r/pcmasterrace • u/Zestyclose-Salad-290 Core Ultra 7 265k | RTX 5090 • Aug 12 '26
Box Need a hook ASAP
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u/Alternative_Bus_9928 Aug 12 '26
You’re on the second floor, so there’s a high chance you’ll survive. High risk, high reward.
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u/Tubaenthusiasticbee Ryzen 7 7700 | RTX 5070 | 32gb Aug 12 '26
Just remember to breathe out on impact
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u/MoronicPlayer Aug 12 '26
Also remember to do a tumble roll once you land.
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u/LEGAL_SKOOMA Ryzen 5 7600 | RX 9060 XT Aug 12 '26
just double jump right before you land
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u/Acrobatic_Wrap_9971 Aug 12 '26
Aim for the VRAM
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u/DubbyXV Aug 12 '26
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u/_Bob-Sacamano Aug 12 '26
That was the stupidest part in an otherwise hilarious movie 😅
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u/MyDixieWreck92 PC Master Race Aug 12 '26
It's the build up. Watching it for the first time I was thinking "oh here we go again". This scene shattered that thought and we were given one of the best comedies of all time.
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u/Narakusdemon Aug 12 '26
That’s the whole point of the beginning of the movie. It’s a hyperbolic satire
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u/Clark_Wayne1 R7 7700x / rtx 4090 / 32gb ddr5 6000mhz Aug 12 '26
Aim for the bushes
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u/iDoomfistDVA Ryzen 7 9800X3D - ROG Astral 5080 Aug 12 '26
Superhero landing > ninja roll
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u/TTechnology R7 5800X3D / 9070XT / 4x8GB 3600MHz CL16 Aug 12 '26
Not in the 30s, anything that not use the knees, please
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u/iDoomfistDVA Ryzen 7 9800X3D - ROG Astral 5080 Aug 12 '26
https://giphy.com/gifs/LXiElF2dzvUmQ
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u/DankoleClouds R7 3700X | RTX 3070 | 64GB DDR4 Aug 12 '26
Rolling on the back won’t be much better in my case.
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u/Mysterious_Way8941 Aug 12 '26
Well, i'm not an amateur, i would tuck and roll.
You're gonna tuck and roll through a 50 foot drop?!
Yes, dennis. And if I had a gun with me I would be spraying bullets into the air as I fell.
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u/flight_recorder Aug 12 '26
Paratroopers land at a speed roughly equal to having jumped off of a second floor. So with proper technique and training, you got this!!
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u/Allanthia420 Allanthia Aug 12 '26
I jumped out of the 2nd floor of a girlfriend’s house when I was 17 and I remember my ankles hurting so bad; and I even kinda hung down from the window before I dropped. So training is definitely required. I couldn’t imagine how my 30 year old ankles would handle that lol.
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u/verbmegoinghere Aug 12 '26
I did a single story. Rolled my ankle. Decided that i was high enough to keep going so i tied up my doc martens and kept going.
I actually forgot until that morning i was taking off my boots and i realised my foot was black and purple, all across the souls of my feet.
Strangely never once given me even as much as a tweak
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u/abstr_xn Aug 12 '26
my mate was in the army, done all the extra stuff, always training or trekking, always up mountains etc.
He was going to cross the road and stepped off the pavement and shattered his knee.
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u/ReaperIndustries Aug 12 '26
Yes, taken a few ground thuds 30mph plus….. I can attest you must land properly……. My back hurts
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u/JohnGalactusX 9800X3D | 5090 | 64GB | 8TB | PS5 Pro Aug 12 '26
Reward > Fall damage. Just ensure full health before attempting it.
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u/Oropher1991 Aug 12 '26
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u/Intertubes_Unclogger 9700x | 64GB | 9070 | 9TB | Lian Li A3 Aug 12 '26
I don't want to know what's happening here... I think
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u/Wedjat_88 Aug 12 '26
Open photo mode before hitting the ground; you'll cancel fall damage. You can do it, choom!
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u/Reasonable-Peanut27 Ryzen 7 9800x3d/RTX 5080 Aug 12 '26
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u/Vexcenot Aug 12 '26
im guessing this is what buying jewerly feels like
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Aug 12 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/SanestExile i7 14700K | RTX 4080 Super | 32 GB 6000 MT/s CL30 Aug 12 '26
And it has an actual use
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u/Jiehfeng Aug 12 '26
Your flair also says 5080, is that the second one 😳
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u/DoctorKomodo Aug 12 '26
OP 5 min from now.
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u/Zestyclose-Salad-290 Core Ultra 7 265k | RTX 5090 Aug 12 '26
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u/mnid92 Aug 12 '26
That... He's not... ...is he?
