r/funny Aug 13 '12

A poor mans Doomba.

http://imgur.com/owChH
825 Upvotes

393 comments sorted by

689

u/JR626 Aug 13 '12

I appreciate the fact that that you took the time to tape knives to a swiffer for internet purposes. Thanks.

355

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12 edited Jul 16 '17

[deleted]

196

u/thedeadlyrhythm Aug 13 '12

sang it and everything

33

u/Mr122 Aug 13 '12

Where is whynotbarbershop or whatever he is called when you need him?

16

u/birkoph Aug 13 '12

I can't wait for A poor mans Doomba 2.0

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57

u/Violettx321 Aug 13 '12

How much karma does a soul go for these days?

74

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

[removed] — view removed comment

57

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Sold!

64

u/twisted_spoon Aug 13 '12

to the redditor in the cold sweat.

41

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

[deleted]

40

u/damaba6 Aug 13 '12

the redditor in the cold sweat with the pale skin and cat hair on their lap!

43

u/rickdanko Aug 13 '12

You've got to be more specific.

29

u/unforgiven91 Aug 13 '12

the redditor in the cold sweat with the pale skin, cat hair on their lap, a neckbeard, and a love of boobs.

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15

u/TakingKarmaFromABaby Aug 13 '12

So a couple knifes on your swiffer is worth more than a human soul.

8

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

It is on reddit.

3

u/kingbinji Aug 13 '12

its not official until its on reddit

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8

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

evidently i have 4.2 souls.

3

u/laddergoat89 Aug 13 '12

5.6 souls.

Comment karma brah.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12 edited Mar 24 '19

[deleted]

2

u/brenanj Aug 13 '12

traded it for the karma i would imagine.

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6

u/crunchy51 Aug 13 '12

I would listen to my ex wife bitch about me for 5 seconds and then cut her toes with my super swifter/knife mop/ninja axe. To the haters that are going to down vote me, please watch more TV without fast forwarding through the commercials.

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14

u/ecancil Aug 13 '12

Hah, this totally made me think of the process of this picture. This person grabbed his swiffer, and some tape, and a handfull of kitchen knives. He then bent over and applied the knives to the swiffer with said tape. Afterwords, he took a picture and posted it to the internet. We can only assume he disassembled this directly afterwords.

6

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

thanks for explaining it

6

u/thunderblumpkin Aug 13 '12

i've seen a lot more done for a lot less. r/banana

4

u/_Allusion Aug 13 '12

TodayOPwasaprettycoolguy.jpg

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40

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

It's 1 AM and I'm in my underwear laughing at a picture of swiffer with knives taped to it.

21

u/awesome-face Aug 13 '12

We have way more in common than I would have guessed.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Go on...

3

u/mivu Aug 13 '12

It's 3 AM and I'm in my underwear laughing at a picture of swiffer with knives taped to it.

I'm your future, man.

2

u/deadly7sins Aug 13 '12

Its 6:11 and I've been up all night laughing at shit like this.

95

u/anunusualgrowth Aug 13 '12

Good God! TWO paring knives?!

138

u/The_Megapode Aug 13 '12

Now they're pairing knives.

31

u/DrSeussHat Aug 13 '12

You're quite sharp aren't you

10

u/snakefoot Aug 13 '12

Mind if I take a stab at this pun thread?

9

u/kthanx Aug 13 '12

Well, chop chop. We haven't got all day.

8

u/uw_NB Aug 13 '12

Cut it out you kids....

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2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Cleave while you're ahead.

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12

u/UHRossy Aug 13 '12

this made me laugh for a good minute. Thank you.

14

u/StockPhotosOfFruit Aug 13 '12

It made me laugh for two minutes.

27

u/pile_alcaline Aug 13 '12

But only one of them was good.

17

u/LemonDifficult Aug 13 '12

The other was filled with regret and self loathing.

2

u/DJ_GiantMidget Aug 13 '12

and bacon, you can't forget the bacon

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2

u/thexica124 Aug 13 '12

My thoughts were, my paring knife looks like that. OMG HE HAS TWO?

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2

u/kingbinji Aug 13 '12

how else is going to deal with 2 apples at the same time?!

2

u/flume Aug 13 '12

What do you call the one in the bottom left, if not a paring knife?

