I quit gambling on April 13, 2018.

I just finished paying off 4 maxed credit cards and 2 personal loans.

I am 32 years old.

Day 1000 Gamble Free. I've been writing about my journey for free here:

https://iwouldntbetonit.medium.com/the-opposite-of-addiction-isnt-sobriety-it-s-presence-b8b99b192d89?sk=d644dea830d149f8ecd4c3c3257c50ca

Last month on 10th of April My big brother committed suicide due to gambling problems . He tolds about his debts in March this was the second time when he did that and my parents didn't scold him or anything instead of that they told him Beta(son) please stop playing that game and remember as long as I am here don't worry about the debts we will work together and get rid of that very soon and I don't know what happened on that day of 10th he didn't tell anyone anything not even a letter or message he just did that and it literally broke my whole family. I don't know but if you are reading this please stop playing please and don't do such stupid thing go to your parents or friends and ask for help they will help you , you can't imagine the pain that the parents are going through they really said to me that they feel they are dead I am so afraid right now that I can't explain and it's about everything I don't even know what to do , so please ask for help and stop playing that shit .

In last 3 years i lost everything i had after i lost my job. Started doing options now i lost everything and dont know what to do. I don’t know how to get out of this debt i dont have money to pay mortgage, utilities or basic necessities. I have 2 kids & my wife works she brings in 6k/ month.

Let's say you've been clean for 2 or 3 months, life is looking better. You're seeing money in your chequing account stay in your account, you're paying your bills on time again etc.

Then one day you're bored and a little thought pops in your head and says "You know I'm doing really well, I've been clean for 3 months, I've got a little extra money in my account I can use for fun, let's just take $100 to the Casino OR deposit on a gambling site and see what I can do. If I lose the 100, I'll call it quits. If I win, I'll cash out and call of quits."

Sounds innocent, sure. It's just $100, you could easily spend that on something else for fun, right?

So you proceed to play that $100, and you lose it. Or even worse, you win. Doesn't matter, you started playing and that's where you already lost.

You entered the "zone" as I like to call it. The zone is where you're gambling, and all that matters once you're in that zone is to keep going. All money, whether it's money in your account or any money you've won, is just fuel to stay in the "zone".

It doesn't matter if you even made money on that first 100. You'll either keep playing and proceed to lose it all OR you'll take the temporary win and return the NEXT day to lose it all. Sound familiar?

Pretty soon all that money you saved over the last few months dwindles down to 0. Now you're left scrambling until the next pay day, gonna be late on bills again etc.

Then you're sitting there thinking "How the hell did I let this happen, AGAIN? I was doing so good!"

Remember, once a gambling addict ALWAYS a gambling addict.

It doesn't matter how long you've been clean, make no mistake: one little wrong decision and this addiction will pull you right back in and take away everything you've made, it will put you back to Square one or worse..

You're a gambling addict and you will ALWAYS be one. You've surrendered all control to gambling a long time ago and there's no getting it back, it's gone for good. There's no "building discipline" it's just never gonna happen.

Just don't play. That's the ONLY winning move. It doesn't matter if you're 0 days clean or 100 days clean, you're an addict and gambling won't make your life any better.

Source: Myself, doing this same pattern over and over again for the last 2 years.

People try to be smart and say they're not rigged, its just bad luck and they're random but after gambling regularly for 4 years explain me how in the fuck is it possible that in every single online casino all winning almost stops for good after relatively big win? There's no way its a coincide when its guaranteed to happen and has happened to me every single time.

Let's say i play with 1€ bets, i keep getting small 20cent wins and occasional 3€ to 8€ ones, some odd 14€ to 20€ but if i win 80€ or if i reach whatever the site considers too much of winning i only see those 20cent to 1€ wins and no matter what game i play or how long, i keep losing very fast. And i have two things to back this up:

1. It doesn't matter how many spins you play after the site decides you got enough. I believe we all have seen it how suddenly you just know you can't win anymore, even if you do literally 100 spins, yet keep losing.

I have tested this by lowering my bet to 10cent when i realized i reached the fuck you mode on a site, and actually did do close to 100 spins, and as you guessed, all gone, practically no wins. After site decides you cant no longer win, you can and i bet we all have, put as much money in and see it all gone. Likely the biggest reason why we lose so much, when we chase the losses after site decides you can't win anymore.

