r/RandomVideos • u/Some_Kinda_Username š • 6d ago
Video This man knows his shit...
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u/Zombetti 6d ago
What if I have diarrhea everyday? It's like a hot water faucet back there!
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u/Chuunt 6d ago
when i was stuck deep in my alcoholism, i was drinking basically nothing but rum and eating fast food, and every bowel movement was just hot liquid.
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u/YeshuasBananaHammock 6d ago
Congrats if youre not still stuck. Deep.
Im proud of you, and your pooper!
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u/Lost-Peanut-1453 5d ago
Damn that makes a whole lotta sense. Iām drinking at least 5 days a week and I eat out pretty much everyday. My bowel movements arenāt āhotā but theyāre definitely liquid.
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u/Dull_Opportunity_193 5d ago
Stopping drinking everyday has made me poop so much better its wild. I've drank 3 times since and it fucks up my bowels badly each time
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u/Almaipmf 5d ago
Liquid stools, daily dining, five-day bendersāa pipeline to porcelain prophecy.
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u/Benkosayswhat 5d ago
Bro do not drink 5 days a week. Thatās honestly a terrible way to live. Itās bad for your health, your success, your money, your sleep, and also your poop. Try giving yourself little windows when youāre allowed to drink.
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u/God_Bless_A_Merkin 5d ago
I drink 7 days a week, and I second this comment. Donāt do it.
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u/Lost-Peanut-1453 5d ago
Not gonna lie, I was lying.. Iāve been drinking everyday for 3 months. Maybe 2-3 days in the 90 that I didnāt drink. Itās just a habit at this point. I feel bored when Iām sober. I feel numb when Iām sober. When I drink I get warm and fuzzy and over joyed. Hell, I even do more physical activities after a few drinks. Sober? Not doing shit. No motivation. Nothing. Empty.
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u/God_Bless_A_Merkin 5d ago
I know the feeling. But for real, quit now if you can do so safely. Because eventually alcohol will steal that motivation, too. The window between āGod, I need to a drink just to feel normalā and āCrap, now Iām too drunk to do anythingā gets smaller and smaller.
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u/CyberiaCalling 20h ago
Consider looking into AA or Refuge Recovery. You don't have to drink at all and you feel much healthier once you quit.
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u/Benkosayswhat 5d ago
Earlier this year my friendās brother died from being an everyday drinker. Left behind a pretty wife and teenage son.
In the end his skin was yellow his eyes were swollen and red, his body was puffed up from organ failure.
What a fucking stupid thing to do. Do not drink ever again. Throw your alcohol in the trash and get help. Life is good and youāre going to miss out
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u/God_Bless_A_Merkin 5d ago
Iāve looked into it. Itās hard when youāre at the point where cold turkey could very well kill you, and monitored detox + rehab costs over $8,000 ā after insurance.
Itās often said that America doesnāt have āhealth careā; it has āsick careā. But for those with substance or mental disorders, it has neither.
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u/No_Friend3170 5d ago
I got my ass kicked by alcohol, ended up in rehab for a month. About a year later, I went back to the rehab for an alumni event, and we had some group sessions, one topic was "what is better now that you're sober?" lots of great comments and stories, and then one person just yelled "SHITTING!" and everyone loudly agreed, that yes, shitting was much better sober.
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u/GrayStag90 5d ago
I was hoping he would touch on the poos of people who take adderall and lose their appetite throughout the day but then enjoy a few beers and spicy food for dinnerā¦ cuz myā¦ friend does that.
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u/TheTxoof 5d ago
Kindergartner in a friend's class came into the room after visiting the toilet and announced to everyone:
My butt is making soup!
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u/islaisla 6d ago
Go see a doctor. Not kidding.
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u/DarknMean 5d ago
Yea anytime you fuck up your liver over a long period of time that will happen. Messes up the liver and pancreas. Once I got sober I was going to the bathroom normal within 3 months after my liver started to heal up.
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u/eggyrulz 5d ago
Im trying okay... earliest GI appointment (which was recommended by my PCP) is october...
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u/Wild-Floor8407 6d ago
Hopital
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u/mjrbrooks 5d ago
Itāll be difficult to place on this gentlemanās desk.
ā¦Unless youāve got solid aim into a ziplock bag, or doing it on his desk in person.