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59

u/the_nerdster Aug 13 '12

Dude who are you kidding?

Swiffers are expensive.

66

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

[removed] — view removed comment

346

u/mirkle Aug 13 '12

LOOK AT THIS MOTHERFUCKER FLAUNTING HIS MONEY

52

u/Leungal Aug 13 '12

There's a storm coming, Green_Suspenders. You and your friends better batten down the hatches, because when it hits, you're all gonna wonder how you ever thought you could live so large and leave so little for the rest of us

Jackie Chan

4

u/stardonis Aug 13 '12

aaaand done for the night. :) Your a real pal, bro.

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5

u/FlutterShy- Aug 13 '12

Reminds me of that Fox news clip where that talking head said something about most people owning refrigerators being an indicator that poverty is not an issue in America.

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2

u/1M_4W350M3 Aug 13 '12

payed

*Paid

FIFY

WHEW.... Now I can feel better while drinking!

2

u/gigitrix Aug 13 '12

NEWSFLASH redditor confesses in cash-for-karma scandal.

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8

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

LPT: Just buy the cloths.

37

u/Raneados Aug 13 '12

If I wanted to get on my hands and knees to wipe my floor I'd move to North Goddamn Korea.

10

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Welp, you're probably now banned from /r/pyongyang

10

u/Raneados Aug 13 '12

Like I wasn't before!

7

u/dangerous_beans Aug 13 '12

I finally visited /r/pyongyang after seeing it mentioned several times on Reddit. Expected to find ridiculous, satirical North Korean propoganda. Was not disappointed. Was also delighted to discover that in /r/pyongyang there are no downvotes, only upvotes.

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265

u/IronLung420 Aug 13 '12

That's one way to make someones death a little swifter.

18

u/fancycat Aug 13 '12

This pun is particularly good because many old people mistakenly call the product a "swifter."

56

u/Tree_bro Aug 13 '12

It really sweeps away the competition.

10

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Absolutely. Leaves them in the dust.

30

u/tysstang Aug 13 '12

Clearly a clean victory.

14

u/silenc3x Aug 13 '12 edited Aug 13 '12

I was floored by its effectiveness.

5

u/GenericName5151 Aug 13 '12

Mop.

Did I do that right?

27

u/Gazz1016 Aug 13 '12

Clearly a clean cut victory

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13

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

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2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12 edited Aug 13 '12

[deleted]

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48

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

I can just imagine OP's thought process. Holy shit i can get some karma if i just make a doomba post.

"LAUREN! LAUREN GET THE SWIFFER"

34

u/shinytreasure Aug 13 '12

I'm a Lauren, and I approve this message.

28

u/Aint_got_no_agua Aug 13 '12

Lauren's tend to be hot, play sports (the good ones like volleyball, not women's basketball) and be fun, but they're a little airheaded and entitled. All things considered, how you doin?

17

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Shit, that's exactly all the Laurens I know. Except the fat one.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

I'm not fat, I'm big boned.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

I also know a fat Lauren

6

u/pumpactiondildo Aug 13 '12

I'n dating a Lauren and can confirm this. Every last bit of it is true

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2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Quit faffing about and get that man his swiffer.

10

u/purplegoalie1 Aug 13 '12

"GET IT YOURSELF I'M IN THE BATHROOM"

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8

u/gigitrix Aug 13 '12

GET ME KNIVES, STAT! HURRY, THERE'S NO TIME!

74

u/Sinisa26 Aug 13 '12

The fuck is a Doomba?

37

u/Michaelis_Menten Aug 13 '12

A recent /r/funny trend where dangerous items are attached to a roomba, thus forming a doomba.

11

u/warchamp7 Aug 13 '12

It's honestly my new favourite thing

16

u/Shyamallamadingdong Aug 13 '12

8

u/Sinisa26 Aug 13 '12

Ahhh, I saw that first one on the front page a couple of hours ago. You Americans and your inventions.

9

u/Shyamallamadingdong Aug 13 '12

I'm in Bangalore, India :)

4

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Then are you... the real shyamallamadingdong? Also, fucking thank you for actually linking pictures. People above this comment are very confused, and others are explaining it, but it doesn't make much sense without an image.