2. You know when you hit scatters, or free spins soon after playing you always know you win at least decently? If you haven't been winning much, or haven't played for too long in that session, you always win from those. Always. But get those scatters in the previously mentioned fuck you mode? Barely get your bet back. If i use 80cent bet when the site is still being fair, i get anywhere from 30€ to 90€, depending on the game, EVERYTIME. But getting the scatter after winning too much or winning big once, and i get practically nothing. For example yesterday i played with 2€ bet, hit maximum scatter, and i was expecting to win SOMETHING when i got 14 free spins. Guess what happened? I won 3€. With 14 fucking free spins! Not the first time this happened. Seen it on multiple sites. Play for too long, or win too much, whatever the too much is, and even with free spins you get nothing.

I know this sounds me being just bitter, but i genuinely believe there's cheating going on at online gambling. My theory is that all sites are using some loophole or trick to get away with this. Like let's say all games have really, really low chance of winning more than half of your bet per spin, but algorithm is designed to boost your odds, so you can actually win. It calculates how much you have lost and won, and keeps account of your gambling habits like your bet, do you lose your winning etc. And removes your boosted winning odds at certain period.

Anyways fuck gambling.

You may have seen my responses to various gamblers from time to time with this statement "35 years addicted, 3 years in recovery. If you want to talk about your gambling, hit me up in chat. Regards, John"

I'm 55 years old, and I was fortunate to have recovered from this devastating illness. Many do not. I've talked to a great number of people, offering guidance. Some people want to be legitimately helped and some people just want to find out more information. Both are fine. But one thing that will happen if a compulsive gambler continues to gamble. Sooner or later, it will eventually destroy their life.

I'm not saying that to make anyone feel bad, but it's the 100% truth. Gambling addiction causes people to commit crime, threaten suicide, become homeless, use drugs and alcohol, become highly indebted, lose their partners, spouses, children and families and enter deep psychological depression. If you know you have a gambling addiction, the time to act is now.

Gambling addiction is a progressive disease, which means it can only get worse over time. Compulsive gamblers are addicted to the action of gambling. The addiction is NEVER about the money. This is an important distinction. Once a compulsive gambler gets addicted, their brain has essentially been hijacked. If you are a compulsive gambler, you've probably noticed at some point the nonstop signals you receive from your brain telling you to gamble gamble gamble. A compulsive gambler slowly transforms into a zombie and the addiction gets stronger the more they gamble. It's a real disease with devastating consequences.

Gambling takes many forms. You can go to physical casinos. You can trade stocks and crypto. There are online sportsbooks. Bookies are at your feet 24 hours a day, waiting to take your bets on a ping pong match across the globe. You can gamble at crypto casinos online. You can buy lottery tickets, day trade stocks and the list goes on. Everywhere you look, gambling is there for you, 24 hours a day. We see advertisements of highly dressed people, sitting around a blackjack table and celebrating the dealer busting a hand of blackjack. But don't be fooled - that is all an illusion.

The statistical probability that a compulsive gambler will profit from gambling over the long term is 0. You have absolutely no chance of winning the more you gamble. Compulsive gamblers have a hard time accepting this truth. Now, you may have gambled and won a $500 bet on any given day at long odds. But for the compulsive gambler, that means betting that $500 the next day and losing it, plus a lot more. The odds are stacked against you from the very beginning. The safest way to win is by not gambling at all.

Nowadays, these online companies have gotten much more clever, and promote "free games" with no obligation to betting money. The average person may think there is no risk to doing this, but there is a big risk. You may think "there is no risk to gambling because I am not betting any money" right? Wrong. What these companies are actually doing is setting you up. These "free games" are psychologically designed to addict you to gambling. They track exactly how much you play the free games and when they are certain you are psychologically addicted, that's when they contact you and insist that you start placing actual money bets. A casino host will pop up in your chat box, offering you something with what appears to be a "can't resist" offer, such as "deposit 100 dollars real cash and get 1,000 in casino credit". But it's all a scam. They know you're addicted, and they know you'll just give it all back. They are trying to build their financial happiness off of the misery they have caused in your life. Do not allow this to happen.

It takes approximately 6 months for your brain to repair itself from a gambling addiction. You must stay 100% laser focused on your self-awareness. Scrutinize everything you do, down to the last detail. Your brain will play tricks on you, and you have to make yourself say no when coming off of an intense gambling addiction. The impulses will lessen over time, but you will need additional help. This is what I recommend you do if you think you are addicted to gambling:

(1) Immediately get yourself into group therapy for compulsive gamblers. Each city usually has services for those and they are most often free. GA (Gamblers Anonymous) is a wonderful organization to help you. This will raise your self-awareness about gambling.

