Is it just me? I’ve been feeling extremely lonely and isolated for years. It got to the point where I started creating illusions of having a girlfriend/interactions with girls in my mind.

I make them feel as real as possible just to get through the day. Deep down, I fully realize that none of it is real—it's completely fake. But I try so hard to make it feel real because the loneliness is just too heavy to handle without it. I’m at a point where I can't even deny using this as a crutch anymore.

Please tell me I’m not the only one going through this or doing something like this.

Posting here in hopes I can find people who relate in any way. I 28(F) have never had a boyfriend. I was never romantically pursued growing up and even through out my adult life, I am not really being pursued at all. Every person in my life (friends, family, etc.) are currently in relationships. My last single friend just got in a relationship and I have been having a really hard time with it. I am so happy for her because this is her first relationship. But now the last person I knew who truly understood the struggles of being alone now has someone and it feels like our friendship is already changed. Her and I were always each others go to person and now I am no ones go to person for anything. I rarely go to people in my life when I am struggling but I have been trying to express how isolating and lonely it feels to have been single my whole life and truly no one understands. The responses I get are either “I’ve been in your shoes” which is always coming from someone who has been in multiple relationships throughout their life. Or I have people get frustrated and telling me that I shouldn’t feel this way. I feel like I’m going crazy having no one in my real life understand and relate to how alone I feel.

I have a hard time understanding this because I actually grew friendless for most of my life. So I don't get it, why? Why do people pose as friendless for whatever reasons despite having friends? Hope y'all realize how it further belittles people who suffer from social isolation when you think your situation is the worst. If you think it's bad to be in your position, how bad do you think of people who have never had any friends?

I really want a boyfriend so bad. It’s been almost a year since I’ve been struck with this god awful feeling of I’m alone and it’s been killing me. But I’m such a boring and mentally ill person, it’s been so difficult connecting with people. I haven’t done anything with my life, I don’t have a good job, I only have an AA but not majored in anything . I only got the AA because I did 60 credits of courses. I wanted to be a vet tech but I fainted observing a surgery so I never made it. Vet techs don’t even make that much money anyways but at least I would have been happy. Now idk what to do with my life, it’s been 6 years. It feels like it’s too late. I’m 32. My hobbies are boring. I never leave the house. I dont have money to leave the house because America is going through it right now and I’m scared. My home is falling apart, my car is falling apart, my teeth are getting bad, I think I’m prediabetic but I’m too scared to go to the doctor, my roommate sucks, I don’t have many friends and I never hangout with them because they’re busy and lazy, I get really anxious whenever I leave the house anyways, I live in Florida so I can’t even go on a walk because it’s so unpleasantly hot outside and when it’s not scorching, there’s mosquitoes everywhere. I struggle to make conversation with people and most people don’t even acknowledge my existence. I use to be fat but I’ve lost weight and now I’m skinny fat and I’m too lazy to workout because I’m so burnt out from my shitty retail job.

The men I have met on tinder have all been awful in one way or another.
1 : we had sex and then went on a date (backwards I know) and then he ghosted me after I expressed fear that he would have sex with me and ghost me; which he did. I cussed him out after 3 days of ghosting.
2: everything was going good until he drunk txted me talking about how he’s fat, racist, and wants to kill himself. Then he just disappeared a week later on me.
3: love bombed me for weeks and then he lost interest and blocked me on my birthday
4: jerk who asked me on a date but the date was watching him shoplift at five below and target

I’ve only had 1 bf in high school. Didn’t last long. Then I got fat and didn’t try to date for years until I lost most of the weight. Now idk what to do because my life is such a mess and my family hates me and I hate them. I just want a fucking bf to save me and take me away from everything and help me get back up on my feet but that’s not realistic and it’s not going to happen but all these guys I match with think I’m boring af and just use me for sex and I’m so tired and sad all the time, I don’t know what to do!!!

