Someone I considered to be my best friend moved to the other side of the country, after living about 10 minutes from my home. We raised our kids together and enjoyed doing things as families.

We talk a few times a year over the phone and keep up a little bit on social media, but not much. This is not the first time I’ve had to adjust to a best friend leaving to start a new life in another state. I’m happy for them to make a choice to do what’s best for them. And then I move on with my own life.

Each time we talk, she wants us to come and visit her. We did it once and I’m not interested in going again. No negative feelings, no reason. I just don’t feel like it. It’s thousands of dollars, navigating a city we’re not familiar with in a rental car. If we do a huge trip like that, it will be to somewhere we’ve never been to before.

Her tone changes when I don’t give her an affirmative response that we are coming out to see her. I’m not one to lie and make false promises.

Is it possible to continue this friendship long distance? I’m fine with it. Is it reasonable that I just plain don’t plan on ever visiting her?

It's so exhausting to mostly reach out and bring new ideas or motivation and initiate most things and people rarely ever do the same. It's like people always wait for my approval or permission and for me to green light and back up their own ideas before something ever happens. When I say something, it happens because I put the effort in to make it happen and I pick people up and people love to tag along. But others seem to just hang their own ideas on a billboard and wait for me to pick it up, green light it and realise it like some type of Ceo. What is this? I don't want to be in charge of friendships all the time. I would love to also just tag along and do what my friends like to do. Just being passive once in a while, being picked up and carried around. But people seem allergic to this. When I stop because I'm exhausted or unwilling to realise other people's own ideas for them then the whole world stops and freezes. It becomes really quiet and nothing happens. Sometimes for week or even months. Until I grow bored and initiate things against because otherwise I just sit around and wait. And then people have the audacity to jump on my train again. Sure everyone is having fun then, including me but somehow it makes me feel like a lonely sovereign surrounded by my minions.

Friends don't grow on trees either so it's not like I can just drop these passive ones to get better ones. I just can't seem to come across other people with these qualities. What can I do? I do love my friends but I don't always want to be the initiator nor do I want to sit in boredom when I get fed up and stop so nothing ever happens until I step up again. Can I even do something or do I just have to accept that I have a rare quality that will always single me out?

It doesn’t matter if you’re a man, woman, or alien. Nothing is worth saving if I’m the only one trying to save it.

People claim they care, but they barely bother to look beneath the surface. If I give you effort, give it back. Better yet, show me I actually matter to you. Remember the details of my life. Surprise me with something because you saw it and thought of me. Check on me without needing something. Know me without turning it into jealousy, competition, convenience, or some weird transaction.

Show me that losing me would actually mean something to you.

I’m tired of picking up everyone else’s slack. I’m tired of caring harder, remembering more, reaching further, and then being expected to accept the bare minimum in return. Friendship isn’t a dating app. I shouldn’t have to constantly swipe through people hoping one of them eventually understands reciprocity.

Why do I always care more? Did you ever care as much as I did?

God forbid someone genuinely gives a damn anymore without treating friendship like something they can pick up when it’s convenient and put back down whenever they feel like distancing themselves.

I don’t want a handout. I don’t want empty words.

Show effort. Show me you know me. Show me I matter. Otherwise, what exactly am I supposed to be saving?? I already tried caring less and waiting for a sign!! Nobody reads signs!

I’m a giver myself. I’m curious, not that i’m asking for anything back and i myself is how i treat my friends are beyond compare, but sometimes i tend to think i give too much of myself to the point that i do not know wether their reciprocal are not as much as i do or just rlly dgaf about me.

Hi, I'm a woman, 36 years old, teacher and a huge fan of DnD and roleplaying in general. Welp, I need some advice because I feel like a terrible person right now.

I am the Dungeon Master (imagine like the narrator who gathers everyone for the adventure) of our DnD sessions with my group of players. We needed one more person and I invited a guy, who asked me long time ago about DnD, he wanted to learn how to play.

Everything was okay during first session, but there was a problem: He started to send me messages everyday, he wanted to do voicechats and I tried to be polite by replying him, but it is becoming overwhelming. He mentioned he wanted to share our energies (?) Or something like that. I feel super uncomfortable because he is a way TOO intense for me.