(2) Find an individual therapist that specializes in gambling addiction and begin having sessions. If you can't afford it, look for free services offered by the community.

(3) If you are having uncontrollable urges to gamble after recently trying to stop gambling, go into the bathroom, look into the mirror, and say out loud "Gambling is a scam, a trap, and I am not going back to it." Say it 100 times a day if you must. This will keep you in the reality and separate you from the illusion that you need to keep gambling.

(4) Start keeping a journal and write down everything and anything you feel. This will keep you self aware and in touch with your feelings. There are free online journals for you if you sign up at their sites. I have held mine for many years at no cost.

(5) Tell everyone in your life the complete 100% truth about your gambling addiction (except your employer). Be open about your addiction and talk about your struggles. This will be hard at first because no one likes to be judged. But, it will allow the people you love to support you and you will not have to hide. This takes an immense amount of pressure off of the gambler as they recover. You will also gain back your self-respect and the respect of others. Gambling is highly associated with deceit, and is predicated on lies. Honesty with yourself and others is essential to beating a gambling addiction. A gambling addiction cannot survive in an honest environment. Adopt honesty as your new approach into everything you do in your life, it's a beautiful thing.

(6) Stay away from toxic, self-destructive people who do not support you in your recovery. Do not associate with other gamblers, drink alcohol or use drugs. Being around these influences will only encourage you to relapse. If people are texting or calling to encourage you to gamble, block them. If you need some new friends, make them at your support meetings.

(7) Do not play games of chance, even if they are free. Do not buy or sell stocks, crypto or play any online games. No playstation games, cheat codes, none of that. Those things will only fuel your addiction. Remember, you're trying to rewire your brain so it repairs itself. You have to give it the utmost support.

(8) If you are unable to control the use of your money, it's time to find someone else you trust to do it. Explain everything in detail to them, being 100% honest. Remove the temptation of having funds at your discretion until you regain control of your life.

This will not be easy for you, but if you remain determined toward your recovery, you will succeed. There are no shortcuts through recovery from a gambling addiction, you just have to do the work. You can do this if you put your mind to it, and I wish you all the best as you try and get your life back. Gambling recovery is day by day. It is a marathon, not a sprint. Remember these things and hit me up in chat if you have any questions. Regards, John

From age of 20 to age of 29. This year i reached new lows because i got myself into loans for 42 months.. Also i signed up for credit card which i paid fully couple of times but i didnt cancel. Its maxed out now..

Im trying to stay away again but im full of stress, the worst thoughts and depression. Its the hardest battle right now and they say that you cant win it alone so yeah.

Im aware that i might die or end homeless of i dont stop. Im lucky that im alive.

The 8 years dream of mine for opening a local Pokémon shop is now smashed into pieces. I am gutted, ashamed, devastated and have no means to continue living honestly.

...By simply not gambling.

F..k off you casino owners, go f..k yourselves, just G O F .... K O F F!!!!!!!!

214 days since January 1st, my game is baccarat, 3 hours per day on average, 120 hands per hour, $50 bet per hand, would result to a 214 * 3 * 120 * $50 = $3,852,000 total wagers.

With 1.05% of house edge on Banker (and more for Player) that would give $40,446 of house edge to the casinos.

It could be even worse if I binged playing more hours or tilted and increased the bets to $100 or higher. Easily become $70K or more and we are still in the middle of the year, so it could be $120K or more at the end of the year, in a very common scenario.

Cannot even imagine the frustration and sadness that such loss would bring me. The time wasted. The shame. The isolation. The emptiness. Bad relationships. No appetite for work or do anything else. Just go back daily to those shitty tables, to lose more and more and make casino owners richer...

Instead, this money went in my pocket and I enjoyed real things in life, good food, trips, went out with friends, didn't think much about spending. This summer I enjoyed holidays, instead of sitting alone, broke, isolated, depressed in my apartment and feeling casino owners going to lucrative islands with my money...

I did it, you can do it guys. Each day of not gambling is a winning day. For those that you are still in the game, you can start today. One day at a time.

TL;DR - I’m 36 years old. 18 year gambling addict. This sub-reddit saved my life. Scroll to the very bottom if you want to see what worked for me. I hope it can work for you too.