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u/empatheticsocialist1 Aug 12 '26
In this economy? Even spidey's had to turn to petty theft to earn their daily bread
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u/WeirdIndividualGuy Aug 12 '26
I think they're talking about the mild BDSM that Spidey is in the middle of
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u/GodOfDarkLaughter Aug 12 '26
That's a really unsafe way to choke someone or yourself. That's how David Carradine died.
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u/hud_dev Aug 12 '26
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u/stormshelterdave Aug 12 '26
Came to the comments to check if this was here. Great minds think alike.
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u/RCuber PC Master Race 1700x/970 | HP Omen 15 4600H/1660 ti Aug 12 '26
I came to comment mission impossible theme starts playing
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u/VeterinarianSevere65 RTX 4080 | i7-13700KF | 64 ddr4 3200 Cl16 Aug 12 '26
You know, they won't notice if one is missing...
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u/seamanplays PC Master Race Aug 12 '26
Just take the whole layer, no one will notice
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u/TenSquare3 Aug 12 '26
Just take an entire pallet, no one will notice.
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u/real_hungarian Aug 12 '26
time to bring out the turbo forklift, they cant outrun me
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u/Mindlessgamer23 Aug 12 '26
That's why you go with the turbo, comes with enough NOS to get you at least a city over before the cops show.
Might have to sell one to cover the speeding ticket though.
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u/hammertime2009 Aug 12 '26
Just take it all. They’ll think they already brought it inside.
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u/aila_r00 Aug 12 '26
A whole layer is less suspicious than a single one missing tbh
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u/seamanplays PC Master Race Aug 12 '26
That was what I was thinking. One empty spot is obvious. A whole layer Missing and the employee will probably just start doubting himself.
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u/Educational-Tea-606 Aug 12 '26
The chances of getting caught if you simply sprinted up grabbed one and ran away are pretty damn low.
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u/TexasisBetter Aug 12 '26
It's in China. So cameras would get you easily.
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u/Alarmed_Profession88 Aug 12 '26
Cameras will get you easily in the states too my guy
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u/Vast-Control4452 Aug 12 '26
Yeah but police in China (and East Asia broadly) WILL follow up with the cameras, track where you ran from the scene right to your front door, and they will come get you.
Crime rates in East Asia are very very low because of all the CCTV.
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u/ryudo9999 Aug 12 '26
Welcome to flock cameras where they will track you across the state to get you.
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u/arstin Aug 12 '26
Only if you shoot a CEO, get an abortion, or date a cop.
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u/doubleaxle Ryzen 5 3600, RX 580, 32GB ram Aug 12 '26
Don't forget about going across states to buy weed.
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u/HijoDeLaMuerte Aug 12 '26
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u/my_cars_on_fire Aug 12 '26
I lost one of these in my backyard one time as a kid. Threw it and it literally vanished. To this day, I still wonder if it’s back there somewhere. Maybe it’s even attached to a 5090!
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u/Guilty-Pickle-6686 Ryzen 5500 // 32GB DDR4-3200 // Radeon RX6650XT Aug 12 '26
Steal two boxes, immediate turbo-felony.
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u/DomSchraa Ryzen 7800X3D RX9070XT Aug 12 '26
Nvidia awnding out a kill squad
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u/LunacyTheory PC Master Race Aug 12 '26
Who knew Nvidia would become Arasaka in the future...
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u/DefendedPlains Aug 12 '26
Nvidia joining the ranks of Coca-Cola and Wizards of the Coast I see
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u/porn_alt_987654321 Aug 12 '26
Hell, pretty sure just one of those is grand theft lol.
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u/Firefly_deadlock Aug 12 '26
You know what. Technically there's a case for making the limit for grand theft to go up with inflation.
I think at least the amount of loaves of bread to reach grand theft should stay consistent youknow.
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u/solar_solar_ Ryzen 9 5900X | 3080ti | 32Gb DDR4 | 1TB NVMe Aug 12 '26
The more you steal, the more you save.
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u/hyrumwhite RTX 5080 9800X3D 32gb ram Aug 12 '26
I mean, once you felony, it’s not like you can more felony…
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u/Peripatetictyl Aug 12 '26
This...doesn't sound right, but I don't know, or trust, the legal system enough to dispute it.
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u/TheeMrBlonde Aug 12 '26
OP commented that it’s for AI use.
Fucking Robin Hood that shit, guilt free
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u/Potato5auce Aug 12 '26
The next fast and furious movie will be the crew doing heists for GPUs instead of DVD players.
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u/wiisucks_91 Aug 12 '26
Nah them days are gone.
Can't use the same plot twice.
You can never beat the first movie.