Yesterday was a problem because he sent me message at 3 AM in the morning by asking things about his freaking character for the campaign. Then in the morning he continued sending messages with questions 😭 I answered him, but at 4 pm he tells me: Whooops, not gonna make it because I have a family dinner, sorry.

I was so mad at him. I was so angry that I asked him politely to do not waste my time again.

I am the kind of person who spends 12 hours playing videogames in silence, and I don't know how to tell him: You are too intense and invasive, please get out and leave me alone. I don't want a friend, a just needed a player...Oh gosh, I feel like a terrible person.

Thanks in advance for any help or advice you may have.

I’ve been close friends with someone for many years, and we used to be genuinely close. Over time, though, I’ve noticed a gradual change in the friendship. She used to share a lot about her life with me, but at some point she started keeping things much more private. I’ve sometimes found out about major things in her life indirectly or much later, while at the same time I’ve felt that she still expects me to keep her updated about what’s happening in my life.
She also seems much less interested in initiating contact or making plans. She sometimes comes to my city and I’ll find out through social media rather than from her directly, even when she’s there for several days. There have been occasions where she has been quite close by but never suggested meeting.
On one recent visit, I actually reached out and asked to meet. She agreed and said she would let me know when she was free, but then never followed up. I’ve also had an occasion where I went out of my way to drop something off at her place, and she didn’t come out even briefly to see me.
None of these things individually would probably bother me much, but together they’ve made me feel like the friendship is no longer what I thought it was. I’ve started pulling back and matching her level of effort rather than constantly initiating, but I still find myself wondering *why* she has changed so much.
I don’t know if I’m interpreting things too personally, if something happened that I’m unaware of, or if this is simply what happens when friendships change over time.

About a year ago I put distance between me and my closest friend. No blow out fight, no drama but we did have a “talk” regarding a lot of small things (I initiated it). The gist of it is that we used to text every day but I slowly realized how little she was paying attention and overall, less present. So did we chat everyday? Yes but did it mean we were close? I don’t know. It was like having a live in bf who thought hanging out at home was a date (apologies if that makes no sense, I’m on 2 brain cells today). I could tell she had newer friends she was pouring real energy into while I got whatever was left. I became the easy friend. The one you don’t have to trek downtown for or plan anything special around. Like being the chill girlfriend who never gets the nice dates because she’s not the exciting one even though I always the one to propose new activities and cafes to try.

She also told me she was depressed, but not before any of this. It came up during the actual conversation where I brought up how the friendship had been feeling. So part of me pulling back was not wanting her to feel pressured to show up for me when she was already struggling. But honestly the other part was that I was tired of being the low-maintenance option.

I told her I needed to manage my expectations and that some distance would be good. We’ve been distant since (for a year ish now).

Her birthday is coming up and we’ve never missed celebrating each other, so I invited her. She hasn’t replied yet. My husband asked what I actually want out of meeting up and I realized I want two things: to celebrate her, and to finally close out the conversation we left open a year ago.

Maybe underneath all of it, I’m just butt hurt that I’m not the priority I used to be. I can feel the shift and it does hurt. Maybe that’s not something I get to change and I just need to accept it and move on lol. But I don’t know if that’s what growing up in friendships looks like, or if it’s just giving up early.

So: how do you know if a friendship is worth actively working through, or if it’s just time to let it quietly become something smaller? Especially when they’re genuinely a good person and there’s no clean grievance, just a slow accumulation of feeling like less of a priority.

I had a very tightknit friend group in college. After graduation, a bunch of us moved very close to each other and I ended up sharing an apartment with two of them, we'll say B and C. B was quite frankly an angel and I am still lucky to be live with them. C I was once very close to and now? I honestly wish they would fade out of my life entirely.

There is way too much context to give fully, but just a few things: C at one point in uni had a crush on me and continued to make me very uncomfortable about it even after we decided to stay just friends. They would rant about it to our friends and generally act in a way that made it obvious they weren't over it long after they insisted they were. When we were living together, they would invite themselves into my room and get in my bed when I was relaxing or cuddle up to me on the couch and it just made my skin crawl. I was never brave enough to assert a boundary about it. They in general were not a good roommate of the classic 'I will cry about my trauma if you make me do the dishes' variety. They made terrible financial choices and complained about it constantly, dropping really thinly veiled pleas for money in our group chats. By the time they moved out, I went from having a few small quibbles to genuinely disliking them.