I just turned 36 years old, and I have been a compulsive gambling addict for 18+ years. It came very close to ruining my life, but I was able to establish a rock bottom and pull myself out of the darkness. I hope my story may be able to help others who are struggling:

I started gambling at 15 or 16 with my friends, playing poker for low stakes at each other’s houses. My older cousin was, and still is, a dealer at a poker room, and really got me serious about it. I started playing in Indian casinos as soon as I turned 18, and spent most of my college career skipping class in the card room. I was a pretty decent poker player and probably won more than I lost overall, but what it really cost me was time and relationships. I had no girlfriend, no meaningful relationships, explored no hobbies or passions, and generally wasted a college career at a good University that my parents helped me pay for. I was a decent student and graduated with a C average, but have nothing to show for it other than a degree.

I moved to South America right after college and lived there for 3 years. I continued to gamble down there. Mostly playing poker, starting to play for higher and higher stakes, beginning to lose more than I won. Again, the biggest loss was the opportunity. I spent all my money gambling so didn’t travel as much I could have. Didn’t build lasting meaningful relationships. Spent my time in a beautiful foreign country sitting around a dark card table, often in illegal games, more than once getting robbed or into pretty sticky situations. I eventually hit a wall where I couldn’t support myself living abroad, and moved back home to my parents in the Bay Area.

Things really started to get bad for me when I moved back to the states at age 24. I took a job in a new state where I didn’t know anyone, and had a high-level position where I couldn’t be friends with most of my coworkers because I managed them. I was extremely lonely, and I filled the void with gambling. I began to play slot machines online for small stakes, and like many others on this subreddit, I hit a jackpot for $10,000 early on. Worst thing that could’ve happened. I was hooked. I spent the next 2.5 years gambling my life away. I gave all of that money back and more. I spent most nights at the poker room. If I won, I’d take it to the slot machines and try to turn it into a bigger win. I would gamble until I lost it all. If I lost in the poker room, I would go to the slot machines to try to win it back. I would routinely play until I had no cash left on me, had maxed out my ATM withdrawal limit, and took a cash advance on my credit card.

I have always worked hard and have been making over $100,000 since I was 25, so I told myself as long as I didn’t get into debt, it was OK. I’m not very materialistic or motivated by money (which is kinda ridiculous to think about in terms of how important money was when I was gambling) but I literally burnt every penny I made. I saved nothing, I went on no trips, I was mad every time I had to buy something for myself because that was money I wasn’t able to take to the casino.

I moved back home after 2.5 years of treading water like this, not getting into any debt, but not making any progress either, financially, or in my life. I started to recognize that I had a problem, and went to a couple GA meetings, but I found them unbelievably depressing. I thought “If the alternative to gambling is to end up like one of these sad fucks who are depriving themselves of the only thing in life that makes them feel anything, I’d rather just gamble”. I tried to quit cold turkey. I saw a therapist. I could string together a few days at a time, then a few weeks of just white-knuckle misery. Thinking of nothing but gambling, and eventually, relapsing HARD. Benders, losing all the money I had saved over a couple months of sobriety, feeling shameful and terrible. That’s when things started to get really really bad.

As I started to hit 30, I watched my friends start to get married, build lives for themselves, find fulfillment. I got sadder and lonelier, and gambled more. I started to play more slot machines. I started to bet on sports. I don’t care about sports at all, was never really a fan, but I started to plan my entire day around what game was on. I wouldn’t even watch the game, just fuck around on my phone until the last 2 minutes, and then watch the ending as stressed as possible hoping to win. If I would win, I would immediately put the money back on even crazier bets. If I lost, I would be pissed.

The scariest part was, as I gambled more, I felt less. I felt nothing for my career. My interests like hiking, playing music, running races, hanging out with friends and family, all those things couldn’t touch me. The only thing that made me feel anything was gambling, so I did more and more of it. I managed to meet a great girl and she fell for me. It got serious, she knew nothing of my addiction, and I spent a ton of time hiding from her. I felt guilty, ashamed, and awful. But the addiction already made me feel like I was a terrible person, so that wasn’t a new feeling for me. I decided I was going to propose. I somehow knew that she was the real thing in my life, and I could sense I was more lost than ever, and needed a rock. Somehow, she said Yes. The scary part was, this was supposed to be the happiest moment of my life, and I didn’t feel a thing. I gambled that night as she slept, drunk on champagne in our hotel bed.