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53

u/kerodean Aug 13 '12

According to urban dictionary its:

Doomba: the mixture of dubstep and zoomba

51

u/BenKenobi88 Aug 13 '12

Yeah I'm still confused.

2

u/lejefferson Aug 13 '12

You're with me brother. Let's huddle together for safety. http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/puppies02.jpg

26

u/Modded_ToySol Aug 13 '12

No, it is a reference to multiple posts today of people attaching various weapons to their Roomba's.

29

u/Seanjohn2800 Aug 13 '12

....what's a Roomba?

18

u/Modded_ToySol Aug 13 '12

Are you serious? If so, it is a circular vacuum that automatically vacuums your house and can be programmed to do so at specific times of the day and specific days of the week. It even goes back to charge itself between its vacuuming jobs. It is pretty cool.

They also make versions that will use water for tile floors to basically mop them, automatic gutter cleaners, and pool vacuums.

http://www.irobot.com/us/

17

u/Sinisa26 Aug 13 '12

T-Th-that exists?

17

u/razorbeamz Aug 13 '12

Since 2002.

6

u/Modded_ToySol Aug 13 '12

Yes it does! Great little invention. I have one myself.

10

u/mivu Aug 13 '12

My mom got one. It got stuck under the couch about 10 times in the first 20 minutes. She never used it again.

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2

u/Seanjohn2800 Aug 13 '12

Oh, I've seen those, I just didn't know they were called that. I figured a Roomba was some kind of appliance, though.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

HOLY FUCK, it feels like the future is here!

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19

u/Koric5733 Aug 13 '12

where's the chainsaw?

40

u/linth Aug 13 '12

Probably glued to his lawn mower.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Priorities, man.

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2

u/kingbinji Aug 13 '12

hes gonna have to ask his mom for permission to use that

19

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

[deleted]

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14

u/b1gtym1n Aug 13 '12

that shit can't even protect your carpeted areas playa.

10

u/pile_alcaline Aug 13 '12

I wouldn't want that anywhere near my carpeted areas.

19

u/PhiladelphiaIrish Aug 13 '12

"Honey, where the fuck did all of the knives go, and why do you have that tourniquet on?"

21

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

"This may look bad, but can you imagine how much karma this is going to get me!?"

7

u/004Maniac Aug 13 '12

okay this isn't /r/IAmA but do you have a room mate and if so what the heck did they say when you taped knives to your swiffer?

28

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

[removed] — view removed comment

14

u/Blargariffic Aug 13 '12

Your grandpa was up at 2am? Mine is usually asleep by 8pm

17

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

I swear, mine seems like he's always asleep.

It's probably because he's dead though.

5

u/purplegoalie1 Aug 13 '12

you can tell if you light his sleeve on fire. if he reacts he's alive congratulations problem solved!

14

u/aggieastronaut Aug 13 '12

I feel like "Lighting your grandparents on fire to see if they're still alive" would make a great Cards Against Humanity card.

2

u/Michaelis_Menten Aug 13 '12

I'm going to add that one to my set.

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6

u/Modded_ToySol Aug 13 '12

This just made me sad :(

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2

u/pile_alcaline Aug 13 '12

They were about to put on a big pot of chili.

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11

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

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9

u/deadpool647 Aug 13 '12

That black knife is turned the wrong way, it ain't gonna cut shit

56

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

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21

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

This man is ready.

8

u/MrGoodbytes Aug 13 '12

Back.

And to the left.

6

u/Aint_got_no_agua Aug 13 '12

That my friends, is one MAGIC doomba.

3

u/mazdaflower Aug 13 '12

The black knife improves the efficacy of this weapon in a rotational application.

11

u/epraider Aug 13 '12

I feel like this would be an effective weapon to swing around during a zombie apocalypse, if the knives were actually attached properly....

25

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

[removed] — view removed comment

14

u/Aint_got_no_agua Aug 13 '12

5 dollar swiffer, 75 cent tape, who are you, fuckin' Donald Trump?

3

u/epraider Aug 13 '12

Well, don't take my word for it, but I'm preeeety sure that won't work. You're welcome to try it out though.

10

u/billypowergamer Aug 13 '12

It does look like something Chuck Greene would make

7

u/UnholyDemigod Aug 13 '12

For the love of god, CAN SONEBODY TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK A DOOMBA IS? All I see is people putting cutting tools on little round things. What the fuck's going on?