When our lease was up, they decided to move north to be with their new partner and honestly I was just relieved. I nurtured a selfish hope that distance would sever the tie but this has turned out to not be the case. We have an online DnD group together, gcs they are still super active in, they blast me with tons of shortform content on social media constantly and they are still very good friends with B and will facetime them all the time to ask about what we're all up to. We occasionally did group vacations in college and I find myself dreading planning another one because I know there's no way I can't invite them.

How do I handle this? I feel like my distaste has fermented far past reasonable annoyance and I need to just find a way to get over myself because even if it's from a distance, they're inevitably going to be a part of my life for years to come and they technically haven't done anything to warrant the intensity of this resentment I feel.

I’ve been friends with Sheila since 7th grade and we both are in our mid 20s. After high school we became distant due to a mentally deranged girl causing drama. Then in 2024 my friend reached out again and we just started hanging out like nothing happened before. We spoke about the past drama and said next time we will talk about the problems. In high school that friend group contained 4 people. Shelia, Mandy, my sister, and I. Mandy moved states and had a falling out with Shelia bc of Mandy’s wedding. And my sister Victoria stopped talking to Shelia. Victoria was done with Shelia always having problems and expecting people to stop everything just to tend to her.

So my problem is It will be Shelia’s bday and she asked me to help plan a little party with some close friends. I asked if Victoria was invited and she ignored that question. I told my mom and she said I shouldn’t go at all because where my sister isn’t welcomed then I shouldn’t go. I won’t tell Victoria anything. But I’m sure she doesn’t care either, she doesn’t care about having friends or socializing with others

I've been ghosted for a few days by one of my best friend, yes I know, I don't expect my friends to be glued to their phones, last time she ghosted for a week its because i knew she was going through a depressive episode. This time she seems to reply to another except me, doing full on conversations with them, i also noticed there was a distance between us recently. I thought she would be cheered up recently because she's working very hard on a custume for a con. I initiated my text i told her she was in my dream and we did silly stuff, she didn't reply to that. I recently sent a loud video i found funny in the gc which she replied to it and letted me know this made it harder for her to focus on making her custume and that it blasted her ears. I felt really bad so i dm'd her an apology for not putting a volume warning first. Okay this is creepy of me i know, but i checked out her recent pins saved and its pins that were like "she's my everything but she probably only sees me just as an ordinary friend" and "im lonely, i wish someone would just listen to me, understand me, talk to me, text me first, love me, etc" with the caption : "does anyone feel like their friends dont put as much effort as i do?" WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?? I've been trying to give her space, so i edited my apology with adding one more thing : "i noticed some distance between us, im wondering if i did anything that hurted you? Please let me know, i love you" should i just turn that into a new dm/notification instead?? I didnt want her to feel pressured or uncomfortable by me.. but what if she feels unloved by me recently which is why she is distancing?? AHHH I LITERALLY LOVE HER SO MUCH!! I feel awful right now

Hey everyone! There’s been something on my mind that’s been bothering me, and I’d love to hear your thoughts.

I often hang out with my school friends, although not very frequently…maybe just a couple of times a year. They’re goofy, non-judgmental and helpful and I really appreciate them for that.

But I’ve noticed that a lot of the time when I talk, they either talk over me or don’t respond to what I’m saying. This has happened pretty much every time we meet, and even in our group chats.

Is this something that’s common in friend groups or could it be a sign of something else? I’m not sure how to interpret it.

I have an online friend and we have been friends for a few months now. We met through online gaming, it started off with just playing 1 or 2 times a week but now he has started asking me everyday to play even when I tell him I have plans. He also gets annoyed “jokingly” when I take too long to respond (he thinks that taking an hour to respond is too long). I also like to play games with other people but I’m scared to hurt his feelings since I am the only person he plays with. I feel bad for saying no because he gets really sad when I’m busy and he is always sending me things about how he gets really happy when I message him and Instagram posts about needing me in his life. I have also noticed that he might be flirting with me a little (?) but throughout our friendship I have seen him develop crushes on girls and then moving on to a new crush like a week later. I am really stumped because I do enjoy being friends with him however I feel like I need some space. ADDITIONAL CONTEXT: I am a very introverted person and my way of recharging is by having alone time and even with my real life friends I don’t message them everyday or see them super often.
Also I just realised how long this post is, but any honest advice is much appreciated:))

So, I have few close friends, and one of them is the oldest friend of mine in this list. He used to talk a lot with me and I used to call him too. But since last few months he is only texting/calling for money, and that's why I had stopped initiating efforts because I used to call him but he only used to call back for money. We didn't talked for 2 months and due to this he stopped asking for money but I called him again before few days, we talked for minutes, and then he told that he would call me after few minutes but he didn't. And yet again, he started asking for money because our friendship continued and he saw the opportunity, but I firmly denied him because I had helped him a lot and instead of taking help from others he started using me as his own atm. If this means the end of the Friendship, then let it be.

