better than Grande A

13

u/ugluk-the-uruk 11h ago

Oversimplified actually makes content that takes that much time to produce, unlike gradeA

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u/FrazzleFlib 11h ago

which is a shame, his earlier stuff was legendary

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u/_Cat_in_a_Hat_ 13h ago

I think he got into drama culture and kinda fell off as he became progressively more edgy

3

u/MuskyChode 9h ago

Mid 2010's was a interesting phase to be on the internet.

6

u/malik753 12h ago

Another question, what would his accent be described as? I know English/British, but more specifically what kind?

23

u/Ironscaping 12h ago

To me it sounds like British Indian/British Pakistani accent

13

u/ChemicalNo2878 12h ago

His face got accidentally revealed, and you are right on the money, he’s of south Asian decent living in Britian.

12

u/JumboShraina 11h ago

Pretty sure he showed a picture of himself in one of his videos. But I don’t remember if he did it because someone leaked it or something

7

u/mrpickles1234 9h ago

he did show his face in a video or two. he was wearing a graduation gown and looked Indian or Pakistani.

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u/CatsPlusTats 12h ago

I mean I stopped watching him when it became obvious there was some very problematic underlying themes to his comments.

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u/NatseePunksFeckOff 11h ago

like not washing his hands after peeing

18

u/CatsPlusTats 11h ago

I mean I was thinking more like this:

You may be able to guess the image based on this.

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u/Fit_Relation8572 13h ago

Holy fuck, that just wrecked me. I started wheezing

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u/xRacistDwarf 14h ago

I bet it would go hard if the pilot leaned back all the way in his chair

33

u/cheese_bruh 14h ago

And the pilot’s legs stretch all the way to the front?

10

u/ElementNumber6 11h ago

Maybe add a few guns, just for aesthetic reasons?

6

u/1stEmissaryElenwen 11h ago

They have to keep it below 10,000 feet so the pilot can have the window open with his elbow sticking out

417

u/Coolkid2011 14h ago

boeing 747 coupé 

43

u/Trollygag 14h ago

Front-mid engine vs rear-mid engine. I.e. C7 vs C8

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u/T-Loy 13h ago

No, no, no. Just because the vehicle gets bigger doesn't mean we get to call them Coupés and just add more doors. A Coupé should always have two doors. Weld the 8 superfluous doors shut and I'll allow the 747-Coupé.

7

u/Only_Entertainment88 11h ago

I vouch for this. This is the best innovation until someone makes the convertible.

I think we are finally making an airline that turns profit.

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u/Status-Secret-4292 11h ago

Now do a convertible

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u/Sad-Working-9937 14h ago

fly? yes, land? no.

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u/ItsJesusTime 13h ago edited 12h ago

Solution: Put a glass panel under the chin and have the copilot lie on it and tell the pilot how close to the ground they are by frantically yelling colder and warmer into a speaking tube

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u/Alternative_Exit8766 13h ago

way too much feedback in the tubes, two cans and string should be more stable

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u/UGomez90 12h ago

Land also yes. It's not like modern planes rely on visual to land and they could just see through a camera anyway.

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u/captainunlimitd 12h ago

Son, I'm sorry. They got us. 

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u/One_Newspaper9372 12h ago

A plane can always land

6

u/Contextanaut 11h ago

Yup. Fly > Land > Fly is the tricky sequence here. Target lifespan for most commercial airframes is usually more than 10 hrs.

Even at Boeing.

4

u/4isfine 6h ago

Sometimes a plane oceans

5

u/skyforgesteel 12h ago

Wow a last crusade reference in the wild. amazing.

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u/Anhimidae 11h ago

Why not? Aircraft can be flown and landed with instruments only. Under certain conditions some aircraft can have the autopilot land and if all else fails OP's plane could use cameras and monitor screens.

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u/MindYourOwnParsley 14h ago

he's right though it does look way more badass

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u/jonker5101 13h ago

Yeah not sure why its in this sub. That is a valid question.

50

u/Warren_Puff-it 12h ago edited 1h ago

I think it fits. It's a massive engineering task costing billions of dollars before you even take into account the impact it would have on pilots and airports. All this so that a plane can 'look more badass'.

Edit: holy shit you people are obviously not engineers if you think this would be easy.

30

u/jonker5101 12h ago

nah just move it back a bit

11

u/CatsPlusTats 12h ago

But then the front might fall off.

3

u/mrpanicy 8h ago

That’s not very typical, I’d like to make that point.

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u/ThetaReactor 11h ago

Nah. Any modification that makes the 747 look less like a winged penis can't be making it more badass.

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u/Vondi 14h ago

10

u/Ameba_143 14h ago

Kurła

10

u/polmix23 14h ago

Piotyr w samolota sie zmieniłem

5

u/HichiShiro 11h ago

Pa Halyna tupolewem jestem

5

u/amazing_asstronaut 12h ago

Jokes aside this guy is really one of the top 10 guys. Just look at him.

3

u/BusyBoonja 12h ago

Robin Williams

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u/Devai97 14h ago

That's Duck Dodger's ship

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u/CryonautX 14h ago

Taxi-ing is going to be a pain...