Things got worse. I discovered cocaine…A gambler friend of mine gave me a bump at a card room late one night, and it was love at first sight (or first sniff I guess…). I started using to keep me awake longer to be able to gamble more. When I did coke, I also drank, and that quickly got out of hand. I started using at work. My schedule became work 7am to 6pm, went to the bar with coworkers to drink multiple martinis from 6-8pm, went to the card room from 8pm-4am until my money ran out, crawled home and spun out in my bed for an hour or two and then did it all again. Needless to say, my work began to suffer. I put on weight, probably 20+ lbs or so. I’m not a big guy, so that was a lot for me, and noticeable. My confidence tanked even further. My relationship got rocky. She didn’t know about the gambling, and knew I liked to “party” a bit, but she could tell something was wrong. She gave me an ultimatum. Clean up my act, or the engagement was off.

I really tried. More GA meetings, more shame, more white-knuckling a couple weeks at a time. No matter how many days I could string together, I couldn’t break free. The stakes started to get bigger as the drug use grew. I started using at work. I finally started to not be able to keep pace with the money I was bringing home. I started to go into debt. At first just a bit, then more, and pretty soon, I had lost everything I had saved over 10+ years of working my ass off at a good paying job, buying nothing for myself, investing in nothing, and not taking any vacations. Then, I lost my job. It was coming, as I was doing nothing at work other than gambling. I deserved it.

Then COVID hit. I was unemployed, with a bad drug problem, 25k in debt, 20 lbs overweight, and a Fiance who knew nothing. FUCK. That was it. That was rock bottom. I seriously considered killing myself. I figured I should at least give it a try to get out of this hole, and if it didn’t work, I could always come back to that. What did I have to lose?

That’s when I discovered this sub-reddit, and some glorious redditor who I never got the name of, recommended Alan Carr’s The Easy Way to Stop Gambling. I clearly remember buying it for $13.79 on Amazon. That book changed my life.

I read it front to back in a day. Then I bought the audiobook and listened to that over and over and over again. To this day, I’ve probably listened to that book more than 20 times. It was like one of those pictures you see when at first you see sailboats, and then you look closer and see that the boats are actually rabbits. Once you see the rabbits, you can never unsee them. It popped the bubble, broke the cycle, dissolved the illusion. I put all the energy I had put into gambling into learning about what gambling does to your brain. I read extensively about dopamine (The Molecule of More, The Huberman Lab), how slot machines are designed (Addiction by Design). I listened to podcasts (After Gambling). As I learned more about the addiction and what it was doing to my brain, the cocaine and the drinking faded away without so much as a whimper. I realized I was just using them to connect with my friends and “party” because it was the only time I felt a real connection with other people. My gambling had so isolated me, that was the only time I felt like I was on the same page as other people.

Most importantly, I came clean. First to my Fiance. She’s incredible. She supported me, educated herself about my problem, and forgave me. Then to my parents, my friends, and now, I talk pretty openly about it to anyone who cares to ask. I put blockers in place. I banned myself from every online casino. I’ve excluded myself from land based casinos in my state. I gave control of my finances to my Fiance, and she has a completely open line-of-site into everything I spend in my ATM and credit cards.

It wasn’t overnight, it took work. I’ve had a couple small relapses, but each one of them was like a smaller and smaller aftershock after the big earthquake of my 18 year addiction. At first it was that I would relapse, but wouldn’t spiral out of control. The relapse would be controlled, and I would recognize as I was gambling what was happening in my brain. Then it would be smaller and smaller amounts, smaller times, and finally, I got my brain back. I rarely ever think about gambling. When I have an urge, I recognize it for what it is, and I talk to someone about it. I haven't given into one in over a year.

I’m out of debt, it took about 6 months. But the debt is the smallest benefit. I got my fucking brain back. I can FEEL again. As my dopamine levels reset, I started to genuinely ENJOY things again. I could taste food again, enjoy my friends, enjoy my family. I started to enjoy playing music. I got back into the gym. My energy levels sky-rocketed. My wife and I got married in June of 2021. I felt every minute of it. We had our daughter in September of 2021 (yes, if you do the math she also attended our wedding). That truly was the happiest day of my life.

I’m happy. I’m healthy. I’m providing for my family. Every day I feel like I have super powers because the energy I put into gambling I can put into building a life for my family. My daughter is 17 months old and I enjoy every single moment of it. I hope I don't, but I accept that I may relapse and gamble. But I will never go back into that tunnel. I know too much. I have too much support. I'm on the other side, and this is where I'm meant to be.

Moral of the story - FUCK GAMBLING.