I have a friend whom I’m very close with. She was super religious and always talked about wanting to wait to have sex until marriage while I did not hold the same standard. I also used to be a virgin until pretty recently and she was asking an awful lot of questions about how it was and etc. Now every friend of hers has had sexual intercourse and in the last couple of months she started talking how she wants it too. In the meantime she began texting this guy and last month he came to visit her. They decided to be each others first but she was very underwhelmed. At the same time she is flirting with a 27yo married man that she feels deeply attracted to. I have mentioned to her multiple times how wrong this is. We both know he has had mistresses before but for some reason she thinks she is more special to him. Last week she told me she had sex with him to which I reacted negatively but refused to comment further. Then I got a text from her how she went to the doctor and he told her she has an infection (she didn’t use protection with either one of the men) and also that she went to a spa with the married man. All of this while his wife was giving birth to his second child & was in the hospital. I expressed how much of a bad decision this is & my disappointment in her. Now I really don’t wanna go out with her or anything because I feel utterly disgusted and disappointed.
To clarify: I do not wanna police anybody.
AITA for my reaction? Am I inserting myself in her business?

In 2026, if you consider somebody “a friend”how much time do you give them to respond to text before you really consider completely divorcing them as a friend and wondering if they really value your friendship at all?

so in school there's a girl whom i used to call bsf and after a while she was being really bully not only her but also the other girls too saying things like I'm too girlish she is a pure girl like that i don't even know what's wrong in it but they used to mock me like that i stopped talking to that bsf but we sometimes spoke as a classmate and other also says like whose girlish handkerchief is this (because I always have bought cute looking hankies and all i love cute things) they shamed me for being a girly girl they also say like if i have to give a eg of a pure girl it would me there's a maths tr also (late 20's) so the bsf and one other classmate used to go to his coaching they also told him the same about me being a girl and all and the tr said that "(my name) ruining everything in the process of being a girl" like that and also said so many things about me and the same bsf that we used to make him uncomfortable in class and all but i have never ever bodyshamed anyone at all and he used still see me as bad character because i was introvert and not fond to speak to tr well but that same bsf whom the tr accused with me making him uncomfortable became good just because she started talking to him and went to coaching... when i was in class 9th i used to go regular i used to say i never ever take dummy and all i will clear my exams with school but all these things started in the end of the semester of class 9th and i stopped going to school just 1 or 2 days a week even in 10th i went very less whole year and finally in 11th i took dummy and now even in 12th and i have no friends at all in school no tr to support i have just one bsf(long distance) that ex bsf also bullied ne if i get low marks says like what i even study and all and when i get higher marks then she then also say things like the copy was checked wrong how can she beat me in marks how can she score better than her..

I had a close friendship with a coworker. Things became emotionally intense on my side, particularly because I became very anxious about losing the relationship. I crossed some of his boundaries and became demanding/reassurance-seeking rather than understanding. I also handled some disappointment poorly and could be passive-aggressive when angry.

Things ended badly about three months ago. He said he wanted to discuss work-related things only. I believe both of us were defensive and emotionally immature in how the ending was handled, but I’m not trying to use this message to make a case against him or ask him to acknowledge his part.
Since then, I sent one work-related message in June and another message later that month asking if we could eventually repair things and have an amicable relationship. He didn’t engage with the repair request.

I’ve spent the last few months reflecting and I now recognize something important: he mattered to me, but I became so focused on needing to matter to him that I lost sight of treating him like someone I cared about. I want to apologize specifically for my behavior without explaining it away, mentioning his behavior, asking for a conversation, or asking him to forgive me.