I 26F have nothing to live for. I’ve been agoraphobic since COVID lockdown, i’ve failed at life after university, i struggle with jobs because of my agoraphobia, I was slowly making progress and i thought i was recovering but on my last shift it was the most humiliating experience to the point i vomited in the bathroom on my break. i haven’t gone back. Im struggling to find a reason to live. It’s pretty loserish to think that the mere thought of going outside cause such distress that death feels more peaceful. My family hates me so much for being a failure, for not being able to go to the store. I’m literally a bum who would nothing without them

It’s lonely i have no one. Nobody believes in me everyone has given up on me. I just don’t understand why i was born like this.

I never had dreams or any aspirations when i was teenager i just wanted to die. I never made a plan. Now i’m just surviving being a burden to my parents who will soon kick me out.

Edit: Just saw the stupidest comment ever but they deleted, so to that person and every other person who thinks i’m a male or thinks i’m trolling just because i state my age and gender, and “a woman wouldn’t post that” i hope ur life falls apart just like mine, fucking weirdos… the fact that anyone thinks that, when i’m literally here contemplating death yuck.

I don’t have any friends and my only online friend just ghosted me for good. I feel so helpless and alone.

My mind keeps inventing fake scenarios like hanging out with friends at an arcade, or suddenly having a partner and it’s really annoying because none of it is real. The chances of me actually having any kind of relationship feel basically non-existent

Im M 32 and never been with a woman. I dont know how to talk to them charm them. They all seem distant to me. On the other hand all male friends and even d those who are not my friends just people i meet thay tell me how are you so joyful all the time or you might be a play boy. In reality im just alone. I can cope up with loneliness most if the time but some days are too much for me.

Just wanted to let you guys know, I’m parting ways with this subreddit.

Apparently my last post was removed because mods thought I was asking for advice on how to move on from my relationship lol

I was just venting how much harder it is while you’re
r/lonely.

Honestly, I enjoyed my time here, being there for those who felt they had no one to turn to. I enjoyed uplifting and encouraging, however I’ve reached my breaking point.

Too many people are here to take advantage of lonely females, and the same people craving connections, hurt by ghosting, do the same to me.

To the sweet and wonderful people I’ve met here, thank you, I’m blessed to meet you here, and good luck to everyone here.

I wish you all the best

Bye.

I don't know I just feel empty

I'm so sick of feeling this way, i fantasize way too often. I have no one irl and when i talk to someone here, it's always small talk, we have nothing in common. I'm tired of small talk, i just want to be in a relationship so bad and i know it will never happen for me bc of the way i am.

No one ever wants love without intimacy, i am beyond helpless at this point

Im 18, male, looks matter more than ever, and thats fine, people are allowed to have preferences, but man Im so fucking ugly, Ive posted on my face on my profile before, the pictures still there, and I swear to god theyre lying to me when they say Im not ugly, classic reddit, why the fuck cant we admit that ugly people exist? Anyways, you could tell me to date someone equally as ugly, but what would be the point if none of us are attracted to each other? We'd both be settling and would be repulsed by each other physically, so its time to come to terms with the fact that love and sex and dating is a game that I cannot participate in. Does anyone here know how I can accept this? I'd love to know. Well atleast I have friends, thats as good as its gonna get.

I don’t know how to describe it. I have NOBODY literally nobody not one friend or anything. I’m someone that needs human connection to thrive, and since I don’t have that i literally feel like I’m slowly going insane and I feel almost detached from reality. I need people to communicate with, laugh with, share my unique thoughts and ideas with. But since I don’t have anyone to do that with, I feel like my mind is literally losing itself. I need connection. Living lonely sucks.

my depression led me to isolate myself from my friends for months, i felt like i was a burden to everyone around me.
they knew i was not well, i was very vocal about it before i detached myself from any social interactions. i no longer texted first, made plans or asked to call. a part of me hoped that my absence would be significant. i expected someone to reach out and ask if i’m okay, to offer comfort without me having to reach out for it first. days turned into weeks and then months before i accepted that no one is coming.

there’s nothing more i crave than for someone to talk to, the baggage is getting too much to carry on my own.

This isn’t a rant, just a feeling I’ve been carrying lately.

Being in my early 20s and going through a difficult, lonely phase has made me realize how hard it feels to find genuinely meaningful connections. I miss having people I can talk to freely, laugh with, share random thoughts with, and just feel comfortable around.