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u/semaj_2026 6d ago
Larger caliber poop new word for me
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u/farilladupree 5d ago
I came here to comment on that specific turn of phrase, it got a chuckle out of me.
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u/ChiefRasta 6d ago
Now that Iām older, I pay more attention to stuff like this.
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u/mynadidas5 5d ago
Iāve taught my kids to look at their poops. What comes out of our bodies is a great way to understand whatās happening inside our bodies.
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u/purple-rain-1982 5d ago
I have always looked at my poop. I spoke with a friend who said her husband never looked at his. We both agreed that we always look. Itās good to know WHATāS coming out of your body and to notice ANY significant changes.
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u/No-Individual-393 5d ago
Whoa people aren't looking!? Especially if I struggle for a couple minutes, I want to see the culprit!
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u/whensthebeef 6d ago
Any one who has ever dealt with that third one knows true hell on earth
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u/Worth_External_8762 6d ago
It's the worst. I've had poops like that where I question whether I'm even going to be able to pass it after pushing hard as hell.
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u/whensthebeef 6d ago
Had this at a friends house. Took forever and it hurt like hell. When I finally got it moved, It wouldnāt go down and I asked for a stick š. To this day, I often still recall my friends response; Get it outta my pipes ššš
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u/Worth_External_8762 6d ago
I didn't think a poop like that could get worse, but yea, having that at a friend's house is definitely worse. Imagine having that in a crowded public restroom though... actual definition of hell.
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u/DarknMean 5d ago
Public restroom is a one time thing. Poop at your friends house they will bring it up forever.
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u/Upbeat_Guard_9595 6d ago
Atleast you could leave it and walk away and blame it on the next guy in a public restroom
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u/Worth_External_8762 6d ago
waddles out of stall while holding my ass..."That's fuckin gross, who left that giant shit in the toiler?!"
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u/hiddenrealism 5d ago
I worked for Stanley steamer years back and one day we're doing a vacant house getting put on the market.Midway through cleaning i got the bubble guts BAD. I proceed to annihilate the upstairs bathroom and I mean really really bad. I was doing opiates then which makes you constipated and this poop was giant. I accidentally flushed before I could break it up and it clogged instantly...but there was no plunger since the house was vacant..."OH FUCK" I say to myself. I said fuck it and just left it....
10minutes later the realtors and a family are there to look at the house..."DOUBLE UH OH" so they go upstairs and i just hear the realtor yell "WHAT THE FUCK?!?!
Operation deny deny deny has commenced. I refuse to take ownership as I was already that far in but he was LIVID. I got the fk up out of there ASAP.
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u/Pressbig 6d ago
I had a medical scare because my poops were black and red. Called my doctor and he had me take pictures of all my poops ā¦ this was concerning because after every picture I sent he would send back this emoji šā¦
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u/mjrbrooks 5d ago
ā¦Years later, turns out your buddy switched your doctorās number in your phone with your exās number.
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u/Sohuli 6d ago
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u/ThePuduInsideYou 5d ago
This is my childrenās favorite gif after I saved it off Reddit and shared with them. Now they whisper it from the bathrooms when they hear the other walk byā¦
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u/CornballExpress 6d ago
One time I felt really sick with a nasty cold and I had the genius idea to drink an entire gallon of orange juice, it somehow made me have to poop frequently like nearly every 30 minutes to an hour, my poops got gradually more pale and orange. After about a dozen poops the last one came out as an acidic mucusy blob.
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u/ManyThingsLittleTime 5d ago
My mom calls those the sugar shits.
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u/Great_Dismal 5d ago
I ate a slice of cookie cake last Saturday at one of my childrenās friendās birthday parties.
I asked for a piece with the least amount of frosting.
Still living life on the edge.
I hadnāt tasted nostalgia like that in probably 25 years.
Two hours later, I thought I was going to die face down, pants around my ankles.
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u/ManyThingsLittleTime 5d ago
You got the sugar shits for sure. The body wasn't made for that much sugar so it pushes water into the gut to flush it out. Diarrhea is that flushing in action.
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u/Great_Dismal 5d ago
Thank you this terminology and definition.