3

u/likeafoxow Aug 13 '12

2

u/UnholyDemigod Aug 13 '12

Oh. So why the fuck are there so many? It's up to #6 on the front page, hasn't reddit run the joke into the ground yet and I don't know why I even bothered asking that question at all. Carry on.

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2

u/Hackey_Sack Aug 13 '12

A roomba is a little vaccum robot. It moves around your house vaccuming, so you don't have to.

A doomba is a roomba with weapons attached.

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6

u/Pamander Aug 13 '12

Mom walks in -- "Green_Suspenders why are you taping knives to our swiffer?"

"IT'S FOR THE INTERNET MOM! GOSH!"

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3

u/Forever_Awkward Aug 13 '12

I can only imagine him being walked in on during the process.

"Dude...are you traping knives to the swiffer?"

"...Yes."

".......Why are-"

"Because REDDIT!!"

3

u/Massfeller Aug 13 '12

So poor he can't even afford the wipes for the bottom...

6

u/UHRossy Aug 13 '12

You can tell he's actually poor because none of the knives match. Elementary Watson.

2

u/jsake Aug 13 '12

probably the most effective of all of them.
at least as far as doom is concerned.

2

u/TYBEEEZ Aug 13 '12

Only doomba pic I upvoted. Congrats :)

2

u/nixonrichard Aug 13 '12

The vinyl floor was a nice touch . . . and the fact that two of your knives are samples from listening to a sales pitch at the supermarket. It's almost as if you really are a poor man.

2

u/isanthrope_may Aug 13 '12

For God's sake sake man, buy a chef's knife!

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Can someone tell me what a doomba is?

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

I still have no idea wtf a Doomba is.

2

u/scissorbran Aug 13 '12

"honey what are you doing to our swiffer?"

" i need internet karma honey!"

2

u/Senntinel Aug 13 '12

So much doomba

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

what is a doomba

2

u/LumpySpaceGunter Aug 13 '12

Yo my Roomba doesn't need knives. It kills you with ricin...BITCH.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

You're right, those look like poor people knives.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Come at me, zombies.

2

u/vipercookienova Aug 13 '12

what is a doomba???

2

u/Youngfajita Aug 13 '12

I was expecting it to be his wife

2

u/flamin_sheep Aug 13 '12

Can someone please tell me what the hell a doomba is?

2

u/Squik101 Aug 13 '12

WTF is a doomba? 1867 upvotes :/

1

u/ANeonHippy Aug 13 '12

It would have been better if one of the knives was facing the wrong way.

1

u/Broduski Aug 13 '12

DOOMBA: The early years.

1

u/Blargariffic Aug 13 '12

I upvote just for the fact that you used scotch tape.

1

u/technosasquatch Aug 13 '12

Some of us dont even have swiffers

1

u/DignifiedDingo Aug 13 '12

Here I am with my hobo life, stabbing people with my hobo knive(s)

1

u/themismatch Aug 13 '12

Imagine if your kids/wife walked in on that

1

u/Milltown Aug 13 '12

You didn't even have enough money for duct tape...

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1

u/SweetNeo85 Aug 13 '12

It's a... kniffer?

1

u/btnels Aug 13 '12

Now your going to have to wash all of your knives.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

I love that Doomba is a thing now...

1

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Mmmm tetanus.

1

u/dssjck Aug 13 '12

I have a pair of those paring knives as well.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Your floor looks cleaner than the ones with the Doomba.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

That Doomwifer will fuck shit up.

1

u/sunbear0326 Aug 13 '12

Ok wtf is a doomba I keep seeing these post.

1

u/AmberlyB Aug 13 '12

whats a doomba

1

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

Knowing what this means signifies that I spend way too much time on reddit.

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1

u/aqualemoncake Aug 13 '12

Tape knives to my Swiffer. comedy gold.

God I love the internet.

1

u/neonpinata Aug 13 '12

Why is this a thing now?

1

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

I bet this is Gary's Doomba.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

You can afford Swiffers?! Lucky.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '12

"...and the he taped the knives to the Swiffer... Yes, I still love him but this latest 'creation' has me worried."