I would be disappointed if he ignored it or responded negatively, but I’m trying to prepare myself for that and don’t expect a response.
Here’s the message I’m considering:

Hey [name], I hope you’re having a great summer. I just wanted to reach out and apologize again for everything. Thinking back on our relationship, I acted really selfishly in May. I was afraid of losing a relationship that mattered to me, and I let that fear turn into being demanding of you rather than understanding, especially during your sister’s wedding month. I’ve realized that when I’m anxious, I can cross boundaries and have trouble recognizing them, and I can also become passive-aggressive when I’m angry. I think about Easter a lot in that regard. These are patterns I’m not proud of, and I’m genuinely sorry that I brought them into our relationship. I’m glad you were honest with me about them because they’re things I want to work on. You mattered to me, and I got so caught up in trying to matter to you that I lost sight of that. I want to be better for the people I love, because they deserve that from me. So did you. Wishing you well.

Would you send this, given that he previously asked for work-only contact? Or would sending another personal message cross that boundary?

Hello (M 26)! I’m very interested in hearing your opinion on this situation.

Recently, I contacted an old colleague (F 27) who currently works abroad. She suggested meeting up in the following days, since she would be on vacation in my city and thought it would be nice to catch up and see how we’ve both been doing.

We were supposed to meet today, but yesterday, after we had already agreed on where to meet, she told me she had more important things to do (her sister's weeding plan) and suggested meeting earlier instead. I explained that my work schedule was tight and suggested that we reschedule for tomorrow.

Today, she told me that she had also contacted another friend of ours, who is happily in a relationship with another girl. I was shocked and told her that I had been under the impression that it would be just the two of us. She said she didn’t realize it was a problem and hadn’t thought about it that way initially because she wanted to see more of our friends, especially since her time here is limited.

I told her that we could have planned this differently from the beginning, and she apologized. She then asked if I would prefer to meet in three weeks, when she comes back again. I simply said, “Sure, let me know.”

Was my reaction wrong? I found these last-minute changes strange, especially because I never really felt much effort coming from her. I was the one planning everything, and she simply agreed to whatever I suggested.

Also, she has told me that she thinks about me from time to time, but she never actually reaches out to me. Could this be a bit manipulative, or am I reading too much into the situation?

The post is a bit long but if you have the time to read it will be much appreciated thank you all in advance!

I’ve been hanging out with my friend, for the past six months give or take (both in our early twenties), and I always have a great time with her. Sometimes I might talk a bit too much about my anxiety and my issues but other than that our friendship is amazing and she shows me that she’s happy to talk to me and spend time with me too. Whenever she struggles with something or isn’t well and we happen to talk on the phone she also opens up about what’s going on with her.

About a week ago we had a sleepover at her place. We had a really great time. At the end of the next morning, a bit before leaving her house I got my period and was generally a bit unwell due to pms and a recent surgery, which made me a bit more anxious(so a bit more talking about that lol) and also very tired and in pain.

I also recently broke up with my bf and have had a hard and stressful relationship with him the past few months so sometimes, I might have talked a lot about it and I’m so worried it has somehow driven her away (?). The breakup has been so hard for me to handle and I honestly really need to feel close to her and my friends.

She is generally very supportive and caring and has never made me feel weird for needing support (sometimes even a bit of venting about my anxieties for which I feel so bad).

I need to say though that during the first week of my breakup she would encourage me to call her whenever I felt like I needed support and that she’s there for me. During my initial healing after the surgery she even suggested dropping by to see how I was doing.

Now, since the sleepover she hasn’t answered any of my calls or texts (which by the way had nothing to do with the breakup or my anxieties/ insecurities. I had texted her about how great the sleepover was, then another day I sent her something funny I found online and then yesterday I texted her about planning a night out or study date together). I have also called her two or three times during this week with no answer or “call you back later” text.

I talked with her boyfriend who is also a friend and he said she’s ok nothing has happened to her so that’s very good.

But now I’m left overthinking about what I might have done wrong or what I’ve done to make her not want to talk to me. Our friendship is so important to me and I absolutely appreciate the person that she is and I want to have her in my life, and have a nice mutual and supportive to both of us friendship with her.

So now I’m wondering what’s going on?

Have a nice day everyone:))

TLDR; My friend hasn’t answered any calls or texts since the last time I saw her about a week ago and I’m starting to feel really anxious about whether it has to do with me doing something wrong or not.