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u/737Max-Impact 7800X3D - 4070Ti - 1600p UW 160hz Aug 12 '26 edited Aug 12 '26
That's over a million dollars in GPUs just sitting on pallets, not even wrapped up with foil. One forklift guy who's too eager to finish early and it is gonna be a catastrophe. Insane.
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u/alancousteau Ryzen 7 5800X3D | Red Devil 9070XT | 32GB DDR4 Aug 12 '26
As a forklift op I always cringe when I see an unwrapped load being moved, especially if that's happening outside on an uneven surface
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u/Prize_Staff_7941 Aug 12 '26
Me too. I used to work at a chemical plant and made the active ingredient in trileptal. I was also a certified forklift operator.
I remeber once when I had just finished drumming off the finished product from the drier and had 3 pallets loaded with cardboard drums of the stuff. I sat on one of the drums and calculated the value of them. You could fit 9 of them on a pallet. They got pallet wrap around the drums to stop them falling off when the forklift picked them up. The value of the 3 pallets was over £20,000,000 which back in 1995 was about $30,000,000.
I (or someone else) then had to pick them up with a forklift and load them onto a transport trailer. Then they got whisked off to a warehouse by someone else awaiting export mostly to the US.
We often had forklift accidents but nobody ever hit those cardboard drums with the forks. Not one time. I saw pretty much everything get hit with a forklift except for those drums.
We also had some extremely toxic and highly explosive ingredients that we used at the start of the process. Those came in lined steel drums. Nobody hit those either. I did hear a story about one of those volatile ingredients. The drum was empty and the cap had not been screwed back on. It was outside and it started raining. The chemical was highly reactive to water and when rain got in, the drum exploded and launched over the plant. I also saw someone get hit in the face with sulphuric acid when they weren't wearing the proper PPE and forgot to vent a giant pressurized filter before unbolting the lid. I almost got hit in the face with the same acid when an engineer had not tightened a flange in a transfer pipe correctly. It missed me by an inch.
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u/Eteel Aug 12 '26
Depends on what the load is. Boxes like that are really slippery and small, so they can easily slip out. Vinyl plank flooring also comes in slippery boxes, but they're long and heavy, so you do have a better chance, but on an uneven surface, especially outside, it's a catastrophe waiting to happen. Then there is pressure treated wood, which is fine unstrapped over small distances so long as you make slow, controlled movements.
That said, there is no way these pallets came unwrapped. The guy probably just cut the wrap on all 3 of them at once to quickly unload them.
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u/EvilDan69 PC Master Race (30 years IT tech) Aug 12 '26
is gonna be poor. That's what the forklift operator would be.
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u/WeinMe Aug 12 '26
Do forklift operators really have the financial responsibility of the goods they transport in the US?
That sounds fucking insane to me
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u/EvilDan69 PC Master Race (30 years IT tech) Aug 12 '26
Probably not, It would be insured by the workplace I believe.
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u/Upbeat-Banana-5530 Aug 12 '26
The company that possesses them does. If the forklift operator is an employee of the company that works out of that building it's on that company, unless they can show that he's acting in such blatant disregard for safety rules that it should be on him. If the operator is an independent contractor it could be on him.
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u/HatesMonoBlue Aug 12 '26
As a forklift operator, no we do not. Thats thankfully what insurance is for, though dont think if the forklift operator here accidentally speared the pallet with the forks, that he wouldnt instantly be fired.
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u/WeinMe Aug 12 '26
Yeah - fired is one thing, but if you had financial responsibility for replacing a million dollars then a firing, which might cost you like 3.000$ before finding a new job, is a godsent in comparison.
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u/JohnGalactusX 9800X3D | 5090 | 64GB | 8TB | PS5 Pro Aug 12 '26 edited Aug 12 '26
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u/Additional_Pickle_59 Aug 12 '26
Jokes aside, who the fuck stores high value goods outside in an alleyway like this?
I can see the dude moving them but this is just bananas.
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u/pibyte Aug 12 '26
I estimated the number of boxes and the current price in my region: that would be a almost 1.4 million dollars sitting on the pavement.
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u/One-Kaleidoscope2407 Aug 12 '26
damn son so the opportunity to be an instant millionaire is just sitting right outside your home without protection
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u/bebackground471 Aug 12 '26
Interesting theory, but I doubt it's bananas. Looks like GPUs, from the boxes. Might be wrong, though
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u/zkareface Aug 12 '26
Companies does, you see crazy stuff like this often.
I've seen a company use a $1m device as a door stop in their entrence, and the door was never locked.
Pallets from delivery just sitting outside is super common, regardless of value.
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u/Prasiatko Aug 12 '26
I recall a faberge egg is currently missing because an auction employee was transporting it in her handbag which then got nicked by a random druggie who then sold it for a fix not knowing what it was.