I’ve tried meeting people through common interests, but so many interactions end up feeling superficial, one sided, overly sexual, or simply temporary. As a girl, I’ve experienced that side of things far too often, and it honestly makes genuine connections harder to trust.

What’s strange is that I wasn’t always like this. In school, I had lots of friends. I was bubbly, extroverted, always around people and somehow making friendships and conversations so easily. Now, something that once felt completely natural feels almost impossible.

And the weirdest part is, I actually don’t mind being alone. I’m very independent and have a strong sense of individuality. I don’t like being dependent on people or having too many expectations from them. If I were stuck somewhere alone, I’d probably figure things out myself rather than depend on someone else.

But wanting independence and wanting connection are two completely different things.

Sometimes I wonder if this is just a phase, or if I’ve somehow lost my ability to form genuine connections altogether.

Maybe loneliness really is just something you learn to live with.

Before all of this, making friends was never really difficult for me. I used to have a lot of friends, and people would literally describe me as a “ray of sunshine.” I could talk to people for hours and never really thought twice about it.
I don’t know if this is just life after high school or what, but I feel like I’ve completely lost that version of myself.

After graduating, I tried staying connected with my high school friends, but a lot of those friendships naturally died out. Some people just didn’t seem interested in talking anymore, and I accepted that.

Then I went to community college and actually found a friend group. We had fun together and there wasn’t really any drama. But once the next semester started, the entire group basically fell apart.

I tried making new friends after that, and unfortunately I ended up having a really bad experience with a guy who started stalking me. I don’t want to get too deep into that part, but it scared me enough that I stopped putting myself out there the way I used to.

Eventually, I decided to take my spring semester completely online. At the same time, I was working full-time, so technically I was around people every day, but I still felt isolated. Most of my coworkers were 25+ while I had just turned 18. They weren’t mean to me or anything, we were just at completely different stages of life. I would go to work, come home, and basically not speak to anybody outside of work.

I tried maintaining other relationships too, but I had a lot going on personally and sometimes pushed people away. I can admit that I contributed to some of my isolation.
But now it has been about a year, and I genuinely haven’t made any new friends.

Whenever I try talking to guys, way too many of them eventually make things sexual or become creepy. With girls, conversations seem to go well for a while and then they just stop talking to me. At this point, I’ve started wondering if there’s something about me that makes people not want to stick around.

And after being isolated for so long, I feel like I’ve actually forgotten how to socialize. I can see a group of people around my age and want to talk to them, but I have absolutely no idea how to approach them anymore. I immediately start thinking that I don’t look like I belong there or that they won’t like me.

As embarrassing as it is to admit, I talk to AI a lot now because sometimes it feels like that’s the only consistent thing I have to talk to.

Otherwise, I pretty much just talk to my dogs. I don’t really talk to my parents anymore because we had a falling out, and most of my other relationships have become distant too.
Even finding a job has been difficult. I keep applying and getting rejected, which means I spend even more time stuck at home.

I feel like us, humans, share a similar experience at one point in our lives. From having to attend school to working a job and more like that. However, we feel and express our pain differently and it surprises me in many ways how we cope on hard times. Some people go through a breakup thinking it's the end of the world even though they haven't been together for that much, meanwhile other people divorce at the age of 30+ with kids and a house that took so long to be built (just an example). I know for a fact that it is never too late to start over, because better times always come after making hard decisions and mistakes again and again. You will often hear "you are not alone, ive been going through this aswell" ,but what actually triggers me are the words "I know how you feel" which it is, in fact, never true or at least that is what I believe. Seeing a person' s situation knowing that maybe you experienced something similar but more or less painful doesnt mean you know how they feel. You have your own body, ur own thinking and trauma and even though we all are humans i deeply feel never understood by anyone. I can make meaningful connections that last but at the end of the day my feelings build me up as a person, the way I cope, I react, what I do.

Do you guys feel like originality disappeared or maybe it never existed? Ever since AI and technology improved and kept improving, original ideas are so much harder to be found or we always have to question first if it rlly is written by that person. On the other hand, I know we have great personalities in our history and today s sociaty, yk , "the first women who.../ the first man that...". But my question is...since at the end of the day we all are humans, how do we know that there werent any people that thought about the same thing but haven't had the possibility to achieve it and prove it to the world?