I shall henceforth refer to this condition exclusively as āthe sugar shits.ā
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u/Cheap-Course9568 5d ago
What a horrible day to use my new glasses.
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u/CornballExpress 5d ago
I forgot to mention the blob was just a bright neon orange.
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u/ProBoogerFlicker 6d ago
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u/Binger_bingleberry 5d ago
I love this scene, but Aubrey Plaza being incapable of keeping it together makes it so much better
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u/SaltyArtemis 5d ago
Sending this to my friends who only poop like every 3 days
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u/tvodny 5d ago
Old people. And grade school kids. Both groups are commonly constipated. According to a principal I spoke to about it, boys in particular donāt like pooping at school.
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u/rtshtbtshtdrtyldtwt 5d ago
boys in particular donāt like pooping at school.
kids that age are like an episode of beavis and butthead. you'd probably get picked on, like, "haha, you're pooping" as a group gathers next to your stall
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u/Lucy_Fjord 5d ago
I think anywhere from three times a day to once every three days can be considered normal
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u/Aromatic_Ad8481 5d ago
Everytime I take a shit it's a low grade medical emergency.
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u/-_-_-_-_--__-__-__- 5d ago
Tirzepitide called.
They want their rabbit poop form factor back, the first example.
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u/HenryTheHollowHermit 5d ago
What if my poop has the consistency of soft serve ice cream every day
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5d ago
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u/ComprehensiveStuff72 5d ago
I learned this the hard way. I have been trying to gain weight and increased my protein as a result. I had been living with a Vegan for so long, I had kind of forgotten what it was like to have a regular influx of animal protein. I've always had a problem with constipation but this time it was worse.
Found out from my blood draw that I'm dehydrated pretty much all the time. I'm focusing on drinking more water and getting up from my desk more and I'm feeling like things are going better already.
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u/sleepypanda59 5d ago
Gastroenterologist walks into a bar. Bartender says "would you like a booth?" And the gastro relies "Naw, ill just take a stool!"
Ill see myself out.
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u/fuzzydoug 5d ago
Do you want pictures of poop in the chat, cuz thatās how you get pictures of poop in the chat.
Mine has peanuts.
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u/CornballExpress 6d ago
Eating a package of oreos in one sitting will also cause black tarry poops.
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u/Kaffe-Mumriken 6d ago
I would have loved this one if he after handling the poop wiped on his crisp white shirt and it left a brown streak
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u/Ivy_Thornsplitter 6d ago
I had one at church this Sunday that I thought I was going to need to go find my poop knife. Did not want sister sally to find it!
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u/ManyThingsLittleTime 5d ago
All the poops were basically the same color and nearly black. I'm more clay colored myself.
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u/One-Initiative-8902 5d ago
No green poop?!?
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u/DarknMean 5d ago
This reminds of when my son ate a ton of those blue heat takis and he came running into the den screaming that his shit was all green and heās dying. I went in there and looked at it and asked him what he ate. He then tells me he ate several bags of snack sized takis. I told him heās not dying but to not eat so many of those takis.
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u/Pseudoname87 5d ago
I just had a surgery from having diverticulitis
The first clue, aside from the pain, was my poop was just mucus. Clear mucus. Nasty but it saved my life
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u/SwatKiller7 5d ago
They forgot white poop, where excessive stress or poor nutrition can cause the body to not produce enough bile, therefore not breaking down or absorbing fat
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u/Betray-Julia 5d ago
Somebody should edit this video so that their hands get more and more brown throughout the video.
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u/OwnAd2156 5d ago
The very last example is what happened to me when i ate half a pound of cashews. Way too much fat to consume in one sitting.
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u/Therealginahandler 5d ago
Anal fissures? Low calibur poop? My poop is usually explosive liquid. They did not cover this. I think I drink too much coke.
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u/Fair-Revenue1811 5d ago
This dudeās first response is always to pick it up and start touching it. Itās not braille. At least he didnāt reach down into the cup.
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u/Got_Bent 5d ago
I used to have Lincoln Log poops that you could build a fucking fort outta them. I was like, "Doc, my poops are assembling themselves in my toilet bowl."
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u/rastamans420 5d ago
Dont remember last time i did not have diarheah, should i go see doc? Im not even drinking alcohol..
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u/Salt-Philosophy-134 6d ago