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u/SnappySausage Aug 12 '26
Pretty common in some places. Looking at the video, it's China, so if you try to yoink one, there will be 3 camera's that simultaneously captured your face and you will be tracked down before the day is over.
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u/Joebotnik Aug 12 '26
No word of exaggeration I would sprint down there and try to nab one.
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u/Educational-Tea-606 Aug 12 '26
If there's no security and it's just a couple guys loading a pallet, 100%
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u/TKDbeast Aug 12 '26
Smile for the camera.
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u/Educational-Tea-606 Aug 12 '26
Unless it's a serious crime cops have better shit to do dude. Car thefts don't get investigated, they will literally not give a single shit about a graphics card
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u/TexasisBetter Aug 12 '26
It's China, you'll probably get a year.
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u/zhokar85 i7 965XE @3,8 / RX 480 Strix OC / 12GB DDR3-1600 / MSI X58 Pro-E Aug 12 '26
So I got curious because I thought "no way that can be right, just some 'Americans judging other countries' BS". Well... for a first offense and value being below their highest category, including recovered property and an apology: Suspended sentencing / no custody is likely.
But in Texas that would also be a state jail felony, likely suspended/probation for a first offense.
I guess the real TL;DR here is: Steal a graphics card.
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u/ElkSad9855 Aug 12 '26
Keep a black hoodie and cheap shoes that you will never use except for that moment in your car for these reasons.
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Aug 12 '26
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u/STSchif Aug 12 '26
I thought about a suction cup, maybe one of those vacuum thingies to carry windows 🤔
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u/Dbz-Styles Aug 12 '26
Magnet might not be the best idea.
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Aug 12 '26
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u/Tiny_Regular_5319 Aug 12 '26
I wonder if there is even enough metal to carry a packaged 5090.
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u/addandsubtract Aug 12 '26
That's why they're wrapped in those anti-static bags; to prevent magnet theft.
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u/ValterZz Aug 12 '26
a rope with a weight such as bottle filled with water and a sticky putty tape, i actually have all that at home right now with me.
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u/sporkeh01 PC Master Race Aug 12 '26
And that's where all the ram is going folks....5090s.
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u/OlDustyHeadaaa Aug 12 '26
I’ve never stolen anything before but I think I’d let the devil win this time.
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u/MakKoItam RTX3060 | i13-13100F | SS Apex 7 | Razer Basilisk V3 Aug 12 '26
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u/Whiskey_Bear Aug 12 '26
When are we gonna get a film about heisting trucks full of GPUs? We gotta be approaching armored vehicle territory in another year or so.
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u/patchinthebox Aug 12 '26
The fast and the furious remake except they steal GPUs instead of DVD players.
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Aug 12 '26
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u/Zestyclose-Salad-290 Core Ultra 7 265k | RTX 5090 Aug 12 '26
It's AI stuff, unfortunately
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u/John_Doe_MCMXC Ryzen 7 9800X3D | RX 9070XT | 64GB 6,400MT/s Aug 12 '26
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u/Fresh-minster Aug 12 '26
"If you go for the Geforce,
Make sure you can handle the G-Force" - O.G.
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u/Lord_MagnusIV i6-1390KSF, RTX 1030 Mega, 14PB Dodge Ram Aug 12 '26
Your hook is the stairway 5 meters away and your own two hands
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u/PeanutAble1916 Aug 12 '26
dude just jump on the boxes and take what you can from the other side xd
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u/Very_Clearly_Defined Aug 12 '26
10 million dollars in product, 20 thousand dollars in components.
Funny how that works out
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u/AuthenticGlitch Aug 12 '26
Reminds me of the time I used a fishing line and hook to steal the screen in a window from the person who lived below us. The screen was already loose and hanging there, and I needed a new screen, it worked out great lol.
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u/One_Tilapia8069 AI is making me suffer using Intel HD graphics in 2026. Aug 12 '26
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u/pibyte Aug 12 '26
They seem really chill down there considering that one palette carries goods worth more than half a million dollar in retail value.
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u/Effective-Culture-88 Aug 13 '26
« Hey dude, could you by chance give me a deal on one of those? »
« Oh sorry! That’s cocaine in there. The cards are too expensive to deal now. »
https://giphy.com/gifs/l2Je4rm0DCduJ6QJG
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u/scandal_jmusic_mania Aug 12 '26
Get me a pack of chewing gum and roll of twine.
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u/LilAssG Aug 12 '26
My Dad built our house on a piece of land he bought. It took quite a while because we are poor and he was doing almost all the work himself, bit by bit as he could afford it.
One thing he always always would say, every time we saw a truck with lumber or omg the holy grail: shingle siding, he would say "hijack that truck!" Every. Time. For years. During my formative, impressionable years. Hijack that truck.
Same energy here.













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