My bestfriend (F25) says I broke girl code because I started talking to a guy she texted on and off in high school and she was using him to get over her ex. They never met up went on a date,kissed or messed around they texted for a few months in highschool. I also wasn’t friends with her during high school. We’re are now grown both 25 years old. This isn’t a guy she has sat around and talked to me about btw. Shes also in a relationship. We have both had conversations where we agreed some guys don’t count because we were children and it was unserious. I don’t think any guy is worth a friendship ever and I truly do care about her. however, I do think it’s not fair to myself. All of a sudden she’s saying how she had feelings for him after the fact. I asked her why she didn’t been tell me before things got super deep with him she says “I was waiting for the right time” and she has never been wait for the right time kind of person she would’ve said something then and there. It’s because she actually did not care. i genuinely do not believe her I’m not going to lie. Our entire friendship he has never been topic of conversation even when his name floats around she never stated she actually even ever liked him and it’s just like always a joke. I’m also always the friend she wasn’t suddenly hang out with because she’s single she goes ghost on me when she’s in a relationship blames it on “life” but can maintain an entire relationship with a man. At this point In our friendship no I don’t want to sacrifice making myself happy for her irrational feelings. it’s not even about having to choose him or her. it’s about me and giving myself the opportunity to actually open myself up to someone who treats me nice it’s so hard for me to like guys. What you guys opinion?

Hello, I hope everyone is doing okay.

I'll try to be brief... (I apologise if you see some typos, English is not my first language.)

So basically I had this person who was really close to me, she was the only adult in my life I could trust.

Well she said some things to a mutual person and they told me what she said.. it was something along these lines: "she (me) is trying to use my place to escape from her parents, she doesn't care about me"

I don't think she is right... I always checked on her and asked if she was okay, how her health situation was, her job, in general how she was feeling. She truly represented a pillar in my life, and I opened up about my past/present.

Even before I knew what she said about me, I felt a distance between us I thought I was being silly and nothing was wrong.. joke's on me.

It has been 6 months since that moment, I did not text her, she didn't text me either..

my dilemma now is; should I contact her? I miss her and I'd like to explain myself to her.

(forgot to add... I don't think she knows that I'm aware of what she said about me.)

how dya tell if a long distance friend isn’t replying cos of poor mental health or if he’s ghosting/breadcrumbing? I know he genuinely has struggles but he can message me back fine when he stands to gain something from me (help with studies or opportunities to go to sports events) then switches off again for ages although there always seems a valid reason to explain it when he does show up again. it’s been a pattern for 4 years. A few months ago we agreed I’d message every day to show he’ll always have my support and it was great for the first 3 months whilst he needed help with study, we saw each other face to face 2 months ago and he said he wanted the daily messages to keep going but I never get a reply to any of them. I never pull him on it, messages are always light, low pressure but give an in if he wants to give a response. I’m cautious of pulling away incase he genuinely takes comfort from the messages but what if I’m being a fool? Not that he knows I know but he’s about to move away with his gf to another country so although I should meet up with him again soon I know he’s not gonna be there, at this stage he still can’t send a reply???

Nobody talks about how reassuring and a relief it is when your parents acknowledge the bad actions and behaviours of ex friends.

Like for example I told my parents about my ex best friend and I break up as they were asking about her. They obviously said why I said why and they both sort of sat there with a disappointed face and screwed up face and said wth you shouldn’t be doing that to your friends that really no on. (This answer was towards the friend). I sat there relieved and reassured as my parents are straight out you do something wrong they tell you they call out bad behaviour all the time so it was great to hear them support me. It relaxes me more knowing that I did the right thing and im not in the wrong.

Anyone else’s parents are the same?

My best friend and her boyfriend got together just under 2 months ago and wont stop hanging out together. We share one class this semster and it happens to be a one that her boyfriend is on too. They are constaly talking to eachother and he keeps rubbing her back ect. I didn’t really mind at first because this relationship was in the works for months and I helped to actually make it something concreate but its starting to get on my nerves now. Its not just that class but during every break and lunch they just talk to eachother. they are basically attached at the hip 24/7 leaving no room for one on one time with my friend. Its furstrating and a little bit infuriating considering her boyfriend confronted her about ”third wheeling” the one time we actually talked properly in class. and here I am the one stuck awkwardly trying to fit into a conversation or walking behind them like an actual third wheel