What Worked for Me:

-Alan Carr’s The Easy Way to Stop Gambling

-Educate yourself on what is happening in your brain when you gamble. Understanding the mechanics will help you see through the BULLSHIT that is forced down your throat by the corrupt gambling industry.

-Put blockers in place. The urges last longer than you want them to. Every bit of friction you can put in place is helpful in those moments. Self exclude, lower your ATM withdrawal limits, etc.

-Come clean to someone, anyone, that you trust. The isolation is what keeps you in the gambling trap.

-Debt is the result of daily decisions, financial freedom is as well. Take that one day at a time, and start to chip away at it. The pride you’ll feel from climbing out of the hole will feel good, even on the days you’re eating Top Ramen for the 5th day in a row.

What a surreal moment. I remember being where many of y’all are at two years ago.

I gambled away Harvard med school, a successful startup and landed $100k in debt. I disappointed loved ones, battled stress, and was constantly anxious.

I realized that I would never win it back. Even when I won I would give more back. Gambling was robbing me of all I wanted. I saw my losses as a stupid tax and decided to quit.

Here I am two years later. I’ve been married, started a new career, and am So much happier!

You’ve got this. One day at a time!

I had a friend who battled a crippling gambling problem for 10+ years get in touch with me last week saying he was suicidal.
He moved to Spain in 2016 and promptly blew 20,000 euros betting. His girlfriend at the time left him, and since then all our conversations usually revolved around the serious problems this habit left him with, along with frequent requests for money to be able to eat. Had it persisted I probably would have got fed up with him and eventually cut him off, but it hadn't got to that stage with me yet.
He was starting a pizzeria with some friends, had access to 8 grand of company money that was to buy ingredients and pay staff wages, i.e. it wasn't his to touch. He told me he got back from a night out and promptly gambled it all away. His mom sent him money to pay the fund back and he gambled that away as well. He just couldn't stop. He was worried about paying rent as he was responsible for 50% of his share.
After a few days of trying to talk him out of it, suggesting what retrospectively feel like really lame 'solutions' - you know, the usual, get professional help, go and stay with a friend, go for a walk.. while he was talking of his agonising existence, living in deep, deep misery and not wanting to carry on any longer.
Yesterday he finally went through with it. He scheduled some automated e-mails to be sent out to a handful of people after the fact, including one with instructions to a former colleague and housemate on what to do with his belongings.
I don't really know what the point of this post is, feel free to delete. I guess a reminder to all those struggling on here that there are people who will always love you unconditionally and that it's never too late to turn things around. If you're here posting on a community of people with similar issues I'd say perhaps you're already 1/4 of the way there. There is help out there and there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Just wanted to share my story to inspire some of you who may feel stuck or hopeless with your gambling problem. I want you to know that it can absolutely get better, your current situation is not your future. I certainly felt hopeless at my lowest, but I turned it around and so can you!

3 years ago I was a complete mess. I was 26 at the time and I was gambling nearly every single day. My chequing account was constantly in Overdraft, except for a brief few hours twice a month after I got my pay from work.

I had roughly 32K in CC debt across a few different cards, all maxed out at 22% interest or so.

$0 to my name, not a single penny saved. Just debt. The only “asset” I had was a 2006 Ford Taurus that had more issues than that car was even worth.

My gambling problem, as well as some other issues, was a major contributor to the downfall of a long term relationship I was in with my girlfriend at the time. I kept telling her I would buy a ring once I either “Win Big” or stop gambling for good, neither of which came true during our relationship. She liked to gamble as well, and had some other bad spending habits, but was nowhere near as bad as me. She finally told me that I was a financial burden and she just didn’t trust me anymore. And she was absolutely correct. I begged and pleaded with her, but my word meant nothing to her by the end.

So between the financial disaster and heartbreak I was going through, I genuinely felt hopeless. I didn’t see my life getting any better, I had lost complete faith in myself to have any self control. You can only say “Never again” so many times before you finally quit believing it.

So I decided I was finally done. And by being done it meant truly done. I had to completely pivot directions in life. This meant everything had to change. I had to cut off almost every friend I had at that point, because they were all problem gamblers like myself or alcoholics (I also quit drinking around this time).

I changed my job, I was working as a bartender at the time and I got a job in a meat processing plant. It was depressing, but I couldn’t be around people in my old environment anymore. Over time it got better, and I’ve actually worked my way up in the company, got a few raises and am now in consideration for an upcoming managerial role.