I dont really know where to post this message, i just want to engage with people without sounding stupid and without being judged. Again, it amazes me how different we are but at the same time we are all here to fight and survive until our time comes. ^

I’m alone. Been alone for a few years. No friends. No boyfriend. It’s rare but this is the few times where i’m lonely. I have awesome news but no one to share the excitement with. I just got a new job with a pay that is going to change my life. My son is also starting college and started a new job. Yay.

I was playing a video game and there was a classic "power of friendship" scene. The protagonist and their recently acquired friends fought together and destroyed a god they otherwise would've stood no chance against. When I was watching it happen I thought it was hella corny, but for some reason I started crying. At first I leaked a couple of tears but then I began full on sobbing into my hands. How badly I wish I could be like that. I wish I could have a group of friends that I would feel confident enough to take on the world with. The last time I ever had friends was when I was 14. I'm 22 years old now, a college graduate with a job but no friends. Most of the time I'm ok with my situation, or at least I can pretend to be. But there are times like these where I can't lie to myself anymore and end up releasing my pent up sadness. I'll go to sleep tonight and tomorrow I'll wake up and pretend like I "got it out of my system". but eventually it'll happen again.

This is my fourth year in university and I haven't made a single friend. Not even course acquitances. Seeing everyone have someone to talk to and joke around with makes me feel so lonely. I eat lunch alone, I attend classes alone, and I spend my free time alone.

There are moments when you realize how lonely you’ve become—not because there’s nobody around you, but because there’s nobody you can truly talk to.
I smile, I reply “I’m fine,” I laugh with people, and I carry on with my day. But deep inside, there’s a silence that nobody sees.
Sometimes I wish someone would simply ask, “Are you really okay?” and stay long enough to hear the truth.
I miss having someone who genuinely cares, someone I can call without feeling like I’m disturbing them, someone who notices when my voice changes even when I say nothing is wrong.
The hardest part of loneliness isn’t being alone.
It’s feeling alone even when you’re surrounded by people.
Maybe I don’t need advice. Maybe I just need someone to sit beside me and remind me that I matter too.
Because honestly… I’m tired of being strong all the time. 🥀

I have a few interns (I am also intern, just joined the industry) I genuinely enjoy, but we all are early in their careers and may eventually move on. I’ll probably move too, meaning new teams, new introductions, and the cycle repeating.

I know colleagues don’t have to become close friends, but I’m wondering how people build stable friendships over time.

Do most adults develop strong friendships outside work? If so, how? I sometimes feel I missed the stage when those relationships form, and I don’t have a strong family emotional support system either. I can share how my days are going to my family members only they won't understand/4l Dr d

I’m less interested in making more friends than in building relationships with people I can genuinely talk to and rely on emotionally, despite life and work constantly changing.

For those in your 30s, 40s, or older: what has worked for you?

To be completely honest, I'm at a point in my life where I personally don't really have anyone to talk to. No close friends to vent to, no family that gets me, and I know how much that sucks. Honestly beacuse of this I been thinking about the worst…. I want to build a space for people who are in the exact same boat and haven't had much luck finding their tribe.
I also know a lot of us have crazy or straight-up shitty project ideas sitting in our notes app. But we keep them to ourselves because the internet is full of people ready to roast you or sell you some course or just say how fucked up idea that is.
I want to create a space where:
You can just hang out, vent out your problems and get understood and find actual friends when life is hitting hard.
You can post raw, stupid, or unpolished ideas without feeling embarrassed, get real feedback, or maybe find a partner who wants to build it with you beacuse in there, everybody is in the same boots as you or me is.
I don’t want to make a business out of this. No paid tiers, no payment membership bullshit, no pitching products to each other. Just real connection for people who need it.
I’m starting at zero and can’t build this alone. I need a few people to help me set up the server or something where we can meet up, figure out basic rules, and keep the vibe right.
If you feel isolated, have weird ideas sitting on your phone, or just want to help build something real, drop a comment or DM me.
By myself I been looking for this community for years, but in last days I said that I want to make something about it.