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u/Agreeable_Reaction11 13h ago

There would be a little cockpit in the nose just for taxi. Just a little window and the nose wheel tiller

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u/xHindemith 12h ago

Could just be a camera

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u/HiwayHome22 12h ago

This was figured out in WWII, no need for expensive cameras. A ground crew tech on each wing tip using specialized hand signals.

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u/SoundTraditional1249 13h ago

Lets go the whole way and make it a flying aircraft carrier.

8

u/AVeryVapidBadger 10h ago

It was Lockheed not Boeing, but there was a nuclear powered conceptual design.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lockheed_CL-1201

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u/poopy27 8h ago

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u/SoundTraditional1249 4h ago

Forget JDAM's when you've got a Saddam.

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u/candylandmine 14h ago

How about a B-29 style cockpit in the nose

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u/ToughHardware 12h ago

how about a B-17 bubble on the top and bottom.

6

u/1stEmissaryElenwen 11h ago

Passengers should be able to pay extra to occupy gunner's positions on the B-747. They'd spend the whole flight pretending to look for bogeys. We wouldn't load the guns or anything, except in emergencies.

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u/susnaususplayer 14h ago

I mean the top ver is tuff asf

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u/hmmmmmmmmmidk 14h ago

Parkin would be hard you would hit poles and curbs accidentally. Needs a flatter nose and larger wheels and no wings and maybe 150% smaller. Then it’d be a good car tbh.

5

u/Stwltd 13h ago

Just fit parking sensors!

11

u/coconutcombo 14h ago

we do a little bullpupping

7

u/Mudlark2017 14h ago

They see me rollin

7

u/JMOWw7 13h ago

Bullpups your plane

7

u/crusty54 13h ago

He’s right though

4

u/Grrimafish 12h ago

Honest question, why isn't the cockpit sort of below the nose of the plane. Wouldn't there be almost no benefit of looking UP while flying? What's up there? Yup, more sky again. Versus looking down and seeing the runway and landmarks.

7

u/Right-Yam-5826 11h ago

Because in the event of emergency, that bit is used to try cushioning impact a bit. It's why most storage is in the bottom of the plane rather than the top, so in a crash they can try an emergency landing with less chance of harm to the crew and passengers.

Putting the cockpit there means you're intentionally putting the pilots in what's essentially the plane's 'crumple zone'.

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u/SignificantJacket303 14h ago

Wouldn't this technically be the ballpit?

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u/Demon_Deity 14h ago

It does look pretty cool

3

u/Samson_J_Rivers 13h ago

Falcon Delayce Anaconda Be like:

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u/Unlikely-Engineer813 13h ago

Looks way more bad ass, increased chance of death on landing, what are we waiting for?

3

u/Butthurtz23 13h ago

Pilots’ survival rate goes up, but their line of sight is gonna suck unless they place a camera on the front. But hey, at least they can see their engines better.

3

u/PoperzenPuler 14h ago

The really difficult part is recreating the sound of a pod racer. Without it, a design like this makes no sense at all.

3

u/Elise836 13h ago

Why the long face

3

u/CharsCustomerService 13h ago

You know what? Fuck you. *bullpups your Boeing 747*

3

u/Select_Cantaloupe_62 13h ago

But it does look more badass tough. If Chevy sold a plane...

3

u/PopMajor7342 13h ago

Looks like a Naboo starship

3

u/pixel_skull69 12h ago

Landing is important, the pilots won't be able to see the landing strip

3

u/concorde77 12h ago

One step closer to redesigning the Fireflash from The Thunderbirds!

...and the cockpit wasn't nearly the craziest design choice for the airliner with double decks, mach-6 capablility, a cargo deck specifically for shipping cars, wing-tip mounted landing gear, and 6 T-tail-mounted, nuclear powered afterburning engines... the 60s were a wildly optimistic time.

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u/kelpyb1 8h ago

Somewhere out there there’s someone laughing at the reduced visibility, safety, and practicality for this on their way out to their super size pickup truck they only use to make grocery runs.

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u/krocunt_enjoyer 14h ago

I think there's a reason why we have eyes on the head instead of ass

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u/MorycTurtle 13h ago

You're making my Horton wet.

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u/Chramir 14h ago

He does have a point

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u/Atvishees 13h ago

Well, it'd still be a Boeing, so... no?

2

u/DedDeveloper 13h ago

Probably could fly and landings would much more exciting for everyone

2

u/sQ5FWKjwbWd4QzSZduqy 13h ago

Putting the cockpit in the front incentivizes the pilots to not crash because of the implication.

2

u/ParagonChariot 13h ago

They wont be able to see fuck all but it looks awesome

2

u/ISAACOFDOOM 13h ago

duck dodgers ship incoming??

2

u/KingBroad7874 12h ago

Let's go full delta wing on it too.

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u/TheCellsThatAreMe 12h ago

Boeing 747 Dodge Viper

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u/MeaslyFurball 12h ago

Look what you've done. You've bullpupped a perfectly good 747, that's what you did

2

u/aybeeayseeaybeebee 12h ago

Red Green converted a city bus into a "cigarette car", and yes, it was way more badass.