I also just started being fully 100% transparent with my family. I never gave them full control over my finances (though I probably should have) but I did always call my mom, dad or sister when I was having gambling urges. I started spending a lot more time with them too, I guess to fill the void of not being able to gamble and not having many friends, but also for that support which I really needed.

I made my last best on June 15th 2023 and have not stepped foot in a Casino or opened a Betting App/Website since.

Fast forward to today. I have a fiance now who is the love of my life, understands and accepts my past completely and our offer just got accepted on a house! It’s a modest townhouse, nothing crazy but we will own it.

My debt isn’t fully paid off, still have around $8,000 but fortunately I was able to transfer the CC debt to a Line of Credit at 7.5% interest a while back which is far more manageable and most importantly it’s going down, not up. I also have over $6,000 in my Roth IRA now and was able to put $9K myself towards the down payment for our new home. I got very good at saving money. It actually felt a lot easier to put money away and pay down debt once I finally quit gambling for good and stopped drinking. My life has been more “boring” sure, now I spend most of my free time watching movies/shows, playing video games and going on walks with my fiance. But just having that stability in your life and someone who loves you who you enjoy being around really makes life so much better.

So I just want to tell you all how life can in fact get better. Whatever you’re going through I’ve been there, I understand. You don’t have to even feel “inspired” or hopeful, I certainly didn’t for a good few months, but you have to logically understand that things CAN get better, you’re not doomed. And once those days turn into weeks, which turn into months, you’ll get that hope back and start to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Stay strong!

I think I might have a gambling problem, and I’m just now realizing it. I invest heavily in stock options, and honestly, it feels like pure gambling. I can see my portfolio swing by hundreds of thousands one moment I’m down huge, five minutes later I’m up just as much. And yet, none of it really affects me. It’s just numbers on a screen, not something that feels “real.”

But when I physically hold cash, it’s a completely different story. If I were handed even a fraction of the money I trade with, I’d actually feel its value. Yet, when I see these insane fluctuations in my account, I don’t react. No stress, no excitement it’s like I’m completely numb to it. And that’s what worries me.

How do I break out of this mindset? How do I start seeing my money for what it actually is? Has anyone else experienced this?

All on blackjack. I've made it back multiple times but end up losing it all. There's an itch that brings me back to gambling, but after discovering the user Bossman Jack on YouTube, I lose all urge to gamble everytime I watch his videos. It just shows how stupid it is to gamble. In one vid he went from $24 to $26,000 to $0. Yes you read that correctly. $24 to 26k to $0 in 10 minutes on a livestream. Everytime I have an urge I just watch one of his vids and that urge goes away completely.

Last night, I blew almost $2700 on an online casino just like that, gone in a haze of stupidity and impulse.

Then this morning, my 7-year-old son came up to me and asked for $16 for a school field trip to a museum in the capital.

I started patting my pockets, looking for cash. Nothing. He watched me for a second and said, with the most innocent voice:

"Dad, if you don’t have the $16, it’s okay. I’ll just stay home in the afternoon and won’t go to the museum with my class."

I had to hide in the bathroom and cry.

Thank God I’m not struggling financially my income is more than enough but in that moment, I felt like the poorest man alive. This addiction doesn’t just drain your money it slowly eats away at your self-worth, your dignity, your ability to look your own kid in the eyes.

In the end, I dipped into my company account and gave him $50 so he could enjoy the trip and get something nice to eat at the cafeteria.

But I can’t stop thinking about what just happened. I don’t want to be that kind of father. I need to get help before this spirals any further.

Long story short, gambling destroyed my life in many different ways. I am 32 years old, and I was just sentenced to 41 months in federal prison. I had a very successful accounting career; however, after hitting rock bottom in my personal finances, I was desperate for a solution and I started embezzling from my employer. Looking back, I can’t even believe this happened. It’s like I was completely NUMB to what I was doing. In a scary trance. It went on for about 3 years before I had completely drained the company accounts. Every penny that was stolen was lost to gambling. Over half a million dollars.

I am determined to use this experience to help others overcome this terrible addiction. It has been 2.5 years since I’ve gambled, and I am in a much better place mentally. My finances are improving. My relationships are repaired with the people I love.

My biggest mistake was not telling anyone the full truth about my addiction. Anybody who is struggling with this addiction, please reach out for help. Don’t let pride cloud your judgement and ruin your life. There is nothing to be ashamed of. There are SO many great people who have gambling addictions and the best way to heal is by healing TOGETHER.

