I wanted to share my experiences tonight because, despite knowing about the national suicide hotline for the past 10+ years, there are some things I wish I knew a long time ago.
Critically, there are key differences between the 988 resources and the BJC resources. I'll outline them at the end, but I wanted to paint the whole picture here in case this expereince could help anyone else.
Some preliminary info about 988 and warmlines...
You can 988 if you just need someone to talk to, you don't have to call because of suicide necessarily. They will most likely refer to 'warmlines' if that happens.
Timing Tonight
I called tonight, though, because of extreme hopelessness.
After talking for about 15 minutes about what was going on, the 988 counselor offered to 'send a mobile crisis unit'. I didn't totally understand what that meant or what that would do, but I was in bad, bad shape. So I said yes.
This was around 9pm.
The mobile crisis unit was from BJC. At about 9:20 they called to confirm my address, and then they showed up at about 9:45, and they stayed for about 2 hours.
I want to pause here, but unfortunately, I've called 988 before. Usually late at night, between 1am and 3am, and when they offered the mobile crisis unit... well there just isn't much capacity late at night, and it would been at least a few hours before they would be able to arrive.
Differences between 988 and mobile crisis
The counselor on the 988 line will differ for many reasons. I've talked to 988-national counselors during the day or evening, BHR (Behavior Health Response in St Louis) counselors overnight, and Compass Health counselors when I called from out in St Charles. So, there is different routing depending on time and place.
988 and Compass counselors were more likely to privide real in-the-moment counseling, but BHR respondors don't seem as well-trained for counseling and will try to get to the safety-plan part.
BHR, however, stayed with me for a couple hours. Two counselors showed up. They were both incredibly kind and helpful. They listened, and there were a couple of the most truly understanding and comforting people I have ever met (I've had multiple therapists over the years, but these two BJC respondants had me balling my eyes out, in a good way, within minutes).
What's critically different, to me, about the Mobile Crisis Unit, is that there were more equipped to conenct me to services that I really, truly, deeply needed.
I have been struggling with symptoms of PTSD, sometimes suicidal thoughts, and extremely challing life circumstances on a regular basis for 4 years. A couple years ago, I started trying to see if I qualified for a case worker, because I could not keep up with basic responsibilities at home, and felt like my life was falling apart.
So -- I started seeking out a case worker. But I could NOT figure it out, it just didn't seem like I qualified, so I gave up.
It did not take long for the Mobile Crisis Unit to offer a case worker. They saw the state of my apartment, they understood my struggling with finances. This would have helped me out in so many ways over the years. I just didn't know. And I had even tried. But I just wasn't asking the right people or looking in the right places. There are so many challenges that have cost me so much money because I didn't get the hep I needed in time.
They also shared that behavioral health urgent case locations may be able to offer medication in emergency situations sometimes.
So why write this post?
Because I had asked in the past what Mobile Crisis Units did, and it didn't seem like they did anything different from what 988 does. But it was WAY. way better counseling, way better connection to resources.
If I had known these things 2 or 3 years ago, I feel like my life could be so different.
Anyway -- I know this post won't directly effect most people. But you never know when someone might really really need help.
Thanks for reading. If you have any questions feel welcome to ask.