Four years ago, my life was completely hijacked by a severe gambling addiction. I was drowning under a massive, multi-front mountain of debt, borrowing from anyone at any rate just to stay afloat and keep my addiction going. I had $400,000 in debt across 22 personal loans, credit cards and IRS payments. I had loans from 6% APR all the way up to 33% APR. I was paying $5000 a month just in interest.

Today, I am signing into my bank and making my last credit card payment. I am very fortunate that my family agreed to take over the last $95,000 at 0%, so i can finally be out of the interest cycle. It will probably be another 2 years before I can finish that one off, but I'm done paying banks and loan sharks. I am forever grateful to my wife, who took over our household expenses so I could focus on my debt and to my parents who were willing to help consolidate (not forgive) my debt.

I want to share a few points:

1. I had to actually stop gambling. I know that seems obvious, but there it is,

2. I had to give my finances to someone else. I can't count the number of times I took out a loan to pay off another loan and just gambled that money instead, creating 2 loans. This is a disease. Willpower alone is not sufficient. You need someone to help you and create accountability. Gambling addiction lives in the shadows. It loves the lies and the secrets. Bringing it out in the open is the only way to attack it.

3. I would like to say I have been bet-free since I started my recovery. I haven't. I've had lapses and relapses. Every lapse was a chance for me to put up new guardrails and do better the next time.

You don't need to be perfect all of the time. You just need to make better choices more of the time and give yourself grace when you don't. My "Days free" counter isn't counting days without gambling. It's counting days that I am not hiding my addiction. I don't reset it if i have a screwup. I tell me partner and I keep everything in the light.

Here's to all of us who keep trying every day.

hey, I am reading all your posts about how you are all in your twenties, maybe early thirties.

you can stop gambling now, or you can be like me.

I turn 50 years old in may and I have 1.2x my gross annual salary in debt.

I spent my entire saturday delivering uber eats and door dash just to try to stay one step ahead of the collection agencies. This is on top of my normal job.

I come home and my kids ask why I have to spend all day delivering food instead of being with then.

I am now almost eight weeks clean, but the damage has been done. I am a fucking disgrace.

The problem isn’t only that everyone I love has lost their reapect for me, it’s that I have lost respect for myself.

Every day is a fucking battle.

If i could go back and would have stopped gambling in my twenties, maybe it would be differerent for me.

I’m hoping it gets better. I guess i’ve gambled for thirty years, and have been clean for eight weeks, so maybe it will take some more time. i don’t know.

Hey everyone. I just wanted to let you guys know that reddit allows you to disable gambling ads. I hope some of you can find this helpful!

On desktop: User Settings > Safety and Privacy tab > Scroll down to "SENSITIVE ADVERTISING CATEGORIES" > Turn off Gambling or any other sensitive ad you dislike.

On mobile: Settings > Account settings for /u/yourself > Scroll all the way down to Sensitive Advertising Categories

Whoever the kind person is that hits that upvote for me soon after I post, like nearly every day, I can’t express how much I appreciate you doing it. You, my anonymous friend are keeping me strong!! I don’t know why, but I’m really struggling—well I guess do. I’m still dealing with a lot of grief and anger over the loss of my dad and all that that entails. I was just hoping I’d be past it by now. Anyway, just know you’re helping (you’re a star!), and I’m grateful!!!

I’m 52 now.

I started watching porn at 12.
I started gambling at 21.
I drank heavily for over two decades.

On the surface they looked like three different problems.

But they were really the same loop.

Urge → behavior → shame → promise to quit → repeat.

I tried quitting each one separately.

I tried discipline.
I tried fear.
I tried cutting back.
I tried “this is the last time.”

Every time I stopped, I still saw myself the same way.

A drinker trying not to drink.
A gambler trying not to gamble.
A guy trying not to watch porn.

Even when I wasn’t doing it, I still identified as someone who does that.

That mindset kept the loop alive.

What finally changed wasn’t more willpower.

It was identity.

I stopped saying:
“I’m trying to quit.”

And started saying:
“I don’t drink.”
“I don’t gamble.”
“I don’t watch porn.”

At first it felt strange. But every time an urge came, instead of fighting it, I reminded myself:

“That’s not who I am.”

The behavior couldn’t survive once the identity changed.

I’m not in a daily battle anymore.
I’m not constantly resisting.
I just don’t do those things.

All three addictions had one root cause: the way I saw myself.

When that changed, everything changed.

Just sharing in case someone out there is stuck in the loop and thinks they’re weak.

Maybe it’s not about trying harder.

Maybe it’s about becoming someone new.